Morning Good - Stand Your Ground - Episode 115

Episode Date: September 14, 2022

Thanks to Kevin McGloin for coming on the show again and to Zuri Durham for joining us for the first time. Check both of these guys out online at their links below, and see if you can catch the show in NYC they co-produce, Prohibition Comedy.Kevin is on Instagram @kevinmcgloin and Zuri is as well @zuri_sure.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michael_good1125 and on Twitter @agoodmichaelThis podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax

Thanks for the F-Shack. Love Dirty Mike and the Boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They called the podcast? Morning. I love that.

Yeah, it's me with the boner on the front. Welcome to morning. We're here with Zuri Durham. Did I nail it? Yes, sir. All right, sweet. And Kevin McLean. Did I nail that?

You did. Yes. So I can know somebody's name. And then the second I have to say, and I fucking forget it every time. That's me right. Do you do that hosting? I'm the worst host and I'm the worst.

When people book me to host, I'll literally be like, so, can you host? I'm like, absolutely. And I literally is such a big move. But I'll be like, before I get on stage, by the way, I'm just not really good. Yeah. And I was like, I need the money right now.

But yeah, yeah. What's your, do you have a worst hosting story moment? Oh, I got a, I got a fucking bad one. I love to hear it. Bad one. Yeah. I doubt, I doubt mine's as bad because the way you're saying it. Okay.

I might have hyped it up too much, but you go first. No, this wasn't even that big of a deal. I was hosting one time, and this, uh, the comic that was next was in the room. And he had, like, legitimate credits. It's done like Comedy Central, Conan, a bunch of stuff. And I don't know how to pronounce his name. So I just look at a different comic. I just bring up a completely different comic.

And I just told him, I was like, dude, I'm so sorry. I didn't, you were, I didn't even realize you were here. I thought you left the room and all this stuff. And I have no idea how this is that. But I literally was like, yeah, no, I was looking at it. I practiced his name. like 10 times. And then I was like,

because you do, when you're hosting, the first comics, the hardest, because you do your whole set. Right. Yeah. The next comics are so easy

because you're like, all right, I have three minutes in between. Like, I'm about to go on stage. Okay, sweet. This is your name, blah,

blah, let's go up and do it. But when you're like, do all your jokes, especially because I was flailing, like, I was bombing so hard. It was like at 6 o'clock at the comedy shop. And it's like, these people don't want to be here.

The fan is blowing hard. Yeah, it's horrible. And then I'm like, my hosting said I was just, I was just regretting my whole life in comedy. And then I'm like, and I got to bring up, and now you're a comic. And I was like, uh, uh, is it? And Malia Simon was next. Yeah.

After him. And I was like, you know, for Malia Simon. Yeah. I can see. I'm like, I could nail Malia Simon. Yeah. Yeah. And, uh, not nail her, but you get them.

Yeah. Yeah. All right. But that was a sentence. Yeah. But, uh, easily. I'm like slightly. I'm like, so even when I was doing the last podcast, I'm like,

justifying everything. thing. Like, I'm like, oh, actually, by fucking anxiety. I'm like, overthinking everything. Malia, I don't think I could bang you and I have a girlfriend. Nice try, though. But, yeah, and then I just, yeah, but that's, that's not even terrible. It's just like, it's just like, that's wrong person. I could just tell, like, that was kind of smooth, though, because you didn't like, you weren't just like, fuck, what's your name and, and brought him up really. Yeah, that was never the mood. That was honestly, that was pretty good. You knew she was in there. She was ready to go. All right. So, so I'm hosting. Okay, we have, um, you're going to know

where this is going right when I say the name, but we had Jordan. Rock on the show. Oh, shit. Okay. Okay, we're good. I just make sure it's pick it up. All right. Yeah. So Jordan Rock, uh, for people that don't know, uh, Chris Rock's younger brother. So there's, uh, several Rock brothers that do comedy, right? You got, Duane the Rock, Tony, Jordan, you know, Chris, obviously. And, um, you said somebody else. Dwayne the Rock, Johnson. Oh, yeah. Yeah, there you go. He does everything. Yeah. He's a moan, but they're related. Yeah. Yeah. Somehow. Um, so, um, I'm supposed to bring him up. And, um, um, um, I'm supposed to bring him up. And, I'm telling myself the entire time, dude, just don't say Chris.

You fucking, just don't say Chris Rock. Oh, this is bad. This is, you know. This is bad. Ladies and gentlemen, he's been on so-and-so. Guys, right now, show some love for Tony Rock. And just fucking, of course the people don't know. They're like, oh, yeah, whatever.

I mean, you know, what's wrong with that? Huh? I think it was Jordan Rock that I was supposed to. Oh. I thought, okay, that's bad, but that's not as bad as saying, He'd go for Chris Rock. Yeah, that would have been. And they're like, who that is this guy?

The only saving grace was that they didn't, they didn't know who Tony was either. Yeah, it was a bunch of comedy crowd. White girls. It was just a bunch of white girls. What'd he say? So he's hesitant. I say it. I don't realize it at first for a split second.

He's hesitant to come on stage. I can see him from the side of my eye. And I go, oh, my gosh. I fuck that up. And so he's like slowly walking on stage. He's just looking at me. And he's like, like, with his like teeth like clenched. He's like, like,

that's not my name. I'm like, oh, God. And Kev did the walk of shame? Back to the green room. It's this long, dark hallway into the green room, and everybody knew it happened.

He brought his, like, boy with him, too. And he was just like, yo, really? I was like, dude, I don't know. And I wish I had the fucking balls when I went back on stage and say, hey, keep it going for Jordan Rock. Does just go up there, double down,

be like, hey, keep it going for Tony Rock. Fuck, get my ass feet on stage. That would have been great. Also, like, not to be a dick, but like... It's had to have happened before. Yeah. At least once or twice. Yeah.

And it's like, if you call me Matthew, I don't give a shit, whatever. Fucking, it's, my name is not that important. It's like, and it's also like, I don't know, it's like, I'm sure that's years of following in the shadows of Chris Rock. Like, that's the issue. Yeah. No, and, and, and to be fair, like, afterwards, he was, he was cool about it. Like, he wasn't, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. He shrugged it off. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

After I showed, I was contrite. He was like, yeah. Dude, that whole family is just comics. Like, uh, Gerard or Sharad Smalls is,

you know, it's his cousin, right? Oh, for real. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Actually,

the Rock Johnson. No, no, no, like, actually his cousin. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Speaking to Dway

the Rock Johnson, we were walking by Madame Tusses last night, or we were driving by there because my buddy lives in, uh, Times Square. Or like,

hell's kitchen. I was thinking, like, I don't know why I love the idea of somebody running a scheme. Like, dude, There's like a guy running like a thing where you could like fuck Madonna. Yeah, yeah. Like I'm weird.

I'm surprised sex dolls don't like, people don't do that like a Madonna sex doll. Because like sex dolls are always just like, oh, some random girl. That's a big, that's a big, it's a big, it's a big, she likes, she likes the, she likes the big, the big, yeah. Yeah, she's like openly talked about it. She had two pox, man. And she's 67, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So old is shit.

There's no way I would do any damage to Madonna. No, no. There's, yeah. Would you still smash, though? Madonna? I got a girlfriend. I love that. This is me obsessing every fucking time.

If I was single, of course, I'd fuck Madonna. But, like, I don't think, uh, I think she could probably be on her phone and, like, not even notice because I'm like, I don't know. Actually, I don't know what your tolerance is with vagina. Because everybody says it retracts. Like, it goes in, like, it, uh, if you stretch it out, it can go back. It's like a, like a rubber band. You know, all right.

So I heard, I heard that. Yeah, I mean, yeah, she's, it's been too much. It's been too much of ballplayers. rappers, Def Jam stars. Who do you think her or Chris Jenner like fucking has really had it pounded in like that? Madonna. Madonna. Madonna was a sex

symbol in like the 80s. So like she's just I bet you very few women have had as much sex as Madonna. Yeah. Like at that level like pop star like she was like the I want to say like the white Beyonce I guess. Yeah. Yeah. And she also kind of like Chris Chris. Chris definitely fucked OJ

though. Definitely. Definitely. She definitely got the juice. Definitely. I feel like OJ, that's a... But also, Madonna's fucked Dennis Rodman. Ooh, that's a pounding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a pounding.

Yeah, exactly. Because it's also like, I feel like if you're a bigger dude, you're not like, I don't know why. I picture of an athlete, I feel like he's probably just like really giving it to her. Because he's got... He's got speed, he's got endurance. He's got like, he's a professional.

It's the Kobe thing. Some people were like, he didn't, like, do it. he is just like he's just the dick was too crazy like it was he's probably got a big dick and he's a fucking athlete full of testosterone I feel like you know

yeah yeah yeah I don't stand by that well well I do stand by seven seamers in the pussy that's a little too much yeah I'm just yeah wait what is this I mean Tyson too Mike Tyson's rape case I know nothing about it

oh Kobe's rape case let's get into it oh she was talking about this yeah I know all I knew is like that theory that like, come on, like, he just probably, you know, gave it to it. But yeah, it's a thing. It's impossible. Well, no, Mike has that edge to him where I could believe that he might have done something like that. Well, because he also beat up like five hookers one time when he was speedballing. I literally talked about this in the last episode, but wait, wait, what? He beat up, he beat up like five hookers when he was just like speedballing doing coke and heroin together.

He like, in his prime. It was this in his prime? Yes, like, beat up like five hookers, which was like crazy. You see me. Okay, but what were they wearing? Yeah. I never have for just like fighting a wood Yeah, I have no I have no idea That's got to be a crazy Like

I don't know Because like I've never gotten in a coke fight But I assume Your energy's going And you're like And mixing that with like heroin I don't know how that all works

Oh that's different Yeah But the heroin slows you down Yeah Yeah so it's like I hear PCP and angel dust Like that

Is angel dust Okay That shit This is the morning We know drugs here So Florida Yeah

Do a little research Yeah, because it gets your shit right there. Yeah. But I hear that, that like keeps people like going. Yeah. Yeah. So I've done ketamine, which is like in the same, it's not the same at all, but it's like they're technically, so the whole thing about PCP, it was

originally used as an animal tranquilizer. So because what it does is it's an anesthetic so it makes you not feel like pain. Yeah. I used it for COVID treatment. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Storting fucking beer. But it makes

you not feel pain. So like you fucking like, so, but the animals were kind of going nuts, so they stopped doing it, and they invented ketamine to replace PCP, but they apparently have similar effects in a sense, but like everybody knows mode PCB, the hallucinations are insane. I mean, also, ketamine hallucinations are

apparently out of bot. Like, I've done ketamine, but I've never like hallucinated on it, but I hear you get really silent. You just stop talk. Yeah. How's your body feel? I like a lot. So I think it's like similar to like MDMA and like the euphoric sense, but it's more nilis.

numbing instead of stimulating. So everything looks similar, doesn't emanate, like not like slightly enhanced. Like not to the point of mushrooms where it's like as vibrant. But have you guys ever taken Molly? No. No. So Molly, everything like looks kind of like slightly better. Like you're a little bit like just enhanced vision.

So like it's like that. And then you feel kind of like numb. But you also you feel it's a little bit like alcohol, but you're also kind of like lighter. Instead of being heavy, you're kind of like, oh, I got an extra. Do black people do Molly? there was a point in time recently but I think it wasn't for a while

like you're really up on it yeah yeah he knew he knew more than me yeah well for me like five years ago right

yeah because I feel like the rappers were really pushing that trend for a while for like a couple like four or five years I'm sweating yeah so 2013 to like 2017 yeah

but I feel like now it's kind of died out where that's not really the like you're not going to Molly so much at least like rappers aren't at least like black black guy aren't going to Molly.

Yeah, because also, it's also a weird thing where, like, somebody, I think Hannibal Burr's had a joke about it because it's so funny that, like, rap is, like, the most hardcore shit, but then you're talking about doing the most, like, touchy-feely drug. Because, like, we do Molly, you're like, I love everybody. And it's, like, weird that, like, the rappers were, like, like, it's opposing things, almost. Yeah. Trying to shoot somebody.

Yeah. If I'm being honest, like, I'm not as versed into drugs as you. Like, I just did Coke, like, this calendar year, right? Did you like it? I actually did. I ain't going to lie. I ain't going to lie. But not enough where I would go back to it consistently.

Right. If I was in a social, I just admitted to being a Coke head. Was it what you expected? Like, because I remember playing GTA Vice City and the fucking screen turns purple and you can't drive. I feel like if on Coke, I could probably drive like very well. Yeah, probably better. Better, yeah. It felt like, it felt like, it felt good.

I mean, the one thing that was true, it was like, you have to keep doing it. Like, people, people always say that and you're like, oh, whatever, but it really is. Yeah, last 15 to 20 minutes, so I would definitely say that, but it was, it was dope. Like, the game was on. I was at the bar. I'm not going to say who I was with. It was a certain white comic that, you know, I ain't going, nah, I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. But, yeah, yeah. You liked it, though.

Yeah, it was calm. I think it's overrated. I think it's not. A lot of people say that. but it's like, I don't know though. Not enough for me to go back to like to be a regular drug. That's what it is for me. Like I can't, that's not mine. I think when you look at the total body of work, right, it's overrated. You go, oh, 15 minutes, whatever. It's a sweet 15 minutes though.

You feel fucking good. And it's not like euphoric. It's just like I feel like this is, this. I think it's a little euphoric. Like if you're drunk, but it's like, I feel like it snaps you back into like, like, if you're drinking, it's great for like day drinking. Which I don't really do anymore because it's, a stand-up, but it's like if you're day-drinking all day,

and then you're like, all right, well, we've got to make it out tonight. Do cocaine, you'll make it. I think any conversation, too, becomes interesting. Yo, yo. Yeah. That's fucking true. I almost bought my friend Coke last night so he could talk about the CIA. So he, this guy, last time I saw him do Coke,

he literally, we were at the beach and he's like, come on, man. He's like, stay up with me and talk. I'm like, I don't want to talk. I'm like, dude, just stay up me and talk. I'm just going to do a little bit of Coke. And he takes a line, he goes, the thing they don't want to let you know about the CIA. goes out for like 20 minutes.

And I was like, because I don't do Coke anymore. I was like, hell yeah. The last night I was like trying to score Coke for him because I'm like, dude, I want to hear about this. Yeah. You guys do. Right. I like the environment of it.

So here's the thing about Parkland. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, I got to fucking argue with my mom last week defending Alex Jones. It was the funniest thing in the world. I'm just like yelling at my mom. It's my whole life.

She's like, he's a monster. I'm like, he thought it was fake. Oh, man. Do you know Nick Mullen? Yeah, he has a really good thing. Oh, awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'll tune in, I tune in like once a week to end, but we're just like see what's going on it.

You can't listen that long because he repeats a lot of the same week. Yeah. Not loyal enough. I'm buying the products, okay? I'm buying the supplements he promotes. Dude, they're so funny. He's like, you want to keep the testosterone up. They're trying to ruin the American family.

So you want to keep your wife happy. You take this product. Oh. Somebody told me he had a big skin. We have a cup. of Ronald Reagan's tears. I like Alan Jones, man. I like him.

It's just funny. It's cool. Also, though, you can have fucked up, you could say fucked up crazy things. And it's fine. It's fine. Yeah, because everybody's like fucking, hey, free speech, man.

But like, you know, come on. You let me fucking, whatever. We all say fucked up shit. Well, because we all have wild thoughts. Like, I have OCD. And, like, so what it is is, like, I have this thing called harm OCD.

So most people, OCD, or not most people, Some people, you think of it with washing hands, right? So, like, you'll wash your hands ten times. The reason they're doing that is because they have a mental image of them, like, getting AIDS or something like that. So you have this thing called an intrusive thought. Actually, AIDS? Yes. Like, that's a lot of people that OECD think they are going to catch AIDS.

So it looks like it's simple. They're just washing their hands. But really, they're doing a pattern of behavior to reduce anxiety, but it's only feeding the OCD. Do they stay away from gay bars, too? This is my nephew, Steve. He's a homosexual. I got to go. I gotta go to the bathroom and wash my hands.

Dude, one of my friends last night, a homeless guy came up to him with blood on his hands. He shook my friend's hand. What? And then goes, what the fuck? And he's covered... At first I thought my friend was just grossed out by touching a homeless guy.

I was like, easy, bro. It's not that big of a deal. He goes, the guy's hand was bleeding. And he's trying to get, like, he asked his friend if he had tape, to tape his hands up. He's like, first time we're out at a bar. No one just has duct tape.

Yeah, but like, that is the only time. He's like, I'll be fine. I'm like, dude, I would be scared. Yeah. My buddy did blow off a homeless man's hand. What? Yeah. Because, like, if anybody has AIDS

that somebody's doing intervenous drug, you know what I mean? It's like, if you're shooting up drugs, that's like a very good way to get AIDS from my understanding. Right.

Yeah. I'm learning a lot about drugs today. Just more and more and more. Yeah. It's dad and butts, like, if you're, if you're having unprotected

butt sex and doing interview as drugs, I feel like that will, yeah, protected butt sex creates diseases. Like, it just, it's just somehow. What are you trying to say? Yeah. What are you trying to say?

How are you, how are you focus? Nothing should keep it clean. I'm trying to work in this business. Nothing wrong with it. But, you know, the monkey pox thing, it's kind of where that tape is from. Well, it's because the tear. It's the same with AIDS.

The reason AIDS, I, no idea if this is true or not. I could be talking out of my ass, which is a great fun. No, but buttholes, they rip and there's blood involved. So that's why AIDS gets happens. Like, it's literally because that and, yeah. Ah, okay. So, like, but apparently. What about the bloody snatches, though?

I think it's really hard for women to catch AIDS. That's fucked up. Apparently, it's like almost impossible. By the way, it's based in nothing besides what I've heard. God's looking out. No, but I gotta stop. But AIDS is so unfair. God likes lesbians.

It's just hot. Yeah. Yeah. Magic Johnson. Like, why do I give it to Magic Johnson? Why? Well, a lot, I mean, a lot of things that he had to have. He had.

They said, Arsenio Hall. That was the rumor that him and Arsenio Hall were like boyfriends or some shit. Secret boyfriends. Magic, I still want Laker tickets, so, you know, don't cancel me, bro.

I'm just saying, sorry. Yeah, no, it's, yeah. But that's the thing. Arsenio Hall, because they're best friends. Only memory I have Arsenio Hall is when Tyson got, yeah. Yeah. You don't have AIDS to you.

He's like, no. He gave it to me good. Tyson got pissed at him. For what? What do you say? He brought up the. rape. He was like, he was so I'm sorry, it's funny to rape, get accused of rape and then be like,

don't bring it up. Yeah. How could you ever? I know, but I will say this, though. He was plug in his, uh, when he had that one man HBO show that he was doing for a while. And he was about to plug it, right? The interview was done. And Arsenia was like, yeah, so, uh, you know, before I plug the show and all that and sent everybody off on their way. So, like, talk about the, uh, the rape conviction. Oh, God. Yeah, to be fair, that's tough. That's a tough. Yeah. It's like, you act like a nice motherfucker backstage, but like all this shit.

Really a piece of shit. Yeah, that's the thing you got to do immediately up front. Like, if I'm going to have you on the show, we're talking about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, fact, yeah. Because you're already, he's already getting paid probably to come on there or something. Yeah. It's like, you're already giving him a platform. So just admit you support him or not.

Yeah. It's not necessarily support him, but it's like, you know what I mean? Like, that's a weird thing to do. Be like, everything's cool. And then last minute, just so people don't get mad at me. What's about the rain? What about the white chicken? Yeah, no.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, I don't know. We're talking about, I mean, he gets to just smokes a lot of weed now and levels him out and stuff. He has a good podcast. He's in a wheelchair.

You guys see that? Mike Tyson? Yes. People caught pictures of him in the airport. He's got to, like, they were taking them through a wheelchair. And it's, apparently it's, like, not a big deal. Like, it's back problems. But he said recently that he thinks he's going to die soon for some reason.

And he's smoking so much. InfoWorse. InfoWorse sees that. They go, fuck. and they go vaccine. Wait, so, did you actually hear that on Info Wars? Yeah, no, actually. For real?

Because Tyson was like, at one point, not the CTE and the cocaine. Yeah. And the constant jabs to the head. Right, right. No, none of that, none of that, but the jab. The jab isn't going to do it. Yeah. I mean, you know.

Yeah, I don't know what. I definitely don't think I got it from the vaccine, but I'm, like, sick all the time now, dude. I bought a one-hitter last night. You ever smoked pot out of a one-hitter? Yeah, I might as well have just drank in class, dude. My throat is so fucked today. Yo, look, as an avid weed smoker, I can't do the one-hitter thing.

Like, it's horrible, yeah. It's just not, I don't know how people do it, but it's not my wave, man. I can't get down with it. Just can't do it. It's convenient to smoke in public with, but it's like, dude, it's such a fuck. It's so bad for your throat. Yeah, I'd rather just take pulls, like nice portion of pools than that. You guys ever smoke out of an apple?

No. I've done a can, no. I haven't, no. You have a can? Yeah, smart water bottle. Water bottles, yeah. When I was a kid, I would just cover stuff in tin foil and plastic, and I have no idea what's bad for you or not.

And I just inhaled probably the worst shit. Because it's like, we, like, tin. I didn't know idea that smoking tinfoil is very bad for you. I was like, the crackheads do. It should be fine. It's the most Florida shit ever. Yeah, dude. I had no idea.

Oh, you're from Florida, Florida. Which part, which part? So Winter Park, it's a suburb of Orlando. Oh, okay, okay. Yes, I grew up in Orlando. Class. Oh, yeah. Through the last episode, I was doing with James on his

I'm just defending how I grew up like not too rich but I was like parents had money but we weren't loaded though don't hate me I used to live there that's why I used to live in Port Charlotte Oh shit oh yeah yeah did you like it? It was dope it was dope it was great See I appreciate that very quiet

A lot of people hate Florida but I'm like also like if you have any access to water then it's a great Like even a canoe bro it's like if you can hop on a canoe And canoe through like listen like where I grew up in Florida It's very swampy but it's kind of nice It's like the swamp, it's disgusting, but it's kind of beautiful. Like, if you look at all like the Spanish moss and like the sun setting on like the lake, it's kind of like, I could take some phenomenal pictures of that. But when it's like outside of like a, I don't know, it's like there's also a lot of it.

It's just like a random shopping center with like, you know, a target. And like anything else, you're like, oh, then the people here are kind of. Yeah. But it's like anywhere, man. It's like, I don't know. It's like. Do you feel like Florida gets too much of a bad rap? 100%.

But then also. Like, it's so bad. Because we all see the news stories and we're like, this can't be real. Yeah, yeah. We're like, nope, this can't be real. This has to be done. The thing is, though, there's no way that, like, fucking Albuquerque, New Mexico and, like, all these other, you know, I'm not saying Florida's a shit state. Dude, you're not going to offend me with anything.

No, no, no, but I, I, I like, I like Florida. We let it fly. I like Florida. So, but there's, there are shitty states in, in the U.S., and you're telling me there's not a similar amount. of stories of similar nature happening, but I think it's just become a meme, like, oh, Florida. Also, we have different laws with police records.

So the, what's it called? The news has access to police records way easier in Florida than, like, any other states. That's why they can coast that stuff. In high school, we'd always have, like, the Tallahassee mugshots or in college. So, like, when you get arrested, you'd be in, like, you'd be in Tallahassee mugshots.

So online, they would just put your mugshot. And they used to have, I know, I know some... Do you have one? What's up? No, I never been arrested. But some places would have this shit Where it's like Like I have family It lives in Tennessee And they have like a magazine

That comes out every week And it's all the rest in that county So like you literally walk into the fucking gas station And you see your face on the fucking Like printed out That's real local Yeah I like that

I like that I like that It's got like ah You couldn't even lift down your shame You just got to stand in the shame Like nope Nope You're a criminal

You're a criminal today Yeah Nope You're a criminal Nope Yeah. But it's also people forget it's a ginormous state. It's like it's one of the highest population states.

It's as far as distance is ginormous. Didn't shut down. COVID numbers didn't change. DeSantis 2020. Okay. And look, Florida got that stand your ground law. That is low key. What is that?

Staying your ground. Yeah, what is that? It's like the Trayvon Martin shit, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Basically, where it's how like Trayvon got killed. as crazy as that law is, more and more as time goes by, I kind of like that law.

Like, the older I get, as fucked up as that sounds, the white and that half Asian guy are like, I'm not, you're leaning back, moving yourself out of frame right now. And that's so crazy to say,

but the older I get, and when you just live in New York and you see all these crazy motherfuckers, I wouldn't be mad if New York, had a law like that. There's probably too many people in this city. Yeah. There's very too many people.

I feel like the homeless here, though, they only attack Asian people. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's, nah, nah,

no. White women get it too. I think of them. Yeah, my girlfriend's had some crazy. Well, I do that too. That's fair.

Yeah. I understand that. But I also, I hear Portland, sorry to cut you up, but I hear Portland homeless. All I've heard is, they just attack you.

Really? That was my experience at all. I've been there. Really? Okay. I've heard, I heard bad things. they just, they're crazy.

There's a ton of... The Kensington, Philly homeless, they're bad too, but they're just like incapacitated all the time. Yeah, I can see. I mean, if you got a good heroin scene, you probably got Loki homeless guys. I have no problem at all with the heroin homeless. Dossile homeless.

Yes, they're fucking chilling. Yeah, yeah. It's the meth and the crack that gets a little wild. But I can get what you're saying, because like, I think a lot of laws, so you could have a loophole law where you get out of something because of the law, but that doesn't mean that the law's bet,

but you just, you just had a crazy lawyer. Like for me with their whole, like, Trevon shit, what made it wrong on George's part is you followed him home, then you stood your ground. That don't make no sense to me. You can't follow somebody home and then stand your ground. Like, he's sitting his ground

against you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, so, like, that's where I think, like, he was just a dickhead for that. Yeah, exactly. This is you're trying to get out of what you Yeah, exactly. Like, I got to get the black community back. That's the funny. That's the funny. Black people also worry about being in trouble

with the black community. Yeah, it's like, dude, I had a little person strip rod. worried about getting trouble with a little person community. Like, it's like, it's everybody's like, yeah, yeah, who else? Yeah, you gotta keep your, keep your base. But you know, all I'm saying is that law wouldn't be too bad. Like, you got kids, yeah, yeah, something like that. The older you get, you live your

life, it's like, I want to stand my ground a little bit. Yeah. Florida's, you know, you gotta give them credit. They're on on par with some things, like the school stuff. What's up? Don't take a? Yeah. You're more, I'm a So against it, bro. See, my opinion with that is I think all the kids have gay porn on their iPhones. So I'm like, there's no way.

Whoa, whoa, what? So it's like... You can get it, but you're saying they, there's a lot of... You can't watch gay porn? No, that's not the law. In Florida was the law. It's supposed to be that... I don't fully understand it at all.

I don't understand anything. All right, all right. I'll give you the both sides of it. Okay, so the liberal side of it, they try to say that they're just banning T-EU. and students from saying gay and other LGBTQ stuff in the classroom, like they're saying they're just like oppressing it. It doesn't exist. It doesn't exist. They're trying.

The conservative side of it is that the law is saying that like you teachers can't have gay and like trans stuff in the agenda of what they're teaching in the classroom. So there can't be like, hey, today we're going to learn about why your dad's wearing a dress. or something like that. Okay. So they're trying to say, like, just stick to the fucking academics. That's the first thing I would ask somebody. Why is my dad wearing a dress? I can't answer.

Yeah. But I get both sides of it. But I also heard there's some part of the bill that they have to out kids or something like that. That's crazy. Oh, I saw a bit about that. I don't know if it's true, though. Yeah, I don't know.

That's true for real? I don't know. It's Tim Dillon? Yeah. It was Tim Dillon, right? Yeah, yeah. Okay. What's even getting outed, though, in high school or middle school for being gay?

Because everybody's calling everybody gay. Everybody's outing each other even if they're not gay. They're like, you're gay, you're gay. Yeah. I mean, the kids, determine if you're gay or not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's crazy.

Like, back then, we didn't have any thought about calling somebody gay because everything was gay. You just said, oh, that's gay. Like, oh, that's gay, bro. Oh, that's gay. Like, you just said it. Like, it wasn't even a... Yeah.

And now I think it's coming back in a way because... It is... Because it's gone full 360 because people are like, oh, it's gay. And they're like, what are you homophobic? No, it's 22. I'm not homophobic. Yeah.

I'm just saying this. It's like almost, it's almost like second nature to assume a lot of people aren't homophobic. You know what I mean? It's like, I know homophobia is still out there. But like at the same time, I'll be like, nah, dude, that's gay. And people are like, you have a problem with gay. I'm like, and I'm like, this has nothing to do with it. Yeah. Yeah. I also think it's making a comeback because like it's almost more fun to say now. Back then, everyone was saying it all the time is kind of overkill. But now if you just drop in a nice, oh, dude, that's gay. It's funny. It's funny again. It's like a backhanded thing. It's funny because it's kind of like, what did you say? Yeah, yeah. But, yeah, I'm so sorry, gay community. I'm gonna have a gay guy on next episode. I've never intentionally done that,

but I've like looked at episodes and I'm like, oh, it looks like I said something about Mexican. Have you had a good amount of gay comics on the podcast? I thought like one. Oh, God, that's... I gotta get those numbers up. I gotta go wash my hands now.

Yeah. Dude, that's what the fucking... that's what the 80s apparently was like. People were like scared of gay people. Like hobophobia from my understanding was like, people were like, dude, you could smell AIDS off somebody. Like, they just didn't know. Kiss somebody, get AIDS.

It was crazy. Yeah. I mean, I still would be uncomfortable sharing a joint with somebody that had AIDS. And I don't know if that makes me AIDS phobic. Currently right now, like, yeah. Oh, yeah. No shot, dude. No shot.

Because in my mind, I'm like, what if you had a cut on your lip and I had it? I don't know how it works. Right, right. I mean, so the monkey pox thing, like, to a much lesser degree, right? But I remember, you know, I was, news was breaking out about it, about it. Saw some, like, you know, scary pictures of people with, like, these horrible rashes. And I told my, my girlfriend, like, yo, you know, she's got a couple gay friends. They're, you know, very touchy and stuff.

Like, let's, you know, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, we're making a, making a damn point. We're making a damn point right now. Why is that bad? But like with COVID stuff, it's like, all right, no, be safe. Take the precautions. Just saying, just saying. To be fair? You're a Florida, man.

You should back me up here. Okay. I think it's, uh, I can't argue with that. I don't know. It's kind of a good one. You should be friends with that. I'm saying just don't like let him like lick your face and stuff, you know? Yeah, yeah.

For, don't share the same ice coffee. Yeah, yeah. Also for the time being like when COVID first hit, I don't think there was anything wrong. with being like, yo, it's in China. How about we have nobody coming from China right now while we're just figuring this out. Kind of logical, but...

To some people, yeah. Yeah. People coming from Italy, stop that. Yeah. Yeah. That's where it's coming from. Stop that. Dude, Italy got fucking raped by COVID. That shit was crazy. Because they were all... Like, I didn't know this until I started talking to people. They're like, yeah, their medical services are horrible. And then a lot of people they are just eating garbage.

I hear, I hear, like, the infrastructure there, that's me trying to sound smart. But a lot of it, it sucks, though. Like, people... who I knew studied abroad in Florence. Like, they didn't have, like, electricity after a certain hour. They, like, turned shit off. Like, it was, like, a fucking third world country. Are you trying to save money or some shit?

Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what it is. But, yeah. It's also funny, too, because I forget that they were on the same side as the Nazis. And then I'm like, oh, yeah, I make sense why these Italian guys are racist. Probably, uh, it comes in there. I don't know. I never understood this part of war, too.

The Nazis, I've said this a bunch of times. The Nazis were on the same side as the, the Japanese. With the Japanese not like, hey, these guys probably aren't going to like us that much, you know? You know what I mean? These guys are white supremacists. Maybe I don't know if they knew what was going on.

Because I think I, by the way, this is all if you believe in the Holocaust. Which we don't on the morning of your podcast. That bad shit did happen. I'm trying to work in this business. Technically, technically, technically 10 people died in the Holocaust. But also 10 plus

6 million minus 10 technically 10 people died Also 6 million People died You know It's more than 6 million right It's 6 million Jews right And then 9 million total

Or something like that I never knew anything About the the That whole like Holocaust shit We're on the Holocaust I'm sorry No no keep on I'm coming you off

Am I wrong though Didn't 10 people die In the Holocaust technically It's such a bad sentence I don't know Explain that to me because 10 people died in the Holocaust

but also 6 million minus 10 but 10 people did die in the Holocaust it's like it's like the Kanye it's like

slavery was a choice it's like technically for white people it was a choice but it's like you can say one sentence in your eyes

that's like the Louie thing you know American history lots of hardships for black people when they were slaves and lots of hardships for white people too

when they took their slaves away what special was that no he said that on, on Leno. Yeah. How different talk shows you should be.

Yeah. You can really let loose. Yeah. Now Jimmy Fallon's like, are we having fun? Are we having fun? Do you have a seizure if Louis said that now? Oh, yeah.

On that Kanye point, I'm going to look like the just ultimate, like, conservative black man here. It's going to hurt my brand. I don't get a fuck. It's not hurt my niggas in the hood. They're not going to fuck with me.

I don't care. All I'm saying is Kanye was not wrong about that. What was he saying exactly? He was, well... Because technically for white people, it was a choice. Yes. So technically the sentence, it was a choice. I don't think that's what he was saying that.

Saying no, but in terms of to be enslaved for that long, and like, all right, I hate to get serious and deep here or something like that. It's okay because just us giggling, worried about her. Yeah, like, cool.

It's funny. The black man's taking the fall here. Yeah, yeah. You let it fly. It's funny me and him responding. Yeah. Just looking down. Yeah.

But how in terms of my people, how we look at ourselves as these African, like, wariers, like back then, like the tribesmen, like these big tribesmen, like generals, it's hard for me to believe that we all just lined up and got on these boats. Like these warriors and stuff, we just got on these boats. And like, it's like, so where are these warriors? It's where we outnumber them. And we were enslaved for this long. Yeah, my nigga.

That does sound like I'm not, you have the advantage. overall, like, if everybody was together, stop it. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm trying to understand. I'm not like, shaming you of this at all. Well, I think, isn't that part of it, though, weren't there like, didn't Africans sell Africans to America? I'm not, I'm not.

I'm not. No, no, no, no. Not defending it, yeah. That argument really quickly. Black guys did it too. That, that goes, that argument goes hand in hand with like, well, what about the gun violence in Chicago? That's not what I've tried to say

But the whole point of like Yeah it's like Yeah I don't know Think about your career No but you're phrasing it as a question right You were saying no well So I guess where does that tie in to What you're saying with Kanye's point

In terms of In terms of what like it being a choice Yeah yeah Well like are you saying that was the part No no no no no that part is not the choice And overall, it's weird to frame it as a choice because it's such poor wording. That's what Kanye suffers from. Him Trump and Alex Jones, same mind where they just say the wildest thing.

But I understand what he's saying. Like, if we look at ourselves, like, if you ever met like one of those really guys really believe in like the five percenters being like the black man is God and all that, to first to be a slave that long is like, what the fuck are we doing then? like, I get what you're saying. That's like, that's all I'm saying. You got to stick together. Yeah, I'm just kidding.

I mean, we're black actors, man. After this clip, I might be just hanging out of the hall. I ain't gonna be at Hall of Night's motherfucking shit. Well, I think what you're saying, I mean, I'm not, uh, not trying to white's playing. But like, I think what you're saying is like, you're curious. No, please do, because I need it right now. What you're saying is like, you're, you're curious about, like, how you guys were

enslaved that long. Yeah. And you're saying you're, what are you? mean by you guys. But I can also cut out whatever you want. Keep it all. Keep it all. I like it.

I like it's fun if it's like a little like, maybe I shouldn't say that. Because then why, what the fuck we're doing here? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it's also like, yeah. And that's, I think the, yeah, no, I just, yeah, I was, whatever.

Fuck it. Suck my dick. Who's ever listening? I'm out. I'm done caring. Every fucking episode, I care so much. Let's let it fly. Let's name this episode,

stay on your ground. Staying your ground Yeah That was the funny Mike Michael good With fucking Joe Coy And Candace Owens Yeah

This is funny Because like we're all Curiously Trying to answer these questions Like genuinely Because they are all like Yeah Yeah

Yeah But we're not like Like I The second you say something In one way You get attached to a bunch of people Like the second you say There were

Because there were Black people That sold black people To white people I'm not But you get thrown In that group of people that thinks that it's okay now. But here's the thing. It's like, that happened. Like, that's the

reality of the situation. Like, how come we can't mention that? Like, yeah, I can't say it at all. The thing is, that's a part of the story. You can't tell, that's a part of the whole story. You got to tell the full story. You get the whole context. And that's how you get, can't just hide that part. Like, it don't matter. Like, oh, that was just nothing. You were just little deals. Right. Well, I mean, there's, I mean, that shit's fucking everywhere. Like, we were just talking about the Holocaust, fucking, what's his face? The Queen's. husband, I forget which one he was, he was

a religious Nazi supporter. Like huge, big time Nazi supporter. Really? Yeah. And then the guy who's the king now, Charles, he has huge ties to, like, pedophilia and, like, Epstein and all that. Oh, well, Jimmy Saval was, like, the biggest piece of shit. And the queen,

literally, like, knighted him. Yeah. I mean, maybe, I don't know if she knew that he was like that. Yeah. And they killed they killed fucking Diana when she was going to, like, fucking go against them. Yeah. And, yeah. And by the way, I'm also, I'm going to preference all this, but I'm a fucking, the funniest part is the cover of this podcast. And then there's people listening right now in the future, just staring at me with a boner talking about the Holocaust. They're like, what the fuck am I listening to right now?

But that's what got you hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The gas chambers. I'm trying to work in this business. I'm sorry. I had to. That's so funny. What if you're like, yo, take out all the juice stuff.

They're right. Yeah. Yeah. Like, yeah, my people, yeah, I don't get a lot. I guess at the end of this, right? We have to rank which group we've, we've fucked with the most so far. Because gays for me...

Yeah, I'm going to have to face... Why are we even trying? I'm going to have to face the music for that one day. You know, the Holocaust stuff with you and then... All right, Eskimos. I got a real issue with them. Let's get into it. No, just kidding. Yeah, there's a...

Yeah, I don't know. But I'm also, I'm such a dumb idiot. Like, my brother will call me after the podcast. I said, you were so wrong about all this historical stuff. I'm like, yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I'm just pooping around. Try to figure stuff out.

Yeah, but what are we trying to be right here? Yeah, no, no. Yeah, this is thought-provoking stuff. The buddy's, you ever tune into a, I want to, what's the equivalency to far right podcast to far left podcast? Because I want to, I'm trying to, I jokingly, I mean, like, I'll check out Info Wars. I'll check out, I listen to Gavin McGinnis podcast recently. You know who he is?

Yeah, yeah. They started the Prapvode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, he started Vice, which is crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was him? Yeah, and then they booed him out. He's because, you know, obviously.

He's also, like, he's a giant piece of shit. Just listening to his podcast. I was like, just the way you hear him. And, like, it's not joking. It's like, it's hard to explain. But sometimes you can tell when somebody's really fucking around. Yeah. And I get that that line gets blurred.

But with him, it's, like, just so obvious that he's just like. He's just a piece of garbage. But it's just so funny he's talking about. He's like, yeah, I don't know, uh, big tits or big ass. I don't know. It's like next week we're going to talk about a hot conservative chick. So this is so funny that like, in some ways like, yeah, I get people are like, he's a monster. But it's so funny that the guy that like, he's a monster. And you're listening to his podcast.

He's like, yeah, there's a hot conservative shit with big tits I meant in college. Like, it's just funny. Yeah, yeah. No, I think when you see people like actually, like, okay, you look, you read an article about some shit. Somebody said, oh, that fucking piece of shit. And then you watch them like actually and you're like, oh, yeah. It's just some idiot. I'd see at a bar.

Yeah, exactly. You know. 100%. That's how I thought about Trump. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The first time, like, when I was in, like, 12th grade and that's, like, 2016, everybody's just going off about all his comments. And I sat down and really watched his first, like, debate.

I was like, this guy's kind of funny. Yeah, it's hilarious. I was like, this guy's kind of funny, man. Yeah. Oh, the stuff with Jeb. Just, what was that? Oh, Jeb Bush, that's a Florida guy. But, yeah, he was that the one who's, he was shitting on his wife?

Or that was Ted Cruz, he was saying his wife stuff. I think he shot him both of their wives. Oh, yeah, no, no, with Jeb Bush, because his wife. wife's from Mexico. And he's like, ah, Jeb, like, you know, wives from Mexico, like, I think he's going to be a little soft

in the illegal immigration. And people really hate on a cop, like, that's genius. Like, what? This man has a shroken genius. Oh, man. I'm sorry. See, I did a full 1A with Trump.

When Trump first came out because I was in a fraternity and all the dudes ran to Trump, I was like, fuck this guy. I was like, he's an idiot. He's a fucking piece of shit. I don't know why, because I was in,

I'm always counter whatever my environment is because I'm a fucking doucheback contrarian. Yeah, yeah. When I was in college, I was in a fraternity, I was like, you guys are all fucking retards for listening to this fucking retard. You guys are all stupid. This guy's stupid. I can't believe you support this guy. And then I got to New York City. And then I, all liberal people are talking about how to hate Trump. And I'm like, he's kind of funny.

Like, I just, I switched. Yeah. Oh, when the, uh, I've never voted for it, but I think he's funny. Election Day, when, uh, 2016, you know, everybody was expecting Hillary did win. And my college was, I was on, on my campus. Everybody's extremely liberal. So they were all like, Hillary's. gonna fucking win, let's go.

And there's this big celebration before it even happened in the air. And he just starts creeping his way up. Yeah. And it was just like such an underdog sports story. I was just like, dude, I'm fucking for this. Let's go. Come on a car team. Yeah, dude.

Yeah, yeah. It's going on a crazy road wild card run. I was like, God, all right. Let's do it. Let's do it. And that's the point where I am now is like, I'm like, I used to be so like, how could you vote? No, I'm like, dude, I don't give a, I was like, dude.

Nobody's a good option. It's like, I don't think you could love anybody, and I don't give a shit with your politics are now. You're a full communist. I don't care. If you're going to hang out with, I'm for you. But what happened to that? Because growing up, that's how it was.

It was like, I don't give a fuck. Being around people who are older, like, they didn't give a fuck. They didn't talk about politics like that. It wasn't really a conversation. Yeah. That's why I'm out. It's the fluoride in the water. Yeah.

I'm like, what the fuck happened? It was like, I think it was to. John McCain and Barack. Like that just changed it forever. How so? Where it became more public conversation, where it became where politics became more like coffee table,

like more like, yeah. Well, Obama wasn't he the first president on Twitter? He was the first black president. I know that. I'm aware. My mom was crying that night. I remember, yes, she was, yeah. I think that's a pretty juice for that one too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, because

like my parents, very liberal, so and I was too young at that point to not to like disagree with them or whatever so I was like yeah fuck yeah like this is kind of cool my first I heard a white person saying I didn't vote for Obama but I would have I'm like that's so funny

you do the right thing in a hypothetical scenario way to go I would have yeah that's literally like the Mark Wahlberg I would have stopped the terrorist on 9-11 quote oh yeah that was psycho that's so funny he said that yeah he said I was on that plane

things should not have gone down that way because there's been a lot of blood in the first cabin He played a boxer in one movie, and he thinks he's going to fucking do something. All right. I'm a sound a little fucked up, but niggas took over a plane with box cutters. Y'all did that ass. Oh, I'm totally all on.

Come on. Come on. Y'all motherfuck. Whatever fight that was. Let's get into it. Come on. Box cutters, man. You could overtaken them.

Come on. Y'all, I'm sorry. All right. Are they puppies or was it an inside job? Mm. box cutters I would believe this No I think they knew about it

I genuinely No as I said I'm a fucking idiot But I think the US government Probably knew about 9-11 And they let it happen So they could like push stuff forward Because they're like

But then I was talking to my dad about it And he brought up a pretty intelligent fact He goes Well to be fair They have everybody on terrorist list And that doesn't Because all those people were on a list already Like the 9-11 terrorists

Yeah To be fair It's like everybody's These lists are ginormous So like Yeah it's like Al-Qaeda was obviously on that list It's like that doesn't necessarily mean they knew

But what's going to happen? Yeah Because like you can't just attack everybody Who like you think of tears That's what happened after which is fucked up Because then you have people getting waterboard and shit In like Guantama Bay I felt like after the first attack

They should have known That they were going to come back Oh the second one yeah Yeah Like Or was it our move we turned the other tower We were like you know what This is what Jesus would do

Have us on the other side today now But boss I worked in the world Trade Center now You do? I worked in Tower 7 like a couple years ago Yeah

You're gonna lose your job No it's fine No no no no no it's fine I mean yeah It's a little fucking Everyone's always like No now it's the most secure Building of all time

They do say to do What if we need a reason To go start an unjust war again Like fucking let's do it again Like what would cause the biggest shock So you're talking That one gives a shit about the Empire State Building I was gonna say that

That's so funny I was going to say that next. It's an old, it's an old shitty building. It's like the, it's like the fucking 10th tallest now probably. Like, if you went for the,

for ours again, that's a big. That's like, three times? Yeah. That's a three p. And it's like, yeah,

it's the most protected building, but it's still got it again. Yeah, it's got you all three times. I mean, you know, yeah. So it's, uh,

it's a little, it is a little weird up there sometimes when, I feel like I've, I've yet to be like high in there. Would not want to be high in there. be terrified. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that would be creepy.

I wonder if we worked with the same company because I worked in Tower 7. No. No, you know, like so? I mean, just, there's so many different companies. Yeah, that's so stupid to me. I'm like, yeah, man, the world is right. It's a man.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, 124s are the same company. Yeah, what was I fucking thinking? Yeah. That's fun, though. Do you ever go to the top deck and check things out? No, honestly, I don't know me. I mean, like the view, I'm on the 59.

floor. Yeah, it's enough. It's enough. Yeah. Yeah. I've been, like, I've been up to like 70. There's some like sky lounge there. But like, I don't feel the need to like do the touristy thing. But, um, damn, 59 is, 59 is a lot for me. I can't even allow. Yeah. I'll make me nervous. Yeah. They say the, uh, for our building, this is so boring. But for my company to rent out that floor, especially that high out, it's very cheap because no one, no companies. Yeah. Because people don't want to, I know someone who left my company. Fuck, I should stop talking about this. But someone, she's not there anymore.

But left my company, she was like, so scared of like 9-11 happening again. Yeah, I get it, dude. I told you off the stuff. Dude, I didn't do that. When I worked at Tower 7th, I just did he left the city completely on the, because I was working on the 25th anniversary or whatever. Was that recent? Was it 20th anniversary?

20th, yeah. Yeah, so like, 20th. Oh, yeah. No, 20th. Yeah, 20th is coming up. So be prepared. But I. 20, whatever, is coming up.

Tomorrow. Yeah. 21? 21. Yeah, 21. Yeah, it's 21. Because last year was 20, yeah, yeah. What you think's going to happen?

Bagpipes. A bunch of... Send a plane to the garden. Yeah. We don't need the Knicks no more. You can take that shit. The, what was I saying? Fucking...

Yeah, I was scared that day, though. Like, I was planning on how to jump out of the building. Like, I'm also... That's part of my OCD where I'm thinking of these crazy scenarios and preparing for them. I'm like, all right, I would tie these course. around and jump out and then do, and it was serious? There's, what would you do?

I go, I'm gonna die. Yeah, I'm just jerking off. Yeah, yeah, fucking, yeah. Grab a titty of a co-workers. What, you're not gonna feel trauma after this. We're dead. Like, that's it, babe. You do that and you survive and it's just awkward as shit.

Oh, God. That reminds me, I don't know why this reminds you, but I had a friend who went to, so you went to this private school, and he told everybody can suck his dick because he thought he was transferring like pull off everybody in Facebook like literally was like fuck you this person

this person you guys are all pussy's I'm going to fucking Winter Park High School you guys are fuck you parents are like no you're staying here and then he just had to stay there you made so many fucking enemies it's like it's literally the plot of Max Keeble's big move basically do you ever see that movie with uh...

it was like this kid and he was like his parents are moving so he's like just fucking shit up he's like whatever I don't even live here or like a move moving and his parents like, we're staying after you just like fucked up his whole life. He's like, what the fuck? Yeah. Well, wait, wait, wait, have you talked about meeting Trump on this podcast yet?

No, no. Yeah, yeah, all right. Yeah. So, um, I, uh, I played golf growing up. I'm not rich, but whatever. Wait, but your parents were liberal that, I think of golf is being conservative for some reason. I don't know why. I can see that.

Yeah. It probably, for sure it is. Tiger Woods. No, they were liberal. I mean, my dad, I mean, like, there's, like, public courses in Brooklyn. There's two public courses in Brooklyn. So my dad had to play there, you know.

Did you grow up in New York, too? Yeah, yeah, Brooklyn. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So, I mean, I feel like a lot of, like, retired cops and shit play. Yeah. So that's conservative, but it's not all, like,

I guess, white collar, right? Whatever. It was played a lot. They opened up this, like, inner city, like, golf program. It's called the City Parks Foundation. And, whatever. I joined it.

They would have all these cool events, and one of them was Trump. He was opening up his new golf course in the Bronx. This was like back in 2012, I think. And he was having a press event for it. And like fucking Mike Bloomberg was there. This guy Jack Nicholas, like the greatest golf of all time, was there. You know, local politicians, fucking, you know, local news.

Eric Adams. Yeah, he was like a fucking, like, he was like the 30-second councilman or some shit. probably yeah um there was like a bronx so each borough has a mare and there's this dude from the bronx his last name is Diaz and he was like you would think oh maybe like esteemed kind of politic no he's just like a Bronx dude like just Bronx dude like I just got the got the fucking is it would it be a Yankee aren't there they're more Mets guys in the Bronx I would say Yankee are you Yankees yeah Yankees yeah I really like you but the Bronx the Yankee stadium is yeah but Bronx you want to think there would be

Because I thought there was like a thing where the Mets guys were more blue collar. And isn't there some, I know they're totally... The Mets guys being more blue collar? That's different. I think it's just like Queens and Bronx. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know.

I'm a fucking idiot. Both surrounding areas of the stadiums, really Latino. So, you know, what's the difference? And the players, that you're being. Yeah, yeah, it's true. That's true. But anyway, yeah, big press event for it. I'm going to fucking.

And I'm there. They selected a few kids from the program. And they had, they wanted me there. They wanted like a bunch of like, like diverse kids, right? Yeah. But they had me there because I was like the best player like in the program.

So they needed someone to. Are you sure or was like diversity? A little bit of work. No, no. I'm sure you were that good? I was. I was diverse just diverse enough.

Yeah. For it to be acceptable. That did you guys as guys that aren't you're, are you half, white? Yeah, half white, half Asian. Do you ever worry? Like, I feel like I would constantly every time I got booked or something, I'm like, am I a diversity hire? I would always

I feel I got to worry about that with jobs and stuff. Here's the thing. I never worked a job that was trying to do that. Like, it's to be honest, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, the Asian thing, I mean, like for college is, I feel like it's worse. Yeah, now it is. You're competing with all these fucking, you know, four point whatever GPAs. It's like you got to be, you got

it's hard to stand out with that. Um, comedy. I, I, I don't give a fuck. Yeah. I don't know. You got a gig for me? Thank you, sir. Like, yeah.

Yeah. I'm really, Asian. Yeah. I'm not going to be on any black comedy shows after this podcast. I'm going to have to do. I better sign up for compound media. I don't know.

I'm better try to. Yeah, Amber, what's good, homie? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you're going to be on ladder with Crowder. Um. Okay, let's fucking get into the Trump thing. So, yeah, I, so had all these kids there.

Fucking, they're giving all these speeches. I'm waiting for around for like two hours, like in the cold and fucking, you know. I had to wear this like shirt, short and sleeve shirt to like rep the program that I'm a part of. And then out of nowhere, they're like, hey, we need you to hit like a golf shot, like in front of everybody for like a picture to hit like the inaugural T shot for the course to make him, you know, look good. Like, hey, we let this little kid do it. So I'm like, all right, shit. they crowd around. They're all watching.

They have all the cameras ready. And I got all these fucking people watching me. Trump, too. He's standing there. I'm taking some practice swings to get warmed up to, like, loosen up my muscles and shit. And as I'm doing that, Trump yells out from the crowd. He says, hurry up, kid.

Me and the mayor have places to be. And I was like, fucking, what, 14 at the time? So, like, I got nothing for him. And it was hard to shit on him back then, too. What are you going to fucking do? Because everybody loved him. He was in every rap song. The apprentice, top ratings.

You know, you couldn't say shit. Don't get me stuff. And I was a little kid, so I'm just like, oh, fuck this guy. So, you know, I'm just like, all right, let's just hit the shot. Get up there, whatever. Hit it okay. And then, yeah, afterwards he came up to me. It's like, yeah, you know, he's like a nice shot.

Let's take a picture so you can impress some girls with it. Oh, there you go. Yeah, now, now their girls don't like that. No. If I, yo, if I met any other president, This picture would be like, oh, like, I have a picture with him. They'd be like, oh, it's fucking sick. Even if George W. Bush would be kind of fun.

Yeah, yeah. People forgive him, though. Yeah, yeah, he was hated. Yeah, but now, now they're like, they forgive him because, you know, he's like a charming guy or whatever. Yeah, he's like fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, like, no, the Trump thing, it's like nothing. I mean, if I had a picture with Obama, that would, you're good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're good. Yeah. But that was the thing I was fucking talking about with my mom. I was like, it's wild how I've only had one normal president. Because, like, Bush was so stupid. And then Trump was insane. And then Biden is just brain dead.

He's brain dead. He's brain dead. Yeah. My lifetime. Yeah. But what was, we got like four minutes left. What were your both your experience growing up in New York? Would you guys grow up and where'd you grow up and where'd you grow up? I grew up in Crown Heights, Franklin Avenue.

I never said I lived in Park Slope. I said I lived by Park Slope. And Kev's been saying I live in Park. slope for two years. But it was good. I live in a gentrified neighborhood now. It's not the hood. It's a neighborhood. How recent is that? Also, one crazy

thing about gentrification, I didn't even realize to I was back in Orlando is gentrification is great in Florida because people are buying their houses. So people own their land. I'm so stupid. I didn't realize that like so now your house goes up in value compared to you getting priced out when you're renting.

Which I had no idea because I was always like, no, gentrification fucking sucks because it's like, I mean, my rent's getting raised a bunch because our fucking piece of shit. It sucks. It's half and half. Like, yeah, like, you lose some of those mom and pop stores,

but if you own the- It does, it does get safer. No, that's true, yeah, but I'm saying, like, if you're renting, if you don't have a lot of- That's the thing that's going to get you canceled. Yeah. Like, the neighborhood gets safer.

It's true. Yeah. But what I'm saying, like, if you own a house in Orlando and the neighborhood gets better, you can sell the house for way more money. So it's like, you're actually benefiting from gentification.

As far as somebody just said that to me, Did you have a house with one of the cages over it, like to not let the golf balls come in? You ever see one of those? I've seen one of those. I didn't have one of those. Yeah, yeah. They put me in a cage when I was a child, though. That's hot.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I grew up in Windsor Terrace. Everybody, like, thinks of it as Park Slope. It's the neighboring neighborhood, less known. But it was really shitty up until about probably the mid-2000s, probably early 2000s, when it kind of turned around. But, like, my parents bought their house for, like, 80 grand back in the late 80s and it's now probably worth like 2. Something million. Yes, that's a case where it went up.

Yeah, yeah, it went crazy up and like, I don't necessarily know if it was gentrification that neighborhood. It was more just like drug addicts, just like a, just a shithole neighborhood and kind of turned around. They got moved down and it kind of. Yeah, yeah. So, I mean, like growing up, there was a, there were like neighborhood thugs. Like there was this guy, drug addicts. guy. He would

He like had an ongoing history of one of my neighbors, my next-door neighbor, like had robbed their house or attempted to rob their house multiple times. That's so funny. And this guy would be in and out of jail. I love when people like rob one place. Yeah. To double down, like, I'm going back. Yeah, his name was Dougie. He was like a fucking known neighborhood

fucking crook. Yeah. I don't know if I talked about this in the podcast or ever heard this on somebody else's podcast. I heard the best scheme in the world. So what this guy did was he took somebody's car, stole it. he left a note saying, I'm so sorry.

I had to steal your car. I had a family emergency. Here are two tickets to a Red Sox game or something like that. And they went, they're like front row seats. He goes, oh, hell yeah, we'll fucking go.

They're like, okay, whatever they got borrowed our car. This is a crazy thing, but we'll go to the game. They go to the game. While they're gone, the guy robbed their house.

Oh, my God. That's like the smartest thing. That is smart. That is smart. That's fucked up. Yeah, it's so fucking. Because imagine that feeling we were like, you trust somebody. Like, I had a package thief here a couple weeks ago.

And we've had a ton of package stolen. And so I'm walking out of my building. This dude's walking in with a mask. And maybe he has a mask. But this is mostly besides that woman that's like 1,000, this is all young people in this building. So there's like an old guy wearing a mask and he like, I opened the door and he like darts in right after me. And so I was like, okay, this is kind of suspicious. I hope he's not a package.

He also has like a big bag. What color was he? He was black. Let me explain what happened. So he was like, mostly because he was an old dude. Anyways, I leave and then I come back and I go, he's still in the lobby, which is just kind of weird because I was like, all right, this is 10 minutes later, the dude's still here.

And he goes, I go, hey man, we've had a lot of package these. I'm not trying to be a dick, but did you, there was packages that were there and they were missing now. So I only confronted him because I saw a package there and they're missing. I go, hey man, were these, did you take these packages? and he goes, he goes, no, you mean the packages over here? And it turns out they're behind the corner. And I go, I'm so sorry, I did not mean to accuse.

I was like, I feel like a piece of shit. It's like, we each other people stealing packages. These buildings, mostly young people. I just, I, I, I, and he goes. And I saw you with the melanin. That wasn't what it was. It was an old dude. But I come up straight.

But a little bit, though. A little bit. I don't think it. Look, if I was in your shoes, I'd probably do the same shit. I'd be like, yo, bro, where the shit's at? Like, you're the only one here. I have no one else here. Maybe it was, my first thing was like, I was like, fuck, I'm so sorry.

I come to my girlfriend. I'm like, I guess I'm racist. I'm like, that must do it. I was like, fuck. Because if I accused him and he was stealing, then I'm not racist. Just by the rule. Yeah, if you're right. Yeah.

So what happened was and also they have, yeah, anyways, I go downstairs and the packages are gone two minutes later. So the guy, it was the guy stealing packages. And then I was like. There you go. But that makes me think of the, of remember the guy in Brooklyn who shot people on the train. Remember the big. Sunset Park?

Yeah, yeah. The big Brooklyn train shooting. And then he was in the East Village and some bodega guy recognized him. And it was like, oh, it's him and call the cops on him. But like, I was saying like, one time, like, if you get that wrong. Oh, it's so bad. You're ruined. You got to move towns.

Yeah. Your business is over. Yeah. So it's extra risk. But like, I mean, more props to him. That's top, that's top tier racial profiling right there. Yeah. That's good stuff.

So we're saying that racial profiling has a positive side. That's what we're staying your ground and racial profiling has positive side. That's the whole premise and that black people also enslave. No. It wasn't. You shouldn't touch gays because of monkey pilots. What? Just forgetting things you've said.

I will defend myself right here. When you open the door to your building and somebody's not in the building, you're not even, you really shouldn't let people into your building that aren't. aren't in the building. Does that make sense? Like, he doesn't have to understand. So I'm like, the fact that he darted in, like, when I was coming out, like, wasn't like, oh, sorry, I'm waiting. Because if you're waiting for somebody, you can wait for them to come out. It's like, when somebody darts in right after you and you've had Packaged Dillon and he's, like, way older than everybody in this building. Oh, I thought you're going to say something. No, no. I was like, those were the factors. I guarantee if it was a white guy would have the same thing. But who knows? I've also been racist before. So, yeah. Yeah. Well. Is that it?

What are you guys want to promote? That's the last line of it? Promote shit. I don't know. Follow me. Kevin McLean, last name, MCG, L-O-I-N. But it's two ends on Instagram. Kevin McGloin. And also got a show Prohibition Comedy.

It's at Prohibition underscore Comedy. Our next show is on the 28th. And yeah, that's enough for me. Yeah, so much of nice things. And I'm just like catching me out of laughing boo to Mike. There we go. Some shit. I don't got a nice thing.

I hope more people go to that. We're going to a laughing boot of Mike tonight. Exactly. I help more people go to Zuri's than yours. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking, they might. Yeah.

Also, if you're listening, you know what? I'm done trying to please you. It's this aura of, like, I know it's nobody in particular, but whenever I say something in my podcast, I picture each person I know in my life getting disappointed by it. And, whoa. So really quickly, you just did James Camacho's podcast, right? Yeah. Yeah. So I did his, like, a few months ago.

And it was about his two podcasts. One of them was about like growing up mixed race, right? So I was talking about my, you know, Asian side of my family. It's so funny because I was like, why didn't he, for a second, I'm so stupid. I'm like, why didn't he ask me to do that one? I'm not mixed race. So he was asking me about my difference between my age side of my family, Irish side of my family.

And I was talking about my Irish side of my family and just how my fucking, I was like shitting on my aunts because they're crazier than my uncles are. Like they come in with Jack Daniels and cigarettes. They're just like, I think I use the word scuds bag, which is horrible. They're my fucking family. Very nice. And I'm like, no one's going to listen to this. And I saw them all at a funeral recently.

Oh, we saw you on that podcast. Oh, oh, which one? They go, oh, it's like the mixed race one. They go, oh, don't worry, it was funny. I go, did you think it was funny? Yeah. It's, yeah, brutal. So people do fucking listen that you don't think.

Well, that's my fear right now. I ain't going to have no fans. We will cut. We'll cut whatever we mean. No, keep it all in. We're keeping this all in. All right. Well, I mean, if Kev wants to take out his

Harvey Milk hate or whatever, his gay hate. You know it's always funny, too. All right. It was not hate. And I thought it was pretty funny. So whatever. Leave it in. I'm a horror.

Leave it in, man. Yeah, everybody, thanks for listening. And just remember that the reason I thought that guy was thief was not because he was black. And guys, okay.