Murder In America - EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)

Episode Date: May 23, 2025

In 2012, a violent crime rocked the community of Aurora, Colorado. A heavily armed mass killer had attacked a midnight showing of the newly released film, “The Dark Knight Rises”, and had slaughtered 12 people and injured 70 more in cold blood. But when the smoke cleared and investigators began to piece together what led up to the shooting, they couldn’t believe what they were discovering. - Listen to our new show, "THE CONSPIRACY FILES"!: -Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/5IY9nWD2MYDzlSYP48nRPl -Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-conspiracy-files/id1752719844 -Amazon/Audible - https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/ab1ade99-740c-46ae-8028-b2cf41eabf58/the-conspiracy-files -Pandora - https://www.pandora.com/podcast/the-conspiracy-files/PC:1001089101 -iHeart - https://iheart.com/podcast/186907423/ -PocketCast - https://pca.st/dpdyrcca -CastBox - https://castbox.fm/channel/id6193084?country=us - Stay Connected: Join the Murder in America fam in our free Facebook Community for a behind-the-scenes look, more insights and current events in the true crime world: https://www.facebook.com/groups/4365229996855701 If you want even more Murder in America bonus content, including ad-free episodes, come join us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/murderinamerica Instagram: http://instagram.com/murderinamerica/ Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/people/Murder-in-America-Podcast/100086268848682/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/MurderInAmerica TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theparanormalfiles and https://www.tiktok.com/@courtneybrowen Feeling spooky? Follow Colin as he travels state to state (and even country to country!) investigating claims of extreme paranormal activity and visiting famous haunted locations on The Paranormal Files Official Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheParanormalFilesOfficialChannel - (c) BLOOD IN THE SINK PRODUCTIONS 2025 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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We go into great detail with every case that we cover and do our best to bring viewers even deeper into the stories by utilizing disturbing audio and sound effects. Trigger warnings from the stories we cover may include violence, rape, murder, and offenses against children. This podcast is not for everyone. You have been warned. Movies have been a safe haven for over 100 years. They can make us feel sad, happy, scared, hopeful. They can make us cry and laugh and feel connected to those around us. It's a way to escape reality for a bit, jumping into a whole different world,

which was exactly the case for nearly 400 people in Aurora, Colorado on July 20th, 2012. It was the midnight premiere of the highly anticipated Batman film, the dark night rises. Everyone in the theater grabbed their popcorn and their candy, and as the lights turned out, they completely immersed themselves in the film before them. But soon enough, they would all witness something horrific. Except it wouldn't be on a screen. It would be right there in front of them in that very theater. About 18 minutes into the movie, a 24-year-old named James Holmes would enter the theater through an exit door. Before anyone even realized what was happening, he would unleash a hill of bullets into the crowd. By the time he was

finished and the smoke cleared from the room, the dark floors were drenched in blood, popcorn, shoes, and bodies. In the end, more than 70 people were injured and 13 people would lose their lives. And this horrific act was not only a tragedy but a cultural shift because one day movies were a safe place, and then they weren't. So this is the story of the Dark Night Rises mass shooting. In this episode, we are going to tell you everything that led up to this tragic event, including the life of the shooter James Holmes. But if you don't want to hear about that, make sure to join us next week.

In that episode, we will walk you through everything that happened that day. We will talk about the victims, the aftermath of the shooting, and the fate of the man responsible. I'm Courtney Browne. And I'm Colin Brown. And you're listening to Murder in America. Most of the mass shooting episodes we cover, we start the episode off by telling you about someone's unfortunate upbringing. A lot of times, the men who go on to commit these shootings come from broken homes.

Their childhoods are riddled with trauma, abuse, and neglect. And from an early age, the warning signs are right there. Sometimes these children will hurt animals, start fire. They'll draw bloody pictures of people being killed. Then, when they grow up, you'll often see them posting concerning things online. They'll cause problems in school. And finally, when that person commits the shooting, most people who knew them aren't surprised. In fact, sometimes the people around them will tell you that they saw it coming all along.

But the story we have for you today isn't like that. The childhood of James Holmes was so incredibly normal, which in itself is unsettling. As humans, we find comfort when we can place blame on something. Not that a shitty childhood is ever an excuse for why these people go on to commit such atrocities, but at least we can look into their past for answers. However, in the case of James Holmes, we can't really do that. Sometimes parents can do everything right. They can give their children a good education, put them in therapy, and give them all the advantages to live a good and productive life.

But still, something goes wrong. Mental health is a complicated topic. And we do want to state that someone's mental health condition is not an excuse for slaughtering a room full of people. But it does play a part in this story. However, before we get into that, we have to tell you the story of James' parents. Robert Holmes was described as an intelligent, very analytical man. He had graduated from Stanford with a bachelor's in mathematics and earned his master's at UCLA.

Then from there, he went on to the University of Berkeley to get his Ph.D. in statistics. In the 70s, Robert was in his late 20s, and while at Berkeley, he crossed paths with a woman named Arlene. She was everything he had ever wanted in a woman. At the time, she was earning her English degree. she was very hard working, driven, and she shared the same core values as Robert. It was clear from the very beginning that Robert and Arlene would be a very successful couple, and they were. In 1981, after Arlene graduated, she started working as a staff writer at the Berkeley Gazette.

That same year, Robert graduated with his PhD after writing his dissertation, contributions to the theory of parametric estimation in randomly censored data. and for the first few years of their relationship, everything was going really well. Then, finally, on August 10, 1985, the two got married in Los Angeles. Following their marriage in 1986, Robert and Arlene moved to San Diego. Arlene began to write for the Imperial Beach Star News, and her husband, who usually went by Bob, worked as a statistician for the Navy Personnel Center. They had a really great life together.

They were successful, they had a nice house on the beach, and plenty of money. The only thing missing from their lives were children. Both Bob and Arlene always knew that they wanted to be parents, and they fulfilled that dream on December 13, 1987. Arlene went into labor and ended up needing a C-section. It was definitely not an easy birth, but after several long hours, their son, James Egan Holmes, had finally made his way into the day. the world. Many parents recall the first time they held their baby and looked into their eyes.

You experience a love that you never thought possible, and in that moment you vowed to love and protect them for the rest of their life. I'm sure Bob and Arlene experienced this exact same moment with James. However, they could have never imagined the life he would go on to live. All children are innocent, and James was no exception. His parents were completely over the moon after his birth. After leaving the hospital, he was brought back to his parents' home in the affluent neighborhood of Rancho Peneskitos, just north of San Diego. It's a community that provides everything you could want to raise a family. There's the magic of nearby beaches with their towering sunset-colored cliffs and warm surf. There are miles and miles of hiking trails,

biking trails and even horseback riding trails that wind through the Chaparro hills. There's even Christmas Card Lane, a path of over 200 houses that decorate for Christmas each year with elaborate displays that illuminate the streets with holiday cheer. So that, coupled with security and attentive parents, James Holmes was set up with a really great life. In addition, it seemed as if his parents were really compatible, which is essential when having a peaceful home. Now, at the time, Arlene was working as a registered nurse, but she was also still a writer for the Imperial Beach Star News. She would write in the newspaper's life section. In certain articles, she would write about her husband's silly quirks and gifts they would give

each other over the years. In 1987, she wrote a piece titled, She Has Found Him the Perfect Gift at Last. It read, I have learned that cute but feckless Valentine's gifts are not the way to go. When you are married to a practical man, be practical. This year, I played it safe. Bob is out of town this week on business. But when he returns, he's going to just love his new pastel flowered skirt and blouse ensemble. Arlene's articles were humorous and they gave a small glimpse into their lives.

James would later describe his parents' relationship by saying, you could see the love between them. They showed it. And as a child, he had no problem doing the same thing. When James was five years old, Bob and Arlene had their second child, a daughter named Chris. and according to his family, he absolutely loved his little sister. One day, shortly after her birth, he even approached his mom and asked if she could help him write a letter. It read, quote,

Dear Chris, I love you, Chris. I wish you could play basketball and soccer with me. I wish you could play light bright. You have soft, cute skin. You're a happy baby. I wish you could play marbles with me. You can when you grow up. You need four more years.

Love Jimmy, your brother. According to Arlene, right after the letter was written, James insisted on feeding her a bottle and reading it to her. It was the kind of relationship every parent hopes to see between their children. And in the beginning, the Holmes family was so happy. Later on, when asked what he remembered about his childhood, James' response was, quote, lots of hugs. It was clear he was growing up in a good, stable, and loving home.

But like with any child, there were some bumps along the road. For instance, in his early childhood years, James had a few irrational fears. But what kid doesn't? The first fear of his were that, quote, thugs were going to sneak into his window at night and kidnap him. And his second fear is what he referred to as nail ghosts. According to James, they were ghosts that would hammer nails through the wall by his bed at night, trying to poke him. and he was so scared of these ghosts poking him with these nails that he would sleep in the middle of his bed far away from the wall.

Now, some sources claim that these were early hallucinations that James was having, but having irrational fears like this when you're small is pretty normal. I remember when I was a kid, I watched an episode of goosebumps, and I thought a ventriloquist dummy was going to come out of the book that I had in my closet and attack me in my sleep. So the fact that James was afraid of being kidnapped, and these nail ghosts isn't really alarming. And according to everyone that knew him, he was a very normal kid.

Neither his parents nor anyone else who was around him has recalled him having unusual behavior around this age. But soon enough, the Holmes family decided to move from the home James grew up in. He was just seven years old when they packed up and moved to Salinas, California, about 450 miles north of San Diego. At the time, Bob's mother was ill, and the family wanted to be closer to her so that they could help. And that's the kind of family that James was raised in.

From the get-go, being together, being there for each other, and making memories was the most important thing. Now, according to them, the move from San Diego to Salinas was a pretty smooth transition for them, as the kids were still young. And again, they continued to have a really good life there. Their family would often visit their aunt and uncle in Chico, where they would explore the foothills of the mighty Sierra Nevada Mountains. They would fish, ride horses, and have bonfires.

At their new home in Salinas, they spent a lot of quality time together. Every single night they sat together and ate dinner at the table, no matter what was going on in their lives. One of James' fondest memories was when his mom would cook spaghetti. Arlene and the kids would throw wads of noodles at the cabinets to see if it was ready. If the spaghetti stuck, it was al dente. If it didn't, it had to go for a little long. longer. James would later laugh recalling this memory because, for whatever reason, every time the noodles would stick to the cabinets, paint would peel off with it. But even so, they continued

this little tradition. James also said that his parents attended every single event that he and his sister had growing up. Whether it was concerts or sporting events, they would always be there to support their children. Bob even coached James's soccer team. He would later say, quote, quote, Jimmy was the happiest when he was playing soccer, end quote. So to him, even though he was working all the time and taking care of his ailing mother, it was important for him to be there for these special moments. Growing up, James was not a withdrawn kid. He was involved in a lot of extracurricular activities like soccer, basketball, track, and martial arts.

By no means was he a standout athlete, but according to his coaches and teammates, He was a team player who was a really good sport and always took losing with grace, which is how a lot of the neighborhood kids described him as well. The Holmes household was located at the end of a cul-de-sac, and James was always running around with friends having a good time. Their backyard had this long stretch of vacant land with a gully where they would all play capture the flag and flashlight tag. They would dig pits, sell them with water, and then jump in,

pretending that they were in a water park. James was, in many ways, one of the core members of this group of kids. As an adult, he remembered them fondly, and the feeling was mutual. According to everyone who knew him around this age, James was well-liked by kids, teachers, and adults alike. He was even known to have a lot of empathy for a kid his age. A neighbor, Catherine Barrett, would later talk about a time when all of the neighborhood kids went to a water park together.

They had been waiting in line forever, but finally they had made it to the front. However, when they did, one of the workers told James' little sister that she was too small to ride the ride. But instead of leaving his sister behind, James told her, that's okay, I'll stay with you. He then put his arm around Chris and walked her back down while the other kids went on the ride. Many neighbors recounted that Chris looked up to James and that even when she was too little, he always made it a point to include her in their games. But things weren't always perfect between the siblings. In fact, it was reported that when James was eight years old, his parents brought him to see a therapist after he threw a toy at his baby's sister.

His parents said that he would often throw things when he got upset, so they wanted to make sure everything was okay with him. They also told the therapist that James was very Nintendo-oriented. But again, these things aren't screaming future killer. Now, throwing things when you're mad obviously isn't good, but, kids that age don't know how to regulate their emotions. So tantrums are pretty common. So as being obsessed with your Nintendo. But still, his parents wanted James to work through these problems

to ensure that he was getting the guidance he needed. And I think this just goes to show how present Bob and Arlene were in their children's lives. They saw a problem and they wanted to help. However, James would later say that his family wasn't really wanting to talk about their problems or their feelings. Bob would later say of their family, quote, we were more scientific, non-emotional, end quote. Which is probably why they took James to the therapist. They knew that they weren't good at talking through these kind of things,

so they turned to a professional. Now, his therapist would later know that James was, quote, quiet and non-communicative, end quote. But they also said he was polite, pleasant, and alert. Now, they did give him a diet, diagnosis of oppositional defiant disorder. But apparently this was pretty common back then to give out as this generic condition so that the therapy sessions were covered by insurance. No criteria had to be met for it to be used and it was essentially a placeholder for any behavioral issues

a parent was concerned about. But other than that, James's therapist noted that there were no severe concerns about him. And according to James' parents, that first bit of therapy seemed to work. After just three sessions, Arlene told the therapist that James's behavior had really improved and that he was being much more present with his family. For the next few years, James seemed to be doing really well. He was an excellent student at Castraville Elementary and was always on the honor roll. One of his teachers, Anne Heston, remembered him vividly. She told several newspapers that he was intelligent, smiling, active, helpful, and sweet. In addition, she noted that he wasn't extroverted but he also wasn't really introverted either and he was actually pretty popular with his

fellow students another teacher paul carer stated that james was balanced like a renaissance kid meaning he was very well-rounded and curious now he was in mr carr's classroom from the age of 10 to 11 and he showed zero red flags that year he and another student were given special privilege to create a class website using a computer code that they had become enamored with learning about. This was in 1998 when coding wasn't on most kids' radar whatsoever. So James Holmes was a student who really stood out. However, according to James himself, it's around this time when dark thoughts began to infiltrate his mind. James would later recall that sometime between 1998 and 2000, when he was about 11 to 13 years old, he started having these vague,

reoccurring images of people being killed, and they would just pop in his head out of nowhere. He said that sometimes it would happen multiple times a week, other times it wouldn't happen at all. In James' own words, he knew the thoughts weren't normal, but he tried not to worry about them. Now, what James was experiencing at the time is called intrusive thoughts, which are essentially unwanted thoughts or images that pop into your brain seemingly out of nowhere. Maybe you're driving and you randomly think about crashing your car. You're in a crowded theater and you think about standing up and screaming in the middle of the performance. Now it doesn't mean you're actually going to do these things or even that you want to.

It's just a random thought that pops into your head. According to a 2014 study, 94% of Americans have at some point experienced an intrusive thought. But some can be a lot darker, like, think, about killing someone. Some people even suffer from intrusive sexual thoughts, like engaging in sexual behavior with a child or an animal. These thoughts can elicit a sense of panic in some individuals, which can sometimes create a feedback loop, resulting in them having them more often. And that frequently happens with people who suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder. And as you'll

learn, James did have symptoms of OCD. But later, Later on, when James Holmes was asked why he never told anyone about these intrusive thoughts, he simply responds, quote, they were private. Now, in the year 2000, shortly after these violent thoughts began to pop into James' head, he got some unfortunate news. His parents decided that they were ready to move back to San Diego. This time, it was Arlene's parents who were sick. And luckily for them, Bob was even offered a job in San Diego,

so it was an opportunity they couldn't pass up. But this time around, moving was a lot harder for James. At 12 years old, his whole life was in Salinas. He already had his friend group established. He was familiar with his school, and he was involved in different sports. But one night, his parents sat them down and told them they were leaving. And to make matters worse, there were only two weeks left of school, and James wouldn't be able to finish out the school year with his classmates.

No end-of-the-year parties, no summer neighborhood hangouts or anything. He would now have to start his life over in a city where he didn't know anyone. And making friends at that age can be hard. James' life was about to completely change. A new home, new neighborhood, a new school. He was worried. James would later say that he tried to voice his frustrations to his family, but they didn't listen. He said he felt ignored, like nothing he said mattered.

And before they knew it, they were packing up and leaving their life behind. According to close friends and family, as the moving trucks pulled away, his little sister Chris was screaming and sobbing. James had tears streaming down his face. He would later say that along the drive to San Diego, he was so upset about moving, he even grabbed a piece of cardboard from a box and began to saw at his wrist with it,

but no one in the car knew what he was doing. When his mother saw the injury later on, she shrugged it off, thinking it was. a paper cut. James never told them that he tried to hurt himself. Later on, when asked why he didn't tell his parents, he responded, quote, just because I wanted to keep it private, end quote. And it seems like that's how his family operated. Negative feelings were kept private. Now this is not an attack on Arlene or Bob, because in reality, that's true for a lot of families. Feelings are kept inside. For some kids, it's a minor issue, but for others, it turns into a problem that follows them all of their life and evolves into something much, much bigger.

After moving to San Diego, James was really struggling. Without any friends in the city, he spent that summer completely isolated. He would later say that other than spending time with his family, he mostly sat alone in his bedroom closet reading books. He also played video games and watched television. His mother encouraged him to know. to play with the neighborhood kids, but he didn't show any interest. Then soon enough, the school year began. James was starting the seventh grade. Now, according to him, he did make some friends who invited him to play a game called Magic the Gathering. He was grateful to be invited into the group, but he said that he felt really awkward around them. One of the boys from this group would later say, Jimmy was very quiet, very soft-spoken, not warming up or even talking to you until you get to know him.

James himself said that he was painfully awkward around this time. He said that he often turned to video games for an escape, and at home, his parents noted that he was irritable and unwilling to talk to them, which is pretty common around this age. But his mother Arlene said that he couldn't even talk to people on the telephone. Every time the phone was handed over to him, he would just freeze up, unwilling to speak. She would even make him scripts to use during the phone calls, but still he couldn't do it. Now, even though kids this age go through these awkward periods, James' parents were a little concerned.

Their daughter, Chris, was thriving. She was social and making friends, but James was clearly struggling. So like they did in the past, his parents decided to get him some professional help. They ended up calling an agency called SciCare, and they were put into contact with a social worker named Mel Lipsy. and she would end up meeting with James and his parents 14 different times. Now, the note she took from their sessions together have been lost, but James admitted that he never opened up about the intrusive thoughts he was having. He would later talk about these sessions in his journal, writing, quote,

Family Therapy with Mel revealed nothing as to not appear weak amongst family, end quote. So clearly, he didn't want his family to know what was going on with him, had James revealed any of his feelings at the time, his life may have gone in a different direction, but he didn't. And he did a pretty good job at making it seem like everything was okay. Even though his parents had expressed concern about his isolated behavior,

they were told by a lot of people that that's just what it's like raising a teenager. But beneath the surface, it was much darker. The intrusive thoughts James had been having since he was a kid continued. But it's around his high school year when they started branching out a bit. In addition to seeing people getting killed, he said he would sometimes picture the world getting wiped out with an atomic blast. Now, Dr. William Reed would later spend a lot of time with James Holmes. And in his book, A Dark Night and Aurora, he talked about these nuclear intrusive thoughts.

And to him, they represented James' fear of letting his anger take control. Dr. Reed wrote, to be angry at her, he told me. If a kid gets really angry at his mother, she could treat you differently and maybe ignore you. So clearly, James had a problem with expressing himself. But holding everything in wasn't helping either. Anytime his brain wasn't occupied,

these intrusive thoughts slipped into his psyche, consuming him. Now, up until this point, his intrusive thoughts never involved him. He would just see images of death, violence, and destruction. but soon enough, he started having thoughts of being the cause of that death, violence, and destruction, that he was the person attacking or killing people. He would later say that he knew something was deeply wrong with him,

but he didn't want people to know that, so he kept it hidden away. Many people silently suffering with mental health problems, intrusive thoughts, suicidal ideation, or homicidal ideation, think that keeping their thoughts inside will make them more. less real. But in reality, that only allows them to fester. That festering breeds shame, resentment, and hatred, which is why it is so important to share these things with a professional. But on the outside, when people crossed paths with James Holmes, no one suspected a thing. He made good grades in school, he had a small group of friends, and he appeared to be a normal kid. His old friend, Alex

Van Horn, would later say, quote, there's people you see in high school that you worry about sometimes. He wasn't one of those. Eventually, James would even graduate high school at the top of his class. He had also been accepted into a competitive internship at the San Diego Stock Institute, where he would be taking part in a neurobiology program. But his advisor said, quote, communicating with James was difficult. I frequently had to ask yes or no questions to get responses from him. And here is actually a short video of him, this internship. All right.

Our next speaker is James Holm. He wants to know how graphumes are mediated in spaceful frequency channels. Now at that point, James had already earned a full ride to the University of California, Riverside, where he was going to major in neuroscience. From appearances, he had a very successful future ahead of him. When James started college at UC Riverside, moved into the Pentland Hills Residence Hall, a freshman dorm building. and while there he really thrived.

His grades were phenomenal, and he even met a group of friends that he grew close to. Ryan LaCroix, one of his best friends during his years at UC Riverside, said that James was shy, but that he fit in well with their friend group. They spent most of their time together playing Mario Kart, watching Lost as it premiered every week, and going on fun trips together. James went snowboarding, out to dinner, on hikes, and played video games late into the night with his friends. While his friends liked playing Halo, they recalled that James wasn't a fan of aggressive first-person shooters.

Instead, he preferred strategy games like World of Warcraft 3. And again, the people around him thought he was pretty normal. Two of James' female friends noted that he was a bit strange, but never in a way that made anyone feel threatened. A former roommate said that he would often lie in bed at night not sleeping, just staring at the ceiling, unmoving as he sat there in deep thought. but nothing that they noticed was extremely alarming. With the distractions of school, his friends, and video games, James was largely able to keep his violent thoughts at bay. However, he would later say that when left alone,

the thoughts would creep back into the foreground. One specific thought that often came into his mind was about humanity as a whole, and how he believed everyone would be better off dead. James said that he ruminated on this thought for years. starting around 2006 all the way until 2010. In his exact words, he would later say this. I suffer. Other people suffer.

We'd all be better off if everyone on earth dies. Hey everybody, Courtney and I have a favor to ask of you. If you love murder in America, you love our show. Please leave us a five-star review wherever you listen to your podcasts, whether that's Apple Podcasts, Spotify. If you love our show and you want to help us grow, definitely consider leaving us a five-star review. Also, it helps the show so much when people share out links to our program. So if you're listening and you're loving what we're doing here, share us on your Instagram story, shout us out on X, post one of our shows on your Facebook,

and let the world, your friends, your family know that you're listening to Murder in America. It seriously helps us so much. It helps us grow the show. We couldn't do this without all of you listening at home. Seriously, thank you. But let's get back to the story. During his time at UC Riverside, James was in the honors program. And one requirement for that program was that he had to complete a certain number of volunteer hours per year.

Everyone in the program was given this big list of options to choose from. And James chose to volunteer at an orphanage in Tijuana, Mexico. While there, he bought gifts for the children, he ate with them every day, and he played different sports. which is kind of crazy to think about. From what we know about James Holmes today, you wouldn't think that he'd like children, but apparently he did. In fact, during his undergrad program,

he also worked as a camp counselor at Camp Max Strauss, which is a residential program for underprivileged youth. Now, one of the kids that James worked with that summer actually had schizophrenia, and James would later say, quote, these kids were heavily medicated, but this did not say, solve their problems, only create new ones. The medication changed them from highly energetic

creative kids to lax beings who slept through activities. I wanted to help them, but I couldn't. End quote. Now according to his co-workers, superiors, and the campers, James was a phenomenal counselor. They did have to urge him to be a bit more outgoing, but other than that, they said he was positive, goofy with the kids, and great at making them feel safe. Which is strangely what people said about James for a lot of his life. When he was a child, he would help lead the younger kids into Halloween haunted houses, comforting them and showing them that it wasn't that scary. He didn't get joy out of watching them scared.

Then, as he got older, he routinely chose to work or volunteer with kids. Now, interestingly, years down the road after James had been, arrested. He even expressed concern when he saw that some of his victims were children. The signs that victim services unit, children something. Uh-huh. Yeah, well, yeah, what about that? There wasn't any children hurt. What is it? Now, obviously, we'll get more into that in part two, but by 2010, James graduated in the top 1% of his college class. His GPA was 3.949, the kind of grade that will get you into any graduate school of your

choosing, at least in theory. Following graduation, James applied to eight graduate schools with doctoral neuroscience programs. He had several reference letters from past professors, including one that read, A very effective group leader brings a great amount of intellectual and emotional maturity into the classroom. However, out of the eight schools he applied to, James was rejected. by all of them. And it was largely due to his essay that he wrote. These essays are supposed to give a glimpse into the student, their personality, beliefs, and goals in life. But for James, it gave a glimpse

into his psyche. In his essay, he spoke at length about using clairvoyance to solve challenging scientific equations. At one point, he stated that he invoked the infinite vastness of indefinite knowledge. And the colleges he applied to were not impressed. Now, there was one staffer at Montaigneur, state who considered accepting James, but apparently James had left them an unsettling voicemail. And from there, they went down a different direction. But this entire experience was really hard on James. He hadn't taken the rejection well. And from there, he would go on a dark downward spiral.

Disheartened by the rejections, James decided to return to his parents' house in San Diego. And for the first few weeks, he spent all of his time sleeping in and playing video games. Now I'm sure at first his mom let him relax a little. After all, he had just earned his degree after a lot of hard work. But after a few weeks, Arlene told James that he had to go get a job. She wasn't going to let him just rot away in his room all summer. So he eventually found work at MaraCal Incorporated, a supplement factory. James worked from 4 p.m. to 2 a.m. 5 days a week.

and he was in charge of operating a pill-coding machine. Now, his coworkers at this job said that he was definitely strange. One coworker said that it almost seemed like he had a mental condition. Another said that she called him the giggler, as he was always known to giggle throughout his shift. At this point, James was around 23 years old. On average, men with schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder are diagnosed in their late teens to early 20s,

and symptoms that may have been flickering throughout the teenage years often become hard to ignore by this age. According to some psychiatrists, they believe that this is exactly what was happening to James at that time, and his family did have a history of schizophrenia. However, there are other professionals who don't believe that James was suffering from schizophrenia, but from severe OCD instead.

Now, James worked at this job for about three months during the summer and fall of 2010, But soon enough, his parents started urging him to go back to school. After all, that was his goal all along. So from there, he started the application process once again. In one of his essays he submitted, James writes the following. I've always been fascinated by the complexities of a long lost thought, seemingly arising out of nowhere into a stream of awareness.

I have an unquenchable curiosity, a strong desire to know and explore the unknown, and a need to persist against the odds. And this time around, he was far more successful. Of the six schools he applied to, three moved forward with his application, the University of Iowa, the University of Illinois, and the University of Colorado. Now, the University of Iowa asked to have an in-person interview with James

to see if he was a good fit for their program. But after their interview, a psychology professor told the administration, mission board, quote, not to admit him under any circumstances, end quote. There aren't any details as to why this professor was so adamant about this, but that very decision may have prevented a massacre from happening in that town. However, the University of Colorado was impressed with James Holmes. In fact, he was one of six students that they picked to be a part of this program, and they offered him $26,000 a year in financial aid.

So for James, it was an easy decision. He would attend the University of Colorado, nestled in the town of Aurora. That acceptance, that single chance moment in time, is what led to Aurora being forever associated with one of the most deadly mass shootings in history. James' story is brimming with moments like these, where his path diverges in two directions. And sadly, he repeatedly descended down the darker path

over and over and over. When James made the move to Aurora, Colorado, I'm sure he was filled with hope. This was a new chapter, the start of what would hopefully lead him to a successful career in neuroscience. And like we mentioned, James did really well in school. His undergrad years had been a very pleasant experience for him.

He had friends, he had made good members, memories and school was easy for him however he had no idea that graduate school would be the complete opposite experience when classes began that year a lot of the students were eager to start off strong they got familiar with the other students in the class introduced themselves to their professors and did everything they were supposed to do but not James he seemed like he didn't really care to be there or that he was too smart to have to try one classmate would later say what struck me was that he was kind of nonchalant.

He just seemed too cool to be there. He kicked back in his chair and seemed very relaxed in a very stressful situation. I noticed that he was not engaged with people around him. We went around the table to introduce ourselves, and he made a weird, awkward joke. According to his professors and classmates, James would often come to class early, usually wearing jeans and some type of t-shirt. But he wasn't very friendly. Another student said, quote,

he would basically communicate with me in one word sentences. He always seemed to be off in his own world, which did not involve other people as far as I could tell, end quote. It was also said that during these classes, while everyone else was taking vigorous notes on the lesson, James wouldn't. He would just kind of stare off.

One of his professors even said that James appeared so withdrawn that he wasn't even sure he was actually called, comprehending anything, when he would get called on in class. Everyone said he began his answers with a long drawn out. After a few weeks, James started leaving his labs early. He wove nonsensical jokes into his presentations, skipped class, and seemed completely unconcerned with the tasks given to him.

Now, you might just be able to get away with that in undergrad, but not here. James couldn't just study right before the exam and ace the class. In graduate school, there are endless presentations, group projects, and lab rotations. You have to put in the work to succeed, and James wasn't doing that. For his entire life, he had been really good at school, and what was once a fulfilling distraction for him was clearly no longer working. In his book, A Dark Night in Aurora, Dr. Reed suggests, maybe James was impatient. Maybe his studies weren't moving him fast enough towards his goal of figuring out what was

wrong with him. But during this time, James also had another distraction, his very first girlfriend. While attending the University of Colorado, James crossed paths with a student named Gargi Dada. He saw her one day in one of his classes, and he thought she was beautiful. Soon enough, the two would strike up a conversation, and that's when James learned that she wasn't just pretty, but wildly intelligent as well. They also had a lot of similar interests. Now, Gargi ended up inviting him to a study session that week. They exchanged emails, but that night, James sent her his phone number.

He said, quote, if you text me, I will tell you an amazingly best ever world's greatest knock-knock joke. Now, something that Gargy said was that James was super witty and fun over texts, but in person he was completely different. He would try to make jokes, but they often didn't land because of how awkward. he was. But nonetheless, she decided to go out with him. Their first date was at a horror film festival. And during it, James told her that he had been with other girls before. But that wasn't true. Gargi was his first girlfriend and his first sexual experience. And from there, he quickly fell in love. Good hair days do more than we give them credit for. When your hair feels healthy, you show up differently. You feel more confident, more relaxed. And you're not constantly

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I mean, I remember specifically one just crazy time when we had jet skis and we took them out, we had rented them for the day, and we took them out. on this lake and somehow something got on the engine of the jet ski, mine stalled, my dad stalled and my mom and sister had to come rescue us because we floated to shore on the other side of the lake. We've got some hilarious pictures from that day. But it's just one of those memories that I don't want to let die. And aura frames can help keep those moments alive. So basically an aura frame is like a virtual frame that can display photos and videos from anywhere. You can upload to the frame. You can share new photos. You can constantly change.

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A once-monthly treatment for moderate-tiss disappear eczema. After an initial four-month-month-longer dosing phase, about four-in-10 people taking ebb-glis achieved itch relief and clear or almost clear skin at 16 weeks. And most of those people maintain skin that's still more clear at one year with monthly dosing. Ebglis, Librikizumab LBKZ, a 250 milligram per 2 milliliter injection is a prescription medicine used to treat adults and children 12 years of age and older who weigh at least 88 pounds or 40 kilograms with moderate to severe eczema. Also called atopic dermatitis that is not well controlled with prescription therapies used on the skin or topicals or who cannot use topical therapies. Ebglis can be used with or without topical corticosteroids. Don't use if you're allergic to ebbglis.

Allergic reactions can occur that can be severe. Eye problems can occur. Tell your doctor if you have new or worsening eye problems. You should not receive a live vaccine when treated with Ebbglis. Before starting Ebbglis, tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection. Ask your doctor about Ebbglis.com or call 1-800 lilyr-X or 1-800-545-9709. Now, when he and Gargi weren't in class, they hung out at James's apartment, a small one-bedroom on the third floor of an apartment building near campus.

This apartment building would, in a matter of months, become a literal ticking time bomb. But from October 2011 to February 2012, it was James and Garggy's little escape. They watched SNL reruns, had sex, played video games, and ate dinner together. On dates, they sometimes visited the Century 16 movie theater, the same theater that would become the center of James' demented plan. But despite having a love interest for the very first time in his life, James was still struggling with his mental health. His social anxiety had gotten pretty bad.

and because of that, he was having a hard time with his presentations in class. Then on top of everything, it seemed like his homicidal thoughts had gotten worse. By January of 2012, James even texted his friend Ben, telling him that he was having delusions. Now, Ben was open to the conversation and he was supportive, but James wouldn't really open up. Ben started asking him, well, are you seeing things? Are you hearing things? James admitted that he wasn't having any auditory hallucinations, but he was seeing things. So Ben then asked him, well, what are you seeing? What delusions are you having? But James's response was chilling. He told his friend that it was a quote, secret.

Now we know that James started having thoughts of killing people years prior, images that would pop up in his head. But according to James, for the first time in his life, they weren't. just images in his head anymore. He was actually seeing these violent things and the spaces around him, right there in the room with him. He mainly claims to have seen shadows, including a shadow that was, quote, juggling heads. By February 2012, James was still happy and in love with his girlfriend Gargi. For Valentine's Day, he even set up this nice evening together. He lit candles in his apartment, he bought her carnations, and he cooked her a nice chicken dish. then after they watched Netflix together.

For James, the relationship was going so well, he even sent an email to his parents telling them about his girlfriend and the Valentine's Day they spent together. But Garggy wasn't feeling the same. She would later say that over the Christmas break, she had started questioning her relationship with James. From the beginning, she told him that she didn't want anything serious, that she was just interested in a casual relationship.

But over time, James' feelings were growing stronger. It was clear that he liked her way more than she liked him. So that month, she asked James if they could pull back the reins a little bit. She didn't want him completely out of her life. She was even still okay with having a sexual relationship with one another, but she didn't exactly want to be boyfriend and girlfriend. And not wanting to lose her, James agreed to be friends with benefits. But he would later say that this was a huge loss for him.

Afterwards, he became even more depressed and said, My mind was kind of falling apart. One day, he opened up his journal and wrote that he had lost his last battle with biology, his last battle of falling in love. Now, after their breakup, Gargy and James continue to see each other and talk frequently. But the things James was saying were concerning her. So much so, she urged him to see a psychiatrist. So that March, James reached out to the Student Health Service Center

and made an appointment with a social worker named Margaret Roof. During their first session on March 16th, Margaret sat down with James and asked him about what was going on in his life. What symptoms are you having? But like many times before, James didn't want to open up. He even told her that he didn't want to tell her about the thoughts he was having because, quote, you would have to report me, end quote. But finally, after a while, he admitted that he, quote, wanted to kill people. Now, I always thought that if someone says this in therapy, the professional is supposed to report it. But apparently, James told her that he didn't have anyone in particular that he wanted to kill.

And since there was no specific target, she didn't have to report it. Following their session, Dr. Roth wrote that James, quote, had no dangerousness. She also wrote, quote, It was very hard to interview him, as he would just stare and take a long time to answer. He said it was very hard for him to come in. Now immediately after their first session, Dr. Roth emailed the senior psychiatrist, Dr. Lenn Fenton. In her email to her, she wrote, quote,

He is the most anxious guy I have ever seen and has symptoms of OCD. But most concerning is that he has thoughts of killing people, though I do not think he is dangerous. He said he did not want to tell me everything he was experiencing, as I might have to report it. end quote. So from there, Dr. Len Fenton agreed to meet with James on March 21st. But before their session, James would participate in some typical college activities. On March 17th, he and Garggy went to a bar to celebrate St. Patty's Day.

While there, everyone was drinking and having a good time, including James. That is, until a guy walked up to Gargi. Now, keep in mind, they are no longer together. But upon seeing this, James got upset. He even confronted the guy. But Gargi quickly shut that down. She told him, We are not boyfriend and girlfriend,

so you can't control who I talk to. And James was upset about this. A few days later, on March 21st, he would have his first session with Dr. Fenton. Here's her talking about her first impression of him. Well, he did indeed seem very nervous. He was very quiet. Look like your average grad student jeans or khakis

and a just sort of nonscript t-shirt or button down. So during their first appointment, Dr. Fenton was mostly trying to understand James' history, what symptoms he had. The first session is usually just getting a broad understanding and establishing a rapport. But that was hard for James. He didn't like opening up.

However, he did mention that he had just been dumped. Dr. Fenton then asked him about his past relationships, and James said the following. I don't have relationships with people. They have relationships with me. After a while, the conversation shifts over to the homicidal thoughts he had been having. Thoughts he had for a while now. According to Dr. Fenton, James tells her this.

My OCD symptoms are the worst they have been. The solution to the biological problem is eliminating the problem. Homicide. But you can't kill everyone so it's not an effect. effective solution. Dr. Fenton said she didn't understand what he meant by biological problem, but considering he said it wouldn't be an effective solution, she figured he didn't actually plan on killing anyone.

And she asks him that. Are these homicidal thoughts directed at anyone in particular? No. Are you planning to kill anyone? No. She asks him, do you ever have thoughts about hurting yourself? No. wouldn't hurt myself.

Next, Dr. Fenton asks James if he would consider taking medication. James says he would be open to it. So she decided to prescribe him an antidepressant called Zoloft. Now James hadn't told her he was depressed, but Dr. Fenton noted that he did appear to be a little sad. And she said that the drug also helps with social anxiety and OCD, which she thought he had both. And like always, she put him on a low dose to make sure he could tolerate it. Now this drug takes a few weeks to kick in. And because James was having anxiety, she also decided to prescribe him

something that would work right away. It was a benz-o that relieves anxiety called colonapin. James mentioned that he had a lab presentation coming up that he was anxious about. So Dr. Fenton said that the colonnipin should help with that. But she also said that in the back of her mind. She believed that if these drugs didn't help, that she might have to prescribe James an antipsychotic. Based on some of the statements he made, she couldn't tell if James was just a little odd or if he had some sort of personality disorder like schizoid. If that was the case, then an antipsychotic would work better, but she would have to have a few more sessions with him to make that determination. So at the end of their appointment, she told James to take the medication she

prescribed him, and they scheduled an appointment together for the following week. Dr. Fenton said that leaving that session, she did not believe James was going to act out in any aggressive or violent way. She said that James was definitely guarded. It was clear he had a hard time opening up, and when he spoke, he usually gave very short answers. But in her mind, he was not dangerous. However, she couldn't have been more wrong. Following their appointment, James wrote in his notebook. He wrote that in these therapy sessions, he would continue deflecting any incriminating information. He also kept talking to his ex Gargi. He told her that he was doing poorly in his classes, that he skipped an assignment, and that his professor got pissed off at him. Then during

one conversation, James started talking to Gargi about how valuable life is. He said that taking someone's life away took away their experiences, memories, and their potential. But then he went on to say that taking someone's life gave you human capital. Gargi said, what do you mean by that? How do you get human capital from taking someone's life? And James said, you'll have a more meaningful life. So his girlfriend asked, well, if taking someone's life adds more to your life, then why don't you kill me? And James said, if I did that, I would get caught and then I couldn't go kill more people. But he went on to say that he wasn't inherently evil and that going to kill people was his plan B. On March 25th, he and Gargi had the following text conversation.

Well, what I feel like doing is evil, so can't do that. What do you feel like doing? Video games are the next best thing through escapism. What is so evil that you want to do? Kill people, of course. Killing people is too much effort. You'll end up locked up. Most people are not worth what might happen to you because of the act.

That's why you kill many people. Now soon after this, on March 27th, James would have his next session with Dr. Fenton. And this one was supposed to be a shorter one, just 20 minutes to see how the medications were working. James reportedly shows up on time. He's wearing his normal clothes and acting the same as he did before. And when he sits down, Dr. Fenton asks him, How are you doing? James says the following. My OCD symptoms, the thoughts of killing people, haven't changed.

And my anxiety is pretty much the same too. I took the colonopin before my lab because I was anxious about it, but it didn't help. It just made me really tired. I don't want to take it anymore. Dr. Fenton told him that he didn't have to take it anymore. Instead, she wanted him to try propranolaw, which is good for performance anxiety. It can help if your heart starts racing or you feel jittery, and she felt like it would be a better fit.

So she prescribed him that, and they scheduled another meeting for the following week to see if the medications were working. After leaving Dr. Fenton's office that day, James writes another journal entry. It reads, The mind is a prison of uncertainty. Trillions of cells guarded for eternity.

Oh, where art thou, master key? Destroy the mind and be free. A few days after this on April 2nd, James texts Gargi and tells her that he can't, can't be friends with her anymore. It's too hard for him. Gargi responds, okay. The following day on April 3rd, James sits through a class on schizophrenia, something he's very interested in. When quizzed on the material, he does really well. And then on that same day, he meets with Dr. Fenton again. Like all the times before, Dr. Fenton said he showed up on time, and it seemed as

if nothing had changed. When he sat down, she asked him how he was doing. and he responds with the following. The propranol seems to be working. I do feel a little less anxious, but I'm having a hard time remembering things. Dr. Fenton suggested that they lower his dose. James continues. I am feeling a little tired throughout the day.

Dr. Fenton told him that he might be feeling tired from the Zoloft, which can be a side effect. So she told him to start taking it at night. Now, this was another shorter session. Dr. Fenton didn't ask him any more about his homicidal thoughts, but she did suggest another medication, an antipsychotic called Syracill, which helps a lot with anxiety. However, James was worried that it would be too sedating. So instead, she told him to continue with his medication, and they scheduled another meeting two weeks later.

Now, it's around this time when James' classmates began to notice a difference in him. They said he stopped smiling. He was no longer making those weird jokes in class. And if you were to have taken a look into James's journal at the time, you would have seen some disturbing entries. One read as follows. The obsession to kill since I was a kid with age has become more and more realistic. First obsession, onset, started more than 10 years ago.

So, anyways, that's my mind. It's broken. I tried to fix my mind. I made it my sole conviction, but using something that's broken to fix itself proved insurmountable. Neurosciences seemed like the way to go, but it didn't pan out. In order to rehabilitate the broken mind, my soul must be eviscerated. I could not sacrifice my soul to have a normal mind.

Despite my biological shortcomings, I fought and fought. There is one more battle to fight with life. To face death. Embrace a longstanding hatred of mankind and overcome all fear. Certain death. Around this time, James starts talking to another girl in one of his classes. On April 9th, he messaged her, Hey, it's Jimmy James.

You sick of our professor yet? The girl asked how he was doing in the class, and James responded, Not great. The following week on April 17th, he would meet with Dr. Fenton again. He walked into her office, took a seat, and like all the times before, she asked how he was doing.

Do you feel depressed or suicidal? She asked. No. Are you having any more homicidal thoughts? Well, I broke up with my girlfriend and I'm doing okay, but I did have an increase in my obsessive thoughts. What are those obsessive thoughts you're having? I'm having an increase of obsessive thoughts about women. I have three categories of obsessive thoughts.

One that has to do with women, one that has to do with men, and one that has to do with everyone. Now, Dr. Fenton said that she tried to press him further on this, but he wouldn't really elaborate. But she said that based on what she observed of James, she didn't think he would respond well to keep pushing for answers, so she moved on. Interestingly, Dr. Fenton said that it's here, where James started talking about the meaning of life. He wanted to know what she thought the meaning of life was. But Dr. Fenton didn't want to talk about her philosophies. These sessions were about him, so she didn't answer his question.

But to her surprise, he started to get really upset. He even angrily asked her. Why won't you tell me? Dr. Fenton wrote that he was having psychotic level thinking, meaning his thoughts aren't reality. From what she was observing, she also believed that he had some sort of social anxiety disorder, but she also got the feeling like if she said one wrong thing,

something that upset James, that he would just stop treatment altogether. So she played it safe. But again, she said that even though he had, admitted to having these homicidal ideations, he was still showing no signs that he planned to act on them. So, she adjusted his meds and planned the next session. But later that week, as Dr. Fenton was sitting at her computer, she received an email. You see, she had accidentally written down the wrong last name on James's prescription. She put James Hughes instead of James Holmes.

In the email to her, James lets her know about the mistake. and he writes the following. An inconvenience, Fenton. But something else she noticed in the email was this weird symbol she didn't recognize. She decided she would ask him about it in their next session. Now that week, James went on with his life

as he normally did. He also extended the lease on his apartment for another six months. A few days after that, he texted that new girl in class and said, Why do you got to distract me with those short shorts? That weekend, James asked the girl if she wanted to go on a hike with him, and she agreed. But she would later say that he was extremely awkward during it.

But then on May 1st, James arrived at Dr. Fenton's office for his next session, and she starts it off by asking how he's doing. Good. Now, she would later say that she didn't think he was being genuine. Kind of like when you run into someone you know in public, and they ask how you're doing, you just say you're doing good, even if you're not. James tells Dr. Fenton that his ex-girlfriend texted him again and that she's going through the five stages of grief.

Right now, he said she's in the depression stage. And again, this is interesting because James is acting like he broke up with her when it was the opposite. He also said he texted his ex-girlfriend the following message. The thorn in my side is well worth the rose. I don't see the glass. I see beyond the glass. class. James starts talking about how he's been interested in another girl, that girl he took

on the hike. And he says it's dangerous because she's in his neuroscience class and that there's only six students total. So from here, Dr. Fenton once again asks about his past relationships. James tells her that he's dated multiple women, but that it usually only lasts for about four months and then he would just stop talking to them. But again, this was a lot of. lie. James had only been with one other girl and she ended things with him. But next, the conversation drifted off to his classes. James said that he had some important exams coming up. In one class, his lab wasn't working. He wasn't getting any data. So he said he would have to, quote, make up some bullshit, end quote. Now, Dr. Fenton was happy that James was talking, but her mind goes to

that email he sent earlier that week, the one that had that weird symbol. So she apologizes for the mix-up with his prescription, and then she asks him, what was that symbol you included in your email? But James doesn't want to tell her, so she pushes a little more. What was it? But again, he won't say. Dr. Fenton said that it took several minutes of going back and forth for him to finally tell her what it was. and he says the following. The cues on the symbol were fists. It represented me punching you in the eye. Violence. Is that what you need to hear?

Dr. Fenton doesn't know what to think, but then he follows it up with this. I know. It was dumb. I shouldn't have done that. Clearly, there's something going on with James if he's sending symbols about punching her. So next, Dr. Fenton brings up his homicidal ideations. But again, James isn't forthcoming. However, he does say this.

You'd see it in a utilitarian way. Dr. Fenton didn't understand. Can you elaborate on that? She asks. You'd want to eliminate that. You'd have to see it that way. But she still didn't understand. However, she still said that he gave no indication

that he planned to act on these homicidal thoughts. Now, Dr. Fenton was wondering that maybe James was closed off because she was a woman. Maybe if a male doctor was there, he would feel more comfortable. She also wanted a second opinion on how to move forward with James. So she suggests an idea. She wanted to know how James would feel about her superior coming into their sessions. Dr. Robert Feinstein. Now she had worked with him a lot, and he specialized with individuals who had violent tendencies. She thought that he would add some helpful information. But at first, James didn't like the idea. He was suspicious. And he said this. Oh, it'll be to lock me up. But Dr. Fenton

reassured him. No, no, no, it's just to get some more information for your treatment. And with that, James agreed. But in that moment, he made an observation of Dr. Fenton, saying this. things like crinkle your nose, which means dislike. You have an unconscious and that makes you do things. Now soon after this, their session would come to an end. And Dr. Fenton hoped that in their next meeting, they could get a little further. But soon after leaving her office, James started spiraling. He came to the realization that school wasn't working out for him. That week, he had even messaged one of his professors expressing his desire to join his lab. But the The professor writes back letting him know that he has some concerns and that he isn't sure James is the right fit.

Following that, James would message his father about how he had been struggling in his classes. His dad responds that the job market is rough right now and that he should stay in school. James then changes the subject and tells his dad that he has a new lady friend. He says they went on a hike and had a good time. But I think it's here where James realizes, that he's lost all purpose in life. He lost his girlfriend, and he's flunking his classes. So sadly, he comes up with another purpose for his life.

He's going to kill people. And on May 10th, he purchases the first of his supplies. It's a tear gas canister and a gas mask. Now, James didn't have all the details of his plan mapped out just yet, but he would start brainstorming in his notebook. First, he thinks about using a bomb. However, he decides against it. Too regulated. People would be suspicious of me.

Next, he considers biological warfare. But that's not a good idea either. I'm not smart enough for all that. I'd have to buy chemicals that are traceable. So what about being a serial killer? James wrote in his notebook that he could go to national parks and pretend he was on a walk. He wrote about using a stun gun that looks,

like a cell phone. And when he was walking through the parks, he would pretend to be using that cell phone when he walked by a victim. Then when they weren't looking, he would use the stun gun to take them down, pull out a folding knife, and then stab them to death. Later on, James would even purchase a cell phone stun gun and a folding knife. However, he decided that this plan wouldn't work out either, writing the following. Too personal, leaves behind too much evidence. and I'd only get to kill one person at a time. James wanted more than that. So that's when he came up with the idea of a mass shooting.

He even weighed the pros and cons of it. I'm not used to using guns. They are primitive in nature. But that would be the way to kill as many people as possible. Another con is you have about a 99% chance of getting caught. But to James, this was his best option. He was going to commit a mass shooting. The next question was where?

But before he could work out those details, he had another therapy session with Dr. Fenton, and this time, Dr. Feinstein would be joining them as well. Now, before the session, the doctors met up to discuss their plan, and they decided that Dr. Feinstein would be the one to conduct the interview, and Dr. Fenton would just observe. So on May 31st, James walked into her office, and Dr. Feinstein started the session.

James told him that he had recently gone through a breakup, and that after the breakup, he told his girlfriend that he hates people. James also told Dr. Feinstein that he hates sheeple, sheep people. Now, from there, they talked a little bit about James' family, and then the conversation shifted to school. James said he had some big exams coming up, but he wasn't studying for them. When asked why, James said the following.

I'm prepared enough. I know what I'm doing. I've done this before. I'll be fine. Dr. Feinstein asks, So if you're not studying, what have you been doing? Of course, James didn't tell him that he had been planning a mass shooting. So instead, he says this. I've been playing this game called Diablo. I've also been reading about the Tylenol terrorist attack.

Dr. Feinstein asks, Have you been having any more homicidal thoughts? Yes. Do you have plans? to act on those thoughts? No. Do you think about killing anyone in particular? No.

Are you depressed or suicidal? No. So from here, Dr. Feinstein suggests what Dr. Fenton did a few sessions back. He asks James if he would be open to taking that antipsychotic. But James says no. He didn't want to take it. And soon after that, the session ends. They don't make any more adjustments to his medication.

but they do schedule their next session that Dr. Feinstein wanted to be a part of. Again, neither of them believed that James was a danger to himself or others, but they couldn't have been more wrong. In his journals, he even called Dr. Fenton a mind rapist and a pill popper. He thought that she wasn't actually trying to help him. She was just drowning his problems with different pills that he said weren't working. and unbeknownst to the doctors, he had already been planning his attack. He had been purchasing supplies for the attack.

And the next thing he needed to figure out is where the mass shooting would take place. According to his notebook, he first considered an airport, but decided against it. Too much security. I don't want my peers to think of me as a terrorist. I'm not trying to send a message of any kind. This is just the way my brain has been for the last 15 years. And that's when he thinks about doing it at a movie theater, specifically the Century 16 theater near his apartment.

In his notebook, James writes the following. Theater, isolated, lots of people inside, about four miles away from my apartment. James had been to this theater a number of times, but that week he went back. Not because he really wanted to see a movie, but because he wanted to scope the place out, to see what he was working with. While there, he noticed that the theaters had these double doors, so he decided that he would buy some handcuffs so he could lock them together. A locked door meant more casualties,

and James wanted to kill as many people as he could. But that also meant that he would have to do it during a movie where a lot of people would show up. So after looking at the movies that were releasing that summer, James decided to do it during the midnight showing of the Batman movie, The Dark Night Rises. Later that night, he wrote this in his journal. Can't tell the mind rapists my plan.

If plan is disclosed, both normal life and ideal enactment on hatred foiled. Prevent building false sense of rapport. Speak truthfully and deflect incriminating questions. Oddly, they don't pursue or delve into harmful omissions. I was fear incarnate. Love gone, motivation directed to hate and obsessions. embraced the hatred. A dark night rises. In his notebook, he also writes about how he's finally going to give end to his hatred of

mankind. He's finally going to do something about it. But he notes that first, he needs to do some research. Look up firearm laws and mental illness. Buy body armor. Learn how to shoot guns. He also decides that on top of committing a mass shooting, he wanted to booby-trap his apartment. So he started buying explosives and more weapons. He bought a Glock Model 22 and a 40 caliber handgun at a local sporting goods store. Then he bought a Remington 870 12-gauge shotgun and close to 7,000 rounds of ammunition. And he didn't try to hide these purchases. He used his real name, credit card, and email for all of it.

He also continued writing in his journal. The weak are most likely to perish in trying times. Likewise, the strong are most likely to overcome. Why do the average and strong support the weak? This is easily answered. In trying times, the weak will fall. They act as a buffer. Furthermore, when the weak die, the average and strong become weaker.

As James' arsenal of weapons started growing, he began taking the guns apart in his apartment. He wanted to get familiar with everything. He also started researching other mass shootings. He wanted to look at those to see what the police response times were and how much ammo he needed. He even calculated how far the Aurora Police Department was to the Century 16 Theater.

He calculated that they would probably get there in about three minutes, something he would have to consider. He also said that around this time, his homicidal ideations were getting worse. During his lab rotations, James claimed to have seen flickering, blobs, and head juggling shadows. Now, some people believe this, others don't. But one thing that we do know is that James' desire to kill was getting stronger, while his motivation to do well in school was worse than ever.

On June 7th, James failed one of his oral exams. He had never been good at those. Public speaking made him nervous. And in the weeks before the exams, he had been too focused on planning a mass shooting and he wasn't prepared, so he failed. Following the exam, he messaged that girl he had been talking to. He told her he had flunked it. Then, later that day, he went to a nearby town to purchase a rifle. Two days later, his professor messaged him letting him know that he was going to have to retake his exams.

But James responded with this. Dear sirs, I regret to inform you that I will be discontinuing my graduate studies in the neuroscience program effective immediately. Regards James Holmes. His professor would later respond that that was probably in his best interest as he clearly hadn't been making that much of an effort. James would later say that he was upset that no one tried to talk him out of quitting, but in reality he had already made up his mind by this point.

He was done with school and all of his focus was now towards the massacre, but he would still attend his final therapy session on June 11, 2012. Before the session, both Dr. Fenton and Dr. Feinstein were there. And this time, they would both be asking him questions. How did your exams go? Dr. Fenton asks. I failed. Dr. Fenton says she's sorry he didn't do well. But some students can retake them if they talk to their professor.

I'm not going to retake them. I'll probably just drop out of the neuroscience program. Now, most students in his position would be freaking out. But strangely, James didn't seem to care. Dr. Fenton even wrote down in her notes that he was, quote, inappropriately nonchalant, end quote. In fact, he almost looked relaxed, like dropping out gave him some relief. Now, they started asking him about his plans once he dropped out.

I have about $10,000 in savings that I could live off of, and I plan on getting a job. Well, are you going back home to California? They ask him? No, my lease here doesn't end until November, so I'll probably find a job here. Fenton and Feinstein figured that given his situation, he had appropriate goals for his future, nothing that screamed he was going to end his life or the life of others. So next, they asked if he told anyone he had dropped out. No, but I plan on telling my parents. I don't think they'd be surprised.

I've kind of been giving them hints that I haven't been doing well. Dr. Fenton and Dr. Feinstein try to convince him to keep coming back to therapy. But James said that since he's not a student anymore, it won't be covered by insurance. However, they tell him to keep coming back anyway and they'll figure it out. But next, James does something really strange. About 20 minutes into their 50-minute session, he randomly stands up, turns on his heels, and walks out. No handshake, no goodbye, or anything. But he never indicated he was planning to harm anyone.

So again, they said they couldn't put him under any psychiatric hold. Here is Dr. Fenton explaining this. A mental health hold and somebody who has homicidal thoughts, to qualify for a mental health hold, they need to have a couple of things. And one is evidence that it's not just a thought, but they have a plan. They're moving towards action on those thoughts. And then the second thing is there has to be a specific target.

And he all along had denied both of those. In her notes, Dr. Fenton wrote her concerns about James. They read, One, his longstanding fantasies of killing as many people as possible. Two, is caginess in discussing any details regarding methods, targets, and timing. 3. His refusal to give us permission to contact anyone who could give us collateral info or speak on his behalf. 4. The unclear timeline of his mental health status in past history. Has he always been this odd and angry? Or is this new? Suggesting a psychotic break,

substance-related psychosis or medical illness? In later interviews, James told professionals, I don't think I made it clear enough that I was mentally ill. I'd already started getting weapons. and then I started thinking they were going to be frightened of me because I had weapons. Dr. Reed supposes in a dark night in Aurora. A part of him believed and a part of him hoped that they somehow knew his thoughts and his plans without his revealing them. But Dr. Fenton was so uneasy about the situation.

She decided to break her pledge of Dr. Patient Confidentiality and she called James' mother. When Arlene answered the phone, Dr. Fenton said that James had been seeing her for his anxiety But then she said, Did you know he quit school? Arlene said she suspected it because the last time they spoke, James said he was struggling. But Arlene claimed that she was never informed that James was having homicidal ideations.

She and Dr. Fenton also talked about James continuing treatment even though he wasn't a student anymore. And Arlene offered to continue paying for the therapy sessions. However, James would never come back. But even after speaking, Speaking to James' mother, Dr. Fenton said she was still worried. No. What did you do?

So I still had significant concerns about his homicidal thoughts and potential dangerousness. So I took some additional steps. Tell us about him. So the first thing I did, other than discussing this with Dr. Feinstein at the end of the session, was I called what's known as our beta team. The beta team is in charge of helping students that have potentially dangerous behavior. After receiving a report, they will then conduct a background check on the individual to see if they have some sort of criminal record. They also check to see if they have been in the military to look at possible PTSD, and then they will go from there. So Dr. Fenton said she called them to figure out what she should do next.

Here is this potentially violent man who just dropped out of school, what she would be. do with him. Now, in the beta's report, they said, quote, Lynn Fenton described James Holmes as having homicidal thoughts and also stated that he had threatened and harassed her via email text message, end quote. However, despite this information, they decided not to take action because James was no longer a student there. Dr. Fenton also contacted the campus police department, and believe it or not, they offered to put James on a 72-hour hold, but Dr. Fenton declined it. She didn't think he met the criteria for the hold. So after she reported it to beta, that was it. No one would ever go to check up on James Holmes.

If they had, they may have seen the arsenal of weapons in his apartment. They may have seen his journal entries, where he was meticulously planning an attack, and they may have intercepted his plan, but they didn't. And now that he's a lot of the he had fully dropped out of school, James could now dedicate all of his time to preparing for the massacre that was just on the horizon. If you love murder in America, you love mysteries, you love true crime, you love murder stories, and the unknown, that I have a new show for you. It's called The Conspiracy Files, and it's hosted by me, Colin Browne from Murder in America and the Paranormal Files.

On the Conspiracy Files, we explore everything from bizarre deaths to freak, paranormal events, pedophile rings, government corruption, rituals sacrifice. No topic is untouched on this show. Everything that we talk about on the conspiracy files is backed up with fact. I release reference sheets with every single episode that we do so you guys know. Everything we're talking about is confirmed to have happened and be real. It's a completely different type of show than anything else you've ever seen about conspiracy theories instead of a bunch of conjecture and theories we're presenting you people with facts, telling you the story, walking you through the story just as detailed as we do with murder in

America, and then letting the listener decide what they think. Anyways, you should definitely give it a listen. It's called The Conspiracy Files. The links are in the description of this show, and you can find it on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. And now let's get back to our story. Just two days after his final therapy session, James buys hundreds of rounds of ammunition, a laser site, hearing protection, and magazines for his weapons.

Then a few days after that, he officially returned his student badge. It's also around this time when he and his parents send some emails back and forth. After his mom got the call from Dr. Fenton about him leaving school, they message James and let him know that he's welcome to come back home to San Diego. But he tells them that he didn't want to come home yet. So his dad suggests that he apply for unemployment. And he does. He messages his dad that week, telling him that he applied and he's ready to become a lazy bum.

His emails seem pretty normal. And given this big life change he was going through, he seemed to be in good spirits. In one email, his parents talk about a trip they're taking to Mexico. And James responds. Austa Le Vista, baby. Now, in the month of June is where James really started planning and getting everything ready. He visited the Century 16 Theater a number of times to study the building, and he wrote out a pros and cons list. Pro, you can lock the double doors with handcuffs, trapping the victims increasing casualties.

Cons, with the exit doors, there might be too many escapees. Over time, James began going into each of the theaters inside Century 16 to see which one would be best to attack. In his notes, he wrote that Theater 12 was a good one, only two exits. He gave Theater 10, three stars, writing, Only two exits, excellent spatial approach. But other theaters weren't as good. In his notes, he wrote that Theater 8 had four exits, two that were visible. Avoid that one, he wrote.

And finally, after looking through all of them, James decided that he would either do Theater 9 or Theater 10. Both sat hundreds of people and they both had just two exits. During the attack, James planned on throwing tear gas near those exits so that people wouldn't be able to see where to run. But strangely enough, James also planned on escaping after the massacre. He even purchased tire-puncturing devices to use on police cars so he could get away. He bought a ton of body armor so that he wouldn't get shot in the attack. And just in case he did, he also purchased a first aid kit for himself. He truly thought that he could shoot up this theater and then escape. Over the course of the next few weeks, James took several pictures both inside and outside of

the Century 16 theater. He buys more ammunition. He also finds out that his unemployment had been denied, but he was doing okay on money. On June 29th, he even walks into his apartment's leasing office and hands in his rent check. A few days after that, he dyes his hair that infamous orange color. Now, later on, many people believed that he did this to represent the Joker in the Batman movies, that he was this evil force. But James himself would later admit that this wasn't true. In fact, he only chose the Batman movie because he knew a lot of people would be at that showing. There was no hidden meaning behind it. In his journals, he wrote, Most fools will mistake correlation for causation.

The message is there is no message. The causation is my state of mind for the last 15 years. He would also say, I didn't really have a reason for dyeing my hair. I did it to stand out. I guess to be like exotic, I guess. I dyed it red because I thought it would look better than green or blue. On July 1st, he went out and bought a rifle and more ammunition.

He also drove to a shooting range about two and a half hours away from Aurora. He ended up going to this range five different times before the shooting. To practice, he bought specialty earmuffs, and he spent hours shooting at life-size silhouettes. Witnesses reported that while shooting at the targets, he would move side to side, sometimes even crouching down. He was perfecting his form. That week, he also bought these black contacts that he wanted to wear during the shooting.

ones that made your eyes look completely black. He would later say that he bought them because he thought it would make him look cool. Now, another huge part of James' plan was booby-trapping his apartment, and it's around this time when he started buying more supplies for that, including a remote control vehicle, a boombox, batteries, and chemicals. But interestingly, he also signs himself up for a bunch of dating websites, with one being called hornymatches.com. That week, he uploaded pictures of himself with his new orange hair with captions that read,

Will you visit me in prison? He would later say, It's unusual to have dyed hair like that and contact lenses like that. It's more likely I'd be remembered something unusual than something mundane. Now, that week, he also texted that girl from his classes. She asked if he was still in Aurora or if he had moved back home, and James said that he was still in town, but he warned her. Look, you should avoid me.

I'm bad news bears. On July 17th, James buys a movie ticket for The Dark Night Rises on July 20th, 2012. And he actually buys three of them, because every time he purchased the ticket, it put him in Theater 8. Now, Theater 8 was one of the theaters that he wanted to avoid due to the amount of exits. So he tries to buy another ticket to Theater 9 and another and another, but every time he does, it just gives him a ticket to Theater 8. So that's when he decided, screw the ticket,

I'll just pretend I'm walking into Theater 8, and instead I'll slip into Theater 9. Earlier that week, he also bought an iPod so he could play music during the attack. He also bought window tent for his car and air fresheners to mask the smell of gasoline in his apartment. In the days before the shooting,

James laid out all of his weapons on his business. bed. He tried on all of his tactical gear. He would later say, quote, I tested it first, just wearing it with all the magazines and their places and the gun slings on and off. End quote. He said while wearing everything, he looked at himself in the mirror. He even snapped a picture of him holding up a gun. He would later say that he wanted to look dangerous during the shooting. Like if people saw him, they would be afraid. He said that that was important. because of all the people that were going to be in the theater, he said, quote, You don't want 400 people rushing you. It's quite easy. They could have overwhelmed me.

Which brings us to July 19th, 2012. As the evening approached, the midnight showing of the dark night rises was just hours away. And James was finishing up the last minute details of his plan. That night, he got out at least $400 in cash, and he spent some time burning. each of the bills. He then put them in an envelope, along with his journal, which he had been using to plan the attack. Then he made his way to the post office. You see, James was going to send this package to his therapist, Dr. Fenton. He knew it wouldn't get to her until after the attack, but he clearly wanted to send her a message. Now, people have debated back and forth between what the burn dollar bills represented. Some people believe that it was because James had lost his

student insurance and could no longer use her services because he wasn't a student anymore. And then, of course, he sent his journal likely to taunt Dr. Fenton. To show her that the entire time they had been seeing each other, this is what he had been planning. So after sending out the package, James finished booby-trapping his apartment. He had set up a trip wire right in his front door. Over to the side was a thermos filled with glycerin. According to James' plan, when authorities would come into his apartment, they would trip over

the wire, and that thermos were. would pour the glycerin into this pan that was laying there. The pan was coated with potassium permanganate, and when those two mixed, it's supposed to create a flash fire. He also covered the floor with gasoline and oil, so when that flash fire ignited, it would start a massive fiery blaze. He also sprinkled magnesium on the floor. And the reason he did that is because magnesium fires get worse when water is put on them. So when the firefighters would come and try to put the fire out, it would burn even harder. James also considered the possibility

that no one would walk right through the tripwire. So it's here where he came up with another plan by making a launch control box. That evening, James walked outside of his apartment complex holding a remote control car and a boom box. And from there, he walks over to his apartment's dumpster and sets them down on the ground. Now he rigged the boombox so that in exactly 40 minutes,

loud music would start playing from it. He hoped that someone would follow the sound of the music, and when they did, they would see the remote control car sitting by the trash can. In James's mind, if someone saw that remote control car sitting there, they would have to pick it up and play with it. Except the remote did not control the car. It was actually connected to his booby-trapped apartment. So if someone did find it and they pushed a button on the remote,

the apartment would engulf in flames. Now after setting this by the dumpster, James gets ready for the night. He packs up his gear, weapons, ammunition, and his body protection. He also takes a Vicodin, which is a pain medication. He would later say that he did this

because he didn't want to get hurt if he got shot. But before leaving, he blare some music in his apartment. He was hoping that if someone would hear it, they would walk into his unit, right into the tripwire. But from there, shortly before midnight, he leaves his home and makes his way to the Century 16 theater. Now, soon after James left his apartment, one of his neighbors actually heard the music blaring from his unit, and she went over to confront him. It was almost midnight, and their apartment had quiet hours, so no one was supposed to be playing music this loud.

So she walks over and bangs on the door. However, no one answers. Now, this girl said she actually grabbed the doorknob and noticed that it was unlocked. She was about to open it and tell the person inside to turn the music down. But something inside of her told her not to do it. Instead, she went downstairs, told her boyfriend about what she saw, and together they called the police. But nothing happened.

By the time the police realized what was going on, it would be too late. Upon arriving to the theater, James parked his white sedan in the back. Now, me and Colin actually visited this theater earlier this year, and the back parking lot is completely isolated. Even when we went, there were no cars, no security guards, or anything. So on that night, as James drove to the back, no one was suspecting a thing. James parked his vehicle right outside of Theater 9's exit. Then after parking, he walked around to the main entrance and showed the workers his ticket. Now remember, he bought a ticket for Theater 8, but he planned on just walking into Theater 9 and finding an open seat.

But before he did, he hung out around the concessions for a while. He likely saw people getting popcorn and drinks for the movie he was about to shoot up. Many people walked to the theater with smiles on their faces, wearing their Batman t-shirts, so excited for the night ahead. James was also excited, but for a different reason. Shortly after midnight, he walks into Theater 9. There were hundreds of people already in their seats watching the previews. James takes a seat near the front. But after a few minutes, he pulls out his phone and pretends to take a call.

He puts the phone up to his ear, stands up, and then walks out of the theater's exit door by the screen. Now, these doors are made so that you can leave in an emergency, but once they close, you can't get back in from the outside. However, James had already prepared for this. He pulled out these clips that he attached to the door to keep it propped open. Then from there, he made his way to his car to put his gear on. While in the car, James quickly put on a bulletproof vest, a ballistic helmet, bullet-resistant leggings, a throat protector, a groin protector, and tactical gloves. He also put on a gas mask. But while he was putting everything on, he actually heard something right outside his door.

When he looked out, he saw a worker throwing something in the dumpster. Now, James had put a tent on his windows before the shooting, but you could still see the inside of his vehicle. It would later say that he thought his plan was about to be ruined, and he was fully prepared to shoot the worker if they walked over to him. But they never did. They walked back inside the theater without ever noticing him. Once James was fully dressed, he grabbed his weapons and supplies.

His plan was to walk in the theater and throw two cans of tea. gas, one for each exit. Then he would begin shooting, using a number of guns he had with him. But first, James decided to make a phone call. He pulled out his phone and called the university's mental health crisis hotline. Now exactly what happened with this call is still a little unclear. The prosecution would later say that James hung up as soon as someone answered. A worker claimed that she tried to talk to the caller, but only heard silence. James said that no one ever picked up. Now there are some people who believe this was a cry for help. However, there are others who think that James planned this entire thing out, wanting to claim

insanity, and calling the university hotline would help his case. But we will get into that more in next week's episode. After calling the hotline, James grabbed his headphones and he began blaring loud techno music. He would later admit that he didn't want to hear the sound of the attack, so he turned up the volume as high as it could go. As he stepped out of the car, holding his guns and tear gas, he accidentally dropped one of the tear gas canisters. He looked around for it on the ground, but he couldn't find it. It had rolled underneath his car, but that didn't matter. He didn't need it. And from there, he took a deep breath and he opened the door to Theater 9. The flickering light from the screen illuminated the audience of 400,000.

innocent people. James could see their faces. To him, they were numbers, lives he needed to take to improve his own. He then tightened his finger around the trigger of his shotgun. He recalled thinking to himself, quote, I'm really going to do this. But what would happen next would haunt our country to its core, because up until this point, movie theaters were safe, and within an instant that would all change. Join us next week as we walk you through everything that happened on that horrific night. For today's episode, we will be making a donation to Sandy Hook Promise. And Courtney and I both encourage all of you listeners out there to make a donation of your own as well.

Hey, everybody, thank you so much for listening to this week's episode of Murder in America. So Courtney and I have been wanting to tell this story for a long time. It is such a detailed story with so many things that were made. missed and it's just infuriating and I don't know it really is frustrating telling these stories time and time again and researching these stories and having our team write these cases up and help guide us through them and you realize that each one of these cases is almost a carbon copy of the one before and the one after people always miss the warning signs nothing changes in our country and it's just so sad you feel like you can see these events coming from a mile away

but the common theme that you hear from everybody usually involved in these things is that nobody really saw it coming. So yeah, thank you for joining us this week. If you guys want to support our show, please consider joining us on Patreon. If you don't like the ads and you want to get early access to each episode of the show, you can get that on Patreon. You can also get access to bonus episodes of Murder in America that will never go live on our main feed. If you've never signed up before and you sign up today, there are over 100 bonus episodes of the show, full-length episodes featuring Courtney and I, music, sound effects, the whole thing. They are exactly like the episodes you hear here on our main feed,

but just exclusively for patrons who helped make this show what it is. So yeah, Courtney and I can't thank you guys enough for helping us build the show to where it's at and for everything you guys have done for us over the years. We hope that we're doing right by y'all. Also, follow us on Instagram at Murder in America to see photos from every case that we cover here on the show. And please leave us a five-star review wherever you listen to this podcast. Anyways, guys, we will be back next week with part two of this sad but true story. I'm Colin.

Thank you all for tuning in, and I'll catch y'all on the next one.