Mum's The Word! The Parenting Podcast - 'It's Not Screen Time, It's Screen Use' | Tom Le Tissier, Head of Alleyn's Regent's Park, on the 11+, iPads & Helping Children Find Their Thing

Episode Date: July 26, 2026

This week Georgia Jones and Kelsey Parker are joined by Tom Le Tissier, Head of Alleyn's Regent's Park, for a chat about school choices, screens and what actually makes children thrive, and yes, it's his very first podcast.Tom explains the 11+ properly (Georgia had to Google it that morning), why more families are looking for a route around it, and how quickly children soak up their parents' panic.Then it goes deeper: the difference between screen time and screen use, why an iPad should just be "an extension of the pencil case," and how we've got more protective in the real world at exactly the moment we should be loosening the reins. Plus teaching children to fail well, why the best athletes and musicians specialise late, and his top five things he wishes parents understood about school.Kelsey opens up about how her daughter Aurelia was held after losing Phoenix, Georgia shares the maths teacher who put her off numbers for life, and Tom confesses to sprinting flat out in an inflatable shark costume while every other teacher was just having a laugh.Grab a cuppa and get comfy.Alleyn's Regent's Park is a co-educational preparatory school for children aged 3 to 11, offering an inspiring and joyful education in the heart of North London.Set moments from Regent's Park and London Zoo, we combine 400 years of educational tradition with the creativity and forward-thinking approach children need to thrive.https://www.alleyns-regentspark.org.uk/A Create Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, hello, we're back, people. Welcome to a brand new episode of Mums the Word. I'm Georgia Jones. And I'm Kelsey Parker. Do we have an episode in store for you today? We have a very special guest joining us. He's head of Allen's Regent Park, a gorgeous little prep school right by London Zoo. He's been a teacher since 2014 and a head teacher since 2021.

He's all about helping children, finding their thing and becoming. all they can be. He's got proper thoughts on screen time versus screen use. And he's passionate about co-ed and creating a warm nurturing place to learn. Please welcome Tom Letisier. Grab a cupper. Get comfy. And let's jump into a brand new episode of Mums the Word. Tom, welcome to the show. Welcome. Thank you for having me. How are you feeling, Tom? Yeah, it's going to be a breeze, I'm sure, my first ever podcast. So, Tom says he feels quite nervous, but I feel quite nervous because I'm sat next to a head teacher. But also, I'm like, you have to get up in front of parents.

Like, surely, yeah, there's children I wouldn't be nervous about, but actually having to give, like, when you're doing a presentation in front of the parents, like, they are the most savage people in the whole entire world. Like, surely that is way more scary than this. I mean, thankfully, I don't see the sort of debrief in the WhatsApp groups after I speak. So to my face, no, I'm joking, they are a very kind audience. In fact, just last week, we had our celebration day, which is kind of our big speeches, prizes, etc. So that was fine.

I'm confident in a room full of people and assembly type set up. Do you try and make by little jokes when you get up? Yes. Do you write them ahead of time? Yeah. And I opened up. There's some ad-libbing sometimes. In fact, the one that I ad-lib was not successful.

So, but I knew it wasn't going to be successful and made a joke out of the fact that it was a poor joke. One person laughed. It was my deputy head. It was like he was contracted to him, so it was fine. But made a joke out of that. He just gave you more support. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Is that funny?

Was it a pity laugh? Yes, absolutely. And I recognised it. I may even said thanks, mum to tell me. But you know what? Even when I'm sitting there, I'm waiting to hear the jokes from the teachers and the head. I'm like, come on, I want some good content here. There has to be something.

I need something. Oh, God. And we did, last week, we had prize giving. So we had 9 o'clock for my son and then back at two. And I was a bit upset that. the speeches were repeated. I was like, I needed, I needed new content. Oh, you wanted new material.

Yeah, they need to think about the siblings, don't they? Yeah, it's like, come on. And some of the parents have to go through like the nine, the two, the next day. They were back at nine o'clock. I was like, well, you need to come on, we've got, we need some new stuff. New stuff. Remember that, Tom. Yeah.

Yeah, I remember. If I have to split speeches. Kelsey's here for the advice. This is just going to be us giving a head to advice. I'll make some notes. So, Tom, I feel like I should call you. Don't call me Miss Liturcio So you are headteacher of Allens

Yes, Allens Regents Park I mean me and Kelsey just had a real struggle There are many many different versions But Allain's Regents Park So we're all different accents as well So they're all laughing at me I'm like yeah I'm common I'm sure you said Alan Moore

Alex Jack's why you're laughing for He's Welsh Yeah you haven't even done opinion There was a lot of regional accents going on at one point. So you're right next to London Zoo. Yes, we are. It's very exciting.

Do you ever do like school trips there? Yeah, absolutely. In fact, we build into our curriculum. Do you? Yeah, we do. So we go for science lessons over to the zoo, whether it's, I think in year five, they do a conservation project. So they'll go over there learn from the experts

or in year four they study adaptation and what's better than actually going to see the camels and how they've adapted to their environment than just. reading about it in textbook. So we're very, very lucky to be there. Beats Cooper's Steam and Water Museum any day, actually. That was nice. It was fun. So tell us a bit about about the school then. So this school has a history going back to 1619. Yes. So Edward Allens, the founder, who was an actor, who was an entrepreneur, who was a businessman, built this, created this school for 12 poorly scholars. So it was,

set up out of a sort of charitable foundation to give families who may not have had an opportunity for education, to have that education. But actually, Edward Allain, he, have you seen Shakespeare in Love? Now, random tangent to make there. That's not what I thought I'm going to say. I've not seen it, but I've been told that Ben Affleck played Ned Alleyn in that film. And so, yeah, so he, of his time, he was a huge actor, he was incredibly well known. But actually, he was much more than that.

that he was a businessman. The businesses he set up, considering the time, I'll probably only refer to the schools. His attitude towards learning that it's much more than education, that it's providing opportunity to all, and that is echoed still today in everything that we do. That idea of giving children opportunities, that it's not just a straight line of education,

it's giving children the ability to find their thing. You can only excel at something that you've experienced. So it's so important that children can experience as breadth of range of activities, lessons as possible. And again, that's echoed in our education. And I think for me, obviously, I've made the choice to put my children in an independent school. And I think that was a massive draw because there is more opportunity. And they get to have a go where everything can then go, right, that's something that I want to do. Whereas sometimes in state schools, obviously everyone has to do the same thing.

and if it's not your thing, you're still doing that thing. But there's so many opportunities. Yeah, absolutely. And we have an all-in program which incorporates our co-curricular, our off-school clubs, our sporting opportunities, our trips abroad. We average six or seven after school clubs every day. We have, in fact, right now back at school, we have a theatre production who are working through the school

as a holiday camp. We have choirs, folk groups, orchestras, all of these different things that run throughout the day. And it's just giving that extra to a child's education. And it's making sure they have as many opportunities. The world that they're going to go into, we know, is going to be hugely different from the moment we're in now. All that we do know about the future is that we don't quite know what it's going to look like. Oh, we know about this future is we don't know about the future. Yeah, which in itself is quite scary, but it gives us the responsibility.

Everyone knows that they've got paid tax. That's something we do that. Well, yeah, we know there will be, well, yeah, quite a hot topic. Yeah. We're all skin. The skills that children will need will change. But the people who they are, their character, that won't change. AI will take many jobs away, but actually to be the best version of themselves,

to be the best human beings they can be, that won't be something that AI can take away. So that's part of our role, is their character development of, yeah, being set up to thrive in that future. That's really cool. How do you do that? What learning's... Yeah, so we have a... What teaching you do that? So we have a new...

Well, it's new to us. We have a strand, all Alleynes schools have a strand in their curriculum called the AIQ, which is the Allain's Intelligence Quotient. AI is slightly misleading in there. It features slightly, but actually it's really about preparing... children to thrive in the rapidly evolving world. It's innovation with purpose. It's set, all lessons in our school are set in the All Studio, which looks like a class from the future. It's got an amphitheatre style seating. It's got a 3D printer, laser cutting, all of this really cool stuff that children will be able to do. But actually, it's what the children are doing,

which is the most exciting thing. So I, a few weeks ago, I popped into a year six lesson, where Victoria holding a screwdriver in one hand, her drone that she'd been building the other, celebrating, that she's, I've just managed to mount my first engine, whatever it was. And just, just, so this was a year six child. And just that, that pure excitement from that. And that in itself is amazing. And then I went and spoke to another child,

and they explained why they're building drones. Fun in education is so important. And that, that building that passion. but actually to have connection for children to be able to make connections is even more important for their development for the future. This other child and said, oh yeah, we're looking at the UN Sustainable Development Goals, and they linked it to how these drones could be used for early detection of forest fires. They could be used to help to support the environment. So it's this physical skill, practical skills, the fun, the enjoyment, the passion, but actually linking it to,

they can be linking back to Edward Allens actually, who was a change maker of his time, these children are being set up to be change makers of their time. Can Joach join the school? She's about it. I think I might need to go about school. Can I come, please? I think funny.

So, like, having fun within education is so important. Oh, I do, yeah, absolutely. And I think as well, for me and Kelsey, because both mine and Kelsey's husbands, Tom sadly passed away, but both our husbands were musicians. And me and Kelsey are quite, well, we're creatives as well, really, aren't we? So we kind of, well, I definitely felt like, for me, school was difficult

because it was very much math, English, science, P.A. And I wasn't good at any of them. And I was like, I don't know where, I don't know what my path is here. And it was only when I left school that I found what I actually enjoyed doing. But for like your saying, you're going down different routes of what children actually really need, what they enjoy, what sets them a light. Yeah, and having a genuinely holistic education should never be at the cost of any part of it.

So yes, the maths, the English, the academic subjects, that will be a school's, it should be a school's bread and butter that they do excellently. Yeah. But for some it will be, that focus will be at the cost of their performing arts, of their creative arts. And actually, I believe quite strongly that giving this genuine holistic approach, encouraging children to be creative to follow their passions, or actually not even follow their passions, learn what their passions might be,

will have a positive effect on their academics if that's what's important to a family. And it's giving those opportunities, those choices, that the direction that a child will choose, their family will choose, is based on all of the facts, everything they have, all the opportunities they've had. And education for young children in particular is so, kind of to your point, it's built on confidence so much.

So if a child is going from lesson to lesson, feeling like they're not good at anything, then it's just going to be so detrimental. They need to have that fun, that joy of learning. I think they need the release as well. Yeah. And so I was fortunate. I actually went to perform in art school when I was 11 and it was the best thing my parents ever did, or my mum ever did,

because again, half the day was split. So yes, okay, they did focus on the academic, but I always knew that by the afternoon I could sing dance and act and be okay, whereas I think if I'd actually gone to a normal secondary school, I probably would have been expelled because I actually couldn't just sit there. What was you saying is she was a naughty? Yeah, I was naughty, but obviously with being Italian country, they embraced it.

They're like, we like the naughtiness because actually that, that's who you are as a person. Like, I couldn't just sit still. Like, that's not me. We prepare our children for 11 plus. We also have the opportunity of our children having an assured place into our senior school in Hampstead as of this September coming. But again, even that excellent, that excellent, which can be really intense, it's never at the cost of, oh, we'll stop doing after school clubs because you're doing 11 plus preparation. In fact, I'm always incredibly proud to say,

So we will have around March time our year five and six production. Those year sixes have just sat entrance exams for 11 plus. Some schools will only do maths, English, verbal reasoning, nonverbal reasoning. But you can find the time for them to do other elements of the curriculum, whether it is chess club, whether it's science, whether it's performing arts. But the fact that our year sixes have the leading roles in whatever we've just done, Matilda, it shows that, yeah, again, the, that 11 plus journey is not at the cost of who they are.

We want our children to discover who they are, and that's so important. So 11 plus, I need to be educated on 11 plus. A lot of pressure on children. I don't know what, I don't really know what 11 plus is because I went to just a standard primary, secondary, air levels, 6'4. Did you just not do 11 plus? No, none of us did. No, it wasn't a thing. It wasn't a thing when I was. Is it a thing up north? Do they do?

They do. They used to because I know my mum and dad did 11 plus and went to like grammar school or whatever it was. But for us, there was none of that. Maybe your parents just looked to. I actually, do you know. I actually, I did. Get lost. I actually went on chat. G50 this morning to find out what 11 plus was. So please, please everyone talks about 11 plus. I'm like, Array is going into year three and I feel the pressure. She won't be doing 11 plus. Let Tom explain to me what 11 plus is. I still don't know what it is. I mean, to be fair, in your defence, we have families who have been through the 11 plus plenty of times and we are still there to support them, talk them through that process of what 11 plus means

because it is a high pressure, sometimes anxiety-inducing process. So there are certain schools, senior schools, in order to gain entry into them, children will sit the 11-plus, and schools based on those children who have applied their results combined with references and interviews, they will offer places based on that exam,

or series of exams and interviews. But basically, if you want Cooper to do it, you need to start now if you're going to do 11 plus. What do you mean start now? Start getting your tutors in place, that's it. Get them in place, get them chewaters, you know. He just gives me severe panic because all my friends were actually, well, I would probably say a little bit more intelligent than me.

And I would have then gone into absolute deep panic that they were going to get into one school and I was just going to be in the other one. It does bring panic. And that's part of our roles of school. We're preparing the children, but we're supporting the whole family because as soon as a parent is panicking or anxious,

their child will be a sponge and we'll just soak up. Absolutely. Absolutely. So we make sure we speak to parents as early on as they want to engage about it. We actually start the preparation, the big meetings, sort of end of year four into year five. And then we offer one-to-one meetings, and that will be either with me or ahead of future schools, and they will have a point of contact for the whole process.

But we also offer this route through to our senior school. I think more and more there are families who are looking because of the stress that 11 plus brings. They're looking for ways, how can I avoid the 11 plus? That's not for all families. I believe that we offer the best of both worlds where we have that assured route through to an excellent senior school in Allens Hampstead. But for some families, it will be that whether it's through tradition,

the school that they went to, or they're looking for a single sex school, or they're looking for something outside of London, that 11 plus will be the right route. So at the secondary school that's connected to yours, if you didn't go to the prep, they would have to sit the 11 plus to get into. That's right. So if you join Allings Regents Park, either from next year, from three-year-olds, all the way through to Year 6,

we have an admissions process. So there are examinations to join. But if a family is successful at joining into our school, that will give them an assured place going through into our senior school. With private schools, is there catchment areas or not? Anyone can apply? Yeah, anyone can apply. Right. Yeah. The private school world, I think he's just like, I've just really had my eyes open to it because it just actually blows my mind to the whole thing of being in it. How did you find the process of selecting a school for your children? What were you looking at?

I actually didn't really go and look at any other school. I only looked at the school that the children are at. My friends were going. Tom, my partner, always, that was always his dream for the kids. to go to a private school. Was it? Tom's a dream. Oh, that's why I had a lot of pressure on me to do this. Our husbands went to the same school back in... Yeah, they went to the same secondary school.

Well, Bromley Cross, didn't they? Yeah. And which was, I mean, it was just a state school. Yeah, but that was Tom's dream. So I did reception with Aralia at a state school, and it just wasn't... I don't think it was right for either of us. And also, my little boy, Bodie, is very... He needs to be nurtured. and I felt that being in a class with 35 children, 33 children would just be way too much for him.

So I just went to this one school and then I fell in love. But then when I went to the school, a lot of these private schools, everyone just jumps around and goes to different schools. Like for me, that just blew my mind. Like a lot of people in year three, they go to. Yeah, and I think that where that can be avoided, children will be resilient. they will make new friends quickly and often even when I moved my boys from their nursery, I felt, I think, attached to their nursery, but they were fine. Within a couple of days, they were absolutely fine.

But obviously, I think moving too frequently is something that if that's what the system is creating, that kind of bouncing about to get to that end goal school, there's something slightly wrong with that system or potentially and maybe not having. The fact that people are just pain, so they think, oh, okay, if I'm paying, then... Is there something better? Because they're always looking for value for money. I think that we have to be aware of that for families. It's an incredible amount of money that families are parting with.

So that's my responsibility is to ensure that those fees represent value for money. And of course, if families feel like it's not represented, they will look elsewhere. Because you do that in all with a lot of things in life, don't you? Yeah, of course you do. Phone contracts. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, you shop around. You don't get what you want, then you shop around.

Yeah. I couldn't be any more happy with the school that I've chosen to the children. I think that they're really nurtured and they looked after. I think that's what's lovely about schools like yours, Tom, is that they really care about the children. I feel like the problem is sometimes with certain schools is, and I feel like this is very much in the NHS as well. Don't get me started.

It's not. Is that people are just there. to do the job and get it done and go, rather than caring. And I think that's really important the level of caring, especially nowadays with children and, you know, the rising in, or not even the rise, the awareness of, you know, children having ADHD or autism or, you know, neurodivergent children. And also mental health.

Like this is a huge thing now of us looking at kids and how, they're coping. Yeah. And does your school have anything in place for? Yeah, absolutely. So again, we have the AIQ, which is more the academic, the curriculum or that side of the curriculum. We have the AEQ, which is the Allain's emotional quotient.

Oh. And this comes out of my favorite room in the school. It's called the well. It kind of feels like a well-being centre, sort of tranquil music playing in the background. There's a sort of tree house with a reading. nook and it's just an amazing space I haven't seen anything similar to it in in other schools but the most important part of this is the people who work in there so we have our school nurse base in there we have a school counselor we have our educational welfare officer and all these people ensure that

that no children will will slip through the net they are it's incredibly proactive past oral care ensuring that children feel seen and heard and that's that's that's so so important and that children have that sense of belonging. And also the understanding that behaviour, managing emotions, these things aren't just, I think it's not that long ago that it was just, oh, they will be picked up. But these are things that have to be taught. And that is the centre for where our youngest children will be taught about regulation, will be modelled how to interact with their peers. And this all comes from a very deliberate part of our curriculum that, as I said, out of the well. Which is important because I think

a lot of the, well, growing up, anyone that had any form of like neurodivergency or actually had problems at home or, you know, mental health problems, their issues, they were just deemed as the naughty kid or

the, you know, the learner or, you know, and they got a label straight away which was, and then like we were saying before, weren't we, as soon as that child's got that label, naughty kid, they then play up to being the naughty kid. Kelsey was saying about that, weren't you?

So that is important. That's incredible. So do your children, do your children at your school, if they're having a hard time or if they're struggling with their emotions, do they then go there? Yeah, they have the opportunity to go and speak to one of our team in there just to be able to either, for the older children, they may be able to take themselves there to talk.

But we also have timetabled lessons in there, but they will have those adults. they know they can go and speak to and have that time. We have Coral Cove, and when we lost Phoenix, Aurelia spent a lot of time in Coral Cove. Right. I don't know whether that was out of her choice, but I think she felt like that was her safe place. They really looked after her and nurtured her and went through her emotions and feelings. She was very vocal.

So she told, actually, when we lost Phoenix, I actually had to email the school to say, can you take Aurelia out of the class if she's too much? Because actually, she's going to affect other children. that may not have gone through death or loss and she's very vocal. So I was like, can you take her to Coral Cove and just nurture her a little bit because she's just so vocal. But yeah, and I think to have that environment

where a child feels confident to be vocal or to know that they're being listened to, because being vocal, it could become if your daughter felt like she wasn't being listened to but was just being vocal in an empty room or then there's a risk that that may lead into the future of it just kind of of stepping down and not each time

and it's just so important for the future kind of full stop that our children have a voice they're going to be the ones who get us out of certain predicaments that we're in at the moment but I think the other part of the well is we spoke about fun before

the well is where kind of the joy of the school comes out from So whether it's, so I stand at the front gate every morning to welcome the children in, sometimes our welfare officer will just have the kind of the loud speakers out and it'll just be loud music as the sort of families are kind of dancing in, so just walking in. And just those moments of fun that will spill out of the well are so important. Because we, the going over to the zoo, all studios, working in the science labs,

that is an accessed in the same way by an unhappy child. So if you focus on children being happy in your school, if they have that confidence, they'll have fallings out with friends, et cetera, but at the core of it, if they are happy. That's wife. Exactly. If they have that confidence, that sense of belonging, the opportunity to be happy, then they will take all the other opportunities that they're given. Do you have winners at your school?

We were talking about this before, like, you know, first, second and third in sports day. Yes. Good. We do. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah, we do. We're all in agreement then.

And I think my most embarrassing moment of this year, for Sports Day, we have an amazing sports day, we go to the Stonex Stadium that I'm not a rugby fan, but it's where rugby happens. Right. Where rugby is done. Yeah, exactly. I like sport. It made it sound like I don't even like sports then. But my most embarrassing moment was not the fact that I was, you know, the big sort of inflatable animals. Oh, yeah.

My director of sport thought it would be fun if all the teachers or a selection of teachers dressed up as an animal. It was kept as a mystery. The children didn't know who was who, although we revealed it in our last assembly of term. I took part. I was the shark. I was on the end, so I can only see one person in my peripheral. And I saw them start. Like a true shark.

I only saw one person. It looked like they were going for it. So my competitive side took over and I just bolted. for the line. And then it was only when I sort of saw some clips and replays after that everyone else was having fun, kind of wrestling each other. And there's me, just competitive, going for the first place. So yes, we have, we have winners. Are you that dad in sports dear? I think in the dad's race. That's, yeah, I will be. I think when the boys join me. Yeah, I'll try not to be. I won't. I will have to not take part. I love the parents race. That's like my favorite part

of Sports Day. Like this year, my, my, my best friends at the school too, and my best friend took part, but again, she went for it. I literally, obviously, I was pregnant. I actually wet myself. I was like, I just can't get over this, like how much she's going for, I mean,

after I've had this baby, I reckon I'm going to go into training. I'm going to sports day training. No, last year, people had spikes, spike trainers on. Stop it. No. Mums had spike trainers on.

Was it a proper rooting track? Yeah, no, it's like on, like, yeah, fit, full on field, like, yeah. Oh, I just haven't been wearing these. Oh, what a coincidence. I've got my spousen. Oh, my spousen. I'm not, oh.

What are the chances? We had a parent tug of war, which was a lot of fun and got rather competitive. It's the dads. Well, yeah. The mom was. Yeah, it's definitely equal. But it just kind of brought around that. We have an amazing sense of community at our school.

And to have that opportunity to bring all the parents together, to have a bit of fun, to be a bit silly, to have a tug of war. I think there was one against the teachers as well. But those events are really important. And that's so good for the kids. They love it. And their children love it. They love it. Yeah.

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Listen to paranormal activity with me, Yvette Fielding, wherever you get your podcast from. This is my ignorance, but I'm just asking the question because people will want to know. Because obviously Cooper goes to a state school, so we obviously have to do all these events to raise money, you know, to pay for stuff. Do you do them at private schools?

So we do a lot of fundraising purely for for charities. I know there are some schools, there will be some independent schools who will do fundraising for their school for a new bit of playground equipment. Our children will select a local national and international charity at the start of the year and then run different events or whether it's our Founders Day, our summer, fair and then they chose 52 lives, the School of Kindness, which is this amazing charity, which is a national charity, but it's so personal of the children finding out who they've helped, who their kindness has helped change lives, that it feels more local.

And then we had some personalised video sent back. So we do a lot of, a lot of charitable work. Just, sorry, I just keep asking for a friend here. Just ask you for a friend. Actually, it's personal. I was just wondering how you actually got into teaching and then being a head teacher. So I grew up playing a lot of football,

a lot of sport in general, and kind of went down a coaching, and I enjoyed it, and I enjoyed it because I was good at it. I find it uncomfortable saying that I was good at some of them. I was just out. I was just out. I do think as well, even having kids,

Even when you look at certain teachers, like Bodie's football coach, Coach Alex, he has just got it. Like, obviously I've worked with kids forever and a day and some people are just amazing teachers and other people aren't. I think you have got it or you've not. Yeah.

And I think it's actually something that links with what we should be telling our children, I think, is to find, I think there's a lot of misconceptions, there's kind of survivorship bias of your sort of people who have made it in a very narrow field who have said, oh, look, I followed my passions, my passion became my job, you should all do this, even though they are incredibly fortunate in the 1%.

I think that message needs to be tweaked slightly for children, that it should be find something you're good at. When you're good at something, you enjoy it more, and then keep getting better at it, and it will become your passion, as opposed to kind of flipping it the way around. So I think that was with me, was I really enjoyed coaching.

I was good at coaching, went into teaching. Teaching is, I think a good teacher is actually a good coach. You're flexing to the knees of the children in front of you. You're making sure they're all stretched and challenged. And then I really enjoyed, I guess, coaching again, of coaching staff, of leading staff development, which took me into kind of more leadership roles. And I've always had a passion for it.

I think... I prefer working with the kids or it's anxious. I mean, it's always the children. The best part of my job is the children. If I've been sat at my desk for too long, which sometimes I am, just going for a wander around the corridors into the classrooms, just having a chat with the children. Have you got a favourite age range of children in the school?

I couldn't possibly answer that. I thought you were going to say, do I have a favourite child? Do you have a favourite child? Do you have a favourite child? I feel like you can always tell the head teacher. his favourite kids. Oh, I thought you meant personally my own, out of my own two children. Do you have my favorite one out of you want to?

I taught, when I taught I was lower key stage two, three and four. But now I teach more five and six. I love going and being the mystery reader in reception, pre-reception. Oh, that's cute. So I haven't really answered your question because I've said all year groups. Oh, it's very diplomatic. It's like a politician. him.

Yeah, I think, yeah. I just love the young ones because I just think what are they going to say? Like, when I go into class like K-to-K, if I go and help out, I'm always like, so what did your mum and dad do? And what they'll tell me what their parents do is like, obviously nothing where their parents is like, they just pick up the phone all day. Yeah. Yeah, see, that is those sorts of conversations that I'm really nervous about my boys joining the school

where they, where children have a vivid imagination and may not always. You're going to have no secrets. No, exactly. And that's fine. It's the stuff that they make up and embellish because they want to tell a good story. So, yeah, we'll see how those rumours spread when they're doing. They can get us into worlds of trouble these kids, can't they? I would say my favourite is like these slightly older kids because you can actually have a conversation with them. Yeah. And it makes some sense. And they have their own little minds at that point. And I really like it. And how they see the world. Yeah, because my little boy is eight. So he's kind of in that really good age where he's articulate and knows what he's talking about. and has a, you know, has a focus.

My eldest has just, he's five, but just obsessed with the World Cup at the moment. And just being able to have it. Is he got a pinney sticker book? Yes, he does. He's got wall chart. He's been, I'm exposing some bad parenting now. He's watched all of the England matches,

but he's had little sleeps before them. I don't think that's bad parenting. It's cool memories, right? We are creating cool memories, my own. But I found, and I think this is a reflection of, of a much bigger picture as well. But I love watching the football, but I found myself watching him watching the football

more than I was actually watching football. Oh, really? Yeah, because he just loves it so much. And then to your point, we're then having these conversations afterwards. He's talking about, yeah, and it's hilarious. It's what they say. He's got these opinions of, oh, yeah, Madweke

should have come on earlier or whatever it is. Yeah, he knows. Yeah, that was both this morning. They were through the players with Will. And Will was like, well, no, about the best players in the table. squad and whatever else. It's like, well, you're wrong there, Bo. And it's been really nice to my partner

because obviously they have that football bond together. They do. They're the clubs that they go to together and really football has brought them together. I think that's nice for dads especially because as mums, we've kind of got that lovely affection constantly with our little ones, haven't we?

And then I think dads sometimes feel a little bit lost in their roles sometimes. And then as the children get a bit older... Until football happens. Yeah, and a couple happens. So when, I feel like, when the dad, I felt it's very much with my husband, Danny, when the dad then has something in common with that child,

it changes something a little bit and you see like that connection between them. Yeah, and I think that's something that connects nicely with what we have at school is that we have a system where we have subject specialists for most subjects. So from our youngest children, they will have their drama teacher,

French, Spanish, art, sports, you name it, they've kind of got a subject specialist. And I think that teacher, they are teaching their passion. And I think kind of that connection where you have that thing in common, then you're able to really pass that passion onto them. And we see that. We see that with our shows that we put on our art exhibition. And that's what we want.

We want children to just be exposed to as many different passions as possible. and the teacher really, they hold the key for that. Yeah, they do, absolutely. And going back to the point I'm made of, you can really tell a teacher that loves what they're doing. You can tell a teacher that is there to teach their passion as opposed to just teach. Yeah, and we're so lucky.

Our teachers are amazing. And you have this outpouring of appreciation when you have these final days, assemblies, speech days, prizegivings, and particularly of the parents who are leaving, who will just say, how amazing the team are, how well the teachers know their child, how their child has become the best versions of themselves because they have been seen and known by those teachers all the way through.

And what are your class sizes again, did you say? So we have a maximum of 20 children through the whole school, but the lower down children, the age groups, they will be slightly smaller. So we will be roughly around classes of 16. And then our youngest, so we are opening a pre-reception for the first time in September. And we will, again, that will be a sort of maximum capacity of around 16. I'm in an amazingly fortunate position where my youngest will be joining. And I think we all want the best for our children and are incredibly ambitious for them.

We want them to be happy. And for me to be able to be part of designing a new part of a school with my own children in mind of just. what the best educational experience is going to be is something I'm a privileged position to be in. Yeah, I think it makes a difference as well, having a head teacher that has children. It's because I feel like sometimes there'll be teachers or head teachers that don't actually have children. And there's so much more knowledge that comes when you have your own child being in a role like that, I find. Yeah, and firstly I'm wary of having many amazing colleagues who don't have children who are fantastic. teachers. I'm sure. I'm sure they're fantastic. But the challenge, I think the challenge that

teachers have is seeing the world through children's eyes and being able to teach to that and support with that. But there is also that challenge of seeing the world through the parents' eyes. So that you know when you get a tricky phone call or email, but actually that parent is just worried or a bit scared and it's coming from a place of just exhausted. Yeah. And I think to have that empathy and compassion is really important and it helps with how you set the culture of a school and that and again that part of community is so important. It is, yeah. It's just so, it's so lovely to hear somebody talk so passionately about their job and their school and everything they're created. Yeah, I'm just incredibly proud of the school and our children and our teachers and

it's a, I think it's important that it's a partnership. It's with parents, with families and working together. But yeah. So Tom, before you leave us, it's been lovely. We're going to do our Mum's the Word top five. Now you've just told me you've done a bit. You've heard of this Mum's the Word top five that we do. So we're doing a, we're throwing out to you, Tom, today.

Yeah. Okay, so prepare yourself. So we are going to do the top five things that you wish parents understood about school. Dun, dun, dun, done. I feel like, did it, did it, what's that the theme tune for? Calm down. Well, yeah, you give me 30 seconds. All the seconds, yeah.

Go on then. Hit it off. So, to start with, and I will check my notes. Well, we just spoke about it, that school and home are on the same team, and will always be on the same team. The child is at the center of everything, and I think sometimes there can be misconceptions. It might be a parent's own experience of their school,

but it's that 100% we are the same team. That's so important. It is. It's not a battle. There's no war that needs to be had with the school. And it does. It does feel like that sometimes.

If there's a barrier between listening, especially when it comes back to things that have happened for you growing up as a child and you're almost holding on to it, that resentment to towards it. I've got childhood trauma. Yeah, towards a teacher, I do feel like that. Like with my maths teacher, I hold a lot of resentment towards maths teachers. specifically mine. Yeah, I don't have been about math teachers, too.

Yeah, because if I'd have had, because I remember I had a really good math teacher, and I got my first ever 100%, it was when I was a lot younger. And then it changed to this really, really terrible math teacher who stood me up and told me I was a stupid girl because I couldn't do my times tables. And from that point onwards...

They got that right, didn't they? Stupid girl. And from that point onwards, my barrier came up to maths and has never come down ever since that. point. Number two. Yeah, number two. Move on, move on. The confidence comes from doing hard things, that we, we want children to fail a little bit.

We want them to be confident to fail and learn from it and not strive for perfection because that isn't healthy. But actually, I think for parents to know that they will have a little bit of struggle. It's supported struggle, but that's how they get stretched. That's how they'll progress. And that is life. Yeah, exactly. No one goes through life of a perfect life. I mean, girls were talking about this, weren't we?

Yeah, I'm not a previous episode. Yeah, about how if your kid doesn't want to do something, you've got to give them that push and go, look, I know you don't want to, but do it. And then to just make them resilient. I feel like a lot of people have lost resilience in life. Yeah, and I think that's such an important thing. And we have to set up scenarios as a school where they will take risks. because we, I think what we haven't touched on the tool is,

is kind of screen time, online, screen use. How do you feel about screen time? How do you feel about screen time? I feel quite strongly about, firstly, the big difference between screen time and screen use, and I think there is a huge difference there of as a school, we have a responsibility to make sure anything that involves a screen, and it will,

and I think it should, but we're thinking it's not screen time, it's not how long they're on it for, it's what they're using it for. So we, Alleynes, we believe that like an iPad should just be an extension of their pencil case. So it's, it's, oh, we're doing this now. Actually, if you take your iPad out, we will film that and then you can do a voiceover of it, and it's enhancing their learning. Because it's modern day, isn't it now? Yeah, and at the very least, they should be creative with an iPad.

what shouldn't be happening is children just using them passively. And I think that's kind of where the screen time comes from. Is that passive use of... Well, it's just scrolling. Scrolling through YouTube. Dopamine hit. And yeah, and that's where it becomes really dangerous. And I'm hoping that by the time my boys are kind of at that point that we will have...

We've made a start and I just hope we keep progressing with essentially protecting our children online. But then the flip side of that is the overprotection in real life because we want them to come offline. We don't want them to seek alternatives on devices still. But then for that to happen, we somehow need to be slightly less protective in the real world of kind of the being able to go to the shops when they're 10 and not being scared of kind of a math teacher,

lurking or... Yeah, no, I completely agree. I think we've taken their independence away from them and now they can't actually develop, but we just go, oh yeah, sit over there and have your iPad. And I think we've made the right first step, but it's a small step and it's such a big journey to take. But as many things that we can have happening in real life for our children,

all the better. Even with gaming, I grew up gaming probably more than I should have, but it was always shoulder to shoulder gaming. I was always sat with my friends, and it was a social experience. It wasn't online. So my son will play on FIFA, but never online, always with me. Yeah. Not against me yet.

That's coming. Yeah, I'm worried for that time. So there's a balance with all of this. But at Allene's Regents Park, we will ensure that screen use is either creative, ideally transformative. Back to that AIQ lesson that I spoke about with the drones being created, there was just a moment where all the children were struggling with one part of it. And the teacher said, oh, I noticed from my last lesson that everyone was struggling with this one bit of this. If you just go onto your iPad, I've recorded a video to show you how to do it. And then suddenly

that one teacher is with all 20 children individually. And that's transformative. That you couldn't do in the same way without taking the whole lesson. because we've spoken about this before if you're a visual learner. Like if that was right down for me, I'd be like, ah, I'm not doing it.

Whereas like visually me looking I'll be able to actually do it. Yeah, I think that's amazing. And that's also not something that you can go, right, children, all gather round,

I'm going to show you this. Yeah, if it's such an intricate. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So that is, that is a little start mucking about, don't they?

As soon as you'll gather around together, it's like. Yeah, because you're all in close, close proximity. There'll be pox and all sorts. Yeah, well, Cooper plays, actually plays this game.

And I let him play it every morning whilst I get his breakfast ready because it's times tables but it's him creating this garden like he creates this garden but to be able to create this garden and you have to do it. You have to do it.

And honestly, the speed now at what he does his times tables I can't do mine because of that horrible teacher I had and it baffles me, it blows my mind and I'm like, okay this is this is constructive this is good screen learning that you're doing here as opposed to yeah, being actually on mind.

Say with Maya too, like Aurelia cannot, she just can't do it. She just can't do the screen at all. Like with that, that would just stress her out. Bodie, he can sit there all day long and do them time saver. But again, that's strength. Yeah. You know, some people are better on screen. She just actually needs to just be doing the timesables in person or singing a song.

I'm a writer downer. Yeah. That was good grandma. A writer. I'm a writer downer. As opposed to a typeer. So, yeah, at each to their own, I think. Massively so.

Three. Number three. Well, this, this. Sorry, what's this number three? I think, I think so. And we've touched on this already. Children remember how school made them feel. They will, they will remember how they felt more than what they learned ultimately.

So I think for parents to understand that, that the, you've both already spoken about just core memories from school that stuck with you. We know that our young, our young people, our children coming through, they will remember how, school made them feel. And that doesn't mean it all has to be incredibly positive. There's many things that can be learned from a what could be a negative experience is the wrong phrase, but a challenging experience. There's many things that can be taken and learned from that. And their memory might be, oh, that time that the teacher was actually really vulnerable and they opened up about their own sadness in whatever situation. So it doesn't mean it has to all be happy and all fun, but it's the support, it's their friends. So I think, yeah, for parents to know that,

how children feel will last with them much longer than... Yeah, because you do really, really remember. School? Yeah. Like, I... And this is in a positive and a negative way. I obviously remember the terrible teachers, but I really remember the good ones.

Like, there was some teachers. I had this one science teacher, and I excelled in... Excels, that's a bit extreme, but I did okay in this one science because... You liked the teacher? Of this teacher. makes huge difference.

And because of the way he taught, like he got us up, I mean, it's health and safety now, but he used to get us up on the desks walking around to learn about convection. No, not convection. Currents, that's what we were learned about. And like he was such a visual teacher. Yeah. Yeah, taught us visually. And it was amazing and it was exciting and he was good fun and he was just got us all laughing.

And I remember him. He's called Dr. Carson. I wonder what he's doing now. He's probably retired. But he was brilliant. But then the other science teacher, terrible. Because he didn't care.

He just sat there, read your textbooks. Dictation. Answer those questions. That's that. Nothing. No interaction. And you remember? They're your memories.

Yeah. And I think we're very fortunate. And I think both in state and independent sector where you have teachers who just care, they really care for the children in their classes, their progress, their well-being. And, yeah, I think that's, yeah, we shouldn't dismiss just how much children will remember, particularly their feelings.

Yeah. And then, have we got a fifth? Are we on five? Four. Are we on four? Yeah, I mean, so I think just reminding parents that success is more than just results, exam results, that success, I had 31 children who applied to be head boy or head girl from year five going into year six. and they were all successful because they decided that they would just give it a go.

They knew that there was a good chance that they would not succeed because they were only going to be one boy and one girl taking on that role. But actually they did. That was success, just the attitude to give it to go, knowing that you might fail. It's really easy to put your hand up to answer a question that you know you're going to get right. It's much harder for a child to have the confidence to put their hand up at something they might get wrong. And that's the same with this application. And it's, yeah, success doesn't mean what the end result is.

It's actually the, I was going to say the journey they go on, which sounds awfully cheesy. No, it's true. Yeah. It's all about the journey. I don't know. I've never really thought of it like that, but that is, you're so right with what you're saying there. I'm going to use that on Cooper when I get home. When he's scared for doing something, I'll be like, yeah, it's just the journey, mate.

So we, every sort of day at Allains, we, all schools have values. we have the rock values, respect, opportunity, curiosity, courage and kindness. But we really, again, it's easy to say you provide holistic education. It's easy to say that you live your values. But we make sure we are always in how we speak, how we, to the children, how we celebrate them. We're referring to the values. And actually that the opportunity that those children took. And they were courageous to go for the interview.

You know, it's just bringing it back to that. language as well because that helps children understand that yes it's great to go for these things. I love that. That's great. Was there one more or were we on for? I mean, I think we're on for, there might be one more. So there isn't all in Alleynes and we believe that we all can be all we can be. That was a mouthful. I'm quite proud I got that out. But it's about helping your child to find their thing. We spoke about it quite early on. They are not going to be good at everything and that's absolutely fine. It's it's experiencing everything, finding what they're good at, specialising as late on as possible. I think there have been some trends or cultures where there's

really early specialisation of they're good at maths, so they're going to focus on maths all the way through or they are good at the violin, so they're going to do violin all the way through. But there are some exceptions, but actually when you look at the top athletes, musicians, performers, they specialised really quite late on. So Roger Federer, maybe a slightly dated reference now, but he played many different sports growing up and didn't actually specialize into tennis quite late on. Really?

I think, and I can't remember the various musicians and performances. But there are some people that are actually just really good at everything. Yeah. Well, Danny didn't seem until he was there. Much later on, you only played guitar. Yeah, Tom didn't sing until he was. 16. Yeah. And so I think we are in a world where there's so much variation, there's so much change that our children need to be able to adapt, to be able to flex. And if we narrow our children's opportunities too much, then as the world changes, they will find it trickier to change. And also it's being, as I said, it's being exposed to as many different experiences as possible to find out what they're good at and to take that further. So why Arraylia does morning football now. she does the girl's football

so I'm like, right, another string of footage. Yeah, absolutely. Do it all. Just before we finish, a really quick question to do with AI actually, are you pushing the kids a bit more

in directions of jobs that can't be taken over by AI? Like, as in like careers, are you saying maybe don't go in that direction because that's going to be, that's going to be... Don't panic yet, Tom, don't panic yet. I think you'll be retired by then,

surely. I mean, I've lived well hope so. Well, yeah. Tom, it's been a pleasure having you on. Thank you for all you're doing for all those lovely children out there. And I'm sure they'll go on to be wonderful successes in life. Well, thank you. Thank you for having me on my first ever podcast.

Woo! Wasn't that bad, wasn't that bad, wasn't. I can relax. I can relax out. You can chill. Well, that's a wrap on another episode. Thank you so much for Tom Letticeaer from Allens for joining us today. Don't forget to leave us a review.

Follow us on socials at at Mums the Word underscore pub and subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can watch this episode in full. Just search Mums the Word. So I've been Georgia Jones And I've been Kelsey Parker And we'll be back with another episode Same time, same place next week.