Mum's The Word! The Parenting Podcast - 'My Pure Existence Is An Issue For Some People' Talia Mar on Raising a Daughter, Pregnancy Being Absolute Hell & Being An Autistic Mum

Episode Date: April 26, 2026

This week on Mum's The Word, Georgia Jones is joined by singer and new mum Talia Mar, and she's refreshingly honest about the parts of motherhood no one warns you about.Talia opens up about why pregnancy was far from the glowing, magical experience she expected, how her autism diagnosis changed the way she understands herself, and the moment having a daughter made her see the world completely differently.From battling hyperemesis gravidarum to navigating the overstimulation of new motherhood as a neurodivergent woman, Talia shares the coping strategies, the hard moments, and the humour that's got her through it all.The pair get into the real conversations every mum is having right now:Pregnancy nobody prepares you for — from HG to lightning crotch (yes, really)Being a neurodivergent mum — managing overstimulation, masking & finding your rhythmRaising a daughter in today's world — and why it sparked Talia's powerful new single LadyThe female experience — from street harassment to the double standards we've all just… acceptedScreen time & gaming — why Talia thinks games get a bad rap (and what Georgia learns about Minecraft)Getting an autism diagnosis as an adult woman — and why it was a relief, not a labelThere are laughs, lightbulb moments, and plenty of "why did no one tell us this?" honesty.If you've ever felt like motherhood is overwhelming, messy, and nothing like the Instagram version… this episode is for you.🎧 Listen now to Mum's The Word: The parenting podcast that says what everyone else is thinking.A Create Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome back to Mums the Word. I'm your host, Georgia Jones, and today I am joined by the amazing Talia Mar, the singer and now Mum to Baby Junie. She opens up about pregnancy, not being the magical experience you think it will be, being a neurodivergent mum and much, much more. So grab a cupper, get comfy,

and let's jump in to a brand new episode of Mums the Word. So Talia, thank you so much for joining us. Thanks for having me. This is fun. She walked in so glamorous. I was like, oh God. She should have put more than just my white cardigan on. No, I make the most of baby days off now, so I'm like, I'm going to get glam, I'm going to do my thing.

Do you know what? Maybe I need to have that mantra a little bit more, actually, because I'm just like, yep, jeans, cardigan. You say that, but you look so glad you're blown out, like, no. Well, thank you. Look at that. Those girls start in each other. That's what mum's do. So how has your 2026 been so far?

It's been good. I mean, it's been definitely different to other years. Yes, because it's your first one as a mom? Yeah, I had her middle of last year. And I think it's getting better, but like, I'm still navigating everything. So it's kind of one of those things where like it's good, but I'm literally always on my, not on my feet, but like on edge. Just waiting. Not on my feet.

Not my feet. Just on edge. Teaching on the age. Of the mental breakdown. Just like as soon as you figure something out, it's like, okay, so now what's going to go wrong? Oh, is that though, isn't it? And I always feel like,

especially like the early years of parenting. Just when you think you've nailed it. You're like, right, they're sleeping now or they've taken a bottle finally. It's then they start teething or they decide to get ill. Yeah. It's like hour by hour. Yeah.

Some days I'm like, do you know what she's woke? She's in a great mood. Oh my God. be such a lovely day and then like 3pm hits and she's like actually mum i have a different idea what i'm gonna scream i'm actually in bad mood now okay um so that's always fun but you know i love i love spontaneity so there's nothing more spontaneous than being a parent oh that really is how are you finding the whole journey because you've talked about how being pregnant wasn't necessarily oh hell you expected so what was hell what was it that so i was really sick were you

Okay. Honestly, I bow down to any woman that is not only pregnant, but also has the bad sickness. Oh, I'm so jealous people that don't. Sorry. No, I love that for you, though. Like, it makes me happy when I hear that for other people. I did have personal depression. So, you know, swings her out.

Good God. So you were, yeah, you were a sicky one. Yeah, super sick. Like, I was going through all my notes the other day on my NHS up and it was just like hyper-emesis. hyper remissus. Oh, bless you. So it was full-blown. Oh, it was pretty bad.

Right. But it was more just that like you kind of get used to feeling like the worst thing in the world. And then like the back pain hits and then you get lightning crotch and then you get like, and I was just like, sorry, why is this? Every time you speak to a doctor, they're like, yeah, normal. What do you mean? Normal. I know.

Because do you know what? If it was a man and they weren't pregnant and they would, obviously. And they were just experiencing these. They'd be like, that's awful. They'd be like, we will hospital, actually. Yeah. We will put you on a drip and we will monitor you and we will send you for physio and do all this. Whereas we just get on with it.

And then to finish it off, you've got to squeeze a melon out. And you know you're just like, sorry, why is this the final stage? Like, why is this where it ends? Why didn't it end in something really well? I mean, obviously we get a baby. So, I mean, that is the positive. Fun. The ending part is the most painful part.

Oh, it's painful part. Oh, do you know what, though? I love birth. Did you? Had an epidural. Yeah. I had a great time. And you just...

Fun. Right. I would say birth is fun when everything goes right. Yes. Okay. Do you know, you're probably one of the first people that was gone and said that. However, part of me actually agrees with you. Okay.

Yeah. It's fun. You were probably so excited to get... Oh, my God. I was induced. Were you? By my choice. Yeah.

Okay. Because I was like, I need this baby to... exit immediately. Yeah. Like, this is a no-go zone. Vacancy, please, no. And because I was induced, I got the epidural early. Right.

So I did have, I was having, I was already in labour, like I was having contractions, but they weren't that bad yet. And like, I just skipped all the crap stuff and just got to the fun bit, which is like the challenge. Yeah. Of pushing a baby out and then meeting your child. So it was actually quite fun. Did you know, it's just, so your little girl's called Junie, isn't she?

Yeah. Great name. Did you know she was going to be a girl? Yeah. You did. You found out. Immediately. Did you?

As soon as that blood test was possible. Yeah. I waited until 12 weeks because I didn't want to know if anything had gone wrong. Yes. You didn't want to associate the baby. I was like, I just don't want to know yet. But as soon as I got to the point where I felt a little bit safer, I, yeah, I did the blood test and found out immediately because I was like, I need to know. Did you have a preference at all?

I didn't think I did. At the time, I was like, you know, raising a girl would be really fun because I love traditionally girly things. And like that would be really cute. But also like I'm a bit of a warrior. And I think with a girl, I was like, am I going to worry more because of all these things I've experienced? And then also raising a boy, I think would be lovely because I'd love to raise a really nice

boy. And like, I also have a lot of traditionally male like preferences like gaming and all that. So I thought I didn't. But then I found out she was a girl. And I was like, yes. What are you? That's incredible. But then if it had been a boy, I think I'd have probably felt the same.

Yeah. Yeah. So. Especially when it's you're first, you kind of just happy. there. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I just wanted everything was fine. A little human that you can have. Yeah. I was a bit like that. I was like, I didn't mind too much. I think if someone held a gun to my head and I had to choose, I would have gone girl, but I've now got a boy and I couldn't imagine it any other way. Oh, 100%. And like you said, like I think for us, for our generation, it's exciting for us to be

able to teach them a new way. Yeah. And I think that's what I was excited about. Yeah. And like, you don't have to be a typical girl or a typical boy. You don't have to, you can be wherever you want to be. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. And also, like, for me, it's important to teach a boy how to respect women. Yeah. Lord or Lord. Yeah. A lot of them down. Yeah. So have you watched Manisfair? Oh, unfortunately, yes. Yeah, because I was listening to your new song. Yeah. Which is called Gert. Lady. Yeah. Not girls.

Lady. I knew that. I knew that. I knew it wasn't that. It's because I said girls. So much. Lady, which is what I am. And I was listening to the lyrics of it and it's incredible.

Thanks. Having a little girl, what made you want to write a song like that? Yeah, it was the first song I wrote back after having her. Was it? Right. So it's been a common topic in the studio. I've written about being a woman. and like having all these different experiences.

And like it's not an uncommon thing for me to have like brought up in a studio session. But I think I had a different perspective on things that I'd previously thought about. And while I've always, you know, felt negatively about these experiences, there was like a new feeling that had kind of come with them having a daughter because it was like, I'm now not only upset that I've experienced this. I'm now fearful that this is going to continue on. And the child that I have is now going to, you know, follow in the same footsteps. So it kind of came from that.

And yeah, it was a weird feeling. I always say it's like a bit of sweet song because it's hopeful, but it's also like, why do we have to hope for this? I know. Which is such a shame. It should be the norm, right? Yeah. Like it's...

When you say experiences, have you ever spoken about experience? What experiences you've... Yeah, briefly. I spoken about like, I suffered with an eating disorder when I was... Oh God. I mean, throughout my life, we've had many a moment. But in 2020 is when it like really sort of like hit hard because no one was around me.

so I was just free to do what I want. No one could police me. No one could see that I was getting smaller and smaller because I was living alone. Right. And it was locked down. So I was like, perfect.

Oh my God. I, at the time, I knew I was having problems, but I, you almost like get off on it. I was like, because you were like,

no one knows. I was like, no one knows. I can just get smaller and smaller and waste away and no one's going to know and it'll be brilliant, which is so mental when I look back. I'm just like, oh God.

But little things, little things like that. Yeah. And I just think, oh God, I hope she. she's not put in a position where she feels like she needs to do that. And, you know, experience with a soul and, like, even just walking down the street and having

someone touch you or grab your arm or touch your bum, and it's like, oh my God, why is there something that every woman I know is experienced? I know. And isn't it weird that, like, we almost, well, I mean, I don't so much anymore because it's kind of become so much more talked about. But, like, back when I was younger, you just accepted it. Yeah, it was just, oh, yeah. If a man grew up to you in a club, you'd be like, is what it is.

That's what happens when you go to a club. Like, literally mind-blown now thinking about that, especially now we've both got children. Yeah. Honestly, mental. I mean, honest to God, if I had a little girl, someone went and tried to grow up. I would be, I'd be catching a merchandise.

Well, I'd be in jail. Yeah, no, absolutely not. But that'd be it. It's mental, though. Yeah, exactly. Where is the man just what I'm just got free, my career? Yeah. You know, we almost like accepted it.

And like I look back at things that I did when I was younger. And I'm like, I put myself in some positions where that was dangerous. Yeah. And like, but you just kind of go, it's fine. Yeah. Well, because you hope that it's not dangerous. And it's almost like a rebellion of like, why is this dangerous? Like, why is it dangerous for me to leave my house when it's dark?

Yeah. That is ridiculous. Isn't it? But it is dangerous. And it's like, oh my God. Yeah. Or like, why is it dangerous for my husband to go? go for a run, that's fine at night time.

If I was to do the same run at night time, even something as simple as there's a run he does down by the river, but it's quite secluded. Yeah, no way. I couldn't do that run. And it's mad, and I said to him the other day about that. I was like, isn't it mad that you do not have to think about that? Yeah, I say that's my husband all the time.

Yeah. Like, I'm so jealous that, like, you just exist and it's fine. Whereas, like, my pure existence is an issue for some people. Oh my gosh. What do you mean? Well, exactly. Like, for instance, you've got a miniskirt on today. Yeah.

You, somewhere in the back of your head, when you're walking down that high street, you'll be like... Yeah. I've already had looks. I've had pools, yeah. And exactly. And it's like, why should we even have to think about how we're even flipping dressing? It's ridiculous. And can walk down the street with a pair of shorts on.

Yeah. And we don't even think about it. I don't know. You're not bothered about a man's knee. No, I'm truly not. So is the single out now? Yeah. Out now, guys.

Where can we find it? Whatever platform you listen to is Spotify, Apple, Music, DISA, the lot. Great. Yeah. And how long has your music career been going? Well, so I found out in an interview recently. It's been 10 years since I released my, well, my first single that's still available. Oh, wow.

Which he was like, how does it feel 10 years in the industry? And I was like, sorry what? I did. I was like 10, but I'm a teenager. So that doesn't make sense. Like, I'm a teen mom. So, yeah, I didn't even realise it had been 10 years since that song came out, which is actually makes me sick for my stomach. That's incredible, though, like that you're, you know, you're still doing what you really love doing and you've had a baby a long way and got married.

Yeah. So the music side is one thing. Yeah. Are you a gamer as well then? Yeah. Right. Because this is, I find this really interesting. Because growing up, obviously, for me, gaming was always a boy.

Oh yeah. Like the boys did it. Girls didn't do gaming. So what made you get into that? So I've always played games ever since I can remember. And I guess it probably is from my dad. My dad would play like, I mean, we had like a Nintendo 64. God, great.

I feel so old saying that. But we had a Sega. Sega. Oh yeah. Sega, Mega Drive. Oh God. Yeah. So my dad would play, he'd play Call of Duty on like his Xbox and like.

So I grew up. around it. And then I think as I got old enough to sort of go, oh, wait, I want to play with that. You know, I, I just followed suit in the kind of games that he played. I kind of never branched out into the more stereotypically girl games. And have you got siblings? I've got one younger sister. And is she, did she go down the same route? So she likes gaming, but not at the same level. She sort of, she likes casual games every now and again. But like, she lives alone. And I'm always like, oh my God, you have so much time to play games. Yeah, but like, I have other things I want to get done.

And I'm like, what do you mean? She's like, you know, I want to read a book. I want to watch it. No, no, I just want to play games. Well, so my little boy is like exactly the same. Okay, yeah. He loves gaming. And I need to ask your advice.

Fun. Because I saw a podcast that you'd done. Yeah. I think it was like a gaming specific one. And the lady was, was saying it was such a good point about stopping your child in the middle of a game when they're just about to win something. Oh my god, yeah. Now I do this all the time. Oh. Yeah. And I'm like, I have said now, so you stop now. He's like, Mommy, please, can I just finish this one little bit?

Yeah. Now, what, what happens when you try and stop someone mid-game? What goes through your mind? Um, do you know what? It's so game dependent. Right. Because they're, how old is it? He's eight. Okay. So it's so game dependent. There are some games where, like, you physically, you can't leave the game. I mean, you could, but you'd lose, like, things in your account. You do rank. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, you'd lose progress. That's interesting because, yeah. Right, okay. So, but there are some games where, like, you could literally just end where you are and you'll save, like, story-based games. You normally can kind of just leave where you are. Can you end Minecraft where you are and come back to it? Absolutely.

Okay, right. Well, that's good to know. My child is not pulling the wall over my eyes anymore. I mean, there are modes maybe if he's playing things like Bed Wars and like, but if he's literally playing regular Minecraft. Yeah. Unless he's in the fight with the ender dragon. Okay.

Right. Yeah. Or like the warden. Okay. You know, most things can be wrapped up in 30 seconds a minute. I think we're fighting right now, Cooper. Yeah. Like, are we fighting or are we just, you know.

Are we just building? Yeah. If you're building, absolutely, you can end that game where you are. Okay. Right. Great. That is brilliant to you. Yeah.

Oh, God. I've just ruined his next few years. You got to do. Right, okay. And in terms of like screens and stuff, so Cooper, he and my little boy, he's got a switch and he's got the PS5. Oh, okay, yeah. And like he's obsessed with it.

He loves it. Now me and Kelsey, my co-host, we're on completely different ends of the spectrum in terms of screen time. Oh, that's fun. Because she doesn't do it. Oh, I do that. I very much do. Yep.

And sometimes for my own personal gain, because it means I get to have an adult conversation. So for you, obviously, Junior's only a baby, but when she gets older, are you going to be pro screen time? I mean, I suppose you can't really get. Yeah, I kind of can't really stop her. I mean, I'm pro, I don't, honestly, I think it will change depending on the situation.

Yeah. I'm pro games. Yeah. I'm less pro TV. Okay, right. I'm not against TV, but I think with games, I think a lot of people don't realize that, like, your dexterity is getting worked,

your, you know, you're thinking about things, your decision-making. Like, you are learning and, like, developing skills while playing games. And I think a lot of people just think, oh, it's a screen. There can't be anything that good that comes from that. And it's just not true. Yeah.

I really agree with you on that. Because, like, Cooper plays this one golf game. And it's honest, and now he plays golf actually. Oh, that's so sweet. I love golf. Real life golf. How fun. And he's really good at it. And he's learned so many skills and he's learned the terminology and, you know, all the different techniques from gaming. Yeah. Purely from gaming. Yeah. And then there's another game he plays and you have to do your times tables to then be able to Yeah, things like that. Yeah. Bit of the game or build something or whatever. Yeah. And I'm like,

there is real good to come from it. There is. Actually. There is. And also we don't live in a screen free world. We live in a world where most jobs require screens, most jobs require computer ability. And I think where there's so much benefit to limiting screens, there's also benefit to, you know, getting them used to it so that they can use it. When they get to school, schools have computers now. They have iPads. They have all these things. Yeah. And I don't want her to be the one in the class that is falling behind because she can't use it.

She doesn't know how to use it. She doesn't know how, yeah. And I don't want to just stick her at dinner with an iPad at the table and like there's a time and a place. Yeah. but I'm definitely not going to be a no screen time, mum, but I don't want to use it all the time. It's a weapon. That's what I think.

Screen time is a weapon and I will pick my battles. Yeah, you will. Yeah, you've got to. It's the only way you get through parenting by picking your battles. And I love gaming. I hope I'm just be like, Junie, I'm going to go play a game. Yeah. You're not allowed.

You're not allowed. You're not allowed. Because she'll be like, can I play with you? Yeah, you can play with me. The only negative that, well, maybe not the only, obviously, there's dangerous people online. But I remember I went to the opticians a while back and the optician was saying to me

that because so many kids are living life at this distance, they're all becoming short-sized. Oh, really? That's interesting. Yeah, there's been such a rise in it. So that's where I've been like really keen on Cooper playing on his PlayStation rather than his switch close up because then he gets the distance. I also think switch, I love my switch.

But again, it's so big. portable and they know that. So like can we bring the switch? And it's like, well, how can I say no? Because you know I can bring the switch. The only way you don't bring the switch is by telling them it's out of battery. Oh yeah. Perfect. Then they do get to an age where they go, can I check? Yeah. Or no, no, no, it's completely dead. Okay. But even that, like, it's little things like that. Like, you're teaching them to think ahead. Yeah. Like, if I want to bring my switch out, I need to think about whether it's charged. Yeah. And it's the same that when they get old and have a phone and they need their purse and they need

all these little things are life skills that they do need to learn. Yeah, especially for boys. Yeah. Think ahead boys. Yeah. We can't do it all for you. I have done that too far. I'm like, well, if it's not charged, then it's on you. It's your own fault for not putting it on charge. Do you have an insatiable fascination with the paranormal? Are you ready to dive headfirst into the eerie realms of the unexplained?

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or just starting to dip your toes into the waters of the supernatural. Paranormal activity with me, Yvette Fielding, is your ultimate destination. Will you dare to join me? Listen to paranormal activity with me, Yvette Fielding, wherever you get your podcast from. Going off on a slight tangent. When you were young, you were diagnosed with autism? Yes, but not that much younger.

In my 20s. In your 20s? Oh, right. Yeah. Like literally 10 years ago. Like literally in 10 years because I'm not 20. You're not 30. Oh yeah, you're not.

No, I'm a teenager. Of course you are. 15, right? Yeah. I think when I was, oh God, I never remember. 21, 24. No, 24. I think my mid-20s.

And what? So how did. that look like what happened or what was going on for you to go, I think I want to go and see whether I'm neurodivergent? I'd always known. Had you? Yeah. It was quite clear and I think, I've told this story before, but when I was at school,

we learned about autism. I remember vividly. Did you? Yeah, we had a whole lesson on it. See, that's the difference in the 10 years there. I mean, sex education was like not even existing. Oh my God, yeah, we definitely had that. My very old chemistry teacher trying to talk about sex.

Yeah, no, it didn't go down. Oh, that's so awkward. No, yeah, we had it. We had a whole lesson on it. And I remember I turned to the person next to me and I was like, I don't really understand autism. Like, I, everyone does these things. And they were like, no, no, I don't.

And I was like, yeah, no, me either. What you're talking about? And it was little things about like, obviously the stereotype of autism. We didn't get taught about the fact. It's a spectrum. You know, we were taught about the really sort of extremes. Yeah.

And did you get taught about how it's different in girls? No. Oh, absolutely not. No, no, no, no. Never. Even now they don't really do that still. Of girls. Yeah.

Just forgotten about shock. Yeah, it was little things about like personal touch and things that I'd always struggled with and loud like overwhelm and noises and physicalities that I just struggled with growing up. Yeah. And I said that to them and I was like, what do you mean? Like, you don't. I was like, and I do. Hang on a minute.

Does that mean I'm this thing that they're talking about? And I was like, no, surely not. Was it quite a lightbulb moment then? It was. I was just like, and I was probably nine, ten? Oh gosh, right? Yeah, yeah, I was young. I was really young.

It was my, I went to two primary schools and it was at my second primary school. So I must have been maybe, yeah, year six, nine or seven. Because that's quite a confusing age, isn't it? To hear things like that. And I've always thought that's just the norm. Just the norm. Yeah. of how you feel is how everyone else feels.

And then when you find out it's not, I was like, oh, this has got a word. Yeah. So it's a bit weird. Like, but just thought, oh, whatever, like, it is what it is. And because they'd said things like, you know, nonverbal and like there were extremes that obviously I didn't present. I was like, oh, well, I'm not because that seems to be the only thing that they talk about.

Yeah. So I was like, okay, whatever. Like no eye contact. Yeah. Like nothing. Yeah. And it was the extreme. And I was like, I experienced all of these things, but to,

a lesser degree. So maybe I'm just being dramatic. Like I am dramatic. We've been new. But then as I got older, I just started noticing like the way my friends were interacting with people and the way I interacted and they found things so much easier than I did when it came to social situations. And I was like, why does everyone else love a party and love a conversation and like love to do all these things? And I'm sat here and I'm literally fighting for my life in this like party situation and just desperately like, when can I go home? When can I go home? It's so loud. I was panicking. over-stimulated. So overstimulated.

And yeah, it was when I went to therapy in my 20s. And I remember I had a situation at a club where I had a really bad panic attack. Right. And I brought it up in my therapy session. She was like, what do you think that means? Like, what do you think that brings up for you? I was like, oh, I'm just getting overstimulated by these things. And she was like, no, no.

But like, you know, when you think back to your childhood, like, what? And I was like, there is no causal situation. Like, I wasn't true. triggered by something that happened in my childhood, I'm just autistic. Like, I was like, I need to get this diagnosis because like, it's actually starting to hinder me now because I can't just say to her, I think I have autism because she'd be like, okay. It's quite nice to have a bit of an answer sometimes as well, even if it's just purely for you. So you're like, I knew it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah. And it's changed so much. I remember I spoke

to my friends when I first met them 10 years ago. And I was like, we spoke about it. And I said, I, you know, I think I probably have autism. They were like, what? No, like, and as the years went on and they learned more and they got to know me, they were like, babe, yeah. Yeah, yeah. This is clear as day. And like, my mom looks back and she's like, I don't know how I didn't see it because it's so obvious.

But I know, but women mask as well, right? I mask heavily. Yeah. And it was, it's taught so differently. And what autism was when we were growing up is not what it's portrayed to me now. And so, like, we learn now. And people are like, oh, yeah, clear as day. We know that you're autistic.

But back then it was like, oh, no, she's speaking. She's, you know, able to converse. I was, you know, even the autism assessment, he was like, you know, you are successful in a job that is, would require skills outside of the autism sort of like spectrum. But he spent two minutes and he went, yeah. Yeah, but I always think people that are neurodiversion are always such creatives. Yeah, 100%.

Like such creatives. Such an outlet. Yeah. And also it's that whole thing of like similar to kind of ADHD. and that side of things, of finding something that you love and that keeps you focused and that you can like feel safe in and you run with it because that is your happy place, right? Yeah, 100%. And it's just how.

Did you feel like once you got that diagnosis, almost like a bit of a weight lifted and you could be like, right, well, that's fine. It's okay then if I feel like that. Yeah, I think it was kind of just a case of like, oh, thank God I've got that sorted. because like I said, it was, if you knew me, it was so clear I knew like, but you couldn't really speak about it. You know, there's a bit of stigma around sort of self-diagnosis. So I never ever sort of spoke aloud until I got the diagnosis efficiently.

But it was nice to be like, oh, okay, this is actually a thing. And I've had a lot of people since speaking about it, like a lot of younger girls, especially sort of being like, oh, you know, I got diagnosed with autism and I was embarrassed about it. But now actually, like, I'm not embarrassed about it because you've spoken about it and you've kind of normalized it and made it this whole thing. which is really nice. Yeah, and I think there's so many people out there that aren't yet diagnosed,

I do think it would make such a difference to them and their lives if they were. Yeah. Because as well, I think it almost then makes someone feel a bit more at ease and not feel like they have to mask and have to. Even I take myself off, like if I'm at a party, or not that I go to many parties, I don't know if I was at a party. I go to the bathroom.

Yeah. And I'll sit in there for about five minutes. Debrief. Just having a moment because I need to like self-regulate and not be in a loud environment for a little bit. Yeah. Because it does. It gets overwhelming. How was it for you then having junior?

Because obviously, you know, like children are over-stimulated. Yeah, they are. The amount of time. I'm like, Mommy just needs a minute. Yeah. I need quiet. Yeah. How did you find that?

Hard. Yeah. Yeah. I think I went into it expecting it and knowing it. sort of I had my plans. So like I remember when we first started of say I was exclusively breastfeeding. So I was doing the nights. And I remember next to my bed I had my headphones.

And I thought every time she wakes up, I put my headphones on. I'm just not even going to give myself the opportunity to have the stimulation of her like cry or whatever, which did help. Okay. So you, once you put your headphones on. I put my headphones on while she were feeding. Pick her up. Right. Okay.

So you'd know you were, she was having her food. Yeah. She obviously wasn't making noise anymore. you could just, and I could just, like, have a little bit of, like, a disconnect between what was happening. Because also physically, it's over-stimulating. Like, it's a whole new sensation. It's like, okay, there is a human being literally attached to me,

who also is trying to not be attached to me and trying to be attached to me at the same time. And then crying in between and then, like, oh, and now she's pooed everywhere. And, like, there's just a lot that changes so quickly. So you're just like, oh, my God. Oh, oh, my God. I was oversimidate, and I still get over-stimulated. But it's just one of those things that, like, as long as she's safe, I can step out for 30 seconds. and just go, okay, let's just think, regulate, and back in we go, and then it's fine.

And your husband, is he, is he at all? He's never been diagnosed with any neurodivergency, but I'd be shocked if he wasn't ADHD. Yeah, I think he's in HD, definitely. Anyone that meets him, he's like, yeah. Yeah. And is he quite good in terms of like, you know, if you go, look, I need a minute. Yeah. Is he quite good at them stepping in?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He can sense it. pretty quickly. Which is great and that's like what you need. How about your family? Like your parents or anyone, are they show any signs? Yeah. They do, right.

Again, not diagnosed, but I'd be shocked if both of my parents weren't on the spectrum. And do you take any form of medication for it or is it all you just, you just, you just. Yeah, there is no, there's no medication. Is there not? No, there is for ADHD. All the work that you do is basically rewiring your brain. What's CB? CBT.

Yeah. Yeah. cognitive behavioral therapy. So when I got diagnosed, he basically said, you know, I can refer you to this. He's like, but you've essentially done this your whole life. It's like it's really common with women. But you've essentially rewired your own brain to mask and cope. Isn't that incredible?

Which is interesting. We can do that to a point. Like, depending on where you are on the spectrum. Yeah. And like depending on where you are on the spectrum and kind of do those things. But I was like, oh, that does kind of make sense. Because when I look at what I was like as a teenager versus now, I was. never look at someone in the eyes.

I'd never touch anyone. Really? Oh my God, no. I know. Do you know what? I forget this. As a northerner that loves a cuddle. When I meet anyone, it doesn't matter who you are, I drag you in straight away.

And I think what I need to start doing is maybe checking first. No, because if someone really isn't, they would just be like, oh, yeah, they'd maybe just let me know. I'd be like, oh, my God. And then I'd be hideously offended. I'd be like, oh, I'm so sorry. Yeah, I'd be able to cuddle me. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I was not a hugger growing up. Really? I am. I love it. It's fine. But I basically did exposure therapy on myself. Yeah, okay, did you? Yeah.

I am going to put myself in situations. I would initiate the hug. Okay. And I realized it. Could you give a good one? Well, wasn't a stiff one. Thank you. I have been rehearsing for like 15 years for this moment.

I've been practicing it all morning. I actually, I've hit. Right, right arm over, left arm. I can do this. I've heard George is a hugger. Yeah. Oh, God. I genuinely like would go into situations go, oh, I'm a hugger.

And then I'd hug. Would you? Yeah. That is so interesting. Because I was like, I, this is holding me back. This is a problem. I've done it with every issue I've seen in myself, even little things like spiders, terrified of spiders. And then year before last, I was like, I'm going to have to touch every spider I see now because this is a problem. This is ruining my life.

I mean, that's really strong of you, though, because not just psychotic. Listen, I didn't want to say it. I'm joking, I'm joking. But do you know what's really great as well? is that like going into motherhood with Junie, yours kind of loaded with all of this information and knowledge that really with a hell of a lot of a lot of things actually, which is lovely, brilliant to you.

Because, you know, like you've got so many aspects of like knowing your self-worth and being a confident woman that is career-driven, but then also breaking the norm with, you know, not conforming to just what women are expected to do, Junie's going to be set for life. I hope so. She'll be started. I hope so.

As long as she has a good time, I'm happy. Next Prime Minister. Yeah. Oh, God. Because you can change a world for us. Maybe. Imagine if I've just predicted the future. Go on June, Miguel.

Go on June. This be part of her campaign speech. Anyway, we've come to the end. Thanks for having me. That was so lovely having you. If anyone wants to listen, to Talia's music, go and give it a listen. She's got a stunning voice.

I was listening to you this morning. Oh, God. Even my husband came over and he's a musician. You went, oh, she's got a nice voice. I'm interviewing her today. But thank you so, so much for coming on. You are a little rave sunshine. Thanks.

That's so sweet. That's a wrap on another episode of Mum's A Word. Thank you so much for joining us today as we were joined by the amazing Tali. Don't forget to leave us a review, follow us on socials at at Mums the Word underscore pod and subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can watch our episodes in full. Just search Mums the Word. Until next time, I'm Georgia Jones and this is Mums the Word. And we'll be back with another episode, same time, same place next week.