Morning Good - Who's Gonna Believe You? - Episode 135

Episode Date: November 23, 2022

Florida comics, Christophe Jean and Tony Wellons join the show in New York City for today's episode. They talk about St. Cloud, Florida militias, Michael's other house, and being afraid to take an IQ test as an adult.  Thanks to Tony and Christophe for making the trip up north to join the show again. Shout out to Christophe for making the move to NYC, so follow him for more info on live dates in the city. For more from both of these guys, check out previous episodes of the show and click their links below. You can find Tony Live in Orlando, Florida or on Instagram @tony_wellons. Christophe is on Instagram at @chrisjeanofficial. He also hosts the Jean Jax Podcast and an official Snapchat series called “One Question”. As always, find Michael Good on Instagram @michael_good1125 and on Twitter @agoodmichaelThis podcast was produced by Paxton Fleming, you can find him on Instagram @yaboypax 

Thanks for the F-Shack. Love dirty Mike and the boys. Hey, are you dirty Mike and the boys? How you know who we are? What's this? They called the podcast? Morning good. I love that.

Yeah, it's me with the boner on the front. Welcome to morning. Yeah. All right, we're here. We're here with Christoph, Gene. Yeah. All right, we're in. And racist comedian Tony Wellens.

Yeah. I guess that's my reputation. No racist. Tony Wellens. I didn't think that you were going to... Last week at the grizzly pair. For three people. Tony was quoted as saying,

get that monkey out of here. A direct quote from Tony Wellens. You're on 2020's racist comics to watch them. Yeah. You're on the clans of your three lists. Daily wires. Races comics to watch. I want to fucking DeSantis disciples

Bro, that's young Ronnie D. I do serve in the DeSantis Task Force. You do? Yeah, dude. Yeah. He gets out there, bro. I just want to clarify, you didn't call anybody a monkey, right? Okay.

No, no. Is this really recording right now? Anyone a monkey who wasn't being a monkey? You know, if they were just being one. He did. There was a point in the set where, like, I was stumbling on words. Like, and he was going, like, uh, and he was like, uh, and he's like, oh, I. He made fun of you?

He called you a monkey? Yeah, he was like... Oh, no. See, it's okay to call... I was talking about this last bit. It's okay to call white people monkeys. Yeah, that's okay. Like a mayonnaise monkey.

Snow monkey. I've never heard that. Manage monkey, but it's... That was interesting. Thanks for getting me on that show, by the way. That was really funny. Dude, I get a call with... So, like, my friend passed away,

and I'm going to tell you guys, I'm hanging out with, like, his family at dinner. Yeah. And I get a text message saying, Tony's getting yelled at right now. Dude, first of all, I hope the host is hearing you can go fuck yourself. You stupid bitch.

She was, dude, she was such a comment on. I have no idea. You don't say these things. But she was just like, I didn't like how she. To be fair, I don't know who the host was. So I can't. I didn't like that she took the side. He was clearly crazy.

I talked to him after like wildly crazy. He said he was a comedy expert. But he's the funniest job. I'm a comedy liaison. He doesn't do comedy. Like, he was saying the most ridiculous things. And I was like, well, if you're a comedy expert, you know you were a shitty. audience member for just stopping

the show when there's three people. Like you made it about yourself. It wasn't about ending. Oh, for sure. Yeah. If you ever think somebody's doing something racist, then you would talk to them after the show. Because that's how you like... I mean, it was bad enough. Yeah, yeah. It was bad enough, but then you just get booed by everybody if you were genuinely

just being a shitty guy. Well, of course, it doesn't help my stance, but there was two like older white guys who were clearly racist. They were on your side. They were on my side. They were like, we support you, boy. saying what you're saying. He didn't say something about like these political erect pussies.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like the class. That's like the worst thing too. I hate being lumped into those guys. If you like, I don't know. Like I've just, I've had things like that I put online that are like a little edgy or something like that. And to me it's just I'm just being funny and it happens to be about like,

I don't know, something dark like suicide or something. And then, you know, you catch a comment that's like, yeah, fuck these woke fuckers. Dude, I just made a, silly joke about killing yourself. Like, I'm not fucking, I'm not your hero.

Yeah, shut the fuck up. Yeah, they're hopping on your back a little bit. Yeah, they're like riding your dick and like, you, you voted for Trump, right? Yeah, right? I'm like, no, dude. They just love you, like, because they think you stand for something.

They just project it on to you. Oh, for sure. Yeah. This is the guy speaking up for it. Yeah, I don't want to be painted like that. No, yeah. A brave young, edgy white comic. It's like, dude, I'm literally just

have a fun, dude. I'm literally just good on. What of my buddy's, Pulled up the funniest thing. It was like Aziz and Sari came out with his new special like four years ago or whatever. Yeah.

And he goes, it's really cool to see a calm up standing against PC culture. I'm just like, where have you been for like? Aziz. Yeah. Finally,

Aziz stands up the woke mob. Yeah. That's what I think the best is just like do whatever you think is funny and don't like, you know what I mean? It's like don't be like, because don't claim some goofy side.

Yeah. The sides thing is so annoying because there's the other side where it's like people that are like, get offended. it easily. And then there's the guys that are like, dude, we need a fucking, like,

comedy's under attack. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not. It's not under attack. If anything is, okay. It's good. Yeah, it's good. Like, because then if you cross the line and you do it well and, like, correctly, then it, like, it makes you seem like smarter than what it really is. Because, you know, I feel like that's what everybody thought when you did that, right? Yeah, everyone was like, wow, is this George Carlin up there?

It's incredible stuff. I want to know, is it really like that in New York? Like, no, I've only been, uh, I mean, like, it is a thing where, like, obviously, Getting called racist, it happens, right? Most of the time it's like a homeless guy you don't get money to and he's like, you're racist. I was like, I... Yeah, that happened to me.

Yeah. But I did spit on him right before. No, it wasn't a homeless guy. It was a guy. He took a picture of me and this other comic. We were walking down the street. He like jumped in front of us with like a Polaroid camera. And then he took a picture of us.

And he was like, yeah, you know, give me, you know, just give me anything for the picture. We're like, oh, we don't want it. And he's like, no, no. He's like, come on, man, I'm a good. And he says, he hard all right. He's like, no, I'm a good one. Like, trying to, like, almost like race bait us into feeling bad about not

giving this random guy who took a pole. It was very strange. Yeah, yeah. He's like, I got weed. I got, he had, like, a table full of shit. And, like, I'm like, what are you? You're just trying to hustle on us. I'm like, dude, fucking leave me alone.

Yeah. And then he robs you, and he's like, I'm a bad one. You may meet evil. It's the oppression of the white man. It's like Dr. Jackwell and Mr. Hyde. That's why with somebody, With somebody called racist, I'd go yes

At no point When you defend yourself For not being racist Do you sound It's just like when you get a... Because you get more Because you're like, I'm not racist I have one, two, three

I have four black friends Yeah You're like Marcus Jamar Like wait a minute No he's Mexican He's not black Shit

Does Dominican count? It's very confusing Dominican I don't know Dude I don't know about Dominicans I genuinely don't Because they are Hispanic They're Afro Latino But they do say the N-words.

So, like, for years, I thought, yeah. Bro, our boy last night. That means they're from Africa, right? Well, yeah, I mean, they're like, uh, I believe it's like slaves. I just realized the word Afro comes from African. Yeah, but yeah. Yeah, Afro, Afro Latino. But like just AFro, like having an Afro.

I think Afro came after the distinction from Africa. But you think they're, if they're separate? No, no, no. Yeah. Yeah. that the term afro was in reference to things from Africa

like Eurocentric like a Chinese guy hair coat would be like a Chinese out now that's it doesn't No it was she I don't think there is like

a word for that it's just straight hair Yeah yeah yeah Herocat what What are you trying to do That was a very bad

Asian Was that just the Asian? Yeah that was really bad That was horrible You sound like Ray Romano. That's because I'm not racist. That's a funny.

I'm a Chinese guy. I love being Chinese. What the fuck? Wait. Let me even attend. Let me hear your best one. No, I'm not going to do that. Not on a broad, not on a broadcast like this.

I'm not doing it. I always end up doing Japanese, but that you just... Japanese are good one. I can't... Japanese is almost like French, but like, like, like, the... Japanese and Korean, but the attempt at it. Japanese are French? No, no.

They are. I'm good. I mean, you're almost. Oh my goodness. I'm Japanese. It almost sounds Japanese. But that's doing French. This is on Japanese.

Yeah. Michael Good. I'm from Japan. I saw an Italian. Yeah. Dude, there's an Italian. This guy. It is the funniest thing I've ever seen.

Because he goes, I could give me money. I had not even kidding. Dude, he sounds like Mario. He sounds identical. That is how it goes. He goes, You have a quarter. You have a penit.

And I'm like, Oh, come on. I need a song. Give my dollar for a spread. That's actually a relief. Most of the homeless people. He's like sipping a tiny cup of espresso. You brought up the funniest angle.

I've never heard somebody. He goes, because most of the time, if you nail an accent, it's not racist. It's like you're actually really good impressionist. If you can nail it, I think so. If you can do it perfectly, yeah, maybe. But the funny part you brought it is,

you could, argue the other side of it would be like, I'm so bad at accents, because everybody sounds the same to me. Well, that's not even true, because just most people can't do accents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I like, I like this attempt to being like, no. Listen, bro, I usually kill, I could kill that accent, but... You want to hear me do a Japanese accent? Just like this. This is a Japanese accent. Because, you know what? They're no different than us. No, that's insane. That's like the, that's like, yeah, like, that guy was black.

I didn't even know. Like, what are you an idiot? Like, of course he's a black guy. Yeah, it's like, you don't see color, but you hear it. I remember this dude, he got so mad at me. I was at an open mic in Orlando, and I was talking about, someone goes, oh, you know the comedian Lunel? Yeah.

I was saying, do you know Lunell? You know, like, do you know, like me? She's from Borat. And he's like, oh, what does she look like? Lynette. Lunette. And I go, oh, she's like the fat black lady. Yeah.

And then this black dude overhears me. And he goes, what the fuck is that supposed to me? Oh, Lunel's just a fat. black lady? Yeah, she's fat and black. Yeah, she's an overweight black woman. I don't... You're a poor black people in Borat that limits it pretty well. Yeah, she's in Borat. She's an overweight

African-American. She's not the guys in Atlanta. I was like, yeah, should I said overweight African-American woman? Like, what would have been better? Yeah. And then the guy was like, I was just fucking with you. I'm like, I don't think you were dude, like you butted into this conversation. It's always a funny thing to bust the balls and be like, oh, okay, now you defended yourself. Now I... Yeah, and then he like, he cowered back and I was just like, dude, like,

what do you want, how do you want me to describe it? It's also like our terminology is all kinds of fucked up because it's like the African-American thing doesn't make sense because there's white Americans. Right. It's all it's all confusing. Yeah. I know plenty of Zos, bro. I'm in the fuel with my Zos, you know? Your Zos?

Yeah, Haitians. Yeah, Haitians. Oh, they're called Zos. Yeah. Is that why Gorilla Zoh is, oh my God, I never put that together. Yeah, no Haitians. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Sa Pace. Na-pacet. Nabilet. Come on, bro. I've been to Haiti and I don't know anything. Yeah, you're from the city, dog. I thought you'd be culturally.

Well, you're from Tampa, Orlando. Orlando originally? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Winter Park. Winter Park. Yeah, it was Michael good from Winterport. I think my last episode with us was trying to defend. My parents not being rich.

It was just not working. No, but one time you said, you said some shit like, oh, our other house. Yeah. Yeah. Bro said his other house. Just our house in the Hamptons. The mountain cottage. Tisba de cottage.

on a mere 400 acres. It's really... It's so funny though because especially hear people like shit on rich people and I'm like, hey guys, they're not all that bad,

right? You had your fucking maid bringing us drinks the whole time during the show. Your butler. Yeah, she's making

chilaquilas in the fucking other room, dude. But yeah, dude, I mean, I'm like middle class, upper middle class. I don't have room to talk,

really. Yeah, like I can't relate to like, you know, the struggle. But I've also talked about the rich people in Florida are just way better than the Northeast rich people. Like I have some rich people better people.

Well, it's like, it's like every rich, like really rich guy I know in Florida is like a drunk dad who wears sparries and smoke cigars. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's different than like a turtle neck wearing guy. They're vibe in, dude. They're like golf drunk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

It's fun. I'm like, this is like a good way to live. Yeah, they kind of rule. Yeah. They're just drunk driving in their fucking range rover. Well, what's the rich down here? Like, there's like, there's like. They're snobby.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they're more uptight. Yeah, that makes sense. I mean, I could see it like, it's like, like, Nantucket and, like, Martha's Vineyard. Rich. Like, yeah, like, just kind of like vineyard vines. Yeah.

But down south, it's like, I don't know. There were rich kids who, like, got way into, like, redneck shit. Yeah, oh, for sure. Yeah. They were so into redneck shit. They love their lifted trucks. Yeah, yeah. And they love their, I'm like, you're, I know your father.

He's a real estate mogul. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know who your dad is. Yeah. And he owns a massive real estate firm. Yeah. Any lifted truck, if it's a lifted F of 50 with like nice rims, they're 100% blasting like young doll. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, they love that kind of music. But you have a like Trump flag in the back of your bed too. It's really confusing. It's a really odd mix. And then also, bro, I don't know. There needs to be a word for that. Were you talking about this? It's like, it's like a camo hip hop vibe.

It's like this weird thing. Yeah, yeah. You see a guy with like a chin strap. Yes. Beard. Yes. He's got like a gold chain, though. Yep. Cammo shirt.

plays baseball a lot of the time. Yes. It's dip, weed, and rap. Yes, yeah. And Xanax. His name's probably like Bryce. Yeah, oh my God. Or like Bryson. He hunts, he hunts. Hunter is also another big name for them, Hunter.

But he can also weirdly relate to some of the rap music because he's like, I got my guns. Yeah, yeah. And he sells Xanax. He's a genuine drug deal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like my father's friend is a pharmaceutical rap and I I steal Xanax from the Pfizer offices And you're like, oh, cool, man, I'll take some of those

And he like gives it to you for free Because he wants to be your friend Because he's really lonely He's deeply alone He's just like a lot about this, Christop No, but that was... This is like 80 people This is like my high school

Yeah, where'd you go? HB Plant High School Oh, okay, yeah Panthers home up... She went to Plant. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, dude. How old's your GF?

She's my age, so she, Or she's like six months younger. I'm a bit of a peto. Rock of the cradle, brother. Yeah, yeah. So I'm 25. She's 24? No, she's 25.

Oh, okay. But I turned 26 next week. She was in the grade below me then. Yeah, but she was very popular in high school. Yeah, me neither. Yeah, yeah. But it was one of those where... I still got so much pussy, though.

Yeah, of course. I want to make that clear. I got a ton of pussy. Yeah, I was kind of like the dark horse of the pussy community. They were like, he's a lone wolf. No, don't worry. I was popular. And I didn't get enough pussy.

I got no pussy. That was the thing, too. Because I was more popular in high school, but there was cool kids, and I was like, there was cool kids that just did not get pussy at all. Yeah. I realized it's the girls there are not,

wasn't my type of girls. I was, I was spattered, it wasn't my vibe. I wasn't into them. No, but like, a little old for you. Yeah, like,

bring me back to middle school, dog, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, bro, where the real chicks are at. You know what I'm saying? The real bad. I did peak in middle school, though. There was like the,

I was the king of middle school, dude? I just was like, I was the guy, I was finger-bang and girl. like in seventh grade. And I was disgusting. I was pimple face and fucking just

and just I was just did my thing. No inhibition. There was a thing in middle school that like if you started doing sexual acts with anybody, it kind of made you cool. Even if they weren't a track. Right. Yeah. Oh, that guy fingered a girl.

Yeah. Like the kids in band were kind of like, whoa, those kids are like blowing each other. Dude, I would. If I could, yeah. They're wild. Yeah. Honestly, dude, I would go like that Naruto route. Dude, I ran on those fucking.

If you wore like a like a, like a furtale to school, you 100% did anal at 50s. Bro, yeah, you were definitely fucking the like the cat girl. Crazy shit. Yeah, 100%. Y'all were in band together. She played flute. You played the fucking obo. If you wear beanies and fucking pop of, a monster before school, you were.

Yes. And you had like fingerless gloves and little stripes on it. Yeah, dude, you were fucking, you had a GF and you moved on to the next anime. And they would be like, yeah. I remember those kids would be like the ones who would, like, viciously make out in the middle of the Oh yeah A lip ring wearing a kid

Yeah What the fuck? This is disgusting I'm like Part of me was like gross Another part of me was like Brother I love Yeah yeah yeah yeah I remember being like dude I've never felt that better

I didn't I wish I wish my crush would do Would feel half that In their mind I mean they're emotionally unstable people So that is the strongest love there is Oh yeah Oh yeah

It's like they cut themselves Before school It's contrast It's like My dad Abuse me, but you're not my dad, so I'm in love with it. It's like a weird thing.

Yeah, it's tough. They're, like, cutting themselves and being like, I bleed for you. Like, because tonight'll be the night. Yeah, they're looking in the mirror, like, bleeding, like, crying mascara. And they're like, Bethany. Bethany! My little kitten.

And now those fucking... Wait, real quick, you be sure it's plugged in? I think it is. All right, we're good. Did I miss everything? Run it back. So it's good to be here It's good to be here the big apple bro

Dude this city is fucking It's for the first time being here It's like it's cool It's like it's wild Like you know You're like the same sort of thing We're like the closest we came to culture Is like

Do you want to flats It's wild Like every girl I've seen pretty much so far That's open her mouth is French so far Yeah there's a lot of French babes Yeah A lot But she put you be bad.

Really? Why are you doing the Japanese accent again? I'm not doing Japanese, you're my friend, Jay. Ooh, I'm, I'm good for me. Are you saying? Tokyo. Yeah, like any kind of accent for some reason.

Yeah, you think it's disgusting and they should learn the language. Exactly. You think you should get out of our fucking country. Really, that's well. Because when I hear, like, if I watch porn and the girl's foreign accent, she sometimes sounds retarded just because you're brain attaches like bro.

That's you, dude. It is, but it's like... Yeah, you're here. She's like, oh, hello. This is Russian porn. You're like, look at this fucking idiot. Yeah, I mean, that's how I feel. Look at this dumb bitch.

I don't speak English. I mean... God damn, Mike. I don't fully believe that, but there's a part of my brain that, like, just I don't know why it attaches that. Yeah. Because clearly there's, I mean, it's not hard to be smarter than me. So most people in most countries are.

smarter than me. Yeah. But it's one of those Yeah, I would say. I am insanely stupid. Oh, okay. Well, maybe you're just not like well read. Because you don't seem like a dumb, you're not a slow person. Right. I'm just, I'm, I'm, I'm uneducated. I'm uneducated. You don't even

know the word. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm, I don't know things. And you have a college degree too, right? Yeah, but from Florida State. Yeah, and what? Creative writing. Oh, me too. What's up? Hell yeah, bro.

Yeah, yeah. Wow. What are you doing now? Are you working? Yeah, but I'm doing data entry for a company. Why did you? I was like, you could be a teacher here. I don't want to be a teacher.

See, I'm so... The teacher seems fucking miserable. This sounds horrible. I never want to do it. Everybody I know, like, quits it because they're like, yeah, it's terrible. These kids are a nightmare. Kids are a nightmare and also, like, everyone, like... You want to deal those goth kids making out in the hall?

They're like, tell us not to fuck in the hallway. They're literally having, like, rabbit sex. There's just tails and fur going in the air, dude. They're like, there's his in. There's hissing. Yeah, she literally purrs. She's purring.

We had one guy by high school, but he wasn't like a goth, but he was my favorite kind of guy because he would wear a elf hat. Nice. And like a Naruto van around it. And I remember one time a teacher told him that took it off, and he was like, go for. fuckers. He was so, he was like,

this is who I fucking am. Don't you're like, I will never. Yeah. Yeah, well, I also never realized like those type of, like their parents

were probably beating the shit out of each other when they get home. Oh, that's a thousand percent. Yeah, no, they had fucked up lives. Yeah, I just didn't. Those are like the nerds.

They're dorks, they're massive dorks, but they're not good at school. Oh, yeah, yeah, I was talking to somebody about that, that is the worst. That is so shitty. That's the greatest sect

of the human population. Oh my God, that's so, they're like, I love Pokemon. I love Yu-Gi-O. I like, you know, stupid sci-fi shit. But, you know, give me an English essay, and I don't know what the fuck is going on.

I love those kids. They, like, Healy around. I never even, yeah. They just watch anime and don't do their homework. He was such a crazy. It's such a crazy group of people. I would be curious, and those are, like, school shooter types. Like, that is part of it.

Yeah, kind of. I think, yeah, sort of. I would want to see the grade point averages of school shooters. Yeah. School shooters. Yeah. What if they're all geniuses? Like, fuck, this kid was going to Stanford.

Yeah. Well, this is what I was thinking about the other day. You know how there's a whole simulation theory? Sure. Like, this is all a simulation? What if, like, you did atrocities, and then you, like, you know, like a murder-suicide at, like, in high school? And then you took the goggles off. And they're like, yeah, that was all meaningless.

You're fine. And there was actually no consequences to any of that because all of this was a video game. I still think there'd be consequences. I still think by default there are. Because, like, the people you murdered, you know, they experienced. terror. But then you take the goggles off, though, and you're like, that was just a really...

Yeah, but also, like, if you got into a car accident and nothing was hurt, it's still traumatic to go through a car accident. To an extent, but to be fair, we have horrifying dreams a lot of the times, and then our brain can separate that from reality, so you can distance yourself in a way and say, oh, I'm not going to see these consequences. I don't know, dude, I don't know, just to fire back at you.

Yeah, I think... What I'm saying is, there's no consequences to shooting up by. I mean, they're just crisis actors. Yeah. This is not a... In short, yeah. David Hogg is a hologram.

Like, I had horrible dreams. For a while, I started taking antidepressants. Yeah, they made your dreams bad? They made my dreams extremely vivid. Oh, yeah. So, and I'd have, like... Well, because your serotonin's probably higher or something.

I have no idea. Yeah. But it made my dreams insane. Yeah. And it was like, they were real and they were horrifying. Yeah. And I'd wake up like,

Oh! Yeah. And then I'd go back to sleep and have like the same dream again. And I did that nine times. It'd be none. I'm exaggerated. I'm sorry. That's terrifying.

It was horrible. And then I go to the psychiatrist and she's like, oh, you should start taking this sedative for that you sleep deeply and don't have dreams. And I'm like, what are we doing right now? Yeah. I'm like, you just fucking pokes me with a needle and then put a band-aid. Like, it's like, fuck this. I'm not doing on this treadmill. I'm not taking anything fucking else.

That's where I am. You fucking freaks. I don't take anti-depressants, but the sedatives. And tell you what, I haven't had a nightmare in years. I probably have a drug problem I'm a little bit of like a fruit loop when it comes to that shit But like

What's that mean? Like all right So I think the dreaming world Like you're Because I have like six past lives I got a palm reading And that's what they told me Yeah

Do you remember what six The six were? I don't She didn't go to detail Yeah But I'm saying I don't know I don't know

I don't know But I feel like when you Like There I don't know Where your soul is drifting off to At that point and whatever I was happening

but I just feel like one of your past lives was just going through a trauma and they were bringing you into it. I don't, bro. I would show fuck with people and tell people that they were like the Unabar and a fast like

because there's people would just believe you'd be like, look, you've made up for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're in a better place now. But you were also, Martin Luther King Jr., though. Yeah, yeah.

You were Martin Luther King and Hitler. Yeah, yeah. At the same time. Was there any overlap? Yeah, there had to be there. Yeah, that's interesting. I mean, he died in the 60s. Yeah.

and he was around in the late 40s. Interesting. Yeah, you never hear his take on Hitler. I mean, I assume it was not. I thought he was cool. He still hated Jews. He had all his takes, but he hated Jews. There were certain things like that.

I think Albert Einstein was, like, racist towards Chinese people or something. Really, Einstein hated the Chinese. When did Einstein ever run into the Chinese? He's a math guy. Oh. You know what? As soon as I said it. Probably at the rocket meetings.

But that's... They're probably just way better at him. And they're like, yeah, relativity, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was it 1846? Yeah, yeah. We were back on. This will be a two-parter.

We had to cut out the whole episode because Tony went on to the race. I'm a clown. Look at me. Hey, look at me. I'm Joe Biden. Look at me. How about them gas prices?

I don't got you good. He's like, hi. That'd be great if he did do it on purpose, if you raised gas prices. Yeah, just so, just to... He's like, let's raise him, man. Gas prices are too low, man. That is the funny part because, like, look, I think he probably is, you know, he's an old guy. I might not know what's going on, but it's funny that people that are like, you know Biden's evil, right?

And he's, I was like, I don't think he's plotting anything evil. He's probably a good guy. No, I think he did do evil things. Like what? I think everyone who's in political power. I mean, he passed a pretty horrific crime bill back in the other. Oh, yeah. That's fair of fact.

Yeah. That was pretty sure, like, harsh on drug offenders and, like, something like that. Good. Good. If you're in a position of political power, your morals have been compromised. There's no way. Yeah, there's no way. You're not fucked.

I mean, even if it's, like, his morals are compromised. It's like, I don't even think his morals are, I don't know. If he had any to begin with. They're all slithering snakes, dude. They're all... Camala Harris? The reptiles. More like Camila Harris.

You know, chameleon, you know? Nice, bro. Joe Biden, more like Joe... Bionicle, then... You guys are damn bionical. He's a fucking cyborg. I'm telling you, man, Joe Biden's a bionicle.

Trump? Trump, more like, Lord, savor, Jesus Christ. I don't know. I think. Joe Biden's a bionicle. I put him together in the

third grade but I swear to fucking Christ I got a a bonoical for Christmas one year. That was a damn president of the United States.

That was a little bit. That was one of the funniest articles I ever read was like it was about a man who's in a wheelchair and he,

like a Stephen Hawking situation where it's like intensely robotic. Yeah. And it says this is the most advanced cyborg of our generation.

Are that somebody to call him like a cyborg? Picture of Stephen Hawking. Yeah, I'd be like, Cyborg. And you're like, this is the future of robotics. Yeah. I want to die. Please kill me. They're taking over. That bitch is far to Team 10, dog. He's like, my bones hurt.

They're like, whoa. Welcome to the king, too. He died, right? He's passed. He's gone. Yeah. He went to the other side, dude. Went to the black hole. Yeah. Send me through a black hole. Well, he's going to go to hell because of the scientific views.

Oh, you're right, you're right, you're right. He didn't believe in Jesus Christ. Yeah, yeah. That's why he's in that chair. Yeah. It's because he didn't have God in God. If he believed in God, he would not have looked like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

He would have been like, you and me, normal. Yeah, yeah, safe, strong. People swear by those religious stories, they're like, I swear to God, this guy was paralyzed, and then he prayed really hard. Yeah, yeah. That's what killed Bob Marley. Oh, the Rastafarianism?

Yeah, because they don't believe in, like, certain medical proceedings. or something. Yeah. And he was like, I'm just gonna pray away my cancer instead of like,

I think he had a very treatable cancer. Yeah, we had like skin cancer right? Yeah, like skin cancer on his foot or something. Oh my God. Come on, Bob.

Come on, Bob. What the fuck is it? He said, I didn't really. Don't worry. Every little ting. Every little ting. You're gonna be out of rice.

Whoa. I'm dead. That's got to be the shittiest moment to realize the prayer did not work when you're just like on your fucking yeah. Dude, I know,

Oh, shit. I'm there. Dude, I knew a family like that. They were Christian scientists, and then their grandma died. And then they were like, well, I guess this isn't real. And just like, left. Really? That got them?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's crazy. What's Christian scientists? So it's a form of Christianity. Tony's like, whoa, whoa. I smell a new religion. What is it, though? I don't really know.

So it's a form of Christianity. By the way, I was raised somewhat in it. But, like, the outskirts of it where they're like mind over matter, but sometimes they go, the extremists are like that means we shouldn't take medicine at all. Yeah, yeah. Oh, wow. Because it's like Jesus will get you through it.

Yeah. I guess I don't have health insurance. I guess I'm a Christian. That's what I do now, bro. That rules. What the fuck? You're like, the co-pays, what? Hallelujah, Jesus Christ. I'm going to get a Bible.

$4 at Barnes. normal. What is hilarious, because it was started at a time when medicine was so shitty. Like, they were like,

it was sort of like, it was like, I think this is like bullshit. Yeah, they, I'm, I'm getting, I'm covered in leeches.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, just gonna go pray. Hope is a powerful thing. Yeah, that, I mean,

that's true too. It's like, if you have, if you're in good spirits, probably helps you a lot. Yeah, like, if you have a positive mental attitude,

do they do you get yourself down. Yeah. That's what fucks you work. Just a doctor who's like, mind over mad. He's like, it's all mental. It's a mind game.

They're like amputating his foot. He's like, no. Yeah, dude. He just needs the ganja and... He'll be all right. Yeah, yeah. John, Gangea, dude. Yeah.

The Holy Trinity. The Holy Trinity. Do you have a medical card in Florida? No. Why not? I think it's easy to get, right? It's expensive. Yeah, it is expensive.

Oh, really? It's way more expensive than just... That was the funniest. I thought that I was paying $2 a month for Adderall, And I was like, yeah, this is fucking nothing. And then I realized, I'm like, wait, no, the therapist is getting paid $150. So in theory, you're paying like $150 for Adderals. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, if you do it, yeah, well, the psychiatrist, you need to see once a month for Adderall? Yeah, well, I don't feel my Adderall anymore because I just don't take it. Yeah, there you're prescribed, like, other controls. So the whole thing is the therapist talks about your feeling, and then the psychiatrist is just your drug dealer, really? Yeah, my favorite is. I used to go to the psychiatrist in high school. His name is Dr. Q. I don't, this isn't an Indian accent.

I don't know what his voice, but do you talk about you said? I'm Dr. Q. And you go, no suicidal thoughts, no depression, no. He didn't say, do you have suicidal thoughts or depression? He goes, no, never thought about killing yourself, never had this. Like, I was like, no, you're supposed to be asking me, not like saying. Yeah. Oh. Well, I guess that was his way of asking you, though.

Like, no, or was he kind of leaning in? Like, no, no, no, this, right? He was just checking off. Yeah. I was 99% of people. Oh, yeah, yeah. Wait, so if you go to the psychiatrist, will they find something wrong with you and prescribe you to something? Yeah, yeah, it's a whole point.

Yeah. They go, why are you in here? You know, and then they go through a huge checklist. They're like, have you ever seen, you know, have you ever hallucinated audio or visualizations? And I'm like, no. And then you're like, thoughts of self-harm. I'm like, no. Yeah.

You know. You just lie to them. Yeah. Yeah, there's a dragon telling me to cut myself. But I ain't mentioned. I'm trying to get some fucking zanings. I'm not going to tell them that. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm here for flight anxiety. Yeah. Yeah. No, they'll give you like. Bro, I think I could have definitely gotten Xanax. I could have definitely gotten... They do the gabapen. I prescribe colanopin, which is just...

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, any kind of benzodiazepine, I definitely could have gotten on. Give my benzos. Bezos. It is so funny because there's nothing... I think I was Joe Bez before, but like, there's nothing puscier than taking anxiety. But it's like a rap thing. It's like, man, I'm so fucking nervous.

Yeah, my anxiety shit, bro. Damn, that's funny for like what, like rap is, you know, like, you know, like, oh, the haters out here trying to stop me. Like, for comedians. Like, you know, my anxiety's like through the roof. Yeah. Like, that's the one. Just a little nirite.

Yeah. Yeah. Like, before I started comedy, I never would have ever said I had anxiety or even thought about anxiety, but I'm a very anxious person. Yeah. I'm a sensitive man. You remember that? That's my favorite.

When Christoph, you got heckled by that guy who said he'd kill people before. And you're making fun of the town's local militia. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And this guy goes, he goes, you ever. killed a man before and you were like, no.

I think the guy was like, I have or something like that. And then you're like, you said something like along the lines of like, if you killed somebody I assume you wouldn't be so sensitive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the guy goes, I'm a very sensitive man. I forgot about that.

Holy shit. Yeah, he goes, oh, I'm sitting. He started choking up about, he was like, about time in the military. Where? He was just like a drunk. He was just like bloodline drunk flying the flag vet, you know what I mean? Blues and bruise. Yeah, blues and bruise. He was just like,

I just like, I just, I was just like, okay, dude, you're just like sentimental drunk right now, and I made fun of the militia. Like the good old boys who like fire their guns in the woods. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is not the armed forces. Yeah, yeah. I think he was just drunk and thought I was shitting on, like, the Marines or something.

Yeah, yeah. I don't think he really understood. Like, I would never just unprovoked go on stage and be like, aren't Marines a bunch of fucking dorks? Yeah. Like, why? But I'm saying there's literally a, like, skull and crossbones, like, the blue boys

I'm like, what is this? This is fucking dumb, isn't it? Who are these fucking losers? And then he's like, those are heroes. And I'm like, where? We're in St. Cloud Florida. And there were dudes from the militia, they were laughing at you shitting on it.

Oh, yeah, there's another guy. Oh, there was an actual militia in the crowd? Yeah, yeah, there was like a militia dude, but it's like, there's also like, there's like hobbyist militias, and then there's like all right weirdo militias. You know, that are actually... What are hobbyists? Malicious.

Like, hobbyist militias are just like gun nuts who like to hang out and pretend they're in a little gay army. Yeah, yeah. Whereas, like, I feel like there's real like plotting January 6 militias. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, there's a difference. Yeah. You know, there's, like, fun, kind of like almost like Elk Lodge militias. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there's like, no, I'm like, they look like you, Tony. Yeah.

And they just love America and think. Guys that look like, you know who looks like Snyde. Preparing for the Obama apocalypse, yeah. You know who looks like one of those guys? Who's the, he's a Democrat, the new governor of Pennsylvania, I think.

Oh, yeah, he's awesome, dude. He's great because he looks. Oh, Fetterman. He looks so concerned. Like, he looks like, like, he looks like a clan member. Yeah, yeah. But he's not.

I know, he's a gigantic, kind of overish white guy. Oh, got a stroke. I like how hard all of us are vaping, right? Yeah. I just did this. I just, I just, I just, I'm like,

but he looks like he had a stroke like I've heard nothing he says politically but I'm like I like this guy I just I like the way he looked I know he's a liberal I don't really know anything Well that's the thing with guys that like look like me Or like you it's like you

You can't just go Oh he's a Republican because he looks like that But like they could be so Joe exotic But if you see a girl with like pink hair And you know Septim piercing things you know You know where they vote right You know the difference though

The coolest I saw an audience member the other night And I looked at a girl and she looked like an only fan's girl. I'm like, that's a good level because I'm like, I'm sure she's not super conservative, but I'm sure she's not far. There's a weird thing because she had pink hair. She's a centrist.

Yeah, yeah, well, I would say that, but she had pink hair, but she also had, like, long nails and, like, big fake tits. And I'm like, I bet you you're not too political. I bet you you're kind of like. She's all about tits. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She's like, look, when it comes to... She's like, I'm not a political titty-pick. I'm not a political porn star. That is a thing on, Twitter, you ever see that? Yeah, yeah. I've talked about... There's tons of political porn star Twitters.

Yeah, it's like you'll... It's so frustrating because you're watching like a girl get fucked and then the next thing is like a picture of like... A Syrian refugee. Yeah, and you're like, this is... Yeah, so hard to... Wait, but they're not in the same... That's not the same account. Yes, it is the same account.

They're like, retweet. They're like... They're like, I'm using my platform. And then the next one is like, oh, look at my fat jokes. Whoa, wow. Damn. I don't scroll too much on Twitter. I just fucking pose dumb shit.

Yeah, it's good, dude. I saw my favorite I saw a girl she was posting she goes If you show me your political ballot Who you voted for I'll send you nudes That was like her Instagram story Yeah And I was like how many guys do you think are just like voting Trump

And then just screenshoting like picture of Biden Vote Yeah yeah there you go Wow well that's a good way Yeah that was a one That was like an Australian woman or something right That was oh no I knew a girl doing this There was some donation oh no there was a donation thing to like

The Australian Fire thing She was like an Australian old fans. Oh, yeah. Or something. Or just an Australian, like, hot lady who's like, I'll send you pictures of my tities if you give $10 to the Australian. Collected a shit ton of money. Yeah, that makes a hundred grand or something. Wow.

Also, I don't know who. That's good because that's not political. Nobody's going to be like, fuck. Yeah. I'm on the fires. I grow fire. I root for the fire. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That'd be sick.

Especially, like, Australia, because it's like, I feel like the fire is burning. I don't know why. I don't know anything about California. But in my head, I'm like. What is it? But Australia, I'm like, we can't lose our koala bears. The six are cute as hell, dude. Yeah.

The wall's going to suck, though. Looky. Have you heard them yell? No. They have different yells. So some of them are like, ah, ah, ah. But then some of them were like, rea. Like, they have all different.

That was the mascot of my elementary school. The koala? The koala bears. Aw. Look, kind of a koala bears. I know, it was really cute. I was a dolphin. You were a dolphin?

Yeah. Remember the, like the Dave Chappelle Dolphin? We were the Eagles, but our school initials, Park, Maitland School, they didn't even call it elementary. They called it PMS. So we literally had shirts that said PMS on them. I thought it was so funny because it was like PMS, you guys get it? And nobody got it. And I was like, look it up, come back to me.

It's like girls. I didn't even know what PMS is. It's pre-mentral cycle. So it's like before you were starting your period where you're like, you're moody. It's their excuse to get away with being a bitch. It's a bunch of bullshit. Oh, yeah, the moon makes you a bitch. Yeah. And the sun is why I hit you with my truck.

It's a lot of sense. Dumb bitch. Yeah, I hate women. I fucking hit. Clip that. I also love how, like, I- Put it on the motherfucking real bitch. I like how I was so mad at you guys, but not maddie, but I was like, make sure your microphones are plugged it.

Meanwhile, I just like unplug the whole fucking thing. No, no, I mean. You dumb fuck. You do it again? It's good. We're fine. God damn it, Michael, dude. I'm pissed. We're fucking fine.

But you need to get a producer, dog. Yeah, you need to get someone in the booth. I know, I know. The booth? You're going to get someone on the ones and two in the booth. The ones and the two is the emcees, dog. Yeah. You know about that shit, bro?

Yeah, bro. I don't know. I know. That was a good bit we were doing last night. We went to a jazz show. We were just like hanging out at this bar. They had like live jazz. And we kept going, hey, let me freestyle on this.

Hey, you don't let me freestyle on this. I see y'all doing your little jazz thing. I want to get, I want to get some bars. I know, before I started, I just want to say I'm a cryptocurrency investor. I'm actually not a person. I'm a cryptocurrency. You know what I'm saying?

I'm working out. I'll turn my dick into it. NFT right now. You know what I'm saying? So if anybody got like their wallet, their Bitcoin wallet, compare profiles and monkey pictures.

A real talk. Shout out to everybody in Ukraine. We kept doing like, let's just do 10 minutes of shout out. I'm actually a real estate agent. You know, I can get you hooked up. I do everything I sell

I'm an entrepreneur math books whatever you need I got candy bars for sale right now I got skittles in my pocket I sell you one skittles in my pocket I sell you one skittles for 25 cents bro I swear to God

bro we were doing that and we're I feel like we're doing like AKAs or something they call me whatever they call me the white night they call me young steel we did that for like 25 minutes

which I don't have you been to jazz like club around here I'm sure you have yeah so I've been to zinc and then I've been to some car called like Grey Dog or something dog. Maybe.

Yeah. It was a KGB bar. It was above New York Comedy. Yeah. I was like, I was looking around. I was like, this looks like Russian propaganda. He's like, yeah, it's a KGB bar. And I was like, yeah, it's a KGB bar.

It was just like a shock that that's like a thing, you know? Yeah, yeah. There's not like the ISIS bar, you know. That'd be awesome. How cool with an ISIS themed bar. That would be fucking bad. That would be so sick. There's like a fake thing, a fake body.

You can be a head. It's like, oh, just an American journalist like, A woman comes in a skirt, just gets rocks thrown out. You fucking whore. You throw foam rocks at the waitresses. They're like, yeah, she had. Yeah, she, yeah, she, yeah, she, yeah, she, yeah, she was, yeah, she walked too far in front of her husband. So we got to throw rocks at her now.

Why did you look at that other man? What the fuck is wrong? wrong with you. I saw your eyes. Bitch. No modesty. One of my favorite bars is there's a Vietnam War themed bar. Whoa.

It's called Saigon Blonde. It's in St. Pete. Oh, it's in St. Pete. Yeah, but it's so funny because it's like playing like cool techno and you're like, what's the theme of this place? And then you just see like war medals on your wall?

It's freaky. Yeah. The wrong guy's gonna walk in a PTD. Yeah. Just freak out. J. PTD. PT motherfucker motherfucker motherfucker motherfucker

Mothothotho. Yeah. Some guy's gonna we're wheelchair, just fucking Lieutenant Dan in there. What's the bar called? Saigon Blonde. It's my favorite. I really like the place. It's very cool. Yeah. That reminds you a fucking... What were we talking about? I forgot I was talking about this with, but it was a

fucking, what's that movie? Saving Private Ryan. Yeah, yeah. Like, what's his name? Like, Spielberg had like a private screening with a bunch of World War II vets. And they were just like, I hate it. What is fucking asshole? Ha! Takes me back. Yeah, it's like, what are you making these guys

relived in? Yeah, dude, I'm not like, I'm behind on great movies, and I had saw that maybe like six months ago, and I was like, wow, it's very graphic. Yeah, it's intense, dude. They said that they nail the down to the T and I was like, holy shit.

Yeah, it's fucking brutal. Well, that was the funny thing is, I read something about, like, one of the Call of Duty games. So, like, we interviewed real Iraq. for veterans to make sure it's accurate, which is so funny to be like a guy sitting there, and he's like, it was terrible, it was like horrible.

And he's like, yeah, what it looked like when you shot a guy in the face? Like, he's just trying to like nail the graphics. He's like, is this what it looks like when you shoot a man? When you strike a man down? Yeah. He doesn't even answer. He just starts crying. Yeah, we nailed it. We got it. So many bodies.

Dude, like, my buddy, he was over in, like, Kabul and, like, was part of, like, his infantry was, like, he was, like, really in the shit. Yeah. And he was, like, going into, like, graphic detail about it. And, like, he had, he got PTSD. And then, like, he told me about it. And I was, like, I didn't realize it was that fucking bad. And, like, the shit he was saying to me. I didn't realize war was that horrible. I just, he was sending, like, snaps to us, like, kind of during it. So, like, I didn't. But then he, now he comes back. He used to not smoke weed. And now he does because he needs it. And he, like, crazy anxiety. And he'd never used to be like that. And I'm like, fuck, dude. Fuck, dude. I knew a guy. He was, he was so pro. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so. He was so military, now he's like, he's so against military, he's like, fuck them. Like, they dragged me out in that bullshit

and I'm like, yeah. Yeah, that it's always funny when you talk to me his pro-mints where he's like, I hated what we did over there. I think it was terrible. And then like, some like, 17-year-old's like, never fucking kneel for the flag. And you're like, this guy was in it. It was like... J-R-R-T-C is going hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. ROTC kids are fucking... Oh, they're wild. I was also like, these are the kids

we should not be giving guns. Bro, that's what I'm saying? The RTCC kids were the ones who were the ones who are most likely to be school shooters. You know what I'm saying? Oh, 1,000% Now they have training. They're in the field. He's a guy flinch and just like shoot a kid in the face.

They tried to stop the school shoes, but they are. They're arming the trench coat kids. Yeah. Yeah, someone called it, I think on Twitter, called it weaponized autism. That's exactly what it is. Bro, back to high school, dog. Speaking of, we were talking about this.

Who was, who was like your, who was your high school, um, uh, the retard, you know? We had retarded kids. What are you talking about? But who was the one? Who was the king?

Who was the prom king of the ones? Okay. I feel like there's always one where you're like That's the most popular one. Yeah, we had a kid He wear headphones He's a guy with Down syndrome. I forgot his name.

Maybe like Luke or something like that But there's somebody because the girls Who tried to sit with him And he'd be like, get away from me, bitches Like he would like call the shit Yeah, yeah That's amazing. Yeah, yeah, he'd be like

Fuck away from me Yeah, he was just trying to like do his thing to eat his lunche He looks away from his pizza like, What are you sluts, dude? Yeah. I'm eating pizza. I'm trying to eat my dinosaur chicken fingers.

You're interrupting me. I'm trying to do my coloring book. Can't you seem a little busy? Don't have time for you, sluts. We had one kid. There was two kids that definitely had, like, I don't know what it was specifically, but they got in, like, a fight.

And it was funny because, like, they were doing really strategic moves. Like, but things you wouldn't do if you're trying to look cool in a fight. So, like, Wendy was, like, jumping on the other. head. Whoa. Yeah.

And I was like, I was like, that's not cool, but it's effective. That's crazy. I think somebody literally had to do with like a calculator

or something like that. Donkey Kong, bro. Yeah, bro. Yeah, bro. Yeah, bro. No rules. No rules in these.

Man fucking street. They're fucking biting you. Yeah, there's no cuth. Yeah. And apparently like, because my friend's mom like worked like at our school

with like the, you know, disabled kids and she would come home. I think he caught him retards like three times. And now you're like, the special preventally. They've been touched by God, children of God.

These little angels. And she would come home and have like war stories. You're like, one, like, ripped my bra off and, like, punched me in the face. And it scratched me. And I was just like, once I get a hold of you, dude, there's no fucking. I don't know if it's specific to autism, but there would be autistic kids at the school. And when they're fucking not happy, dude, it's something. And they're grown.

Because the odds and her kids seem more happy. You know what? 100%. I learned this recently, too. I like maybe about a year ago, I learned that I used to think that autism and Down syndrome were the same thing. Very different. Very different. Very different. Yeah. Autism can be coupled with other mental disabilities, but like, yeah. Autism doesn't mean that you're unattended. Yeah, like, Michael has autism. Yeah, yeah. Look at me. I'm sorry. You're doing amazing. No, dude, now it's a thing.

I remember I went on a date with a girl and I was joking with her. I was like, I have autism. She was like, really? Yeah, I know. You could. Like, and she was like, almost, she was like more like attracted

to the fact that I had, like, was pretending that I was. She's like, are you building rockets? You're like, you have 12 green beans. Yeah. That'd be awesome, dude. There's 700 grand of rice. You're just making shit up.

Yeah, I haven't looked you in the eye once. Yeah. My buddy works with this guy He has Down syndrome though And he says the guy's like 25 But he works at a school So the guy's in school And he's like, what did you do this weekend?

He always goes, Drink beer Just every week is it Because like yeah He can't Yeah Yeah So he's like a thriving

I don't know He's driving Driving and driving And driving and driving He's pulled over Yeah dude He's doing all kinds Bro there's no like

I've never seen like a street down syndrome though You know like a guy who's got like The hood down syndrome Yeah I've seen that You know They don't care about appearance. So none of them is going to try to look cool. Yeah, I've seen some swagged out-down syndrome people on.

Like a Supreme? Yeah, on TikTok. There's one for like a chin-strap beard. And he has, he's got like the glow filter on. He'll have like Playboy Cardi in the background. Is he throwing a gang signer? Yeah, he's throwing gang signs. I showed you that.

That video is awesome. What I said you? Oh, my guy. I showed him. The guy's the bowling alley. Wait, what? The one I showed you. with the boys of the bullying alley

Dude, they're just getting down. Like, there's some, like, dope rap song playing. Yeah. And there's this, dude, he's wearing, like, a John Cena belt and, like, a sideways hat. And he's just, like, fucking dancing. They just have, like, the time of their lives. No, I love that shit, dude.

My TikTok is very down syndrome-heavy. Yeah. It knows that I think that they're fun to watch. Yeah, yeah. Like, there's a guy who's always cooking ribs. Oh, hell, yeah. I love this guy. He's like, we're making ribs.

And he's like, let's go. Like, yeah, dude. I'm so happy about ribs. It gets you out of life because they're excited. He's smoking a brisket, dude. He's like, this is the greatest day at my life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I wish I could be a quarter as happy.

Yeah. And this guy is when he looks at a freshly made brisket, dude. It sucks that they can't do comedy because, like, the people would just, like, we'd be laughing with you, but they'd be in the way. Yeah, I mean, I'd love to ghost right. I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, dude, that'd be amazing. It's like, I think that's fucked up. It's like, that's kind of, like, in a way, you know, excluding that group.

I've seen him in movies and on TV. Yeah. like that movie Peanut Butter Falcon. Yeah, yeah. You see that movie? Yeah, yeah, I liked it. It was not bad. But they can only play.

They can't play somebody without it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's also like... That'd be awesome if he was just like, he's just the school principal. They don't even acknowledge it. It's a completely normal character. That'd be amazing, dude.

Well, that was, that was a... I don't know, who cares? I'm talking about the same shit I always talked about here. But a couple weeks ago... When your girlfriend walks in, who gave you that critique two seconds. Yeah, but it's like, there's this one where it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a,

video for how you shouldn't treat people differently. Yeah. And there's a guy on airplane sitting next to a guy with Down syndrome and he's like, oh, like, I gotta be sat next to this guy. And the guy in the airplane's reading a book about like advanced physics. And the guy with Down syndrome's like, what's you mean? Yeah. And he's like, oh, you don't want to get it.

Like, you don't understand it. And then like, the guy with Down syndrome ends up getting moved. Yeah. And he's like, the book gets better in the next chapter. He's like, how would you know? And in the back covers, the guy was the guy with Down syndrome. He goes, oh my God, you're doctor would ever say it? He's like,

mm-hmm What? That is not real That's a sketch No, it's a PSA That is not real Yes, yes Send that to me

Because that can't be real No, it's insane And imagine like The guy writing that In earnest Yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah And then the Down syndrome guy

is actually a physicist Yeah, it's like No, he's not Jokes on you, buddy Yeah, It turns out They actually are really good of physics

And nothing else Yeah, And you're like, what? Yeah, it's so, it's so many too because all the comments on Facebook are like, so true. I show everybody I know. Yeah, my college chemistry professor

was head down syndrome. No, no, no, no, no, he didn't. Never happened. Yeah, yeah. That's dumb as it. That can't be. I gotta watch it. It's so funny because it's like, it's like,

it's not even a mean thing. It's like, that's like saying a blind guy, like it's like, it's not their skill. They have other skills, but it's like, they're plenty capable of doing a million other things. Yeah, yeah, but then you're focusing in the thing they suck at and you're like, actually, well, they're good at this.

Yeah, yeah, no, they're not. It's fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's like a short guy. It's like, oh, wait, you're Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, no, you're not. It's okay.

He's really short. He's four feet tall. Yeah, yeah. Doesn't play in the NBA. Yeah, and that's fine. Yeah. I don't play in the NBA either. I couldn't write a physics book either.

Yeah, yeah. I'm dumber than everybody. Yeah, what was the coolest going to your school, though, you were going to say? Hope. That was her name, Hope. Oh, hell, yeah. That's amazing, dude. And she would flirt with everyone, and she was a little slut on the...

I'm pretty sure she's like. some dudes off. No. Oh, just kidding. Like, oh my God. That would be that. Tony's about to brag about something. She is the way that's not cool.

She would sexually harass people like... Just grab their dicks. What if she was like such a bro? Who's going to believe you? Who? What? What? She just...

She just sits in your... See? Girls are good... What if she was like? She just talk normal. She goes up to. What's up? I got to grab your

comment It's like that one Just like It just like It just runs away What are you doing Captain Captain Doofy

From a scary movie Oh yeah Yeah It's like one of those things Yeah But Is that a bit For Captain Doofy

He's like He's like Hey I'm perfectly normal And then goes away No That scary movie He's a serial killer He's the serial killer

Oh I didn't know that He's scream He's the guy in the mat You just spoiled Scary Movie 2 I've never seen scary movie Oh that's the first one Whatever

It's a It's a hood classic, man. That's a holly classic. I wanted to be him for Halloween because he's not technically disabled. But that's the thing is like, people go to force scump every single year. And technically you are...

Yeah, but that's like, you know... No, he won a ping pong tournament. It's the, it's the tropical tournament. That's another thing. Yeah, but at the same time, it's like he, on paperwork, they literally... They're like, he's retarded. He's an 85 IQ.

Yeah, but now him, like, he doesn't look like he has downscism. Because he doesn't. He doesn't. There's different forms of mental. He's just kind of dumb. They don't really articulate what... Okay, all right.

what thing he has. But he probably would have a thing to have the IQ that low. Because he's just a dumb guy. Or he just got hit in the head. Yeah. That's why I've never, I've talked about this boy.

I've never taken an IQ test and I refuse to. I wonder how it. Like my friends were like doing someone that was like a Menta exam and they like sent it to me. And like it was these puzzles that were fucking hard. Yeah. So hard.

And I, this test is racist. I. Yeah. For me, a black man. Yeah. And I got, like, so it gets progressively more difficult. And there's like 20 or 25 questions.

And I got through like 10. And I was like, okay, this is like taking me a little while. It's kind of a challenge. And then they, at a certain point, they got too hard. And I just like was like, I'm not doing this. Yeah, yeah. I'm, this is too hard of thinking for me. I just don't want to.

That means you have a zero. Who invented? And then I skipped through it, though. Like, what's the idea? Sorry. I don't know. What's the idea of IQ? Like, well, like, how are they judging someone's IQ?

You know, is it all mathematical? Is it how quickly you can solve an equation? I took one in elementary school and it was like a diverse set of questions. Because I know there's people who are like, like, I feel like I, sometimes that could be, like, I read too much into like someone's emotions, but I feel like I can read someone's emotions really well where some people are really bad at that. And then, you know, some people are great at math. Yeah, there's like the idea of multiple. I do you mean to catch you off. I'll just say there's an idea of multiple intelligences.

Yeah. But what IQ is is an attempt to make like a general, a general eyes intelligence. Yeah. Right. I guess would you say like a philosopher, though? Like, does that add? Is there any sort of philosophy involved? Is that where you're trying to nail it?

I'm a philosopher. That's what I'm trying to say. Well, no, it's generally like pattern recognition and like word association was on there. So it would be like, it'd be like a stick square, stick square. Stick circle. What's the next thing? circle and so it would be like that kind of shit and then it'd be like a painter

is to brush as you know as like Jew is to Kanye or yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so it'd be like okay well what's the guy carpenter is to blank hammer you know whatever something like that so like yeah shows you how well you associate words and recognize

patterns was like what I remember most I like you were saying reading emotions I love the idea it's like this is your girlfriend is she mad at you or not right this seems like Really? Which sometimes it could be like a, you know, sometimes you can read into it too much, you know, especially for me. I read into things way too much. Yeah, I'd be too deep in my own.

I'd be too much. I'd be deep in these streets. I'd be three levels in, you know what I mean? Bro, y'all playing chess. I'm playing checkers, you know what I'm? Actually, it's the other way. Yeah. He did that on purpose, dude.

That's all part of the game. It's all part of the game, you know what? I graduated. That's also, I'm in your boat, too, where I'm like, you know what? I think I'm just a different thinker. And then I realized that I'm just stupid. Like the more that goes on, I'm like, you know, maybe I just see things differently than other people. Right, right.

And then somebody explain. I'm like, no, maybe this. And then I learn more. And I'm like, no, I'm just dumb. You just didn't know. Yeah. Sometimes it's like that, but I think you do have what, you got like ADD or something. All the ADD, OCD.

That's what I mean? You're like a neurodivergent, dude. Yeah. What does that mean? Neurodivergent? Just means you're not normal. Oh. It's your pussy, dude.

That means you see things different. You think different. I got schizophrenia, bitch. He voices in my head Tell me I'm the best People in the walls tell me I'm the shit These ghosts telling me

Go get your motherfucking bad The ghost of my mother's telling me I gotta get this bad There was There was one schizophrenic Like music producer And everybody's like He's so creative

But he just had the song It's like But he's using his mouth Then he was like He's so out of the box I was like I think anybody can really do this There is not particularly

There is shit like that though Sometimes someone's like You ever see, like, Daniel Johnson? No, who's this? He's like a super, he was like a super schizophrenic guy back in the day, but he wrote, he wrote these, like, beautiful love songs that he, like, record on, like, an answering machine. It was like, it's crazy, though. But then you talk to him and you see, like, an interview with him.

He's like, the devil is listening. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Jesus. He was on, he tried to crash a plane once. What? He, him and his dad were, like, in a plane, and they, I think he did crash it or he tried to crash it, because he was convinced that, like, he's, he, the, he, the, he, the, he, the, he, the, he, the, he, the, like God was telling him to do it or something.

Yeah. It was like some crazy shit. It sucks. But now he's all good. He's medicated. Oh, yeah. But he can,

there's a big difference. Oh, he's an artist? Yeah, he's great. I guess it is doable, yeah. But it's hard.

It's like, if you're gonna like, you know what I mean, you're like attacking your family members and you have to like, things get in the way. I think what I, one time,

he went to, he went to some concert and he took too much acid. And he was like, he was like, a little, like, funky before.

He was always a little offbeat or something like that. Oh, so he developed schizophrenia. I think it got way worse when he started getting into psychedelic drugs. Yeah, that's not a good combo. Bro, because I was taking during, like, COVID, I was taking, like, a lot of acid. And there would be sometimes where I thought I would hear my mom screaming. Jesus. For my name.

And I'd be like, yeah? And she's like, nothing. I didn't say anything. I guess it is like, and they say it, like, the acid will drag. the schizophrenia out of you. Not that I have schizophrenia, but I... No, I've had like... A couple...

True psychosis from acid. Yeah. Yeah. No, I thought it was dead. I thought I went to hell. But like... On it or afterwards? No, on it.

Oh, yeah. On it. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. I like an acute psychotic break. I always... I was so scared.

I never been so scared in my life. I thought I was dead. I thought it was the devil. It was freaky. Oh, fuck. Yeah. It was crazy. Yeah.

It's crazy. We're running out of time then. Are we? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh, what do you guys want to promote? Fuck me then, all right. Gene Jack's podcast, dude.

Check it out. YouTube. J-E-A-N-J-A-X. Are you, uh, because he's back in Orlando, right? He's in Orlando, yeah, but we have like one recorded now. I'm going to go back in December and... Just, just crank out a bunch. Yeah, just fucking, we're going to be a little slow with it, but...

Hell yeah. 30 episodes out right now, so... Fuck, yeah. Go back. Go back in the catalog. Check it out. It is a great, yeah. Good people, good guys. Orlando family, dog.

Tony Wellens, Instagram, TikTok, Twitter. Your eyes are closed while you're a promo I looked down off I'm so ashamed of it I'm just thinking of it Tony Wells bitch found me everywhere Don't yeah Yeah if you want more racism

Yeah Oh yeah yeah yeah No that host was nice Yeah check him out on a rumble Yeah Yeah Rumples Truth social

Social Couple CUN on for Yeah daily wires Bright Bart's looking to pick them up He's popping off Stormforce Or what's it called? Is it Stormforce?

You gotta get in where you fit in. It's something. Storm. Yeah, I know where you're talking. Stormfront. See, I don't, the only one I know about is Rumble. See,

I don't even know any of these ones. I tried, by the way, I tried to hop on. They're all awesome, dude. I tried to get on Rumble because I'm like, it's a new platform.

Yeah, I was like, maybe I'll be the first to this. Even though it's all conservative, I was like, I'll put like non-political stuff on there. Yeah. And then I got put on a wait for truth social.

I'm like, fuck you guys. Yeah, yeah, no. You're not breadpilled enough. Yeah, I know, yeah. I'm like, I just want to put funny videos. Truth social? Yeah, it's called truth. It's like Trump's trying to make Twitter, too, but it's for freedom. All the good designers are at the other, like, the liberal companies is how it works. It's like those things suck.

Yeah, it's a startup. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Hell yeah, brothers. Thanks for having us, dogs. Thanks for having us, dude.