Morning Good - The Cliffhanger - Episode 298

Episode Date: January 11, 2026

Alex Ives and Levi White join the show for today's episode. They talk about riding in a Cybertruck in Florida on ketamine, Marcus Garvey and Nick Fuentes, and bringing a knife on an airplane.Thanks to Alex and Levi for coming back on the show. Check them both out on previous episodes and hit their links down below for more.Alex is on Instagram @alexives__standing. Levi is on Instagram as well @levithewhite.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michaelgoodcomedy and on Twitter @agoodmichael. Check out the show on YouTube and follow the official Instagram page @morninggoodpodcast.

Thanks for the F Shack. I love dirty Mike and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They call it the podcast? Morning good, good. Hey, welcome to the air.

Thanks. Welcome to Morning Good. On for the Morning Good episode. I don't fucking know. Who gives a fuck, dude? Just a couple guys, not giving a shit. We're here Levi White and Alex Ives. What's up?

And, uh, no, we're talking about. parties that like we uh dude i i like referencing last episode because people you leave him sometimes on a cliffhanger so new year's i was in town and people don't really know when i'm in town i'm from orlando so like sometimes people are like oh he's still in town he's not in town i heard my buddy is throwing a party and uh i didn't get an invite so i was like what the fuck i was like what i'm gonna do is i'm hit him up the night before and be like hey man do you want to grab drinks before i leave town and he texts me saying i'm setting up for a new year's party tomorrow i'll let you know when I'm done at my place.

So I was like, I'm going crazy. I'm showing people at the bar. I'm like, what is it? It's not like, oh, that means fuck you. Yeah. What he thought, is you're leaving. Yes, he thought that meant that was my last night in town. I call him up, I go, hey man, I'm done.

I'm done spinning in my head like, do you hate me or do you not hate me? He's like, what the fuck are you talking about it? I was like, does your wife say his wife's here too? She's like, no, I fucking love you. Like, what's the fucking, you hate me, bitch. Yeah, everybody fucking hate me. Shut the fuck up. Say what you want. You fucking hate me.

Yeah, but I had a great time, dude. We went to their place. I fucking, nice little barbecue cookout. Nice. Did a bunch of special K that went to some random guy's house who had illegal iguanas. Oh, wow. Which was sick. This guy's like, different house, by the way, not my friends.

This guy goes, you want to see some illegal iguanas? And I was like, fuck yeah, dude. And he's like, you can't take any pictures. And I was kind of like, dude, just fucking let me see the iguanas. And then he's like, you can't. I was like, dude, we just did ketamine together. Like, why can I look at these fucking iguanas? What makes them illegal?

Yeah, do they look illegal? Uh, one of them, tattoos. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It says Trace de Argoa.

Just an MS. 13. Just right across the fucking head. Um, but, uh, no, it's, it's,

it's what happens in Florida is they fall, they freeze up when it gets cold, and they fall down and you think they're dead. But then you put them under a heat lamp and they come back to life. So there's these people thinking, oh, this is a worthless iguana.

I should probably just throw it in the trash. Nah, you can fucking scoop those up, sell them. How much they sell them? How much they sell? guy. To a person.

Somebody who wants weird pets. I have no idea, but you could probably fucking, I don't know, too, because I'm like, you know, my animal rights view is always changed because sometimes I'm like, I don't even know what it does. So I'm like, when I see one in a terrarium, I'm like, I don't know, what is he going to, like, not move at all or walk across the street and get by car? You're supposed to kill him in Florida. Oh, because they're invasive.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're supposed to. What are they doing, though? Like, what are they doing that's bad besides just living? I don't know. Yeah, they just eat bugs, dude. They got those dope-ass tongues rolls back up like a roll-up, dude. I don't know what they're doing.

They're probably eating some algae that's important. Yeah. And then, you know. And this guy's putting that on his bloodhole to get tongue-funked by the iguana. Yeah, no, that's probably, yeah, because there's lots of, what are the snakes that are invasive, right? There's like, there's the python. Yeah, ball pythons, right? I thought was Burmys.

Is that a bipolar then? Maybe. Because I always thought it was Burmys, I looked up, but this is ball but made ballsworth. But, yeah, those you're also supposed to, I don't know if you're supposed to kill those. You're supposed to at least capture them and, like, send them somewhere. Yeah.

I'm not doing any of that shit. Yeah. It's like your USBS with, like, your duct tapeing a package. You're like, how do I get rid of this fucking Python? Donate it to Alligator Alcatraz. They could use it. They could use them. How true is Alligator Alcatraz?

I think it exists. Okay. Yeah. I don't know if they actually have people. right now, but it's definitely like, they cleared out in the airfield. They got, yeah, they got alligators there. No way C. They have nothing there. I don't know if that's where they're sending people, though. I think they're just shipping them. Yeah, I think they're sending them to other countries. Do you think they're doing the Marcus Garve? You think that was so funny with,

I think it was Marcus Garvey who had the back to Africa movement and they said it. Oh, yeah. It's like Jamaica or something. It was just so funny. Yeah, I mean, you guys you could find your way back to Africa. Yeah. Yeah. So, you're going to like it here. A problem. Probably. There's water. Am I wrong, or did he have like a Captain Crunch style hat? Can you look up Marcus Garvey right now? I think he had like a, whenever I saw pictures of me, he had like a either cap. Like an old school pirate hat? It was either that or maybe it's just a hat from coming to America the dad has that looks kind of different. It's more likely not the Captain Crunchette. That would be so sad. That's just, yeah. That's one pick. Yeah. Oh my God.

Yeah. He's literally Captain Grunge. Yeah. Was he a general? Or he's just dressed. fucking flies fuck, dude. I'm getting Marcus Garvey confused with like the civil rights activist from like Massachusetts. Who am I thinking of the writer? I can't even remember. Who is Marcus Garvey? He was just like some civil rights gab, but he was just like, yeah, we need to get the fuck out of here. It's like, this shit. Cause of death. We need to go back to Africa.

Fuck this shit. You're just fat as fuck at a stroke. What was the scary movie? Lides? Like, white folk shot. We need to get the fuck out of here. yeah, I'm sure he... Yeah, I don't know what he... I have no idea what he did. He was like, we had to go back to Africa and then you're going to Jamaica.

Yeah, it's... Yeah, I don't know. I don't know much about him, but... Yeah. This isn't a Marcus Garvey bunch. No, no, no, no. I think on Marcus. Sorry. If I would have looked at five minutes

and it said like four things that were inacted. Yeah. I love doing that on podcasts and just being wrong. I can give you guys a full rundown on Fuentes, but not Marcus Garvey. Harvey. Let's hear. This is what I'm hearing.

Yeah. I know. I was telling you, I'm going through a breakup, but I feel like I'm just like becoming like a white nationalist. My whole feeds Fuentes and how to get your ex back. But Fuentes is a gay guy. He's a closeted homosexual.

Right. Who's like, you know, painfully funny. Like, I don't want to like him. And I spent like maybe two months trying not to like him. But I'm like,

fuck it. This guy's just too funny. He is really funny. He's just too funny. Yeah. What was the thing? he said some really funny to Pierce Morgan where he's like, my kids

they're respectful women of this and then he goes, well, it sounds like he got two little girls. He's like, my boys, this isn't that, he's like, sounds like girls. He had the holocaust thing on there too where he was like too soon. Yeah, I was, well, because then he brought that British guy and he's like which is so funny. I thought about it was before, like

the Pierce Morgan stuff's so funny where he just has somebody on, he totally disagrees with and knows how they think. He goes like, wait, Kanye West, you're telling me, on my thing. You don't want Jewish people He's like, yeah, he has a fucking swastika He's been doing That's all he's his thing

What are you fucking And then he had like a Holocaust survivor I was his British guy Talking to him And then he went is it the funniest thing He's like Then he brings this fucking British guy out He's like

He probably calls it something weird Like the holly or something He probably has a nickname for it Ohly That's funny He was like me mom Me mom and me dad die Yeah

It sucks because he's so funny Dude, I'm a Jew, and I'm like, it's pretty good stuff, dude. He's got, yeah, it's pretty good. Will you just win when you fucking are serious and then the other person's not serious? Yeah, totally. Because, like, obviously there's serious topics and, like, it's a problem that this guy's, like, a white nationalist and he's got, like, a begillion followers. But I'm also, like, I'm having free speech absolutist. I'm like, let, you know, people say the thing.

But it is also a thing we were like, dude, if you're going to have this guy on whose thing is fucking with people and then you're going to, like, lose it. Like, you're going to lose it unless you fucking have, like, a good roast. He does like, he has like two person, he's when he went on Tucker Carlson, he was like sitting up right. And he was like, he was toned it down so much. Then he got shit for that. So he's like, all right, I'm going to tune it up, but not for peers. Just like destroyed peers. Yeah, I know too much about this fucking guy, dude.

Yeah. And I have to figure out who I can send Fuente's reels to. I have like three guys where I'm like, I know I can send it to them. But there are a lot of guys who are like, I can't send this shit. I almost don't have like a group at this point. It's like most people I could just send any other. Yeah. And I'm like,

all this nonsense. Yeah. Fucking alien videos. Yeah. Dude. I just go in. And it's a, yeah, those are, what else is there about him?

I don't know how much? Um, he used, he was like a centrist in college and he's Mexican as well. He's a Mexican Italian. He's from Chicago. And he just does that show. And it's just,

he hates everybody. He's just like, his whole thing is purity, which is why he can't come out as gay. Right. There was a stream he was doing, and this is how everyone knows he's gay. The stream ended, and he left his screen sharing on, and it was just immediately two guys fucking each other.

Just watching gay porn right when the stream ends. Dude, that's where he's going to win. I've said this for months. He's gone so far right that, like, the only way, but he's a attention seeker. Like, this clearly is, like, move. So he's going to have to go. I said he's going to go liberal, but, dude, if he comes out, is gay and it's like I've been a claused

a gay guy he would fucking yeah just like Andy Cohen I'd just be like yeah I'm gay I'm fun yeah yeah the born again thing that's different than that yeah who's the other guy that um who's the one Republican guy who's like a closet it was claus did a little bit now he's just out and being gay he's pretty fucking fun is he like an

influence or an actual politician he was a politician and then he just like lied a bunch he was like a crazy liar was he the Long Island guy George Santos yeah yeah he's fun he is fun podcast is just having a good time. It's funny this is where everybody goes back.

Like Bon Joopped out. Now he's like potlif. Just talking shit on a microphone saying retarded stuff. Fuentes did come around on Jews though. He is like, I've seen clips of him. And like, you know how he has like the super jet? People ask him questions. He'll be like, hey, like father of three.

Like what books can I show my kids, like my 10 and 12 year old about like the Jewish question? He's like, he was like, I don't know, like, Dr. Seuss. He's like, yeah, you want to tell your 10 and 12? He's like, how about teach them how to read? Yeah, yeah. I also love, I love him he said coming around on him. He is.

He's like, you know, I don't know, as if it's like margarita pizza or something. You know what? I've been wrong about a few things. I tried at once. He's like, Barry Weiss, I get it. He's like, I get why you're so upset. These people are retarded. Yeah.

He goes for high level anti-Semitism. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he also like, I love the Jewish. question thing because it's not a it's not a question it's like i don't even know what this is yeah it's just like kind of like what the what the nazis is like how do we solve the jewish question yeah yeah but like people say it like they're like obviously like you know there's reasons there's lots of jewish people in hollywood it's like they're pushed out of a lot of things um be silent

a goye's talking about i'm like the non-jew talking about i'm like you listen let me cover this no it's a good amount though yeah but it's like that things like that happened but people are like oh why are you're jews but like most time anybody you'd be like what's the jewish question They're like really asking. They're like, so why, what are we going to do? It's like, it's not a question. Yeah. More like, how do we solve you?

Yeah, it's more of the problem. The Jewish question is, is there a draft in here? That's a Jewish question. Yeah. I've never heard about any of this shit. I got to stop talking about Fuentes. Yeah, man. He's funny, man.

He's funny. He's interesting. But yeah, this is totally unrelated. But have you guys ridden the cyber truck, dude? I have, dude. They're sick. I was so sick. Aren't they dope?

Yeah, I was blown away by it, dude. Yeah. The fucking windows. First off, my dad had a self-driving Tesla, so I just rode that around, just who gives a shit, flown around town. And then I would never drive it drunk, but I wrote in a couple self-driving Tesla's with an intoxicated driver. Because in my mind, I'm like, you know what?

This is technically safer than a regular person driving. Yeah. Because it is, it's like very self-wheres. I was like, whatever. And I was on just like, so first off, the window is from like way back here, all the window range is crazy. And this guy's just playing hard tech now and I'm on a bunch of ketamine

and I'm like, this is how Elon rides to Tesla. It's just like fucking K-hold out. It's the fucking future. It's so fun, dude. The amount of thumbs downs I saw just driving by people in other cars just like, boo. It was like this thing rocks, dude. And like,

how it makes no sound too still, I think that blows me away when my friend just floored it and I was like, holy shit. I feel like I'm on a roller coaster. Yeah. It's so fun. Yeah, I have like an Irish friend and she was here and she was like, well, fuck is, I mean, I can't do Irish. She's not Pierce Morgan, but she was just mind-blown. Hadn't seen a Hasidic Jewish person or a Tesla.

It's like, what is going on? There's a lot of crazy stuff going on here. I like the way they look. A lot of people shit on it just. Yeah. I think it looks like Blater Runner. Yeah, it looks like Halo. Yeah, we're a fucking Batmano.

It's fucking sick as hell. Yeah. Yeah, Elon's a fucking bitch. I hate them. but yeah, I don't know. They look cool. Yeah. They look cool.

They feel cool. They taste good. They're great. The other fucking wild thing I did on New Year's, I was so drunk and I didn't get laid. And so I just started DMing. We're watching the Weather Channel on my buddy's house. It's 5am. And we're like, yeah, they're probably awake right now because they're doing the live weather.

I was like, dude, I'm just like, this is just a hilarious. This is just a DMing weather woman just like, yeah, what's good with you? no answers but I'm like you do that'd be so funny dude if it's 6 a.m. A. A weather lady just came over and sucked off everybody it'd have been oh my god dude dream but now I've changed

dramatically because I'm waiting for a herpes test to come back right now oh god yeah I'm losing my fucking mind what kind I mean you gotta test for but I have one so I'm not really testing for that okay yeah but the sequel's always worse It's a stressful life, dude.

Yeah. I'm like, I just had a bump on my dick, and I don't know, it could be fucking literally anything. Yeah. Sometimes you just get bumps in your dick. And, uh, they just show up. They just show up.

Sometimes they itch and there's 90 of them. And it's kind of a cluster. They're red and losing. And it looks exactly like herpes. And I've never worn a condom once, but like, no. That's just one. That's the reason I don't think it's herpes, but just crazy.

Laser burn, dude. Well, it's on the tip of my dick. Oh, it's on the tip. Shaving that, yeah. When I got herpes one, it was just all over my pewb area. I didn't actually, I think I had like one or two on, like side profile on my dick, but that was it. But you had one. So, like, did she lick your pub?

No, she blew me. And that's how I, so she must have had like a cold sore. But she was been like, oh, yeah. Because I get it was straight up to your pew. You got to be like that for me. Look, guys, he got me. She gave a good, yeah. That's headmaster.

Ex-girlfriend. Yeah, shout out. Shout out. I miss you I do miss you I think you know I think you know that Nick Quintas

weird to talk about women shouldn't be allowed to listen to podcasts just because the amount of trouble you get as a guy for just saying stuff I mean yeah she begins the law

I guess the law women shouldn't be allowed to listen to podcast no because what are you listening to nothing nothing nothing I'm listening to

call her daddy okay that's fine I haven't said anything retarded on there yeah definitely don't listen to any like i would hate if sierra listened to any podcast i do oh dude it's just it's just a nightmare yeah i like we're talking about this kevin brennan like cheat on his wife and talked about it on a podcast and she like he just didn't know i think there's a radio he was just like yeah so anyways it's like almost lady basically just sucked my dick the

other week just walked out the door like nothing happened like she came home and she's like what the fuck like he's an idiot you have no clue you i was when i first started dating my girlfriend I went on a podcast, and I just started shitting on her parents. Like 20 minutes in, I was like, I really hope she doesn't get 20 minutes. Well, that's more dangerous because I would expect, like, Sierra's family to actually listen to the podcast I'm on. Yeah. And, you know, I expect, like, my mom to listen to every podcast I'm on. Yeah, so.

But not her. She's not going to listen to it. She has no interest in me. Yeah. That's fine. My parents were bummed out the first time I went on Patty's podcast. Like, what were you talking? What are you saying?

It's so funny. Yeah, that's why you're just like, nobody got the Beatles at first. You guys are just aging out. You don't fucking get it, dude. Yeah. No, I had a full argument with my dad with comedy when I was back home because he's like, you know, you're 29. You know, do you still have as much confidence in this and for war? And I was just like, we're never having this conversation again.

I'm not asking you for money. I was like, I'm going to make more money than you ever did. Like, I was like, I went fucking crazy. Straight off a scene, Marty Supreme. You're like, give him my goals. What? Yeah, yeah. That was a good movie.

Still have to see it. Still have to see it. Yeah. Waiting for digital release. His movies are stressful. Is Supreme stressful? It's not as stressful as like a, as uncut gems. It's not just drums just like,

no. There are little moments to breathe and it's a little, I don't know, goofier, I guess. Yeah. These are goofy actors and it's like Tyler the creator and that fat guy from, Yeah, from the Knicks game. He was good. Everybody's in love with that Odessa chick now. Who's that?

She's in the movie. Can we look wrong? Yeah, I just know Gwenith Poutre looked hot. Oh, yeah, Gwyneth Poutre was fantastic in the movie and very sexy. But this Odessa girl, she's a fantastic actress, but I think she looks like a little boy to me. I don't know. That's girl. Okay, well, now I have to say she's ugly.

Yeah, because she looks like a little boy, I think. Yeah, the picture is. Let me cross my legs right now. Yeah, definitely not hot. Yeah, she's pretty hot. Let me see. Another one? That's Pamela Adlon's daughter. She has a lot of different looks based off what I just saw.

Okay. She had that septum piercing now. Not a septum piercing guy? Not a septim piercing guy, not a tattoo guy. Really? Oh, she did a Jaden Smith? That makes sense. I'm a purist, dude.

She looks hot here in her most old woman. Not a single tattoo? Dude, yes. I don't like tattoos on girls. It's very Jewish of you. It is, but it's almost white nationalists of me. There's certain tattoos I'm okay with this. Yeah, maybe like an ankle tat.

Just somewhere where I literally can never fucking see it. I like them. I hate them in porn, though, because they take it totally, all the roleplays or something kind of weird, it's like a mom. I'm like, a nice mom wouldn't be tatted up. So I'm like, that mom, you know what? I would. Yeah, but I'm saying, like, sometimes you see.

see a thing where you're like, you're playing a certain character. Like, you're playing like, you know what I mean? So it's like, they look too porny when they do that. Where I'm like, no, you're supposed to be the strict disciplinary woman who's like, you know, something like that. No tattoos and the biggest fake tits you've ever seen. Yeah, exactly. I just don't know what a girl needs a tattoo for, though.

Like, if you're like a green beret, like, you can get a tattoo. If you do cool shit, you can get a tattoo. What is a girl doing? Like what? Maybe her dad died and a mother's like, like, like, actually. You just get a Harley on her bag on her back. Yeah. Get the sons of anarchy tattoo

Just on her back I think they're hot I like them It doesn't bother me Sam Crow across the chest Well the only ones that bother me Are calf tattoos Those are tough

Yeah That's a guy thing That's a guy thing Yeah That's like a JV cross coach tattoo You look like a lesbian If you got a calf tattoo

Yeah Like a family crest Or something like that Anything dolphin Those are kind of That's crazy to be like Because I love my family But I'm like

I'm gonna get my family I don't know who my great-grandpa was or what he was about. You're like, my family, you're like, no, my family has always been awesome. You're like, it's insane. I bet they were, dude. Yeah, but they were sick. There was zero pedophiles or it's like, nah, somebody is. I can't imagine, dude.

It's like nobody with a powerful family is getting their family crest tattooed on them. Yeah. It's some loser in Bay Ridge, some Irish loser. Yeah. It's like, I need to get O'Hallahan tattooed on me. It's like, nobody cares about you. Yeah, you guys are all related. It's incest.

Your family crest would be like nine different things on top of each other. The real wealth is when people have the rings. What is it? Oh, the one they used to stamp the thing. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That doesn't know about that. Yeah.

My ex had one. She's like kind of related to the Rockefeller. So I blew that one. Huge. You really fucked up now. Huge mistake, dude. Yeah. It's time to get back.

I'm still available to us. I desperately want to get back. It's like the movie where the guys in live television he's about to like, you know, do something big like a... Isn't there one where like a football coach says that? He's like talking to his wife. He's like, I miss you Cheryl or something like that on live TV. No?

I don't know. Okay. It sounds kind of familiar. Yeah. We watched the game plan the other night. That's what I was thinking of. The Rock. The Rock.

He's like... I've seen it. Yeah. It's a fucking retarded. They filmed it at Gillette though, which was cool for me as a kid. Is it like a kid's movie? Yeah, it was a Disney movie. Oh.

Is he like a... Well, there's the Tooth Fairy one. one. Yeah, this is different. This is different. It's like an estranged daughter, isn't it? Yeah, so basically he's this like football star. And they like try to make his life look sad because like he has like a party.

And there's like women there, but then he's just like alone in his apartment because it's a Disney movie. And so of course he's not going to be just like banging tons of horrors. They miss that part where it's like that he's snuggling with like five women. So it's just him alone. And then he's like, you know. And then the little girl shows up at his door. And then it turns out of his daughter with no other person. She's just there like alone with a person.

with the paperwork. And then obviously, you know, he's like two into football, but then he finds out that, you know, the only thing he really cares about his family. True. And that's what it comes down to. That's what it comes down to. Did I watch the any given Sunday speech

for the first time, like, with real intent? Wait, is that the one where he's like, I fucked up everything in my life? Yes, dude. That's how I thought when I thought I got herpes. I was like, pushed everyone away ever loved. Six inches in front of your face. It's crazy because I was thinking,

imagine like being like a PA on the set as Pacino just five minute monologues like the greatest speech ever like holy shit dude dude um incredible dude but yeah that gave me life that gave me life after the break you back Pacino dude yeah anything Pacino just makes me feel good yeah jack and jill jack and jill big Pacino head big that i literally just saw on my Instagram and like hyped me up when i'm been worried about my herpes i've been like yeah sure dude. That speech translates to everything in life. Yeah. It's being a man. It's like pissed all my money away. I'm like

looking at my bag of cat. I'm like, I did fucking do that. I made every mistake a middle-aged man can make. Well, this is the thing, this is not to talk about it too much, but this is my thing. Before I got herpes, or thought I did, because I really don't know, I was like, I would never

fuck somebody with herpes. And then when I thought I had it, I was like, we need to chill out about this. I was like, everybody needs to loosen up. It's not even a big deal. I'm on The guy, I was like, yeah, not with fucking a 10-foot pole. Would I look at somebody with herpes? Now I'm like, everybody, it's nice, chill. That's what happened to me when I was, now I'm explaining people the different types of herpes.

I'm like, well, it's one, 70% of people have it. It's not that big of a deal. And I'm like, birds I feel, I'm like, holy shit, Alex. Yeah. I've told 20 people and then now I have to go back and tell them when I assume I don't have it. Yeah. Hopefully you don't have any of them. Yeah.

Well, I have a joke. I'm just kidding. And they're like, you're like, yeah, right. Yeah, sure, buddy. I have a joke about having herpes And like I used to tell it from the security of being in a relationship Having herpes But now I tell the joke as a single guy

With a microphone just being like guys Can you believe that I have herpes? Then you're standing in the back of the room after the show You want to fuck? Exactly I can't explain it on stage But also I just deal with that struggle too Because I went from like not at all trying to fuck people in the audience

To want to far people in the audience And you got to shut that part of your brain off Because it'll make you less fun Yeah. Just start being like, can I get some pussy tonight? Like, I gotta just be like,

what fucking ever, yeah. If you have a good enough set, someone will take HSV1 off you. Yeah, it's like, if you can just really break it down for them,

it's like, it's really not that, like your mom probably has it. Dude, I told multiple when I have Hsv1 still in sex. Like, nobody,

I don't even tell people anymore because it's like everybody fucking has it. Yeah, but, uh, yeah, no,

that's a little change. Because yeah, I've told just so many fucking people. And, uh, have you told your parents? Yeah, of course. I never told my parents I have it.

I paid cash at CitiMD. I was like, no paper drill on this. Yeah, I was just losing my fucking mind. I was just like, this is something on my dick and I'm freaking out. Yeah.

I've talked to multiple people with herpes trying to like get in their headset. Looking up the dating pool of celebrities with herpes, you know, it's like we're on. Yeah. So many.

Kim Kardashian, so I'm left with now. Those are my options. But it was really motivating because I was like, if I have herpes too, then I have to be so rich and famous to get pussy that I was like, I must

be, I'm like, this would actually be really creatively, but also, and then I read later, like, these are like alleged celebrities thereby. It's like, they all have. They all have it. Give me, oh, I'm sure, yeah, I'm sure they fucking do. Oh, sure. I'm sure. I'm sorry. So if you do have it, you'll take Valtrex.

Like, did they get... Yeah, I just start it, because they're like, either way, it's like taking Tickax or just start taking Valtrex. And it does it like, how does it work? Like, does it just get rid of the bumps, or does it make you less reactive. It makes you less reactive. Then if you take Valtrax

while having sex to somebody and wearing a condom, it says there's like a like two, one to two percent chance I get it. Okay. What if you don't wear a condom on Valtrex?

I think it's, I don't know about non-Valtrex. It says if you, all I know is, it says if you had sex to somebody with a herpes outbreak without a condom, there's a

six to 10% chance you get it as a guy. As a woman, I think it's different because it's like, it's just so annoying. I wish it was like a period, you know?

to where you know you're about to have an outbreak. Yeah. And you can just be like, not tonight. You know? Yeah. I'm on my herpes period. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would be so much better.

You know, I don't have herpes because I'm a clean person. Yeah. But I don't know. Maybe I do. So it's good. Yeah, he doesn't have any percent. In a relationship, I never got a CD test. I was like, why the fuck what I find out now?

Yeah. I mean, if I get tested and I do, I'm going to be like that fucking whore. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Immediately. How dares me? And meanwhile, it's like I jerked off with a dirty hand or something. Yeah, yeah.

It's like I didn't wash my hands after flushing a toilet at the pair. And now I have herpes. Well, and that's why I'm like, because I've had a lot of fun. I like mostly work out. I maybe haven't worn it kind of four times since I've been single. And I'm like, but I'm like just having these conversations with God, I'm like, fair game, brother. Yeah. Like, well, hey, if you have it, you don't got to worry about getting it anymore.

True. I definitely thought about that. And then everybody's like, don't tell anybody. I'm like, dude, I want an out. out there so that the herpes women can find me that's true you throw that small dating pool yeah actually it's probably a bigger dating pool than you think yeah yeah probably it's actually probably huge dating and they're both like you know she should make an ass pool yeah it's a pus-filled itchy pool it's pretty disgusting it should be a herpes dating app or like an std dating app that wouldn't

be the worst idea yeah mark that down bumps yeah yeah well the one thing I thought just because it was circular I was like maybe I have syphilis and then I was like I will say this out of all them syphilis is a cool it's dirty it's but it's like what am I fucking Al Capone? That's fucking so badass dude it's like it's like you fucking that fuck a woman in a corset with a garden

and syphilis goes away right? Yeah you take a penicillin shot yeah that's the thing that like syphilis gonorrhea clemenia that she goes away but I'm pretty sure it's like Tyler syphilis or one of the other ones that if you don't get it treated it goes to your brain and he turned it to a fucking nut job.

Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Anyways. It's addicted of fentanyl now. It's like a cowboy. It's like a cowboy. Yeah, yeah.

That is a pretty cool one. The other day, I did walk around like I was a herpes guy. Like, I was like smoking cigs and listening to Bad at the Bone. I'm like, let's lean in, brother. This is who I am. Getting a motorcycle. Dirty guy lifestyle. I tried to do that.

When I got dumped, I was like, I'm so sad. I'm going to get some cigarettes. I bought a pack of cigarettes and took one puff I was like, ugh I was like, I literally threw it away at me, I was like, what the fuck did I? Why don't I buy a vape? Good for you.

Yeah. That's not bad. Yeah, I was chain smoking them on the way to the bank other day. I wish I liked him, dude. They tasted so bad. I was like, I'll buy some American spirits. Wasn't good.

I think he'd get used to it probably. Well, I used to put him in a bong in college, so I was like, I'm good with this. What? Yeah. Did you ever do that? Mix it with weed? Yeah, yeah.

A mook chop. Yeah, and that's what got me on to nicotine because it's really the best feeling I've ever had in my entire life. And then, yeah, just vaped and now Zin's with herpes. It took me, I was in North Carolina last week with my family. It took me like two hours to explain Zin to my mom. Really? Because she found it and she was like, are you dipping?

I was like, no, it's just nicotine. She was like, it's kind of rot your teeth. I'm like, it's just nicotine. It took fucking forever. still thinks I'm dipping, probably. It is. My parents have no idea. I'm like, no, no, Tucker Carlson.

Yeah. My dad's like, oh. My mom would be like, he's a time. Really? Yeah, my mom hates him. My parents, very, very liberal now. I think my parents think my Zen is weed. They know I'm a big pot.

They're like, I don't think he smokes or anything. So it's like, I don't even think they would understand the concept of it. Yeah. Yeah, no, they're not going to get it. But whatever. I was leaving little Zen pouches all over the Airbnb. Oh, yeah, they're probably, yeah. Whenever in my parents, I want to put it, like,

where it's all chill in the living room, I just, like, turn the other way. It's like, wow, Alex is looking at the wall, right? Dude, I was doing, I was just, I was throwing so many, and they're like, why are you doing that before bed? I'm like, I'm just insanely addicted. Yeah, yeah, that's how it goes.

Yeah, I have to tell myself, like, it's two in the morning, stop. Yeah. Let me actually trade this for a vape. Sorry, I just dying. When it hits, like, 10 p.m., I'm like, I should probably stop. Yeah, well, that's healthy.

I don't. Yeah. I'm fucking. The Vileum, do you want to, I have 11s on me if you want to 11. Yeah. But it was crazy. Dude, I, Smok shop guys getting really into him.

He's like, by next week, I'll have every kind of Nickton Pouch. Yeah, I've got the Vilos, I've got the Lusies, you got the tough guy. I'm not gay. Tucker Carlson ones. What? Yeah. The Alps are good, though. I will, they have a different texture and they kind of do rock.

He has ads on him. He's like, most people who, who. Zinn, they put it in their anus. He's like, that's not normal, but everybody's doing it. If you're zen, but my stuff, you don't even have to put it in. I'm not doing it. It's pretty funny.

That's real? Yeah. I'm like, I don't know the statistics. He's just like, everybody I know that's in, they put it in their ass. He's just using homophobia to sell that. It's kind of like the ranch water came out. They're like, this is what a call, but not for faggots. And you're like, all right.

With marketing. Yeah. You're like, how about you just, you know, don't be scared to drink something fruity. It'll be fine. Also, Ranchwater, it's disgusting. Yeah, it sucks. Is it?

I've never tried it. It's so gross. But if you're like Thomas Aeleader, Bill of Bob Thornton, that's kind of... Yeah, you got to be a man. Yeah, I started watching Landman in my house. I just, I can't like Billy Bob Thornton or... You can't like him?

I can't, dude, I just can't. You don't like those team mobile commercials. It was piss me. He's like, I'm just a simple guy. I'm just a fucking retard. I don't even know how phones work. It's like, you're a billionaire. I don't know.

Yeah, yeah. Bad Santa, dude. Yeah. Is Landman good? Everybody seems to love it, but I just, him and Thomas Elliott, I feel like I'd hang out with him and I'd be like, I had a great weekend.

I'd be like, a great weekend or not, did you have a good weekend, huh? Yeah. And they'd be like, back in my day, a weekend was when you picked up a shovel. I'm like, shut up, dude. Yeah, that's the worst. Well, that's how the fucking Yellowstone was.

Yellowstone fell off a cliff. Holy shit. Yeah, the first two seasons, it's like, this is a fine, whatever soap opera. and then it just got so ridiculous every single scene is like some dumb moral speech there's three ways to get success

steal it earn it or fuck somebody with money shut up you whore yeah shut the fuck up just every single Kevin Costner also got to the point where he thought he was whatever the guy's name

he had that show on Fox where it was just like he was being the guy oh yeah It's like him with like a falcon. Actors are very lame. Yeah. The woman was hot and the daughter was hot. Yeah, she's hot.

She was hot. She's a sick rack in that. It's a pro-siphalis and pro-hot daughter podcast. Yeah, totally. Yeah. On hot daughters. Yeah, I like, Costner, he had a really funny meet too, whereas, like, Kevin Costner did impromptu,

improv sex scene now we're getting me-tued. Like, I think, I got to look at a look. of the story because I'm like that's just the funniest headline like he's like no there's it's not in the script but like he just fucking saw my dick here's my dick yes and yes yeah what are you gonna do yes only nose or to spitting you can't spit that's the one that's the one that's the one I tried watching fucking uh the second avatar the other day and to be fair I watched it in my room alone very sad with a laptop and I just could not get into it at all just that the new one that came out there's the second one yeah that's not good

I'm just, I guess. I'm just watching this. I'm like, it's so like, and be fair, and I'm, I'm trying not to be a hater, but I just am. I mean, podcast, you got to shoot on everything because I have nothing to fucking, and to me, I'm like, I just, I picture James Cameron just jerking off all making. He's like, this is so brilliant, the Navi and the, he thinks he's so smart. Well, yeah, he really thinks he's, like, creating the new Lord of the Rings or some shit, but it's like, it's a simple dog shit. It's really dumb. Yeah, and you can easily just be like, like, I'm not impressed by world building.

I was talking about brother with this. Lord of the Rings is impressive because they built the whole language and apparently looked into linguistics. But like, I don't really like Harry Potter or Star Wars because they're just kind of like, here are the globally goops and the gookty-bops? And they're like, wow, how did they think of a how did they think of a teacher that turned into a cat? It's crazy. What a genius.

I'm just like, I don't know anybody could have. Yeah, no, that's not that special. And Star Wars is dumb. I love Star Wars, but it is dumb. Yeah, yeah. It's more on par with like Avatar. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just Heroes Journey, stupid shit.

I just can't buy into a movie where it's like their biggest attraction is like the special effects. But I get it. I mean, you smoke weeds. Like I get like going to get high and seen that. And my buddy sees all the second one in 3D's. It was incredible.

And I was like, that is fair that if I watched it on laptop, I'd be like... Yeah. Well, it's like when Oppenheimer came out. Like, Christopher Nolan was like the explosion scene. It's like the craziest scene.

Like, you're going to feel it in your scene. I'm watching. I'm like, just fucking... It was just a bunch of flashing lights. It was a bunch of lights. It was like, I'm super. He did it practically. I can tell.

That movie I did not love. Did you guys like Oppenheimer? Dude, I was like, okay, they're making the bomb. Three hours of making a bomb, dude. I was like, what the fuck? Yeah, no. I was hoping it would be something fucking amazing because everybody was talking it up.

Yeah, no. At the end of the movie, I saw it was Jeff Levin. At the end of the movie, I look over to her, I go, I like the tits. That's the only part I cared about. Is it the first one? rack in a Nolan film? Might be.

A lot of PG-13s. A lot of PG-30. I'd have to think if Memento has any... I've never seen insomnia with Puccino. I don't think that has any tities. I don't know. Memento might have had tits. Like, I would know, like, I don't know. At that time, I was jerking off the movies, so

I would have it in my catalog. Of course, dude. At the beginning of Naked Gun intro, there's a scene where they go through the shower. And I pause it. Then an airplane, it always posits. Yeah. You're like fucking whack off time. Vacation.

Yeah. She's in the shower. Yeah. Which is so, it's so great because you don't normally jerk off and then die laughing. Right. Five minutes. Such a great post. Yeah.

Yeah. It's a great post. Yeah. As you watch a whole porno and they just start breaking out amazing shows. When I was a kid, I had DVR'd Zach and Mira make a porno. Yeah. And just my parents always be like, why do you Zach and Mira make a porno on our DVR? I was like, just really just really.

really like that movie. Just really like that movie about an hour in. With Katie, we used to whack off because that woman plays the porn stars in a Katie Morgan, I think. Yeah.

And she'd have this show on HBO called Katie's sex tips. And I was talking to somebody else. Comedies in the 2000s and HBO was just, they just made porn for kids. Yeah. Fuck else is watching.

Totally. Like Cat House or like anything like that. And yeah, we'd have sleepovers. We'd all like sit in a different corner of the room and then just watch it and it would be like it would be softcore porn because she's just fully naked and then she'd be like anal is a lot of fun and it would cut to her like getting aspect but it's like from a side angle so you see your tits and you're like this is just awesome yeah that was the best I don't uh I don't think any of the guys like we would watch that stuff I don't think any of us jerked off I didn't jerk off like in a room pool of guys yeah no yeah well I did separate rooms yeah when I was like in like when I was like the eighth grade me and my boys went and bought condoms for some reason. Then we all just went in different rooms and jerked off in the condoms. Yeah.

This is dope. It's like, oh my God, we're never going to get herpes guys. That's what I like about doing this, though, because now no matter what people will listen to the next episode to find out if I have a real. That's true. Yeah, cliffhanger. Stay tuned. Stay tuned.

When did this bump develop? When did you first see it? Monday. Oh, this is very recent. Yeah. Yeah. And it's like, sometimes I look at it, I'm like, dude, that's literally just a pimple. And so as I look at it, go, that's fucking heartbex!

Yeah. Yeah, I've texted to everybody I know in love. Just like, yeah, I've been crying all day. Just like, you know, having just full-blown panic attacks every three minutes. Oh, God. Are you circumcised? Yeah. Ew.

You're not circumcised. No, I'm circumcising. I'm like going to fucking walk around with a fucking shy hallood down there. Yeah. That's a huge argument now. Apparently, circumcision's not as big anymore. Yeah.

I guess it just looks so, like, I went to school with a lot of Canadians and none of them were circumcised. Like, dude, this looks bad. This looks bad on me. Yeah.

Yeah. It just doesn't look attractive. Like, if I was a girl and saw the hood, like, just doesn't look good. Now. Yeah.

Well, and also the funny part, too, is it's like, uh, there was a thing where somebody I know who is, um,

thinking about getting their kids circumcised they're trying to debate it. They were like, well, you know, I talked to this guy who's on circumstance but he said, no women ever said they had a problem with it.

I go, yeah, who the fuck's going to say it to your face? Yeah. I guess it only affects it when you're flaccid, though, right? Like, you're not, like how much,

it probably pulls down when you get a boner. It's supposed to do that. Yeah. Then you wrap it around her neck. It seems like a good place to put drugs. Can you put drugs in there?

Yeah, just put a little dime bag bag right in your hood. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I fucking, all right sorry dad um i went through airport security with like a used bag of ketamine in my thing really right in my bag just no idea you had it no idea it was like open and like it was like there was like residue in there but uh yeah that was bad because they don't give a fuck yeah they really don't i went i went to charleston a month ago i had a tactical knife in my bag and i got to charleston

i opened up my bag and my roommate the guy was with needed to cut something i was like oh i got my knife and i was like holy shit i just went through I just went through an international airport with a knife. Yeah. I'm like carry on. Which is the thing they are looking for. Yeah. They couldn't find it.

Blown away. I was very, I was, yeah, that was weird. That's so crazy. Yeah. And they like,

I mean, I know people that have Lily brought Coke through their bag, like Lily a bag of cocaine. Yeah. And they just do not care. But they say they're looking for bombs. They should also be looking for fucking knives. Yeah,

that blew my mind when I was just like, holy shit, I have a knife here. It didn't bring it back. I probably could have got away with it. It could have mailed it. bank. Yeah, true. Yeah, I used to

have a knife with me all the time. And I would take it on the planes and shit. They never gave you shit. Like, I would have it in my pocket. And just, like, I'd put it in the little thing. Well, now you have your pen like a knife. He has a pen. A hooded on there. Bitch.

Yeah, I lost the knife at the fucking comedy shop. Cocksuckers. Fucking Eddie probably stole it. Dickhead. Why do you keep a knife? I just had one. Sears' mom gave me one, you know, and yeah, I would just have it. I never really, I never used it. Yeah.

Was we were, like, hunting? Like, I noticed some guy who, like, got in trouble in high school because he had, like, his hunting knife. She got, like, expelled from school because he brought a knife. And you're like, he was, like, in his truck or something like that. Oh, yeah. I drove to school with bullets a couple times on accident because my brother went hunting and, like, he used my dad's car. And I just had no idea until I got back in the car.

I was like, oh, shit. Yeah. I could have gotten so much trouble. I would get expelled. I saw guys with fucking. rifles in their back of their truck. But wait, how old are you?

I'm 35. Yes, there's probably like a... I guess, I don't know. Like Columbine was just like a... Everybody was like, that was a hiccup. And then when I was at high school, they're like, this seems to be happening pretty frequently.

Yeah. Oh, there was the... When I was a junior, the senior prank was a fake school shooting. That's a good prank. They stormed the... cafeteria with like realistic

looking fake guns and act like it was a school shooting and they all got suspended and weren't allowed to graduate oh really how many days before graduation was that was a week maybe

yeah you know that's so crazy were they dressed up like school shooters they have like trench kids I'm pretty sure yeah I wasn't during my lunch break or whatever but yeah I heard about apparently they all got tackled and arrested

in their sense well I'll say a good point prank is that's fucking retarded to them, but a good prank does end with good news. So like, I don't mind, like the lottery ticket prank's kind of fucked because then you find out you didn't win. Oh, it's the worst. But like, if somebody's like, I're going to die and they're like, nah, it's just, it's fine.

You saw that one about the frat kids with the lottery ticket last year? No, and oh, that's the best hazing ever. So it was all these pledges. They're like, all right, you're going to go buy whatever, 10 lottery tickets per person. They come back and the, whatever,

the leader in the frat, made a fake winning ticket and he's like dude you guys won the ticket so they spent the next two days they bought security they were like getting bottle service all this stuff they literally had like armed guards walking with them then like two days later they're like hey guys didn't win

that's so fucking funny well I hope they at least got some pussy out of it they must have yeah they must have a sick night they had armed guards covering the fraternity for like two days that is pretty hilarious I mean it's mean but it's pretty fucking Yeah, it's a really good one.

He's like, he hasn't went the fucking lottery. Yeah. What are you stupid? Yeah. To think they actually won it's got a stupid. I guess,

I don't know. Well, they're literally in the process of getting hazed. Oh, yeah. Yeah, they are stupid. Yeah. Oh, he, like, tells other pledge master. He's like, you're,

fuck, I've always fucking hated you. Yeah. It's just Max Keeble's big move where he thinks he's, you ever see that one? Yeah. It's like Frankie Munez. Oh, also, Joel,

I think it bends if you do that. Yeah. hold it exactly like this. So the guy thinks he's going to a different school. So he does everything. Like he like, you know, tells his bully to fuck off, tells like the whole school to fuck off,

like dances on his desk. And then his parents are like, we're not moving. And he's like, no. I knew a guy in high school that happened but he thought he was going a different school on Facebook.

He's like, fuck you, Trinity prep. Everybody's fucking sucks. You guys are all fucking lame. You've always sucked. And his parents are like, this is how you're not going to public school.

You're going to stay at Trinity prep. So the next year you just stay there. Like, A lot of enemies. I never did that to the class, but we would have to write stories every week. I forget what the assignment was called, and every week I would write a story about how either my parents are getting divorced and I have to move to a different town or like my house got hit by a tornado and I have no possessions. I would write all these stories and eventually they like called my dad and was like, is everything okay at home? you guys writing these crazy stories.

I was like, I don't know. I thought it would be more interesting than I've watched Ace Ventura again. Yeah. I did a similar thing. This is the crazy assignment I've had a teacher do in college. He goes, right about a family secret. And I'm first of like, what are you doing? That's fucking bizarre.

It actually sounds kind of cool, though. It does, but I'm like, now this teacher's just a blackmail. I'm fucking everywhere. Yeah, that's weird. He's like, now you have to suck my penis. Or I'm going to guess what? everybody's going to find out that your grandma was a Nazi

but I just made one up I said like my uncle was a porn star and like I made up some whole story about me like seeing his van with bang bros on it and like I made up a whole character what class was this

was English and I made him a whole story like I described my uncle's like this guy with like a ponytail and like wearing leather jackets all the time and I just like yeah and he's like very interesting great story and you're fucking crazy for doing this

that teacher was also crazy too because I had to go to a funeral and then they asked me to like He has me to bring back, like, proof. So I'm just, like, opening this pamphlet of my friend who's dead died. And I'm like, yeah, here he is. He's family. And the other guy, it's enough.

I'm like, no, you fucking asshole. You ask to see proof. Like, yeah. I hate that when they ask for proof. And I hate when, like, you know, Sierra's grandma died. And I tell my boss, like, I'm going to Maryland for the funeral. And it's like, were they close? Like, does it fucking matter?

Yeah. Maybe that's him trying to. to have conversation with you, though. Do you think he was actually being like... No, no, I'm sure he's pressing you. Yeah. You think he was pressing you on that? To me, that's what it is.

Why would my boss ask me, oh, were they close? I guess you, yeah. Like, did they talk a lot or are you just going on vacation? Yeah. I was like, yeah, I'm going on vacation to the sticks of Maryland. That's what I want to do. Yeah, I'm going to Saul's very Maryland right now. Well, and I think the dumbest thing is like,

I kind of get it for work. I don't agree. Like, that's insane they did that. But for college, you're so stupid because I'm like, dude, if I don't show up to class, it's kind of the whole point of college. It's like, fuck this participation points thing. Like, don't be offended for me not showing up. Like, it's like, that's just your

ego. It's like, if I can pass without you, then like... Was it a big school? It was Florida State, yeah. Oh, what the fuck. Oh, wow, I don't know that. Fuck it, dude. Yeah, we had one... One teacher was sick as hell. This guy was like a poetry teacher, but he was also like a stunt double for Patrick Swayzee back in the day. But he was like real grisly, not one of these...

Elliot guy... What was Sam Elyneleon? Not him. But he's kind of like a real version of that. And he's just like, I like poetry, man. I like drinking whiskey and poetry and shooting guns. And he was like, show up or don't show up, man. Whatever you guys want. Like, he was just cool about that. I'm like, yeah, that's a good approach.

And I felt bad when I didn't show up. Yeah, exactly. I think he had sex with students. I hope he did, man. I hope he got that. I knew a girl that was in the poetry, whatever department major at FSU, and she was banging her professor.

That's pretty sick. That's really cool. How old is the professor? I mean, he's probably like 30. Yeah, good for him. One of those. Dude, my public school and my sister was there, there was a track coach who used to be at the middle school,

and then he went to the high school. But when he was at the middle school, he was like fucking this, I don't know, eighth grader or whatever. It was raping? Yeah. Yeah, he was. Jesus.

But then it came out when he was like, years later at a public school, and he just shot himself in the head at the track. this found him dead at the track ponded off if he thought it was like the fake gun they do to start the race he's like hey guys he jobs up with a flare gun

and start so it can go worse then yeah I guess it can go way worse I don't think we had anything not at my school at my brother's school there was a, I think he was the principal and it was like, it was assumed he was having a relationship

with a girl. This was, she was like maybe a sophomore high school. And then as soon as she graduated, they got married. And that whole deal's disgusting. He had to be fired, right? Yeah, he's not.

Yeah, they can't just be, he's like, what, she's 18, right? He just went to a new school district. Yeah. Probably. We had one who, um, He tried to meet like a little girl, but they like to catch a predator at him.

And he was a swimming coach, so he had like a goggles tan on his mugshot. That's funny. Yeah. Bleach blonde hair. Yeah. Dude, and he, we looked up his, you know, but he looked up his registered sex offender profile. By the way, behaving very well. No.

Good job. All right. Good job. Learn his lesson. Yeah. Or learn how to not get caught. Yeah. More likely.

But he's wearing a puka shell necklace. has gelled up hair in his sex offender profile. It's so funny. Like the idea, we were joking about his therapist being like, no, no, no, no, just re-brain. It's a sex-positive guy. You're like a cool sex guy. Maybe get like an earring. Get the Michael Jordan loop.

Yeah. The thing I was thinking about, because I have a joke about like age of consent. I mean, and so I was like looking up to states where it's like Pennsylvania is like 16. No. So I was like, yeah, I was wondering about Epstein's Island. I was like, why did you go all the way over there? Go to Lancaster County.

I know. But I love the idea of him trying to sell Pennsylvania and just not working. He's like, dude, Trump, he got to come to Pennsylvania. He's like, yeah, why the fuck would I go to Pennsylvania? Ew. Dude, come on. He's like, no.

Make it tropical. That's good. He had such bad taste in, well, in women. Don't, you know, I don't, I think girls. I don't think that's good taste to fuck little girls. But also, like, his house, I was saying, it looks like a cheesecake factory. it's like Chinese

than like ancient Egyptian there's no like consistent style to his art and like the He had a lot of different interests Yeah Yeah he had his hands In a lot of different pots

Yeah Everyone always tries to tie back The uh Remember he had like that golden Temple almost Yeah that's the Mossad tie back Yeah yeah What do you think of that?

I think it's Yeah As a Jew I think it's probably Unfortunately True Yeah Yeah

Well, I have a joke about it where I'm like, the joke is like supporting Israel's like trying to support your friend who just publicly beats his wife. He run up, you're like, who started this guys? What's going on? But it's tough. I'm like a full-blown conspiracy theorist and like I'm just scrolling. I'm like, fuck, it's all true. All my people. But yeah, it's not. It's pretty believable stuff.

Yeah. Well, I think of him too. It makes sense that he's an asset to like. the Mossada and the CIA. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He could rebrand himself as like, no, I was just protecting U.S. interests. Totally.

Yeah, just be like, I'm blackmail is good for public safety. Yeah, yeah. He's like, yeah, there was nine terrorist attacks. Didn't happen because I fucked a nine-year-old on a boat. You want me to go back in time and you want to get your head blown off by a guy and CBS? The pictures that came out to, he looked like he was having the most fun of any person in the world. Of course, yeah. He had the sickest fits.

Like, he had really good taste and outfit. I'll give him that. Yeah. Yeah. You look cool. Him and Galane looked happy. They really look happy. They look super happy, dude.

Yeah. They look like best friends. They do. That's what I want. Yeah. They look like best friends. That's what you want in your relationship. They want to be best friends.

Dude. Yeah, it's... I mean, did they ever break up or was just when he died? I think it's like still up in the air if they actually were, like, together or if it was just like a facade to kind of, like, trick people. That's not. That's what I would assume. Yeah.

But they looked in love. I don't know. I don't know. With her, I don't get any sort of vibe of she wants to have sex with anybody. No. Yeah. She gets off on just watching Jeff. Power, control, all that.

Yeah. It is a good angle, though. It's like that's how you get girls is like another girl kind of like. A hundred percent. Yeah. You need to have someone to bring her else you're just a guy. No one's just going to go talk to about. But if you have a girl.

It disarms you 100%. It's like in Seinfeld when Kastanza would show the picture of his ex-girlfriend. Oh, I was saying, she's like hot. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, look, look, I got this one. So it's like transit of property. I could probably get you. Yeah.

I still have my college girlfriend on my Instagram, just in just in case. Yeah. It's a good move. Yeah. I love the idea of like, sure it makes your new girlfriend's very happy. Well, I'm single now. Yeah, I guess that might have been.

issue. Never put her on it. Yeah. Yeah. It's lining up. Yeah. I was just a cool guy I don't post that. I don't post that. I don't do any of that. Here's my hot college girlfriend. Dude, I only dated my college girlfriend too because my

friend who was the best player on the lacrosse team wanted to fuck her. And then I got in a one-year relationship with a girl I hate. What? Yeah, I just didn't want my boy to fuck my bitch. That was kind of what it came down to. It turned out to be more detrimental for me. It's pretty dumb.

Yeah, it was stupid. Look, it was college. A lot of mistakes are making. Sometimes people don't wear condoms. And then, you know, things happen. But the, that idea is really funny with a picture like a party with like Bill Clinton, Donald Trump, and Epstein.

They're like, we can't, no girls are show if we don't have it. I thought you said there'd be girls here. Yeah. It's like, yeah, every there's a party there, it'll be sick, invite chicks. And it's just the guy and his girlfriend. Yeah.

Come on, you guys got to bring. She has like, two. With the girlfriend's friends who have boyfriends, you're just like, fuck. They're miserable. Yeah, that's the worst. When the girlfriend's friends have boyfriends. Not that I was going to do anything, but the mystique, possibly. Ruins the vibe.

Yeah. I'll say this. Like, I went to a strip club with some girls recently. Everybody says a good move because, like, all the strippers will come on to you. It's not how it works. The women just try to get you to give the strippers more money. They're like, give her more money. I'm like, this is not your money.

Oh, yeah. Do you go strip clubs a lot? Yeah. Yeah. I went once and I was just like, I don't know about this. Tell you what I'm going to sell you again. We're going to fucking flash dancers. You're going to have the time of your line.

I went to Rick's, Rick's Cabaret. It's classy. I've been to a couple of weeks, not the one in New York. Yeah. Well, I went with my friends and they were like, you know, they were savvy. But one of the guys was who was pissed drunk and he kept crumpling up singles and just baseball throwing them at the girls. Yeah.

I got to get out of here. yeah there's always somebody acting like a fucking retard yeah yeah yeah but then I didn't like know what to do like my friends made me get a lap dance and I'm like looking over at my friend just like grab an ass I'm like I don't know if I can even touch you right now that stuff does get tricky because I always just they start giving me latins is like what are the rules and then I listen to the rules um but like sometimes they're just like usually they're just like don't um there's one rule because I got a couple lap dances and there was like one rule they were like yeah just don't do this but I think for the most part they're like slap my

Like, it depends. It's like, you gotta kind of be getting a laugh dance to like smack them. Yeah, each girl's different. My friend had to pay off the bounce for like 400 extra dollars to be wearing sweatpants. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah, that's what you can be doing that. It was like how much you need to get in. I like the, I like putting my ass between the cheeks getting that, getting motorboat and butt cheeks.

Really? Yeah, real risky move. Wow. Oh, you like motorboating there. Yeah, like when you put your ass in my fucking face and just, yeah. I can't imagine how you got herpes. I didn't make it a while, dude. Yeah.

That's great. Yeah, I've only been to one strip club. I didn't really enjoy it. I just don't like spending money, you know? It's a tough sell. You're losing money. Yeah. You're not coming home with me.

No. Yeah. I think it's like, it's fun if you go in like a job. You got to go big group. Yeah. You go with three people. It's just fucking, I don't know. I went on Valentine's Day last year with my buddy and it was like, no.

You went on Valentine's Day, dude. Yeah. Yeah, he just got broken up with I was like, you're like, don't even worry, man. Yeah, he gave me $160. He was like, bro, just have fun.

I was like, sweet. The next day he's like, yo, whenever you get a chance, yeah, 160 bucks. Like over a year, I paid him like $30 every month. Because he went in and he did one of these moves. It's like, he was like,

he went back with two girls and he's like, great night, bro. Got to touch their pussies. I was like, dude, that's not, but he paid $600 bucks. I was like, no, you should. You want me, you fuck them. Yeah.

But he made the, move instead of saying like how much to have sex he's like what can I get for 600 bucks and obviously they're gonna be like 600 bucks yeah look at my feet like they're not gonna give you like a good have you have you fucked a stripper not at a strip club but yeah like I met a stripper in DC and then she moved

around here and then she hit me up we matched on a dating app and then we had sex and it was fucking dude she threw it back it was like incredible sex yeah it was so like ungodly it's like I think nine inch nails is playing she had a picture

of Anton LeVay in her room, like the Satanist founder. And I was just like, in this like, it's like blue lighting part. I'm like, dude. It's terrifying.

I can't believe you're alive, man. Yeah. I like leaning in the evil a little bit though. I was like, yeah. Yeah. And then what's the song?

I'm your man by Leonard Cohen came on. That felt like, it's like, oh, I'm, and I was like, this is like fucking cowboy section.

Yeah. Awesome. Yeah. But now I'm a completely different man, now that I'm concerned about this. Now I'm like, you know, yeah, I got to, unless the results come back negative,

which I'm thinking 65% I don't have it. It's not bad. What's making you think you do have it besides the bump? It just looks like, it looks like one of the source. It doesn't look like a bunch of them. It's like just one. Have you chat GBTed it? Yeah, they're, they're liars.

They don't know what they're talking about, man. They're just telling me I have everybody. I don't believe them. Yeah, no, yeah. Google is good. Chat GBT, at least not, I mean, I have no idea which one's more reliable, but Google's making me think I don't. Chow ChbT is making thing.

I think chat ChbT is just going into Google, though, isn't it? Maybe. Yeah. For the most part. Yeah, for the most part. But tune in next week because we're at an hour. So what do you guys want to plug? Instagram, Levi the White.

That's it. Instagram, Alex Ives, underscore standing. Also, this is going to be back every Sunday. We missed a couple weeks because I was doing drugs in Florida with my friends. And, yeah, that's why we didn't have it. I was not. There was no real time. technical problems.

Thank you.