Muscle for Life with Mike Matthews - Book Club: My 10 Favorite Takeaways from "Yes!" by Goldstein, Martin, & Cialdini

Episode Date: February 20, 2023

My Book Club series is back! These are my top 10 key takeaways from Yes!: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive by Noah J. Goldstein, Steve J. Martin, and Robert Cialdini. “Can you recommend a book for…?” “What are you reading right now?” “What are your favorite books?” I get asked those types of questions a lot and, as an avid reader and all-around bibliophile, I’m always happy to oblige. I also like to encourage people to read as much as possible because knowledge benefits you much like compound interest. The more you learn, the more you know; the more you know, the more you can do; the more you can do, the more opportunities you have to succeed. On the flip side, I also believe there’s little hope for people who aren’t perpetual learners. Life is overwhelmingly complex and chaotic, and it slowly suffocates and devours the lazy and ignorant. So, if you’re a bookworm on the lookout for good reads, or if you’d like to get into the habit of reading, this book club for you. The idea here is simple: Every month, I’ll share a book that I’ve particularly liked, why I liked it, and several of my key takeaways from it. I’ll also keep things short and sweet so you can quickly decide whether the book is likely to be up your alley or not. Alright, let’s get to the takeaways. Timestamps: (0:00) - Please leave a review of the show wherever you listen to podcasts and make sure to subscribe and leave a comment! (4:26) - Decision fatigue. (5:09) - Devote training time on errors and how those errors can be avoided. (7:20) - Argue against your self interest. (7:38) - Search others for their virtues. (8:00) - Point out potential losses. (8:27) - Have product and company names that are easy to read and pronounce. (8:50) - Give gifts that are significant, unexpected, and personalized. (9:11) - My award-winning fitness books for men and women: https://legionathletics.com/products/books/ (11:10) - Commitment and consistency based strategies. (11:43) - Free the consumer from previous commitment. (12:17) - Mysterious influences. Mentioned on the Show: My award-winning fitness books for men and women: https://legionathletics.com/products/books/

Hello, hello, and welcome to another episode of Muscle for Life. I am your host, Mike Matthews. Thank you for joining me today for another installment in my book club series of episodes. And these are going to be coming back every month or so with a slightly new format. Previously, I would share five key takeaways from a book. I would also share some of my own thoughts on each takeaway. And now I'm just going to share 10 key takeaways, my 10 favorite takeaways from each book, because it's easier and faster and probably better, I think, for you, the listener.

I'm also going to be publishing these as articles over at LegionAthletics.com. So better for readers as well to learn interesting little tidbits and things that you can use or things you can just think about and determine whether the book is for you. So for example, if you like six, seven, eight of the takeaways that I share, then you probably are going to like the book and you are going to get even more out of it. But if you only like a couple of them, maybe two or three are interesting or useful to you, then the book is probably not for you. And so I think it will be easier for people to make that determination whether the book is likely for them when I share 10 takeaways rather than five plus my thoughts on those five. And so in today's episode, I am going to be sharing takeaways from the book, Yes and Goldstein and Martin. And yeah,

that's it. Three authors on this book. And one of those names may sound familiar to you, Cialdini, Robert Cialdini, because he wrote the classic book on persuasion, Influence. And whereas that book is more of an academic exploration of the science of, well, influence, rather than a practical playbook for influencing people. Although the newest edition, maybe the fourth edition, there is a new edition of Influence that came out semi-recently, and that has improved, I think, at least a little bit in the practicality department. But I would say it's still more of an

academic textbook than a practical playbook. So yes, on the other hand, is very practical. It offers a compilation of various evidence-based techniques for being more influential with just enough of the theoretical underpinnings to understand why they work and to provide interesting background information. And so then the people who will get the most from this book, from Yes, are those who can immediately apply its teachings, marketers, salespeople, negotiators, managers, executives, politicians, and so on. And while some of the methods discussed in the book were more interesting and meaningful than others, not all 50 chapters were riveting or were immediately useful, at least to me. I was able to use at least some of the information in the book to get real results in my businesses. That's where I applied what I learned in this book in mostly the marketing of my sports nutrition

company, Legion. I also thought that the book was an engaging read and it provided a lot of value for the number of pages that it contained and it delivered on its promise. And those are really my four key criteria for judging a problem solver book like this. Was I able to use some of the information to get results? Was it engaging? Did I enjoy reading it? Did it provide a lot of value for the pages it contained? Or was it full of a lot of fluff or filler or stuff you just had to grind through that was boring, not useful, not memorable, etc. And did it deliver on its primary promise? I know I said promise previously, but I really should have said primary promise because often books make multiple promises, but there's one big one. And that's usually the one that we are mostly interested

in when we buy these books. So anyway, this book, yes, scored well on each of those criteria. And that is why I am recommending it. And so now let's get to the takeaways. So the first one, quote, when so many choices are available, consumers often find the decision-making process frustrating, perhaps due to the burden of having to differentiate so many options from one another in an attempt to make the best decision. This may result in disengagement from the task at hand, leading to an overall reduction in motivation and interest in the product as a whole. A worthwhile exercise would be to review the extent of your product portfolio and ask yourself the following question. Where we have customers who may not be clear about their requirements,

might the number of choices we offer be causing them to seek other and potentially fewer alternatives elsewhere? Second takeaway, quote, although many companies typically focus their training exclusively on the positive, in other words, on how to make good decisions, the results of this study suggest that a sizable portion of the training should be devoted to how others have made errors in the past and how those errors could have been and can be avoided. Okay, I have to make a little comment on that. I wish reviewing failures was more popular in the how-to non-fiction content space as opposed to only talking about the people who made it because that easily creates a survivorship bias. And there's a lot we can learn from the many people who did not make it, the many

more people who did not make it compared to the people who did make it. So in business, for example, we can learn a lot from people who have succeeded, especially people who have interesting stories, who have done great things, overcome great obstacles. There's also a motivational component. It's nice to read about people who have made it because then it inspires us to believe that we can make it too. However, we can also learn a lot from people who have failed. We can learn a lot from people who have failed to establish a successful business. So their business was fatally flawed from the beginning, or maybe something about their execution was fatally flawed from the beginning. And eventually it all fell apart.

We can learn a lot from people who achieved a certain level of success. Again, if we're just talking about business, who built a business up to a certain point and then subsequently failed. I know several people who have done that, build up a successful business. Everything is great. And then start screwing up and then start screwing up in bigger ways and then following those screw ups with even bigger screw-ups. And eventually, in a few cases, they lost their businesses and now have nothing.

There's a lot to learn from those stories. Anyway, let's get back to the takeaways, shall we? Here is the next one, the third one. Quote, Arguing against your self-interest, which can include mentioning a drawback of your arguments, proposals or products creates the perception that you and your organization are honest and trustworthy. This puts you in a position to be more persuasive when promoting your genuine strengths. OK, number four, quote, follow the wisdom of Benjamin Franklin. Search others for their virtues.

Quote, follow the wisdom of Benjamin Franklin. Search others for their virtues. Many of us spend too much time finding faults in the people we deal with in our everyday lives. If instead we try to search their character for what we like about them, we'll like them more. And as a result, they'll like us more. Everyone comes out ahead. Number five, quote, similarly, if you're hoping to persuade your colleagues to work with you on a particular project, it's important to point out not just what they stand to gain in terms of opportunities and experience, but also that they stand to lose out on those very same

factors. In fact, research has shown that potential losses figure far more heavily in managers' decision-making than the same things presented as gains. Takeaway six, quote, often people are so focused on seemingly more influential aspects of their projects that they overlook the first piece of information that will be communicated to its audience, its name. All else being equal, the easier it is to read and pronounce, the more likely consumers, potential stockholders, and other decision makers will be to view it positively. Seven, quote, this research clearly shows the value of giving gifts that are significant, unexpected, and personalized. To ensure

that any gift you give or favor that you perform is most appreciated, make sure to take some time to find out what gift to the recipient would best fit those three important criteria. If you like what I'm doing here on the podcast and elsewhere, then you will probably like my award-winning fitness books for men and women of all ages and abilities, which have sold over 2 million copies, have received over 15,000 four and five star reviews on Amazon, and which have helped tens of thousands of people build their best body ever. Now, a caveat, my books and programs cannot give you a lean and toned Hollywood body in 30 days, and they are not full of dubious diet and exercise hacks and shortcuts for gaining lean muscle and melting belly fat

faster than a sneeze in a cyclone, but they will show you exactly how to eat and exercise to lose up to 35 pounds of fat or more if you need to lose more or want to lose more and gain eye-catching amounts of muscle definition and strength. And even better, you will learn how to do those things without having to live in the gym, give up all of the foods or drinks that you love, or do long, grueling workouts that you hate. And with my books and programs, you will do that. You will transform your physique faster than you probably think is possible, or I will give you your money back. If you are unsatisfied with any of my books or programs, the results, anything, for whatever reason, just let me know and you will get a full refund on the spot. Now, I do have several books

and programs, including Bigger Leaner Stronger, Th, leaner, stronger, and muscle for life. And to help you understand which one is right for you, it's pretty simple. If you are a guy aged 18 to let's say 40 to 45, bigger, leaner, stronger is the book and program for you. If you are a gal, same age range, thinner, leaner, stronger is going to be for you. And if you are a guy or gal, 40 to maybe 45 plus muscle for life is for you. Eight quote, in cases in which a business can't secure even a small initial product purchase, this commitment and consistency based strategy has other uses. For example, potential clients who are reluctant to use your service may be more inclined to do so if they're first asked to take a small step, such as agreeing to an initial 10 minute appointment. Similarly, a marketing research department is more likely to get people to answer

a large number of survey questions by first asking them if they'd be willing to answer a brief survey. Number nine, quote, to ensure our message is optimally persuasive, we need not only to free them from their previous commitment, but also to avoid framing their previous decision as a mistake. Perhaps the most productive method is to praise their previous decision as correct at the time they made it, pointing out that the previous choices they made were the right ones, given the evidence and information they had at the time they made it, pointing out that the previous choices they made were the right ones, given the evidence and information they had at the time, can help free them from such a commitment and allow them to focus on your proposal without the need for loss of face or inconsistency.

And number 10, quote, the nationwide search revealed that 257 dentists were named Walter, revealed that 257 dentists were named Walter, 270 were named Jerry, and 482 were named Dennis. That means that dentists are about 43% more likely to be named Dennis than you'd expect if name similarity had absolutely no effect on career choice. Similarly, people whose names begin with G-E-O, e.g. George, Jeffrey, are disproportionately likely to do research in the geosciences, e.g. geology. In fact, even just the first letter of a person's name influences his or her career choice. For example, they found that hardware store owners are about 80% more likely to have names that start with the letter H than the letter R, but roofers are about 70% more likely to have names that start with the letter R than the letter H. This is odd, isn't it? It's almost like glitch in the matrix kind of stuff, right? I'll continue.

Quote, people move to states that are similar to their own names. For example, people who move to Florida are disproportionately likely to be named Florence, and people who move to Louisiana are disproportionately likely to be named Louise. People move to cities with numbers in them that match their own birth date numbers. For example, cities with the number two in their names, like Two Harbors, Minnesota, For example, cities with the number two in their names, like Two Harbors, Minnesota, have a disproportionate number of residents who were born on February 2nd, 2-2. Whereas cities that have the number three in their names, like Three Forks, Montana,

have a disproportionate number of people who were born on March 3rd, 3-3. People choose to live on streets whose names match their own. In other words, someone named Mr. Washington is more likely to choose to live on Washington Street than someone named Mr. Jefferson. People choose to marry others who have similar sounding first or last names, all else being roughly equal. If Eric, Erica, Charles, and Charlotte all meet one another for the first time, Erica will be more likely to become romantically involved with Eric than with Charles, and the opposite is more likely to occur with Charlotte. When asked to trust their feelings and intuitions, people prefer products whose first letters matched the first letters of their own name. So someone named Alan might be more likely to put the candy bar Almond Joy toward the top of his list than someone named Nick,

who might be more likely to put Nutrageous toward the top of his list. I know that last one was a lot, but it prickles the processors, right? It makes you think about free will. How much free will do we really have or do at least some of us really have? How many decisions do we make or have we made based on mysterious influences that we are not even aware of? How many of our beliefs and attitudes are tied to mysterious influences that we are not aware of and to cultural programming and propaganda and peer pressure and to tribalism and other factors that really have nothing to do with our own reasoning, our own critical thinking, our own ideas and opinions, and even our own interests and desires. Anyway, that's enough commentary from the cheap seats. I hope you liked this episode and I will have another one for you in a month or so.

Well, I hope you liked this episode. I hope you found it helpful. And if you did, subscribe to the show because it makes sure that you don't miss new episodes. And it also helps me because it increases the rankings of the show a little bit, which of course then makes it a little bit more easily found by other people who may like it just as much as you. And if you didn't like something about this episode or about the show in general, or if you have ideas or suggestions or just feedback to share, shoot me an email, mike at muscleforlife.com, muscleforlife.com, and let me know what I could do better or just,

uh, what your thoughts are about maybe what you'd like to see me do in the future. I read everything myself. I'm always looking for new ideas and constructive feedback. So thanks again for listening to this episode. And I hope to hear from you soon.