Mum's The Word! The Parenting Podcast - SIAN WELBY: Why I Didn't Tell People I Was Pregnant

Episode Date: November 24, 2025

This week on Mum’s The Word, Georgia Jones and Kelsey Parker are joined in the studio by Capital Breakfast and This Morning presenter Sian Welby and she brings all the warmth, wit and honesty you’d expect.Together they dive into:🗣️ Why none of their kids have their accents (Georgia’s northern roots, Sian’s Midlands twang… yet their kids sound totally different!)👶 How becoming a mum has changed Sian in just 16 months🍼 The surprising, and honestly overwhelming, opinions on breastfeeding vs bottle-feeding🤐 And why Sian kept her pregnancy a secret from her bosses until 20 weeksFrom relatable mum moments to navigating the madness of public opinions, this is a funny, open and refreshingly real chat you won’t want to miss.A Create Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, we're back, people, for a brand new episode of Mums the World. I'm Georgia Jones and I'm Kelsey Parker. And do we have an episode for you? We have an extremely special guest to die. Capital Breakfast. One and only. Chan will be. Oh, that's lovely.

I'm in harmony. I mean, I'm not the singer Kelsey is, but I try. so grab a cupper get comfy and let's jump in to a brand new episode of mum's the word shan welcome hi you're gonna make me northern you're gonna bring the north because i'm midlands but around a northerner i go i get more because i get pulled up for it all the time at work if i say like cupboard they all go cupboard yeah for god's sake cup do you know who pulls me up shan my child oh nice yes so what accent has your child got a very posh Chelsea boy accent. So he was born in Chelsea and Westminster and he likes to say that he's a Chelsea boy

and I'm like a sweetheart. You're West London but no he's so posh, isn't he, Kells? Well, yeah, very well spoken and it's bath and grass. See, this is what, because I'm my other half South London. Oh is he? I'm Midlands and I'm thinking what's Ruby's voice going to be? She was born in Chelsea. What she? Same hospital. Same hospital? Good hospital, isn't it? Great. Yeah. Great hospital. Great hospital. Great hospital. Friends, hospitals. I always say it's really weird because obviously me and Danny are both very northern. I'm like, isn't it strange that our child's birth certificate says Chelsea and Westminster?

We're like... But who doesn't really have any twang at all, does it? Who? Oh, Cooper? Yeah. Tommy's rumbly. Did you hear that? Yeah.

That was left on the back. Everyone heard that. She's not eating. These moms don't look after themselves, so we don't have to have a breakfast. No, what did you ask me? Has he got no twang at all? Not a twang. But he's not picked up any of your accent?

He did, up until he went to nursery. Yeah, and then when he started nursery, and then especially when he started school, it was, it was posh. That freaks me out a bit that. Yeah, so I reckon your little girl will be, you know, a bit southern, a bit posh. She might have a bit of both, won't she? She'll have a bit of both, and then she'll lose it and just be in her sleep going,

duck, cubby. Yeah. Back grass. To be it, mine have got northern grandparents and they love. laugh so much when they come out with obviously the South London quotes and twangs and whatever they're like, oh. And then when Norea and I understand, they think, they go, what are they talking? What's Nanny talking about?

We've got to go through the northern. It's so funny. It's just things you don't think about when you have a kid. Like, I always just assumes Cooper would be very Narthing because his parents are, but no. No, yeah, definitely like surroundings, obviously school, teachers. Yeah, all of it. Weird thing it doesn't sound like either of you though. I know.

Like with me, I'm thinking. I'm her the other half is from South London, so I've got a bit of a battle anyway. Yeah, yeah, well, just shows. We're going to lose. And then, so Cooper's seven. Oh, is he seven? I thought he was like, fine.

Oh, my God, how? So he's, he rips it out of me. So he'll be like, it's not bath mummy. It's not bath. Bath mummy, it's bath. I'm like, all right, yeah. It's not. Calm down.

Can't you spell it properly. It's bath, thank you. Having an argument with my child about grammar. Sorry, we've totally digressed already. Chan. How is Shan's 20-25? How has it been? You're meeting me after the hardest week of parenting of my life. Tell us.

Oh, right. Yep. Here we go. Tell us. Just hell. So we work in weird industry anyway, the best of times. No, what are you talking about? It's completely normal. But working in radio because I do breakfast radio, it's early. So I'm up at four, no matter what.

I work for quarter past five, on air at six, do six till ten. And then I'll just talk you through the week. So I did that. Then I did this morning where I do like a little showbiz bit and I did that from 12 till half past. So then at half 12 I went straight back to central London where we had to host an awards due for our boss. Yeah.

That went on to 11pm. Oh, God. I then 11, 12, 1, 2, 3, 4. Yeah, but then I didn't get to sleep until 12. So on 4 hours sleep, I was back basically in work. Then that same day I had a big... You should have slept up there that night. Well, I slept in a half.

hotel but only got four hours. So I was lucky. And also I think when you go to a hotel, sometimes it can't be worse. Because I feel like the first night in the hotel, you're like, I can't sleep. Switch off, switch off and you can't switch off. I couldn't really switch off. I was kind of wired. And then the next day, I happened to be on a shoot that took till 7pm. I always knew that was going to happen. Fiss, you had to be on the shoot looking awake. Awaken and ready and glamorous. And then that finished at 7 and I got home and I literally got into bed at half 8 and thought, this is it, I'm going to sleep. And then Ruby at half nine was screaming. Oh no. Temperature. Jerking. Next thing you know, I'm in A&E because she's, she's done, there's this thing that can

happen when they get a temperature enough is ever happened to you guys where they hit over 40 and their body stopped you. Is that what it's called? Yes, it's almost like having a fit, isn't it. But it's scary the first time. Oh my God. You know, I didn't know what the hell was happening. It's scary every time. Because she was jerky. I was like, Jake, this isn't normal. What's she doing? And I just, I just knew it wasn't worth leaving and we don't live too far from St George's hospital which is sort of further down the road so I was like I'm not even going to mess around trying to get an ambulance I'm just going to drive there yeah we got straight there and um just to they they actually said oh yeah right bringing her in a temperature was sky high they gave her some more bits and bobs and then antibiotics

but we had to stay while they observed her heartbeat it was like through the roof her oxygen levels were low gets to 4 a m i'm looking at the clock and I'm thinking I'm on air I've got to go to work in a minute and it sounds after you think well just phone and ill i probably could have done on any other day but that wednesday we were announcing the jingle bell ball lineup right and i was in every bit of production there were certain bits we had to pre-record and so i was in it there was video footage that was going out there was endless stuff that we'd done that was a well-oiled machine and it would have caused utter chaos because no one would have had time to correct everything no of course not so i was like i'm just going to have to roll straight into work

So I got home, showered, went straight to work. And then I did take off then the Thursday and the Friday. Oh, thank God. Which was, yeah, but then all that week I was dealing with a temperature. You know when it's just constantly shooting up? Yeah. And then you're doing your best to get it back down again. And then she was coughing on top of it all.

I was trying to time the calpul, the ibuprofen. Yeah, because you've got a workout right. She had this at this time. This is that time. That's not giving that at this time. I got very confused at that. I was like, same summer six hours and six to eight, but you can take it every four. I'm like, no, don't give me 10 different.

numbers, I don't know what I'm doing. And then she hates, you know, as a kid, CalPol for me was like a treat. Oh, same. I loved it. Lopped it up. She hates it. She hates all of it.

So she goes, there will come a point where she doesn't hate it. Weird. I promise you, I don't think they ever don't hate antibiotics because it tastes that horrible banana shit, doesn't it? Yeah. But CalPol, eventually, because I remember Cooper, anything you tried to give him,

he was like, absolutely, categorically no. But eventually he'd, and now he'd drink a, I wouldn't ever let him just FYI if he could. Yeah, if he could he would. Yeah, it's weird and so that was just hot like it was just hell. I was sleep deprived I was stressed. Oh God, bless you. I remember thinking that it was

so far and she's 16 months the hardest week I've had I think. Yeah. Yeah. It's so hard as well when they're ill and not being able to do anything. You can't communicate it really. No, when Because she's, is she one and... She's like, 16 months, which is always like, what is that? One year, four months. I hate all that, but it's...

Yeah, one year, four months. So she's still a baby, bless her. And she can communicate certain things, but she can't quite tell me. So it's more that I have to go through, does your head hurt? And she can sort of shake her head and say no, and she can say yes. But I've got to ask the right question. I can already see, even just at 16 months deep, I'm a different mum. And like, not as on edge and not even on edge, because I think,

I'm quite a chilled person, but I definitely felt out my comforts and I didn't have any knowledge at all, really. It's all brand new, isn't it? You don't know what on earth you do it. And then everything else is annoying. And I think even if you've been around loads of kids, it's still completely different having your own child to looking after other people's children.

Did you do any of the like, of the like NCT groups and classes and monkey music? I didn't do any of the classes afterwards actually. Yeah. Because at that point I was kind of like just at home enjoying it. didn't really want to socialise particularly. But I didn't, I don't know whether the NCT classes did much. I don't know if, I don't think, I don't know if you do get taught.

Since then, you sort of think of the things I wish I had known. I almost would have rather had conversations about what to do when it's a fever. And maybe we did and I've forgotten it all. But I think all that stuff, by the time you're in it months later, you've forgotten it anyway. Or like, what do you feel a bit shit after you've had the baby? What if you have that baby and you go, oh, I don't feel that instant surge of, like, love, love. Yeah.

Like, they don't tell you any of those things. Just tell you how to change a nappy and breastfeed. And I think that's it. And then sometimes people don't want to breastfeed. And they're sitting in these NCT classes feeling absolutely devastating at the fact that they've made this decision and they're now being frowned upon. It just happens to one of my best friends. She's like, it's so funny. The minute you say, I'm not breastfeeding, it's like silence, tumblewee.

It's literally like you. said, I mean, because I was going to do Comby, that was always my idea because I knew I'd have to go back to work. You haven't got the time to breastfeed really. Not really, but I was like, I was willing to give it a good crack. My sister breastfed her kids, I'm so like, whatever. You know, I had no opinion

particularly. I didn't realize, though, how much opinion there is on bottle feeding and how it is a bit like you're saying, you're giving them a bottle of whiskey. Oh, that's like acid. Yeah. In the way that people talk about it and do it. And I think, God, it does, it has gone a little bit too far the other way.

I agree. Because I do understand there's a whole, I get the science of breastfeeding and I understand that if you can, fantastic, so many people can't. And like you say, some people just genuinely don't want to. Yeah, yeah. The end of the day, like, as an adult, you cannot tell who is breastfed. Of course you can. You can't. I know, that's the thing. It's like, me and my sister had same feeding journeys from my mum, but Lauren is that and I am something completely different. Yeah. And that's nothing to do with how our feeding journeys were because it was exactly the same and it doesn't deter what you're going to be like as an adult.

Me and Lauren are just made different. Like you're just made different in the womb, right? I would say. Well, yeah, but I get you because even... So it started a conversation with my other half, Jake, his mum, who said, oh yeah, I actually bottle fed both her boys. Yeah. Now, I'd understand if...

Because sometimes you think, oh they're going to become weaklings and whatever Jake never gets ill he's not allergic to anything does have asthma doesn't so all those things that you're kind of worried about that maybe that's the kind of thought processes in your head of don't breastfeed they're going to become like no immune system and all this stuff and actually like I say my other half was bottle fed you would never you never would know as an adult because there's no sign of it there's nothing different about him I breastfed Cooper and he had horrendous exma absolutely horrendous exma allergic to cats like

Poor little allergy kid, horrendous hair fever. But if you'd have a bottle fed, they might have... They probably would have gone, yeah. An opinion going, oh, well. Absolutely. But so I don't think, I mean, look, like I say, I don't want to say it either way because I don't think it should be any shame on how you do it.

I agree. I think what I've opened my eyes to a bit more is why we're so critical on people being good mums because either way, that person is concerned because they're trying to do the best, right? And then you see, I get so much horrible things in my feed sometimes. because I get all the baby stuff, you then all get the sob horrible stories

and the news stories. And I think, God, they're the people to worry about. Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about all these moms trying the best way to feed the kids. Trying their best. Trying their best. Because that's all we want to do, isn't it?

Whether you're bottle feeding, breastfeeding, combing, getting your other half to help, whatever it is. Yeah. It's because you care. You're just trying. Shan, just changing the subjects a little bit. When you found out you were pregnant,

yes. Was that when you... you had just absolutely smashed it on this morning and started presenting on there. The timing was so mad. I mean, because I remember watching, and I remember watching you, like, just shine on this morning. And I was like, she's doing so well.

And then not like after you, like, Sam, I'm having a baby. And I was like, oh, I actually thought, oh, shit. God, I bet she's like, damn it. However, it's not affected anything, has it, really? No, and yes. Charles, like, I'm trying to prove that it doesn't have to, yes, but I mean, don't get wrong, everything's got harder and I'm not as spontaneous and I can't say yes to many things. But then again, it's given me boundaries that I didn't have.

Because sometimes you do say yes to everything. Everything. I spend my life, the only reason I'm probably am where I am is because for years I was just a yes girl. Yeah, yes to everything. I dropped holidays. Do you feel bad? Because I'm that person.

I say yes to everything, so I always think, oh, yeah, but I feel bad. am I letting someone down? Yeah, or a missed opportunity. Yeah, oh, I need to do it. I need to do it. Exactly like that. Because this weird industry we do. Yeah.

But it's true. It's true, isn't it? Where it makes you feel there's a lot of pressure, even if it's subconscious, but it is there. Because if you don't say yes, someone else is. And that's why I think it's a lot harder for mums. I think it is. In that way.

Obviously, even Mark and Ollie that obviously do, hot, they both had babies, but they could literally go back like the next day. Been like, right, you're at home with the baby. I'm going back. And even if, and this is where, you know, I'm sticking up for dads, not all of them want to go straight back, right? And I feel sorry for them. Yeah, they haven't got the choice. Yeah, they haven't got the choice.

But just to play that role, the like you're saying, there's also no stigma for a lad to go back the next day. Whereas I went back after three months and I know, no one was horrible to me and touchwood. I didn't have any immediate comments or anything particularly, but then again... Have you had comments since? No, not that I know of, as in people have had conversations going, oh my God, you went back after three months. So there is an undercurrent of judgment Like I say, I'm very lucky I've got quite positive social media at the minute

I think if I got more famous You get a bit of everything then don't you And you don't know who's gonna Some people want to follow you just to hate you The more you climb the ladder The more they ball you down Exactly And the more of a people's princess you are

The more they want to find something Especially in the UK, not in America No I feel like in America they're like oh my god you're doing amazing they push you right up here we're like you get up to that top and I worry about some people that are sat at the top at the moment I just think just be squeakling yeah yeah as soon as you do something they're going to be like yeah yeah they're coming down and then how to then they cope well exactly and this is I think that's all scary about

this industry because actually I just like the job and fame is to me the side product that's actually the quite scarier side of it that I don't love yeah I like being able to go out, get drunk. No one's filming me. No reporters trying to get the scoop on me. I mean, I'm saying this now and I'm probably opening a can of worms. But what I'm saying is that I live a really normal life. Yeah. TK. Max on the weekend, go to a local pub. I have quite a very low key life. I love the job. The job's mad. The job's cool. I like interviewing people. I like doing all this stuff. But yeah, the fame side terrifies me. And that's because you do then open up your world to mean people. People who don't like.

like you and whatever or not even do it like you just want to say nasty things yeah because they're just dicks look at tattle look at tattle that people actually i know don't go on it i won't look at your name on that no i'm joking joking but there is said that like i really shouldn't go on it okay don't ever go on remember that's me not sleeping now i don't seek out stuff like that but for me i can't believe that there's people out there that have actually put like my friend she actually had her address she moved house and they put her address on there they put her kids school like there's scary how they find these things there's people there that just want to bring you down yeah and there is people out there like that which is and you're

just doing your job that you love so when when right so when you got the call to be like shan wanting to cover this morning you're doing this morning girl were you like did you know at that point you were pregnant yeah I did and they didn't no And I remember thinking, I've got to just, do you know, I genuinely, and at that point, I was at the cusp of it being very obvious. I was having to wear quite clever layers. Yeah. It was just at the point where, because I actually had quite a small bump for quite a long time,

so I got away with it for a while. You're quite a small person. Yeah, and everyone's different on. They had a girl, sometimes that's a different bump, isn't it, and all that? Oh, yeah, I do think that's all crap, though, do you? Do you carry completely different? Do you know what I mean, though? I don't know.

I mean, with boys, you can tell that they're, like, tiny and they've just got a bump, but, like, okay with a radio I was like spread all around like that was just fat and everything everywhere and I was big so yeah it's weird isn't it you're so but whereas you've had a girl and you're saying that you were small so yeah and it was and it was quite a small but maybe it also is the position god knows but long story short I was getting away with it yeah and um although I remember on one of the fittings the um style I was like oh this 10s come small and I was like I can't breathe this I'm a reason she's squishing the baby

She usually cut the back of the trousers. I was wearing like a pink suit and the back had the trousers cut. And I was, I bet she was like being polite, but I was like, I knew why. And also, you don't want to say, she ain't going to go, are you pregnant? No, course not. No. No one's going to say it. No.

So, but I just thought to myself, I've worked so hard to get to. That job was like almost a pipe dream. Oh, yeah. It didn't think I'd ever get to even have a go at that. I bet that was just so on the top of your wish. It really was. Yeah, because everyone's got. something that they'd want to do and for me as a presenter that that show was the pinnacle for me and

I was like is it quite scary when you actually go on and do that it is and it isn't like I think hours of live radio almost had prepared me for it if I'd done it years before it would have been terrified and you'd been doing little bits on there already haven't you exactly I'd been doing competitions then I was doing little segments and so I built up to it which was nice and felt like I knew half the crew yeah and then you know Dermott and that's who I hosted it with that that that that was nice. But yeah, I purposely didn't say anything because I thought, I just want this week to be about whether or not I could do the job. And if I did a good job, I didn't want it to be Sean's pregnant. Yeah, of course. Were you worried, when you first found out you got

the job, did any part of your, oh, this is such bad time in it? In a way, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because it's like anything, you don't know if you can even have kids. You spend motion to try not to. Yeah, I know. And suddenly when you want to, you think, well, I might not be able to. And I had friends that had taken years and so all that was in my head a little bit and I thought I can't wait too long I'm in my late 30s like oh careful I sort of went for it and then yeah typical I thought this is sod's law yeah that all my jobs are coming to an absolute head here yeah like we got a brand new breakfast show Jordan came and joined the show which I do love just going to say do love the morning show oh thank you because now I have to drive to school so it's like we always listen in are you like

in the bong game kind of hour. Seven o'clock, are you? 7.45? Yeah, there's all that kind of. But yeah, so it was all this cool stuff was happening. And I remember I knew Jordan was joining and I thought to myself, even that, I was like, I've got to work out how late I leave it before I leave work. You know, so at this point I'm heavily pregnant, still doing the breakfast.

I'm still getting up early. It's kind of killing me a little bit. But I was like, I've got to. Yeah, and did you struggle in, because obviously them first like 12 weeks, you were so. tired and it's a tiredness that you can't explain to her and you like makes you want to cry I'm just exhausted like I can't explain to you I'm just so tired I'm so tired I'm so tired I want to stop well this is it I think if you ever I wasn't yeah if you ever question how you did that stuff you'd never I reckon I'll look back at my life in 10 years time and go how did I do it you yeah you will

but right now when you're in it you just do it don't you yeah you have to well it's like when when you have a baby and you're running on like two hours sleep yeah and you can't explain to somebody that's never had a child how you're doing it and how you're getting on with life and how you do just get on with it. Functioning, yeah. Just get on with it.

I think that's it and that's kind of always been a bit of my mantra where I don't ever really feel too sorry for myself. I'm like, come on. I'll always find a positive, like you've got a cool job or it's worth it because of this or one day Ruby won't want me to pat her back in the middle of the night and I have to tell myself these positive things

to get me through. You do, do you? I know, I know. I'm having it like that with Cooper when he's like, Mommy, can you come and give me a cuddle in bed? And I'd be like, Cooper, I have just given you a cuddle. And then I have to go in my head. He's not going to want this forever, Georgia. Come on. They're not even going to want to talk to you.

When I try and talk to my brothers, I'm like, one went out at the weekend. And I was like, oh, he's 20. So, what happened at the weekend? Yeah, but he's like that weekend, mom's even worse. Mom sends me in to buy the gossip back. She's like, I'm happy that he's going out and doing this, but I just want to know what happened. I'm like, he's not going to tell us.

No. Meet any girls? Grunting. This is why you two are lucky that you've got girls because boys, when they get older, they just turn to grow. Yeah, but you're also going to have, you're going to be the mother of the girl

that then becomes the mother, whereas I'm going to be the mother-in-law. Yeah, but that's why. You've got to be the cool mother-in-law that's like, yeah, I'm cool and easy. I don't care what my son's doing. Oh, my best mate, it's like you're going to be the mother-in-law from hell. Do you think you will?

Only if I don't like a, Well, I was going to say, you've just got to make sure it goes out with someone that you love. Yeah, I'm like, no, not this one, Cooper. But even if she doesn't, you just have to... Yeah, I'm like, I can't. But then all of that, I mean, imagine it's... That side of it's actually maybe worse with a daughter.

You're like, imagine if she brought home like an older guy. I'd be like, what are you doing? Oh, yeah. My baby. Yeah, she's my little girl. I always think of those things and think, God, that whole stuff's going to be weird, isn't it? Oh, my God, yeah.

Actually, that's a tricky one with girls. I think when you know, they're starting to have sex for them. I don't. I can't imagine. Whereas with a boy, I don't think that's quite as bad. I don't know why. No, I get you. It doesn't feel as bad for me. Whereas with a girl. I still think it, I think at the, when it comes, George, I think you will be like. I probably will, yeah. Like, yeah, because there'll always be your tiny little baby. But you'll be worrying, but you'll be worrying about the girl. Yeah. When he's having sex. About her getting pregnant. What about everything? And is he treating her okay? Is he being disrespectful?

Oh, God. That's the one thing I'll have to say you do not get a girl pregnant. Be careful. I think kids are a bit... Yeah, but I think they are way more with it. Like, it seems it, doesn't it? Like, kids seem way more... They don't drink anymore.

They don't, they don't... They don't... Go out to do anything. No. They don't know the pain we all went through with our six-inch heels to get in a club. Yeah. And also going out drinking, rolling in,

and going to work. Going to work. Oh yeah. They don't do that. I worked a new look for years. Did you? Like, so I did the whole retail thing for so long. See, retail's quite a good one though because I worked in a deli and a deli on a hand smell.

Oh, that makes the cheeses. Oh, good Lord. Yeah, I know. So then, how did you navigate? What did you do? How did you tell everyone? Well, I thought to myself, if I just get to that second scan, is it 20 weeks? Yeah.

I thought if I, so I think I was about 19 weeks or something I did this morning and I was like, if I just get to 20 weeks, then I know the baby's all right, and then I feel comfortable just telling everyone, because I thought, I can't tell this morning bosses before I've told the capital bosses, and there was this knock on a face. Oh, it's a bit like politics, yeah. Like Game of Thrones are like. Yeah. It's like, you can't do this, and someone's going to get offended, you're going to offend someone

and right away. Yeah, and everyone's going to flap and panic and what we're going to do and everything. What's she going to do? Breakfast is over. Yeah, so it's just a lot of things. Isn't it matter that that's how we think? Like, because things do. exist when we go on maternity but you don't think it's going to and you don't think your job's

going to be there. Yeah, I do wish that, I wish that that thought wasn't, I wish we didn't have to have that thought. Yeah. Oh, you're almost going in, bracing yourself for an inconvenience to the boss. You're an inconvenient. You're an inconvenient. But it's your life and it's everything that you want. And it's so natural and so normal. Because you've chosen to procreate, you're an absolute inconvenient. How dare you? Even if it's in your own head and the bosses were all fantastic but in my own head I'm there going oh god I've got to tell them and you imagine like women that just get a new job and think and I'm pregnant and they must the panic of going I can't tell that was you well it was it was it just doesn't it just doesn't feel that but you get a new job

and you think I can't tell them because now I'm I'm a totally convenient yeah I'm gonna let everyone down down I'm a double wage because they're paying somebody to cover while I'm off and all this kind of stuff and you think god I wish the world needs to get a grip a little bit because There's not enough respect on procreating is like literally the thing we're here to do. And yet it's treat. I still think there is stigma and treated like, oh, well, this is not good for the workplace. Yeah, it is. It is.

For moms, I think it's just so hard for us. I just, I do think it's harder for women. Yeah. It is. The workplace isn't set up for us to. Work and have babies. Feel comfortable to have babies and feel completely relaxed. And I don't think they understand that we have got that.

going for her head going, well, I do really want a baby because I want someone to love and do whatever. But also, I do love my job as well. And I do want to work here. And I love this what I'm doing. So please can just ever think... Stay the same, but I am going to be off for nine months. But you... And so you only gave yourself three months. Three months off because, again... Was that pressure? Dun-tun-da. Well, it's both in it. It's... Pressure from yourself. It's pressure from yourself. It's a deep down, I've worked in this industry long enough to know. Yeah. I'm not saying anyone did pressure me, because they didn't. No one did. Everyone said, come back when you're ready. Yeah. I know this industry well

enough. But you were like nine months later. Ah, she thought she'd have nine months off. Yeah. Well, it's the same as content created. You know your breakfast. It's like it. You know your breakfast show. It's the same as anyone who is freelance, anyone that's running their own business. You cannot take that much time off without something suffering. Yeah. And so deep down and also there was a lot of things going in my head. We'd just started a brand new breakfast show. I wanted to get it up and running with, I wanted to be working with Jordan and getting, you know, getting to knowing and forming our vibe and all this kind of stuff. I thought, if I leave it too long, it's going to be such a hard thing to come back into. To break it back into you. You didn't want to miss out. No. And that's

the thing, isn't it? It's the phombo. You're listening in every morning like, huh. Well, it is a bit show shit without me. What? Yeah. Oh, look at you having a night time. It's really funny. It's going to be funny. It's going to be funny. It's charming again. You're going to check in on you all? Are you all right? I've had a really bad night with Ruby. She was up 20 times. Don't. But yeah, honestly, you know, you just know you have to. You've got to crack on. You've got to get back to work. And it, do you know what? It was the longest I've ever had off work. So three months to me felt like a long time. And because as well, yes, okay, it's still a disgustingly early start. But I was really strict on canceling anything else.

So I just did the breakfast show. And I was done at 10. Yeah. So at the end, of the day, yes, it's not like going back to a nine to five or a night shifts or whatever. I literally did my morning show and then I just came home to Ruby. And so what was quite nice, when we got into a good rhythm, I'd get back, I'd nap at the same time in that one to three window where this is a nap for a long time. I was napping. Do you still nap? Do you ever go back a nap? Sometimes, yeah, if I can.

If I can. Oh, yeah, I love a day nap. Same. I can't switch off why I just couldn't do it. but I guess if you are working, if you're getting up at four, the only beauty about getting up at four is you can always sleep, and it's kind of a weird addictive feeling that when I'm on holiday, I don't have it, and I can't explain it,

but sometimes I miss it, because when I'm this tired, like we're talking to you now, but then I could get out there, and you could say, do you want to sleep on that sofa, and I would just be able to go? So would I. It's mad, isn't it? I mean, I have a seven-year-old. I don't have any reason to nap like that.

And you don't get up before a cook in the morning for breakfast. Show me and Joina. But I could, yeah. Yeah, but you'll be a seven-year-old. be exhausted in different ways that you don't realize mentally yeah that's it i just couldn't i can't switch off there's no way that i could have a nap during the day you just don't stop though no yeah i'm just like she is on yeah but then at night i'd get tired say nine o'clock i'm like done for the day the phone is going to the side and i'm not doing anything else by nine o'clock yeah that's nice

no i'm the same i have to say i'm a half eight girl i need to be face washed in my pajamas by half eight. Yeah, I want to be in bed at half eight on my phone for about half an hour and then sleep at night. I want to be asleep at nine. Give ourselves all that blue light just before bed.

Yeah, it's the worst when you fall asleep on the sofa, though. Me and Danny did it last night and that was it, we were wide awake. We both got into bed and I'm like, right, well... Yes, because that's what pisses me off. How come it's so comfortable and so glorious when you're on the sofa?

It's the best sleep you'll ever have. Yeah. And then when you go, well, I better go to bed. Totally ruins it. Ping, wide awake. yeah totally ruins it normally got to do the teeth brush yeah it's all the argument it's all those bits and then you're awake yeah then you are like so did your other half take on the rule of yes being at home with ruby then yeah he did right you can get this thing now called shared parental leave where if it makes more sense for the whatever your setup is

the other person to go back then you can so did you do the first three and then he did the last Like, how long do you get now, a year? I don't know, but, well, he ended up taking a full year off. Right. And just one way or another, it ended up being a year. But he took the three months off to start with. No, he got the two weeks classic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, then he went back.

So we did the first two together, then he went back. I did the three months on my own while he worked, and then, and then we swatched back, and I went back, but I was doing afternoons. And what was his work like? Well, he was a producer at heart. He doesn't wear there now, actually. But they were very good. Because they sort of knew us both. We both worked there 10 years. Oh, that's good. So it was, they were quite flexible with you. Yeah, they were very good with it. Because they knew, we've known him a long time, me a long time. Neither was ever, you know, like, never taking the piss, never had time off. Yeah. So I knew the setup. And also probably, equally wanted me back on the show. So it worked for them as well. Yeah. Well, yeah, of course. They were like, yeah, you can go, mate, because we won't shine back.

You're replaceable. Shams the face. But yeah, so bless him. He was brilliant and he did do it. So it was, but that was nice for him, you know, because he was quite a nervous, he's more anxious than me in general

and more of a worrier. And so at the beginning, you know, something like giving medicine or whatever, he would have been nervous about and now he's just brilliant because he's done it all and he had to and he's had loads of time. And I think that's lovely for him

that he's got that time. Same. Because you don't get the time. No, I said you'll never get that again. When you both are under pressure to work, you don't get the time. No. Well, this is it about modern life as well. Most people have to have two incomes.

So most people are both back at work and life isn't set up for that. No. It really isn't. No, it's not. Especially when you've not got family nearby. Like, me and Cal's always talk about our village. And like, sometimes you have to make a village because your village is in a village. 300 miles away.

Well, we're same. Yeah. Yeah. And you just don't have that. Did you guys not have? any family nearby. His mum is nearby and, well, his mum and dad, but both of them work, whereas it's slightly more annoying

because my mum's retired and so is my dad, but they live in the Midlands. So where you're very selfish of them. I know, how dare they? So whereas, like, you, I definitely know that my mum as well would just have done anything to help. Yeah. And she almost needs her own boundaries

because she would go above and beyond. I think that's it with grandparents sometimes, isn't it? because they're like, yeah, I can come for a week, no problem. Yeah, I'm thinking, mum. Yeah, it's like, I don't think you can. But she's one of those that would always be overly, like, helpful or giving. So I did miss that because I think she would have been amazing if she could have been near. And obviously she feels bad because she's not. There's nothing either of us can do.

No, there's not. And as long as, like, you've got that mutual understanding and nobody puts any pressure on because I always feel that with my mum as well, she's like, I feel terrible. I'm like, me and Lauren, my sister, haven't said that we're, we're annoyed that you live up north, so don't put that pressure on yourself. No. Because we're not, so don't you do it?

Don't be a martyr. I know, don't be a martyr. It's hard, though, in it for them because I suppose they just want to do it all. They want to be there. They also want to look after their little girls, don't they? Of course. You know, we've just given birth.

I'm saying that, I do think that once you have kids, you have kids, the grandkids become, like I feel like I'm non-existent. Yes, I don't know if I, I'm relevant at all anymore. I think it's all about Ruby. Oh, I mean, I've realised Dad got the son he never had, which was me, because he thought I was going to be a boy,

and then he was like, oh, this is disappointing, two girls. And then he gets three boys from me and my sister, and he's like, absolutely buzzing. Oh, yeah, so he's going to be like full granddad mode. Oh, he's going to love it. Full granddad mode, yeah, absolutely so. So have you ever felt like any mum pressures? Has there ever been anything you've been like, oh, this is, this is hard.

This is not what I expected mumming to be. I think, I just remember those early weeks. I think it's those weeks when you are, you're trying, because I've always trusted my gut and I've always been quite a logical, you know, problem solver. So when I couldn't, I was like flapping a little bit. I was like, oh God, I have nothing to draw on here. I've got no information. You're not telling me anything.

Yes, come on brain, function. What do we do? And so then when you're in those mum groups and then there's also loads of everything's on Instagram and it's telling you different things. And the things I remember that now I would just tell any new mum to just don't stress about. Tommy time was one of the most ridiculous. It felt like some sort of regime when I was. Oh, yeah. It was literally as if they would never learn to support their own neck ever.

Yeah. She would be a jelly deal. She's never going to react to anything. Oh, my God. It's so. You know, when you think about, they were like, you know, this brand new baby that's tiny, she was only like six pound three when she was born. And there's this pressure to be shoving them on the front, on a carpet.

They're going, ah, they hate it. Ruby hated being on the tummy. Oh, Cooper hated it. Hated it. But I think to myself, where is this pressure come from? A baby's going to learn to sit up. But I do think Instagram and everything like that is just too much. There's too much information and there's too many people chiming in with, you know, Ruby is different to Aurelia,

who's different to Cooper, who's different. different to Bodie who's different to every, do you what I mean? They're all different and each child is an individual. So like that might work for your family over there, but he ain't working for us. Ruby don't like tummy time, right? No, she didn't. And like in the group chat of the, you know, the NCT group, it would be like, well, we've done 40 minutes today. And I'd be like, can't bear it. What? And I was thinking, what is going on here? This is madness. But really, genuinely, when I had Ruby, it was one of the biggest obsessions. It was in, even midwives were saying tummy time and it was this real thing. So that was one.

The other thing that obviously pressure was the whole breastfeeding versus bottle feeding that felt like I had to go like under the counter like that don't say I have some of the formula please carry out in paper bag just some like car park

and exchanging 10 bottles of the other cow and gate in the car park yeah so that was ridiculous and I remember thinking oh that that just needs to chill out I wouldn't stress about that stuff anymore and actually

something like when I switch do you know what the other stress was, is them, that whole thing about getting colic and the baby is going to be up all night and crying forever. There's always that fear that you're not going to be able to comfort them and they're going to have colic. And the thing that got me really badly was when I switched from trying to breastfeed to bottle feed, I just had a bottle that just didn't work with Ruby.

It was too fast. And even though the teat was like made for newborns, I didn't know any different. There are other brands that do even tinier ones. Yeah. And also, you don't know if you did breastfeed, you don't know what your milk. flows actually like. Some babies only feed for five minutes because the letdowns like, you can hear him

but obviously if you've not got a fast letdown like I don't think I have so then when you do the bottle feed it's almost gagging. But also it's like bottle boot camp as well when they're like no I'm not taking a bottle like the baby's just like no just fuck off I'm not taking a bottle. Yeah Coupil wouldn't take a bottle

well I think as well if you've breastfed first they don't really like it do they? Because they tell you they're going don't try a bottle for six weeks because of nipple confused And I obviously, as a first time, mum was like, oh my God, I mustn't confuse it with my nipple and a teeth, because they're so, so identical. So I didn't.

And honestly, I made a rod for my own back. Because it was feel so alien. Because he was like, well, the hell is this, you shoving in my mouth. And he only wanted me, because he only ever had me. Yeah. And then put... And I do think boys are worse for that as well. And I was on my knees as this right.

I was like, all I want to do is go and get my roots done. Yeah. But I can't, because I can't be aware. from him for longer than half an hour because of the feeding. Because of the feeding routine. In fact, I think even just talking about that, because when I did four days of basically trying to breastfeed

and she couldn't latch is the reason why I didn't in the end. Yeah. And those four days that could sound like anyone that doesn't have kids yet might be like four days. You gave up after four days. No. Four days felt like forever. Because it is relentless. Because she wasn't latching, that was

because she'd be hungry. Yeah, and your boobs then sore because the latches. She's not happening. It's not happening. I do think that there needs to be more to help mums though, because like that, like, I actually was at a hospital where, and I have the most fucking roofless mum that you could possibly have, literally my mum came in, got Aurelia, got my boom and went, squished, and done it, and helped me. But I needed that because I think I would have been like, I can't do it.

But there was a team at the hospital that actually were employed that came around and helped people breastfeed. They've got rid of that service now. have they got rid of it yeah that's really bad they've got rid of that team that came around and actually supported women because there's no support and we're looking at instagram for support and then you're looking at mary going oh she's finding it easy yeah well for me a bit like you're saying i was lucky enough that one of the midwives was actually brilliant and she was she was doing all that thing to breastfeed this is what i was having to do it was like baby in right arm squeeze right teeth use left arm to push your head onto teeth

And it was like this crab. And I was there tense like this, going, ah, feed. And the baby can't do it. And also it's actually your nipples as well. Like if you haven't got pointed out nipples, the baby has got to suck the nipple down. Yeah. Which is painful.

Tom is like I'm in my element. We've gone so deep because I've never really spoke about my nipples. This is in this much detail. The baby doesn't need to draw the nipple down. If you've never breastfed before, which none of us have with our first baby. But that pain and. bleeding and whatever else.

Like, it is painful. It's the, and you're like that, that pain when they first go on you, that, I can't breathe. I can't breathe. Did you? Did you get, and then relax? I remember, and no one told you about this either.

When you feed for the first time, you can feel things sucking up inside. Did you like that? It all contracts down, doesn't it? Oh my God. I remember it feeling weird. Maybe if she wasn't latching properly. I got a few moments where I felt the latch

because it does feel different. Yeah, I knew when she'd latch because it. But it was to do my nipers. shape and all this kind of stuff because they're quite small. Yeah. Well, that's the thing. That was part of the problem. Come on, show you nips.

Let's just talk about. Let's just get this over and done with it. But yeah, so then this is what I would say to anyone that's going through this particular thing where I was having to do this really awkward thing every single time. And even then she'd lag. You had the rugby hold and the neck twist and the whatever the ostrich maneuver. And then she'd come off like within seconds. It never really ever was working.

So then I was pumping, putting it in the fridge. By the time it had gone in the fridge, it was time to, and I'd pumped, it was time to feed again. Yeah. But I still couldn't get it to latch. So now I was having to warm up the milk that I'd put in the fridge. You're like a little machine. And you never get storage. But people that actually do like full-time pumping, I'm like, hats off to you.

Fair play. It's hard. So you weren't actually feeding, but you never had time off from getting your milk out. No, because it was like another. It was like constantly draining the milk. Imagine if you're milk, it's not having twins, basically. Oh, yeah, because you're constantly trying to get ahead of yourself and I never could. You know they say like crying over spilt milk. I'll never forget when I like spilt one of them out of the packet.

And you do cry. Oh, and you do. You're like, no, don't. That took me 20 minutes or whatever it took or 40 minutes. And with the machine, go, eh, eh. Honestly, it's quite triggering that sound, actually. Can we not? I think like you're saying about you just wanted your roots.

And that is almost as quickly, something as simple as that can tip you over the edge because you feel a bit, you do feel a bit gross you're sort of walking around you've got these minging bras on tits are flapping up you're leaking you've got these suction things and babies crying your vagina's fucks I had a C-sections on these ugly scar and all this stuff and then yes at one point you just think I just need a spray tan my hair doing all my nails doing my friends all went out on a hendoo and I was bridesmaid at the this is when I had a radio I was bridesmaid at the wedding I knew I had to fit into this dress as well and they're all out on a hentoo and I was like, to my mum, this is so rubbish.

Oh, my friends are out and I'm here and I got her in the boom. And it's just, she was like, Kelsey, get grip. Oh, but it's when you have those tears that are just, they come and you're like, I don't know why I'm crying, but I have. It's so sad. I had days of that where I couldn't explain why I was crying and Jake would be like, are you all right? I'm like, I'm okay, but I'm just crying.

I was a bit like, I don't know if I'm okay actually. I'm sobbing. Am I okay? Am I okay? Is this like, is this normal? Yes, it's on Instagram. No, it's like, ten reasons why this is not normal. Yeah, yeah, you're dying. Yeah, you're a terrible mother.

Cheers, great. Brilliant. It's two days in and you are shit at your dog. Yeah. No, but that's the thing, like they don't tell you in NCT. When your milk comes in, you are going to have waves of emotion or when your hormones start doing whatever your hormones are starting to do. But going back to your NCT comment as well, that I think,

even with like they need to say to you like you said you might have this baby and not feel that love because your body has gone through so much birth is that the biggest thing that you can do for women and you're not not you're not going to feel the same and you probably will never be that same person again like you've gone through so much your hormones everything they they don't explain that to you no they don't know i did nCT i'm not really i don't really like an ncc She was being told medical things. Of course you didn't. Obviously they're going, no, disagree.

Sorry, I'm going to give the speech now. So you'll sit down. I'm going to tell everybody. If anyone likes to have a look at my homeopathic. Who wants the kit? Anyone like my kit? And no remedy. Available to purchase.

By on my Instagram. We are digressing up. Anyway. I mean, Sham. I've had a right old Nata, but we need. at the end. Oh, I don't. It's been therapy for me. I know. I know. I feel normal. I feel seen. Yeah, just because when you're on other mumms, you actually do feel a bit more like, oh, thank God. It's not just me. It's normal. I know, and that's so it. And it's like, when you very first

have your child, you don't know those NCT girls that you're in a group WhatsApp with. And they're all trying to prove that they're doing all right. Yeah. So you've got all these people saying oh my my little girl slept seven till seven you're like no she didn't she didn't sleep seven till seven you're a liar call her out call her out the group chat you're a liar yeah but you believe it yeah course so then you're like oh if i was in an nc t group and i had arralia i would have literally messaging being like she don't stop crime she literally does not stop crying erania wasn't happy that she was born in baby full she would have like to just come straight in as like toddler yeah that's it she's like skip that stage i'm

I'm not happy. I can't talk. I mean, she could talk at six months. Like, that is just so Ray. But literally, she could say, like, mom, dad at six months. Like, she was trying to get her She'd have been awful on these NCT group. She'd been, I don't know, sorry, is anyone else's baby talking to six months? No, but I didn't even know that this is not really normal. But Ralea did not stop crying. She cried and cried, and my mom said four kids, and my mom went, I've never known a baby to cry so much. And never, it just was one of those things. Well, I've been, it's colic. Collick, that's what I'm saying.

My mum basically thinks colic is a crying baby. I don't know what colic is. Do you know what? I don't know if deep down I do, it's just chronic wind, isn't it? It's chronic wind, but my mum would say it's just a crying baby. That's what Diane's take would be.

It's just a crying baby. If I had chronic wins. And Orelia, Tom drove her up the boat's way back again. She just did not stop crime. He was ringing the breastfeeding clinic. He was reading this. Like, really, I'm going, you're actually embarrassing me here, Tom.

but she did not stop crying. You do get why it's a form of torture, though. Yes, because that sound actually physically affects you, doesn't it? It's horrible feeling. Even now, if I'm out somewhere and I hear a bit, like a newborn, like properly crying,

it does something to me. I agree. I remember when, because I had breastfed until people were six months old, whenever I went out, I often went to like soft play and all that jazz. And if ever there's a baby crying,

my nipples, would literally go and my milk would just all start coming out yeah it is amazing really isn't it that is insane she had the heavy flow

I was a heavy flow you had the heavy teeth I was a heavy I could do you know what I could have been I could have been one of those women milk made yeah supply milk to other people

yeah what did that yeah I think you can wet nanny or something yeah a wet nurse wet nurse what's not a wet nanny she's talking about selling it

on the black market over there I said, no, not, I promise. I don't know where all those pines went that were in my freezer. I don't know how much is that really big house? How did we've been chosen? No, I told you're just like,

yeah, yeah. Anybody, anybody for some milk? That's what you did want to the pumping sound, that's why. I got back the memories. God, seven years of that. No, I'm joking. Um, but anyway, Sean, it's been a pleasure.

It's been on you on. My cheeks hurt. My smile in. much. It's been wonderful. That's a wrap, Kels. That's a wrap. On another episode. Thank you so much, Shan.

It's been wonderful. I've loved it. Don't forget to leave us a review. Follow us on our socials at At Mums the Word underscore pod. And subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can actually see this in real, in full. You can see the tits being wrapped. You don't want to miss it. Shand doesn't actually show in it.

Sorry. Or do I? You have to watch. Just search Mum's the word So I've been Georgie Jones And I've been Kelsey Parker

And we'll be back With another episode Same time Same place Next week Next week