Morning Good - The Little Drug Scientist - Episode 48

Episode Date: October 24, 2021

Special thanks to Adam for joining the show and TJ for coming back on. Follow both of these very funny people on social media to find out more about what they have coming up.You can find TJ o...n Instagram @teejfrancis and Adam @adamchristopherrr also.As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michael_good1125 and on Twitter @agoodmichael.This podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax. 

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:02 Hey folks, President Joe Biden here to say that if you want to be a big time baller to get your dick sucked, listen to the Morning Good podcast. It's funny as fuck and Michael Good kicks ass. Thanks for the F Shack. I love dirty Mike and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They called the podcast? Morning Good, good. I love that. Yeah, it's me with the boner on the front. Welcome to Morning 2.1 and we are recording. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:00:43 Yeah. There we go. Didn't even check the sound. I'm sure it's going to be fucking awesome. It's going to be great. It could be bad. You look high as shit. Did you smoke weed?
Starting point is 00:00:52 I don't smoke weed. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I don't think yours is on. Can you start? This is what my voice sounds like. like, okay, now we're starting.
Starting point is 00:01:14 Now we're starting. We're here with TJ and Adam Christopher. I'm not going to recreate what we just had. Yeah. But, yeah, it's good to see you guys. TJ says he's not on drugs. I'm not. No, last time I was on here,
Starting point is 00:01:26 I took mushrooms. Your eyes are red because you've been coming in your own face. I come in my own face. Well, how else do you moisturize? Yeah. Yeah. How else do you moisturize your eyes? I drink lotion.
Starting point is 00:01:36 Do you? That's a good move. Yeah. It's a good move. Because then you sweat it and then when you sweat it. Oh, it's a moistrizerize it from the inside out. Did you hear that on Joe Rogan? No, I heard it on Toe Rogan.
Starting point is 00:01:47 Toe, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's his brother. It's his brother. Joe Roe, Toe, and Mo. Those are the Rogans. Joe Rogan is actually cousins with the dude from My Chemical Romance. Really? Like the lead singer?
Starting point is 00:01:59 Billy Joe Armstrong? That's Green Day, bud. Come on. Come on. I don't know my bands. You come on this podcast. You say Pop-Funk's right, motherfucker. Oh, Toe Rogan.
Starting point is 00:02:09 Okay. Toe Rogan. Yeah, you guys get it. Wait. But we're talking about drugs. I didn't realize there was a bag of Coke on my table all the last episode recording. Oh, that's funny. I don't do coke anymore.
Starting point is 00:02:17 I found on the ground at the pair. And I was going to test it because I have fentanyl testing kids because I'm like a little science. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't do drugs at all? Big fear of science, this guy. Yeah, yeah. The other drugs I will do moving forward are whippets and ketamine. Why whip it?
Starting point is 00:02:36 I've never done a whip it. What is that? You're mentally challenged for a minute and it's just fun experience. Oh. Yeah, you basically take the oxygen out of your brain with whippets. Oh. It's a lot of fun. You suck on a balloon for a little bit.
Starting point is 00:02:48 Yeah. Yeah. Your voice go high? No. It goes low. Really? But it's only like a minute? Yeah, but it's great.
Starting point is 00:02:55 Yeah. We used to be like the designated driver in high school. Be like, all right, I'll just do 20 whippets because it only lasts two minutes. Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What happens is we found a wippet canister on the ground as kids and we're like, this will be a part of our life forever.
Starting point is 00:03:07 Yeah, yeah. And. Well, clearly, it's a sign of destiny. Yeah, God's like these kids You do like 20 whippets Yeah, yeah You just walk around Florida You see that anywhere
Starting point is 00:03:15 True Yeah, I mean It's on every street corner Pannister Yeah It was a magical thing we discovered It was like shining two In the light
Starting point is 00:03:24 It was just this gold Oh, that's wild Did you know what it was Because I could Oh, of course You could show a wippet thing To my face I wouldn't know what I'd be
Starting point is 00:03:32 Yeah, it's a great time That's what it fucking is Oh But yeah no We just saw it We knew what it was Because we'd already tried it out of the whipped cream. The part that's bad for you is if you do it out of like the regular
Starting point is 00:03:43 whipped cream canisters because that has other chemicals in it. But if you do it straight out of the thing, it's supposed to have like, I mean, you're supposed to put it in a balloon first. It's the healthy version. It's the organic version of whipets. Thank you. Yes. It's one of those. Yeah. Oh, so it's healthier to put it in the balloon first. It's like, yeah, because the balloon, the rubber in the balloon heats it up because the dangerous part of Whippets is when you do it straight out of the canister, it freezes your lungs so it slows the option. Well, you are a scientist. Oh, yeah. That's wild. You a little scientist boy. You little drug scientist.
Starting point is 00:04:10 Boy. Doing little sparramins. You scientist boy. With my body trying different things. Including gay sex. A little bit. Yeah. That's a science.
Starting point is 00:04:23 It's a science experiment. Somebody did it for the first time was like, took notes. You're like, hmm. I don't know. I don't know about this one. This is going to do well in the next century. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:35 But, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, gay sex. Yeah, I haven't had it, but I've heard good things. You haven't had it? He heard good things. But you were kissed a dude on the mouth?
Starting point is 00:04:45 Yes. Same. Yeah, yeah. Many, no, I don't even have to. Many times. Yeah, it feels just like kissing a lady that was lying down on a sandy beach. Yeah. That's what I feel.
Starting point is 00:04:57 What happened would be, I was in Spain and this girl was like, I'll suck your dick. If you kiss that dude on the lips for once, it was a pack. It was like a pack on the lips. And I was like, yeah. I was like, okay, well, yeah. this is out of my orientation. But at the same time, I'm like,
Starting point is 00:05:10 a blow job from a woman. Yeah, let's do it. I did it. I did it. Straight, like, spectrum? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Yeah. It's a good trade off. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. But then she never did it. So, yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:21 Oh, so while you were like going for the peck, she, like, she like, I'm not gonna blow you. She's like, I just fucking met you.
Starting point is 00:05:27 I'm like, that's like, what a hilarious thing. Oh, it's very funny. Yeah. It is very funny. Especially the fact that you're like,
Starting point is 00:05:36 oh, fucking that's it. Like, like she is turned on by that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Like,
Starting point is 00:05:41 like, easy. Yeah, like, in his dumb, like, I just want to get laid head is like,
Starting point is 00:05:46 oh, that's it. That's all she wants. Fuck yeah, dude. And then it gets, and then immediately, it's, oh, dude,
Starting point is 00:05:51 you got got so bad. I got, yeah, yeah. And also, I didn't speak very good Spanish. So maybe I didn't understand what you were saying, but,
Starting point is 00:05:58 oh, oh, uh, I'll call you gay if you kiss that guy. Yeah. He was like, all right,
Starting point is 00:06:05 Sounds good to me. All right, good deal. That was a crazy experience. I went to 14, and the kid I was staying with was 16. So we went like clubbing. I was 14. I had no idea what it was. I started grinding on girls.
Starting point is 00:06:14 They were like, whoa, we don't. I was like, all right, I thought this was a thing. But which is like, if you don't know that that's not accepted, like, it's wildly inappropriate. In Spain? At least when I went. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, it was so like, it was like girls would start dancing on. And it wasn't like I would just come into some random girls start grinding up.
Starting point is 00:06:29 But girls were like dancing by me. And I guess you're supposed to like dance around them. You know what I'm supposed to kind of like. yeah yeah they're they're into that kind of stuff and then they start grinding on people were like dude what is wrong with you I'm like I'm sorry I'm like 14 I was like I don't know what's the rules here I'm sorry I just kiss the guy I don't even know it's tricky place yeah oh my yeah I pecked him I didn't kiss him
Starting point is 00:06:48 you fucking know the difference to you yeah kiss is a kiss dude lips lips lips lips lips lips touch lips dude to be fair if I was under a curse that would count if we did it like before midnight whatever thing I would turn from one thing to another I turn into a frog or something that's a good like indicator within the spectrum I kissed him enough to like break a spell. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it counts.
Starting point is 00:07:10 But, yeah, no, it was crazy because I also, I had one of those phones. I was hammered, I was 14, and it was one of those old phones where he had to type numerous times. I don't know Spanish, so I got lost in this nightclub. And I really had to text him in Spanish where you know you have to type four times just to change the letter. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, what's it called?
Starting point is 00:07:27 T-9. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you want to hit a Z, you got to hit nine four times. Yeah. Yeah. So it was like brutal. and yeah and then he just types S-I
Starting point is 00:07:37 C yeah yeah and I was like I don't even know yeah but it was tough I tried my last text using
Starting point is 00:07:44 10 T-9 was to say that I wasn't going to make it to work and it took so long to type that I just waited for the iPhone
Starting point is 00:07:50 yeah yeah there's no reason to do yeah that's a have you talked about yet
Starting point is 00:07:57 this your whole situation oh yeah yeah I just don't want to do it more just because these are
Starting point is 00:08:03 these are backloged episodes He's going to be released in like three weeks. Yeah. So they already know I got fired. Cool. How's unemployment life then? Oh, I didn't file. I'm going to get a job sooner now.
Starting point is 00:08:12 Oh, hell yeah. Okay. I'm not going to fucking leach off the government. No, I'm just kidding. If I don't have a job in like a week, then I'm definitely going to file for it. Yeah, yeah. Are you still working right now? As of now?
Starting point is 00:08:21 No, no, no. Yeah. That's awesome. That's so great. Yeah, yeah. I just don't want to talk about too much business is going to be in five weeks. Okay, but do you know, last question. Do you know what episode you got fired for or anything?
Starting point is 00:08:29 No, they just told me They said it was a podcast. They said they're like, we heard something about a podcast, but HR didn't tell us. I'm like, I'm so bad at this numerous times, but I want to clip up the worst moments
Starting point is 00:08:40 of the podcast and send it to them and be like, I don't see anything wrong. Point to one thing. And it's just like a compilation. They'll be like, honestly, we just like, come town better. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:49 Your podcast isn't good and we don't want to stand behind it. We actually hired the cast of Comtown. Here's your replacement. Nick Mullen, come on out here. I could see them as reception is just like yeah I go extra money on the side
Starting point is 00:09:01 it's just an ongoing podcast at the reception desk yeah so yeah go go somewhere I can't help you up yeah yeah um well you know Michael I just wanted to say I'm happy to be here dude I'm happy to yeah I like what's happening right now thank you and I don't want to talk about my day
Starting point is 00:09:19 you know what did something horrible happen no nothing at all it just feels weird today it's been a weird day it's been a weird day yeah with Instagram and Facebook being down it's been a disaster yeah well that's why I all my feelings on. Yeah. Did you hear why?
Starting point is 00:09:32 Why? Someone called me up and just kind of tell me why. Apparently, some girl, like, defected is a weird word, but it was the first where they came to my head. I guess she, like, left Facebook or whatever. Oh, she went rogue. She went Rogan. To Rogan.
Starting point is 00:09:44 To Rogan. Oh. I saw this. And that's related to this? Yeah. See, her and Toe Rogan, Doerogan has his own podcast called the Toe Rogan. Do you mind of time? Oh, no, not at all.
Starting point is 00:09:55 Hell, yeah. Oh, I don't do drugs. Yeah, okay. Enjoy that nicotine, you drug addict. Yeah. It's crack cocaine. We got you, you bitch. It's a crack flavor.
Starting point is 00:10:05 It's a crack flavored. You know that you have DMT babes, really? Yeah. Have you ever done DMT? No. But go back to... So anyway, this girl is apparently on 60 minutes today or tonight or last night or something like that. Talking about how Facebook is like trying to corrupt the whole world, which, you know, that's been a thing forever.
Starting point is 00:10:24 And apparently that's why... I heard Mark Zuckerberg is trying to fuck all of our girlfriends. It's part of the plan. He's pretty propaganda. Your boyfriend has a small dick. He's not cool. He's not cool. So I'm single.
Starting point is 00:10:35 Yeah. So I'm single. There's little messaging in there. It's like, do you want a boyfriend with a bigger dick? And it's Mark Zuckerberg. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:42 What if like you find out every woman's Facebook is just way different? It's just all Mark Zuckerberg. Like ripped? Like every you just had ripped. So this is a weird feed. I'm literally just trying to see my friends.
Starting point is 00:10:52 Everybody's profile pictures just a link to Mark Zuckerberg's. Yeah. Or like that picture of like the black guy at the edge of the bed. and then, like, at the end of his dung is, like, Mark Zuckerberg. There's the head. It's, like, his face.
Starting point is 00:11:04 His, what's it called? Hydrofoil boarding video is the funniest. Him of the pale white face. Mark Zuckerberg is like... What's hydrofoil? So it's like a surfboard, but it's got a giant... It's got a propeller, and it glides like a foot above the watch. Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:11:20 Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you got to be a big baller to have one. Those are sweet. Or, like, a Bond villain. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, those are sweet.
Starting point is 00:11:28 It only works like... I want to watch it. I want to watch it. I want to watch it. It's the first movie I've seen. I want to go to the theaters to see that. Yeah. I want to...
Starting point is 00:11:34 I am mad. Nobody liked my tweet. Because somebody was saying James Bond should be played by a woman. I'm like, that's cool, but she's got to be a lesbian. Because James Bond gets pussy. That's the only rule. That's the only rule. It's the only rule.
Starting point is 00:11:46 I don't know why they haven't done this in so long because it's like, it's like... James Bond can be anyone. Right? Yeah. It's like... It's just so weird that everyone's like, no, it has to be like... It has to look. like a certain kind of someone.
Starting point is 00:11:59 Yeah, you know, I could truly be anyone. Yeah, and it's also different for like that. So I think for comic books, I understand a little bit. People are like, I like adaptations that are literally, because it's so visual. So I kind of slightly understand. I don't agree with it necessarily, but I do understand people saying like, okay, I saw Superman like this with black hair. So if I saw a blonde Superman, that might. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:16 Like maybe be a little bit creative. Maybe making a different story because you, some people want to see. Like a parallel universe or something like that. Yeah, yeah. Well, that's one thing they should do with Superman because there are black Superman in the universe. Yeah. But they're not. Like Shaquille O'Neal.
Starting point is 00:12:28 Yes, yes, steel. Yes, exactly. Yeah, great movie. Yeah, I actually haven't seen it. Is he Superman? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, nice. For real?
Starting point is 00:12:35 Yeah, yeah, yeah. He really is. He's like a, like, a variation of Superman where, like, he, like, makes a... The kryptonite is just the police. Like, yeah. He is a cop. He's a cop. Yeah, yeah, like, he just wears, like, an Ironman kind of suit, and he's called
Starting point is 00:12:48 Steel. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Lexington Steel. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. What a hero. Yeah. But, oh, yeah, no, there are these really cool, like, there are alternate.
Starting point is 00:12:57 Like, there are alternate universes where Superman is black. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And so it's like, that's more like, damn right. He's a bad mother shut your mouth. Yeah. That would be funny if that's just how they pitch.
Starting point is 00:13:10 They're like, in this universe, he's black. So you can't change. They're like, no, no, no, no, just his skin color. It's all exactly. And like, everyone's cool with it. Yeah. So, like, isn't this mind blowing people aren't angry men? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:23 But no, it's like, because Superman's name is Cal L. And his name is Calvin Elvis. in like the other, but it's like a different like story completely. I'm like, that's cool. Because there are like, the multiverse stuff does get kind of cool, but I nerd out too much about comic books here. Let's talk about. I don't know anything about that shit.
Starting point is 00:13:36 What? I don't know. Anything about. You love Batman? Two for the show. Three, four, Superman, four, five, six. You know, rock and roll. I know.
Starting point is 00:13:47 Calvin Elvis. Great guy. That would be funny. They're like, he's Superman, but also he's Elvis and he's black. Yeah, I don't know anything. was kind of, he asked. He has that song called In the Ghetto. You ever heard that?
Starting point is 00:14:02 He was born in the ghetto. In the ghetto. That's how it goes. That's how it goes. You heard it. Yeah. But, yeah, I was deep into Batman. Oh, yo.
Starting point is 00:14:13 I don't know a goddamn thing. Oh, there's a new Batman coming out. Yeah, Robert Patton. Yeah. I want to watch that one. I like that trailer. They're doing it like a detective movie. Like, it's going to be like thoughts of twists.
Starting point is 00:14:22 Which, like, finally. Yeah, yeah. Just calm it down. Calm down the Super. superheroes. Just calm it down. Make it more like realistic where it's like, well those plots are the best.
Starting point is 00:14:32 Like when they took Logan, because Logan like, instead of if they're like a bunch of superheroes, they're like, okay, let's focus in on. Yeah, same way.
Starting point is 00:14:38 They did that with Joker. They just like chilled it out a little bit. And they're like, let's make it an intimate story about. Way better than being like, now we're having, just like an origin of superheroes. Yeah, now we're in space for some reason.
Starting point is 00:14:47 Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Now it's like, that's like, that's how it goes. They do like, okay, now animated. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:54 And yeah, and then what happened before this happened? Yeah. Well, because it's hard to, like, make a good ending. So I realize that's what's happening. It's, like, hard to make a good ending for a story. Yeah, yeah. So they're like, let's just tell what happened before the main thing happened.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Yeah, exactly. So all the prequels keep coming. From a different perspective. Like, the sopranos ending. Yeah, yeah, the sopranos ending. Like, it's like a very kind of like vague ending. And it's like, yeah, we're not going to explain that. We're just going to start from all the way in the top.
Starting point is 00:15:24 Did you guys watch the next States of New York? Yeah. No. I didn't. Did you? No, no, no. Neither of I. Okay.
Starting point is 00:15:30 I was supposed to. But then, yeah, I haven't watched any of the Sopranos. Yeah, we were to start with this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. But then, although, arguably, that would be the best place to start since the prequel. Yeah, yeah. I just don't know which Luke Skywalker I want to root for.
Starting point is 00:15:46 Yeah. I haven't watched the Sopranos. Is he in that? Yeah, he's in it. All right, cool, cool. So it was Babe Ruth. Yeah, yeah. It's a whole thing.
Starting point is 00:15:52 That was one of my favorite pranks. We went to go see the movie Doctor Strange, like, She buried with me with my mom. She's like, this is James Bond. That was fun. Yeah, but she's like, this is the James Bond movie, right? And I was like, yeah. Yeah, mom.
Starting point is 00:16:01 And we told her that. And then she watched the whole movie. She's like, I don't see how that related to James Bond. Which is a hilarious. I'm going to start doing that with every movie. Just be like, yo, this is the E.T.'s pretty cool. Yeah. What is that? That's the one where it has Sherlock, the guy who played Sherlock, a Benedict Cumberbatch.
Starting point is 00:16:18 He finds a cape and magic, and he's like a dickhead doctor. But he loses his doctor skills because he gets in. to an accident because he's a dickhead. Yeah. And then he finds magic. What if you, it'd be so funny if they made him like
Starting point is 00:16:32 just like a breast implant doctor or something like that. He's like, no, I can't perform on titties anymore. Doctor's strange indeed. Yeah. Yeah, that was,
Starting point is 00:16:41 yeah, I remember that being, I liked it. It was cool. It was fun. I like when, like, Tilda Swinton,
Starting point is 00:16:45 like, touched his forehead. And then he like goes into like that trippy dimension, like the astral plane. That was fun. I'm very like that. I like the movies
Starting point is 00:16:54 where there's a little bit of, like the first Harry's, Potter I liked because it's like, oh, it's somebody from the regular life going in. But then by the fifth one, there's like, okay, so everybody is a ghost and they're flying around, and then you can't even shit without ghosts flying around. And then the stairs,
Starting point is 00:17:05 there's too much going on at Hogwarts for me to, like, get into it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, your hands are toads. Yeah, not again. Yeah, exactly. It's too much for me to. Yeah, you must kiss my hands. Only peck, though, it doesn't... Yeah. I've seen none of these fucking movies. I've seen zero Harry Potter, zero fucking Marvel movies.
Starting point is 00:17:23 What do you do? Do you just fuck chicks all day? chicks all day, dude. What do you think? Why do you think I'm so late? That's true. Yeah. You weren't, you weren't caddying. No, that's definitely not what you were doing.
Starting point is 00:17:32 That's gay. Yeah. Talking with dudes all the time. Yeah. Yeah, no. I don't even talk to. I'm not my friends with the guys. I'm only friends with the women.
Starting point is 00:17:39 I just have a guy friends who are like, you want to do my podcast. I'm like, I mean, I guess, but it's taking me off my pussy's schedule. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm glad you could pencil us in.
Starting point is 00:17:47 I had to. I had to call up destiny. Big, not today. Bitch. Move some things around. Move some things around. Yeah, just so you can make. I'm glad you made it.
Starting point is 00:17:55 Yeah. No, I just don't watch that many movies. I'm trying to. I was telling my friend I want to be a movie guy. I want to be a cinephile. Really? Yeah. So I started watching Jaws.
Starting point is 00:18:06 Good place to start. That is actually a really great movie. They asked my mom to be in Jaws. What? Hey, Mrs. Good. You want to be in Jaws? Yeah, it was like they filmed it on this beach. She would go to all the time.
Starting point is 00:18:17 Is that about James Bond? Yeah, yeah. She's about James Bond. Sure, sure, yeah. Jaws bond, huh? She, they asked her to be, like, I think they, I don't know if they wanted her one of her friends to be the naked girl at the beginning, but they end up being somebody from her high school. So your mom's hot. Pull up a pick down.
Starting point is 00:18:35 Jamie, pull it up. Good thing that your mom didn't do that. Oh, because everybody would have been like your mom's tits. That would have been great. But also, like, you know about that, like, that scene, that woman got, like, terribly injured. Yeah. Oh, really? She was, like, on a rig to, like, simulate her being, like, tossed around.
Starting point is 00:18:51 Oh, I didn't know that. the shark and like it like fucked up her back or something dang could have been her big tits too yeah that seems to do that to yeah that was Steven Spielberg saying they was like look at her tits that is what's causing the back problem they're like no you just threw her off something
Starting point is 00:19:08 like she clearly got itged on since that's a bigger deal by the way that your mom was asked your mom is so hot I'm not sure she was like let me go I'm not sure she was asked to be that specific she was asked to be in the movie and I think she I know that girl is a girl from her high school so I think oh wow so it was like were asking locals to be in the movie. Local high school chicks with big tits.
Starting point is 00:19:26 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty cool. Yeah, yeah. But I think that was one of his earlier movies, so she's like, I don't want to be in some fucking stupid shark movie. No thanks.
Starting point is 00:19:35 Now it's like, her life took away different trajectory. Yeah. She could have been a star. Yeah. Damn. That movie, everybody, I mean, everybody in that movie is big now. Yeah. No.
Starting point is 00:19:45 And just like two people. Oh. Richard Dreyfus? Yeah, yeah. Who is he, is he the main character? Is he the, he's like this, he's like the, he's like the, he's like the dickhead science guy. Okay.
Starting point is 00:19:55 Yeah, yeah. He's not the Shudgyd-D-Wood. Rob Schneider. Is that? Roy Shider. Yeah, and not Rob Schneider. Yeah, Rob Schneider is like the Jigil-2.
Starting point is 00:20:03 Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's five-foot-two, and then that blow your mind? You can do it. Yeah, yeah. He's a big-time anti-Vax guy now. Really? Oh, yeah. Rob Schneider.
Starting point is 00:20:12 Oh, yeah. On Twitter and stuff. Really? Yeah. That's annoying. Yeah. Rob Schneider, taking a stand. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:20 It's funny when you haven't heard somebody. it's funny if you haven't heard from somebody like so long and then randomly you're like okay I guess you have opinion but it's like yeah oh I forgot you're a person with opinions
Starting point is 00:20:30 and I could disagree with you yeah you're up you're so agreeable yeah yeah yeah I liked you in that one movie he must have the same exact opinions as I did all of his roles though
Starting point is 00:20:42 I feel like are just weird like he's every every movie Adam Sterling writes is like all right here's a weird guy yeah yeah yeah he's like a guy just comes in
Starting point is 00:20:49 and says like one weird line yeah You're like, all right. Yeah. See you later. See you later. Bobby. I go back to having your weird opinions.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a fucking weirdo. I still like the Shedky, you know, a guy from Jaws. So I still haven't seen the movie. I'm like, every time I put on a movie
Starting point is 00:21:05 I don't fall asleep. Well, rule number one for being a cinephile is watch the movie. I know. I watch movies like TV shows. Rule number two, every movie people like, you have to find a million holes in it
Starting point is 00:21:15 and talk about how much it fucking sucks. And you got only like one specifically weird movie that's foreign. Yeah. That's like kind of rule. I'm working on it. Rule number three, like make up some sort of like deeper meaning of the film.
Starting point is 00:21:28 Yes. And then make your own connections to it that don't really actually apply to what the movie is. I'm starting to do that. Yeah. Jaws is to me is about the Jaws of life. Yeah. I heard that Jaws is about communist Russia. Yeah, I could see that.
Starting point is 00:21:45 Do you think so? Is that why it's red? It's so red in the water? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The Russian takeover of the waters. Yes.
Starting point is 00:21:54 And big tits is what Russian dudes who drink vodka love. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. On their chest. On their chest. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:02 They do want their own big tits. Yeah. They want their own. This is very insightful. But it is communist. So everybody shares the tits. Everybody shares. You want tit?
Starting point is 00:22:11 You take tit. That would be funny. It's like, we will all share your wife now. Because everybody shares here. He's like, yes, of course. This works for me. Yeah. It's so funny because every country that I've ever been to, I just assume it's horrible. I'm sure they're great. You know what in your mind? You're like Russia, you're like, no, thank you.
Starting point is 00:22:29 I live in New York City. Yeah, it's just like how it's like told to us like via the news or whatever. So we're like, ah, fuck them. It's cold. It's funny that like we think of Russia where like every dude is just talks like this vodka. It's like no, there's people that go to like literally games. Yeah. They have baseball games. And sound like this. You all catch the game the other day? I love Russia. Isn't that? Like, hilarious? There's, like, Russian Little League games. Like, I just think of Russia as, you know,
Starting point is 00:22:56 31-year-old men in tracksuits. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no women in Russia. There's no women in Russia. Except for big tits, and those are just American women transported in. Yeah. You guys get it.
Starting point is 00:23:07 They're all, like, in cargo holds. Yeah. All the women in Russia are in cargo holds. When they start popping... Based on what I heard about Russia. I just think, when I think of Russia women, I just think of dominatrix is. Because I feel like any weird porn line I watch like that,
Starting point is 00:23:18 they're always foreign accents. And I don't like paying a euros. That's why. I don't watch those videos. Yeah. I know that exchange rate is so annoying. It's complicated. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:26 Yeah. But, 1.5 on the dollar. I don't know what that is. That will take me out of porn, though, if they're speaking a different language. Oh, yeah. I'm not normal like that,
Starting point is 00:23:34 but I'm like, speak fucking English. Every once in a while, I don't mind like an English accent. British, yeah, yeah, yeah. Really? Yeah, yeah. And porn?
Starting point is 00:23:42 Yeah, yeah, yeah. That turns me off. You won't fucking my bomb. Turns me right off, dude. You won't fucking my bomb tea. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:47 Oh. Yeah. Put him a bum. They sound like dudes. They sound like your bros. No, that was the gay porn that you were watching. No, that's disgusting. Holy coke out.
Starting point is 00:24:00 Let me suck on it. I always like the most overexadish. Please, sir. Can I have some more? Come? You want come. Oliver. Oliver wants his mouth full of gum.
Starting point is 00:24:16 That's yeah. Yeah. That's a good song. Yeah, dude. I mean, it was an orphaned, so I'm sure there's a lot of molestation going on. Oh, yeah. Oh, for sure. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:25 Poor fellows out there. Who? Orphans. Oh, orphans. You just watch one movie. Yeah, you gotta watch one. I don't know. I don't even have you on the rest of the episode if you're just, bro.
Starting point is 00:24:34 You're not going to know what we're even talking about. I'm talking about Jaws. We're still on Jaws. Yeah, the movie that you have not seen yet. You're like, I'm going to be a cinefile. I was thinking about getting into Jaws. Oh, by the way, haven't seen it yet. Let's talk about it.
Starting point is 00:24:46 What was Oliver? What was that? It's like a little orphan boy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's based off of, like, the Dickensian classic called Oliver Twiss. You're a Citiophile. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm super into movies. Damn, dude, I'm trying to get so in the movies.
Starting point is 00:25:00 Oliver Twist, they call him that because he gives everybody T-Twister's. Yeah. That's nice. That's a good movie. Yeah. Ow. He's like, hey, so you, stop twisting. That's why I do I paint nipples.
Starting point is 00:25:13 They're always just getting into nonsense orpins. Yeah. They are always getting into nonsense. That's why they beg for change so they can pay for more nonsense. Yeah, exactly. Not because they don't have parents. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:24 Who can't give them in the lounge. It's so funny because, like, when I think of, like, orphans, I think of England, just like cobblestone roads. Yeah, yeah. And some kids, like, my parents don't know it in the fire. Yeah. And you never think of Bruce Wayne because he's, like, rich. Yeah, you never think of it.
Starting point is 00:25:39 Oh, no, he's going to be fine in a couple years. He's going to come up with a bat suit and everything. He'll be fine, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's always, I think of, like, British. And the parents, they never just, like, broke up and then he lost it's always like they died in a fire something yeah and then the villain killed the person's parents you find out in the end yes is that is that how oliver ends that's a lot of movies i feel like
Starting point is 00:25:58 where it's like yeah yeah it's like oh i really screwed your father because i wanted the money yeah yeah yeah it's like the orphan i'm not sure i'm combining like ten things but it's like the kid maybe was like a rich his parents were rich but then they died yeah and then it got like taken by the state and then he becomes an orphan but then you find out the leader of the orphanage killed the parents or something yeah yeah yeah yeah to get the inheritance, and then you realize it's like Willie Wonka the whole time.
Starting point is 00:26:21 Exactly. Yeah, yes, yes, yes, yes. I love those people that just hate Uncle Joe. Is it Uncle Joe? What's his name? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he's just fucking... Piece of shit.
Starting point is 00:26:31 Yeah, dude. Lying the whole time, like, you can't walk. All of a sudden, you win a golden ticket. I'll come right with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, I know Uncle Joe. Now we're... There we go.
Starting point is 00:26:41 There we go. Now, I'll be honest, I didn't know the name, but you fucking, you give me the context clues. Yeah. I was like, I know that piece of shit. Faker? Yeah, dude. Faker.
Starting point is 00:26:49 What about this guy? He just loves chocolate, dude. So we have to describe the characters if you know of the movie. No, you just... Oh, who knows the name Uncle Joe? If you said... Yeah, that is true.
Starting point is 00:26:57 If you said Charlie's weird uncle who was a liar, I'd be like, ding. Bing. Bing. Yeah, Bing Bong. Yeah. I remember, doesn't Willie Wonka
Starting point is 00:27:07 get, like, really mad at them for some reason? Because they, like... No, it gets really purple. No. That's the other girl. Oh, yeah, where he says, I said, good day, sir.
Starting point is 00:27:17 Yeah. he gets pissed at them, right? Yeah, yeah, because they ate like a secret thing that they weren't, like, they can eat everything else except for like that one thing and they ate it. And then they like, they flew for a bit. Yeah. And like, you mess up everything. Yeah, and then he gets very mad at them. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:35 That's a weird thing. I also wonder, like, do you think there's a hierarchy with the umpalumpas? Like, this sounds fucked up. Do you think there's like house umpalupas and then like ones that were training ones in the fields? I don't know if that's a thing. I don't know. No, it just seems like It's just Willy Wonka and then everyone else
Starting point is 00:27:51 Just below him. There's not like a level where he's like You think Willie Wonka had sex with some of the oompa-oompa's? We gotta stop. Against their will? No, because then there'd be a combo. There'd be like an umpalupa who likes having a cane and make a fun top.
Starting point is 00:28:04 But those are the best athletes. It would be the best athletes. They do make the best athletes. I see what I feel like this is I feel like this took a you went there. Yeah, I started. I suddenly, I was like, I suddenly was like,
Starting point is 00:28:20 you think there was house in Belinda? Yeah, so you started. Like barely standing behind the biddy. I was like, this is fucked up, but could we make it funny, me, gee, all right? I'll back out if it's not good. Hold this really quick. I'm just going to run away.
Starting point is 00:28:35 We're like, great athletes. Hey, where did Michael get on? If they have a good riff, then I'll claim it was fine. Yo, guys, I fucking brought up the, yeah, I don't know. That is a weird thing. Yeah, because I like the
Starting point is 00:28:50 Tim Burton one because they really expand on it. He did find them in the jungle. Okay, this is getting more. Because you get a backstory behind them
Starting point is 00:28:58 and he like found them there's like a tribe of oompa lumpas in like some place that doesn't make sense because they got to be vague and they all look the same. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:29:05 yeah, yeah. It's so the same actor that has the same face for all of them. Yeah. What's so funny, Teach you can't say that.
Starting point is 00:29:12 Because he's so high on fucking Wippets. Yeah. Yeah. That's how he parties. Oh, he's so high on pussy. That's what it is. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:19 The P train. Well, it is funny because there are those sober celebrities and then, like, I remember Chris Alia is like sober, but he like, when we find out he's like having sex
Starting point is 00:29:28 with like young or women and you're like, adrenochrome. Is that? Yeah. I'm not saying it, but I'm saying it. Um,
Starting point is 00:29:35 have you ever had somebody try to sell you on DREAM? I've gotten to multiple conversations. Adrenachrome? Yeah, I know it's nuts. What is Adrienne Cohner? I know who would tell it to you. Ah, yeah, we have a friend who, yeah, it gets to do it.
Starting point is 00:29:45 It's the blood of children. Really? People think that, like, people think it's like... It keeps you young. People think that's what Hillary Clinton has for breakfast. Oh, that's like that rumor. Rumor, that's a good way to put it. It's a rumor.
Starting point is 00:29:56 It's a rumor. I mean, people are talking. Is there any evidence to support that will make me go like, hey, wait a minute. There is zero anything. The sports dream. Like, I do think that, like, yes, I think that Bill Clinton's probably had sex underage kids related to Jeffrey Epstein. somewhere in that. But the idea that
Starting point is 00:30:11 there's a cult sacrificing children. That, yeah, is way... That just don't make no sense. There's a little middle ground between those two things, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, it's wild. But it's still a funny thing to think like that they literally sacrifice babies and drink the blood and they're like, well, that's why Hillary is so young. It's like, she looks like a hundred. She's a hundred and forty.
Starting point is 00:30:33 Young compared to who. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah, that is hilarious. Yeah, she's like one of the oldest looking people. So it'd be very shuddy. drug It's the worst conspiracy ever Yeah It doesn't even make sense Support it yeah
Starting point is 00:30:45 Yeah Like whoever says that Like doesn't know What TV is And just has one picture of Hillary Look at her Yeah
Starting point is 00:30:50 She has an age Yeah That's funny I am Good The only things I get into the alien stuff
Starting point is 00:30:59 I'm like deep into the head What's new What's new on that I haven't heard Any new stuff going on I literally Will Google UFO Like once a week
Starting point is 00:31:07 To be like Any updates And there's none But what about That remember like when the virus hit and they were like hey there's actual evidence. People were like
Starting point is 00:31:15 shut up dude, they're doing this right now. They're like hey what about these wasps and the UFOs? They're like no no no we're doing this right now. I do believe that they started dropping that information like slowly like you can look the first UFO big drop was like right around Epstein time. So I think that there are things. Really? Yeah yeah I think they do
Starting point is 00:31:31 strategically have UFO stuff and they want to either they're trying to distract from the events going on or they're just like I do think they're trying to subtly Because, like, everybody's like, we can handle it. Like, no, we couldn't. If they put us down, they're like, yeah, we have contact to aliens, I would be freaking the fuck out.
Starting point is 00:31:46 Yeah. All religion, like, they're serious. You think so? Because honestly, in my head, I think we have, and I'm just like, well. Yeah. Like, what am I going to do? Yeah, no, nothing, man. Yeah, but in my head, I think we've talked to aliens.
Starting point is 00:31:59 I just hope they give us, like, two weeks. And then we just kind of, like, try it up and, like, chill for the rest of, like, those two weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know? But I could see them just being like, All right. They're going to kill all of us. Like, you know what I'm stuck?
Starting point is 00:32:13 And they're like, there is, all right. So, like, let's say aliens do exist. If the universe all started at the same time, they most likely, if they are advanced, they would be like around our time, right? What do you mean? You know, like, if the universe, like, the Big Bang happened, right? And, like, we're a planet that's, like, perfectly positioned. That is a great.
Starting point is 00:32:35 You know what I'm saying? Like, they would be at the same level as we are. Well, the... Potentially, potentially. The idea is that they're... Oh. I've always thought that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:44 So they'd be a tie game because... Yeah, because they all started out as microorganisms. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. But also, couldn't the Big Bang just be our galaxy? Or is it, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:32:55 But it's all of space. The Big Bang was like all of space. Oh, yeah, yeah. And like, space is constantly expanding. Well, I've always said, like, what if people were always like, what if we're the most advanced civilization? Yeah, I was joking about that in the last episode.
Starting point is 00:33:07 Like, they're just cavemen and we're like, fuck, we're going to have to build pyramids. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And they think we have all the shit that we think aliens have. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's actually just cavemen. Or fish people. It's really weirdly specific. Yeah, yeah. They only have shorts.
Starting point is 00:33:22 They only wear shorts. Yeah. That's their biggest achievement so far. We show them shirts and they're like, oh, dude, that's cool. Ancles get to be worn? That's crazy. My chest has been drying up. These shirts are going to keep moist. those stories
Starting point is 00:33:38 They speak perfect English by the way Yeah yeah Whether it's like no English is the correct language You're like don't speak any of that other shit What are you guys doing? What is that other Chinese? No No, that's what we do
Starting point is 00:33:49 No but that's what the most people speak Who cares? English is correct Yeah It just sounds right Yeah You ever go to 7-11 and you can't understand the guy You're like dude just speak English
Starting point is 00:34:01 Yeah it'll be so much easier Yeah these guys speak an alien over here I did pass by someone today who had a very thick accent and he's like, English, please. I was like, all right, buddy. You sure about that? That's fascinating.
Starting point is 00:34:17 Well, because like, you were talking about the ones I think are the most interesting are when you hear the people with the abduction stories because of how intricate they are. Like this one guy had one and what his whole story is, there was like a movie based off it.
Starting point is 00:34:30 He was kidnapped, according to him, by aliens for a couple days. and this guy actually was missing for like four days and they never found... Oh, like a light in the sky or something is that in the film? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:41 It was like a 94 or something that movie came out. Yeah, but it was about the 70s. So these guys were logging or they were like loggers that worked in the woods and this man, everybody describes it the same way. They said the two men in the car were with him,
Starting point is 00:34:53 they said they saw a UFO, the guy walked towards it and something happened where he got brought up by like a beam or something. Then what happens is in his point of view, he was abducted by aliens. The greys were like the first ones, like those little creatures. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:08 And he said they were weirdly mobile. Like, he hit one and it not, and they're like flu. Like, they were like way weaker than him. Oh, they're probably like helium heads. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds like a racist term for aliens. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:19 Which a helium heads. God damn helium heads coming to our country. And abducting our boys. We're trying to have sex with our women too. Yeah. abducting our jobs. Yeah. Come to this country.
Starting point is 00:35:30 They speak English pretty good, actually. I will give them that. Yeah, we'll get that. But that he's... Liam heads. It's fucking alien meds. I want to let my daughter bring home that.
Starting point is 00:35:42 That was like District 9. Did you see that? They're like, they call them like a craw. They call them, not crawfish. What's the word? Like, uh... Yeah, anyways. Wait, what is this?
Starting point is 00:35:53 The movie called District 9. It's about like in the aliens. They kind of treat them like... Yeah, like shrimps or something. Like, uh... Not craw. What do you call them? Prons.
Starting point is 00:36:01 Prawns. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The prongs. Yeah, yeah. South Africa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, and then the guy said what happened was, and then he's like, please connect me to somebody that can communicate with better.
Starting point is 00:36:11 And then he got communicated with people with, like, that look like us, apparently. And we look different because I'm white. But people... Me and you are black. Yeah. Respect. But, like, he said, there's like a blonde, like, human that he, like, talked to for a little bit.
Starting point is 00:36:27 But then the crazy part is, on the other side of things, his two friends got framed for the murder of him because I guess a little bit of time went by people were saying you were the last saw with him so then there was like a trial going on Whoa And so like literally the police Wait, how long was he missing?
Starting point is 00:36:41 I think it was maybe not It was like a week Oh I burped straight into this microphone That's fine, don't worry I farted into it, you're good, cool Not that one that you're purping It's a gross microphone But in his point of view
Starting point is 00:36:51 He says that like I think it was maybe a week I'll have to look up the actual story But it was like a week So like he went missing The cops started framing these people And like literally the man was missing for a week and this was his, so that's pretty crazy
Starting point is 00:37:01 to me that, like, that is pretty crazy. Maybe him and his friends planned it, but that'd be so weird, like. Do you ever think, though, like, uh, like, you know, there's like UFO shows, you know, like, uh, like, what if like half those people that say they've gotten adopt, or abducted or have seen
Starting point is 00:37:16 UFOs? Like, what if they just don't know what planes are? Yeah, yeah. And they're like, hey, before we start this interview, um, first off, do you know what a plane is? Like, what the hell is that? And, like, they show a picture of a 747, and like, that's the UFO. Yeah. God damn it.
Starting point is 00:37:30 Yeah, yeah. He actually just, like, went out of town for the week. He's like, yeah, they invited me onto their ship. It's just somebody being like, do you have a ticket? He's like, I don't know. Peanuts. They're going to be these weird fruits. This fucking baby alien when he shut the fuck up.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Security there was really weird. They were like, maybe take my shoes off. Well, some of the theories are, I've already talked this podcast. A lot of people that, like, got, they think some of it's, people wake up in surgery, if you're molested. Which that kind of does add up. Your brain would process,
Starting point is 00:38:03 it's such a traumatic experience that your brain processes. Yeah. So just like be able to deal with it. Yeah. What do you think about? That's more easy to deal with them like somebody you like.
Starting point is 00:38:11 I feel like there's been a lot of UFO abduction things since like something like MK Ultra. How does that relate? To what you're saying? To UFOs, yeah. So MK.
Starting point is 00:38:21 Ultras is the government testing people with L.C. Right. And people kind of, there's a lot of like people going crazy after MK. Ultra. So I'm saying I wonder if a lot of, lot of things happen afterwards because shit, like maybe they get
Starting point is 00:38:32 molested or something like that, but then boom. Like MKLJ would have fucked with their brain so much and they're like, oh, I went on this trip and they're like, oh, yeah? How was the trip? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And if they're doing similar drugs, it makes sense that everybody would have similar stories. Yeah. But also at the end of the day, let's just be honest, aliens exist. This guy.
Starting point is 00:38:48 The guy that was talking about the guy abducted. One of the first things they did is they did do a drug test for me. They didn't find anything in a system. Pretty good drugs. They went clean. Get out. To be fair, acid, DMT, and mushrooms do not show up on any truck test. So they just test. Oh, yeah, right there.
Starting point is 00:39:02 Yeah. If you're only testing for weed. Yeah. Yeah. It was just like, you guys have been smoking the marijuana. Yeah. But also,
Starting point is 00:39:09 like, I've only taken like half a tap ass, but I don't think you have, that'd be more of a DMT thing being abducted and stuff. Right, right, right. Also, I feel like we're like, we, a lot of times we talk about this and try to, like, disprove it.
Starting point is 00:39:22 It's like, maybe aliens just fucking exist, dude. Yeah, no, no. And that really happens. I enjoy, like, believing of the a list. Yeah, it is a little scary, though, because I heard one thing where I listen to the guy
Starting point is 00:39:31 is like, yeah, there's a lot of aliens. I used to work for the government. The way he described me, he's like, there's these ones that like their eyes are all big and this guy named Richard Doddy. The guy's so confusing, though, because he's also a misinformation agent. It's like the whole idea is that this guy
Starting point is 00:39:44 was meant to infiltrate the UFO community and he gives them false information to like get them up. That's a fun job. But also, he actually drove some guy insane though that I'm pretty sure it's like in a psych ward now. That's not as fun. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:56 That's not as fun. But people say, that what he was doing, they said his job was to go both ways, so he's supposed to see how much they know, bring it back, but they say good disinformation campaigns, you're supposed to actually give them some real stuff. That's like QAnon.
Starting point is 00:40:12 Yeah, that's the theory behind it, right? They say it is like a crazy thing, but then there's like tiniest nugget of truth in it, and then it's surrounded by a bunch of bullshit, because then it discredits it, so if you're like, these guys all things. With the UFO community, they tell them the truth, and then they tell them crazy stuff too. So now everybody, so now everybody, the UFO community
Starting point is 00:40:28 He's like, they're flying saucers and the flying saucers run off bacon. So now everybody's saying this is insane. Anybody that believes in flying saucers is crazy because they don't run off bacon, but it's like really that part was true. Yes, to cover up the truth. You say like a couple of lies on top of that. Yeah, yeah. And then you sound dumb because you agree with this whole set of beliefs.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Yeah, and no one likes to sound dumb, except for me. Be. D-d-d-b-d-b-b-d-l-b-b-ha-b. That was pretty dumb-sounding. Thank you. Yeah. I liked it. it.
Starting point is 00:40:59 It felt good. You'll like whip it, then. Yeah. Have you done them? No. Really? Actually, like, that's the only drug that I don't want to do.
Starting point is 00:41:07 Yeah, yeah. Why? Because it's just like, you just take the oxygen out of your brain. If you do it out of the canister, do it in a balloon. It's the American way. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:18 The American way? Yeah. All right. Not the Native American way. The Native American way is to do it straight out of the canister. Yeah. That's a very big part.
Starting point is 00:41:26 Yeah. That was, I'll be interested Doing peyote or mescaline Yeah Would you ever do ayahuasca? Yeah Is that the same shit? What is peyote?
Starting point is 00:41:37 Poyote is like a cactus And it has mescaline in it Which also the San Pedro cactus has mescalin in it And they Yeah basically just like You take it You get sick you throw up Similar to Iwaska and you trip
Starting point is 00:41:48 But it's different The experience is different They say it's more similar like shrooms And then ayahuasca is more like You're tripping like Full hallucinage Yeah. Yeah, like the DMT stuff.
Starting point is 00:41:59 Yeah, because it is DMT. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I want to. Yeah, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the one where, like, you can, like, live 15 years in your head. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's terrifying.
Starting point is 00:42:08 Yeah. That's, I want to try it out. I think it might be less of that and more like, because I've tried balls on shrooms. And what happens is, it's, I feel like the experience I've had is, it's less that I feel like, oh, I've lived 15 years, but it's more like you feel like, wow, your perception's so fucked up that while you're on the room, you're like, I feel like I've been in this room for my whole life. So it's not like I live 15 years long, but I feel like it's already been 50. Like, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:42:31 That makes any sense. There's a sense of eternity. The trip itself is short duration, but it feels like forever. Right. But I don't think it's like... I don't think it's like... I don't think it's like... You're like, okay, this is year one of my trip.
Starting point is 00:42:43 This year two. Always 15. I think it's like what happens is at any moment in the trip. You're like, I feel like I've been doing this for my whole life. Does that make any sense? Yeah, yeah. Because that's kind of what shrooms are like, where it's like... Your process time's out the window, but it's not like you're like,
Starting point is 00:42:54 oh, I feel like this has been a year now, year two, you're three. It's like, in like DMT, you got to like, I got to get a job, dude. Yeah, it's been 15 years. That's my favorite story. I've definitely talked about here,
Starting point is 00:43:05 but there's some guy who apparently kept doing DMT and the entities got like mad at him. And they're like, dude, stop doing it. The entities, like the gods, the DMT gods. That's pretty funny. He said they go in,
Starting point is 00:43:16 they'd be like, dude, stop. Like, get your shit together. This is for other people now. Like, you let somebody else. You're hogging the DMT. That's pretty funny. That's great. and pretty cool.
Starting point is 00:43:25 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You reach, like, that dimension of the unknown, and there's, like, a circle of people are like, all right, dude, come on. Craig's here again, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fucking give it to somebody else, dude. There's like a picture of the wall, like, don't let me.
Starting point is 00:43:37 He's banned. We had Joe Rogan last week. Again. Sent out. He keeps talking to us about trans athletes. We don't care. We don't. But that is the funny bar that's, like,
Starting point is 00:43:49 those creatures are crazy they describe them. They say machine elves. So, like, they're literally. they look like they have gears and stuff but they're like colorful like weird. Isn't it crazy? That's crazy that everybody sees the same. Same thing, right?
Starting point is 00:44:00 Yeah, that's how the elves look like in Skyrim. I don't know if you ever played Skyrim. Are they like machine elves? Yeah. That makes sense if they probably took it from that. Yeah. That's wild though that everybody does see the same shit. Yeah, that makes you believe like it's real.
Starting point is 00:44:13 Yeah, because everybody sees the same thing. Well, I think it has something to do with, I know like mushrooms stuff like that. I don't really I fully understand it, but in a way it does affect like your rods and it's like, for example, for example, I'd always see blue and red. Like, yeah. And then when you put on 3D glasses, you have like blue and red. So I think it might be, there might be something it's actually doing with your visual perceptions.
Starting point is 00:44:33 I like, I like, well, everyone's tripping on mushrooms. And like, while everyone's tripping too, I go like, I mean, I'm done. They're like, wait, you're not tripping here? No, I'm done. That's great. And you just sit with that until everyone just starts bursting out and laughter. Yeah, yeah. That's pretty funny.
Starting point is 00:44:51 Yeah. I think DMT be crazy because you literally could just be like alright bye guy and then you're just somewhere else my sister said she apparently like
Starting point is 00:44:59 her visual was like an elf as well but it was like some sort of like leprecon type thing and it was like kind of like just kept saying like come here like around corners and stuff and like that sounds
Starting point is 00:45:09 that's crazy yeah yeah it sounds pretty crazy the weirdest one is Salvia everybody the Salvi is just like oh fuck Salvia dude my couch was like a walrus it's like never like normal it's never like a mystical thing
Starting point is 00:45:19 it's just like very strange Oh my God. Have you done it? Yeah, I've done it. What is it? Did your eyes vibrate? A lot of people say their eyes vibrate. No, I felt I drooled a little bit, and then I just felt like I was, like, sinking.
Starting point is 00:45:32 You didn't have any visuals? I was, like, sinking in myself. No, no, and I took, like, a big hit. That's wild, because some people, like, tripped balls on stuff. Yeah. I have not tripped balls in it. But I like watching those videos in YouTube. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:44 Oh, yeah. Oh, people like jumping out of windows. Go crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or, like, they're like, they take a big hit of, like, Salvia, and they try to make, like, a peanut butter sandwich. Just like, fuck it up real hard.
Starting point is 00:45:55 It's always funny. That K2. Way different. Oh, K2 is crazy. Yeah. No, K2 is like what you see like people in the street going crazy like fucking scratching themselves. It's either that or
Starting point is 00:46:06 if you see people like falling asleep while they're standing up. Heroin. No, no, no, it's not. That's also K2. I used to do so much K2 in ice cream. Really? Really? Massive amounts. But like with K2 though, it's like you can get like a myriad of effects, right? Because like,
Starting point is 00:46:20 From what I heard, right? It's like, it's like leaves or, like random stuff. And they spray them down chemicals. So if the chemicals are different, that can get a different. Yeah, because there's lots of research chemicals. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:30 So they're supposed, there's synthetic cannabinoids, what they're called. So, like, they're supposed to mimic weed, but it's like just, it's the same way that, like, you know,
Starting point is 00:46:37 a sex doll is mimicking a beautiful women. Yeah. Woman. Yeah. Yeah. Or women. All of them. But it's like,
Starting point is 00:46:43 all have ten heads. Yeah. But it's supposed to think it's like, it's like so off of what weed. It's like, it's not the real thing. So it's like, I smoked it out of a water bottle,
Starting point is 00:46:52 which is like just the most fake wet, so far from smoking weed out of a pipe, it's like smoking K2 out of the water bottle. No, I don't smoke weed. Dude, when I was a kid, I thought it was so much better. I was like, yo, this shit's legal dog. I'm not fucking breaking the rules.
Starting point is 00:47:05 Right, right. I remember those feelings. Yeah, you're like, I'm not going to break the law. The cops are like, ah, you know what? Good for you, son. You know, it's smoke that's K2. Stick away from that reef
Starting point is 00:47:16 or smoke the chemical plants. It gives you a little pin. you're my little deputy K2s hang with the K-9s. But first time I did it was kind of like that and I was just high as fuck. Like literally I was like I bonged it like a bunch out of like a smart water bottle
Starting point is 00:47:34 And then I drank a four loco just like I was like 14 just putting chemicals Vintage four loco at that point. Yeah, the good stuff Just putting the worst chemicals of my body And I was like I loved it. I was just like an 80 I remember eating a candy bar.
Starting point is 00:47:45 I felt like I was ginormous and small But then I started Smoking it more Because they have different ones They have Mr. Nice Guy And these are Terrifying trips ahead So like
Starting point is 00:47:55 Mr. Nice guy Sounds like 21 Jump Street type truck Oh yeah Yeah yeah yeah Well I love that scene Yeah That's a movie You guys want to talk about that one
Starting point is 00:48:03 No No No No You don't know It's a good movie though It's a good movie though It's a good movie
Starting point is 00:48:11 Shut the fuck up Tj Shut the fuck up I'm a Cinephal No I won't allow it And then I spoke to Mr. Nice guy And it was like
Starting point is 00:48:21 I'm riding on my longboard And just tripping like Not like tripping But like you It's very like pulsey Like I don't know how to describe It feels very like Like you're kind of like
Starting point is 00:48:30 Like weed in a way Where your brain's kind of It feels like it's on a treadmill Almost where everything's kind of coming at you And then the second time I smoked in I felt like I was sinking into my bed And it was kind of terrifying So it was never very good
Starting point is 00:48:40 Yeah But there are people that like full freak out They have like horrible experiences And they start like Yeah like attack people and stuff. I don't people have seizures on it. It's very costly. Yeah. So what is the drug when people are on the street like fucking
Starting point is 00:48:52 rolling around and like scratching their head? I think it's a mix. Is that bas salts? I don't know because I've done bas salts too. It's a complicated thing because I think... What are bath salts again? They're called synthetic catherine it's a list of drugs that basically like there's like ten different drugs. One of them mimics Molly, one of them mimics math. What's the one that
Starting point is 00:49:08 you like a puffers? No, no, no. Yeah. Flaka. Flaka? The one are you... Popper. Oh, you're thinking of poppers. That's different.
Starting point is 00:49:19 That's a needle nitrate. It's like a... That made my head feel clear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It opens your assholes for gay sex. That's what they say, but my butthole didn't do anything. You're like, nope, this is...
Starting point is 00:49:30 This is for the Lord's buttle. Yeah, this one doesn't get loose. Oh, man, yeah. Yeah, I just felt clear-headed. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I should not do this anymore. I should have been... I picture you're just like in, like, a leather daddy
Starting point is 00:49:42 nightclub. You're like, where are you? am I right. I am ready for this. Never mind. I got to get my shit together. That would be a drug that just sobered you up to the point where you're like, what am I fucking doing? But what are you talking about? Weird drugs.
Starting point is 00:49:59 I think what happens to a lot of these crazy drugs. I think PCP is generally a pretty dangerous drug. But I think also it happens is schizophrenics do drugs and it amplifies the shit they have. Yeah. Because I knew somebody is schizophrenic and they smoke weed and like it was a lot of stuff can go bad. What they get up to? They're dead. Yeah, marijuana kills. It has nothing to do with anything
Starting point is 00:50:20 else. Yeah. Yeah. Now, they are, but anyway, that's all. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. So people who are on schizophrenic, they're on schizophrenia. Who smoke weed. Wait, they just, like, go bad shit? Not always, but I'm pretty sure my buddy was describing
Starting point is 00:50:36 was sort of like, it's like, when those people do other drugs, it's pretty dangerous. Yeah, it's dangerous for people with, like, uh, pre-existing conditions. But they used to test. They used to test people. So, like, the guy who wrote One Flew Over the Cuckus Nest, the book, was a janitor at Psycho.
Starting point is 00:50:52 Yeah, yeah. He was a janitor at a psych ward and he would do it so he could get access because they would just give a bunch of acid to like in the 60s. Yeah. That's awesome. I would love that. He's like, yo, bro, isn't this acid six? The guy's like, ah! He's like, man, he's not having the same reaction.
Starting point is 00:51:08 I'm about to write a book. You guys, you know, some guy can't handle his acid. But I think a lot of those people, they do those drugs. Some people argue that PCP isn't that bad. It's just the people doing it. Because sometimes you jump, think about this. Like, the people, if a drug has a horrible reputation and you do it,
Starting point is 00:51:27 you probably don't care a lot about your life. So these people are, a lot of people that will do certain drugs with horrible reputations are already so far down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In their life, because they're like, I don't care about anything. I'll do this drug that everybody says it's so dangerous. Yeah. When really the drug might not be that dangerous. It's just people doing it.
Starting point is 00:51:43 Because it's like, people are like, oh, people take people. PCP and kill people. It's like also the people that are murderers might be people that do PCP. Yeah, that's a good point. Shit. It's well thought out. My father did PCP. What do you say? He said he He didn't say as much as attack us.
Starting point is 00:51:58 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He wore a cowboy hat and cowboy boots and walked on the beach. That's not that bad. Yeah, and I was like, is this a metaphor? What if he was like, it was a nightmare? Like, he was like, I destroyed my life. Never do this, Adam. Yeah, yeah. No, he said,
Starting point is 00:52:14 he was scared and that's why he's never done like acid or mushrooms because like I'm like well PCP is definitely not way different way different yeah yeah yeah that is funny though that he felt he's like that would be a funny like way to logic he's like if I put a cowboy hat nobody will fuck me I'll feel safe they'll think I'm a tough guy just cowboy hat and cowboy boots and I'll walk on the beach just in case I need to get away from the land that is like a weird drug mindset like I remember I used to smoke pot when I was a kid and I freak out and I go take like a shower somewhere like the weirdly specific things you do be like I I'll smell like weed.
Starting point is 00:52:45 So, and then my parents are probably just like, why are you showering at 4 o'clock in the afternoon? Around 420 in the afternoon. Yeah. Yeah, I used to do. I'll come home and I'll freak out. I'd be like, I'm going to take a shower and then I'll just do that. Like, I'd act really abruptly. And then I'll be like, okay, I'll eat some candy bars.
Starting point is 00:53:01 So my weed doesn't, my breath doesn't smell like weed, but I can't eat too much. I was so scared. Like, I would be so weirdly specific. I can't eat too much candy because I do shit to get caught. I think it's Halloween. Yeah. That's where this cowboy had, cowboy boots. I'm not a marijuana.
Starting point is 00:53:14 Tell you that much. I'm just, I'm like looking out the window like a, like a conservative, like a 50s conservative. I'm like, I heard there's a bunch of pot smokers in this neighborhood, not in my wife. I'm telling my parents, I'm like, you know, I think I'm going to vote for Ronald Reagan. Just like weirdly. Just like shit talk to other people. Like, I heard Bill down the street smokes reefer. We should get him kicked out.
Starting point is 00:53:33 She's like, this is all me just trying to cover for the fact I'm high. What if that was the way? Anyways, heading out to vote for Reagan again. It's 2014. Yeah, I just think I'm going to write him in. Yeah. Really love his policy. January, Michael.
Starting point is 00:53:51 It's 9 a.m. on a Thursday. Go to school. Yeah, but Reagan, good actor, you know. Got to have him in there. Got to put him in. God bless her Patriots. Yeah. What if everybody who's against drugs is just covering for the fact that they're
Starting point is 00:54:06 stoned and they're like, this is their father of this response? Yeah, because those are the same people that, like, sleep with the hookers. And they're like, nah, no hook. No hookers. No hookers. No, no hookers. Yeah. That is,
Starting point is 00:54:16 yeah, that is complicated stuff. There are a lot of gay, isn't there a lot of gay homophobic people? There's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, politicians,
Starting point is 00:54:22 mainly, I feel like that's mainly who it is. Politicians are like gay people can't get married and that it's like a week later. I can relate because I hate McDonald's and I had McDonald's today. Oh, yeah,
Starting point is 00:54:31 you get it then. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, all right. Yeah. We just start a group against McDonald's. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:37 Yeah, they have a two-for-six deal going on. Oh, that's pretty great. And I hate that. Yeah. I ate it just so like they can get rid of it sooner
Starting point is 00:54:45 Yeah I forgot how much I like I've been eating so much Dollar sliced pizza That I had McDonald's I was like this is fucking delicious I love McDonald's Yeah
Starting point is 00:54:54 There was a woman though It's so funny Because like you go see You see him dump a bunch of salt on it And there's this one when she goes up They make her home nail She's like can I have no salt on my fries And like they look like they did not know what to do
Starting point is 00:55:02 That's a crazy request Yeah At McDonald's Yeah Don't go to McDonald's if you That's crazy Well apparently they stop putting salt After like 11 p.m.
Starting point is 00:55:11 or something. Really? Yeah. It's weird. And I've experienced it too. If you go to McDonald's late in the night, there's not going to be any salt in your fries. That's weird.
Starting point is 00:55:20 There's so extremes. I feel like literally, if you get, it's been true for me. I'm going to try it. Social experiment. Yeah, yeah. I, um...
Starting point is 00:55:28 What's the reasoning? Health? At 11 p.m. They start getting healthy. The blood, whatever, blood pressure gets too high or something. It's like,
Starting point is 00:55:38 that's dangerous or something. I don't know. There's so, but I like, I like how literally you'll get a burger and they'll ask you to put less salt. So it's like, oh, you're literally putting salt on top of the burger already has it.
Starting point is 00:55:47 Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah. I think you literally order a water at McDonald's and they just dump fucking. Like, it's crazy how much salt they put on everything. Oh, dude, it's insane. It's pretty taste out of salt and everything. I'll put salt in chocolate.
Starting point is 00:55:58 Oh, yeah. Like sea salt brownies? Dude, salt on bagel pizza. Yeah. Oh, dude. Great. Wait. I don't think I've tried this.
Starting point is 00:56:06 I've tried onion salt. Like regular salt on pizza? You never had sea salt? Oh, yeah. You know when you get the dollar slice? and you put all the seasonings? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:13 Slap some salt in there. Dude, sea salt when it's like bigger and crystallier. The flaky seasol. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, dude. Oh, dude. Fuck, can you get it, dude? Talk about that.
Starting point is 00:56:24 Don't talk about movies ever again. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just talk about salt. Guys, I'm just trying to connect with all my homies. It's never going to happen. I love movies. Oh, there's Maladon. It's a good movie.
Starting point is 00:56:33 Shout out to Maladon. Is it different to Megalodon? No, no, it's a type of sea salt that has the flaky sea salt. Okay, it's not related to the megalodon. the shark. No, no, that's cool too, though. Shout out to Megalodon. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:44 Absolutely. Shout out to Channing Tatum. Yeah. 21 Jump Street. Yeah. Don't fucking talk about it. TJ, don't even try. All right.
Starting point is 00:56:54 I'm learning about movies. Once I see Jaws, I'll know most movies. Yeah, yeah, you will understand. When do we start recording? I think it is so funny because we only have like a couple minutes left. But is there anything you guys want to promote? I want to promote Adam's social media.
Starting point is 00:57:08 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even though IG is down. Yeah, we will rise again like the Phoenix. Yeah, just Adam Christopher. Perfect, yeah. Three or four R's? Yeah, three R's at the end. But once you write Adam Christopher,
Starting point is 00:57:24 you'll see my brown bubbly face pop up. Oh, there we go. Hell yeah. Just T.J. Francis. Yeah. Nothing crazy. Isn't it Teage? Teach E.J. Francis.
Starting point is 00:57:34 Yeah, to each J. To each J. To each day. To each day. Francis. Yeah. Yeah. So that's pretty tight.
Starting point is 00:57:41 All right. Vote for Ronald Regens. Yeah. Took anything in this podcast. Yeah. Yeah. All right.

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