Morning Good - Sesame Park All Over Again - Episode 103
Episode Date: August 3, 2022Thanks to Joe and Artan for coming back on the show. Check them out for more podcasts, clips, and info on shows in NYC as well as on the road.Catch Artan this weekend with former guest, TJ Fr...ancis, in Upstate New York. He's also on Instagram as well @artan_x. Check out Joe on Instagram @joenotfamous and Twitter as well @joe_for_you and follow The Last Show on IG @thelastshownyc.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michael_good1125 and on Twitter @agoodmichaelThis podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Thanks for the F-Shack.
I love dirty Mike and the boys.
Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys?
How you know who we are?
What's this?
They called the podcast?
Morning good, good?
I love that.
Yeah, it's me with the boner on the front.
Welcome to morning.
And we are starting here, and we're here.
It's tragedy happened today.
At Sesame Park.
Are we talking about that?
I'll be, yeah, I mean, something to talk about.
So we're here with Joe Cinerra and Ardennex.
Hi.
Hello. Hi.
You gave me a kiss on the cheek as like a fun joke thing, and it made me so uncomfortable.
Would you, you want to kiss me on the cheek now that we're going?
No, no, no, no, no.
It feels weird.
Like, I feel like...
Did you feel my beard?
I felt his beard.
I didn't like it.
We, it feels...
His beard feels like pubic hair.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's how...
Most beard's beard's feel.
Mine, mine's nice.
No, yours does not feel good.
It felt so...
Like, I'd rather, like, get slapped on the ass by a dude than, than,
like cheek is too intimate.
I don't like intimacy.
Intimacy.
I think you might be the first guy
of kissing on the cheek in years in my life.
Really?
No hesitation.
Yeah, yeah.
You know who didn't get kissed on the cheek?
Those kids at Sesame Park.
They didn't.
The kids did not.
The white kids got molested.
That's what they were.
Yeah, do you want to explain to the good folks?
Yeah, yeah.
So nobody's didn't know what the fuck we're talking about.
We're going to talk about anyways.
This is the talk of the country.
Yeah, well, maybe by the time this comes out,
Sesame Park would be like a serious.
case. That would be so sad if the
Sesame Park thing was brought up on the same trial as like George
Floyd. Like, we're taking it as seriously.
We're one of the earliest podcast talking about it. That when they make the HBO
documentary, there's a clip of this.
He's one of the Sesame Street characters. Yes.
That didn't high-five one of the kids.
One of the cops. They have cops on Sesame Street. They probably
got rid of them now, but I bet you old Sesame Street was like,
here's so-and-so, officer so-and-so, but they always probably made sure as a black
cops and nobody got it.
What?
I was wondering if there's cops on Sesame Street.
I mean, it's in the Bronx, right?
Sesame Street?
Yeah.
There's no cops in the Bronx.
I think it's in Manhattan.
That's a big problem.
It's Queens, Queens.
Michael Good.
The cops don't do their jobs up there in the areas that need.
That's what you're saying?
You're saying we need to over-police the Bronx or Sesame Street?
I think so.
What are you doing?
He's looking up where a Sesame Street.
It's Queens.
Is this why you need a new number?
Give me the...
No, no.
Damn.
Look at that last text.
I'm getting blown the fuck out.
Well, hold on.
I can't read this.
Why not?
On live on the podcast.
Yeah, you can.
We'll edit it out later.
No, we won't.
So the Sesame Street, for those you don't know, basically,
this Sesame Street theme,
you've been to Sesame Park.
I've been to Sesame Park.
Did they touch your hand?
Like, they thought about it.
They died.
They could have told them.
Honestly, this has changed my whole life.
Because before I thought, like, oh, yeah, they gave me a handshake.
But now that I see this.
And I think about all the times I've been to Sesame Park,
the last one was last year.
By who?
By who?
By the people in the costumes.
Oh, you're not,
this isn't an analogy.
I like that verbid, dude.
Somebody doesn't high five.
You call it Sesame Park.
Dude,
totally Sesame Park.
They still have no idea what happened.
Yeah, yeah, I'll explain.
I'll explain.
So this place called Sesame Park.
It's a Sesame Street themed,
uh,
Sesame Street themed theme park.
George Floyd's not there.
He's not there now, now, now.
Where is that guy?
He's in heaven.
Okay.
He's starting out a great.
Doesn't want to talk about who he's texting, but it's so comfortable talking about George Floyd.
Yeah.
We got off on the wrong knee with this podcast.
But, uh, no, I thought that was funny.
All right.
Anyways, fuck you.
I don't know you said what you said.
He said something horrible.
He said something offensive and not fun.
You started it by bringing him up.
Can we switch seats again?
We're supposed to say his name.
I don't like this, this position.
But we're, all right.
We got to get into.
Sesame Park. Okay, tell them what happened. So Sesame Park was, as there's the theme park, and there's a family now that's suing the park because there's two videos out of the characters coming by and not high-fiving black kids, but high-fiving white kids. One of them looks kind of like they're shooing them away.
Yeah, yeah.
But I think it's a tough thing because it's a two-second video.
So, like, you could just be like, this is Elmo, or not Elmo.
Ernie was one of them, right?
He's a big celebrity.
When he's at Sesame's Park, he can't high-five everybody.
You know, maybe they're catching, you know, it's like, have you ever seen a celebrity?
Have you ever done one of those things where, like, everybody goes up and high-five,
just like a celebrity or something like that?
It's like they miss a lot of people and they wave to people.
Yeah. Some people get Sesame Parked.
It happened.
Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I like the way you phrased it to.
Yeah, yeah. Do you think that the little black girl who her family is suing, do you think that she should get to $25 million?
That she's suing for $25 million?
No. I just don't. I don't think so.
Why not? Why not?
Because not being high-fived is the most minor form of racism that there is.
I mean, it's bad. It's definitely bad.
But, like, I think as far as, like, in the grand scheme of things, it's, like, the lowest hate crime you could do.
And I don't think it's worth $250 million. It's $250 million. I'm sorry.
I hope they televised this corking.
That would be honest.
I honestly think what you just said, like,
you're even being nice.
It's not a hate crime.
No, yeah, yeah, to not.
You're like, it's the nice.
It's not a hate crime.
Yeah, yeah.
It would be, now, it would be wild.
Watch, like, Loki in the next few days
this unravels to a horrible thing.
I think that they should start pulling up
this Sesame character's recent tweets.
Yeah.
The mind of the oppressor.
Let's see.
Watch this guy just says a horrible thing.
Ernie's like 14% of the population.
Yeah.
A few percent of the crime.
There's like a tweet from like fucking Burt or I don't know.
I'm not a Sesame Street person.
Maybe you just follow the law.
You wouldn't have to deal with the police.
It's like the park was loud today.
I can see.
What's that like weird new racist like clan, the Patriot front?
Is that what it's called?
I don't know.
Where they got like the white vigilante masks.
What?
If you don't know what it is, then it's just nice.
What is it?
What are you talking about?
There's like this weird thing.
It's like,
They say it's kind of like the clan.
It's like this weird thing called the Patriot Front.
They were like doing some dumb shit.
Why did they...
It's like...
All right.
So everyone's like,
America sucks.
America sucks.
I get it.
I feel that way.
But it's like...
It doesn't have to suck.
But I feel like every time there's a racist group,
they always somehow back themselves up with like background of the flag.
It's like you guys aren't helping the situation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like to be like we're not exactly the clan.
We're the Patriot.
It's like, stop doing this.
Yeah.
You're not helping.
No, of course.
Yeah, yeah.
They should be anti-American.
I think they think they're helping, though.
Yeah, they, well, I don't...
It's also funny because any redneck, he's like, yeah, man, we're America.
We come from England.
But also, people from England are fucking queers.
Like, there's no way they like, like England.
Like, they saw like a British guy, like in tides.
They'd be like, this fucking homo here.
So it's funny to be like my ancestry.
It's like your ancestors, I don't know, it's all, you know what I mean?
It's all weird.
And then Irish ancestry is a bunch of incest.
I believe from what I've heard.
Really?
Yeah, just my father telling it.
No, I'm just kidding.
Yeah.
Arton decided to wear an orange shirt because I was wearing one.
You guys were both wearing orange shirts.
Yeah.
You just far under the mic?
Yeah.
Nice.
That's out of bounds.
It's going to smell horrible.
I want to make sure to use that mic next time I'm going to smell it.
It's going to be so...
No, it's going to smell bad because I have to shit.
I should...
I should...
You sue you for that.
That is a hate crime right there.
That's more of a hate crime than not shaking.
You got $25 million, bitch?
No.
Where did...
Jesus Christ, it smells, too.
Got it.
You got it.
You're sorry to smell like shit.
Yeah, I have a shit.
That's disgusting.
I just had talk...
Oh, God, I'm smelling it now.
It backfired on you.
We should both fart at him.
Okay, okay.
Best podcast, guest.
That's why you didn't tell me who I was doing the podcast.
Yeah, yeah.
I was like, I'm not telling you that Joe's going to be on here.
Why?
I had you on because I need lively people because, like, I've been brave dead.
I went out last night and I feel like shit.
What did you do?
Where were you celebrating?
My buddy was in town.
Yeah.
He just took the bar.
I don't know, we don't know if he passed or not, but he took it.
So we're like, yeah, we'll go out.
And, uh, it still smells whole.
horrible.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It smells bad.
I don't like that your buddy
celebrated just because he took the test.
I mean, he wasn't like, it's my big
celebration. He's like, I'm in town taking the bar
because you have to take it in certain cities.
Really? Where's he from?
He lives in D.C.
So he went to New York, take the bar.
I don't know what the point of that is.
Yeah, what the fuck? Why can't he take it in D.C.?
I don't know.
They have lawyers there.
They have that.
I know. What bar did you go to?
The Capitol Hill.
What's up?
What bar did you do that?
Just the bill.
I'm just the bill.
No, no, no, he took the bar.
I mean, did you guys also go out drinking?
Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We went to a speakeasy, which I don't know.
I don't know. Too many bars in New York are like dimly.
I don't like the dim kind of speakeasy vibe.
It was a speakeasy to be fair, and I chose to go there.
But I like sports bar kind of energy.
You know what I mean?
Like they're playing like maybe some fun music, either like Little Wayne or Blink 182.
Sports on TV.
I hate that shit.
Really?
I like to speak easy.
Oh, yeah.
I like it so weird.
Yeah, I do like that.
You like the volume a little.
so you could talk about your independent movie
You fucking hipster pussy.
That's literally what I like.
You're so pretentious.
I guess.
I don't know.
I just don't like loud.
If you can play like a game at the bar, I'm out.
No, no, I don't mind the volume of the bar,
but I mind the dim light.
I don't like the dim lights and the candle lights at a bar.
It makes me want to drink.
I love it.
Nah, it's weird.
It's like, really fucking is the power out?
I hate that shit.
I feel like also like, I don't know.
We'd have hurricanes in Florida and the power would go out.
And that would be fun.
but I like I still don't like can't a light for a bar.
It's like I like a well-lit bar
or like fun, colorful lights.
I like very cheesy shit.
I don't like fancy shit.
Yeah,
I don't like amusement.
Yes, yes, Sesame Park.
I would thrive there.
They would high five.
I'm just getting like a hundred high-fives from then.
There's like 10 black kids.
I don't know why those kids are having such a bad time.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we should go, dude, we should be like man on the street interview with Sesame Park.
She's like, can we get a second with you, Ernie?
He's like, no.
I love it.
Michael Gitchie's in the back with a foam finger.
Like, have you heard of the Patriot group?
We stand with the races.
Like, we start, like, we're in support of them.
We're like, guys like you and me got to stick together.
Big Bird.
We should all work there.
That'd be sick.
That would be sick.
Is it in New York?
I'll exclusively high-five black children.
It seemed like a very Philadelphia vibe, if you know what I mean.
It's from, isn't Philadelphia?
Okay, well, I nailed it then.
I thought this court case was in Baltimore.
It also had a Baltimore field to it, too,
you're saying it was ethnic?
You do know what I'm saying?
No, it wasn't, is that ethnic if it's one?
Kind of?
I'm very confused.
I genuinely don't understand what you're saying.
It had a DC, Philadelphia, Baltimore, African vibe.
It sounds worse now.
Yeah.
You say it looked like there was a lot of black people at Sesame Park.
It seemed like it.
Well, in that case, they'd be high-fiving more people, though.
Well, that's what I was thinking.
That's what I'm thinking.
Do you think it was like a corporate thing?
They're like, we got to make this a white.
I did know, here, I don't want to.
I don't want a victim blame.
I don't want a victim blame.
But did you guys notice in the video?
It seemed like a couple of times after he gave him a high five, then she went out to give him a high five.
Like it was maybe pre-orical.
It could have been.
Yeah, yeah.
It seemed a little bit like they're practicing to do it for the video.
Yeah.
Luckily, you're allowed to use.
You think all these videos are fake.
I think that one might have been fake.
Yeah, that one I think.
I mean, we'll see.
It's going to be very sad
in the time this rolls out
We find out
There's like a whole
Swastika Nazi group
It's involved in the Sesame Street Park
It's kind of just bad
That the parents
If it is fake
That the parents are just like
Exploiting their kids
To me
Oh for sure
Yeah
Or are they like good
But I also don't really care
I'm like yeah
Fuck Sesame Park
You don't have like
Yeah that's true
Yeah it's like I don't really care
It's like it doesn't bother me
I don't know
But um
I do the only bigger problem
Is like
Then people don't take racism seriously
Because they're like
This is just like
Sesame Park
well this is a little different.
Sesame Park all over.
Yeah.
Just like anytime there's like a racist thing,
we're like,
man,
there's real sesame.
Some black guy goes to an interview
at like some big like law firm
and like doesn't get the job,
it's like Sesame Park all over.
Yeah.
Like racist bullshit.
Yeah, I like Sesame.
Not their views,
but I like,
I like this.
I like,
we're talking about it.
We're getting into a discussion about it.
It is like the,
it is just the funniest.
know why?
Because it's, it reminds me
of like...
The comment section is
so fucking divided.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's like that.
It's just like...
Was that on Facebook, too?
Uh, I don't know.
I saw it on Instagram.
It's just so funny that the conversation is,
is Big Bird, a racist?
Like, it's such a goofy thing.
Like, raises such a serious topic, and then
involving the Sesame Street characters is just
fucking so many of me.
Yeah, it's crazy. That's true.
Yeah, it's fucking wild, dude.
I don't know. Whatever.
Who gives a fuck about Sesame Park?
Yeah.
Fuck Sesame Park
Also, how much is that guy making?
Who?
The guy who's playing a Sesame Street character.
Oh, nothing.
Probably, like, minimum wage.
Yeah, so, like, what the fuck is this?
Like, he's dealing with this bullshit.
He's making fucking $12 an hour.
Well, he probably can't see anything to.
He probably can't see anything in the mask either.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What if it's like a Tony Stark mask?
Like, it's like high tech.
It's like black children.
Don't high five.
Yeah.
White kid.
A high five.
Touch, touch, touch, touch.
Black kid negative
It just flies away
Yeah, it's like he shoots out like a rocket
Yeah, I don't know
But yeah, I went out last night
And speak easy
It was a mixed fan
I don't know, it was okay
It was
Did you go with your girl?
No, no, she stayed in
Because she went out last week
And got too drunk
And worked from home like in bed all day
She was one of the work
She literally was like leaning
Against the bed with the laptop
Which I kind of did today too
I get fucking a horrible hangars.
Did you work from home today?
Yeah, yeah, I work home.
You know, our old, your old job, my job, got a new time shift.
What is it?
It's, so they still have the morning, 7.30 to 3.30, and the night 12 to 8, but they're adding a new 10 to 6.
Ooh, dude, that's fucking sick.
You should get back in that, bitch.
I might.
I think they want to get some people in.
This is for the HVACs thing?
I don't even know what that means.
I think HVAC was like the AC unit.
Don't you do AC?
or something?
I don't do it.
Dude,
what does you look like an AC guy
to you?
I thought you looked like
I install ACs.
I thought you installed it.
What do you do?
What do you do?
It's mail out of company.
Yeah,
which was a fucking sick job.
I don't know what it was like now.
I hate it a little bit,
but it is a sick job totally.
The views are great
because it's like a dude
if you get like the top floor
it's like a Fortune 500 company
and you can just see like so much a manate.
You can literally see like upstate,
not upstate but you can see like mountains
and like New Jersey and stuff.
Like it's a very beautiful view.
It's like one of the best views
that's insane.
I take pictures all the time.
I work on the 40th floor.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I work.
So the listeners they don't know.
I work, my old mailroom job is what already works now.
What?
Yeah.
And they,
did you like get free food?
You just look for food and you'll find it.
Wait, no, that sounds like you're like going through people's
fringes on each floor here and go through the cafeteria.
But there's always like food and conference rooms that hasn't been eaten.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's kitchens that if you're cool with them, they'll give you food.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Every day, like, I'll walk by and they'll be like, hey, what's up?
You want food?
And I'll be like, yeah, sure.
And then they'll be like, how about?
You get the mail in exchange for food?
Like, you want your fucking mail, bitch?
And then today was funny because they were like, like, oh, how about for the other guys?
And be like, yeah, yeah, sure.
Give me more food.
And in my head, I'm like, I'm eating all of this.
I'm going in the bathroom and eating all this.
Yeah, you don't want anybody else to know about it.
I've been doing that more than ever, like wasting time.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a great thing.
It sucks that fucking.
toilets in this place,
they don't have like the
the top lid.
It's only...
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's really just...
What are you talking about?
They're very business toilet.
So they don't have a toilet seat
so that you don't spend as much time on the toilet.
I mean, I got...
It doesn't have the top lid that's closed.
You know?
Because then I would just sit on it with my pants on.
You know you're not supposed to...
My girlfriend says all the time.
I'm not supposed to sit in a lid of toilets because it's supposed to break.
I'm like, what's the point of it then?
I wouldn't sit on...
It's not going to break.
It's not going to...
It's meant for you to sit on.
Maybe if you're as fat as this fucking guy.
You guys sit on the top of a toilet
all the time.
What's the, of course.
Yeah, why's it?
It's just filthy.
It smells like shit.
Why would the top?
You're sitting on the asshole part of people.
The bathroom smells like shit.
If someone shits in the bathroom,
it just smells like shit.
Yeah, yeah, but the top is also just
it just gets filthy.
It's protected.
It's behind you back.
No one touches that.
Yeah.
No, you got guys lifted, moving it all the time,
pissing on it.
You guys are fucking...
Pissing on a close.
That is a savage mood.
But it's a twillcy.
Not in the toilet lid
Pissing on the toilet lid, that is a savage move.
Yeah, I don't know anybody that does that.
I went through a phase where I would go to bars all the time,
especially if I was annoyed,
and I would just, you know how there's always like a garbage can?
Yeah, yeah.
Just completely just pissing the garbage can.
Oh, yeah, yeah, I've done stuff like that before, yeah.
Yeah, but I've done that for like nine months straight one time.
There was like a video, I used to just take point of view,
pissing video.
It sounds like a porn thing, it's not.
But I would just have videos where it's,
like my point of view and then it's just like a thing you don't really know what it is and then you
see a stream hit it so it'd be like you know what I mean just like in the bathroom and then there
there are a couple of where would you piss there's a I mean in college like I pissed on a wall one
time yeah just like just like yeah just like so but you want to know where what was happening
the video and then you see like just like that's pretty much I mean it's wild sometimes you go
to a public it's horrible because it's just piss everywhere you're like how the fuck did this
happen during the day it's at a bar I get it because you're shit face pain all the place
but when you're sober and you're like do especially if you go and after somebody you're like I
know that was you that just fucking pete
like I don't understand people would pee on a toilet seat like that's
fucking nuts to me yeah I don't do that
I don't do that I don't like living with
I hate when you live with someone and like they piss on
the seat and you're like come on bro
yeah I live with a woman so that would be that would be disgusting
if she was pissing on the toilet seat on that's even possible
you're missing have you ever seen a woman pee it's fucking
ludicrous I have hours of videos
download it on my phone they like it
shoots out of them like god damn
like a like a fire
yeah yeah did you just watch this
yeah yeah yeah
Yeah, you're like mind-blown.
I see, I mean, it's crazy.
I remember when I was in college one time.
That's the first time you saw a woman be in college?
I think, like, public, like on a public street.
Through a hole in the wall.
I guess because she was drunk, no, no, she was, yeah, just out, out.
And she's just like, hey, can you cover me?
I'm like, yeah.
And then I just hear, like, it's not like a war going on.
Yeah, yeah.
She was like, can you cover me and see how crazy this?
Are you shooting it out of you right now?
What the fight?
That's how I learned they have a different pee hole.
Yeah, and they also, it's also, they don't have penises.
Yeah, but it's not the,
I always thought it was like
they have the hole, then you fuck the hole and they'd
pee, whatever. I still don't understand.
Their vagina, like, I don't know.
Yeah, I still don't fully understand. They're like, it's a different
hole. I'm like, sure it is.
Dumb woman. Yeah, okay. No, it's the same hole.
I don't know. No, I think it's like, I was told it's like a different
hole, a million times. Where's the other
hole? I've fucked so many vaginas. I've never
seen a second hole, bro. They got
one hole. Just ask them nicely next
next time. I think it's like, is it like
a predator hole? I genuinely don't understand
the vagina. Is it like a predator
hole where it comes out like the movie predator yeah like like is there another hole
vagina that's inside the vagina what hole is in predator but not the hole but like you know how
the alien i'm thinking of where the mouth comes out is it like another oh yeah yeah is it another
one that comes yeah because like i know i i get it i just found out that you know how it's when
you're like when they're like talking about hitting the back walls or whatever i always say you need to have
a humongous dick and hit like some back of the put like basically up to the throat or something
but it's not it's like you know how they like this or whatever
Yeah, yeah.
That's the back wall.
Not really.
Yeah, it is.
It expands, though.
Right up.
It's the pussy right up.
You can have a small dick and hit the back wall.
I was like, oh, we up.
Yeah, but like, we up, yo.
I just found out.
I was like, the back wall's right here.
First of all, you up.
Me and Michael Good, have huge cocks.
Yeah, you got to fucking.
Unnecessary.
Unnecessary.
Can you look up a difference between vagina and urethra images?
Because I genuinely, this is too long in my life to not understand this.
I don't know so much about
Well, because you're never really like
examining it deeply, you know what I mean?
You're either putting your penis in it
Or even, you know what I mean?
It's like you're not really seeing like the
What the fuck?
You guys should talk because this is gonna take me a second.
I wanted to talk about the movie.
Did you go talk about nope yet?
No, I want to talk about that?
Hold on.
But I loved it.
You didn't like it.
I didn't like it.
You could say what you didn't like it.
I just weren't, there'd be no spoilers.
Why not?
I love it.
Because then you lose listeners
and people will stop listening to the episode.
I loved it.
Why can't we talk about no?
Because if there's a listener, I've listened to a podcast before,
and they talk about something I haven't seen before,
and they turn it off, so I want this to be something for everybody.
How many holes does a female body have down there?
It says how many holes does a female body have down there?
This is the website.
What the fuck?
First thing that, all right, I'll try to come up with non-spoiler things.
I didn't like how many different genres he tried to do,
and I think he failed in every single one.
Like horror, it was not scary at all.
I agree it wasn't scary.
I thought it was nerve-racking at points, but not scary.
Yeah, yeah, I like that.
No, one part, and it wasn't even real.
One part was like nerve-wracking,
and then it turned out it wasn't, it was fucking nothing.
What are you talking about?
The scene were the fucking aliens.
That's not the only nerve-wracking.
Yeah, it's fine, it's fine.
No, the UFO movies, don't.
The monkey scene is nerve-wracking.
That was hilarious, dude.
But that didn't even come back at the end.
That was the coolest part of the whole movie
was the monkey stuff.
Yeah.
And then it's the first scene, it's not going to do it.
Chimpanzee.
It's not just.
They come back to it.
in the middle, but then the ending, it's like, oh, what was the point of that?
That's what I'm saying.
I don't know what the point is.
He loves his listeners, dude.
I love him.
The great...
100 episodes.
Congrats by the way.
We're like 100.
I'll tell you what.
Fucking, what is it?
Hey, he does work at Sesame Party.
That's the guy really does work at Sesame Party.
Hold on.
No, no.
There are two openings in the Volvo.
That means pussy boys.
The vaginal opening.
He sounds so fucking retarded.
And the opening to,
the urethra. Like I was saying
the urethra. Yeah, yeah, but it's like one behind
the other... The urethra opening
is the tiny hole that
you pee out of located just below your clitoris.
I know. Okay, that makes sense. I understand it now.
Yeah, it shoots out like a laser
basically. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A broken laser that's
more like a disco ball.
It's more like this little thing, that's what they
shoot out, and this is a pussy out this really...
Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is the fuck...
But the rewether is too small to fuck.
If you're good for God.
Yeah, I was... You can't fucking urether
Unless you're fucking Joe over here is a baby dick.
No, I don't have a baby.
Oh, they have a picture.
Of a baby.
Hopefully not.
No, yeah, vaginal opening.
You know what I did like in the movie?
My favorite, like, part of the movie was when it got really dark.
Yeah, that makes perfect sense.
All right, I get it.
Did you see art?
And then they shit on the house.
They took a dump on the house.
Took a dump on the house.
That was the best part of the movie.
That is a sick part.
That looked cool.
It looked awesome.
And it was like blood, too.
Because in the trailer, it just looked like black ink.
But this was like really scary.
And, but that was it.
And the ending, it was like...
All right.
Let's go.
Go on.
You know what it was scary?
We're not going to spoil.
The scene when...
The first scene, when they...
The sister steals the fake horse.
The porcelain horse, she steals from the carnival people.
Yeah.
And then those three kids come and pretend...
Stop! Stop! Stop!
! Stop!
But that was scary for a story.
second.
But it was just like,
it meant nothing.
We're moving on.
We're moving on.
We're moving on.
I love the actors.
The characters were great.
I didn't think the main actor had a lot of,
what's it called,
like personality.
He had no personality.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He is a good actor, though.
He's the, he's great.
He's fantastic.
But in that, I felt like he wasn't great
because he wasn't doing,
he was kind of a lack of a character in that.
He played it good, though,
just like a guy with no personality,
just a complete bummer.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's also, I don't know if that's good acting to not.
No, he was good acting because there are scenes when he doesn't say anything and you know exactly how he's feeling.
That's great.
That's a good point.
That's a good point.
And I like Kiki Palmer and I like the Asian Asian Palmer.
I also like that Spanish dude.
I don't know who he is.
He was fucking great.
He was great.
He was great.
Yeah, he was great.
He was phenomenal.
But I'll tell you what, the only thing that I love the movie, I do love the movie, but I didn't like with the Asian guy with the monkey.
that I'm like there was
Like you said
What's the point of it?
Like I felt like they didn't really go to this
Like a first is early on the movie
So yeah
Yeah but they didn't
I got to explore his character
Yeah
Well yeah
Well anyways
I think that Jordan Peel is a great movie
Yeah
He's whack dude
I'm never watching a Jordan Peel movie
He's so fucking dude
That shit is
Nah he's dope
I don't like how you're supposed to like
You know not sorry
I just thought of the Sesame Park thing again
I like to think that
You know how like
I like to think that it was a white guy
In the suit who like
Fucked up a bunch of handshakes
The Black guys
And now he's like
He just doesn't know how to land it correctly.
Either that or there was a black guy that did the too, too smooth thing.
Like the way you try to pound it, it goes too soon or like too slow.
And he's just like, I'll show you.
I'll show all of you people.
Yeah.
And it's like, that's not really anything.
Because the guy in Nope with the monkey when he was working as a child actor,
that's a massacre.
That's a $25 million suit, you know?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
By the way, it's just going to sound racist if they haven't seen Nope now.
Yeah, there was a monkey.
neck to those two things, but yeah.
Yeah, that's true. There's black people, and then there's
a monkey. A chimpanzee. Yeah, whatever.
They should have made them more rednecky.
Yeah, yeah, I agree.
Like, the brother's sister
should have been...
Are these rednecks or not?
That's true, that's a good point. The whole time, there should have been a weird
relationship between them.
You want an ancestral thing and dope.
The Mexican guy is like,
what the fuck?
Yeah.
You should have been like, you're looking at my sister?
That's my sister, and I'm gonna fucker.
That is the funniest thing about incest theme porn,
and none of it do they have Southern accents.
There's not a single one you can find with your Southern accents.
That's what the point of the movie should have been.
The aliens want to stop incest.
Yeah, that's real thing.
There was no porn in that movie.
There was no sex in that movie at all.
None of his movie.
He's like high art.
He's like, I don't put tits in movies.
He says that?
No, I'm just guessing because he's kind of like,
I wouldn't say he's pretentious.
No, he's a nerd.
Yeah.
This was a nerd.
A nerd movie. This was a nerd movie.
This is a great movie, dude.
I like it. He is a nerd, though.
And also, he shot an IMAX, so I saw it in IMAX.
I'm not a big fan of IMAX.
It just shakes the theater.
I don't give a shit about that.
I went to see Thor.
I went to see Thor and IMAX.
I heard it was horrible.
That movie, I left in 20 minutes.
That movie fucking sucked.
And first of all, I went in and it smelled so bad.
Like, I never, I don't go to Marvel movies.
And I totally didn't expect.
What I should have been expecting.
The only thing I didn't like about.
It was contained in there.
Like, I went in.
And you know, like, when smell is, like, starting, and then it's like, oh, shit, it might
smell bad.
And then it smells bad.
Yeah.
This was, like, a force field where you stepped in and it smelled bad.
It smelled like butter and just body odor.
Like, popcorn butter mixed with, like, I haven't showered in three years.
Was there people in there that smelled?
Or do you think it was from, like...
It was people and just food, disgusting food.
Who was in there?
What kind of people?
Autistic people.
Just fat guys?
Yeah.
It depends on how early you go.
Fat guys and girls with colored purple hair.
Why the fuck do they like Marvel movies?
Because it's escapism.
I mean, I have it too, but I'm going to a really sad period of my life.
I'm going to watch Batman and explore into it.
So some people, if the sadder your life is the more you are into.
Batman's a little at least like, I don't know what the right word,
dramatic.
Where these movies are like happy, everything's amazing.
Oh, funny joke here.
But I don't mind it though because I also, like I need escapism.
But also movies that have.
escape is a minute, you're going to find sad people
that. You know what I mean? It's like nobody's sad is going
to see like, I don't know, like,
Wolf of Wall Street, really. You know what I mean? That's kind of like a bro.
Everything is sick, bro. We're going to go watch Jordan.
You never have a dirty. You know what I mean? It's like,
but people that want to go see those movies are like,
my life sucks. Let me get out. And I, as
I said, I went alone to go see
fucking multiverse of madness. So I'm part of that included.
That's true. That's true. The whole idea of a movie
theater is to escape. Yeah, yeah.
All of those things. Yeah, I ordered
nachos for nope and I ate all my
nachos before the movie started.
You got it because it's going to be so noisy. Bummed out.
Yeah. You don't want to eat nachos during
a movie? That shit's mad loud in your head. I was
thinking that, but I ate all of them immediately.
Yeah. And I just felt bummed
the whole time. But I do love, I love
summer movies. That's the shit. I like that.
So hot outside and you go to like a cold movie theater.
I like that Daniel Kalu is kind of like a
fat hero. Yeah, he's chubby.
He's like a chubby fat hero.
Oh, Thor? No, no.
No. The guy.
Daniel Kaluya or whatever.
Oh, yeah.
He's fat?
He's fat?
He's built like...
He's a fat guy.
Like T.J. Francis.
See, I think we need to get a fatter guy.
I don't know.
You can't get any fatter than him.
You can't.
Before it starts getting gross.
Before it's unbelievable.
Yeah.
He's as fat as a hero I can...
The beam...
He's trying to beam him up.
It's just like too heavy.
I want to spoil the movie, but I won't.
Don't.
You don't.
Don't spoil this fucking movie.
You showed.
But, yeah, I didn't like it.
Yeah, I liked it.
Never going to watch a Jordan Peel movie.
Did you like, did you like Get Out?
That we could talk about it.
Get Out was great.
Get Out was awesome.
Get Out was awesome.
I also forgot.
It was a better idea.
The bad guys they chose were hilarious, though.
I like how the bad guys were.
Eric from Billy Madison was one of the bad guys.
And the other bad guy.
He was great, and he was great.
And so the other bad guy was the My Stapler guy from Office Space.
What movie are we talking about?
Get out.
Get out.
Okay.
So there's his girlfriend's dad.
That's Eric from Billy Madison.
And the brother, the brother.
He's a great actor too.
Yeah, yeah.
And then the other guy was the guy that wanted his vision.
The guy who lost a blind guy.
That's the my stapler guy from office base.
You see, Meeteple?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's a good actor too, dude.
Yeah, he was scary.
Yeah, yeah.
You'd be surprised that people can really cross over.
Like, they got to have, you don't be grab.
I bet you Steve Correll could play an amazing serial killer movie.
He plays like a happy go lucky guy.
He's like, hey, what's going on?
guys.
Has a, but he like low-key.
Well, he does.
He does a fox catcher.
You ever see that movie?
Oh, that movie's great.
That movie's fucking for the mom.
He plays like, it's a true story about a guy.
What did he molest these guys?
Yeah, he was molesting these like,
wrestlers?
Like, world Olympian wrestlers or whatever.
He was a Dupont.
He was a Dupont.
What's a DuPont?
Like, one of the richest families of all time in America.
They like literally.
That's what Channing Tatum and the Hulk.
Mark Ruffalo.
Mark Rufelo.
You kind of remind you.
me of him a little bit, to be honest.
Channing Tatum, I know.
No.
Anyway, so what do you want to talk about?
No, the molesting, what happens in the movie?
So basically, he has,
he's the richest family America.
Spoil every movie, but nope.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't give it.
At this point, I had time to go see his movies.
It's about, like, these great wrestlers or whatever.
He starts, like, a wrestling, uh, I don't know.
He basically sponsors him.
He's a rich guy who likes college or Olympic wrestling.
Yeah, he has no sports background.
None at all.
It's obviously a fucking pedfile.
He gets them, isolates them, gets them addicted to drugs,
and then starts, like, fucking them, basically.
Ugh, it's not good.
And one guy, because they're brothers,
one guy's like, I want my brother,
but he doesn't speak to his brother anymore.
He's basically addicted to whatever drug.
So he goes to see him,
and then Steve Correll just shoots him in cold blood.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
That's also funny.
It's a crazy fucking that movie.
It would be funny, though, if the guys didn't even work for the Olympics.
He's just, like, molesting, like,
but he's exactly what you were saying.
Like, not even kids, though,
just like 30-year-old.
guys, you're like, yeah, I coached the Olympics, you'd be
great for this.
He was just a rich guy.
There's these rich guys in, like, fucking Abu Dhabi
that open MMA gyms just so they
could have, like, UFC fighters come and, like,
pictures, yeah.
But they have no, like, background in anything.
They're just so rich.
Yeah, yeah.
That makes sense.
Our wrestling coach got fired.
Why?
What did he do?
Are you just adopting kids?
To get, so they'd be in his school district?
He was adopted?
He got arrested for that?
No, no, not arrested.
Sorry, fired from being a wrestling coach.
and then he just ran his wrestling gym out of a like a shopping center.
So it would be weird because it would be like you be like a grocery store
and the next to it was just mats on the ground and it's like random place.
But he wasn't fucking these kids.
No, no, he's a great guy.
That's funny is he's a poor guy who just cares about wrestling.
You're like, that's so much more sad.
Loses his job.
Ends up way worse than.
Yeah, the guy who's fucking kids.
What happened to that guy, the pond?
You get killed?
I don't know what happened to him.
I got to rewatch that movie.
It's pretty long.
I mean, I think they, like, poisoned the pipe, like a pipeline for water or whatever in Flint, Michigan.
I think those are the...
That's how that you're connecting that.
It's somehow related.
I think that they've done that.
They bought a bunch of arms.
They were, like, arms dealers for America during, like, the, like, I think the civil war became the richest country.
And then I think they poisoned water or whatever.
Oh, shit.
Then one of their weird, creepy nephews raped a bunch of Olympia.
athlete. I don't know.
What? Yeah. It's great. I mean, that
that's an interesting thing. That's the ending of
Nope. You shouldn't have spoiled.
You have some of you guys just loki try to sneak the
ending of Nope into conversation.
Oh, yeah, we should do that.
Just like subtly somehow spoil it.
Do you think that there are aliens on Earth
right now? Dude, my listeners are tired of this,
but I'm getting deep into this conversation. I'm showing
to aliens. I think they're all real.
Yes. No, I think I believe in the...
Every single one of them.
Every one of them.
No,
I think the grays are real
because there's enough consistency
with that.
They're the gray aliens
that have the big black eyes.
They have big black eyes?
Yes.
Yeah,
yeah,
just like gray aliens
with a bunch of black eyes.
Yeah,
yeah, yeah.
Why do they have the most evidence?
Because there's just consistency with it.
What is it?
Like it's like just like,
like most big abduction stories describe it.
But then there's like some guy
who's like,
yeah,
these like praying mantis aliens abducted me.
I'm like,
you're out of your fucking mind.
I was like,
I'm sorry,
I don't believe that.
people who have claimed to see aliens or UFOs
probably fucking love
Nope
Oh, like hell yeah
Yeah yeah yeah
I saw this shit
Yeah
You know what of my favorite things I saw is
There was like multiple people who claimed they got abducted by aliens
Yeah
And a lot of these people were found with like a bunch of child porn on them
And I was like how funny would it be
If the aliens abducted them
And then to decredit them
Just planted child porn all in their house
And call the cops on that
Yeah
But I don't think you're wrong.
I just think that that's literally like a group, like a CIA group did that.
Oh shit.
Dude, I didn't even think about that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I would think that that's what it's like it's the best way to decredit somebody.
You're like, no, this guy's a pedophile.
I'm not going to listen to anything he has to say.
Yeah.
Like, it's totally unrelated because you could totally be abducted by aliens and be a pedophile.
Like those two things are not mutually exclusive.
That's a fact.
Maybe Michael Jackson's.
You can't, you can't have any claim.
As soon as someone's like, look at all the pedophile shit on his computer.
Nope.
You can't feel like.
I'm talking about A
we'll get to B in a minute.
He has two files, alien footage,
and then kids, you're like,
no, that's not true.
I'll get to that in a second here, hold on.
What if some Michael Jackson,
like, they saw him moonwalking,
and they were like, oh my God,
he's, he's an alien.
Put child porn on his computer.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, that would be even more complex
because he got caught banging kids
so the aliens made robots
to go down there
and say they got molested
by Michael Jackson to...
Those are robots.
I mean, he looks like a fucking
When he had all that story, he looked wild.
Yeah.
Yeah, he looked psychotic.
I do think, though, I mean, movies literally make me think things.
Like, they change my mind all the time.
Like, when I watched Interstellar, then...
You thought Matthew McCona was a good actor.
That's what...
He is a great actor.
That movie did change my opinion because he was only in bad movies before that.
And then he, like, showed us and we're like, oh, fuck, he's great.
No, but that's when I was like, oh, oh, maybe it's not aliens.
Maybe it's, like, people from the future.
That are helping us.
Yeah, so those are the possible, there's a couple different things.
That's pretty cool.
So there's the ultra-terrestrial theory, which is like that they've been inside the planet the whole entire time, and they come out from deep inside the ocean, and that's what we're seeing in the UFOs.
There's the theory that we are a mix of hominid chimpanzee type things and alien DNA.
So like they spliced their DNA with us because there's a giant jump in the evolutionary gap.
So basically they're like our gods.
I ain't a monkey, brother.
Hell no.
I didn't come from no ape.
I do.
Yeah, I think that, I don't know.
But that's the one theory is like,
because there is a giant evolutionary gap
when it goes from chimpanzees,
not chimpanzees,
but the thing before chimpanzees to humans.
It's like crazy.
And then the other one is that that's us in the future
because like what happens is to end racism,
we have,
we all become like the same color to end sexism to end stuff like.
We all go back to being monkeys.
No, no, no, because we, we go the other way
where we shave our heads and we get like,
like,
I think it's both.
Because here's what.
Have you seen like a Brooklyn non-binary?
They become more and more...
Alien.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, no, you're not wrong about that.
Piercings?
Yeah.
I don't know aliens.
Piercings, but...
Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're scared.
Like, the androgynous look is like the alien...
Like, it's like they wear the black suits that are like, it's...
Who knows what that is?
That's, you know what I mean?
It's not one.
It would be funny.
There's just alien, like, a dress.
Yeah, I don't know.
Because the only thing is, I do think that, like, it could be people from the future.
I get that.
But there has to be something else, too, because, like, all these monuments...
Oh, wait, there's a third one.
The third one is...
We coexist, I think.
Because all these monuments, like, pyramids and shit that, like, nobody can explain how they're here.
It's like, then there must have been a civilization that was smart before us.
Yeah, no, I definitely believe that.
I could also believe that a civilization made nukes, and we're going through, like, the second cycle of that and blew up the...
That's what some people think, yeah.
But the other theory is that they are, like, uh...
They're us in the future.
But they're cyborgs.
So, like, they're, like, part machine.
And that's why, like, like, those things are, like,
like, somewhere Neurrelink or some crazy Elon Musk project is, like, what creates those.
And that's basically going to be what we are in the future.
And this is all just based on Joe Rogan.
Shout out Joe Rogan, dude.
Shout out Joe, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
My girlfriend's going to kill herself.
She hears of me say that.
What are you going to save?
Joe's the only one who can save us, for real, from a day job.
I love Joe Rogan because I don't have to be a substitute.
teacher. That's it.
See, I like, I like the podcast, but like, he just gets stuck on the same topics too much.
The same way I do. Like, to be fair, like, I'll get stuck on retarded people and pedophiles.
Like, those are my two main topics.
Yeah, that's the bread and butter.
But for him, it's trans athletes and, uh, I don't know, like free speech or something like that.
You know what I mean? So it's like, I agree with a lot of his points, but I also don't
care. And, uh, yeah.
Yeah, I just like when he, it sucks when you say like, oh, I like Joe Rogan and people are
like, oh my God. Like, you're politically right and all this.
shit. Right wing.
I just like when he has
like Theobon on his podcast. Yeah, yeah. He's a great
Yeah, because the people, I'm not listening to him
and Jordan Peterson talk for four hours. I'm listening
to him and like, I don't know, like
when he had fucking.
Dave Chappelle's like, yeah, he's not
going to hear that. It's almost crazy to be
like I don't like Joe Rogan experience
because it's like it's the biggest show so he
does get the coolest guests in the world.
How do you not like it? He gets the
best guess. Yeah. If you're
the most popular, you just end up being
awesome. He hasn't had Chet Hanks on yet
now. That's what I'm waiting for.
Four hours that retardation.
Dude, I fucking love Chet Hacks. He's
like sobered out. He posted one of the funniest videos the other
day. He's about like just not making excuses
for yourself. He's like, don't, one of those where he's just
you know just yelling at the camera and you're like, you're out of your
fucking mind. He's like, you have no excuses.
No excuses at all. Yeah.
It's like, what stop? He's like, you're going to go out tonight, huh?
He's like, I challenge you guys do a lock in. Lock yourself
in your apartment for 20 hours.
And don't leave until you've gotten everything you want.
done or some crazy shit, but I need to leave.
Yeah.
Don't eat, dude. No.
Pay money for someone to deliver it to your house.
Put you in your hands.
Rub it on your face.
It's never in their fucking speech.
It's like, yeah.
Yeah, my dad was the highest paid actor in the world at one point.
It's just like, you're not working hard enough.
Not like me.
Tom Hanks' son.
You know?
Fuck dad.
Yeah, I just, I don't like Tom Hanks that much.
I feel like I partially don't like him.
It's so dumb, but that Rick Hed Jervase thing kind of about when he was like one of the
Oh, what he made a face?
Yeah, it's so dumb that I will hold that against Tom Hanks, like an incredible actor.
No, I get that 100%.
Yeah, we don't like people that pretend they don't like jokes.
I get them.
Yeah, yeah.
It's so weird, that's like a deep thing to me.
Like, there's like other people.
It's like a betrayal, I guess.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I also don't love Ricky Jervais.
So it's like, yeah, I don't know.
I like Ricky Jury.
I like anyone famous think it could help me.
Did you see his last special?
No.
It's great.
It's really good.
Yeah, I didn't watch.
The only reason I didn't like him is because, like,
I saw it.
I'll not like people for like the dumbest.
Why are you doing this?
He started.
He says to me parking you, bro.
He's mad at it.
Yeah, yeah, there we go.
Yeah, that's how you give a high five.
Annoying.
What is this year?
You're Portuguese, right?
My mom's Ecuadorian and my dad is Portuguese.
No, my dad's.
Oh, there we go.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it was a way off.
And I have no ties to any of them.
You have no what?
I have no, like,
I think this is dying.
I just bought it.
I have, like, no ties to my culture.
Oh.
Do you?
Do I have ties to Portuguese culture?
How do you feel connected to your culture?
Uh, I have a...
You're Albania, right?
Don't let us interrupt you there, Art.
Jesus, right, this guy?
He's on his phone.
I know.
Asking him a question.
You're on your phone smoking that fucking vape?
What do they have to do with any of that?
I love the idea that you really hate people with smoking nicotine.
That's just like, so there's a deep-gilton you.
Yeah, in my fucking face, dude.
Oh, my God.
kids on their cell phones and their fucking vaporizers.
I don't like how everyone shits on Elon Musk when he's literally like our world's hero.
See, I thought that, but then I found out of the thing about his dad and I'm like, I don't know.
What is that?
I don't know anything about his cousin or whatever.
His dad is banging his step-sister.
Who gives a fuck?
That's not anything to do with him.
I don't care if you're banging your mom, but it's weird when it's like in the pedophiles.
I mean, for the mom, it's weird.
But like, going down is weird.
But what's that got to do with Elon Musk?
you're right to be fair
that doesn't have anything to do with him
he I feel like he's always
I always thought he was like a good guy
and then I feel like the neurolink thing
is weird so what's that
just trying to put microchips people's brains
which is weird I guess trying to make the world better
but it's kind of like it seems
I don't like that
I'm not a fan of that
and by the way these are just based on
conspiracy theories also I'll take back
like I don't care what his dad's do I think his dad
that's weird as fuck that his dad was doing that
but that's not him that's fair
it's not him because my most great people's dad
start pieces of shit.
Yeah.
So that's why I'd never be great
because my dad is the nicest guy.
Nice guy.
My dad is literally like
Brian Cranston from Malcolm
the middle.
Not the metal one.
Not breaking bad.
But yeah, Malcolm in the middle.
He's Walter White.
Yeah, no, he's just like
the nice guy.
But the neurolink thing's weird to me.
And then like it seems like he's always
fucking somebody's wife.
Like he fucked like the Google guy's wife.
And I'm like, dude.
I don't notice.
Dude, it's like, I understand people make mistakes.
But they're like,
and then he fucked Johnny Depp's wife
while they were having a thing,
Amber her.
And I'm like,
if this guy's just constantly fucking people's wives
I don't trust him. I'm sorry.
It's like I know that's a base level thing but it's like
if you're not, if you're gonna have
it shows like a lack of character.
I don't know. It's like listen
I think moral people do cheat
and moral people do fuck other people's spouses but in a way
it's an immoral thing so I'm like
I'm gonna hold this against you if you're about to put a microchip
in my brain. Are you gonna put a microchip
brain so you can fuck my girlfriend? What do you do?
First is the chip in your brain?
He's like only the dudes to get the microchips.
The only thing
that I know about Elon Musk is that
he tries to
give us a new transportation system
and he's trying to like literally
make ships to help us colonize other
fucking places. I also don't trust him because on
UFOs he's like, yeah, I don't know anything about that.
I'm like, how do you not know that? Because like
how is the U.S. government releasing this stuff where like UFOs are a thing?
And then he works for the space
company, he's like, I've never even heard of this. I'm like,
he's playing stupid. Yeah, he's lying. Like, if he was
who's going? Oh, yeah, I've heard of it. I don't know what it is. I'll be like,
that's reasonable. But to be like, oh, I have no. I'm like, Obama says they know, you know what
I mean? He's like, like, clearly there's something to this shit and you know what it is. So I think he's like,
but by the way, like a month ago, I was like full, fuck yeah, Elon Musk. But then now,
I feel like just over time I'm starting to like him a little less. And then his chest is weird.
I don't know. His chest? Yeah, you see that thing of this fucking giant horse? It's been a weird
fucking chest, dude.
Yeah.
Fucking everybody's...
Also, like, I will hold...
Like, if I don't know somebody,
I'll hold something bad against them.
Like, if I know somebody,
like, I have friends that are good pieces.
Arden, be my friend.
What?
Be my friend, Arden.
I'm your friend.
Why are you being mean to me on the podcast?
I'm not being mean to you.
Everyone knows you're being mean to me.
I don't.
You're at, yeah.
He's mad about that far from earlier.
Like, I can just, I can see it in his face.
He's like, he's like, yeah, I'll continue.
Because, you know, I know this is a...
We're working on an important program here,
the morning good podcast.
I'm being on my best.
What do you think about Elon Musk?
I don't know anything about Elon Musk.
See, that's like Elon Musk with UFOs.
You clearly know everything about Elon Musk and you're fucking...
I don't have a chip in my brain, dude.
Elon Musk is cool, dude.
I let him fuck my girlfriend every once in a while.
It's fine.
I don't be doing it.
I don't like hate him.
Like, it's like, I don't know.
I think he does have, like, great ideas.
But I just start to get a little bit more suspicious of him.
Doesn't he not like, isn't he like scared of AI or whatever?
Yeah, but then he's like putting microchips.
in your brain. You know what I mean? It's like weird to be. I understand. I think the whole thing is
so we can compete with AI, which is smart. That is a good thing. Like I get why we'd want to be
able to do that. Well, it's also, I've accepted that artificial intelligence robots, that's
evolution, actually. Like, we're being egotistical to be, like, afraid of that. Like, no, because we're
the top of the food chain now, because we evolve because we have brains. If they are smarter than us
and have our uniform body, whatever.
Like, they're the next step in evolution.
Amish are kind of smart.
What if that's what they were onto?
What?
The Almish were like, that's why we don't go AI.
They saw this coming.
I get that.
God came to them and was like,
stay the fuck away from fucking machines.
They're going to take over and they're going to fuck your girlfriend.
I can't believe.
I mean, wait, wait, machines are fucking our girlfriends,
vibrators.
Yeah, the machines are taking over and fucking our girlfriends.
Yeah, that's true. Better.
Yeah.
But I've learned.
They took my job.
That's so funny.
They're like, literally technology.
They took my, I,
I fucking, I worked
data entry job
and it became obsolete
because of...
And a vibrator's a good job?
Yeah,
vibrated just still there.
Yeah, yeah.
I once,
I had a girlfriend once
and,
and this is the first time
I used cock rings
ever in my life.
Oh, it's great, yeah.
Yeah, but the thing,
have you ever used a cock ring?
Sorry,
I only have men on this podcast,
get out of here.
It's a vibrating ring.
You put on the base of your dick.
You fuck a girl,
and then it, like, vibrates on their clit.
So...
I don't like that.
Exactly.
Exactly right.
So this bitch,
she's not cheating on me right
but we use a cock ring
she fucking loves it right
and then
I remember
we started using it more often
and then we're about to fuck one time
and she's just like
where's a cockering
and I like got jealous
of this cockering
I was like we're not using it anymore
whore
I felt betrayed
yeah I don't like it
it's like when a wife
gets mad at their husband
for not wearing their wedding ring
it's like
why aren't you wearing your wedding ring
why aren't you wearing your fucking
cockering
yeah
I take it off
sometimes, honey, sorry.
Yeah.
This other chick one time was like,
hey, do you want to, like, bring toys into this?
I was like, all right, I don't care.
But she's like, what, you don't get hot
like by the idea of like fucking me with a vibrator.
I'm like, that's lesbian sex.
You want to have lesbian sex with me?
That's like unmanly.
And then she's like, she's like, yeah,
you don't think it's how.
I'm like, all right, do you want to get a,
what's that, the pussy thing?
A pocket pussy?
Do you want to have a pocket pussy
and hold it while I fuck it?
And she's like, oh, I see your point.
I'm like, yeah.
Do you see my point now?
These chicks are getting wild.
Honestly, I don't have a problem
making women robots.
Yeah, just you're a sex dog guy?
Yeah, honestly, well, I don't know.
Well, yeah, because like...
Do you think they make them smell a little bit?
Because, like, I think I wouldn't want to have sex
the sex doll if it didn't smell a little, like...
Like sweat.
They're going to be...
so much...
You're going to be the best of humans.
They're still not that good.
No, not now.
Yeah, but what about cars?
They started fucking horrendous.
But some things, though, you can tell
people are not caring enough about
for it to evolve that far.
So there's not enough people that want to fuck sex dolls
for them to evolve that fast.
I don't think it'll ever be good.
No, you guys are wrong.
Sex is literally the biggest driver
in humanity.
Yeah, but they...
Yeah, but the people who will
buy sex robots...
Yeah.
Would rather just buy a sex slave.
No, but they probably don't have
regular sex in the first place.
Like, if you can afford a...
Yes?
No, also, everyone who has...
If you're banging on the regular,
why would you get a robot?
What if a robot is just like the girls
that you bang on the regular, but hotter and
no bullshit?
You're gonna try it out, and then if you like it,
I don't know, you get addicted to anything.
Also...
But the problem is this.
Okay, so anybody that's rich enough to a...
afford a sex dog can afford a hooker, so they'd rather
fuck a hooker than a sex doll.
Sex dolls are thousands of dollars. A hooker's
like a thousand dollars. So why would you pay
thousands of dollars? I mean, I, to
fuck something that's not going to have the same
effect. Here's what. Hookers have diseases,
that's why. Yeah. Also, sex
robots won't have accusations. They won't have legal suits. They won't
divorce. You can accidentally kill your sex
doll, bury in the woods.
The whole town's not going to make a fuss about it.
Also... You think your robot, your sex robot
could get a virus? Sex robot?
That'd be so funny.
Yeah.
You push that in, by the way.
It's been recording all day.
You're good.
Yeah.
Sex robots.
You're good.
Don't worry about it.
Honestly, sex robot.
One thing that they might tell us on is like, that could be the end of sex crime.
Yeah, absolutely.
That's like the Louis.
Like that is, they do need to make.
To make sex child robots?
Oh, yeah.
For people to fuck.
Yeah.
That is like, that seems like a no-brainer for me.
It's like they should have something to get those people to stop.
It's going to come, dude.
It's going to come.
Yeah.
It's going to come.
The robots are going to come.
Yeah.
you better tell your girls to start acting right.
That'd be so funny to see a pedophile just walking down the street with like a robot kid in his arms.
That is the other alternative.
He's like,
that's my boyfriend.
You're like, it's not,
doesn't have feeling.
I guess he can technically bring it to dates and stuff.
It's just weird.
You're like,
he's not committing a crime.
He's like bringing it to like,
neighborhood barbecues and stuff.
It's wild that instead of like,
instead of putting,
pouring enough money into scientific research to fix these pedophiles' brains,
we're like,
we're just going to go ahead and let them fuck.
Do you think you could fix their brains?
I don't think it's a chemical.
It's got to be, something in your brain is fucked out.
Yeah, but I think it's more like more of how you were brought up and like something with that.
So like it's something that happened in your life that got you to that, whether you were like beaten and now you want to take power.
It's like a weird, complicated thing.
But I don't think it's like a gene that they could be like, my father was a pedophile.
I'm a pedophile.
My son will be a pedophile.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It is also like, it's both, I think.
It's nature and nature.
Nature and nurture.
Yeah, like you ever see like these guys that are like, oh man.
No, never mind.
Let's skip it.
All right.
Oh, boy.
Skip that idea.
Nervous thought.
I don't think it's a gene, though.
I think it's like a you had a fucked up life that brought you there or your sociopath.
Because I think sociopaths, I think there's a mix.
I bet you there are pedophiles that are attracted to it and they are like, fuck, I can't do anything.
I feel empathy.
And then there's also your soci...
It's the same thing with a lot of things.
Like, I think it's similar to murder in the sense that, like, there are people that accidentally murder.
Not like, you accidentally fuck a kid, but they somehow get caught up in like a...
People do.
If people do, they don't check driver's license.
People do accidentally have sex and underage people.
But I'm saying, like, I think that, like, it's like thing that...
What kind of people do this, Michael, good?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Why are you gritting at me?
I don't know.
Did you ever stop that pedophile that we talked about?
Which one?
Oh, yeah.
I think I listened to this podcast.
Yeah, I literally told you to stop a pedophile.
And you've done nothing.
I don't have enough evidence against him.
This proves I listened to your podcast.
Thank you.
Appreciate that.
All the time.
Huge fan.
I don't think I have enough evidence to like just out this guy.
Yeah, but we talked about this is what girls do.
Just be like he's creepy.
So find the job that he works at.
And just send like an email.
Be like, hey, this guy's creepy.
You know that this guy is a pedophile?
No, no.
He's pretty sure.
Oh, so why would he do that?
No, because, well, he told me a bunch of examples of why.
The guy was just like doing weird stuff, like asking us to hang out with him.
And like, he was like 25.
We were like 10.
Really?
And then yeah, yeah.
And then like stuff like that.
And then like, sending me pictures of like Speedos and be like,
you should get one of these.
See what I'm saying?
For real?
Yeah, yeah.
Holy shit.
Yeah, I also had, I also had.
I see, I see, I say green light on at least send an email that way.
Yeah, I think you can send an email.
It's like, hey, this guy's creepy.
Keep an eye out.
Where does he work now?
Do you know where he works?
No, it's in a lot of his jobs.
He works at a speedo store?
A lot of his jobs were like,
He works at Speedo store.
Stuff like that.
Yeah, yeah, I don't know.
Whatever.
What's that guy's name again?
I'm not going to say his name because I'm not getting involved in this.
But, uh, yeah, no, I think a nice email being like, keep an eye out.
Well, we just talked about this months ago now.
Yeah, yeah.
I know.
I forgot.
I'm sorry.
I forgot about it.
You're the worst Marvel hero, bro.
Captain lets people get molested.
Yeah.
Yeah, you got to stop crying.
Well, I'll say we also had a guitar teacher.
He's a hero that procrastinates too much.
It's a superhero.
that sends emails.
I'm off to save the day.
Dear Speedos,
you have a child molester
in your business.
So,
fine and no,
I'm genuinely,
because I agree with you.
Like,
yeah,
we should definitely make sure
this guy's not fucking people.
Here,
a new thing.
I recently got in a,
yeah,
I recently got in a conversation
where this girl,
I know,
was like saying that
there's a transgender woman
that was at
asking her, like, private questions, right?
Like, invasive questions.
And she's not friends with this person.
Like, they just met.
And she's like, I was feeling uncomfortable.
And then she starts asking her, like, secretive things.
And I was like, yeah, you can't tell a trans woman secrets.
Like, that's the last person you want to tell a secret to.
Why?
Because if ever there's a person who can't keep something private to themselves, it's a trans person.
I don't think the bit works.
I see where you're going.
I don't, it doesn't make sense.
What's the logic behind it?
The logic is, all right, so you want to tell someone a secret if they could keep secrets, right?
Yeah.
So this person is like, I'm a woman inside.
Yeah.
But I was born a male.
Yeah.
So now.
I'm going to tell everybody.
That's the biggest secret you have.
That's not a secret, though.
No, I think that you should tell, but I'm just saying they've expressed poor judgment.
Hey, I've done bits of this podcast.
It didn't work out too, Joe.
I'm saying this happened.
I want to see how far he goes.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Well, no, I'm not saying it's...
I had this idea.
I thought it was a brilliant idea.
I don't think it's undoable.
I think it's workable, but like, it just had to be rephrased.
Because it's like...
Yeah.
Because you couldn't do set-up punch on the podcast.
You kind of had to explain it to it.
No, it's not a joke.
I literally just thought this yes, the other day.
I'm trying to think if I told the transgender person a secret.
You and never.
And they told someone, I'd be like, it's because they're transgender.
Always spreading rumors.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What would...
the invasive questions, just like...
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know. Now you're telling that person's secret.
Are you trans?
No, no, I'm not...
I can't keep secrets at all.
Yeah, yeah. I'm bad at it, too.
Yeah, yeah. Don't tell me anything.
You're trans.
I'm trans, yeah. Any secret
teller is a trans.
I'm non-binary. I've been saying it.
You are? I think so.
Yeah? Yeah, because it's like an idea, right?
Yeah, I... That stuff's confusing me.
Feeling. Because if non-binary, that makes sense
because I have seen, like, a woman with a beer.
And I'm like, that makes sense.
Like, you have a penis, but you want to wear a lipstick.
I was like, that's not male or female.
You know what I mean?
Because you're kind of merging with both.
I was like, I get that.
Or like a woman who like shaves her head and dresses like a male.
But she's like, I'm not a male.
I have a vagina.
I'm like, I get how that's like sort of endrogynous, non-binary stuff.
But then there is the occasional dude who will just like paint his fingernails.
And he's like, I'm not binary.
And I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I believe.
It's like, there's like there's a reason that that person who's trained.
Like, you know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's, yeah.
I believe 100%.
I don't know anything about this stuff.
I should ask these people instead of just like taking a view.
No, I believe 100% in trans people.
I do.
And like,
there's a respect there because like you're really like taking a step out into society
to be like, no.
You're going nose deep into the ass.
Non-binary.
I've met a lot of,
they're always young and they come from very liberal cities.
And like, I'm like, are you non-binary?
Are you trying to be interesting right now?
There's only one non-binary I've ever met where I was like,
I believe that this is non-binary.
this person, it was something
about their eyes.
Non-binary eyes.
You're like, you're not a man or woman.
No, it was weird.
But also, like, what is, what is it?
I don't know.
I don't know this stuff. So it's hard, because I'm like,
because non-binary, what about those people that one day
they're a man and one day they're a woman?
Because I was like that.
That's gender fluid, non-binary.
That's different. Okay.
No, that's non-binary.
But it's gender fluid. It's a different thing.
No, it's the same thing. Non-binary people are
gender fluid.
But what if you're not flowing between one or the other,
you're just in the middle.
Because it's the spectrum, right?
What do you mean?
So there's like very feminine, there's hypermasculine.
Okay.
There's people that are in between.
Me.
Yeah, Joe over here.
Feminine.
Mascular.
I'm the most masculine guy, you know.
Yeah, you copy him out.
But both of you guys are very dudeish.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't have feminine dudes in this podcast.
No, I'm kidding.
I have plenty.
Do you have feminine dudes here?
Yeah, of course.
Whatever.
We're not really about.
Who do you think is most feminine of our friends?
Of everyone in that group chat?
PJ Francis, for sure.
He's been on the mustache.
It's not.
Yeah, but he paints his nails
Yeah, he does.
He does now?
He's also bad at
Tell, like, keeping secrets.
Does that make some?
No, he keeps secrets.
We're better wrap up, by the way.
This is horrible.
We got to fucking hit the shit with gas.
All right, all right, all right.
I don't want to out the most feminine person.
That's true.
I don't want to tell everyone that's Eli.
Yo, it's so Eli.
Eli is.
He's an underwear model, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's as gay as it gets.
He's an underwear model?
He sends you pictures of him and his underwear?
No, he told me he was an underwear model.
Well, there's also bisexual...
He said he wore another man's underwear
to be an underwear model.
I don't know.
He did that.
Eli is gayer than...
You're bad at keeping secrets.
I can't do it.
Eli is gayer than Graham and Graham's bisexual.
You know what I mean?
Like, it's just a different thing.
Like, Eli doesn't fuck dudes, but he's gay.
Like, he's more...
Yeah.
What's the last subject?
It's so hot in here.
Okay, full stance on fucking Sesame Park.
Oh, yeah, dude.
Full circle.
Fuck Sesame Park.
Or, or...
not. No, you gotta take a hard
stance on this.
I'm, I
gotta finish watching the documentary.
You fucking push. You take a stand for your people.
Which are your people?
You're Albanian, so you don't, you're not really black or white.
Yeah, I'm for the people at the park.
No, you get, which people?
Yeah, which ones? The ones who did not
get their hands touched. I'm fully on board with, let's
really put a microscope on this guy.
who plays Bert or whatever.
Yeah, yeah.
Let's follow him around tally.
How many blacks has he high-fived?
How many whites?
You've been an Excel spreadsheet of different races.
He's like, fist-pumped a Chinese guy.
On Monday, he was pretty good.
Tuesday is a problem.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think the people who work at Sesame Park
and the mascot outfits need to go under training
to touch every child.
Based on all races.
You need to touch all of them.
Never not touch a child.
Even if they're not putting their hand out, make sure you touch them.
Yeah.
Anyone with those positions, they should really be taken over by the robots.
That should just be a robot job.
Yeah, that's why.
Because my chunky cheese, they had a mechanical guy.
You can't work with kids anymore.
That's a great point.
Robots should take, yeah, the child bear.
Robots aren't going to fuck the kids.
They're never going to.
We got all twisted.
We say the pedophiles need the robots, but really the kids need the robots.
Need the robots.
Yeah.
not get fucked by the pet.
Oh my God, this is genius.
Yeah, school teacher?
Sorry.
Yeah, I'm going to...
It's tough.
It is tough to be excited around a kid.
Yeah, yeah.
Because they're super boring.
They're so...
Why'd you say it like that?
Like, what?
Boring.
It's tough to be like, hey, what's up kids that aren't my kids?
Oh, okay.
I thought you were bragging about how you don't get excited.
It's actually excited around kids.
No, they have horrible stories.
They go nowhere.
They're like little women.
Yeah.
Yeah, they're annoying as fuck.
Yeah, our Chucky Cheese, I remember, had a robotic Chucky Cheese guy.
And, like, occasionally the other guy would come out.
But, like, most of the time, they'd be the robotic one.
They would just be kind of like...
I like when they had the whole concert of the robot people.
I've seen that.
Chuckie Cheese?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
The whole group of people...
It is going to be fucking weird, dude, to ever be in a world where it's like...
You're just in rooms and it's like 60% robot and shit.
Yeah.
I mean, not my room.
I mean, not my room's, but...
Yeah.
Do you think they could get offended?
robots? No, I think they're so
emotionless. No, that was the thing
I heard, I don't know where I heard it, but like
eventually there's going to be like a civil rights
movement for robots because we're treating
them like slaves and they're going to be like more human.
Yeah, yeah, dude, that's true. I don't think robots will
feel that way, but I think people will feel
that way. Yeah, yeah. People will be like, we need
to treat the robots better.
Well, it'll be like
the new animal rights. There'll be
robot rights. Yeah, yeah. But there
should be because. Animal rights.
Animal rights make sense, and I really, like, I'll be honest.
Like, I totally see where vegans are coming from.
Like, I'm not vegan, but I'm like, dude, I get it.
Like, like, the only reason I don't agree with it is because a lot of times in, like,
the manufacturing of, like, vegan foods, like, there's animals are still getting killed.
Yeah, they're still getting killed.
But I do totally understand the concept of, like, yeah, if we could, like,
occasionally have plants here and there and mix it up a little bit and not be like,
because it is bad, some of these, the factory farming with, like, you know what I mean?
Like, I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about.
I'm sure peeing points I heard other people saying.
but yeah.
I don't know.
Fuck Sesame Park.
All right.
Fuck Sesame Park?
Yeah.
I'm Sesame Park strong.
I'm not going anymore.
What are you?
I think that we should really
fucking keep our eyes out.
I guarantee you,
it's Sesame Park
there's working pedophiles right now.
I would kind of agree with that.
Was that a gunshot?
No.
Okay.
We're fine.
All right.
Just the fucking bullet flies.
No, we're good.
All right, anything you guys want to promote?
I'm going to be in upstate New York this weekend.
Saturday, T.J. Francis and me
are going to be at Hurleyville, New York.
Okay, sweet. Fuck you. I hope there
isn't a Sesame Park there because I'm not going.
Yeah. I doubt
there will be a full Sesame Park
in a different city. Very unlikely.
Yeah, just catch me in New York. When is this
coming out? I don't know.
Check out the last show
NYC. We're on Instagram,
Twitter, and my Instagram is
Joe Not Famous, Twitter, Joe Not Famous.
Everything. Oh, hell yeah.
