Mum's The Word! The Parenting Podcast - ALISON PERRY: Regaining Confidence & Raising Twins

Episode Date: July 13, 2025

This week, Georgia is joined by fellow mum and podcast host Alison Perry from Not Another Mummy Podcast for a refreshingly honest chat about the highs and lows of motherhood in your 40s.From regaining your confidence after kids, to navigating mental health while raising twins, they dive into the realities so many mums face but rarely talk about.Plus, Georgia and Alison reflect on how the "mumfluencer" space has changed over the years and share their thoughts (and fears!) about introducing smartphones and social media to their kids.It’s candid, comforting, and full of laughs, just what every mum needs in her ears.A Create Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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and today I am joined by the amazing Alison Perry. Alison is a writer, content creator, and podcaster. Starting a career working on teen mags like Bliss and More, one of my favorites, she launched Not Another Mummy blog in 2011 and then Not Another Mummy podcast in 2017. A mum of three girls, a 14 year old and six year old twins, day God. Alison is the author of OMG It's Twins. But most of her time now is spent creating content about losing and trying to regain her confidence

since hitting 40. So grab a cuppa, gets comfy, and let's jump in to a brand new episode of Mums The World. So Alison, thank you for joining us. Welcome. Hi Georgia. Hi. So I've given you a lovely little intro there,

but for anyone that doesn't know you and doesn't follow you, which they should. They should. How dare they not. What's wrong with them? How dare they? Just give us a little low down on you. Well, basically I am a writer and a content creator

and a mom and a podcaster. And at the moment, a lot of my content is about refinding my confidence that I have lost since turning 40 and trying to get out of the leggings and the sweatshirts and just really remember who I was before kids, but not even just that, who I am now, because that's a totally different person. And so between that and talking about parenting

and just life, yeah, it's just all part of the mix. If you follow Alison online, you will see that she dresses for pure joy. I do. Above everything. I feel like I tried to channel a bit of you today. I love it, you're wearing yellow. I'm wearing yellow,

because I am guilty of doing the leggings and baggy jumper. And I still do it now. If I am not going anywhere or doing anything, I do not get dressed. And it's a real easy pattern to fall into, isn't it? Of just not bothering. It is.

And I, since I've been really pushing myself to not even go shopping and buy loads of new things and spend loads of money, but just looking through my actual wardrobe and pulling out the sequin top to wear with my black dungarees I've already got. But since I've been doing that, I have been really pushing myself

to do it on the days when I'm just at home. So if I'm doing the school run and then I'm at my laptop and I'm working, I try really hard not to fall into the leggings and sweatshirt because it affects my mood so much. Does it? Do you find it does? 100%, 100%.

And it is that, it's a weird thing where it's almost like fake it till you make it. I was feeling rubbish six months ago and I had this realization that I needed to change the way that I was dressing and try and push myself in different ways. And it has completely changed the way that I feel. It has, it has boosted my confidence and boosted my mood and it just bonkers the difference it's made.

Pop my sequins on when I get home. Do it. Even if you're just doing the hoovering. Yeah. Bit of sequins honestly. It's amazing. So you're a mum of three girls, aren't you? Yes. So you've got, eldest is 14? 14, going on 19. Oh gosh, yeah. I'm waiting for that. Yeah, and then I've got six year old twins. Six year old twins, I mean, honestly,

when anyone says to me twins, I just recoil inside of like, how do you do it? I don't know how I do it Georgia, honestly. It's funny because I wrote a book about four years ago called OMG as Twins. So I think some people kind of see me as being a bit of a twin mom expert. She's got her stuff together,

she knows what she's doing, no. Oh my goodness. Like that book was basically me interviewing tons of experts, psychologists, doulas, midwives, psychotherapists. And it was like I was mining them for information to help me. And I put it all into a book and it's helping everyone else as well. But it just goes to show that I don't know what I'm doing. And who does? No. Who does know?

And you know, twins, even when they were toddlers, I would take them to the park. I would be scared to take them to the park on my own. I would avoid doing that. My husband has always been so much, he was a stay at home dad when they were a baby and toddlers. And he would just put them in the buggy and go to the park. And I was in awe because if ever it was a day that I had them, I would just be at home.

Let's play with Lego. Let's watch Peppa Pig. Because that's easier, because they're contained within an area, you know where they are. You don't need to. Take them to the park, and they run off in different directions. Or like one of them wants to go on the slide,

one of them wants to go on the swing, and it's like, I can't be in two places at once. Absolutely, do you know what, I even felt like that with one. I used to think, oh, it's just easier not to go out, so I'll just stay here. I mean, how you would manage with two, I do not know because I struggle. Also, when, is it Cooper yourself?

When Cooper was little, he's a year older than my twins, we had the pandemic, so we kind of had to stay in. Yes. Which made it harder in that way, but also it meant, oh, we can't go to the park, we're not allowed. The parks are closed, they actually are closed, it's not alive for once. Yes. Yeah. Yes. So we're not allowed. The parks are closed, they actually are closed, it's not alive for once. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. We're not lying to you kids.

So do you feel like there was a link to kind of your confidence, because obviously you've just said about how you lost it with the way you dressed and all those things, losing yourself. Yeah. Did you feel like there was a link with becoming mum and that, or did it start earlier?

Have you ever had it? This is like a therapy session. Yeah. Oh, always, always. Do you know what? I think anyone who knows me and has known me since my 20s would probably describe me as being a confident person. But looking back, I reckon I've done that thing

where I'm so kind of, my self-worth is so low and I'm constantly doubting myself and questioning myself and thinking, oh, I can't do that, that's not for me. That I have kind of overcompensated and become this kind of like, you know, funny, loud person. So at a party, I'm the one kind of telling the story, center of attention, but it really is like I'm masking this kind of feeling of insecurity.

And I would say that becoming a mum really knocked my confidence. And I remember when my eldest was little, I started a mum blog and I remember writing about this, like losing this, the sense of identity and not knowing who I was anymore. And really questioning myself, like, can I go into Topshop? As you know, we had Topshop back then. I was like 32, 33. Can I walk into Topshop? As you know, we had Topshop back then. Can I go, I was like 32, 33. Can I walk into Topshop and like buy something now? Yeah, well people look at me and go, she's too old to be. That's so funny, because I feel like I'm really

at that stage right now. I'm like, am I too old to wear this? Am I, should I not be wearing a like crop top as a nearly 40 mum? And it's funny, isn't it? You doubt yourself, but then when you really think about it, it's like, who cares? Who cares?

Who cares? Yeah, and no one's really looking at you and thinking anything bad, and if they are, let them. Yes, I don't, yeah. Who cares? Just let them get on with their judgmental day. But yeah, we say that having the twins and turning 40 and also hitting perimenopause,

which all of the kind of hormone shifts that go with that has really affected my confidence. And I gained a bit of weight and just like, your body just changes shape. And like there's this whole thing when you hit perimenopause that quite often people get a lot of weight around their middle. So I would find that outfits that perhaps like dresses

that I would normally put on and feel really good in, I had showed my tummy. And so I just felt really uncomfortable and just defaulted to black leggings, sweat shirts, hide myself away, comfortable and didn't realize actually how unhappy that in itself was making me until I had this realization last year.

Prior to all the children, you have birthed. Did you feel like you did dress kind of like bright and like a dopamine dressing prior to having children? Yeah, and actually about 10 years ago, so had my daughter in 2010, my eldest, and obviously I must have come out of that kind of initial confidence wobble. So I remember around about 2015, 2016,

I was blogging, I was putting on outfits, bright colored outfits, and going to East London with my friends, and we would take pictures of each other, next to bright walls, like street art. A pink door. A pink door. It was like the vibe 10 years ago.

And I was so embracing. I loved it. And I would put them on my blog and I put them on my Instagram. And so I definitely think that people associated bright colored clothing and happy fashion with me and just gradually just lost it and just felt like, oh, that's not me anymore. I can't do that. Isn't it mad how you kind of, you go into that spiral of thinking,

oh no, I can't, I couldn't possibly wear bright colors because what would people think of me or what would they say? And it just baffles me how we get to that point. But I do feel like as women, we're constantly having to adapt to our ever changing bodies because we're teenagers and then, and hit puberty, everything changes.

Then we become young women, changes again. Their mothers changes. I mean, I swear to God, my skeleton has completely changed since being a mom. My ribs and my hips. Your hips get wider, doesn't they? Yeah, they never went back to what they were. I don't care, I'm not bothered,

but it's just like all my bras stopped fitting round my ribs. I must have gone up, what's that size? The band size. The band size. And it just never went back down again. I'm have gone up, what's that size? The band size. The band size. And it just never went back down again. I'm like, oh, okay. Didn't know that was gonna happen. But it did.

Well, the day with your bra that you should get fitted every six months, which seems really excessive. It's quite excessive. But when you think about how much your body is changing, maybe once a year it's more realistic. Yeah. Who's got signs to go every six months?

And who's got the money just like, where I get a whole new set of bras every year. Yeah, yeah. Who's got time to go every six months? And who's got the money to just like, get a whole new set of bras every year? Yeah, yeah, I know. I know, well, God, all my bras, when I was pregnant and afterwards, I could wear as a hat now. I come out, well, I'm never gonna be fitting in them again. I think I've still got bras from before I became a mum.

Honestly, it's shameful. Yeah, but, because I wear like, I wear stretchy crop top because I've not really got boobs. And then, God, some of mine, you could, I mean, they could walk off by themselves, I think. I've had them that long. It's dire. When does fast grocery delivery through Instacart

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Service fees, exclusions, and terms apply. Instacart. Grocer groceries that over-deliver. So you were quite confident in your 20s, and then, you know, children, and you just lose you a little bit, don't you? At what point did you have your light bulb moment and go, do you know what? I'm gonna dress for me.

It was actually more of a work decision, which sounds like a weird thing to say, but I was having like a real, I mean, the confidence thing, yes, you know, a lot of it is to do with fashion and what I'm wearing, but it really bleeds over into my whole life. I always think of it as I was playing small. So there's a book by Tara Moore called Playing Big,

and it's all about playing big in your life and not being scared to do the big things and put yourself out there because it's safer to keep yourself small. So I have been doing that for the last few years, just playing it safe, not doing anything too big, not putting myself out there in a work or life capacity because I'm so lacking in confidence that, A, people will probably say no and laugh laughing my face and then I'll just feel worse about it. So I was chatting to my friend over coffee she's also a content creator and I was saying to her oh Emily I just feel like I don't know what I'm doing like on Instagram anymore and I don't really like the content I'm creating and I used to do like fashion

posts and I loved doing it but I can't do that anymore because all I wear is like leggings and a sweatshirt and so who wants to see that? I just wish I could you know wear fun bright clothing again and she was like well why don't you and why don't you create some content about that because there must be so many other people out there who are defaulting to the leggings and the sweatshirts and they're feeling a bit lacking in confidence and they don't know who they are anymore, maybe it'll help them as well. And I was like, actually, yes, okay, I can do it. And it was actually a really hard thing for me to do. I remember going to my wardrobe and like picking out the sequins and the bright colors and looking at it and thinking, can I? And I made a video and it actually got a huge response and it kind of snowballed from there.

And now I would say most days I get at least one message from someone saying, oh my goodness, thank you so much for your content, you're inspiring me. I bought a pair of pink shorts or I bought a blue cardigan or I bought a leopard print jacket and I love it and I've been wearing it on the school run and it makes me feel really good. I'm like, oh, I love this because quite selfishly

I am doing this for me, but I'm so glad that a knock on effect is I'm helping other people as well. That's not, yeah, I mean, the thing is we all do things for ourselves, like everybody does, but what's lovely is you do get to see the effects of, yeah, it makes you feel really good and you feel really happy, but also it's making other people, even if it's just one person a day, like job done.

Yeah, like completely. And also I get quite a lot of abuse from really weirdly, I've started guessing really horrible comments from women who look like they are 60, 70, 80 years old and who were just like being so mean about what I'm wearing. So I wore an outfit the other day, which was a gingham black and white gingham dress and a pink cardigan over the top and pink converse. And I felt amazing in it. And all of these women decided that I was from P

and that looked like I was kind of too old. Someone said, I'm 76 and I wouldn't wear that. It's like, well then that's your problem. I wanted to be like, thank God. Yeah, yeah. I don't want to dress like a 76 year old. That's not the aim here. That's not my vibe I'm going with, so good.

But I get all of this negativity, but it's almost worth it when actually what I'm doing, I'm doing it for me and I feel better and I'm helping all of these other women and so that makes it worth while. It's difficult because we've spoken about this so much on the pod with lots of different influences. It's really hard not to just focus on those negative comments.

So hard. And it's like you blinked, it's like it's all you can see. When somebody says something nasty, you're like, oh my God, is that what everybody thinks? It stays with you, doesn't it? Yeah, it sticks. It sticks there.

So you've got to condition your brain, haven't you, to try and go, but look at all the positive. Yes. Always gonna be people hating. And I think you've always got to remember, it's really easy for me to say, and I'm exactly the same, that we've always got to remember, it's really easy for me to say, and I'm exactly the same, that we've always got to remember

that it's just people that are unhappy with themselves. I bet that 76 year old woman wish she can wear a bit of color and have a dress how she wants to dress. But I bet she doesn't. I bet she sits in her leggings or whatever 76 year old women tend to wear. Yeah, beige slacks, I don't know. Yeah, a pleat, I don't know.

A pin of four, I don't know what my grandma used to wear. My mom was in her late 70s and she wears like nice navy trousers and a little striped jewels top. That's her vibe. Do you know what? If I can dress like my mom when I'm her age, because she's in her 70s, 75. And she is an absolute fashionista.

I mean, I'd say Virgin on potentially got a shopping problem. I hope dad's not listening. She doesn't dad, I promise. She doesn't buy something every day. It's all on vintage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all second hand. But she is such a style queen

and she's somebody that actually very similar to you of like, you know, just dressing for work, even if you sat at your laptop, you know, at home. My mom every day will get up, she will put an outfit on like matches, you know, and she'll wear jewelry that goes with it. And she will put her makeup on every day. Love it.

And just walk around her house. She doesn't, you know, all she's doing is walking around the house. She's all glam doing it. And also one of my best friends, very similar, she is very similar to you in the terms of dresses, like dog mean dressing. And I remember I had a conversation with her

and I was like, so you actually put like normal clothes on to do the school run. And she's like, yeah, I don't really have like gym kit that I would just wear to do the school run. And I was like, wow. So do you only wear gym kit on the school run? Oh, yeah. Ah.

I would never dress. I would never put normal clothes on. So is that because you get up, chuck clothes on, do the school run, then go home and get ready? No, I'll stay in that all day. Is it lit? I feel like I'm judging you here, but I'm not. No, no, I'm just, honestly, you're inspiring me.

Honestly, the amount of times people say to me, oh, you're off to the gym after this? And I'm like, no. You're just saying, yeah, yeah. Do I work? Yeah, bring to the gym. But it's so easy to fall into that rut, especially if you have a job where you work from home.

You don't go anywhere else. People must think I have like two outfits, which is black leggings or black leggings with two different hoodies. That's basically it. So funny, but you don't think about it sometimes. You don't think like what you could pair together. I almost feel like I want someone to come to my wardrobe

and just be like, let's do a styling session from what you've got. Because there's so much stuff in there that just sits there and doesn't ever come out of the wardrobe. And I'm one of those people that saves things for best. And then best never happens. This is why I'm just like, wear the sequins.

I've got like a little sequin jacket and I went to center parks with the school moms with like a weekend away. The kids didn't come, it was just the moms. And we were all in the lodge having dinner and I was wearing my sequin jacket. We're not even leaving the lodge. That's brilliant though.

That's where I feel like that's where confidence grows because you're just like, you know what, fuck it. I'll wear the sequins, who cares? Do you feel like when you reached 40, you almost went past the stage of caring anymore? I would say no. Of what people think, that I don't mean just about life in general.

Yeah, let's just. I just really don't care. Just don't care. I would say definitely in my 40s, I have got this kind of more chilled acceptance. I'm much quicker to talk myself round to the, oh, just do it and don't care what anyone else thinks. Whereas in my 30s, I was much more caught up in,

oh, you know, what people think of me and all of that stuff. And also just a bit less kind of, I'm so much more chilled in terms of, I don't get involved in the conversation. So whether it's on the WhatsApp group or whether it's some conversation that I see online, some argument, and I'm just like, I'm just going to take a step back from that.

Drama is just pointless. You don't have to get involved. Whereas in my 20s and 30s, I was all about the drama. I was like, bring it on. I want to tell you my opinion on everything. I wrote blog posts that were really controversial. They weren't really, but I felt like they were. Yeah, you felt like they were, yeah. And now I'm just like, just chill. Do you have an insatiable fascination with the paranormal? Are you ready to dive headfirst into the eerie realms of the unexplained?

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waters of the supernatural, Paranormal Activity with me, Yvette Fielding, is your ultimate destination. Will you dare to join me? Listen to Paranormal Activity with me, Yvette Fielding, wherever you get your podcasts from. So if people don't know, Alison, you worked on magazines like More and Bliss, which were literally like my holy Bible back in the day, as well, especially because I feel like More and Bliss was slightly more risky. They were like, oh, sex position of the week. More was, yeah, we have position of the fortnight, position of the week.

Oh, fortnight, yeah. And I was literally like, these are my type, rather than girl talk. Yes. You have a girl talk. Yeah. So, yeah, they were a little bit more grown up, weren't they? Coming into your later teenage, like later teenagers. But obviously, so you've gone from girl magazines, and that was all we had really to be in touch with the world, to then obviously now,

the world of social media, and everything's changed. How do you feel about like that shift, that progression? It's interesting, isn't it? Because you're right, when we were teenagers, I mean, I'm a bit older than you, but magazines were all we had. There was no internet when I was a teenager. No, there was no internet when I was younger.

So our support system was these magazines that we were reading and the advice and the agony ants. It was amazing. And then when I became a mom, I remember feeling like no one told me how hard this was going to be. And I started my parenting blog, my mom blog when I was on maternity leave. I worked at Moore magazine at the time and I took a year off. And partly I started it because I was kind of gone from working in this buzzy magazine office where Peter Andre was popping in to see us all.

And, you know, it was all like really exciting. We go to the pub in Soho after, you know, after drinks. And I needed something to keep my brain going. But also I felt like I want to anything that I'm learning about being a new mom, I want to pass on to try and help other people. Yeah. And now, of course, blogging is pretty much dead, down to death. And now it's much more social media based. And it of course blogging is pretty much dead, died a death and now it's much more social media based. And it's really interesting that I feel like my whole career has been

one way or another creating content to help teenagers, mums and now slightly kind of older mums who have lost their identity and need a bit of guidance on the fashion side of things. So yeah, it's just, it's all part of the same thing. So you've almost progressed with it, haven't you, really, I suppose? Totally. And grown up with it. Yeah.

Just grown up alongside it. Yeah. And yeah, I feel really similar to you in that sense. I felt the same of like, why hasn't anyone told me that this is hard? Why hasn't anyone told me that this might happen or this might happen or you might not feel this way or you might feel this way.

Which again is why I, cause I kind of started really on Instagram. And that's why I did it as well because I felt like a problem shared is a problem halved. Right? And like occasionally people would be like, oh, you share too much of your life. I'm like, but why?

You know, the bits I'm sharing, the bits about what I've found difficult are only being shared to help, not to scare or put people off. It's hard though, isn't it? Because I do remember, like back when I started blogging, it was very much like cookie cutter, moms wearing aprons, stay at home moms who were blogging,

and it was all very much like crafts that you can do with your kids. And then the tide turned and then in the mid 2015, this kind of like new wave of parent bloggers came along. So like scummy mummies and her raffraging and the un-momsy mom who were suddenly like, hang on a minute, it's not all picture perfect, like Rosie, so easy to raise these kids, it's not all blissful moments. Here's the reality of what we're doing. And then there was a big backlash towards them because it was like, you're putting moms off

and it's just all about negativity and why did you become a mom if you don't enjoy it? And it's like, one extreme. That's not what we're saying, is it? But it's also one extreme to the other and it's like, one extreme. That's not what we're saying, is it? But it's also one extreme to the other. And it's like, maybe most people's truth and experience is somewhere in between. Like you do have the nice moments

where you're crafting with your kid and feeling like, oh, this is so lovely. But then also you have moments where you want to tear your hair out and you're like, oh, this is so hard. Yeah, yeah, craft, called crafting. Crafting with kids is hard. I saw someone, I heard a story the other day, this isn't to do with parenting at all,

but it's to do with glitter, which I think is a huge part of parenting, probably more so for you with being a girl mom. But someone to get back at their ex had put pots of glitter on a ceiling fan. So when they turned it on, that glitter just went everywhere. Could you imagine?

That's gonna be like years of finding glitter. I don't think that would ever, you would have to do a full house renovation to get rid of that glitter, I think. That's hilarious. I know, isn't it brilliant? Yeah. That I don't condone people doing things like that.

No one do that. But you know. No one do it, it's Georgia told me. If someone has really pissed you off there, a bottle of glitter. So yeah, so you've obviously gone through that change and then we've touched on the fact that you are a mum of twins

and obviously you're eldest daughter as well. When you had the twins, how did you navigate that? Did you kind of take to it quite naturally once you'd got over the shock of two? Or has it been a journey? I would say that I've only just in the last year relaxed into having twins. Right, so six years in.

Yeah, have you seen that social media kind of meme that's gone around where it's like comparing mums to flamingos who lose their pink? Yes, yeah. So flamingos, when their new parents, new mums, the female flamingos lose their pink and then it gradually comes back. And I feel like in the last year, my pink has returned.

Which ties into the whole confidence returning and trying to really find myself with style, but definitely is about parenting and feeling like I'm confident enough now that I could take both of my girls into London on the train by myself and not absolutely lose my shit. And I would probably still feel really anxious doing it. I'm really worried that something's gonna go wrong

or one of them's gonna have like a massive tantrum because this is it, right? Five year olds and six year olds still have tantrums. You think when you're perhaps past that stage, you might forget or when you've got younger kids, you might think, oh, by the time they're that age, then it'll be all plain sailing. But my kids still have like big feelings.

And if you're out in public and one of them is struggling with something, then that's quite, I find that really hard. And I get really panicky and I'm like, everyone's looking at me and everyone's judging me and what do I do? And ooh, you know. And so I would say only in the last year,

how do I feel like, oh, okay, no, this is okay. We can do this. I can do things with them. Or even just, I can spend a whole day with them at home. This sounds absolutely ridiculous. But I really feel like two, three years ago, if my husband had said, right, I'm off out to with the lads, we're going to go off to the rugby for the day, and you're going to be here all day with the kids, I

would do it. But from the moment he told me until after it had happened, I would be feeling really anxious and really worried about it, and will it be okay, and will I cope with everything that the day through is at me, and will I manage to entertain them for the day? And now I'm like, oh no, that'll be all right, we can, we'll do it.

So I'm just a self doubt, isn't it? You're, and I think that's what a lot of us women as mothers do is almost like second guess it before it's happened. So we catastrophize it and we're like, oh God, but what if, what if, you know, one of the girls is sick on that day and then I'm gonna have to try and navigate a sick child

and a well child and then what if they're gonna have a tantrum and what if they, and you catastrophize it. And it's so easy to do. It really is. It's so easy to do as a mother of little children, especially when they have big feelings. Cooper, when he is tired, his feelings are big, really big. And I'm like, the worst thing you can say to them is,

are you tired? Are you tired? My husband has the worst thing where, I mean, it's so, it's coming from a place of love, but he quite often says to them, and me sometimes, are you feeling okay? Because it's like, he thinks that maybe you're a bit poorly and you just haven't realized it yet, and that's why you're being such a dick.

Love it. And I keep meaning things to him, not in the moment, because that's the worst thing I can do to him is in the moment, kind of like analyze why he's saying something. But I keep meaning things to him. You know, when you say that, it's like you're invalidating the thing that they're really upset about. Yeah. But annoyingly, he said it to one of my twins the other day and she was like, actually yeah,

I've got a bit of a headache. And I was like, damn it. Was he like, see, see, the question works. Damn it, get the cow pole. Okay, let's get the cow pole. So annoying. I know, it's always the girl thing, isn't it? A bit under the weather, let's get the cow pole.

Cow pole. One of my twins this morning was a bit like, oh, I'm feeling a little bit, you know, a bit poorly. That's what's really difficult as well, because especially when it's like the first day back at school, you're like, are you really feeling unwell?

Like how unwell are we talking here? Because is it unwell because you feel a bit nervous? Yeah. Because I don't know if your children are the same, but Cooper sometimes confuses nerves with feeling sick. Yeah, because that's, because it is a bit of a-

Butterflies in your tummy, absolutely. All the time they're like, oh, my tummy's sore. And then when you drill down a little bit, it's like, actually you're feeling a little bit excited or a little bit nervous. Let's just talk through the day on what's gonna happen and see if that feeling goes away. Yeah, and it normally, I've started saying to Cooper,

is it like that butterflyy nervous feeling? And I think now, cause he's seven, he can kind of like logically understand what I'm saying. And they remember. Yeah, and then, cause he used to do it before he went, cause he got into like go-karting, but cause he was so excited slash potentially a bit nervous about going.

Every journey he'd get, I mean, he does get car sick anyway, but he'd get really car sick. But I think it was, honestly think it was part nerve and excitement, because as soon as we got there, it was like a different child. It suddenly appeared out of nowhere. We're close to the end, but I did want to ask you a question about,

in terms of being a being a girl mom, and obviously you've worked with magazines for girls and in social media and all that side of things, do you feel confident bringing your girls up in a world, this world that we're living in right now? Have you watched- Adolescents. Yeah, I haven't actually.

Oh, you need to watch it. I'm not sure I was ready. Not sure I was mentally ready to watch something about social media that might scare me, but that's just me being a baby, isn't it? I felt the same as you because it had been out for about a week when I watched it and I was a bit like, oh, I don't know if I want to watch this.

Well, I'm so glad I did. It's really, yeah. It's not like, it's unsettling, but it's worth it. It's worth watching. Almost better to watch than not to. Oh, a hundred percent, a hundred percent. I'm quite strict. I'm quite a strict mom when it comes to social media.

So I really held off letting my eldest on any social media platforms. So she's 14 now. She's on like TikTok and Snapchat and Instagram, but it's all locked down and all kind of like parental controls really strict. And she's not allowed to have her phone in her bedroom at any point or any device,

which she is constantly petitioning to get that changed. And I'm like, no, no, no. Because I know that of a weekend, if she was waking up, she would reach for her phone or her iPad and she would start watching things and scrolling and we'd never see her. No. Especially because she's a teenager as well you know that is just what they don't

come out the rooms much anyway but and also think of us we do it we can stop ourselves from doing it. We have self control. But do we? Do we stop ourselves? No. So imagine what a 14 year old child's going to be like. There will be zero self control there. And I've actually got a meeting with my kids, my younger kids primary school this week. I thought you were going to say weekly kids. No, I've got a meeting with my kids. No, with the primary school to discuss their phone

policy and I think they're thinking about changing it from September that no one, even like the older year kids can't bring smartphones into the school. So I'm going with some other parents to have a meeting with them to try and encourage that real change to happen. Because I really want my younger to not to just be handed a smartphone. And I know that sounds like I'm being really passive. Like it wasn't my fault that my eldest got handed a smartphone when she was in year six. Like of course it was our decision, but it's such a hard decision to make when everybody else is handing their child a smartphone. Oh my gosh, I had that issue not that long ago

and Cooper was around a couple of young lads. One of them was the same age as Cooper and he's only seven. The other one was maybe a couple of years older. They both had smartphones and Cooper was like, mommy, he's the same age as me, why can't I have one? And I sat there, I was like, because you're too young. And then I didn't wanna sound like a dick in front of the other parents being like, you know,

because obviously in my head, I'm like, you're too young for a phone. You should not be having a phone. But I didn't wanna put down the other parenting styles. Cause like, you know, each to their own, if that's what you wanna do. That's awkward. But you've really got to fight.

And sometimes you do worry that you're gonna come across to your kid like you're a, you know, a boring parent that doesn't let them do anything. But, and they are never going to understand until they get to like our age, we did that for you. Exactly. It was for you. Exactly. It was for you and your mental health and your safety and all those sorts of things.

I think my eldest is starting to understand. But she said to me the other week we were chatting about it and she said, Oh, mom, you know, I just wish that smartphones and social media didn't exist for anyone my age. You know, I don't want to be the only one who hasn't got it. But I just wish it was like when you were a kid and you would walk around to your friend's house and ring on their doorbell and ask if they were around and wanted to hang out,

but instead it's all done on like Snapchat and social media. That's so sad, isn't it? Because we were the same, you bike around to your friend's house or you call the house phone, speak to the parent. Hi Mrs. Richmond, it's Catherine. And so you'd actually also have that interaction

with adults as well. And I feel like that's where a lot of kids from our era had a lot of respect for elders. Cause you did have to have that constant, you know, speaking to elders all the time because you'd call for your friend. And you couldn't just go, yeah, exactly.

And not speak to them. I mean, it's nice that your daughter's kind of picked up on that. I feel sad in a way that they don't have that innocence of childhood. Would you let her watch Adolescents? I actually started watching, the same night that we had that conversation,

I said to her, look, let's start watching this. But after about 20 minutes, she got quite bored because it is quite, the way it's shot, you haven't seen it, but it's quite, because it's all done in one shot, it's all in real time each episode. And so there is quite a lot of stuff happening. It's not as pacey as other dramas and things.

Or as a program that a child would watch. Exactly, exactly. But I think I might try again with her and sit with her and watch it and chat to her about it. Cause I think it is an important one for like, you know, older, I wouldn't say kind of tweens and younger teens, but older kids definitely. Okay, right.

Well, I'm definitely gonna watch that. It's on my list. It's on my list. And very lastly, this is going off on a slight tangent. What advice would you give to anyone that's expecting or has just given birth to twins? Any one bit of advice? Oh my goodness, accept all the help that is offered you

because I was quite bad at just being like, oh no, no, don't worry, don't worry. It's all good. I'm just, we're fine. Anyone who offers to cook you a lasagna, anyone who says to you, oh no, no, don't worry, don't worry. It's all good. I'm just, we're fine. Anyone who offers to cook you a lasagna, anyone who says to you, oh, well come round and clean, or hold the babies while you go and have a nap or anything, just be like, yes, that'd be fantastic, thank you. Yeah, always accept the help.

Always accept the help. Because people genuinely want to help. And so actually you're doing a nice thing for them as well because they're going to get that buzz of like, you know, helping you out. Exactly. Like that episode of Friends where Phoebe's trying to do a good deed but without... Yeah, there's no true good deed. They're all selfish. Yeah, yeah. Everyone's going to feel good for it. That's fine. That's fine. Alison, it's been an absolute pleasure talking to you. Thank you so much for coming on the pod. Oh, thank you, Georgia.

It's been so good. That's a wrap on another episode of Mums the Word. Thank you so much for joining us today as we were joined by the amazing Alison Perry. Don't forget to leave us a review, follow us on socials at at mums the word underscore pod and subscribe to our YouTube channel. Just search for Mums the Word. Until next time, I'm Georgia channel just search for Mums the Word.

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