Morning Good - Stargate - Episode 202

Episode Date: December 31, 2023

Joe Jacques and Paddy Defino join the show for today's New Year's Eve episode. They talk about Ancient Aliens, Christmas in the city, and going to a stranger's funeral as a kid.Thanks to Joe and Padraic for coming back on the show and Happy New Year to everyone watching and listening from home. For more funny stuff from these comics, check their links down below.Paddy Defino is on Instagram @paddy_is_funky and hosts News From Bed on YouTube. Joe Jacques is on Instagram as well @joejaxcomedy and produces the Rough Week podcast with Christophe Jean, so check that out too.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michaelgoodcomedy and on Twitter @agoodmichael. Check out the show on YouTube and follow the official Instagram page @morninggoodpodcast.This podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax 

Thanks for the F-Shack. I love dirty Mike and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They call it the podcast? Morning, very good. Hey, welcome to the air.

Thanks. Welcome to the morning. We're here with Patty Defino. Hey, check. And Joe Jacks. Hey, guys. Is it Jacks or Jquez? It's Jax.

Okay. Is pronounced Jax? Yeah. It's a French name that my family has made. Oh, I always thought you're Hispanic. I am, yeah. My mom's made name was Garcia. What the fuck are you?

Are you French or Hispanic? No, I try to take more of the Mexican. Like, I wish I could, on my SAT, I do put, like, Hispanic. Just so you can say the N-word in the essay? I mean, technically, I mean, I'm close to. You put the essay in essay. That's the thing about, I feel like with the Hispanic guys using the N-word, it's definitely not considered okay.

Any more. But it's considered like almost. Like like, like, like, yeah. Like, like, yeah. Like, like,

yeah. Not cool. Maybe. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. But if people don't know, I spilled water

all over the recording equipment. Like, before I, like, we set up perfectly for 35 minutes. And then, yeah, it was pretty funny.

Scoot over a little. Get in here. Get in here. Yeah, one of the lights broke in the house. Patrick, Patrick, Padric.

Patrick. I almost forgot. I thought we were signing a lease together. And I was like, oh, I thought Patrick was short for Patrick. Patty, he goes about Patty, but it's Padriac.

Oh, that's cute. Is that like, Gaelic or something? I hate giving out my real full God. They'll figure it out eventually. Then you can find where I work. You're going to go on Oprah one day and you'll open up and the people will find out eventually. If I'm on Oprah, it's because I've

like murdered a family. And for some reason the jury decided against my sentencing. I have to explain myself. She's done, right? Oprah's done. Like canceled? I think, no,

I think just like done with the show, right? Yeah, yeah. I don't know what she's up to. She's doing, they're redoing her movie. The color purple was her.

She was in that, right? The new one? The color purple? Yeah. I think she runs the, oh no. Isn't that where,

like, the slur for Italians came from? The Italians have black, they call them mouianos, right? Milions, yeah, you ever watched soprana? Yeah, it means.

Like the fucking mulies. It means a, uh, what's it called, an eggplant, right? Oh, maybe. Because an eggplant is so black, purple. Well, there's also

in true romance, I think, as they explain, because it's like the Italians feud with the Sicilians, because the Sicilians would have kids with black people. Right. I think it's just because Italians are so stupid. Yeah. That they need to compare everything to food. Yeah.

They need to like it looks like the sushi people are coming through this paper. Yeah. Yeah. It's just an Italian guy like under the sink. So what happened? You had a loose canoli. Yeah. You got to tighten the fetichini. That'll the canola over.

Well, it is what I do because, like, they continue to disappoint. Like, it's like one of these things where, like, I, you know, obviously make fun of Italians. I'm like whatever percentage Italian, which I found out I'm not. I'm like Croatian because, like, the people in Italy are from other places because it's a fucking port. So it's just fishermen coming in and fucking all the Italian women.

And that's what that whole country's made out of. That's why their pussy smell so bad. That's not all that out. Just a put this in your pussy. I don't know how to it. It is funny because I am one. for one in stinky Italian

pussy. I only had one, but it's like... You have a stinky Italian pussy? Stinky, dude. Stink town, USA. Mr. Claver, right, you'll be... It was unfortunate for her because she gave... Because she has a sticky pussy, that's pretty unfortunate.

She had a stinky pussy, but she gave such good head that it was like, I never ever once. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If there's a girl that has a smelly vagina and you... Is part of it like spoiled milk where you kind of want to go back in there and make sure.

Like, you kind of get a little whiff of it and you're like, ooh, and then you're like, ooh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got to get that a little bit. Like, if you scratch your ass, you just kind of want to smell all the time. I do like smell my fingers afterwards, but not, when during his vagina smells, it's just too much at once. You're like, this is too pungent, but like the smell

on my finger afterwards, I'm like, yeah. It's like a trophy. Yeah, yeah. But, uh, but it's funny because they tell is they just keep this appellate. It's like, like, I saw somebody the other day is these two, I mean, whatever, fucking Austin Comics. They're like, you know, the biggest lynching in the world was actually Italian guy, or the biggest lynching in America was Italians.

You're like, okay. Like the fattest lynching. Just a steel cable to hold up a fucking thick. They just so want to be a part of something. You know what I mean? They just so badly. They just want to be, yeah, they want to feel like they were treated wrong. I do have to check one.

Can you guys, wait, wait a second. Get the engine going because I have to check the camera for one more thing. Sure. So just keep stinky pussy. for like one more second. I don't know. Do you guys talk a lot about sex on this show?

Too much. Yeah, well, there's nothing wrong with too much sex talk. I've been in a podcast in forever to this capacity of, uh, and me and Christos podcast,

most of it was just like, it would be a little bit about like, saying way too much personal things about our girlfriends and our sex lives and then eventually being like, we gotta cut that. No,

I think, uh, yeah, I want to know more about the, the breakups for you guys. No, the morning good listeners have heard in depth every single detail on it.

Yeah, they don't need to hear anything else more. And I talked to you about it. Me and Joe, Christmas, I took an edible and just hung out with this guy all day. And it was a great fucking day. Yeah, no, it was good. Yeah, you were high as hell.

I was having such a normal day and you were just like, dude, thank you for like being here when I'm freaking out right now. You're on the Nordak Santa tracker. He's in Nigeria right now. Hide. He's coming.

Dude, I was so like, yeah, it's one of those days, too. Like, you know what, like, it definitely happens more on, like, you were saying, like, acid. Definitely on shrooms and stuff like that. We're, like, you do a drug and then it seems like the most adventurous day ever. And then really, like, we were just on the train for 45 minutes. But I was like, that was the longest train ride. Because I was kind of freaking out on the train. And then, like, me and you start to have the most in-depth conversation.

I was confessing, like, crazy shit. Nothing crazy, but just, like, very, like, I mean, stuff I'll normally talk about for the most part. Yeah, that's my interpretation of you is, like, I can't tell if it's me or if you just do that to everybody. Or if, or not even. that you do that, but it's you're that you're as open as you are. You are an open book. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I think in general, I'm a very open person.

But it's weird, though, because the second you share a lot, there's always that little aspect to you that's like, ooh, did I, I just did that. Because in my mind, especially with this podcast, I'm like, part of me is like, I want my kids to know everything, I want them to listen, my son's going through a breakup. He's like, wow, my dad got jerked off by like a 60-year-old dominatrix in a hotel, and that's who he was. Things are actually pretty good for me. Yeah.

But then part of me is also like, oh, that's going to be. be so disturbing having kids and having them know of everything. But it is nice because it's like, I feel like with my dad, I feel like I don't really know who he is because I think he puts up this like, I mean, he's a great guy, but I think there's, there's got to be hidden darkness that I haven't seen behind him. Because he's just like, he's literally howl from that, from, um, like just wearing tube socks. Like, if fanny packs were bigger, he'd have that, like, like, fattening up your mom. Yeah, yeah, just for sexual activity. Oh, I don't remember that episode. He just like, he puts like bacon and sugar and like everything.

And she just keeps getting fatter. He wants her tis to get me or something. Yeah, he just likes a big chubber. We were watching it with Christophia that. He was getting really hot for the mom and dad. Dude, the mom is something. There's something about a sitcom mom. It's kind of like the teacher that you have that isn't a hot teacher,

but the fact that she's your teacher, you have sexual fantasies about her. I had, I had teachers where I'm like, they're not hot, but at the same time, I would be jerking off like, oh, fuck. Oh, yeah. I had like this one, like, Hispanic woman. She had that kind of like dead look to her where you're like, you look like you're either on heroin or like half of a person. Just like very thick darkness below the eyes.

And she'd always talk like this. Okay, class. And I'm like, just a reluctant hand job from her. You know, you better study if you want to make an A next week. And I'm just like, oh, yeah. A blow job where she falls asleep halfway through. So you finish the job. Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking.

I would have sex with a day cast out woman's. mouth. That's... Teacher. No, no. But to be fair, that is passed out from boredom, not from...

If a student... I like that I'm justifying me not raping woman in a hypothetical. In this hypothetical situation, I only have sex with her because she gets tired.

If a teacher passes out halfway through sex with a student, and the student finishes... Who is a rapist? Yeah. Offsetting penalties in a football game. Like, everybody's clear to go.

Yeah, yeah. Everybody... Yeah, you're just safe. We're calling it. That was a... Continue. No flag on the plate. How was your Christmas as magical as ours?

It was magical, but we laid my grandfather to rest. Okay. As a Christmas tradition. Every Christmas, we do it every year. We dig them back up on Christmas Eve. Make sure he decorates the tree and then put him back on. No, but they, every year we do go to my grandma, so his wife, his old wife, we go to her

headstone in the cemetery on Christmas Eve. That's fun. And we sing Christmas carols like around. You guys are so Irish that's such a like solemn thing to do. You sing Mr. Brightson. Start it out. We're just falling. I was doing. That's fine.

That reminds me literally of like what is it the other guys where they sing like the and all the children were hanged. Just like all the drunk Irish guys get together and sing like songs. It is just that, and we sing, but like this year, I guess they couldn't lock down the plot next to my grandmother for my grandfather. So what they're doing is they're just, they dug her grave and they just threw him on top. So he's only like three feet under.

Oh, damn. Like he's just right on the surface. But while we were at the cemetery, the hole was open at my grandma's thing. Oh, shit. And there was like a couple pieces of wood over the top. So it was very eerie. Yeah, yeah. Very straight.

They threw him on top of her like in the same casket. For one last lay. Yeah. We're making 10 children. But this something super funny happened at the wake. And he's like a remarkable guy. I think like 600 people showed up to like view his like body. Which they didn't do a good job with.

Like they, you know how like when you go, they make you look like you're almost alive like in the funeral home, you know? But with him, dude, it looked like it was bad. It looked like there was like smeared shit all over his face. His tongue was sticking out. He didn't clip his nails. So like that scream mask. Yeah. Scary movie that was a.

But so at the wake they were doing a like a service. There was a priest giving a like a talk. And it was someone who knew my grandpa really well. He was like a, my grandpa was a coach and he was one of his players. So he was, he was going. And it was like so beautiful and touching.

and while he's got like I'm like I'm starting to cry and then all the sudden I didn't realize this but there was about 30 kids there from my uncle who my uncle was a coach and they were all players of his so they all came to like show support but when you're like a kid at a funeral for someone who you don't care about like it's the funniest thing ever playing with hot wheels and stuff just on the caskey so they're kind of to like, like, get a load of what's going on. So, dude, in the middle of the speech, all of a sudden, like, it's like, he's, the priest is at the casket and he's like flicking holy water on my grandpa. And, like, everyone is, like, bawling their eyes out. And it just goes silent for a second. And on one of the kids' phones, they just played a hauga. And, dude, I went from, like, cry. I was, like, 30 years old. I went from, like, crying to just like, what the fuck was that?

I was so pissed at all these kids. Oh, I thought you were laughing. No, I was so, so mad. I was like, how do I beat up a teenager? Yeah, I get away. At a funeral home and get away with that. Was it like a prank or was it like his TikTok going on? I don't know.

I don't know what it was, but it was perfect comedic timing. And it took me like two hours to understand. It is funny. It is funny. And they are kids and they don't care to be there at all. Did you ever go to a funeral when you're a kid? Yeah. I feel like it was pretty heavy.

I don't remember like being it being lost on it. It is heavy, but if you're at one, like I went to one when I was in college for my college baseball's coach's mother. And like, it's a thing where it's like, we never knew her.

So like we're in there and like we pay her respects. And as soon as we get into the parking lot, we're like, she looked pretty fucking hot. Yeah, yeah. Like the jokes just start rolling. Oh, yeah, yeah.

You always give like one second to, by the way, everybody, permission to fart in my casket. You can go all that. wherever the bits are, do them. Draw a sharpie Hitler mustache on my body.

Whatever makes it fun, I don't care. Have a good time. The video of the guy getting lowered in the casket or like burying him and he recorded something to be played out loud and it's him going like, stop, stop! I'm so alive. Yeah, that is the funny is we are,

maybe the best generation of humor is like kind of like those kids that grew up on the internet, you know what I mean? Like kind of all right. Yeah. So it is going to be fucking nuts when we die and like everybody's like, Yeah, okay, so levels will be playing as I'm getting put in by a V-Chi. And, yeah, my first funeral was either that baby funeral I had to go to. It's definitely that baby's first funeral.

Yeah. I'm saying. Baby's first funeral. Yeah. This goes in the scrapbook at the end. It's the last finish. It's just a baby's first funeral. It's a baby wearing a toxin.

In the casket. Yeah, we stole this tucks off of ventriloquist stuff. Fit perfect. I have that bit about the baby girl. The joke is that you have to put all the babies attending the funeral. They had to get their suits from like Bill to Bear Workshop. He was like pulling them off the bears and put them on the bodies. But then my second one was my uncle who like died of AIDS.

And it was just funny to learn what AIDS was when you were. Yeah. Because everybody's like, he was gay. Like, I was gay. Like, I was gay. Okay. Did they bury him? Face down.

Were you like Christian or Catholic? I, uh, yeah. So I was kind of like, uh, I used to be really intense about God. And now I'm like going, I'm weird. I went away and now I'm like getting a little bit, life gets a little challenge. Dude, you get sucked back into God. Uncover some Jordan Peterson. Yeah.

Did you see that video of that guy storming the stage? She's like, I'm mentally ill. I just need help. Mr. Peterson. He's like, okay. Disturvy. That really happened? Dude, yeah.

Be working. And I never, the last thing I'll ever blame is like, external things for people going crazy which is so funny like seeing like a guy like crying, he's like,

Mr. Peterson, my life's a nightmare, how do I? Like, he's just tackling this guy. I haven't made my bed in 10 years. Yeah.

Help me. Yeah. Everyone keeps telling me to read that book of his, the 12 rules of life. No, I wouldn't say that's worth to read it. I mean,

yeah, no, it's stupid. Some of his old, I was like 17 when he really started to pop off. And some of his lectures

were kind of interesting of it's the self-hous. It's the self-house. help stuff is kind of cool, but then he's just like, and that's why trans people are going to hell. And you're like, wait a minute. He's buddies with Ben Shapira. It's funny, like, saying, because most people are going to hell, right?

I'd imagine heaven is not, like, a... They never specify, like, how they say these are the rules and you can redempt shit, but it's also funny to think about heaven being, like, extremely exclusive. It's, like, just people's grandmas from, like, one period of time. Yeah. And then, like, babies, just babies and grandparents. on. Yeah, yeah.

Also, people don't bring this up enough or ever, but, like, you know how everyone's interpretation of heaven? It's like clouds and it's in the sky and whatever. Wouldn't it be, like, sopping wet? Because of... All the... Come, what? Because you're...

I don't know. There's sex going on in my heaven. Because you're in, like, a cloud. Oh, wow. I was thinking the cum somehow. What do you think heaven is? Because of all the... Every time you jerk off, I guess.

out of the sperm. Someone in heaven's like, God. You know a priest would have an annoying explanation? She's like, well,

my priest was an Ayurush named Father Walsh. He'd say, no, in heaven nobody needs to come. Your balls are just

always empty. There's always like some explanation like that. It's like, what about food? It's like, you don't need to eat food. I was like, well, I like the feeling

of not having food in the habit. Yeah, yeah. So I like the feeling of blue balls and then jizzing, so I would want that. I also don't like that this is my problem

with the religious side of heaven because you're taught to be nice to people so that you go to heaven. Which is a terrible motivation. It's like a bad because then you're just more, you're being nice people for the wrong reason. And there's not a lot in the Bible about being nice to people.

Most of it is like, don't love anybody but God. It's like if you kill your son, slaughter a lamb first. The closest thing to being nice in a lot of the Bible is like, don't fuck your friend's wife or like, you know, don't. Or your friend's ox. Yeah. I guess I was like second best to a woman back then.

was an ox, big ox. But no, your point, did you finish the point as being nice? Yeah, like, I think you're a better person if you don't believe in heaven and you're nice regardless. Yeah, yeah, but I will, yeah, yeah, I do get that. But then there are a lot of, like,

I think religion provides a great moral compass for some people, though. Even though they're doing it for the wrong reasons, it's like some people just will be a piece of shit unless they think they're going to be punished. I think there's different ways of being a good person. The Catholic one does seem to be very much rooted in like a fear of like going to hell or not making it to heaven or whatever and I think that's

probably the wrong reason to be nice. Yeah. It's because you're like afraid. But then I guess, you know, your first image of father, your father is your dad. Do you guys get fucking spanked and punished or? Oh yeah. I think I got spanked. Yeah. So as a kid you learn the, the way I should behave well is to avoid getting, you know, smacked around. My ass. Yeah. The Bible tells you like the only way to not get fucked in your ass forever is to be nice. Yeah. Well, that's, that's what, uh, I I remember my, I remember my thing was having things getting take away from me. I remember there was one time I remember specifically I was supposed to go to Toys R Us and I fuck

something up. I was like, we're not going to toys. I remember just like, I remember just falling to my knees and I'm like, no! I was like, please, please. They have a Batman car. I want to see the Batman car. Yeah, yeah.

Being like, like, in my mind, that was my first feeling of having something like taken away from me. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? It's like, and that is the same feeling of like a relationship. Like, when my friend, one of my best friends killed himself. That is the same emotional response. It's like, you're not going to Toys R-R-R-R-R-R-A.

Yeah, yeah, it was the same. The stakes are higher, but in your brain, your adjustment level is the same. In my mind, because I was calling my friend's mom, I was like, no, no, no, no, please, please, please, please. She's like, so-and-so's dead. And also, you're not going to Toys Rouse. I'm like, no. Yeah, dude, you need that. Like, my big thing was, like, the first thing that got me, I,

Watch the Simpsons secretly with my sister. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My mom gave us an apple for dessert. That was our punishment. And that was it, dude. I was like, no Swiss cake roll. That was my favorite, dude. You open up, there's two.

You peel the chocolate off and you peel the layers. I've never had a Swiss cake roll. Never had one? Very good. No, yeah. We were, uh, yeah, we were like a weird, uh, I don't know, we were, my parents were weird. So, like, I was like, I wasn't a lot to watch the Simpsons. That was a thing I remember. But I just eventually got to an age

where my parents would leave and I would just watch all kinds of garbage in the TV. Like I was just find my way around stuff and then I would just hang out with people and watch shit on there. But they had weird rules where I couldn't watch Ninja Turtles.

I couldn't watch Nickelodeon just because it was... Some people had this card to network just because it was weird. Yeah. Which is weird because it was weird because Carton Network was way weirder. But I remember telling my parents

I quoted Grim Adventures of Billiam Andy and I was like, lick my butt or something my parents. Like, you're never watching my show again. I'm like, where did you hear that was like, the grim adventures of Billy and They were like, you can't watch.

I was like, no. This is my favorite. I was just like the anger. I was like, how am I going to know what happens when this Jamaican Grim Reaper is a friend of old girl? I was like,

this is so frustrating. But then they were like, what else couldn't I watch? I remember I... Fairly odd parents. We got the boot on that one. For religious reasons? Yeah, I don't know why.

There's nothing bad. I think it's kind of SpongeBob too is another big one I remember kids being like, because SpongeBob is so quoted now that whenever somebody's like, I didn't grow up watching SpongeBob. my parents went aloud.

I'm like, dude, that sucks, dude. But it's funny, like, I just see, like, a conservative Southern dad being like, that's not right. You don't have a fucking sponge talking to people like that. A squirrel can't live in the ocean. Women can't be scientists. Boy, this Patrick guy's pretty stupid.

What does he live under a rock? Oh, shit, he does. Dude, you just fucking blew my mom. You never got that. Then there's the other side of it. There's, like, the cuntinute. northeastern intellectual version of it's like no my son's not going to be watching SpongeBob he's going to be watching the hit one of my friends grew up in the history channel like

that's so sad that's terrible I would always quote stuff when I was like in middle school he's like I grew up watching history I'm like that's how you raise a proud boy yeah yeah you don't understand that if you just like give people enough history they become a Nazi yeah they just become like someone they find out the root of every problem throughout history because the problem is everything revolves around like white people being awesome yeah it's like oh shit we that too. Yeah, it is funny too because it's like I think they almost have ancient aliens

and they're just to kind of break it up a little bit. They're like, alright, let's kind of get them on this side of conspiracy. Like, it's almost like they're like, you guys need at least play four hours of non-9-11 conspiracies just to get them kind of a certain thing. Which we watched the fucking best episode of that.

Me, my buddy, we took some edibles and we watched, first of I watched some Christmas movie and it was, um, I brought up the best point. Every fucking Christmas movie they're always like, uh, in any Christmas movie where Santa exists the parents don't believe in Santa but that makes who's putting the presents

yeah it makes no fucking sense they're like I don't know I guess and I don't think anything has ever attempted to explain it like if they don't explain like oh they're hypnotized or like they see that would make sense yeah if it's like a hypnosis thing where they Santa also plants memories of them

that would be a cool let's write this down or the parents actually know that he's real and they're telling the kids I mean that would make sense because it's a sci op The only thing that makes it not make sense is the parents are saying they know he's not real. Like they tell the kids like, sorry, Santa's not real even though he is. But there's presence. But there should be a movie where it's like, no, San is just real.

All the parents know it. Yeah, that makes way more sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because every movie, there's always the doubting parents. Like, what is the fucking, the Tim Allen one where the psychiatrist is like, yeah, Santa? Like, I believe in that. He's just a total asshole.

Yeah, and he got like 50 pounds fatter. And he's like, I think I'm Santa. Yeah, yeah. You're not Santa. Yeah, you're just a fucking. fat fucking loser. It would be funny if it was in like a universe where they didn't believe Santa was real,

but they thought like Epstein and everything was like real. It was just Epstein dropping off his gifts, trying to lure people in. Dude, I will say this. So first off, I want to pull this article up with Epstein. I got this today and I was like, I've never been more excited about anything in my life.

There is a George Floyd Epstein conspiracy theory going around. Oh yeah, I saw that. He was on the island? Yes. No, no. This is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. Okay. George Floyd was killed

because he was going to expose Epstein Island. You know, it was actually the little boys come in his ass that killed him. Wait, wait, I don't want to hear this out. Why? As you can see here, George and his friends are holding up the number three. This is always starts to be a number-related thing

and the numbers never really line up. Yeah, yeah. first off, you can't even, they even cut off his hands, you can't even see that he's holding the number three. As you can see here,

George and his friends are holding up the number three. With both hands, the number 33 is the famous Mason number 33. The number 33 is the highest rank in the Freemason order. Was George Floyd a Freemason?

As you can see below, George Floyd is also involved in amateur porn show called Habib Show. In the show, he claims to be six foot. Numerology 6-6 means, love and loyalty, something that he proved

later unlike the free mason's George only fucked adults. This is pretty airtight so far. I decided to do some research. Of course, he did. Pretty airtight, much like the kneeling that not a lot of air

seeking through. I decided to do research on his would-be killer, Mr. Derek Chauvin, and was only stunned to say the least. Mr. Derek Chauvin. It turns out that Mr. Chauvin had a TV show on Discovery channel called the cash cab. Wait. What is it going on? Derek Chauvin, oh my God. He's the host of the cash cab. That's the other guy. Wait, wait, wait a second. It's saying, Ben Bailey. This conspiracy is

that Ben Bailey is Jerry Scha. Now, honestly, I never even saw the resemblance. They do look. The level of very close. Where you said, no, no, no, no. Ben Bailey from Cash Cab is also Derek Chauvin and murdered George Floyd so that Ebsty want to get revealed. Now let's look at the new word. I think this is all based on. Okay, that's all it goes into, but that is fucking hilarious. Yeah, that would be the most beautiful bow on the whole George Floyd thing. Like, how would, like, liberals respond to that?

They're like, I don't understand anything anymore. Yeah, yeah. Stick a gut on my fucking mouth. That's incredible. I will say this with the Epstein stuff. I feel really bad for him. No, no, no, no, no. For people that are friends with Epstein.

Because I don't have any pedophile friends, but I have a lot of degenerate friends. And having the answer for their actions is the most annoying thing. Yeah. So the fact, and also like, these politicians were Epstein's party friends. Your party friends are literally your most degenerate friends. Like, if you're getting judged by everybody you've done cocaine with, like, it's like literally like the most annoying thing. It's like they probably like just went to parties with Epstein and he had like good coke.

And then it's like now the person you barely hung out with, you're getting like seriously. And he probably, I don't know, he probably was a party machine. He probably tore it up on the fucking dance board. Yeah. dude. He definitely knew like all of the electric slides.

Yeah, yeah. You guys call him Jeffrey Epstanky leg. He was like kid dancey's like head, shoulders,

he's in toes. He, but like that's the case because he was a guy who would come up to like famous people. Like he would approach them. Yeah.

So in your mind, you're just like, dude, I'm Vindusel. Yeah. I'm just doing cool action movies. And it's like, dude,

you want to come to my party and have chicken fights with models? And it's just you and Epstein. guys got like hot legal age women on your shoulder and then you know I bet you walking in like you ever I've walked in on people doing drugs at a party like I remember in high school I walked upstairs people were snorting coding and there's that weird reaction

we're like oh I wasn't supposed to see it's like Michael Sarah and Superbeth yeah yeah that's what probably happens to everything you walk in and next thing you know like Bill Clinton's like bang a 15 year old we're like fuck yeah you're like whoa yeah you're like yeah you're like what the fuck that like the amount of times you've been to a party you say I don't know what the fuck I walked in on it has to be it happens all the time there yeah I mean but if Patty was fucking kids, despite how close to her, wouldn't your first reaction to be,

like, not like, I'm fucking barely knew the dude. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Yeah, who?

Other than the hours and hours of recorded fun. That would be the funniest interview ever is cutting between the interview of you going like, yeah, I was like, I didn't really know the guy.

He was like kind of a friend and then it's like, dude, I would die for you. Like, you're my day, it's just me on the podcast. Like,

I fuck, chill, yeah. Recreationally. I'm glad you're not doing it medically It's Michael going like I never He never mentioned anything about fucking kids And so it's like so we'd get them in the room

So I get them in there and then I remember When I sent you that photo And then yeah Well that was the funny is I had the pedophile hunter The podcast and one thing I was just sort of like Bring up to him I was like well a lot of people get too excited about pedophile And then they're all just like jerking off to pedophiles being hunted He's like I don't know who comes to pedophiles being hunted

And then I saw a clip from a different podcast He goes dude if I caught an Epstein level pedophile I would come fucking I'm so badly want to clip it up. I like the guy, but it's just a funny thing to like the exact thing

you're saying. There's footage of you saying. But, if Michael murdered somebody would you help him? If he was defensible, but if he was, if it was like,

if you did it in a way that nobody knew, like a hide the body scenario, and it wasn't like, no, I wouldn't. Yeah, yeah,

yeah, you shouldn't help him hide body. It's always a thing. Every, every fucking guy who watches too many, like, uh,

I don't know, motivational videos and too many entertainment videos is like, bro, I'd take a fucking bullet for my friends. I would fucking bury a body. It's like, why would you do immoral? Like, it's like, it's not how. Yeah.

Yeah, it's also funny where I've heard the fucking Andrew tape guys be like, if your friends get in to fight, I jump in immediately. It's like, no questions asked. I'm like, dude, my friend started the fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Most of the time, my friend starts the fucking fight. Dude, if my, it would have to be something like not, like, if it was, if you were like, dude, I just got angry and smashed a vase over her head

or whatever, I'd be like, I can't do this. You say her red? I can only kill a woman What's in there? Are you killing an adult male? But if it was like a like a blue choo related accident or something?

What do you mean? I take so much blue chute that I kill a woman? Yeah, you take so much blue chute your dick like explodes inside of her. He comes like a shotgun. Yeah, you caught her head just explode. Oh God.

Should have got the Sildanafil. Or whatever. If it was something like that, I would consider it. Yeah. I would certainly, even if you told me, I would never snitch, dude. Yeah, well, I don't know how that works with, like, knowing somebody killed somebody. Like, do you have to immediately, if you don't know who they killed, somebody is just like, I've killed somebody, do you have to tell?

Because I've heard multiple people just tell me, like, I've killed somebody. Yeah, yeah. Just people. Yeah. What, too? Just people, like, people you can't ask who. Yeah. I'm assuming they're in jail now.

Not like close friends, but, like, you just hear somebody who's, like, bragging. Like, especially, like, knowing people from the streets are like, I've killed the motherfucker. Yeah, I guess also there's probably a lot of Southern dudes, too, or, like, brag about the self-defense scenario that they've got into somehow of like, yeah, you know, they're like, yeah, some dude was on my property and I fucking, you know. Yeah, I've heard a lot of like, like, it's

mostly hood people, like black and white who are like, I've killed the motherfucker. And then I'm like, all right, well, like, like, what? I was like, I don't know. I don't know the motherfucker that was killed. There was a- Like, I've heard a hood white guy, I'd be like, yeah, I've killed so many motherfuckas. And I'm like, I don't know if this is true. And I don't know,

by the way, there's zero reason we'd purring race into that, I realize. but um because i feel like who gives a fuck but it's like but it's like i don't know who they killed so am i supposed to go like you know what i mean it's like yeah yeah and also somebody's bragged about killing somebody it's like how much do you know you could always play i thought they were bragging i thought they were trying to get clout yeah yeah yeah yeah even though he's like yeah i shot the governor you're like i'm sure you did pal like you don't know if that's necessarily a real thing there was a kid i went to high school with who uh is in prison now because he was driving drunk and he drove off the road and hit like a bank

and he flew into the second story of a house and killed a person in their bedroom in the house. That's crazy. So this person was just in their bed and a fucking car flew in on the second floor and killed him in the middle of the night. That's wild. Like they died quickly,

but like that's a, like there's a picture and there's just a car sticking out of the house. That's nuts. Yeah, and he bragged about all the time. Whenever he had a car flying, a picture, more than a feeling.

It's always the thing. It's free bird solos playing. Yeah, it must have been pretty gnarly for a few seconds while you're in the air and you're like, holy shit. Yeah, yeah. Wait, so he killed them and where? I'm a confused. They landed, he landed where? He landed like through the face of the house on the second story. Oh, shit.

And just like into a bedroom. And you knew the guy? Yeah, I went to high school with him. Oh, wow. Did you ever see that comment that he would be into that kind of? You know, definitely didn't see it coming the person in the fucking bedroom. Dude, the second you see the fucking hood of a car, like, what the dog? Are those?

You're like, you're like, this is a crazy dream. Do you know who it was? It was like an old lady or something? I don't know. I think it was like a younger person. I think it was like someone who wasn't even 18. He's a dude jerking off. Yeah.

The first time they ever watched child porn. The perfect scenario. Just nipping it right where it starts. Yeah, that's a beautiful ed dude. Yeah, that's so crazy. Yeah, I've only been, had one person like enter my room. in the middle of the night. It is the scariest fucking way. It was my roommate. It was the first night I was in my new apartment and I put on like, I was watching Game of Thrones on my TV and I was just

high as shit like in my bed and that's like the most ideal scenario to ever exist just sitting there like chilling like oh nice. And my roommate, I didn't realize this but before I moved in, it was Tommy. He like unlocked the window. So he just like went outside and just like climbed up on the side and just lifted the window open and jumped in. And I just screamed. It was the funniest fucking thing ever. That's so terrified. Like, my dad did that when I was,

they came to visit me when I was going to the breakup. And my dad had like this sleep mask on. And he went and he reached over to like close my laptop in the middle of the night. And I just thought like Davy Jones. I was just like, it's the scariest fucking thing in the world. Did your parents or siblings over a sleepwalk or did you? We all did.

I'd go pissing. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, peeing is crazy. I took a shower in my sleep, fully naked. Wow. You woke up in the shower? I woke up in the shower naked and you're so confused when you wake up.

Yeah, because you're there with another man. I was sleep gay sexing. And my mom, she's like, are you in the shower, Patty? And I was like, yes. And then I fell back asleep and I woke up in my bed dry and had no memory of it. The ghost, towelts you down. And then the next day, my mom was like, did you take a shower? shower last night and I was like holy shit

I did yeah yeah we all slept while it's why I'm always scared when I take Ambien that I'll do stuff like that and nothing ever that crazy how like I've taken it a bunch of times and like when you walk around I mean I guess maybe I just don't know maybe I like yeah you wouldn't know yeah yeah is the you crash into it's

two story house is the is the is the shower thing the craziest thing you did when you're sleepwalking uh yeah yeah that's I think so I would pee in thing like I peed in like the hamper and the trash. I clearly was dirty and was not.

So I could be the trash can and the hamper, which aren't like bad. That's a crazy memory my brother had. And it was, I never shared it because I thought it was like almost so disturbing in my mind. But then the more sleepwalking things, the more normal this seems is my brother was sleeping. This is his story.

And my mom just like went into the fucking, just like pull out one of his drawers. And he's like, what are you doing? And she's just sleepwalking just like, oh, it's that. And then like, fucking. hold their pants and I started pissing in his drawer. You're like, yeah, and he's like, mom, mom.

I wish his mom's drawer. Yeah. And I'm like, dude, it sucks because I wish I was there. But it always disturbed me and then I remember to, it's so funny. This is how I'm describing my mom. She's a very wonderful woman, but she does drink. She does drink a lot. And then I realize, there was a rub my cock.

There's a lot of people that, like, they'll get super fucked up and then start pissing. And then I didn't know that that was like a common thing. Oh, yeah. I like P. There's a lot of videos of me. It's P-O-V. like you'll see like a

emphasis on the pee you see a garden dome and you won't know what's going on then all of a sudden you see a stream of piss just hit in the face like I just take all these P of you one where you just see like

a bush and the next thing you know you see sh urine spraying out and me just like I'm a fucking uh dude I had this discovery when I was home

because I've always had a we've always been a bar of soap house growing up that's so I didn't realize how disgust because even now I'm a bar of soap guy because of that

but when I was home I was like using the bar of soap and I was like realizing like this has been all over my mom's pussy and I was like ooh yeah but then like then I thought back to like when I was a child and I used a curse word

and like she put in your mask like she might as well like if I said fuck she might as well just been like all right Patty fucking did you kiss your parents in the lips and you're a young young boy Kiss his mom and his pussy lips. We never even, like, really hugged that much.

Oh, really? Very not physical touch. Is that why you like intimacy now? Because he likes intimacy now. Like, oh, this is never what my parents gave me. It's not an insult, but the dude, this motherfucker likes intimacy. I know. He's always trying to bring me.

Yeah, I have this weird lack of intimacy. Dude, this motherfucker likes kissing and hugging a shit. Yeah. By the way, I, I, I, this has been the back of my mind. I don't, I mean, just explain this. I'm what you would call a love faggot. That's a little redundant. No, I don't know anybody who's killed anybody.

I'm genuinely talking about like very bar people. Like people you meet at a bar. Yeah, yeah. I've killed the motherfucker. Not like somebody I know personally. Or people who have... Well, even if you did, I wouldn't even judge. I mean, like, you get your boys, your boys.

I know. I have no friends with that. It's more like I've seen somebody on Instagram, like, saying, like, I've killed a motherfucker. Or like, somebody, like, at a bar just saying, like, literally nobody in my personal. Yeah. When I went to college, I went to a community college for two years. And there was a lot of people who,

served in the military who would then go to that school. I take that back. I know a veteran killed somebody. I was going to say, there was this guy I met, he was like 32 when I met him, and he was telling me they, in like, they were using this like high caliber guy. I think it was like a 50 caliber rifle, which I guess when you're in war, there's like a code of conduct where you're only supposed to use a rifle of that caliber on like equipment and machinery and whatever like vehicles.

but they would totally ignore that because it's war and who gives a fuck. And he said one time he shot a guy in the head and he just like shot it and he just watched his head disappear in like a pink cloud. And like after they do that, they have to like debrief and be like, all right, so like what happened?

He was like, I was aiming for a tank. They're like, there really wasn't a tank nearby. It's like, yeah, I'm not a great shot. They're like, all right, whatever. Like they don't really care. but they have to like do the due diligence and figure out why. But yeah, the pink cloud thing is fucking crazy.

I mean, so wait, did he, this is someone you were friends with? Or was he was like sharing this in class? Yeah, this was like, what's their Instagram? I don't even remember his name, but he was like, this was in like a physics class.

That's very funny. He's like, the physics of somebody's head exploding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The diameter of the bullet. It's so wide. You can see the skull explode out of the back of their head. I mean, I would. would like to, I guess, ask somebody who's willing to share what that experience or how much it fucks you up.

Dude, I've heard a mix. I've heard of some people who've killed people in, like, war and they are way too braggidosis about it. Yeah. And they're like, I think it's actually the only thing I was ever good at. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the only time I ever felt alive. Yeah, it's got to be crazy to be in like the, like, whatever war. Was the Vietnam War?

There was like a lot of fire, right? A lot of fire fights. What? A lot of guns and stuff, right? Yeah, yeah, and fire. I don't know if that one was like All like Asian orange and shit I think that was there was one war where they actually shot

They killed with flamethrowers I think that may have been war one or two I think it was two yeah So fucking cool dude to kill some crazy That's so badass But it's gotta be crazy to like see like Like be killing Vietnamese people And then like live in New York City

And you just see a and then everyone hates you Because you're not welcomed back Everybody's like It probably like triggers a response where you're like I gotta kill this guy and then you're like, no, no, no, no. This is F-A-O Schwartz. It's kind of like the thing in jail of people get out of prison

and then have a hard time adjusting to like the regular rules of society and kind of like want to go back in a way. Yeah. I am also thinking of like, you know how there's those like Elvis was in Vietnam? He was in Vietnam, right? But he just like played music or so like that. I like the idea of him being like,

they have like a prisoner of war. He's like, no, let me get him. Like him just like wanting to kill a Vietnamese. He's like, no, let me, let me, let me do one. Let me do one. Just give me one. One, two, three. Yeah. Yeah.

It ain't nothing but a Japanese. Yeah, that's atrocious to think about. The one thing I do, I hate to circle around. Before I forget this, the funniest part about it, we watched Violent Night, which is one of those movies. Oh, that's the David Harbor one? Yeah, it's, what's his name? It was, who's the Hispanic guy?

He played the guy in Spawn. He played the clown in Spahn. Oh, he was Sid from Ice Age. Likwasama? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he's the bad guy in this movie. Basically, the whole movie is they're,

they're breaking into a house to steal a bunch of stuff. Yeah. And it's very funny because the bad guy hates Christmas, which doesn't need to be a plot point at all. It's never explained. He's just like, I fucking hate Christmas while he's like shooting people. Like, why does that have anything to do with it?

They're just to top it off. And there's a point in the movie where he's going to kill Santa Claus, because Santa Claus is like the hero in this movie. And he goes, I've been waiting my whole life for this. It's like, why is that... You got a coal for Christmas. There's no. should have been a flashback.

Exactly. They could have summed up in three seconds. Like he, yeah, that is one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Oh, it was terrible, but just the fact that...

It'd be so funny if, like, been loud in, like, in his, like, manifesto just had a whole section about Santa. Yeah. It's like, why does every bad guy,

like, I hate Chris? It's like, there's no reason. He can just be a bad guy. It's just so funny that you don't know, and, like, he says, I hate Christmas, and then just the very end,

you have no idea what the tension is, but he just goes, I've been waiting my whole life for this to kill Santa Claus. It's fucking insane. Is he raped by Frosty the Snowman? It's possible. He made me wear the hat. There's plenty of people that hate Christmas.

We talk about shit end of the stick is when Frosty fingers your ass. That was good. I was going to say something about Jews hating Christmas, but I kind of don't think that's why they don't do it. Yeah, I don't think they hate. That is a very funny theory people who are like they just don't like Christmas That's not why they

Yeah If you say Christmas They don't even do it I wonder if Greta Thunberg hates Frosty Because his eyes are not Made out of sustainable material You know

Maybe or she's trying to save Frosty She doesn't want him to melt She definitely thinks Santa's real Yeah Greta for sure That's why she's trying to keep the earth cold Yeah She's like

What about the reindeer Ain't all the reindeer Game I like that you're also another part of this movie Rudolph wasn't in it and are there weird copyright reasons to not have because he's not in other movies besides Rudolph

he's the only reindeer like he's the only one the prominent one yeah we're joking about him just being like hard to work with like we don't want to fuck it. Yeah he's a real pre-Madana. He's doing too much coke his nose wasn't work at that. Yeah it was an issue but afterwards we watched dude it was so much age and aliens

is every single time the fun of show ever. We watched one on Star You know a Stargate, it's like a portal into like... The whole whole theory of a Stargate is that like basically you walk through it and you go to the other side of a... So a wormhole is different in the black hole. Black hole just collapses. Yeah. A wormhole.

This is all based off of me watching it. Stargate is like a kind of... It's a portal. Yeah. A portal to another dimension? Or just to the other side of the wormhole. So most of the time it would be like another dimension or on the other side of the galaxy. It's like a more efficient wormhole, right?

Like kind of... No, it's just the entrance to a wormhole. Oh, okay. Yeah. So it's like... I don't know what any... and that shit even eat is, you know. Well, are they saying, are they describing things

that they're saying is real or, like, theoretically real? So wormholes are theoretically real. Yeah. Like, but, but I guess just theoretically. I don't know enough. I just watch this on ancient aliens. But it was very funny because, like, it's always like an ancient site.

They're always like Machu Picchu. There's a Stargate here. And the funniest one they said is they're like, they're like, a lot of people feel that there's a star gate at Machu Beach. So I was like, feel, that is, you could not have sounded less, it's funny because you could be like,

a lot of people theorize, A lot of people believe you're like, doesn't it feel like there's a Stargate here? It's funny that, yeah, there's never a Stargate and like a Popeye's. Yeah. Hey, is that shit open again? I thought I had another one.

We were just joking about that in general, just being like, just like at Machia Beach, you're like, excuse me, is there Stargate, it kind of feels like there's a Stargate. Just asking people at 7-Eleven, like, do you guys have a Stargate? Can you ask the man? Can you even make sure there's not a Stargate?

Stargate near me. Yeah, yeah. and then just think yeah it was just very funny to hear all that and then like think about a guy paying so much for an apartment he's like yeah of course like $3,000 seems like a lot

but they got a start but when you factor in the Stargate it's not even worth it and then it's like a guy a guy walking to work all cocky he's like because the beginning

they're like a Stargate could open any day now we picture a guy walking to the office like oh how's my week pretty good Stargate's about to open go to this dude that would be an incredible

idea for a show is a guy who rents an apartment and it's got like a portal into another dimension in there. And like, people like use the portal. So there's like all these people coming in. So there's just like Abraham Lincoln coming in and stuff like that. Yeah, coming in. Yeah, yeah.

Well, it reminds me of the plot of your see being John Malcovic. It's like a dude works at, it gets this job where there's, he finds like a secret little cubby where you go inside and you get to live as John Malcovich for like 24 hours. Oh wow. And so then he basically starts advertising it and people start paying to live as John Malcovich. And it's like a fucking, I don't

you remember where it goes. I was really high when I watched it. But there is like, that is. He does this with movies. By the way, just to cut you off, we were watching Kiss Kiss Kiss, Bang, Bang. And I'm really high.

And this is the second time seeing it. He had no idea what was going on. Well, no, the first time I saw it. I didn't know either. I'm the same way. I was watching it again and not know what's going. Well, it was Christmas. And I was, it was one of those where you're 13 and you watch.

And also still like it. It's still good. But it's just such a complicated plot that I'm like, don't even care. It's funny. It's kind of like, there's a couple of movies I have like that. I like them and I don't need to know what's going on. I'm sorry. That was a terrible interjection on my part of that.

No, no. I think, well, there was one fucking, I forget the point I had with Kiss Kiss Kisses Bang. But no, the John Malcovic movie is the same concept. I'm the same way with movies, though. Like, if I don't watch it in a theater, I don't, like, remember what happened. I need to, like, be in a theater. I was just trying to lock down this apartment.

For the people that know, me and Padriac are moving in together. Yes. And it was the most stressed. Like, in my mind, I was like, I was like, because for like our other roommate, you're sub-leasing your place. You already have somebody to fill it. For our other roommate, he, uh, he's like, sub-leasing in a couple months. Yeah, so he's fine.

He's chilling. Well, me and you are freaking, I was like literally like, I don't have a place to stay. I was looking up weird Craigslist places where it's like, hey, we're a family, but I swear to God, we're not weird. you can have our room and I'm like, all right, I guess I might. You're just sleeping like with the grandma. Just some terrible scenario. Yeah, you were telling me there was one before.

There was like an advertisement for like, uh, it's like a nudist guy. Yeah, nudist guy. Yeah, he's like, as long as you're cool. And cool meant like as long as you don't mind seeing my ass. Yeah. It's not the ass. I'm worried about it.

Yeah. As long as you don't have a bigger dong than me. Because then you're the head nudist by rule of law. Dude, that's, yeah, that's something that I don't know. It's like, that's, that's gonna be so weird being a nudist in New York. So first off, your nudist, just don't look for fucking roommates. Find other fucking nudists. Yeah, yeah.

It's not that hard to find here. Actually, that might be a fun person to have on the podcast. But how does it work? It's like, if you go to the store, you, like, what is, it's just you just like to be naked. I like to be naked, too, but I choose, you know what I mean? It's like. I would imagine they just walk around the house naked. But I do that.

So I'm a nudist technically. Yeah, I feel like a nudist. Go to a colony where you fucking belong. I feel like a new piece of shit. Yeah, get out of you. I feel like a nudist, that means you like go to the bank naked. Yeah, yeah.

But you can't legally do, so I don't know, like, yeah. Unless you have like a certification. You're like, I'm allowed to show your child my penis. I'm technically a nudist. Are you guys comfortable with your naked body? Yeah, yeah, yeah, for the most part, yeah.

I mean, if I fluff it a little bit, I need a flick. I need to kind of pull the head. No, I've had so many doctors look at my dick, and for most of them, I would fluff it up. And it's just male doctors being like, I can't let him see my tiny dick. A weak dick.

No, I hate my naked body. In general, because with the lady, I don't even care, but if it's with, like, anybody else, then I'm, I can't. Do you think it's because the lady's seeing it, like, hard? Yeah, well, even my flaccid dick for a while, I wouldn't want girls to see. Oh, totally. That is fair.

And not even, like, I'll go up to use the bathroom with my flaccid dick out, but I wouldn't want the blanket off, just flaccid dick, just, like, hanging to one side. I would want to, like, kind of cover that up. Now I'm cool with it. See, once I've had sex them, I don't care, because it's like you've already seen the full potential. Yeah, yeah.

You've seen what I can become. You've seen me at my worst. Exactly six inches, maybe even 5.9. My dick can get... My full potential is... Yeah, I don't... I don't have any issues with my body. I actually love my body.

Like, I'm, like, confident about my body. Like, even though I probably shouldn't be. But I hate being naked. I just, like, hate... See, on the opposite, I'm not that kind of, but I love being naked. Like, I love it. But I think it's because I have a serious...

I don't know what is... I have a serious attention brought where I just want... I crave... I crave it so much. Like, I've put sparklers between my butt cheeks so many times. Yeah. There's a video of me doing one time.

And then somebody goes, he does this all the time. You can hear somebody saying, he does this all the time. Oh, that's the move. Dude, yeah, just get naked. I picture you, like, having sex, and there's, like, a spotlight hanging from the sun. Just on your penis. The show must go on. Dude, there's pictures of me.

Like, there's one I have where my dick's got glasses on it. That's great. I got one. My ex, there's this video of me where I would draw. I took her phone and I took all these videos with me putting I had a marker

and drew a face on my dick and I would interrogate it and I'd be like where's the money it's like I don't know and then I put it in one and her like and then there's a picture of me

I'm gonna show you guys you can't see my dick but it's it's wonderful all right then don't show it to me no no this is wonderful we went to go see triple X with Vin Diesel and um

tough name for a movie yeah um no no let me pull this up I'm wearing a bald cap and it's kind of great because you can see, you can't see my penis. Give me one second. You got to hide so we don't actually see the other pictures of your penis in your phone. Yeah, there's a lot of weird stuff here. I think it's under IMG.

Have you ever seen? Oh yeah, look at this one. You can't see my penis, but people can't see. I'm wearing sunglasses, a bald cap, and I have a glass of wine covering my day. So it's me shirtless, glass of wine, bald cap, and sunglasses. That's beautiful. I'm keeping like the straightest face too. So I look like Vin Diesel just holding it.

My friends have, there's pictures of me from college because I would like, we'd all be drinking and I'd leave the room like silently and come back on with just a wig like a big crazy wig and just totally naked. I'd just be like,

oh, it's going on. But then they take pictures. Dude, the camera ruined all the fun, dude. Well, that was my thing with the,

I have one ball and that was my like party trick of showing people my one ball. It was a sick party trick. It's showing people on one ball, but multiple people, including Joseph and Sebel, that took pictures of it. And it's not even like I care that they're having a picture of me,

like a nude part of my body. It's that the value of showing my ball goes down so much. Yes, yes, exactly. I'm not the one who gets to decide who gets to see my ball. Because there's just a picture. So I'm like, you delete that. I'm not showing it to you again. Not to like call back,

but that's the thing I felt about my grandfather after all this. because all of these people told me these stories about them. And one of them was like he bought like a headstone for this boy who choked on a hot dog. And like his dad couldn't afford it. I'm like yeah, because he was eating a hot dog. But like you learn stuff about that about people and it makes them more interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because like if I bought a headstone, I'd be like, oh, only $400.

Like I would be posting about it. Oh, like some love. Well, yeah. Especially kids nowadays where not only, only just every aspect of their personality is online, but every embarrassing thing they've ever posted is going to be online too. So at their funeral

they're just playing like their TikTok lip syncs and they're smoking like out of a bong and it's like, oh God, that's what he was doing. Dude, it was terrible. I told you I had the N-word on my Instagram until like four years ago and I had no idea because it's from when I was like 15. And doing blackface. A picture of me with like my friend

had a... The N-word is just a picture of his friend who's black. Yeah. I wish I didn't spit everyone. I didn't realize it happened so much. Picture of Martin Luther King. I'm on Martin Luther King Day. But it was like my friend had like a squirrel named Alvin from Alvin the Chimpmunks.

I'm like hanging with my N word of Alvin. That's really funny. And it was there for so long until like one of my friends scolded me. And that's when I was like, all right. You know, obviously I can't say it. And then I was like, oh, wow. I was like, this could not be on my Instagram. Yeah.

You're like, oh, sorry. And you're like, my N word. And then you're like, I'm not allowed to say his name. Keeping his identity. But it was like, and it was so hard not to look at who liked it. And I was like, all right, a couple black guys liked the post. Yeah, I'm chill. But whenever, what is it?

My argument with that is I'll just defend it. You wouldn't fuck a 15 year old. So don't judge 15 year old. My brain was not developed. Yeah. But what was it? Yeah, like, whenever I give a homeless guy money, I'm just like begging somebody, So hoping somebody walks by it.

I watched you do that. I was very impressed. I saw you give money to a homeless guy. I thought because you were there. Dude, you weren't there on his business face. I've also seen you do that. And I'm like, oh, very nice.

Yeah, keep talking about it on the podcast. I don't mind. When somebody took his podcast? One time I touched a homeless guy. Accidentally. And I fucking hit it and dude, my hand stunk. I forget who I was with someone who was like, we need to wash our hands.

And I was like, oh yeah, I guess I should. Thank God, whoever I was with was like, we should watch that because I would have just roamed around with a stinky homeless hand. I don't know if it's just going to sting from touching it. It did stink. I smelled it. I was like, that stinks. Have you ever, have you lived in New York for three years, you said?

Yeah, since the beginning of 2020. Where did you move from? Upstate New York. Okay. Well, yeah, I don't know. I've never seen homeless. I had to get used to like the homeless thing. I only moved here like six months ago.

And it is, it can be really depressing. if you pay attention to it. And I'm not used to it from... Orlando had some crackheads, but New York was like, there's one guy I walked by him today at work. Pretty much every day at work, I walk by a guy who's just a same exact spot

on the subway station, just scratching, like, either part of his leg or in his pants on his ass. And I'm just like, dude, there's some fucked... I'm like, I want to give money to all of them, but I also am like, I don't... There's nothing that you can, like, do about it. No, no.

And it's also interesting, too, to think about it. Because think about how... Like, I got a rash recently from the antibiotics I was taking. And think about, like, if you're sleeping in your own filth, how many rashes you normally get, and then you're also on crack. Oh, yeah, I thought it was the drugs,

but I guess, yeah, it might also be how you could smell them feet away. No, no, it's definitely the crack. It's definitely the crack. But it's like, the combination has to be like the, that has to feel so good to have, like, just the worst rash and you're high on crack and your scratch. Because apparently it feels so good to scratch on crack. Well, scratching, yeah, if you have, like,

a mosquito bed or something you scratch, there is, like, the momentary sensation of, like, oh, fuck, yeah, I'm alleviation. that sensation. Oh, dude, picking scabs when you're fucking meth down. It's like the body's way of giving you something to do. Yeah, yeah. It's the same thing with trimming your nails.

I'm like, thank God we got a little game to play. I'm bored of shit. Because that was like before. I have like a theory that that's why we have fingernails because like we didn't have phones and shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But some people are like, oh, if you don't have fingernails, you could never pick anything up. I'm like, that's just not true. But to be fair, I don't know, there are all those things, though, that like, I've, I've,

wearing gloves picking up chicks before. Just so, baby girl, how you doing? What's that? Oh, that's just, I'm just keeping my pussy hand. Dude, what movie was that?

That was, uh, what's that story with the giant retarded guy who kills the bunny and then jokes the woman? Of mice and men. Yeah, of mice and men. The head, like, the guy who runs the farm

has a glove, he's like, this is my love making hand from my woman. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, that's the second time I've made a reference to that, and I had no idea.

Yeah, I've done it. What was the other one we were talking about shooting a retarded guy in the back of the head? No, it was about like squeezing rabbits or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like killing rabbits. Yeah, that like started a stereotype that retarded people squeeze rabbits now.

Yeah. Which I don't know if that's... Well, have you ever seen a retarded magician? That's a great point. For my next twig. There was a kid with Denson who used to eat for the ants off the ground. He was like he was their god.

It's just a retarding of the... I've eaten it. Now I'm just right. and now I'll make my rabbit disappear. He's just like, he turns into like a cube. Like he's like some sort of like X-Men villain. He's just a cube rat squished.

Yeah, I'm going to make it disappear. Just throws it across the way. Yeah, that was funny because I was talking to a woman the other night. I was talking to this woman I was on day with it. She's like, you're kind of autistic. And I was like, yeah, okay. And then afterwards she left. I went to bed watching Batman the Anerner.

made it serious. I was like, God, hard thing to argue. But people use that too often. I was like, there's no way I have autism. Yeah, autism is like, it's kind of like the new like not depressed, but like something like along that line where people are like,

it's like a pride, it's a badge of pride now to be autistic. I do you think the umbrella of what's considered autistic has probably grown a lot in terms of someone can appear very normal and yet fall under the spectrum. Whereas before you assumed autism was like, you know,

like fucking crazy rain man type person. Well, that's also the interesting part because it's like, all, yeah, go ahead. Like all the furry animal kids,

like, were they always just there in different forms? Like, like, I know Mullen has that bit about like slave collectors used to be like,

that's like the same as whatever. But I wonder like if like, genuinely thinking about like black and white times, like what was the, like, do those people just not exist? Or is there more,

like, what is it? Like, what was that version of the kids who were like, I don't know, just the kids who like are obsessed, they have like one of those little furry tales. Like that's not...

Yeah. I would imagine they didn't make it very far. I would have guessed it's like... They just probably kept fucking the dog and they're like, you gotta stop fucking... I think they were the guys who'd get shot at the back of the head

or they, you know... Or that was like... I bet the bullying was crazy in like the 1800s. Oh yeah, yeah. The bullies were probably nuts. Yeah, thinking about like 20s bowling. Just like,

Ah, Finkelstein. It's coming by here. Ha! Yeah. Well, it's very, like, or maybe they just, like, had to become, like, maybe, like, Oppenheimer, like, maybe Albert Einstein, too.

We always think of him as, like, this pussy around, but maybe he was, like, just, like, maybe he was, like, yeah, where's he from again, Germany? Yeah, or Austria or something. All the greats are from Austria. Well, we also have a way to connect in a way that we never have,

whereas somebody back then, it's not like you innately know that you have a thing for dressing up like a horse how hard is it to fit in back then when everybody's just wearing the same shit. Like it'd be so easy popular. Like, I guess I'll wear a suit too.

And I'm talking like this. And they're like, yeah, okay, I guess we're all normal. Yeah, I don't, I have no idea how, uh, dude, I have no idea. And then one guy shows up on a petty farthing. Like there's, like, get them. Yeah. I have no idea how they all didn't just kill themselves. Yeah, yeah.

It's like you either spend all day in the mind to like get a grain of rice for your family. It's like, no, just fucking kill yourself. Yeah, well, I think that is probably like a, a, the, reason they didn't kill themselves. I think now you're seeing people who are more depressed because they don't have much of a struggle. And back then, there wasn't like a, God, I'm sad, you know, nobody was walking out being like, I'm so like, I don't know what to do with my life. I think it's like, what's the point of living? I don't think the point of living question came up when they were

like rubbing soot out of their eyes and like two of their kids just died. There was no like photos of Doja Cat to make you feel bad about your body. What a bunch of pussies, am I right? Were those teenage girls killing the world? Yeah, I think the more comfort you have, the more the rate of suicide goes up. Whereas I think if you do have more of a thing to struggle about, it's not, it's almost like you don't even have time to. Maybe that's why a teen suicide. Because teen suicide is really interesting to think about because it's like, I'm very empathetic with suicide.

But for some reason when I hear teen suicide, I just think pus. Like in my head immediately, I'm like, you haven't had life hit you. But then it's like, I don't. But it's like you're- Do you think your level of sadness when you were first experienced, experiencing like adolescent sadness is comparable to like any kind of sad you feel now. I don't know because it's the same thing. I think it's the same equivalences before.

Like the Toys R Us thing was like devastating to me. But also I've had like multiple friends friends and that's devastating. In my mind, I responded with the same amount of feeling. Yeah. But I got over it faster because I realized I was like, oh, I can go to Toys R Us. My friends aren't coming back. We were talking about like a breakup is kind of comparable to like real grief or like. Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Yeah. Breakup is like worse, I think. Well, it's greeting someone's still alive. Yeah. Especially now, they're like always so close to you in terms of like you could text. Oh, yeah. No, that's the thing. When my dad, I'm sure went through breakup, he would go through breakup and then was able

to just forget instead of when I go through breakup stalking their social media. Like it's a drug. You know, like I'm going to be like, how can I make myself feel bad today? Which is literally impossible not to do. Like, it's impossible. Like, it's like, I think if you have really good habits to avoid that. I do. I, like, completely am.

cut off. You've never done it though? I might have done it like when I was like in college. Yeah. And it's like a check in kind of thing. But like I, excuse me. You kind of, I've had so many relationships that like I've been like madly in love and then just get broken up with. I'm like good at getting dumped now. Yeah. Yeah. It's the hardest one the first one? Yeah. Oh yeah. For sure. And it was like I feel like I knew the guy that she was leaving me for. Like I feel like I met him because I remember meeting him. I remember meeting him.

him, she moved to college and I was like still in high school. I went out to visit her and there was this guy that was like hanging with like her group of friends. And I kept thinking, I was like, this guy is like the coolest guy ever. And then like, you're judging her like, have you seen this one? You guys like so strong. I saw it like huge. Yeah.

And then she broke up with me like a month later and I was like, I never thought about it, but I'm sure it was like that guy. And that guy probably just fucked her and then moved on because he was just the cool college like upper class it is so funny the level of like uh like everybody just everyone's chasing the snake's head or whatever that thing is how long do you think it took before you were like done being sad well dude the crazy thing it took me like probably two years to be like totally over her because i was like madly in love with her but the crazy thing is before we broke up she like wasn't having her period for a while and i was just like blowing loads inside of her like just no no condom ever

because this was like my first sexual partner. And she stopped having periods. And then one day, like three months later, she was like, oh yeah, I had a period. Everything is fine. I was like, oh, okay, cool. And then, like, I got blackout drunk, like after we broke up, like, a year later.

And I was, like, cooking eggs at a party at my house. And, like, there was, like, a crowd of, like, 12 people around me. I have no memory of this. But I was just shouting about how she got an abortion. And, like, I was like, yeah, she got an abortion. and she didn't tell me. While you're burning eggs on this dot. And people told me that they're like, yeah,

you were yelling about how she got an abortion. And I was like, this was the next day. I was like, holy shit. I think she did kind of, like my blackout mind knew it. But like, yeah, yeah. And I asked her and she was like, yeah, I just couldn't tell you because like your parents were so pro-life. That's crazy, dude.

Yeah. There's almost a little Padriac. I know, dude. That's like ready. Is that fucking with you at all? Yes, it actually does. Yeah, dude, I totally like, like in my mind, People really underestimate it's like I am for the most part pro choice.

Like I don't know where I draw the line. I was talking to you guys. I have no idea where that line is drawn where I'm like now it's a baby. Because some people are like this half its head in. It's not a baby. You can chop off the head if it's coming in head first. But then they're like... That one's even more fucked up of do you feel fucked up that you weren't involved in that conversation?

Do you think things would have gone different if it was at least brought up to you? Because it was definitely the right call. And I think like asking for my opinion, I would have been like we should have the baby. and then it would have made things more difficult. And like now I'm like, but it is, I don't know. I'm thankful that I don't have a kid now. I tend to go like, you know, it is mostly her agency, you know, her body, like her decision. For sure.

But there's probably some part of me that if I were you would be thinking like there is some form of decision that was taken away from me. Definitely. Definitely. Yeah. It was like, like I said, it was the right thing. But it would have been good to know that, like have being told that instead of like asking. but yeah dude I was like I fully convinced myself like before she had her period that I was like gonna raise a kid and I was like I feel like I'm ready even though I was like 17 in high school I was like I

think I can do this which is a much more kind of courageous response as opposed to like please please please I'll fucking do anything I'll break up with you if you have it I'll break up with you yeah yeah I don't know I, I, I, I, I, I, but you want, you want, you want, you want, like, out of choice, like, you know, like, you want the timing to be right. Yeah, yeah. Typically, but then a lot of people who do have it forced upon them, I don't think I were usually would admit to regretting it. You know, they're like, well, I was as ready as I was going to be. And thank God we, you know, it'd be crazy if more parents are open about like, dude, I got fuck when I was 16. I hate this kid.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know people that obviously know, they're like, that's got to be so weird. because I'd be able to know they're an accident. I don't know if it fucks with them or not. Yeah, dude, my best friend from back home,

his mom tried to have him aborted, and it failed. Wow. And, like, she's her own, their only child. And, like, she's like, thank fucking God. Like, that didn't work because, like, they, she's, like, it's so loving, you know?

Yeah, every kid who, like, was almost aborted is now, like, an argument for abortion. It's like, yeah, well, because what other side are you going to take? Like, like, there's, there's no, world where you are a pro choice. I just know because you were the end of that thing. But it's like I really philosophically, I don't know where it starts.

I was talking to you about this. A clump of sacks is less of a life than a deer. I don't know why it's all right for me to eat a full grown deer who has a family who knows them. But not eat a few. What do you mean a clump of sacks? It's right, clump of cells. Sack a cell. We always just use the same analogy.

But it's like at some point I do, and as I said, I'm not a scientist, but at some point it is like all these cells and like weird it's not quite a baby. And I think that live deer is more of a live thing because that is a family that knows it. It's lived a life and has family knows it. So I don't know why I could justify me eating that deer, but not, I mean, let's go this far. Me eating that, that fetus. I don't know where, I don't know where the line gets drawn.

Yeah, I don't know if that's something we can figure. Maybe embryo is the correct term. I don't know if that's something we can figure out like scientifically or even like thinking about it hard enough. I don't think we're going to figure it out by thinking about it and like, philosophizing it. I think the most helpful thing is to be like, how would I feel if my girlfriend got pregnant? And I really didn't want it early or even like some random girl I hooked up with the head face tattoos. Yes, that is the real scenario. The fattest woman you could imagine. You accidentally get her pregnant. Yeah. Yeah. I think all arguments about like when a life is a life

go out the window and you're like, yeah, I would rather my life go this way. Dude, but also like the female body like responds to an abortion, like it's really hard on them. like emotionally. Like, because you're, everything like kicks up, like after it happens. And like,

from what I understand, like almost every woman that has an abortion is like, oh my God, what did I do? Like, because that's like the chemical response that happens.

It's like, your body's trying to tell you, like, don't do that. You know, like, this is the, this is the reason for life.

Yeah, but like, I don't know. I think I, I'm pro choice because like, I don't know. I don't know.

I don't really care. But the one I don't like is the post. postpartum, or whatever the late term abortion where like the head peaks out and they just fucking slice the head. Have you ever heard of that? I was making that up as a joke. No, that was like a real.

I think it's like illegal in some states, but that was like a big thing that like a lot of my family protested against because they're like, because it doesn't count as an abortion. So it was done in places that abortion wasn't legal. So like the baby is technically born, but it's like just the head and they literally just like saw the head and half. That's crazy. deliver the baby. I feel like other things would make more sense.

Like if you stood like with like a maybe like some sort of dart gun. Yeah. Just hit the head that way. You don't have to. Or glocked. Yeah. Well, the fucked up thing is that a version of an abortion is the healthiest version of an abortion for a woman. Because they carried the pregnancy throughout the whole thing.

And then like it would be like if they deliver the baby and then the doctor drop the baby. But like for their vagina. I know it's like the big, for my concern, I'm like we're destroying vaginas. Yeah. No, I think their vagina. mentality. In my mind, I'm like, well, if you get rid of it earlier, then you're getting a smaller thing coming out of the vagina.

Also, I guess, like, men who watch the thing, like the birth, like are never able to look at a vagina the same way again. Yeah. Well, I don't know. The vacuum cleaner thing seems like the, I don't know if that's actually a thing that happens, but yeah, like the sucking and out. I don't know. It's got to be very traumatizing.

I really just picture like a Swelow from Family Guy. But I want to keep the baby. Yeah. Oh, no. Yeah. You don't have baby. I take, I take baby. You are a whore.

You're a whore. You're burning hair. It's just spraying lemon blood. Mr. Superman is just not here. You hear that? Seth McFarland? I think he got to do writers. I'm a lucky dog.

I can't get to grow pregnant. Nothing comes up. Does any part of you, okay, so you had cancer that you don't have a testicle, or you have one testicle. Yeah. But I also don't have a testicle.

Yeah, yeah. You should get your second testicle replaced with like a whoopee cushion, one of those selfies. So you can see if you're involved in the fart. I always made the joke of something you feel like it glows or plays music or something like that. To be sick, like a fucking like a Bluetooth speaker in there. It's just gliding up. I got the feeling. Check this out.

Guys, I got guns in my head. Just turn a blue and green. Bitch I say what I said. I said. I had a friend who had cancer and his testicular cancer. He also got a testicle removed. And I told him, like, because he got like a false one, like a fake one. I told him he should get like a cube one.

That would be lit. No, I thought about all that stuff. But then I was just like, I leave it. I think I would have had to figure out how to do the prosthetic. And I was like, I kind of want one. Would it be called a pubic cube? Wow. This is what you guys are talking?

I'm just like formulating. I'm like, pub, cube. There's something fucking there. It is kind of, you do have more space down there. That is a nice thing. Yeah, now I kind of forget what it felt like to have to. Or to calm. I don't remember what it feels like to come anymore.

But it feels good, right? Because you just get that spasm. Yeah, it still feels like an orgasm, just nothing comes out. It still gets hard and it's still, it's still only last like. In fairness, if the air came out, like a, it goes. Yeah. And it is good that, like, that is the grossest part about, like, jerking off. There is some amount of.

You can literally. off clarity that has been alleviated by not having it. I feel like part of this shame in jerking off is the cleanup. I never had post not clarity before I jizzed. This is a great. I never felt shame. I might, I would just spas.

It's gross and it's like, oh, I got a, you know. Yeah, you basically, you're having female orgasm. Yeah, yeah, a little dry nut. And then I still got my shit freezing, so hopefully whenever I had decided. Oh, so you can still have a kid. Yeah, yeah. That's awesome. I might just, I wouldn't want to adopt.

I might just freeze. come on the podcast next time I want to see it. I would need to unfreeze it. I'm paying a lot of money for that. Yeah, I think that it might ruin the guy. I thought about that though, because I don't ever get the experience of jerking off a new girl's face.

Like, I'd never get to come on a lady. You just have a cup ready. I just have a turkey baster and just waste all of my... All my chances of having a kid. Just get to come on her face. Dude, well, how many kids do you get out of one... I think it depends how much... Because I had a limited amount of time before I could freeze it.

because there was only so many jizzes I could do within the two weeks. That's a high pressure whack. Yeah. It was a little, well, it was a high, you're in a separate room and, uh, you know, they give you, they do give you like Amazon Prime.

I used my phone. I remember the video I jerked off to. I conceived my potential child too. It's so funny. If I had Amazon Prime, I would jerk off to the scene from the boys where he's like sucking that lady's tits while she's jerking.

Oh, yeah. Or the dude's in the guy's cock. Yeah. Yeah. No, it has actually fucked up is the, I looked on the Amazon Prime and it said their most recent video was, I spit on your grave, which is like a rape revenge movie. Oh, of like a really intense rape scene and then like really violent second half.

And I'm just like, what motherfucker? Yeah. Maybe don't use this guy. You got some free rapes. So there's no DNA. It's a great idea. I'm not trying to put any bad ideas in your head.

Yeah, like that you would get blamed. you're not going to be like Pat, did you hear you got this idea from somebody? But the thing I'm wondering is like, okay, so you have your cum and it's, I'm just thinking of the flanks to pull on him. Like we unplug the refrigerator at the place.

Oh, yeah. Maybe we switch his cum with somebody else's. His baby comes out Chinese. That would be cool. I'm like, wait a minute. It would be, I wish. I showed you that, oh, you're sorry. I was going to say,

I wish that like it was kind of, of random, like what kind of baby you have? Like, if a black guy comes in a black or a black guy comes in a white girl, like the baby's Chinese, like something like that. Dude, this might solve an interesting level of racism. Yeah. Oh, dude, if you could, if you could somehow genetically modify human beings to, uh, where would they come and any race can happen?

Then you're, because you're like, I can't be racist. I think that you need to be randomized. I think that could easily lead to just like, oh yeah. Look, this is taking every human being against their world and manipulating their DNA. Yeah. maybe throw a vaccine. Did they do it already? I don't know.

I haven't had any pregnancies. But it is interesting because you would go like, oh, my kid could be any race, so I'm not going to be racist. And then people would also be like, oh, whoever can have sex with whoever because like, there's no keeping the bloodline clean

or any weird thing like that. Or it's like what position you come in is like the race of child. Yeah, yeah. Missionary, it's white. Yeah. Missionary, it's white. Doggy style, black.

But if there was, you're doing like some weird comma soup church. or whatever. Indian. The, what was it? Fucking, I was something bad.

I showed you that video. My favorite was that video that little Asian kid and he's like, this kid's wearing like a collared shirt and he's like four years old. He's like, there's a weird conspiracy theory

that Asians are smarter than other races. This is absolutely not true. And I'm like, I'm looking at a three-year-old Asian telling me this. I think they are smarter than all of us. According to my calculation, that is incorrect.

He's like, we just work harder. And he's like, now you're just, that doesn't, by the way, that doesn't make anybody feel less. Yeah, it's like, now you're just being racist. Yeah, yeah. As a white person, I'm more sad if you're calling me lazy instead of just dumber than Asians. Yeah, yeah, instead of ignorant. Yeah, yeah. But let's, let's wrap it up there.

What do you guys want to promote? Check out, um, rough week, I guess. I don't know, yeah, it's rough week. Christop and Luke's podcast on producing them. That's probably the only thing I'm working on. Well, then what's your Instagram handle? Joe underscore underscore Jacks, baby. Is there anything you want to promote besides him raping women's there's no DNA,

which you clearly promoted on this podcast, and we will hold against you one day in court? Yes. Patty is funky on Instagram. I don't even know. Don't even care, worry about the Instagram. Just news from bed, the podcast. But anyone who...

I keep playing hard to get you. Don't even worry about. I want you guys to unfollow me if you do. I'm done with Instagram. Really? I'm done. It's for, like, chicks. Okay.

It's a chick thing. That's how you get shit. Think about this. We're all. concerned by the algorithm. It was made literally by Chinese nerds. What do they fucking know? A lot, as we discussed.

A three-year-old, sir. Chinese three-year-olds deciding that right who's going to be famous. Follow me on Instagram. Patty is funky. Thank you for listening. Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Appreciate you. Oh, ho.