Murder With My Husband - 27. Rebecca Sedwick - Bullying Taken Too Far

Episode Date: September 14, 2020

In this episode of Murder With My Husband, Payton tells Garrett the different true crime story of Rebecca Sedwick. When is bullying taken too far? LIVE ONLINE SHOW TICKETS HERE! https://www.moment.co/murderwithmyhusband Case Sources: http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/content/cyber-bullying-statistics.html https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/theledger/obituary.aspx?n=rebecca-ann-sedwick-becca&pid=166939688&fhid=3990 https://www.cnn.com/2014/04/18/living/rebecca-sedwick-bullying-suicide-follow-parents/index.html https://www.wlrn.org/education/2013-10-15/the-rise-of-cyberbullying-the-case-of-rebecca-sedwick https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/10/15/florida-bullying-arrest-lakeland-suicide/2986079/ https://www.nytimes.com/2013/09/14/us/suicide-of-girl-after-bullying-raises-worries-on-web-sites.html https://www.cbsnews.com/news/rebecca-sedwick-case-bullied-girl-and-her-tormentor-both-grew-up-in-disturbing-family-situations-says-sheriff/ Check out our Social Media: https://linktr.ee/murderwithmyhusband  Case Suggestion: Juliette on Instagram  Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This summer, PXU Energy is back with Ultimate Summer Pat, starting 50% off energy charges all summer. Everybody's on for automatic energy savings! Plus free energy on the hottest day. Don't you see it? Free days are now the coolest days. In this summer's hottest blood flow start guaranteeing to keep you cool. The savings for coming from inside the house! Ultimate Summer Pat, energy has been developed so cool.

Yes, you energy. Energy for everything. Captain Banner now to our podcast. This is Murder with My Husband. I'm Peyton Moreland. And I'm Garrett Moreland. And he's the husband. And I'm the husband.

We hope everyone's had a good week this week. We got so many new followers on our social media So hello everyone if you're new if you're a continued listener We also had so many people share this week. So thank you so much everyone who shared it. It's amazing It's been super fun. It really has been yeah We also got sent something in our PO box. It was a customized vinyl decal We want to put it on the back of our car. It said Murder with my husband podcast. She loves it and he hates it. It was so cute as it was from at Haley Conrad designs on Instagram

So thank you Haley so much. It was seriously so fun to get that in the mail. I was freaking out Okay, should we just jump right into the story? Yeah, let's do it. Our case sources today are bowlingstatistics.org legacy.com, cnn.com, wlren.org, USAToday.com, New York Times.com, and CBS News.com. Cyberbowling is a new form of bullying that we see only getting bigger every single year. I definitely saw cyberbullying during my time in high school. There was actually this thing when I was in middle school called Ask.fm. And, basically, did you have that? No, I've never heard of that.

It's like this thing where you have a profile and anyone can anonymously post a question or comment on your page and vice versa, like you could do it to someone else and you get to choose to reply or not, but it's all anonymous. So I never had one like I said, but I remember reading people's and wondering why they would ever put themselves out there to get like bashed on like that because people would just bully each other because it was all anonymous. Was a lot of it though because people wanted to be able to tell people like, Oh, you're hot or something like that? No, not really. Like I didn't, at least from my school it wasn't like that.

It was like, um, why'd you hook up with this girl's boyfriend? We all know you did it. Oh, okay. Stuff like that. Yeah, just drama. Yeah, just drama. It was all just people attacking people. I never got one because I was like, I don't want to do that. Yeah, just drama. It was all just people attacking people. I never got one

because I was like, I don't want to do that. Here are some actually statistics about cyber bullying that I found on bullying statistics.org. Over half of adolescence and teens have been bullied online and about the same number have engaged in cyber bullying. More than one in three young people have experienced cyber threats online. Over 25% of adolescents and teens have been bullied repeatedly through their cell phones or the internet. Well over half of young people do not tell their parents when cyberbullying occurs. Over 80% of teens use a cell phone regularly making it the most popular form of technology and a common medium for cyberbullying.

About half of young people have experienced some form of cyberbullying and 10 to 20% experience it regularly. Wow, that's a lot. So our story takes place between 2012 and 2013, just kind of like, I think it's December 2012 to February 2013. Okay. And this is the story of Rebecca Sedwick. Rebecca and Sedwick, I think she went by Becca, but all of the sources referred to as

Rebecca, so I'll call her Rebecca, was born October 19th, 2000 in Sibring, Florida. 2000, that's so weird to hear. I know, right? 2000 doesn't even seem that long ago, but it was like 20 years ago as long. Yeah. Her family and her eventually moved to Lakeland, Florida. When Rebecca turned 12 years old and was finally at that awkward middle school phase, things became extremely hard for her. Rebecca broke up with a boy and that is ultimately when the trouble at school began. Rebecca began getting bullied. The sources aren't clear but apparently a girl went on a date with one of Rebecca's

ex-boyfriends, that boy she'd broke up with, and then the girl who went on day with him started attacking her online and in person. What social media platforms were they using to? Instagram Facebook because this is 2012. Oh, okay, sir. I got confused because you said born in 2000. Oh, yeah. Okay. So 2012. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So she's in middle school. And yeah, it's 2012. Yeah. That makes sense. So after this, you know, the boy, she breaks up with him and all the bullying begins Rebecca actually starts cutting her wrists in December and when her mother noticed, she sent Rebecca to be hospitalized for three days.

So she was like, something's going on. So she got admitted into a hospital for three days that came along with counseling and everything. She gets out of the hospital and is sent back to school where the bullying got worse. Oh man. Rebecca's mother complained to the school at this point about the bullying but nothing was really done. I think they tried to like separate the girls schedules or whatever but we all know that doesn't really stop anyone from talking or being rude. And so when nothing got fixed at school, Rebecca's mom just pulled her out of school and

homeschooled her for the rest of the year. She also took her phone and deleted all of her social media apps because a lot of it was happening online as well. As the year rounded up, Rebecca actually started to get better, like her mom noticed that she wasn't as sad all the time and didn't look like she had been harming herself. So for the new school year, Rebecca decided to move to a brand new school, get a brand new star, and things really did seem to be getting better. She was like, gonna try out for the cheer team, the choir, she had a whole bunch of plans. But, oh, go ahead. I don't know enough about, I guess, the whole logistics or legality behind all the cyberbullying stuff, but you would think if... You knew your kid was cyberbullying someone, but you would think if you knew your kid was cyberbullying

someone, you would tell them to stop. You would think that if you knew your kid was cyberbullying or if the school knew there was cyberbullying, they would try to put a stop to it, and maybe they do. But I don't know, it just kind of sucks that it kept going on. Yeah, so I mean, this is a little bit younger, this is middle school.

So I do think they would be contacting parents. But I think in high school, at least from my experiences there, I don't think they contacted parents for bullying issues. They just pulled the two people in. If you wanted to get your own parent involved, you could. But they didn't call parents and be like, oh, this is happening. Even if a parent called on another kid, like her mom did, they would just pull the kid in and say,

stop doing this. I don't think they would call his parents, but maybe his or her parents, but maybe they should. Because I feel like cyber bowling now, I mean, it's the new wave of bowling. It's not. I don't know how to say it, but it's a big issue. And it's worse, because you get a hide behind the screen.

There's, and there's so many social media I have to say that to someone's face, you know, but yeah, no, it's it's that's sad Yeah, I get nervous like I I mean I was on I had social media in high school But it was still fairly new not every single person I knew had a smartphone and so it scares me thinking of Raising my own kids or the kids nowadays how hard that is to grow up in the atmosphere where everyone is on social media. About the parent thing, I mean, it also is pretty common for parents to think that their own kids do no wrong. Like you, I mean,

we see it in some of the murder cases, a parents just can't comprehend the fact that their kid would do it. So I think that can also be an on a smaller scale related to bullying. Like parents just can't comprehend the fact that their kid would do it. So I think that can also be on a smaller scale related to bullying. Like they just can't comprehend the fact that their kid would even say that online or even had an Instagram account. You know what I'm saying? So when she gets sent, so we're back. Rebecca gets sent to her new school. They, her parents decided to give her her phone back. I think they made a rule though. You still have to delete Instagram and Facebook. Like, you can't have that, but you can have your phone back. So Rebecca gets her phone back. Keep in mind, she's a 12, 13 year old teenager. She downloads other apps such as Kick, Ask.fm, Voxer, WhatsApp, all these other things that you

can message people on that you can create a profile on. I've never really used those I mean I use what's up now for some work stuff Mm-hmm. I never used those growing up. Yeah, I mean I didn't you I've never used any of those But I've definitely heard of them. I mean I didn't know anyone who like actively used to them But also she's a lot younger than I was So I don't know how this was for their age. And I think this part does go to show that there are so many apps out there that parents don't know that kids have and that they use. I mean, this is the first generation of kids we have who are growing up in this

weird technological, everything's online era. And parents are just trying to keep up. We're just trying to catch up, you know, like, oh, and so her mom was like, oh, I got rid of Instagram and I got rid of Facebook. Like now the threat is taking away. It's like, oh, there's once you take one down, there's another one right there standing in its place. Yeah, totally. So the bullying for Rebecca started up again via these new apps and keep in mind she

was out of new school at this point so everything is now cyber bullying. On September 9th, Rebecca's mom found her phone and schoolbooks hidden even though she was supposed to have left for school already that morning. After some time, Rebecca was found. She had climbed a tower at an abandoned concrete plant that morning and jumped to her death. When they went through Rebecca's phone, they found that she had actually changed her username on kick to, and I quote, that dead girl. She had sent a message to two different friends that morning saying goodbye forever. Oh my gosh.

Jumping into an ad and it is native. I use their body wash. I use their shampoo. We use their sunscreen, everything. They're deodorant. We are big native fans over here. And the funny thing is is I caught myself wanting to buy native products at stores. And then I was like, why am I doing that?

Murder with my husband literally has a code. You can use promo code husband and get money off your native purchases. So go do it. Native sunscreen offers a quickly absorbing ultra shear and lightweight formula that hydrates your skin while providing broad spectrum SPF 30 protection from harmful UVA and UVB rays.

And native sunscreen offers three delightful scents, coconut and pineapple, rosé, and sweet peach in nectar. They're also for your face and body, I use them every day. But if you prefer unscented, they've got you covered too. Give your skin the protection it deserves with natives and mineral sunscreens. Go to nativedo.com slash husband or use promo code husband at checkout to get 20% off your first order. That's native DEO dot com slash husband or use promo code husband at checkout. Native do dot com slash husband and use promo code husband. Okay,

you guys, we are getting into an ad. I know you guys have both heard the story about how Garrett and I were both paying separately for peacock. And then we used rocket money and realized how dumb we are and our so happy rocket money helped us stop doing that. Rocket money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place.

And like Payton said, I'm always on it, checking things out, seeing what's going on, seeing how many Amazon packages Payton are buying. Is that how you find out about my Amazon packages? No, I just get emails. Oh my email. Gosh. My email on the account. Over 3 million people have already used rocket money,

saving the average person of the $720 a year. Imagine what you could do with that extra cash and your pocket. Stop throwing your money away. Cancel on one of the subscriptions and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash husband going to rockupmoney.com slash husband. That's rockupmoney.com slash husband. Rockupmoney.com slash husband. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Have you ever found yourself at a crossroads unsure of which direction to take in life? We all face those moments of uncertainty where the right path seems elusive. But guess what? There's a solution that can help you find clarity and confidence.

And that's therapy. As you guys know, I talk about therapy all the time. I go to therapy weekly. I definitely am a big supporter of it. It's helped me manage my stress and anxiety and really helped me work through difficult times. Therapy is not just for major traumas. It's for anyone who wants to learn positive coping skills, set healthy boundaries, and become the best version of themselves.

It's about staying connected to what truly matters, as you navigate life's challenges. Here's how it works. Simply fill out a brief questionnaire and better help will match you with a licensed therapist who meets your specific needs. And if you ever feel they need to switch therapist, you can do so at no additional charge. That therapy be your map to a better life. Visit better help.com slash husband today and get 10% off your first month? That's better help help.com slash husband. Investigations showed that Rebecca was bullied far more than anyone had thought. There were

about 15 middle school girls who told Rebecca to kill herself consistently every single day. Were these bullies from her old school or her new school? Old school. Okay. Messages like, and these are verbatim. Go kill yourself. Why are you still alive? You seriously deserve to die. Nobody cares about you. Drink bleach and die, etc. I mean, the messages just went on all about you should kill yourself essentially. I mean, the messages just went on all about you should kill yourself essentially. I mean, there were messages that called her ugly and stupid and stuff like that,

but there were messages every day about that. I'm so confused why someone would tell someone else to go kill themselves. It's so drastic to me. I literally wrote that. My initial question is how could 15 girls actually say these things to someone else? Like I get one big bad bully,

but a group of 15 girls who are messaging this, like whatever. Oh, 15. But I think when everybody around you is doing it, like 15 girls were in on it, it maybe seems like it's not that big a deal. Like everyone was telling Rebecca to go kill herself. So for me to send the message,

it just desensitizes it for them. Oh, that's horrible. So now it happens. Did they all get tried or? So they search Rebecca's phone. They also found signs of serious depression. She had taken pictures with razor blades laying on her arms, her head resting on the edge of railroad tracks.

She had also searched one of the most heartbreaking things on Google. What is overweight for a 13 year old girl? They were calling her fat. And she also searched this. How much Advil do you have to overdose in order to die? That last one makes me sad because it doesn't even make sense. The term overdose is used in the wrong way, which further proves that she had no idea what she was even doing. She just, she didn't even know the enormity of what she was typing in. She used overdose in the completely wrong... Yeah, this one kind of breaks my heart. I'm keep mind she's in eighth grade at this point.

Only about a month after Rebecca had passed, two teenage girls, the two who kind of started the whole thing. One of the girls who went on the date with her ex-boyfriend that kind of started this whole bullying thing. One was 12 and one was 14 who I will not name because they're underage and they haven't been convicted were arrested and charged with aggravated stalking. convicted were arrested and charged with aggravated stalking. The arrest happened after the older 14 year old one posted on Facebook. Yes, I know I bullied Rebecca and she killed herself, but I don't give a... Oh my gosh. The 14 year old's mother later told cops that her Facebook was hacked and she didn't post that. No, she was sleeping when that was posted. It must have gotten hacked, but yeah, it's not true.

The 12 year old showed a little bit more remorse in her interview, but the 14 year old was stone cold. The 14 year old's mother was actually arrested on child abuse charges after a video surface of her punching two young boys. What the heck? So I think as young kids whose brains are still forming, they do what they see.

So she probably didn't feel remorse for bullying Rebecca because she was also being bullied as well. And yeah, and I don't know how much, I guess we can talk about them, right, because of just their underage. Well, their names are out in public. I'm choosing not to say their names. It's probably. Yeah.

So, that just seems like psychopathic behavior at such a young age to know you were probably the reason someone killed themselves, but to not give an F. Yeah. So, I mean, I'm not defending anyone's behavior here. I'm just simply stating that there is a lot of psychological stuff that goes in to the stories that we discuss on this podcast. And I do remember one time Garrett has little siblings and his little year little brother got called a name or something at a practice he was at. And we were like, you know, well, we don't know what he's going through at home. You know,

he could be going through some stuff at home. So let's remember that. So I'm not, no one should ever be bullied, not like people should be held accountable. This kind of stuff should not be happening. But the mother's behavior from this 14 year old is what makes me not surprised that she posted that on Facebook, which is what I'm trying to say that the psychological thing just goes down, you know, apparently the 14 year old had convinced the 12 year old to bully Rebecca and then it just spread like wildfire after that. The police decided to arrest the girls for fear of who they would target next. That's how not sorry the 14 year old was. The 14 year old's attorney was actually the same attorney that Casey Anthony had. and I know that means nothing to you

Yeah, I know yeah, but that means something crazy to our listeners He saw this case obviously was pretty high profile and he jumped right up for the job And we'll I'll tell you about Casey Anthony another time but for our listeners who do know who Casey Anthony is This is a big deal this case was pretty controversial because a lot of people disagreed on whether or not these girls should be charged for Rebecca's suicide. It only took another month, but then charges were dropped. There was not enough evidence to show

that these girls' actions and their actions alone were the sole cause of Rebecca's suicide. Okay, so nothing happened to them. According to, which is why I'm not naming them. Yeah. According to CNN, when we take a look inside Rebekah's file, we find that more than a year before her death, Rebekah had been suffering from depression due to her relationship with her father and her mother. In November of 2012, she accused her mother of abusing her but then took it back. The mother

said she didn't abuse her but she had slapped her once in the face when they were arguing. According to CBS News, problems at home could have been weighing on Rebecca's psyche. Apparently, Rebecca slept on a recliner at home, not a bed. And her and her sisters closed were kept in grocery sacks in the living room. So is all this true or do we not know? I mean, I think it, I mean, that the source set is true. They said they got this out of the police file.

Oh, okay. Her end that the, it was the sheriff who said that that she slept in a recliner and all of this. Mm hmm. Her mother's attorney says that she was just doing her best and her mother says that no other factors contributed to Rebecca's suicide other than the bullying from the girls. As the story unfolded, many other students came forward claiming that they had seen what their own eyes the bullying of Rebecca at school.

Oh my gosh. So who is to blame? The school for turning a blind eye when this was obviously a pretty big problem? The family life, the bullying from these girls? I don't think we can say. What I do know is that we need to look at this story and love those around us. You never know what somebody is battling on the inside. Parents, get involved in your kids life, care enough to know, and it's not just Facebook and Instagram. Learn about the new apps, talk to your kids, love them. Kids, if you are listening, just know, me and

Garrett love you. And believe me when I say, I know what's going on in your life seems enormous and like it'll never end. But as soon as you can see that there's more out there, there's opportunity waiting for you. And all of it doesn't matter as much as you think it does, I swear it'll get easier. Be kind and be friends to those who don't have any. Nancy Willard, director of Embrace Civilty in the digital age, says that Rebecca was fighting with herself over whether to commit suicide. Willard hopes that Rebecca's case raises awareness not just on how bullying is never the whole cause

of suicide, but that the whole theory that bullying causes suicide can end up actually endangering children who are suffering. For instance, she points to a case in Illinois where a student who was bullied killed himself a day after watching a movie in school about bullying. There's absolutely zero evidence that that's going to stop kids from bullying, but there's major concern that it's going to give kids who are being bullied, the idea that that's something they should consider. If you or someone you know is struggling, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255, and that's the story of Rebecca Sedwick.

Yeah, that's a hard one, because it wasn't obviously as true crime as there are other ones, but I mean, it's still super important, right? Yeah, I mean, I think it's important that we have the conversation. And kind of what Nancy was saying at the end is like, suicide can't be a trend. Mm-hmm. We can't, you know, we have to talk about it

with our kids, we have to talk about their feelings. If we address it now and don't give it a stigma before they can learn that it's stigmatized, we can then have the open conversations about it. Yeah. I think it's important that we do have these conversations and that we do address Rebecca's story and talk about how words really can hurt

and words really can kill. And I don't know who's to blame. I don't know whether this case did the right thing or the wrong thing and prosecuting or not prosecuting. I don't know. I just think it's important to open and have this conversation. Yeah. So I'll be posting all of the images for this story on social media.

So go ahead and follow us at murder with my husband on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. And I love it. And I hate it. Goodbye. When you download the Croger app, you have easy access to savings every day. Shop weekly sales and get personalized coupons to get the most value out of every trip every time, whether you shop in-store or online. Download the Croger app now to save big. Croger, fresh for everyone, must have a digital account to redeem offers.

Restrictions may apply, see site for details. Save big on your favorites with the Buy, Fiver more, save a dollar each sale. Simply buy five or more participating items and save a dollar each with your card. Croger, fresh for everyone. for everyone.