MORNING KOMBAT WITH LUKE THOMAS AND BRIAN CAMPBELL - Room Service Diaries | Music | Max Holloway | Favorite Sports Teams | SuperHeros | Morning Kombat

Episode Date: January 23, 2021

Luke Thomas and Brian Campbell are back for another episode of Room Service Diaries. Back at the bomb shelter to cover UFC 257 and Showtime Boxing the guys go tip-to-tip answering all your questions submitted through Apple Reviews. ---------------------------- 'Morning Kombat’ is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, Castbox, Google Podcasts, Bullhorn and wherever else you listen to podcasts.    For more Combat Sports coverage subscribe here: youtube.com/MorningKombat   Follow our hosts on Twitter: @BCampbellCBS, @lthomasnews, @MorningKombat    For Morning Kombat gear visit: store.sho.com   Follow our hosts on Instagram: @BrianCampbell, @lukethomasnews, @MorningKombat  To hear more from the CBS Sports Podcast Network, visit https://www.cbssports.com/podcasts/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Rise to rewards with the BMO Eclipse Rise Visa Card. Terms and conditions apply. And away we go, and away we go, and away we go, and away we go. Hi, everyone. This is Room Service Diaries, Jersey City Edition 2.0. My name is Luke Thomas. I'm joined by my trusty steed and... The hell's a steed?

I don't even fucking know. Is that like a horse? Yeah, you're like a horse. You're like a horse that is lame that needs to be put to death. All right. This is Room Service Diaries. a horse that is lame that needs to be put to death all right this is room service diary my name is brian i'm 42 and i have a hangover off two drinks thank you thank you okay let's tell them what you drank last night uh by the way if you're watching this you know what the deal is get the video thumbs up hit subscribe this is the podcast where we drink things and then say things we're going to

regret and get fired for later on in life but for right now we're not going to um when you run for office one day it was a former speech writer oh i would never run for office are you kidding you have to like fundraise and glad hand i can barely stand you you're my best friend yeah you have to rely on people and that's something that you're that you're this is some shit i don't do you have to pretend to love people that's some shit i don't like oh we were just talking earlier luke how underrated the third Rage Against the Machine album is. No one ever talks about it, right? Battle of Los Angeles. Fucking rock.

You ever seen them in concert? No. I should have gone to Rage Wu-Tang when they did the tour together. There were riots and horror for my friends. In fairness, Rage was good there, but Wu-Tang was horrendous. It's because live rap music, as we've gone to, is not a good thing. It can be okay. But no, dude, that third Rage album was a little more...

No, commercial's not the word. It was actually somewhat softer than the first two, but a little more sophisticated. That's the thing. I think it's the sophistication. Sleep now when the fire is. More produced than normal. I mean, it was...

But yeah, that Gorilla Radio, I love them. I love that album so uh that's what we're talking about but yeah back to the two bear i don't want to say the terms two bear q yeah don't because that's that's that's not where that's not the lane that i drive in yeah first of all you're straight so it's got nothing to do with being queer uh second of all you are a pussy i will say that say that. I'm a slave to history, and I respect James Buchanan. What does that mean? There are these times where you give me these stares, and then your lip quivers. You're like, which way is he going here?

Is he going to? Did he just tell that girl to suck his? Why are you turning the color of Country Time Lemonade? The jaundice is setting in. I'm basically drinking Country Time Lemonade. Is the jaundice red? What the fuck is wrong with you? Look at you.

You are a mess. Luke, I am so tired. I'm tired, too. I don't have the COVID, but I've got... Here's the thing. I've thought about this before. I am not in any way suggesting that what we do... I mean, what we do is not a pimple on the ass of people who have to get up every day

and put... Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Let me make this point. What we do... Like, if someone's like, oh, well, I put shingles on our roof. Yes, sir. You are tougher than us.

True. And you deserve a back rub and your feet rubbed and a beer at the end of the day. You have done more than we have done or the people that clean out the airplanes in between rushes oh my god it's enough but I've read about I read some Carl Sagan books he's talked about this and how certain forms of like mental

exhaustion can just drain the body and weights like for example what gets you more tired going to the gym or reading for an hour sometimes reading for an hour can actually put you especially the text is like really intense and heavy uh or like full of terms you're not aware of or this sounds so stupid okay but like it's taxing to talk on a microphone and i'm not complaining it's just but it's taxing to look into a microphone and raise your game but it's also taxing it's a hurry up and wait industry so we had hits all day today shows live hits live morning combat

cbs sports hq and there's so much where you're just like postured up and wait and ready to go and waiting you know five ten minutes and then it's talk for three minutes and then it's wait again and then today we had a 9 45 hit i thought the hit would be five minutes and they go yeah you're just gonna talk until the weigh-in start i'm like we've amped for an hour so it's it's overstimulated y'all know conor mcregor's fighting right it's gonna be a while it's overstimulation it's bad diet the last two days

but Luke it's worth it because we come here to slay for the MK brand that awesome slayer we are we're like slayer

only we respect God okay so if you want to play something play it off your phone don't play it off the computer because the computer CBS gave me a shit I'm not gonna play anything

but this microphone right here, Luke. Chickity-chick, one chick. What I would say is, I forgot what I was going to say. Yes, but we're here. So we asked you guys if you wanted a question to leave a review on Apple Podcasts and put a question in there,

which is a way that we game the system to get more positive reviews. You know, I mean, it is what we do. Yeah, I mean, as long as you... That's what I would say about Dana. Like, as long as you're honest about what you're trying to accomplish... Dana cannot...

The word honest in Dana, I mean, he just can't make it work. It's just when you're just blatantly lying, you know? And it's like, all right. Is he interested in coming back, Dana? Is he really? I don't think Habib wants to come back, bro. I've got a funny feeling about it.

I think I've seen him talking to a microphone and say there's no chance. He basically has to go, no chance. That's what you got. I mean, there's no chance in hell at this point. I remember the day after Trump got elected, so obviously it was not inaugurated. It was UFC 205. Remember that? Were you there for UFC 205 fight week?

New York City, yes. The fight week. No. So, yes. The fight week. No. So I remember we had fight week. I went to the press conference. It was the last two days. Did you go to media day? Because the beat was on the prelim card, that thing.

Or at least the bare minimum. No, I came in for the press conference day. So I'll never forget this, bro. So I went to the media day. And so that was a Wednesday because the election was on a tuesday and trump won and remember he won in the way where everyone was like oh clinton's gonna win then trump fucking won out of nowhere or you know out of nowhere whatever and then the next day dude you know new york is a very liberal city right so you could just see the long the long faces everywhere you went it was crazy and we thought trump was coming

to the arena that night too no. No, no, no. That was for Masvidal years later. No, dude, dude, listen. This is 205. Stop. Dude, I know you're brain damaged. I know you got CTE, and you got no good fights to show for it. You know what I mean?

I'm like Dana talking to a, what's his name? I got CTE, too. Listen, Spencer, I know you've been in countless fight of the night wars. Listen, you're one of the greatest trilogies in lightweight history, but come on. But, you know, I fought on the streets of Boston. But I'll never forget. So I remember Trump was talking at the time about a Muslim ban. Remember that?

In fact, he put one into effect. And he tried to build a wall between here and Muslim. I didn't care about the wall. I didn't care about the wall. I didn't care about any of that shit. So I went and I asked Khabib, and I put a microphone on his face. And, you know, he was already sucking sucking weight so he was not looking too good and i was like uh you know trump that's so luke thomas we finally got fedor for a sit down fedor what's your favorite russian you're so you're so bitter you're so bitter so stupid bro oh yeah

dude the question sucked fedor sucked can we just say that he's got covid be careful i hope he pulls through and comes out fucking looking amazing. In that interview, it was not good. So I go to Khabib and I ask him a bunch of questions. And at the end of it, I asked him, I said, Donald Trump is talking about banning Muslims in the country. What do you think about that? And he goes, I don't care.

This is the exact quote. I don't care about Donald Trump or other stuff. And I was like, other stuff? He's like, other stuff. I go, what do you mean? He goes, other stuff. He just kept repeating it. I was like, okay.

Did he say smash at all? No, no smash. No nothing. But you'll recall if you go to the post-fight interview for UFC 205 and you look at where he said his number one bullshit answer that was to my question in your fucking face I don't know if you remember Luke the night of UFC 205

when I made sure that you were included in an ESPN produced piece about growing stardom and I recommended you to Brett Okamoto who was staffing the piece and reaching out to SportsCenter and then I had to go

in the press room get you, set you up in front of the camera, thank you for your service and time not for your Marine Corps service you know what I had forgotten about this? and had to pick all your dog hair off of your suit coat for you I have many dogs

there is a soft side to my heart. It's probably the French-Canadian side, you know, when it comes to two. It's the Lithuanian side. So, Father, please come over here so we can kiss. Luke, luckily, you are not my father, but yeah. You wish. Yeah.

I would die in a kiss. Suck my kiss, yeah. All right, so we have questions to get to. Hey, you know that song? It's a great song by Prince and the New Power Generation. It's called Cream. Cream, get on top. Get on top.

And then he says, you will cop. What does he mean by cop? Does he mean you will- Cop to it? Do you mean you'll ejaculate? I always thought that's what he meant. I don't know. You ever copped?

If he means jizzed, I've jped if he means jizzed I've jizzed I jizzed today as I was using the handles in your bathroom I was why are you so low on conditioner

I think I'm hallucinating because I'm so tired plenty of plenty of plenty of hand soap, but... Hey, you're drinking straight bourbon, right? So I save that for tomorrow night. High-rise straight bourbon. Let's show them that. So I don't even know if it's good,

but this was on the top shelf. Spring Brook Farm Distillery, Adirondack high- Straight Bourbon Whiskey, 43% alcohol by volume. We're going to try this tomorrow. What am I doing? We're going to try this tomorrow. Is it better than Proper 12?

It's a little washed out. I can't quite get it. Proper 12 is not good. You ever had it? Yeah, but I'm not a whiskey guy, so I could tell that it's sort of a... It was very sweet, so I could tell it's sort of a it was very sweet so i could tell it's sort of here's it's trying to be mainstream right i mean yeah i mean the problem

with proper 12 is basically that it's the critics overstate how bad it is they're like oh my god this is like varnish well okay lighten up francis it's not that bad this is the way i explain it if you imagine you had some friends in the summer and you don't have friends but neither do I it's okay but being serious imagine you got invited to a barbecue and you were having just a killer time with friends and you were out of booze and someone rolled through with some proper 12 did you be pumped you'd be pumped because you're like you know what I can drink that that's okay that's full and you can and the good and the good times right right and the good times stay rolling yeah that. That's proper 12's role. But if you're trying to sit around and sample nice whiskeys,

no, it's not for that. That's not the role that proper 12 plays. Okay. I think that's fair, right? When I drink whiskey, I make that weird face, that cunnilingus face that just sort of like, I'm here, am I supposed to be here? Your cunnilingus face does not look like mine.

I look like Gene i look like jean simmons motherfucker i don't think we can use any of this this is ridiculous yeah we could probably use this all right all right um one thing by the way this gets on my nerves to the nth degree can i like vent for just one second i did my hot sauce review we got talking to the microphone i'm here i'm here bro hot sauce is my favorite guy in m1 i did uh i did my dustin party hot sauce review and people seem to like it it's fine but um there are people being like oh luke says he's not an expert then he goes on talking about all these processes by which hot sauces are made and you can tell the difference between them i'm like right do you understand there's a different like the the two roles with having knowledge about something are not no nothing expert there are there are tears

yeah no there are tears to it you can be literate about things and it's okay i am not i could have not i've ever fought but still know a little about the fight game exactly isn't that funny how that i could have covered boxing more than i've covered mma yet actually have seen a lot of MMA in my life. Isn't that funny? Isn't it funny how that works, that you can still be literate about things and have a degree of expertise, certainly. I didn't get any degrees.

I got an associate's degree. I'll give myself that credit. What's your associate's degree in? In AS in General Studies. You're a failure. You know, I think I underachieved for most of my life but the last couple years Luke I'm making up for it you're killing the game right now

will you fuckers stop you say you're not an expert then you go into these details I'm not an expert, an expert knows whatever I know ten times more than that a hundred times, a thousand times more than that I know enough to know my way around some of the basics on hot sauces.

That's it. No more, no less. So please, you fucking losers out there who are like, well, I don't want to learn nothing because I don't want to pretend

I know nothing. Learn as much as you can about everything. It will make your decisions in life easier. Like you've never been with another man. You've never delivered filet.

You'd probably be pretty good at it will you talk into the microphone you fucking moron I don't even know how to follow that and like do damage control James Buchanan doesn't get the respect historically though for for blazing first of all I had a

joke on you yesterday about the same topic that I can't repeat here I think it's about you blowing your dad of all things terrible what are we doing here

alright dude you are in bad shape yeah every time this piece of shit goes hashtag fired up understand that when he comes to do

hotel room service diaries he's a nothing he's a zilch i drank two drinks last night two drinks the night before that's you know i'm i'm 42 luke glasses hang on i need my glasses um hang on just a second regale them with your story all right i'll i'll talk to them while you do that, alright? Yeah. So, um... Um... You know, maybe I'll just wait for you, Luke. I mean, I've been

creating original content all day. Can you get my glasses from over there, please? So here's what I do, Luke. All day I've been creating original content. By the end of it, Luke, I'm ready to play cover songs. You know what I mean? No, I know. That's a metaphor, Luke, for the kind of... I know, I know ready to play cover songs. You know what I mean? All right, we'll play some songs here. No, I know.

That's a metaphor, Luke, for the kind of... I know, that gets you in the mood right there. The black guy. Because I'm old and pathetic, I can't see shit. Hang on. Do you think it's manly when a man spins a chair around? Not per se this type of chair. It's very wide, but does that Tony Danza spin the chair around who's the boss thing i like how your reference was an italian guy

and mine was duane wade from good times duane wayne duane wayne from from a different world no from good times wasn't it good times it's touching thighs um good times was okay we touch thighs just not, you fucking loser. We're not your dad and son. So, Luke, families that love each other, families that slay together, stay together. Okay, Luke? Let us slay. All right.

Let's pull up these questions. All right. I like it when people who write angry tweets to me like their own tweet. Yeah. That's always fun. All right, let's see. Mikey sent us these questions, right?

Yeah, Michael's a hell of a producer. Have another drink, loser. I'm drinking this premium hard seltzerzer here luke trying to lessen the load of the hangover masagave grapefruit so that's principally would you would you call this a female drink would you call this uh i'll call drinks female drinks why because females are allowed to drink also they could drink you under the table you have you are a nothing well what would make a drink a female drink like in high school if someone was drinking something like this we'd we'd make oh i tend to think that's the kind of drink you could get to get

women to come to your party no we would make comments about their uterus yeah but that's because you guys were idiots we were you know in the runoff of the factory luke do you know women are your equal right you understand that you're? You're aware of that? I'm married, Luke. I understand that completely. They might even be my superior. You don't want to sound bitter about it. All right. I don't want to answer this one because this is not the spirit of the show.

Could you rank the toughest matchup for Max Holloway in a rematch between these three, Volkanovski, Poirier, and McGregor? Well, it's not Volkanovski because he kind of almost beat him or came as close as he could. Poirier fight was not especially close. I think he won like 49, 46. Let's not say it wasn't close. Score-wise, maybe not three rounds to two,

but competitive, right? Competitive is all hell. One of the more competitive fights in the history of the sport. You're fucking out of your mind. I sat there. I understand. People ask me about this. How do you think he does against McGregor? The thing is, I don't know.

I mean, could I see McGregor kind of line them up? No, Max doesn't get lined up on, bro. You know what I'm saying? This new Max, who's adding so much to his game, that's a hell of fight luke connor said this week he's into it he's into that idea of max yeah could you see connor as the champion or maybe dude all right like boy back at 145 no no i'm talking about lightweight here okay let me let me ask you this let me ask you this this is maybe the last real fight question we'll have. If Conor wins the championship and doesn't get Habib,

we all assume, okay, he's going to get the winner of Hooker Chandler or Oliveira or... He won't get Dan Hooker. I really don't... Or Gaethje off a win. He got worked over by Poirier in the end. So what if he gets, instead of Nate Diaz for a trilogy, what if he gets Max Holloway for his first title defense

for the damn lightweight championship in a rematch? Like, that's an event. If Chandler wins, that's a travesty. If Chandler loses... That's an event. That's a freaking event. I know Oliveira would be pissed about that, but I wouldn't hate it. Oliveira and Hooker, how much I love them,

are not marketable enough for the risk involved. Right? Maybe. Will Dana give Conor the type of matchmaking that will keep him the champion, Luke? Or give him a fighting chance to be, right? Maybe. Will Dana give Conor the type of matchmaking that will keep him the champion, Luke? Or give him a fighting chance to be, right? Maybe. Okay, I'll see.

Luke, what's a tougher match for this version of Conor? Tony Ferguson or Justin Gaethje? I don't care right now. I don't care right now. And I know you don't either. That's not what the show's about. It's about dicks. Yeah, the show's about everything other than that.

All right. Regarding the dubbing of walkout music, no one seems to care about the subject, so if the viewer's not able to listen to the walkout music and the artist's songs are not being heard, then who benefits from the dubbing? So you ever watch, like, a fight pass? Yeah, because they run out of the rights.

Yeah, they lose the rights. I mean, it's tough. It's rough. It's disappointing, but you get it, right? Do it on the WWE Network, the same thing. Same thing on the old school pay-per-views. All right, here's tough, it's rough, it's disappointing, but you get it, right? Doing it on the WWE Network, the same thing. Same thing on the old school pay-per-views. All right, here's a question. I don't have an answer for it,

but I think we can use it to branch out. Someone goes, does Luke have a favorite Premier League team? Not really. I pay more attention to Arsenal than anyone else. Obviously, the bigger clubs, like this one, certainly more successful, like Man City or Liverpool or something like that.

Chelsea. Chelsea's better, but they're not like world beaters or anything. I pay attention to what they're up to, but I don't really care. I don't watch Premier League that much. It's a fine league. I'm not going to talk shit about it. Is it because most of the performers are white? Dude, it's an international league, bro.

It's an international league. But I'm sorry. I'm just... I'm much more interested in what's happening in Spain. It's just a personal thing. I'm not asking anybody else to care. How about Colombia? You never talk about the Colombian league.

The Colombian professional league is called Liga... I think it's Liga Postaban. It's fucking horrendous. It's so bad. So here's the thing. If you look at the best Colombian players, they're all in Europe. Like Andres Escobar could play in it now is what you're saying. I knew that you were being the piece of shit that you are.

What? Come on. Hey, remember that guy that was fucking murdered? Let's talk about him as a reference point for all things Columbia. You know what it was? That was a body shot that I knew I could end the fight with

and I took the chance right there. No, it's not a body shot. It's a low blow. Now we have to pause for five minutes. So we can fight. Yeah. It's a low blow. Dude, you don't understand.

Like, people who... I said nothing about Anything that Let me say Let me say one thing Please And I mean this In all sincerity You gotta understand

The reality of this shit You cannot You cannot Go to Columbia I'll tell you You're 42 I'm 41 So we are roughly

The same age You cannot go to Columbia Today And find people Our age Who have their Families intact

It is not Possible So you're saying this ain't like making fun of dale senior going into the wall this has deeper consequences it's not it's not it's not it is that is that is a metaphor what happened to uh dale senior was was literal um but what happened to andres escobar while literal is also metaphorical dude uh i've never i've never talked about this before my wife's dad was murdered her uncle is you know missing a part of his leg because he kicked the bomb out of a movie theater our best friend Hota

his dad was kidnapped by the FARC like it goes on and on and on and on so when you make these fucking jokes I know you don't feel it that way but dude it's a lot of damage of that grenade I threw right now just a lot of it's a lot of pain it's a lot of damage of that grenade I threw right now. It just killed the mood. It's a lot of pain. It's a lot of pain. And it's not the parties. I've been to Colombia and I've partied there.

Now, I'm not cool here. I'm not cool there. But they're all quick to remind you the coke that they produce, it's not for us. Or excuse me, when they say us, they mean them. It's for Los Estados Unidos, Europa. That's who it's for. This is how you remind me of what I really am. Look, I'm an asshole, okay?

You want me to say it? I'm an asshole, all right? Look, I'm sorry for that crack, okay? No, listen, I'm not here to say it's like the equivalent of, you know, I've been joking about it. Like, oh, it's the same as like Auschwitz jokes, okay? It's not quite on that level. I don't have that in my arsenal, okay?

Okay, I'm just saying I don't think Americans understand like the pain that they send. You know, dude, you know, you asked about why my wife came to this country. Well, your fucking dad gets murdered. You might rethink where you're going to be living in this world, man. It's a huge thing. Yeah. Okay?

Okay. Comedy has a high price, and it just costs us our friendship. I love you, but good talk, okay? Be careful with that shit. Okay. Question for you is this, though. Not Premier League. What are your teams, sports teams?

Boston Celtics. Well, that's a Connecticut. Isn't Connecticut divided between New York, Connecticut, and then Boston, Connecticut? It's much more a definitive divide when you're talking Yankees and Red Sox. I happen to be a Mets fan. Mets fans are kind of sprinkled, but there's almost a line in the state. You're a Mets fan? I did not know this. There's almost a line in the state that separates Mets and Yankees and Red Sox. I happen to be a Mets fan. Mets fans are kind of sprinkled, but there's almost a line in the state. You're a Mets fan?

I didn't know this. There's almost a line in the state that separates Yankees and Red Sox, but the other sports, it's kind of general. There's a lot of Knicks fans in Connecticut. There's also a lot of fans that... It's more typical. I'm atypical.

It's more typical that you would love all Boston teams, that if you were a Red Sox fan, you also love the Bruins, Patriots, and Celtics. I just happen to like the Celtics. I mean, I liked the Bruins in the 90s when we were all playing NHL 94 and shit like that. That's funny because, and I'm wrong about this, weren't the Knicks

better in the 90s, in the early 90s? Well, I started, here's the deal. I became an NBA fan. I would go to my grandmother's every day. She would babysit me when my parents were working. And she was a hardcore Boston Celtics fan, Larry Bird fan. So there was a rule in her house that you can't, like, I can have the main TV in the house anytime to watch cartoons,

watch whatever I'm watching as a little kid, unless the Celtics are on. Dude, I'm sorry. You got to wait. You got to watch the whole game. So I begrudgingly watched the Celtics during the 84 championship season, the 85 season when they went to the finals, 86 when they won it again. So then suddenly, you know, by 87, I'm like, I've watched enough basketball, I should be a fan, you know,

and the Celtics had just won, and, you know, it's Larry Bird. I mean, that's my team, you know. They're like the hometown team. So I became a Celtics fan because of my grandmother putting the kibosh on cartoons, you know. And also the work ethic, Luke. I respect the work ethic of that guy. They had a lot of hard-working whites.

Gotta love it. They were good. They were good. But I will say early 90s Knicks with Ewing and... Pat Raleigh as coach. No, no, but who was the other guy, the point guard for the Knicks at the time? Well, Harper in the years they went to the championship, in the years that they were really good.

Who's the other one I'm thinking of? It wasn't Harper. It was another one. They had Doc Rivers the year before. They had Greg Anthony. They had Childs, Charlie Ward. Chris Childs, you thinking of? Was it Ward I'm thinking of?

I don't think so. That was the star player? It was Ewing, and that's it? No, Starks was an all-star in 94. Starks, Starks. Oakley was an all-star in 94. Starks, yes. And Oakley was a motherfucker.

Yeah, and they had Mason. They was a great role player. So, okay, we have football Sunday, which we're going to watch together. So we have, let's see, Buccaneers and Packers. Packers. Who are you cheering for? I'm not a Patriots fan, despite living in Connecticut. I don't really care.

But I like this idea of old guy Brady doing it with the second team. I can't stand it. So I don't have a reason to hate him. So I'm not going to. Excuse me. I can't stand how everyone thinks it's au natural. Is it because he's a big trumpeter that you're upset? No, actually, dude.

Because he's a rich asshole? How could you cover MMA if you didn't like athletes who like Trump? Seriously. Did you see Jorge and Andreas Hill? What the fuck was that? Did you see that as well? That went from zero to dark 30 in a second. Okay, I have my feeling about that.

Who do you think got the best of it? Andreas. Yeah, he did. He brought it. He's a smart dude. I love that guy. He covers all three combat sports. He doesn't get the love that he deserves in this space.

I know he's had a great career covering. I know he was boxing in MMA. What's the third? was yeah big time pro wrestling guy and it was not a sport okay i'm not here to debate that but you know that guy's head that guy had a because it's not up for that guy had a decorated career in in the hat in the hip-hop in uh you know music uh game working for you know source and all different kinds of things did he really oh yeah he's got a great resume a killer resume i've come around to him him slowly, but every time I take a second look at him, I'm like, this dude is impressive. He's extremely impressive.

He's hilarious as shit, Mark. Yeah. Anyway, you know what the killer blow was? By the way, to be clear, I don't know if Jorge runs his own Twitter account, so we should be clear that it could be his managers, it could be somebody else. You smell kawa on that? It's possible. I mean, they were going back and forth, too.

Yeah, it's possible. I mean, they were going back and forth, too. Yeah, it's possible. But he brought the fact, like, MLK, oh, Trump is loved by the MLK family. And then you find out it was one of, like, the conspiracy theorist nieces who got a pardon after committing a series of crimes. And, like, virtually every other MLK family member on record can't stand him. You know, again, for better or for worse, but that's the reality. And then Andreas sort of cites it. It was a bad look for Jorge, I feel like.

But here's my point. It's like, I actually love the fact that the fighters we cover don't share my political opinions really at all for the most part, because it really forces you to let that shit go. It actually forces you to just be like, not that I don't care about the things that I care about, but as it relates to covering these guys, let it go.

Well, I don't care about politics, so it doesn't get in the way of my coverage, okay, Luke? Yeah, you're cool, man. You're cool. You're so above it, you know what I'm saying? Like, everyone else is down here, but you, you're up here. Everyone else is stressed out over at Luke, you know what I mean? I'm just, I'm eating and I'm living, you know?

Just an ignorant fool over here, you know? Okay, let's see what they got to say. Do you think Israel Adesanya, who gives a fuck? Israel Adesanya versus Blachowicz will be closer to Israel

versus Yoel or Costa? Who is counted out more, Stipe or Blachowicz? What? It'll look more like the Costa fight. He's going to slice through Jan. And what was the second half? Who cares?

All right. Two questions for the pale orc and his subordinate. I guess that makes you the orc. I would have thought the opposite, actually. I mean, you're pretty pale, Luke. Yeah. For an Armenian, you're pretty pale, Luke. Yeah. For an Armenian, you're pretty pale. Super pale.

Who would benefit more, all things considered, from a proper team at camp? Cowboy? Are we doing these fucking questions? Really? Perry or Ferguson? Ferguson, right? No, sorry.

What am I saying? Perry. Perry would really... Perry has almost no structure in his life, right? I agree with that. Yes, yes. yes also which current UFC champ do you think

would benefit most from a change of camp someone says love you dudes please don't change the thing don't change you know what they're saying don't change your ignorance

level you asshole I don't think that they mean that which current UFC champ would benefit from a camp change champion change?

The answer is Cowboy, Perry, or Ferguson. We saw... Oh, no, they said which UFC champ. Those guys aren't champs that you mentioned. So we saw what Usman did in one camp. Am I overrating the improved striking Usman showed against Jorge Masvidal? I don't think so, but no one else seems to care like I do. Yeah, like Trevor Whitman, that looked great.

So maybe it's him who could evolve a lot quicker when you change it up. I mean, look, there's been many. You don't see it as much in MMA and boxing. It's more prevalent where you get a star who bounces, like Oscar De La Hoya, Miguel Cotto, guys who had the long three-fight runs with big-name trainers and then went on to another one and went on to another one. And their goal was to round out their game, and maybe were bored i don't know whatever bc my man how are

your internal organs from all the gas station food not good tell us your horror gas station toilet stories well they want the pee pee poo poo humor i did i did shut down the toilet at at the malta studios yesterday yesterday. Did you? Yeah. It was hilarious. You know what? Now you're bringing it up. I remember. We get to the studios this morning and Brian's like,

whoo, I took the dump of all dumps. And there's this dude. He's the coolest. Let me be true or false. The sound guy at Malka is the coolest guy in the room. Love that guy. By far the coolest guy in the room.

And he goes, oh, that was you? And I was like, oh like oh wow somebody was there to witness the monstrosity um i mean i've got a lot of gross stories i don't think that's what you really want but no i don't my body does not feel good eating that stuff i really gotta stop but um luke i had this problem because i you know i've traveled i've driven a lot i've traveled a lot throughout the years uh um and you know you eat bad you eat gas station lot throughout the years. And, you know, you eat bad. You eat gas station food on the road. You stop and you take a dump and the rest stops.

I had this consistent stretch of people walking in on me in a stall in a public bathroom when I'm trying to. Like, you think you got it locked? Trying to masturbate? No, no. You're just dropping a deuce. And somebody like, you know, I one time pulled over on the Jersey Shore. Like, I'm on the Jersey Turnpike after midnight, and I'm alone in there dropping a deuce alone. And some dude's standing outside my stall, and he's trying to bring it.

I'm like, dude, I'm in here. I'm in here. I'm in here. I'm in here. He got the door open, and he's just looking at me, you know? I had that happen in so many public situations, Luke. It's gross, you know? Yeah, bro.

I feel you, bro. You know what I'm saying, bro i feel you bro you know what i'm saying bro shit bro uh let me ask you this let me ask you this if you were given the chance to experience one of the following activities 100 years into the future right so that's the deal you have to experience it 100 years into the future. Would you rather, at that time, watch a movie, listen to an album, or watch an MMA card? So the album, I'm assuming,

would be new music 100 years from now. Yeah, I'm guessing they're not doing covers, motherfucker. Like I'm not listening to my 70s vinyl records. Yeah, they're not listening to fucking Julian Mitchell. Okay, what would I be most interested in seeing the evolvement 100 years from now? The year 2121. Oh, 2121, right? Hell yeah, right?

Fast barf. I think I'd pick music. I'd be very... Well, no, I wouldn't pick music. Because if you're just going to show me the pop hit of the moment. It's going to be terrible. It's going to be terrible. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Yeah, I guess MMA. Show it to me. I'd be a little bit more – as interested as I would be to see 100 years from now if this sport is still here and if it looks anything like it looks now in terms of the evolution of styles. And I'd be even more interested to see the fighting surface around it and how it's covered and shot and is it robots fighting each other by then luke there's a lot i think about it they didn't say you couldn't do drugs so like why would you not do the movie or the music

i movies don't move me as much as uh fighting does look i want to see what happens all right what about a movie about fighting what if they have it in 2021 here comes the boom part two is that where you're going with that stalling paul blart the mall cop uh movie look that's a good movie it's not a good it's a good movie it's funny my kids love it i know your kids love it i'm not gonna shit on your kids but it's not a good movie. We know superheroes aren't BC's thing, but somebody, please get him onto the Deadpool movies. My superheroes fight in a cage, Luke. Have you ever watched the Deadpool movies? No.

Do you know anything about Deadpool? No. Deadpool is sort of designed to be everything that superhero movies are not. Any reason that you might ordinarily hate superhero movies, you're supposed to like these. Be that they're gory in the most intense way. They go over all the cliches and shit on them

in an active way. It's like the antidote to all of the stuffiness of superhero movies. Deadpool does that. Sounds interesting. You should give it a try. There was a house down the street from me growing up

near my grandmother's house. We'd drive bikes by all the time. And 10 years earlier, a guy had killed his wife in the pool. And we used to call it Deadpool. And we'd get really nervous as we'd drive by and do the bikes as fast as we can just in case the ghost of that lady came back and tried to kill us.

Jesus, that is a morbid thought. Yeah, I grew up in a factory town. What factory? I don't know if you know this. You probably don't, Luke. What factory? Here it is. I come from Naugatuck, Connecticut.

Have you ever heard? Naugatuck, Connecticut. There was a wing in our high school called the Goodyear Wing. It was a building. Why, Luke? Because have you ever heard of Charles Goodyear, the man who invented rubber? He vulcanized it on his stove by accident.

Did he invent rubber, or is rubber naturally occurring? He invented the process of vulcanizing rubber in Naugatuck, Connecticut, Luke. He wasn't from there, but he was living there. That name still matters around town. So the factories for years had a lot to do with rubber.

They made those shoes Keds, you know? Bass bar. Luke, do you ever hear of the shoe brand Keds? Oh, I've heard of Keds. Keds were made in my town. Every basic bitch age 35 and above wears. When I was a kid, I would go down to the Keds factory for the secondhand stuff. And then, Luke, do you know that in my town, you've had a Mounds or Almond Joy, right?

Well, both of them are tier five remember they were made by peter paul and then hershey bought them they were exclusively made in my town when in the 80s and this is not like you're like you worked in a coal mine these are not coal mine conditions i didn't say it was west virginia i didn't say it was like kevin pitt snog all over we got black lung making the uh quote uh almond joy are joy. Are you trying to decode the toughness of my factory town by judging what they made? A little bit. Y'all made motherfucking candy. What, did they make bullets?

If there was Colt 45 in Hartford, Connecticut, which is the Colt. So, have you ever worked in a factory? Damn right I have. Which factory? I worked in a small parts shop. No, no, no, no, no. It was a factory. It has to be an assembly line.

It was a factory, and I was the shipping and receiving manager, and I made small parts. So day-to-day, what did you do? It was a sheet metal. I handled all the stuff that was getting, you know, I'd box up all the parts that had to get shipped out. Sometimes I'd deliver them. I'd handle all the paperwork.

Yeah. You never worked actually on the assembly line did you in the factory so you now you're trying to now you're trying to say that i have worked on an assembly line in a factory you're saying because i'm from a factory town that makes products that aren't manly and because although i work in a factory it's like you make candy and because although that's one step away from Santa's North Pole. And because. We make toys.

We make almond joy. And because in the 203, I worked at a factory in my 20s, but didn't work on the assembly line. Then I'm not. You didn't work in a factory. Then I'm not tough suddenly. You didn't work in a factory. I have worked in a factory. Where?

So. Marietta? Actually, as a matter of fact, Marietta, Georgia. There was a company that made furniture and i was the guy at the very end of the assembly line on the line before it gets put into the truck i had to wrap all the furniture in cardboard and then with plastic to make sure that it got onto the truck without getting damaged or scratched or bumped which included lifting turning setting everything up cutting the cardboard all day long as all this shit kept firing down the line.

Yeah, motherfucker. I did that from 5 a.m. to fucking 4 p.m. every day in the summers. Yeah. Well, Luke. Suck the fattest of dicks, my friend. When I dropped out of college in the year. That was between college years. In the year 2000, I immediately got a full-time job at a.

Here is my summers. I'd go to college i get home i do tad temporary active duty with the marine corps i would go and spend six to sometimes nine weeks with them and then the rest of my time i would go and work in a factory eat my balls guy you talk all this shit about how you're from a factory town only one of us has worked in factory how was the ac and when you were doing paperwork in the factory? How was that AC? I was boxing them up.

Luke, I will say this. When I dropped out of college, I worked at the nursing home. I was on the assembly line. Sometimes it was my job to put the milk on the tray as it came by. Sometimes it was my job to put the fruit cup on there. People are like, oh, Luke's a snob. I'm like, motherfucker, I've earned my keep, bro. I've done all the hard jobs.

Yeah, Tim wants to know if you want to meet him tomorrow. I've done all the hard jobs you can imagine. I worked fast food. You worked fast food? You're damn right. I worked at McDonald's 6 a.m. Saturday and Sunday mornings for two years. Okay, player. Okay, I see you. Home over as shit.

Okay, player, I see you. I see you. I worked at Chick-fil-A. I worked at Chick-fil-A. And I was the janitor at Stop and Shop for three years during college, so don't give me that shit, okay? Okay, that's just being a loser. That's different.

I had three jobs. I was going to college full time at night. I backdoored this shit too, okay? All right, all right. Shake for me, girl. I want to be your backdoor man. I was that man.

I was the lizard. Okay, I've worked in a factory. I have earned my fucking keep. All these assholes because I have ambition to do things, all of a sudden I'm the pretentious prick. I worked seven years at ESPN until three in the morning on holidays and weekends.

Let's talk about ESPN. What was it like? Equally the most amazing, best thing I've ever, job I had, and really frustrating. All right, let's do the good thing. What was great about working at ESPN?

Did you work on what they call the campus? Yes, I was in Bristol, Connecticut. I grew up 20 minutes from there. It feels like a college campus. It's fun as shit. I toured it when I was a speechwriter. They hired me one time. There are so many.

There's a lot of young people. It feels like a family if you've been there a long time to a certain degree, depending on your situation. There's celebrity there's opportunities there's great activities all that stuff is top shelf the disney connection is ridiculous luke i mean i went i i was broke away i was broke as shit with young kids and a wife my first five six years there and i went to disney world three different times because you get um free admission to the parks.

Do you? Any time of the year except for certain blackout dates for you and the people that live in your house, the immediate people in your house. Then they would give you, and then you get 50% off resorts, 30% off merchandise, 25% off restaurants there, and then they would give you a certain amount of passes per year that you can give out, the one-day passes you can give out to free to people.

So it's insane. And it's not just that's ball it's not just the orlando parks it's um the resort hawaii it's it's disneyland in la it's the resort of the disney dessert resort in hawaii it's the international resort it was everything let me ask you why did you have kids in life as early as you did? I got married and we were pregnant within three months. No way. It wasn't planned, but it wasn't unplanned.

You know, you just... You just rolled the dice. I mean, I was... To be honest, I was 28. I was about to turn 29 when I got married. My wife and I, I think both... Did you have...

Your parents were... They're still together, right? Yes. Are your wife's parents still together? No. Okay, well, obviously, you know, my mom passed away and then my mother... Your parents were still together, right? Yes. Are your wife's parents still together? No. Okay. Well, obviously, my mom passed away, and then my wife's father passed away.

So we both grew up in homes that were just not normal in that particular regard. And then before that, my parents had split up. Both of us were like, we're not having kids until we are 1000 ready and we probably in retrospect i'll be honest we waited too long we should have had them a little bit earlier but um it is what it is bro i'm not gonna lie to you i you know i'm a wild and goofy ignorant guy but um i knew you know pretty early in my in my 20s that fatherhood was like more than career ambitions more than anything fatherhood was the most important thing that was going to be like my legacy in life and i took that shit seriously

and when i finally met the right person i mean we got married the the one year anniversary of our first date it was one of those things where you knew that you knew that you really yeah oh yeah and during that that year that we dated i was working stupid hours at you know overnights on the at espn so how long you you been married now? Like 11 years? 13 years. And I will say that I just knew I was ready. It was time. I mean, I was, you know, 28.

I mean, I was ready to get married and have kids and raise these sons, you know? All right. Let's lighten the mood here a little bit. I want to play some. Yeah, let's talk about the Escobars, please. Yeah, let's talk more about the Escobars. It's fun to make fun of dead Colombians, you know what I'm saying? If I had brought up a dead white man, would it have been okay, Luke? Colombians can be white.

You see my wife. Does she look white to you? If I had made a joke about Corey Lytle, if I said, you know, good picture, horrible pilot, right? You'd have been like. Yeah, but that's one person. That's not a society. Kill whitey. Yeah, it would have been great, right?

It's not a society. I brought up a dead Colombian. They touched the spot the spot luke touched the spot yeah yeah i'm sorry sorry for being um you know aware of things hold on let me put something for you i want you to honestly rate this i want you to want me oh. How about this? This guitarist grew up loving Metallica, right? Yeah. I see the artist. Pantera.

Pantera. Badass, yeah. Yeah. The song is called Piss. I mean, you know, R.I.P. Dimebag Daryl, Luke. You don't see me making Dimebag jokes. I wouldn't care if you did. It's one person.

Because he's white. Because he's white American. What do you think? Yeah, I love it. How about this? Pick up the shotgun! Kill your family, baby! Hang on now. How about this one?

Let's see. I see your plan. You're trying to make me go, oh yeah, Pantera, that rocks, man. You know, it's Metallica-esque. It's good. And then you're like, here's Cannibal Corpse.

Same thing, right? I don't know. It's not the, you know, it's not the, hey, eating ass is okay. Also, can we do cannibalism? Who was the name of that guy? Army Hammer? We had a meeting at a Showtime. Hold on.

Let's pause this. We had a Showtime meeting, and I never heard of this guy. But apparently there's this dude named Army Hammer. Yeah, sure. Or Armand. Or Armand Hammer. Army Hammer is his name. And apparently he was, like, sending DMs to bitches being like,

I'm trying to break your bones, drink your blood. He's a cannibal. He grew up the grandson of an oil tycoon. Super normal. And his ex-girlfriend came out and said that he would try to like suck on her wounds if she had like a cut or something. Dude, that is super fucking sketch. Luke, I would suck on your wounds emotionally, but not physically, okay? I'd help you through some shit, but I'd be a shoulder, Luke.

You know what I mean? As long as we were fully clothed for you to cry on. Yeah, that's great. Hold on here. Like we do. Look, this documentary crew is taking this shit seriously, right? I know. A little more seriously than I'm comfortable with.

All right, here we go. Here we go. Ready? See what you think of this this hip-hop this song this vinny paz oh no no no no when i was in high school in 1998 in georgia this song was the song okay okay here we go give it a second take some tickets i'm gonna get going hang on now. Once it kicks off, I'll put the microphone there for folks who are listening. What darkness is the light? You know the moon come for the sun. Here we go.

Here we go. They from Marietta? Yeah, why? You think they prefer crystals in their hand or the drive-thru? Yeah. Those plot like we do. Who get it crunk like us What do you think? I mean, it's okay, Luke Fucking hate you

It's not, you know It's not Black Sheep A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing A classic record, you know Here we go, here we go, here we go They be claiming to be fat But I'm gonna clip their minds If they truly can have it record you know here we go here we go here we go what do you think about those bars yeah solid bars son yeah yeah yeah take you a picture. Here we go. All right, all right. You didn't like that because you're white. That's okay.

I forgive you. You know, I like a lot of, I love third base, Luke. I like Pop Goes the Weasel. No, but look, legitimately, I don't know if you ever heard the Cactus album, their debut. It's a classic. It holds up to this day. They were great. Years ago.

I've not heard it recently. They were great, Luke. Okay? I mean, you know, the gas face, you ago they were great okay i mean you know the gas face you know you know what i mean oh gas face we used to have a bit on the gas face where we would take that bit that whole bit yeah yeah yeah and we would hang up on callers on my radio show we would play it with the junkies at first but we would do it as well all right hold on let's play a couple of these couple of these fucking songs, player. Goddamn player. Bitch. Wanting to be a bitch. All right, so we want to play some Vinny Paz.

Do we really, though, Luke? Yeah, we do, because you're being a bitch. Here we go. So this song was produced by, you know DJ Premier. I mean, not personally. None of us know DJ Premier personally. What's the word, Lord? I love how rappers call themselves God and Lord.

Hova. Hova, yeah. You should use just a ho, though, you know? Here we go. DJ Premier. Vinny Pass, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. On the track. Let's go.

White guy, right? Born in Italy, but yes. You have to tap that, bitch. Yeah. That's pretty good. Those are good bars, my friend. Yeah, I mean, that guy can spit, right? Hard bars. What do you think about Mumford & Sons? One of my sons loves them.

It's solid. I mean, it's pop, but it's solid. What do you think about... It's really good. No, seriously. There's some live shit they have that's really good. They got a couple tracks I can fuck with. What do you think about Avett Brothers?

I'm less... Dude, they got a couple tracks they're they're really good i just have not spent a lot of time you know what i mean yeah they got a couple tracks that'll break you i discovered both avid brothers and um mumford and sons after a breakup the worst time to find them, motherfuckers, man. All right, here's Mumford & Sons. You gotta understand the bars that I have. My name is Brian Kams.

I come from the factory town. Yeah, it's time to get down. Stop, please. Who was it that came out to Mumford & Sons? Was it Andre Feely? He used to walk out to Mumford & Sons. I'd be like, bro, you got better choices than this. I don't know that shit.

Is this you trying to be the sauce? No, no, no. Trying way too hard? No. Look, nothing kills a good buzz like you. You know what I mean? I mean, to be really honest with you. Yeah. I do have to say, I like the guy that don't have a drummer.

It's just one dude who banks with an automated thing. Here we go. And it was your heart on the line. Here we go. That's so disgusting. It's so stupid, but I love doing it. All right, back to the questions, Luke, okay? Back to the question at hand Right From a young G's perspective right

You know what good point Didn't he go to the hospital recently He may have COVID it's possible Is that what it was I thought he had like a heart issue or a brain issue He had an aneurysm You're saying the murder was the case that they gave Snoop No it wasn't in any capacity whatsoever.

Just you being a weirdo. God, that album's so good. It's just one of the best. It's just one of the best. All right, here we go. There's more questions about MMA. I don't give a fuck. All right, here we go.

Favorite debut album. Enter Da Stage by Black Moon. Sneaky pick here for some 90s boom bap hip hop. Favorite debut album. That's a great question. Dude, Wu-Tang 36 Chambers is fucking... It's a masterpiece. You and I were talking earlier.

The first Rage album. It's a master self-titled topped about it reminds me of acdc's back in black whereas it is it is perfect start to finish luke yeah it's a masterpiece um i mean jeremy hendrix's are you experienced is just it's the greatest hits album in one album it's what obscure 70s nothing are you currently putting your pants around your ankles for in your orange subaru i listen to a lot of todd run grin right now um dave mason uh you know um so much joni mitchell you know a hard factory town white guy like me getting up on some joni you know never worked in a factory though i have i have you know i definitely more like the amy grant cover of the pink paradise put up a parking lot kind of thing

i mean luke don't it always seem to go right what happened to your 90s references they've gone from the show by the way they stopped putting at the bottom of the screen what do i perform for nothing what am i you know did you get paid by the hit on those? By a puppet? You know what I mean? Give me another debut album that you love, Luke, okay? Debut album. Kill Them All is pretty good. I never got into it like others. No?

Do I like a little bit more of the better produced and justice for all, the better produced Master of Puppets but still hard? Yes. better produced and justice for all the better produced master of puppets but still hard yes you know falling back on that ass with a halified gangsta getting funky on the mic like an old patch of collard greens that's pretty nice oh yeah did he's you know what's amazing to me is snoop has completely sold out which is to say like he'll do ads for anybody at this point you know like beer and t-mobile telecom doesn't matter trailer yeah doesn't matter and everyone's like yo snoop's still so cool there was a time man when you were an artist and you would do those kinds of things

it was like super frowned upon and then all of a sudden like hustle culture replaced it where now if you just go and get that money everyone is like super in favor of it now kind of like us right uh i feel like this shows the opposite of that like we push we repel advertisers i do like luke if there's been any silver lining in the ridiculousness this week you know and not again this ain't like we're not storyboarding

a documentary this is real life here you and I Luke I think we've we've grown closer for real yes you have finally understood that my message

of unity is the correct one U-N-I-T-Y is our unity would you have banged Latifah in the 90s she never and you know me.

I am partial to... Anything not white, really. To Big Booty? Queen, L-A-T-I-F-A-H. I am certainly quite partial to it. And she wasn't exactly my cup of tea. She had bars, though. Did she?

Did she have bars? Did she have bars? I stand by the queen. Okay, she was a good actress. Wasn't she a good actress too? I think she has certainly been an enormous success. Listen, she just wasn't my cup of tea. That's all I'm saying.

I would have banged her before I banged you. Isn't she partial to the other sex? I don't... That's not... Look, I would have voted for Buchanan. Oh, I'm sure you would have voted for Patrick Buchanan. I mean, the one who's trying to kick out all the darkies. Let's vote for him.

No, no, no. I was talking more about his other. Oh, his predecessor, James Buchanan? No, no, no, no. Patrick, I read a book the other day about this dude who used to be a. I mean, this guy worked for every Republican you could imagine for 40 years in Washington making advertisements for them. You're talking about when you were a speechwriter for high-level Republicans? I did work for high-level Republicans.

It's true. Everyone's like, you're a super-lib. I'm like, I've worked for Republicans that you voted for. But this guy worked for all of them. But he was telling a story. There was a memo that was circulated in 1964 by Patrick Buchanan. And I forget the other guy who wrote it. Oh, no.

I was talking about James Buchanan. Who the hell is Patrick Buchanan? Oh, he's the damn... Yeah, I know. He's the guy who just doesn't want the darkies. I meant James Buchanan, okay? Because he's racist. But the point being is he wrote a memo in 1964 to the Republican Party basically outlining

we can't get the black vote. It's not possible. Here's what we can do. We can prevent the left from getting the black vote as much as they normally do by lying. And it was this huge memo about how to do it. Luke, what if I told you that all your heroes, regardless of party, were liars?

I don't care about the party. I don't care about politicians. I don't care about the party. I care about policy. Policy. Fall in love with policy care about politicians. I don't care about the party. I care about policy. Policy. Fall in love with policy. Not politicians. Not parties.

Fair? Yeah. I mean, you never know what she could be earning. Fall in love with actually something that materially will improve lives. Not the asshole who does it. And not the party that makes that asshole possible. Fuck all those losers. They're all compromised.

I don't trust any of them. I don't want any of them. I want the policy of them i want the policy i want the policy that's what i want i think that's very fair i like that i like that i like that do you remember how where you were when you first heard natural born killers ice cube and dr dre i don't know how raw that song was it was pretty damn raw about like murdering everybody and shit? Yep, yep. Do you remember that? Yeah.

I remember hearing that and being like, I think I was like 15 or 16. I remember the outrage in MTV when Ice-T had the hard metal band, the Cop Killer song. Yeah, I'm going to dust some shots off. I mean, that was a thing for a while. That was a huge thing.

He got, okay, so that was at the same time Cannibal Corpse was getting banned everywhere. And when Bob, no, no, no. Bob Dole was like, Ice-T. thing for a while that was a huge thing he got okay so that was at the same time cannibal corpse was getting banned everywhere and when bob was like no no bob dole was like iced tea and his brand and blah blah and cannibal corpse and blah blah i know i'm talking about the side of my mouth like a total asshole we can make fun of him because he's white he's white bro it's okay he's fair game mikey wants to know if we've recorded this show yet. Tell Mikey to go S-A-D. I love Mikey.

Get off that. Get off that. No, no, no. What song do you want to hear? Be the jukebox. What do you want to hear? You got a quarter. Pop it in.

I want to hear the choice. How about that song? Keep Their Heads Ringing from the Friday soundtrack. I mean, it's a good song. You know my wife has never seen Friday? I mean, she's from Columbia, Luke. I know. They don't know anything about this shit. I asked her if she's seen Star Wars.

She's like, no. She's like, Star Wars was never big here. Does she like Colombian musicians or actors and stuff? She does, but honestly, not as much as you might imagine. Like, yes, there are obviously... Here's the way it works. When you have a nation so small, Columbia is totally 50 million people.

When it's that small, you kind of have as a thing where everyone has to like a certain... Carlos Vives is the guy they have to like. All Colombians like Carlos Vives. I saw him in concert. He fucking sucked. Fuck Carlos Vives.

To any Colombian watching, I saw this motherfucker in concert at the National... at the Wharf. I saw this guy in concert at the inner at the um at the national uh at the the the wharf right i saw this guy he lip-synced the entire show it was a fucking zumba show and even my wife was disappointed why why not just kick the ball on your own goal at this point right right we walked out we left we left after about an hour because we're like i'm not gonna sit in traffic for your zumba show you're soft carlos you're softening to the idea of andreas escapade jokes you're coming around to it you gotta you

can make them when you've gone through the when you've taken the red pill you haven't taken the red pill you've worked on the assembly line not not in shipping and receiving when you've yeah yeah when you didn't work in the boss's office and the worst thing you could get was a paper cut meanwhile the rest of us got heat exhaustion working on the line difference between you and Yeah, when you didn't work in the boss's office and the worst thing you could get was a paper cut, meanwhile, the rest of us got heat exhaustion working on the line. The difference between you and I is I worked in that factory at age 27, Luke. Not at 18, bro.

Yeah, because you were a fucking loser at 27. There is some truth to that, yes, yes. Yes, I elevated, asshole. I mean, look where I am today. No, no, no, you definitely gained ground. I mean, don't get me wrong, you earned the spot you're in, but at 27, you were fucking around.

Luke, if there's a pro athlete that you can compare my career arc to, who would you go with? That's a hard question to ask, or to answer, rather. I mean, we don't know the ending yet, so saying Lou Gehrig would be rude, right? The dude who died from ALS? Yeah. Who kind of sucked early and then just got a late chance and then took the ball and ran with it?

And maybe realized he should have been there all along, right? Dude, your problem is not that you're stupid. That's not your problem. It's just that I'm an asshole? Is that the thing, Luke? Is that really where you're going with this? You kind of lean into your weaknesses as a crutch. Yes.

Rather than avoiding them. Meanwhile, my parents looked at me like, listen, failure. You have no choice but to not be those things. Wow. All right. I mean, if they would have kissed you on the mouth, it could have been different, though. Could have been weird, bro. Could have been different.

I don't know if there's an athlete like you. You're a little bit unique, dude. You're a bit of a unicorn. Thank you very much. Dude, what's up with the guys with heavy hands shitting on you? Yeah, I didn't hear it, but apparently they think I'm a racist, Luke. Why don't you clear the air here about what happened with JMA stuff? It was a bit.

I made a bad joke about not wanting to watch a card. It just happened to be a Japanese MMA card. I was making fun of you. Luke, do you remember earlier in this show when you did the Habib Nurmagomedov voice? You did it in a way that could be offensive to Russian people. I don't care about Donald Trump or other stuff. I did that same voice and said,

Asakura, like with the awesome announcer voice. The tomahawk chop thing. But I'm a racist now because I did that. You did apologize for it don't don't walk it back dude yeah all right i did it happened you know okay well which is it are you sorry for it or not i'm sorry that it hurt people no that doesn't mean you're sorry i'm sorry for it i'm sorry for it um but no i'm not a real i don't care here's my thought this is what i said today because i got interviewed for this i don't care what did they ask you about the heavy hands

podcast sending me to hell is that what they asked you about? Because I don't care about that. No, no, it's not about that. I got asked in the documentary about what happened with the thing. Here's what was my answer. There's a famous Patrice O'Neill clip. He was on Fox News, God rest his soul, years ago.

And he was with some woman who was like super uptight who worked for one of these ultra-liberal organizations. And first thing he says is, why are we here together? Do you think she knows anything about comedy? Like when you think funny,

do you think this person? He was just totally dressing her down. But the point he made was not about that. Here was what he said in all sincerity. Give me just one second to make this point. Here's what he said and it's true. He goes, what folks don't understand

about people who actually do comedy, the guys who actually produce it, is that comedy, good and bad, it comes from the same place. Sometimes you will try a joke and it will fucking hit. And sometimes you will try it and it will miss. And it will miss badly. But the key is you have to understand it's all about the attempt. And so if they get it wrong, okay. They get it wrong, it didn't work, all right, fine.

Call them out on it, that's fine. But what you have to understand is the place where you enjoy good comedy, the origin is the same as the bad. So my point is, did your joke hit? All right, it didn't fucking hit. But the idea that you should be canceled for it or that everything else you say is subsequent to it

is irrelevant to me is fucking, it's just stupid. It's stupid. Look at this bringing us together, you know? Yeah. Here we go, evil. Here we go. I gotta refill this water here.

I'll vamp while you go and masturbate in the sink. I like to point out, I'm on like my fourth or fifth Beam and Coke. And BC, the factory town guy who has that hard scrabble, is filling up a jug of water like a camel in the desert. How's that water, bro? That water's tasty? That's some money water, huh? Go piss? Will you be able to entertain the crowd while I'm gone?

Yeah, I can vamp. I can vamp. You spent an hour today in HQ vamping about Conor McGregor. Can I tell you how tired I am about talking about Conor McGregor? Pretty sick of it. Also, the bathroom that he's walking into I have touched myself inappropriately in. A number of times. A number of times.

Today, in fact, it's been quite the show. I'm going to play some DC music here. Let's do that. Let's play some DC motherfucking rap, son. You know what? You saw Kodak Black. You saw Lil Wayne get pardons but Lil Wayne and this dude had the exact same charge or pretty close and

Yo, they weren't giving my man any pardons. So Shouts to fat trail from DC Maybach music You know Fat Troll? No, never met him All I want is bitches Big booty bitches Latinos Colombians, baby

Latinos Latinas Luke Can I ask you something personal? Please How do you think this second documentary Is going to work out for Morning Comeback? I'm a little bit less confident about it. I don't think it's going to be that good.

True or false? Was Less Than Jake, our documentarian, a true miracle worker the first time around? He will make this one as good as it needs to be, but I'm a little bit like, uh. Are you trepidatious because of the real life things that went down with like the production bullshit and all that kind of...

It was bad, bro. It was bad. It was really bad. It was an embarrassing week and we did not have the returns on subs that we should have had as a consequence of our content being... What we were saying, I think,

was worthwhile, but the presentation to the audience was shit it was shit it was total shit and it deserves to be called that

and I'm calling it that and I understand their response I really do so I didn't think you were going to talk about that

it was bad dude it was fucking bad like here's the thing when I'm by myself we're using my camera my laptop my lights

my recorder my my microphones. If this comes out bad, okay, Luke's an idiot. That's because Luke doesn't depend on anybody. You don't even depend on me. You tolerate me. Hold on, hold on. In fairness, be serious for just a moment. This is all my gear.

If it fails, I'm just an idiot trying to do my best as a hobbyist. Yeah. If you're a fucking pro, you should not be worse than me. You know what I'm saying? you should not be worse than me. You know what I'm saying? You should not be worse than me. And it's been, it's been bad, dude. It's been bad.

It's been really bad. I can't, I don't even have, there's no shtick for it. I got nothing. It's been embarrassing, so. You want to say, like, basic,

uh, Basic bitches? Basic illusions? Like, it's, we think we're gonna get past it? We'll, we'll survive this. No, no, no this no no I mean like there's some changes in order yeah I mean well you know we're still gonna be on the screen it's there's some changes in order all right I don't I didn't think we were gonna no no we're

not gonna specifically say what they are but there's some changes in order so we'll see what happens right yeah it's it yeah I mean it's up to us as a people to start making some changes you know okay two o'clock time all right i haven't listened to this song in uh since college god i haven't listened to tupac since college oh god okay when i go to play tupac the the song i go to first all the time right oh can i tell you my bruce hornsby song song sorry song story you met Bruce Hornsby he lives in Williamsburg Virginia or he did at the time there's a true story so you guys have heard all good you guys have heard

the song from Tupac changes right if you've not hold on I see no changes. Okay. Okay. Okay. No, he did have something right in there, right? I'll play it. Hold on. Hold on. Although it seems heaven sent, Luke, the world ain't ready to see James Buchanan back in

office, right? A black president. And it changed a little bit, obviously. But here's the point. So Bruce Hornsby lived in Williamsburg, Virginia when I was in college. I'll never forget. I was at the gym. This is a true story, bro.

I was at the gym and I was shooting ho ship shooting hoops and there were two courts were being used and I'm shooting him shooting this guy bumps into me and he was like oh we're just shooting the same thing what you want to team up or whatever they seemed real intentional I don't know who the fuck he was and I was like yeah school was like an old dude I'm like whatever okay my man can shoot hoops a little bit it's gonna be like playing basketball with Prince and having pancakes is a little bit a little bit so to be like playing basketball with Prince and having pancakes. Is that where we're going with this?

A little bit. A little bit. So we ended up doing a pickup game. It was Bruce Hornsby. I didn't know at the time. Are you serious? I love Bruce Hornsby. We played a pickup game.

It was three on three, whatever. We played the whole joint. And he was okay. He scored a little bit. He could run to the basket. He could post up a little bit. He wasn't huge. And afterwards, I was like, hey, I'm Luke.

Nice to meet you. And he goes, yeah, Bruce. I'm Bubba. And I left and some guy goes, what the fuck? You know who the fuck that was?

You know who the fuck that was? Some super white guy. And I'm like, dude, stop. Chill. Who was that? He's like, fucking Bruce Hornsby.

And at the time, I didn't know who Bruce Hornsby was. Because he's white. No, no, no. He's like, Tupac? You know who the fuck

Tupac is and i'm like dude connect the fucking dots and then he played the shit and then the shit went through so yeah i played basketball on the same team with bruce hornsby pickup basketball college william mary there you go suck a dick um yeah yeah uh balls bonanza right no yeah yeah he's a hero one less hungry mouth on the welfare what do you think hubie did to get the two shots?

Do you know which Huey he's talking about? Huey Long? Huey Lewis? Baby Huey? You're like any Huey, really, at this point. Any Huey. I will say this. These lyrics are much more trenchant

in retrospect now. The temerity of them. That's not the word. The omerta involved in this. Do you know what temerity means? Luke, I don't speak Webster's like you do. We speak the same language, my guy. There's nothing wrong with knowing more about it.

I used to ship parts to the factory, Luke. No, I don't know what temerity means. I did. that's what dude at some point you have to sort of wake up to your bullshit a little bit here don't you was it really bullshit lookers at art you know I mean did they tell, put that ear right back the fuck on, right, bro? All right? Come on. You know? He had issues, Luke.

I've got issues. What do you want from me, okay? Van Gogh, not Picasso. I mean, what? Because he's white? Luke, I mean... No, he was Dutch. But could he kick my ass, Luke?

Van Gogh. Yeah. You know what's funny? We went to the Van Gogh... So I went to the Van Gogh Museum with my wife in Amsterdam. Have you been to Amsterdam at all? No. Bro.

I've not been to Europe. Let me look at me. The Dutch. I love the Dutch. Okay? I said it on the Rogan's podcast, too. Yeah, you said a lot of things on Rogan's podcast. It's just nothing about us.

It's just not about you, bitch. It's nothing about our show, though. Hold on. Bro, you go to the Netherlands? When I went to the Van Gogh Museum, I knew him as Van Gogh. You know him as Van Gogh. We all know him as Van Gogh. It's Vinny.

It's fucking Vinny over there. Vinny Stugatz. Oh, you're painting now, Vinny? That's great. Hey, how about you deal with this paint all over your canvas? You know what I mean? So you go to the museum, and then you hear, like, you ever do the museum tours where you ever get the headphones?

No. I've never done that. I mean, I'm sure the headphones? No. I've never done that, Luke. I mean, I'm sure it's great, but I've never done anything as nerdy as that. Dude, your decision to be uncultured is just that. It's a decision. It's a decision you use. Is it like LeBron, Luke? Did I take my talents to the South Beach factories?

You took your talents to fuck town and decided that being a fucking ignoramus was a fucking badge of honor. It's not. It's not a badge of honor. You can be from a factory town and be smart. It's okay. Anyway, hold on. We went there, and the whole time in your earphones, you're like, and this painting by Van Gogh.

I looked at my wife. I go, listen, I'm not saying Van Gogh. It's Van Gogh. And that's just what it's going to be. It's been Van Gogh for 39 years of my life. So one time I was at ESPN and we had a meeting with not Fight Metric, not CompuBox, but somebody who wanted to be in that space. Okay. So I was the ESPN.

Combat Sports Analytics. Yeah, I was the ESPN MMA editor. Brett Okamoto was the lead writer. Brett happened to be in Bristol that day. Brett lives in Colorado. He happened to be in Bristol that day, and we had a meeting, and some nerdy white dude from whatever fight metric wannabe comes in,

and we're talking and having a meeting, and we're presenting, and we're, you know, whatever. And he kept, you could tell he doesn't watch fights, so he kept, you know, this would work great in all Ronda Rousey fights and Brock Lesnar. And we all were like, what? Oh, come on.

I look at it and I'm like, did that fucking say Lesnar? And then three more times in the flow of conversation, he's like, I'm a big fan of B-Rock Lesnar. So it's like, you know, and he's like, well, actually, we would count up the strikes. So, you know, for example, if you're talking about a third fight between Frank Mir and Brock Lesnar, then what do you know? It's just like, wow, wow, bro, wow. Yeah.

There are certain signs where you're just like, dude, this is not the meeting for you. Do you know Rami who runs Fightmetric? Never met him. Okay, so he's a DC guy. I've known him for a long time. Great guy. never met him okay so he's a dc guy i've known for a long great guy never met him though you know like beat like b-shop great guy never met him uh no in all seriousness he's um he's a really really smart guy he's right a bike too listen b-shop could take a little joke i'm not worried about it it's okay dude i love brendan shop no you don't it's okay if you don't have you ever seen the episode i did with him and

no no one has it's still on the internet let's find it hold on let me find it go ahead beneath the belt beneath the belt brent shop and brian campbell in california it was the weekend of gervonta dav Davis against some guy. And we did a really funny episode. I mean, maybe some of the better jokes are edited out, but we did a really funny episode, Luke. Okay? All right? No, you didn't. You know who can decide for themselves, Luke?

The fans. Okay? They can go on YouTube. They can repopulate the clicks. Because according to you, Luke, it's all about the quantity of your audience, not the quality, right? You've got a bunch of QAnon assholes following you, Luke. How do you define quality of audience? Now a painting from Brock Lesnar.

Yes, yes, yes. Oh, shit. Wow, 37K. Oh, shit. Wow. 37K. Dude, I could fart on camera for five minutes and do 38K. The thing about the art of that clip was it's fucking funny, right? It's got a lot of downvotes, too. Let's read the comments, shall we?

Some people might be intimidated sitting next to Big Brown. Not the beige guy. Not this beige guy right here. Let's read the comments, shall we? They're going to be angry towards... Oh, dude, you guys had a jib fucking camera? We had the shit. How do you explain to the audience what a jib is?

It's a camera attached to a crane that can float and go high and low and give you a panoramic shot. So they had these motherfuckers on a jib. So here's the deal what's this a crossover episode with hair product shop and gas station food campbell okay cool i guess um you know i met him for the first time before we filmed this he was a great dude he's hilarious and a real nice guy all right people want me to be mad at brendan because sometimes brendan says things that people don't like and it's like, dude, Brendan has been unceasingly positive influence in my life at every step of the way. Fuck you if you want me to go after him.

It's not going to happen. He's on our same team here. Showtime, right? Same label. Even if he worked for fucking, I don't know, DAZN, it wouldn't happen this way. I've said this before, man. Dude, this industry is filled with fucking snakes, and I have worked with them. And you know exactly who I'm talking about.

All right, Luke, how do you know that I'm not a snake? So do you? I'm just ignorant and quasi a jerk? You could be. You certainly could be. But at this point, there's no reason. I ain't no snake, Luke. And what would give you the reason to think that I was?

That's the point i said i ain't no snake luke okay exactly motherfucker uh tony ferguson type of dude to give his corner advice between rounds is this in the comment section it was a hell of an episode you know dude i love brian campbell uh man Man, Brian Campbell is entertaining. Go check him out on State of Combat. It was a great podcast. It had its day. It was a great podcast.

Tony Ferguson, the type of guy to pre-order pay-per-view events in fear they might sell out. Luke, could we ever get Big Brown on our show? Yeah, sure. I know you guys do Java Jerks all the time. I got him on at MMA Hour a couple times. In studio? No, never in studio. He was in LA, but yeah, I can get him there.

I'm tight with Brandon, dude. People want me to shoot on him. It's not going to happen. Stop waiting for that bus to come. It's not going to happen. What do you think about a rematch? The beige one and the brown one together. That was the first movie. What about a sequel? Barber fixed my man's fade.

Not much, though. Brian, the gas station junkie Campbell. What the hell is going on with Brian Campbell's hair? Good job, Brian Campbell. Brenda is a drama queen more than an MMA knowledge king oh shit why does BC sound so different you know what dude

we've both put on so much weight we're both fat shit now we're so fat early 2018 you look way slimmer look at that dude I look way slimmer. Look at that, dude. Oh, my God. I look young and fun and happy and...

Yeah. That was the weekend... Drew Vonser Davis potential. That was the weekend that I broke my back. In fairness, Brian... Spinal. I'll say this. In fairness, Brendan looks thinner, too.

Motherfucker, we all put on weight. That was the weekend I had to go... My wife's like, you should go get a massage. You can't even, you know, because you hurt your back before and you can't even get out of bed and you're like, it's a fucking mess to go to the bathroom. My wife was like, no, really, you should go get a massage to straighten that out.

And that was when I went to that place and didn't realize that I accidentally signed up for like the full package. And it was like a, it was a Thai place and they had the handlebars on the ceiling and the tiny lady comes in and she's jumping up and down on my back she's kneeing me she's pulling my arms back like she's putting me in like a pro wrestling submission move and uh it was um it was intense ending unhappy but it was very very intense did you call her racial epithets when it was over that's i mean why look i don't even want that to be a joke because it's so untrue. You were like, I'm not watching Rizin, lady.

So, yeah, heavy hands podcast. Shout out to you. All right. Listen, we're going to take shots. You want to be in the public eye? You got to take them. Oh, yeah. You know, I've got to take them.

You know what I'm saying? We've been over this, bro. You know? All right. We've been almost an hour and a half here. We're winding down the world's worst fucking room service diaries ever. Amanda being the best look because it was loose, you know? Was it loose?

Yep. You know what's loose? It's me when I don't have Pepto-Bismol. Which I did not today, and it was a show. Yeah. Luke, did you go to the senior prom? That was the only prom went to oh skipped every dance until i was a senior no but but you did like lid you got a legit suit like you didn't dress like an asshole you look you look good right did you go with a friend a

girlfriend what was the deal i keep telling folks this man it wasn't until i got in the weight room that i got confidence and like whatever else. And I dated a girl who was, her dad was so wealthy. She went to the local private school in town and I went to, I went to Marietta High School. And it was funny. There were girls who went to my high school whose dads were also like dumb wealthy who all knew her. So I remember after the summer vacation, so i went to um if you're okay this is a true story i'm just telling you the story don't fucking kill me for it please please there's something in i don't know if it still exists but in georgia when i was when i

was in high school there's something called governor school governor's um governor's honors uh college what they call it in some places basically the idea is that if you are one of an outstanding students you get nominated by your teacher you have to go and try out at States and if you're one of the sort of top students in the subject matter for which you are nominated you go to this like gifted camp at summer at one of the universities which is using in Valdosta where I lived for a time and I i i got nominated i passed through and i got made to the whole thing and so i went to governor's honors program ghp literally called it for certain

places ghp is that the date right date rape judge got it got it and i went down there and i met the girl who uh was moving to that place and uh anyway she was anyway she was from that town and all the rich people knew her so i rolled up senior year dating that town and all the rich people knew her so I rolled up senior year dating this girl and all the rich people who fucking

never talked my mom was single bro I lived in an apartment my senior year you know what I mean like we didn't have any money and my dad had money but like you know

there was a weird distance between them we didn't really have access to it at the time you didn't really support your shit like just like today no no no

my dad was cool but like my mom would reject his day to day-day money right right right there about that my dad paid for my college and his unwillingness kiss you on the lips really played a fact he didn't want to french me i was like the fuck guy he's like what are you from montreal here in the south anyway long story short i remember senior year i started we were dating and uh the the rich girls who do they when i say never talk to me yes i mean never talk to me all of a sudden a switch was flipped it's like the movie can't buy me love right yeah yeah and it was like you're i'll make up a name you're dating julie wow we love julie so much we're so happy for you, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, get the fuck out of my face, bitch. Wow, class warfare.

So, Luke, did you end up seeing her private school? Yes. She went to Walker. I'll throw it out there. She went to Walker School, which I forget the name of the school. Walker. If you were rich in that area in Cobb County, you sent people to Walker. So that's where she went. You ever stick your face

inside her private school, Luke? More times than once, bro. Big campus. Appropriately sized. We can only make this joke because she was white, I assume. She was white. Okay. She was white. Okay.

She was white. She was white. Okay. And I looked her up about a year ago. She's going to do, she's like super wealthy. She's going to kill the game. She was super smart and good for her. It was great.

But I'll never forget, there were people in my inner circle who would never talk to me. In the high school circle and i started dating her and it was like instantaneous change instantaneous um you you know you got me all my feelings right now about how thin i was in early 2019 with brendan and now i'm fat we're so fucking fat i mean you're a lot fatter than i am though oh yeah quarantine murder your boy but your boy is also in the gym more than you are. I'm at probably a career high of like 233 right now. I'm going to guess you're 278. Yeah, it's about 280.

280. Solid 280. But your boy, I'm doing something about it. What the fuck are you doing? Arting. Arting all over the... I look like shit. I know I look like shit, but I'm doing something about it.

And by that, I mean drinking tons of empty calories. Let's make some changes, all right? Because all I see is racist faces. Misplaced hate makes mistakes. They're racist. We under. Let's go to Williamsburg. Let's play basketball with Bruce Hornsby.

Let's figure this shit out. I wonder if he would remember you, you know? I doubt it. He was there all the time wow now tell me about william and mary not the campus the people who were they luke who is bill you know uh you mean like the people who founded the charter founders what's the story of these this couple did they bang what happened i don't know the the i don't know the story of the founding they were related to the english monarchy but beyond that i don't know much um yeah it was

interesting it was a lot of people who imagine the nerds who are like listen okay so let me give an example the three predominant schools in virginia are william and & Mary from an academic standpoint. What does predominant mean? Like which ones are national standouts for academia inside? Virginia Tech, Blacksburg. Virginia Tech is a big one. UVA is the other one, and there's William & Mary. Okay. So let me explain to you who goes to each of these schools.

They're not the same size. Virginia Tech is the biggest. William & Mary from a campus population would be the smallest UVA in the middle. So my brother went to UVA. The girl I dated, I dated her two years into college. Bad move, bad move. Yeah, it didn't work. But she went to UVA, okay?

UVA is the coolest of all three. I hate to say that shit, but it really is the truth. You ever been to UVA? No, but it seems pretty cool i mean there's a street called rugby road rugby road has good colors good mascot they've had they were great at sports they had a good reputation division one football there wasn't a shooting on campus from i can remember division one basketball they've got real shit and like it's legit academia it's very very good you know john th. So Thomas Jefferson graduated from William & Mary, and Thomas Jefferson founded UVA.

Okay? That's how it goes. But UVA is just much cooler. It's just much cooler. Whoa, Thomas Jefferson went to William & Mary? Yeah, he graduated from William & Mary. That's right. Damn, that's an old-class school.

Thomas Jefferson is, or William & Mary is the second-oldest college in America behind Harvard. Harvard is 1636. I think William & Mary is 1693. Damn. Yeah. 17th century, bitch. Phi Beta Kappa, like when you get 4.0 and everything,

was founded at William & Mary. That's the home of it. I wanted to go to William & Mary in fifth grade really bad because I went on vacation to Williamsburg and it was fucking awesome, bro. Yeah, but it's not awesome. I went on vacation three times

in the middle school years twice with my family once with a friend's family i mean did bush gardens water country usa luke the colonial bullshit right did all that great stuff all right here's the difference between william and mary and um and uva you want to hear it i'll make it fast super simple yeah uh the bitches because all you want is bitches. Big booty bitches, right? I don't know if there's many blacks and Latinas there who are my favorites, but I will say this. White girls can have that.

These days, they're coming around. But in all seriousness, here's the difference. Go to the trailer parks. Imagine you got a 1450 on the SAT out of 1600. I know the new one that changed the numbers. Did you get a 1450? I actually got higher than that but whoa whoa no hold on let's pause here the sats yeah you got higher than a

1500 barely but yes damn yeah 1510 that's your boy i'll just tip the cap to you what'd you get um i took it once it doesn't mean much by the way and i got a um i got in the low 1000 yeah and then they were like the guidance counselor was like okay you're probably nervous you know your grades are better than that you should take it a second time and then i told them i'm probably gonna go to community college so i don't really think i need to take it a second time here's my point it's a people high school, they think it's an IQ test. It's not. It's a scholastic aptitude test,

and I had no friends for the most part for most of my high school. All I did was study. The fact that I did well in it was not surprising or whatever. I mean, you ended up in MMA, though. You should have taken that shit to the top, right? Because your boy has inside of him a little bit of a savage you understand that went to the Marine Corps

in high school age 17 little bit of a savage so your Marine Corps is my factory town in a lot of ways dude we're more similar than you think

I keep fucking telling you this don't touch my nipples that's so weird Luke I keep telling you this we should kiss now it's normal I mean we're gonna end up

tip to tip this weekend only if we're family members what do I have to do to prove my love let's do let's do the fucking 23 and me if we're family we can touch dicks listen here's the point you asked about william and mary and uva for anyone who goes there to find out that you're actually part french canadian we could have been kissing this whole time this is what come in quadqua do. This is the – And honestly, we'll wrap up on this because we're going an hour and a half. William Murray and UVA, what's the difference? They're a two-hour support.

One's Williamburg. One has a legitimate athletic reputation. That's a huge difference. Dude, my senior year was 2002. That was the year of Shane Battier, Boozer, Jason Williams. Jason Williams was so good in Duke. Oh, my God. So they paid Duke to come play us.

And I'll never forget, I went to the game. They started all five of the major seniors at the time. And Dunleavy played for them as well. Oh, I love him. And they beat us 98 to like 42 after Dunleavy, Boozer, Battieriams sat after like five minutes chris carrowell their b team beat us by like double yeah but their b team were probably all americans two years yeah exactly my point being is this if you wanted real athletics you had to go to uva they had a real football program and everything else but what about frank beamer of v tech the

football coaches got that they had the extra skin there not so much here here but right here here's the difference. Did you ever meet the people in high school who were really smart but also wanted to go drink? Yeah, they all went to UConn. Versus the people who were really smart who just wanted to go back to the books. That's the difference between William & Mary and UVA.

They had the exact same scores, the exact same output, did just as well in life. But the ones who were like, you know what? I can get a 1450, whatever, on the SATs, and I want to go drink. I'm going to go to UVA. The ones who were fucking nerds went to William & Mary. So our version of William & Mary in Connecticut was like Quinnipiac or Fairfield University. I mean, Yale is there, but that's next level.

Something like that. Something like that. I had buddies who went on to other colleges for post-grad, and they were like, holy shit, bro. A buddy of mine got into Stanford Law, and he was like, you just can't believe what it's like on football nights. It's like a game-changing experience. Another buddy of mine went to Boston College. Same shit. Oh, yeah.

If I could do it over, I'd go to a legitimate power school. That was my big regret. If I could do it again, I would have gone to a school that had like big fucking athletics you know the only redeemable about a part about my really regrettable college run was um i was the the stay-at-home weekend dude who went to everyone's college so i was on a tour of all my best friends colleges every weekend stay for the whole weekend and so i you know i was a legend on many a campus i'm'm still banned for life. Legend, that's a strong word. Still banned for life in the dorms at Manhattan College in the Bronx. No, no, that is the Manhattan College is not a thing.

The Jaspers, baby. All right, well, that's been us. BC, why don't you tell the folks what's up? Look, this is the best show because here's the deal. You know what I'm saying? I mean, did AC and Daniel, Ariel and DC get drunk and do the show? They don't do that. They value their careers, okay?

We're willing to face F every single viewer, right? Look, right? You know what I mean? This is a big gift to people, Triple G, this week, okay? We're giving it to you. Our production crew, not giving it to you. We're giving it to you. So can you like this video? Can you subscribe? Can you tell your friends that they do it differently? They don't talk into microphones endlessly. They perform art. They are, they are,

are, are we are, what is art? I'm an artisan bread, right? I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm born and bred for art, okay? You know, Luke, artifacts, right? Artifice. We're fat. We're also really fat. Look, I'm so fat. That's why I'm wearing black this week, so you can't see my shelving, okay? I'm working on it, but I need time,

because right now I'm a shit show. It's a fucking disaster, but I'm working on it, but I need time because right now I'm a shit show. It's a fucking disaster, but I'm working on it. We'll see what happens. All right. So please, yeah, this is what we do at MK all day, nearly every day. Tip your waiters on the way out. And Saturday night after Connor, Dustin. Come be here, please.

Be here. All right? Be here. Come live. Come original. Okay? Everything you do, you got to come original okay everything you do you gotta come original Omaha style

yeah that's the shit we yeah you know 311 was paid but paid in weed only for like a strong portion of their early run I wish you had some weed

you motherfucker from Jersey City signing out my name hold on not just yet come original you got that

come original I'll entertain as come original come original you got to come original all entertainers come original nothing great you got to represent you got to come Got you. Nick Hexum. Right? He bangs. Here do I. Come original, there ain't nothing great. You got to represent, you got to come full S.A. Martinez on the 1s and 2s right there

I love that guy, right? Peanut on bass, come on Peanut could bang Chad Sexton on drums Timothy J. Mahoney on the guitar. Dude, these guys could get so much ass in the 90s. You think they banged Amber and that's how they found out the color of her energy? You just can't be normal, can you? Let's let's sign off all right that's brian campbell

i'm luke thomas thumbs up subscribe what else that's it bye vote buchanan not patrick