My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 718: Shaq-cuse!

Episode Date: July 1, 2024

Our comedy glands are fired up and ready to juice! We're positively gooshing with bits about very personal underpants, mysterious Dunkin tie-ins, and Shaqsketball. Suggested talking points: Get Me Pictures of the Human Torch, Chris of Choice, Skippos, Shaqsident Palestine Children's Relief Fund: https://www.pcrf.net/

The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? One, two, three, four! It's the start of something beautiful A small acquaintance has blossomed It's ripened into a precious friendship I could've never seen what was coming for me Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach

My life, it feels like My life, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with you My life, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with you This is true, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with two My life, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah Woof woof, I almost forgot. I don't want to. McElroy. I'm not here to sow seeds of discord

amongst the Travis's constituents. No, I should hope not Griffin, if I find out that that is happening, Retribution will be swift. Bro, no sedition guarantee on my part, but I do just want to say the king is slipping. No sedition, but the emperor has no clothes. So that's all.

That's a different thing though, Griffin. How I record this show from the ways down is my thing. That's true. Say your name. I'm Griffin McElroy. If I had my own nation, I would never ever forget about it or I would let you feel like I had forgotten about it for even a second.

But you have to forgive me, Griffin, because we recorded a metric ton of podcasts, especially My Brother and My Brother and Me last week. That's true. We went on what everyone's calling a wildly successful tour. Yeah, sure. And at Tyson's Corner and St. Louis and Kansas City were amazing, but we have done a lot of My Brother

and My Brother and Me in the last week. And so, that's kind of an innovator, a revolutionary, what I've done, because I don't know if we have like an hour of My Brother, My Brother, and Me in the tank, right? So what I did, I hired a young photojournalist to get me a bunch of pictures of Spider-Man that I would like to share with you now.

He took all these pictures of Spider-Man for me. So, just to be clear, your intro is, we are too tired from doing our show three times. We possess some sort of adrenal gland from which we produce the show that, perhaps due to age or other sort of genetic factors, we are unable to refill fast enough to make jokes for one hour today. So instead we're gonna look at together some pictures

of Spider-Man in our largely audio based podcast. Well, and it's so important. These are new, fresh, hot pictures of Spider-Man in our largely audio-based podcast. Well, and it's so important, these are new, fresh, hot pictures of Spider-Man that this young photojournalist took for me. Okay, so these are new pictures, these are new pictures of Spider-Man we're gonna watch instead of doing the show we do once an hour every week. Yeah, so this is one he's-

Okay, Griffin, you have made an excellent statement, and I do wanna zero in on that. Please. The show we make for one hour once a week, that's the covenant, isn't it? That is the deal that we have made with God and our listeners. And we had to do like three of them in a row.

Yes. And that is a violation. Yes, so again, drill right in on that. For three of the 168 hours present in every week, we had to do jokes, squish out our glands, to make all the comedy come out that we had. It was like 80 minutes. The idea that in a seven day span

that we would spend four out of 168 hours making jokes for you is you selfish, greedy pig. Okay, you're, all right, let's talk about this. Griffin, you're wasting, can I just say, you're wasting a lot of time. I have 350 glossy 11 by 17 pictures. I'm stoked to get to the, I'm making sure I understand. Yeah, I paid him $25,000.

We can just dig a little deeper on what Griffin has laid out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just whenever we can get back to these pictures. If what you're saying, if you believe. Yeah. Definitely do it. I got one with his mask off.

We can see who he is. We definitely do it. I'll make you a deal. You button up one button, I will only make you wait five minutes. Okay, listen. I just wanna drill down. If you believe five minutes. Okay, listen, I just wanna drill down. If you believe what you're saying, Griffin,

then we have to produce 52 of these a year, right? Then by your logic, on Jan one, two, and a little bit of three, we should just shit out the whole kick-boodle, and then we're yacht bound, baby, for the rest of the year. From episode five on of that three day horror marathon that you have just devised for us, would be-

Notice the lack of bathroom breaks. We would have less of a- It would happen during. We would be set still for something else to talk about. We would be less sort of a show created for like a comedy consuming audience and instead a fleet of healthcare workers, scientists will then become sort of our core audience

as they listen. As we go places no other human mind could even conceive of after making jokes for five hours in three days. Yeah, I have a picture of Spider-Man killing a man here. Like, you guys, I'm- Just wait! I paid top dollar, okay. I'm just saying how many of these, Griffin,

so we can agree that your argument is somewhere between 52 in a row and one a week. One a week. Yeah. So what's the number of these that you think that you could crank out where you're arguing against Travis's treatment of the Spider-Man?

Don't get me wrong, Juice, we're approaching the limit. I just, and this is my young, this is my virility shining through. Yeah, that's that multivitamin. I'd say that multivitamin I've been taking, my joke glands are swollen and tender and ready to juice. All right, me too Griffin, I'm fired up. And Travis, the time has come.

The ramp has been built and I don't think, I've actually called in the AP, no one has ever seen a joke ramp built like this before when the target of it is so absolutely amorphous. Microscopic, yeah. Can I tell you, I'm looking at these pictures for the first time, they're all hand drawn in crayon, if I'm being honest.

So these are not, so when you said photojournalist, you meant like largely a crayon based. Yeah, yeah, yeah being honest. Not a one of them. So when you said photojournalist, you meant like largely a crayon-based reporter. Well, I never looked at him. I paid him his money up front. Okay. I think I got taken for a fool. Was he, could you see through his work clothes? Uh-huh.

What if I just ended the sentence right there? Could you see peeking through his work clothes, red webbed garments. Yeah, but I thought he was Carnage. You thought he was Carnage, but you still hired him for the job anyway. Well, if he could give me the photos I need to finish, Carnage might need to work.

To finish the newspaper. Sure. What if Carnage came in and J. Jonah Jameson was like, what the fuck are these? And Carnage was like, pictures of Carnage. And he was like, I don't want these. I want pictures of Spider-Man. Do you think that on like-

But I, Carl Bigerman don't know Spider-Man. I only know Carnage. Unlike the 900 picture of Spider-Man that J. Jonah Jameson received from Spider-Man, do you think carnage. Unlike the 900 picture of Spider-Man that J. Jonah Jameson received from Spider-Man, do you think he was like, all right, Peter, that's enough pictures of Spider-Man. Now give me pictures of the human torch. And he was like, I don't know how to do that.

I actually don't, that's not something I could do. Okay, wait, guys, can I, whoa, Travis, there is definitely been a point at which Peter Parker's like, I can climb on walls and I'm hard up for cash and I hate the human torch. I bet he's been like paparazzi. I bet Spider-Man, there's been a point where someone's like,

hey Johnny, look out the window. Spider-Man's like, ah, damn it. My man's in Avengers. It wasn't me. Spider-Man, it was you. It was you, Spider-Man, we saw you. My man is in Avengers Tower, making all the Avengers uncomfortable. Yeah. Just like, yeah,

we're gonna go get Thanos, get his ass, rip his hand off. Hulk, stay right there. Hulk, look angry. Pout, good. Peter, bring me pictures of Thanos! Oh, okay. Oh, fuck. Now I've got some mixed priorities. What about snuff pictures?

I hear a dead picture of Thanos. Holy shit, Peter! How did you get that, Parker? He was on a different planet, I think! I was on Mars. I was on Titan. Cut his fucking head off. I mean, Star-Lord did.

Star-Lord did. I got a lot of questions, Parker. There's nothing funny about talking about the MCU. Can you guys imagine doing a podcast just about the MCU? The MCU is funny. It's Chris Pratt. If you get to Chris Pratt in a conversation,

it's a comedy vortex. You're close, huh? It's it. There's nothing there. It's nothing. You suddenly realize like, yeah, I don't wanna talk about this. Yeah.

No, he's not the Snoopy people. He's the dirty dog. Who's that dirty dog in Sno people. He's the dirty dog. Who's that dirty dog in Snoopy? Who's the dirty dog in Snoopy? Yeah, who's the dirty dog in Snoopy? Joe Dirt? Pigpen.

No. Pigpen. Joe Dirt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But Pigpen's funny. Something dirt. Wait, Joe Dirt? Joe Dirt? They're so cool. They're so cool.

Hold on. Joe Dirt is David Spade. And then those guys tell like an uncle? You guys can feel it, right? Like we had momentum, and then we started talking about the David Spade. And then you guys tell like an uncle. You guys can feel it, right? Like we had momentum and then we started talking about the Marvel cinematic universe. And it just fell off. And we've already clarified that Soopie's not funny.

Spike, right off a cliff. Spike is his name. Fresh us would never. Fresh us would never. Fresh us would never. Fresh us would never. Four hours of goofs us, we're leaning on those everlasting ours of Chris Pratt.

They're so big and they'll hold us right up. Yeah. Well, give me a, oh, give me an Evans? All day, that guards at Chris Pratt. They're so big, gonna hold us right up. Yeah, well give me an Evans. All day, that's my Chris of choice. Please start reading a question. Everybody, what's your favorite Chris? What's your favorite Chris? Pine. Parnell.

Oh. God, you got it in one. Catan? Juice, I think you might have the wrong lights on because it seems like you're at a library computer. As your beautiful baby griffin, is this what you wanted? Every crack and crevice. Tell me where the files are.

Every crack and crevice. Where's the microfilm? Now this is cool. What do you think about this? Ooh, I like that. Like a dramatic noir. We're gonna win an Oscar now. It really speaks to the duality. Tinker, Taylor, Soldier, Justin.

Yeah, man, you look fucking wild. No, dude. Yeah, dude. You still look like Two-Face, pal. What? You look crazy. What is it? Does it look too sexy?

What is the problem? Yeah. I think you look like you're sexy Two-Face. I don't wanna stand up to fix it again. Imagine if Two-Face was, half of his face was sexy, and the other half was even sexier. That's what we're looking at.

Here's the problem. If I want it flat on me, I have to stand up and walk all the way over. I have to take the headphones off again. Are you guys okay? Are you guys okay that doing four hours of jokes and standing up to walk around your desk? It wasn't just four hours of jokes.

We also had to sit in the green room for like an hour and a half beforehand playing Stardew Valley, Griffin. Playing Stardew Valley and eating Skittles. Like, no, dude, I get it. Our life is hard, okay? I understand that. I mean, football players play what?

Three hours of football once a week? You know what I mean? I think they do have to practice doing football. We have to practice? Okay. You guys don't practice jokes? It's better, Juice, it's better. Okay, I'm ready for another show. Bring me those pictures of Spider-Man.

All right, it's time to take another question. What's the first question? What do you do if you're Pagliacci from Justin? Yeah, yeah, sure. That're Pagliacci from Justin? Yeah, yeah, sure. That was Pagliacci's issue of Memory Surfs is he went to the doctor, he's like, dude, I had to do four fucking shows this week.

And at one point they were like, Pagliacci, walk around this small table. And I was like- And no one's a podcaster for the podcasters, you know? Yeah, yeah. Is it weird to wear pattern underwear based on the friend I am hanging out with? For example, I was about to hang out with my friend

who really likes marine biology, so I wore my underwear with octopi on them. Additional info, thank you. It isn't sexual in any nature. The friend will not see them. This is for me a fun thing. I do this frequently, maybe once a week. I have a wide variety, so it's easy to keep up with.

Thank you. Thank you for the context. I appreciate that. I wanna get your guys gut reaction just right. Yes or no? Is it weird? Go. Yep.

Yeah, man. Wrong. Trav? Can I try again? Yeah, try again, Justin. No. Yes, still, absolutely. If you found out a friend was doing this to you,

you wouldn't be like, huh. That's, that you chose to, to you, doing this to you. Why that particular preposition? Hearing you say that, Griffin, might reveal a fundamental difference between Twix, you and I. Cause if I find out that like a dear friend,

and this is the thing I wanna qualify here, one of my best friends, I find out Bradbury, when we hang out, wears microphone underwear to like set, like to be like, this is a fun thing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, finish the set, you show me the next 10 words. I wanted to say set expectations for her, but that's not what I meant. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, fun socks themed to the friend you're hanging with. Okay, this is actually great. This will help deconstruct this question and any sort of taboo nature it might possess. Because for me, that's also pretty fucking weird.

If someone's like, hey look, I wore my U socks. It's like, I don't need to be involved in that part of your experience. Can I say, I really, now we're getting to it, because I think that, and I'm realizing this as I say it, I think I'm uncomfortable with people thinking about me. Wow! That's it, I mean, that's actually it.

The idea that someone has thought about me makes me uncomfortable, I think. Sure. I'm uncomfortable with that. It makes me uncomfortable. Okay, I'm not that far, Travis. I I don't I'm not I'm not that far Travis I don't I want to set set the boundaries here I'm not that far

But I am far enough that if somebody sees a shirt hanging in their closet and be like Griffin would like this I'll wear it. That's weird, man Why is that weird? Because you're friend who's hanging out with you and wants you to be happy and they're like this will make them all they'll like this shirt I'm gonna get a compliment on it from them because they'll appreciate it. No, okay, see, I agree with Travis here because I know that like, Slice,

we both like patterned Disney shirts. So I'll wear one of those if I know I'm gonna be seeing Slice. Yeah, but, okay, maybe I do need to take a few of the goal posts back a little bit. And we have like our matching Cifaco t-shirts, and all, you know, we'll like plan this. That's a pre-plan, that's a pre-organized.

If you're wearing a thing because you think you're gonna match someone, I think that's a different conversation. Okay, but now you're matching their energy, Griffin, because you have matching socks. But in that way, it is a conversation. It's not like, and no, I've moved the goalposts way too far forward here,

because I thought that I was gonna have a little bit more support from my brother. I wanna know, I wanna back you up on the socks though. The socks is, here's the problem with the socks, right? I show up in a shirt that I think my friend would like. React to this right now. Boom bang, right there, out the door. Right there.

To get this to point of socks, it's gotta be one of two things. Huh, someone's got asked, huh, interesting socks. Or the other thing is the person be like, I see you notice my socks. Both of those are unsustainable. Suboptimal. Yeah, suboptimal.

Let me unravel you, Justin. Now, let's remove the idea of them ever seeing the socks with a little thing I call underpants, which are hidden. Now you're just wearing it for you to make you happy. But we've abstracted it out enough now that I no longer know how I feel. Okay, no, this has affirmed my point. I got him, I broke him, I've unraveled his psyche.

This has reaffirmed my point. The underwear and the never ever telling is not great because the whole time, no, Travis, please. It's just for you. Please, please. The whole time you're hanging out with them, you're technically lying. You're technically, you've got a, you made a secret.

You made a secret. You made a secret. You know it, they don't. I've got a secret. You don't tell them the secret. That's a big lie you're telling. Here's the qualifier I will have, because I don't wanna say that universally it's not weird. I wanna say, if this was a friend

that somehow found out what underpants you were wearing and that they matched them, would they think it was whimsical and quirky and funny, or would they think it was weird? Cause I have friends that if I did this- Survey says, like 99% of people is like, no way, man. You need to work on your friend group, my dude. Cause me and Bob and Bradbury,

I thought about it again. We showed up and the three of us found out we were wearing underpants that complimented one another in some way. That's not the same thing. We think that was the cutest thing in the world. That's what I'm saying, man. It's not a- Trav, it's not a hundred. It's 99. 99. Because some-

You're never gonna get to a hundred. There are strong, supportive, contemporary male friendships out there that would be definitely down with that. And I'm so deeply jealous that you do have that in mind. You and I could have that, deeply jealous that you do have that. You and I could have that, Griffin, if you would let us. Super Wicked don't even want it, which maybe means I'm doomed to not want it or have it ever. It's that it's on the crotch though, isn't it?

Yeah. That doesn't bother me. It is that it's on the crotch though, isn't it? It would be weird to be- It's that I wanted to have a crotch secret about you. I was about to say if my face was on the T-shirt, but my face is on a lot of T-shirts right now. And I actually love that when that happens. Again, a different, I appreciate the comparison,

fundamentally different thing. If I found out you were wearing underwear with my face on it, that would be a fucking deal breaker. Unrelated, if anyone knows where I can get custom underwear made, please let me know. Travis, not kidding, cut and me know. Cut and run. Wait, just- What if we partnered with Bombus to make underwear with Griffin's face on it?

I don't know where Juice just went, but I've never been more suspended in a state of terror by a contributor's departure on this program than I am right now. Hey, Juice. Seamless, Justin. What if we partner with Bombas to make underwear with Gryffin's face on it? Where did you go and why are you making

that fucking face, man? I was sneaking back in because I was hoping you guys weren't gonna talk about my absence. I needed to get my phone because Dad has the girls and well, I don't need to finish the sentence. Oh, I thought, okay, please understand, from my perspective, I was like, I sure hope no one wears underwear with my face on it, and you were like,

okay, you chose that moment. That must have been absolutely wild for you, and I am so sorry. Yes, thank you so much for recognizing that, and I'm so sorry. Yes, thank you so much. Thanks for making space for that. Now, I just wanna make it clear for our listeners at home, I can joke about and maybe execute this.

None of you can. None of you. Okay, we are, ha, Trav. Are they friends with you, Griffin? This is the height of parasocial relationship. If someone showed up that you did not know and you'd never met him before and said, hey, you're on my underpants.

Let's put it on a scale, Griffin. Are you more comfortable with complete stranger showing up saying, I've got your face on my underpants than me saying it. Who are you more comfortable with? This is the fucked up, you ready for this? I'm about to fucking mind freak you, dude. Are you ready?

Yeah. Travis, Travis comes to me, we hang out, he leaves, later tells me, or never tells me, I was wearing Griffin underwear. That sucks, right? A stranger doing that to me, who gives a shit? Like, I don't know, I'll never know about it. I don't know who you are.

But, but, but, but, but, flip them. You come to me, you say, and by the way, I'm wearing the Griffin underwear. I would be like, ugh. But if a stranger does that to me, that also sucks. That sucks more, it has to suck more. That sucks way more, sucks way more. Because if the stranger comes to me and is like,

and I'm wearing Griffin underwear, that's the worst moment of my fucking life. Do you understand that there's like, every context matters in all of these kinds of situations, but I would say the best way to sort of avoid all of them is to not do this thing. What if it's a bunch of hunky sexy hard bodies they all could do at the same time?

Griffith, they say, hey, and we're wearing them now. No good, no good. What if it's some of the people you respect most in business and politics and science, and they come to you and they're like, hey, anytime I work on my science stuff. Sanjay Gupta. Oh man, if Gupta rolls up.

Mark Cuban. Mark Cuban, all your heroes. If I get Cuban and Gupta and they reveal their matching Griffin McElroy underwear, I'm still, I don't, I still actually, I'll be like stoked to meet both you equally righteous dudes. But no thank you. Okay.

All right, to each his own, I guess. Yeah, that's the beauty of it, isn't it? I guess it is, Griffin, I guess it is. The beauty of life? I don't know, man, we've been talking about underwear for so long, I would love another question. I'm in a workplace book club for the summer. God, I'm jealous of that.

Why don't we do that? I can't do a book club. As soon as I have the expectation that I have to read something, it becomes homework and I put it in. We also read exceedingly different types of literature. Oh, that's true. I enjoy mysteries and biographies and Griffin likes smut.

Yeah, Griffin does love smut. I love fairy smut. So we like historical, historical, nonfiction smut. Historical fairy smut, non-historical robo smut, time smut. Griffin is now just describing the Chuck Tingle catalog. That's literally all the genres. I joined because I like the other people in the club

and because they usually get together to talk about the book somewhere cool, like a museum or zoo. My problem is that I'm now five chapters in the book and I hate it. How can I save myself the mental agony so I can get to that sweet end goal of a workday at the zoo?

Or should I just fess up and get to the FOMO now? And no, the book does not have a movie slash TV slash game adaptation. That's from Bookin' on Bossman's Dime in Florida. There needs to be more video game adaptations of classic novels. There's really not many of them. Not enough. I would love that.

They did a Christmas Carol metroidvania recently, I think. Oh? Absolutely rips ass, yeah. And I think one of the Bible too, but I don't think a lot of people are doing that for non-religious book clubs. We gotta play Bible Adventures again. You can, a lot of the time, find this book in a sound format that you can make the guy go so fucking fast.

Yes. Like, I'm not a big audio book guy, but then when I realized like, hey, you know, there's some gaps in my, my oeuvre that I could fill in by going on a drive and slapping this guy on five times speed. Yeah, crank it out. Just fucking, fucking crank dude.

It was the best times, it was the worst times. Ha ha ha ha ha. Call me a shriller if it is. Ha ha ha ha ha. We said Jack Loose Take Off, and we remember again, Jack Loose Dusty. Ha ha ha ha. Is it, now I'm thinking that this is a service

we could offer, just having Justin do 10 second book synopsis videos. That's cool. I would love that. Two guys farmers, one makes a uh oh gets shot. Bitten. Miceman, bite. Wait, like and subscribe.

Miceman love you. Click on like and subscribe. Two guys, one of them shoots the other one, bye. Bye. Paul's good, but he's probably banned. They're saying everywhere. That's a dude. That's's good, but he's probably banned. There's sand everywhere. That's a dude. That's a dude, yeah, I get you.

Paul's good, but he's probably banned. There's sand everywhere. Heaps of sucks. That's the end of Wuthering Heights, bye! I've never been in a book club, but I do record a video game podcast called The Besties every week, where sometimes we have to play some real fucking stinkers.

Yeah, what do you do? You play some real fucking stinkers. Yeah. What you do? You play them because it's your job. Hmm. Yeah. It's your job. Sometimes your job. This is your job. Um, let me, I would say it's not possible.

Mine friends that if you have fallen off a book that you have so many reasons that you have to like, that you feel compelled to read that. That someone else in the group is, this could be a like leaning, you know, like all the sticks fell over and they're leaning, standing up against each other, where they're waiting for one person in the book club to be like, this book sucks.

And then everyone else is like, yes, thank you. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Whoa, okay. You come to the group and you Yes, yes, yes, yes. Whoa, okay. You come to the group, you say, hey, listen, I just came up with a good idea, guys, and I wanna see what you all think about it. They're called Skippos. Yeah. And you take out a coaster

that says Skippo on it. He said, everybody, when they join the club, gets one Skippo. Right. And you can earn Skippos by bringing snacks or by cleaning up afterwards or by bringing in friends for referrals. You get a skippo when they get a skippo. Yeah, you memorize the Bible verse,

you get a skippo, you get skippos, and there's like- 10 cans of food to donate. And then you look around, right? You watch the group. What you're gonna do is you're gonna keep on promising this until everybody is wild about Skippos. You can't stop until you see a lot of enthusiasm nodding.

If it takes, there's tiered layers of Skippos. There's like an ARG. There's gold Skippos. Yes. There's a cryptocurrency tie-in. Cryptocurrency that override a Skippo. Yeah. There's a Skippo,

there's what's called a Skippo reverse where you can undo someone else's Skippo. And what's that? It's a draw four. Okay, so then you're like someone else's skippo and what's that it's a draw for Okay, they have to like four books this week you get everybody excited for it. They're like ah okay We're all on board me first fuck Nathaniel Hawthorne peace I'm burning my skippo This is actually a beta skippo I also get eight skippos because I invented skippo as a reward for getting skippos

Before I've been mining skippos, because I invented Skippo as a reward for getting skippos. Before I've been mining skippos for months. Before we put this platform into service, I'd like to beta test the skippos personally myself. I'm gonna try a skippo this week, work out some of the bugs, I'll come back at you next week with another skippo. Books are so fucking boring, all of them every time. Now, what if, and this is a mechanic

that we know works, we've seen it. Tribal council, anonymous vote. Yes. After the first five chapters of a book, the next session, you guys get together and you all put a torch in front of the book. You go off to a private booth. You write down either like this book sucks

or we keep reading it, and if there's more votes for this book sucks, you put out the torch and you burn the book. Yeah. I don't actually think you would wanna do that last part. But you were really onto something. Which part, you don't wanna put out the torch? No, no, no.

Travis, I hate that. I feel like Skippos is a way more elegant solution than what you just devised. Oh yeah, okay, you could use the skippo and burn the book. That's fine. No, I think it's the book burning that I don't like. I mean, but if you, there is an option. Then what do you do with them?

If the book sucks, Griffin, then you hate it. What, you don't like what the book has to say. You bury them so the paper can turn back into trees. That's a good point. I think that it would be pretty kick-ass. I bet there's someone out there who's taking books and turning them into like turn-by houses or bee houses and shit.

I think, normalize, when you reach a point in the book, you're reading for your book club and you don't wanna read anymore, you tear out every page that came after that and you doodle in with a Sharpie like, and then they all got married, the end. Yeah. And then you roll up to book club and you be like,

I don't know what the fuck you guys are talking about. My book ended at chapter five and they all got married and then it said the end. So like all this stuff you're saying about Jim going to war and coming back and being different and then Susan was a robot, I didn't get any of that shit in my apparently abridged copy of Nathaniel Hawthorne's best book. Start sneaking in references and summaries

of things that happened in the most recent episode of Bridgerton you watched. Yes. And just like as it's part of the conversation, right? And you're like, yeah, and I love that conversation between Benedict and Eloise. And eventually they're gonna start being like, what? And they're gonna get interested

in what you're talking about. What's that? It's not a book club anymore. Now it's that we go to the zoo once and we can talk about Bridgerton Club, which is way better in so many ways. Here's the way a Justin Macero would handle this, because I did a lot of this in middle school.

You go in, you don't say fucking shit. You let everybody else run their mouth, run their mouth, run their mouth. And then eventually it ends. Or someone's like, and Justin, you've been pretty quiet. And you're like, oh yes, you've noticed. And then you just recite some shit that you heard other people say.

I think Grant nailed it when he said blah, blah, blah, blah, that so echoed everything that I said. And everybody's like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That so echoed everything that I said. And everybody's like, man, I really appreciate your support, man. It's like, yeah, absolutely good. So if you could say something like this, oh, you've noticed, yes, it's just, as I was listening and trying to dig it all in,

I saw that monkey over there and he stuck his finger in a butthole. And that made me think about what Grant said earlier. What the fuck are you, oh, at the zoo. Trav, I forgot about the zoo element of this question and I thought you just had a stroke. Ha ha! So Trav, you're like, in Trav's world of the zoo,

it's like, that's, ah, you've noticed. Actually, I was about to say, oh shit, panda! Everybody look, look at this guy go! Did I just say, okay, listen, we've been- I was about to say oh shit Panda everybody look look at this guy go I just say okay listen we think it's not a Museum cafe or whatever you talk about the book that's fine You're going to a zoo where there's so much shit Going on at any given time even a museum there's stuff to look at but a zoo the stuff is moving around It's loud people are walking around and I'm supposed to focus on a fucking book while I'm there?

No way. When I could see a hippo or whatever? What are you talking about? The world's best book cannot hold a candle to the world's worst hippopotamus. This is what I'm saying. Everybody's always saying that, aren't they? In terms of the value they provide me,

hippopotamus overbook every day of the week. I could watch a penguin fucking like rocking itself through the water and you expect me to talk about fucking blithering heights? Incredible, no way. Get off. Yeah, no way. Get off the butt, I don't wanna hear.

So glad we continue to take horrible positions on this show. Books, books, penguins, yay. I feel like Snoopy was a test balloon that we sent up to see if it would be okay for us to shit talk. How boring Snoopy is. I don't know why I'm doing this character.

There's a lot of books. I'm reading a book right now about books. So like, believe me. You've missed my point. I love books. If you expect me to hold a conversation thoughtfully and insightfully talking about my feelings on something,

and you put me in a place where there's so much stuff Going on sure what the fuck did you expect? Yeah, right like we meet in a living room will chat you want to have like a book club while a movie is on at A movie theater. What are you talking about? That sounds not only anybody suggested think anybody suggested that whatsoever, but I'm into it. Well, a zoo is like a movie of life. A zoo is like a movie of, well, not my life. If you're watching Zootopia. I wish, I mean. Oh man, me too.

Let's have a book club about Zootopia. I've got feelings. Yeah. Hey listen, let's take a quick break and then we'll come back and we'll talk about a more great, great advice for you, our beloved listeners. Hey let me tell you something, I'm very excited about this. I mean this very sincerely.

Oh yeah. I am something of a gardener, completely amateur, but one of the things, especially as a homeowner and somebody who tries to not disappoint my entire neighborhood, mulch and stuff is so, oh, it's so expensive. Yeah. Doing that stuff. So heavy too. Oh, it's so heavy, it's so expensive. Yeah. Oh, doing that stuff. So heavy too. Oh, it's so heavy, it's so expensive.

Sometimes it stinks like butts. And I gotta figure out like what of it is like good or whatever. And then I go to like the hardware store and I have to appear to be an adult who knows about mulch. Yeah. I don't know that. That's why I'm excited to tell everybody about Chip Drop, which is a service for gardeners in Arborist.

And gardeners can sign up to get free wood chips, get wood chip mulch or logs delivered and Arborist sign up to access inexpensive sites where they can drop their wood chips and logs. It's a perfect map. I've got wood chips and logs. I need wood chips and logs. Well, have we got a deal for you because Chip Drop in Chip Trip, Chip.

It's fun to say, like, it's called chip drop. And now that we've said it once good, we can just blaze right through them. Yeah, they encourage people to transfer their arts and communities by providing free wood chips and information about how to use them. And you can do so much cool stuff with wood chips. It's not just like, you know, malts or so much stuff.

And it's amazing. Shitty dominoes. I mean, any, like anything, man. You gotta check it out. Whether you have a bunch of trees you're trying to get rid of or a bunch of weeds you're trying to get rid of or anywhere in between, I guess. You just, here's the way it works.

People pull up plants and trees that say, man, screw these things. And someone else is like, wait, don't screw those things. Or at least chop and screw them and then give me the remnants. It's a beautiful circle. It's a virtuous circle. Sign up for your wood chip delivery at chipdrop.com.

Arborist, if you're out there, sign up at chipdrop.com and start saving your business all kinds of money. Go check it out now. Trav, we have been so busy over here at our house lately, but we still wanna eat real food sometimes. We can't live in a nugget-based home. Oh, I thought you meant like a hook scenario where you were imagining like bowls

of different colored goop. No, just like, you know, stuff that tastes like someone actually cared when they prepared it and they put love into it, you know what I mean? Yeah. Factor has made that a lot easier to keep up with. They have these really delicious meals that can be ready in two minutes with no prep.

Two minutes? Yeah, two minutes, no prep. And they got a bunch of different ones to choose from. Okay, just this week, roasted garlic chicken with green beans and sour cream and onion mashed potatoes. Yes, thank you. Cilantro chicken with some black beans and spicy corn. It's just delicious.

Yeah, I'll take that. It's delicious. Two minutes you could be eating that. You don't have to rely on fast food or whatever. I can't imagine those just as you describe them. I'm imagining them. Oh, they just appeared in bowls before me. Travis.

I imagine them so good, I'm having a food fight. Like in Hook. They got breakfast, they got dessert, they make your entire day delicious with Factor. Head to factormeals.com slash brother50 and use code BROTHER50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. That's code BROTHER50 at factormeals.com slash brother50

to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active. Factor Meals, their meals taste bang-a-rang. That's what it says right here. Whoa, it's weird. It says, yeah, their tagline is their meals taste bang-a-rang. That's so weird, because it doesn't make any fucking sense.

I know. It's such a wild thing to say. Hello, Podcast Recommendation Service. Hello there young man. I'm looking for a new podcast to listen to. Something amusing perhaps. Oh, what about Beef and Dairy Network? Something surreal and satirical. Well, I would suggest Beef and Dairy Network. Ideally it would be a spoof industry podcast for the beef and dairy industries.

Yes, Beef and Dairy Network. Maybe it would have brilliant guests such as Josie Long, Heather Ann Campbell, Nick Offerman and the actor Ted Danson. Beef and dairy network. I don't know, I think I'm going to stick to Joe Rogan. The Beef and Dairy Network podcast is a multi-award winning comedy podcast and you can find it at maximumfun.org or wherever you get your podcasts. Find it at maximumfun.org or wherever you get your podcasts. Somewhere in an alternate universe where Hollywood is smarter.

And the Emmy nominees for outstanding comedy series are Jet Pakula, Airport Marriott, Threeple, Dear America We've Seen You Naked, and Allah in the Family. In our stupid universe, you can't see any of these shows, but you can listen to them on Dead Pilot Society. The podcast that brings you hilarious comedy pilots that the networks and streamers bought but never made. Journey to the alternate television universe of Dead Pilot Society on MaximumFun.org. Would you guys like another question? Sure. I frequently play basketball at a public park in Florida. The day I didn't show up, Shaq showed up.

It's pronounced Flow-rida. Flow-rida. It's pronounced Flow-ridada. Flo-Ryda. It's pronounced Flo-Ryda. You wanna try it again? I frequently play basketball at a public park in Flo-Ryda. The day that I didn't show up, Shaq showed, fuck! Ha ha ha! Shaq showed up and was taking pictures.

Did you just call his, did you call that man Shaquille? Shack showed up and was taking pictures. That's what he says, that's what Shaq says whenever somebody is committed a crime and he's figured it out, he's like, Shaquille's. Shaquille's. Shaquille's. Yeah, when you're in France, they call,

he's called Shaquille. That's when you're in line to meet him. If you're in line, you gotta get in the Shaquille. I was just pronouncing it because I just did your flow ride a thing for you. I would like to meet Shaq. How do I make sure I don't miss Shaq again? That's from Shaquille Ordeal in Gainesville. Incredibly strong. Yeah.

Shaq is? Yeah, man, I imagine. He's a large fan. There's additional info that Shaq is? Yeah, man, I imagine. He's a large fan. There's additional info that Shaq's daughter plays basketball at the University of Florida. So this person suspects there will be more Shaq

in the future, potentially. More Shaq-ability. I really appreciate that additional info. More Shaq-ability. Yeah. I don't actually know where Shaq is based, and the idea that Shaq could appear anytime, anywhere I am is, I don't know if off-putting

is the word I would use, intimidating? It would be a constant consideration of mine, I feel like. Here's the thing about Shaquille O'Neal that I think you, maybe people don't think about enough. I've seen him stand next to other basketball men, and he's way bigger than them. Basketball men are big, right? Bigger than me.

So I have to imagine- Right, 100%. Were I in the presence of Shaquille O'Neal, it is the closest I would get to the thing I have often dreamed of when having to care for my children of having a much larger adult that then cares for me in turn, right? And I think that I would instantly feel

a certain amount of safety, a paternal love for Mr. Shack, and that might be the weirdest part of it all. Yeah, they already wanna meet Shaq, Trev. Like that's settled. Like you don't have to hype up meeting Shaq more. They definitely- No, I'm saying that because I know that about myself,

I don't know that I wanna meet Shaq. I Googled, where's Shaq? I don't like that you could do that. Yeah, I mean, I don't have a feed of his, I assume, sizable private jet. Okay, well, I guess I am glad that you had to do that and you didn't have that information at your fingertips, I guess.

This is crazy. He has more than one house. But I know he's in- What? What? You're telling me pro basketball player Shaquille O'Neal has more than one house? Famous, famous spokesman for a thousand things?

Basketball commentator, incredibly well known celebrity. No, we get it. No, we get it. He's famous and successful, but like, I know he's big. Why do you, it's, you have one body, you have one body, you know what I mean? But he has a lot of stuff. One's in Dallas and one is in Vegas.

He's got all his successories. I know you need to keep all your successories somewhere, but like Orlando, Vegas, Dallas, these cities are not close to each other. So like, make up your mind. Well, he's tall, he strides, Griffin. He can move across the country at rapid speeds. That's awesome.

The thing is, watching basketball makes him very sleepy. So he's trying to build a house in every place where they play basketball. So that time, anytime he watches basketball, I'm getting tired. Then he can just go straight home, go to sleep. There needs to be a series of towers in Gainesville, Florida that when Shaq is sighted at this basketball court,

you light one ablaze, and then the watchman at the next tower sees it. And then they can start Shaq-ing him wherever he happens to go. Well, I don't need a live update. I was imagining that this is like, Shaq has appeared at this basketball court, and so your buddies send up the fires of Gondor,

and then it's time to fucking get there. And I bet it gets so exciting when you see him like sparking, you know, the spark to light, and you're like, oh, it's heating up, and then it sets blaze, and like, he's on fire, and then like you know that it's time to slam. Yeah. He came up with that. The first time Shaq dunked in the NBA, he yelled all that shit, He's on fire! And then like you know that it's time to slam. He came up with that.

The first time Shaq dunked in the NBA, he yelled all that shit, and that's where it all gets to. A lot of people think it was an accident, but it was actually a Shaq accident. I think you need to tell- Hey Griffin, it was a Shaq accident. Justin, I heard it. You guys already missed that they were Shaquing him

with the towers. I said they were Shaquing him wherever he went. I missed both of those. I'm so sorry. They were buttery smooth. I think that you need to start telling people in your life, just so you know. That you love them.

I love you, but. Cause you never know. Never know. I love you. Good point Griffin. But. Yeah, Griffin that was beautiful. It's a weird moment to bring it up, but you're right. Yeah, that you never know with a buzz. Let other people in your life know I love you, good point Griffin. Yeah, Griffin that was beautiful. It's a weird moment to bring it up, but you're right. Yeah, that you never know with a buzz.

Let a people in your life know I love you, but. Say it, say it, say it loud. But. You know that that's Tommy's ringtone for when his dad calls? And I love that, because that does help you to remember to be nice to your dad when he calls. I think I'm at a point where I need to do that.

But, I love you so much. But, if I get a text from my friend Dougie at the park, that shack is there, I'm stopping whatever we're doing together, no matter how critical or important it is, I will stop that, I will call the fastest car service that can get to me, and I'm going to that park to meet Shaq. Like and I'm going to that park to meet Shaq. Like, I'm going to that park to meet Shaq. The best thing is an emergency service text from your friend saying Shaq here go.

And then you look at your- Drop a pen. You look at your significant other or your surgeon and you say, stitch me up, it's Shaq time. And they'll know what that means. I am picturing now like the person running in with like the smock still on halfway through a haircut. Like, hey, whoa, Shaq's here.

I was just in the neighborhood. She's showing up to ball and. Cool. Give me a minute. Let's play, yeah, let's play some basketball, Mr. Shaq. Oh yeah, these are the dramas. Don't worry about it, that's how I ball, son. It's a cape, the backwards cape.

I'm kind of a basketball superhero. Don't worry about it. You want to ball with me? All right, Shaq. I didn't say that. I bet Shaq never plays at the same, like just park court twice. I think he guarantees maybe one,

I think maybe once Shack will show up to your public park basketball court and will bless it like a new ship, setting sail for the first time, and then never, he can't come back there. It's wild to me that he still likes playing basketball without like just non-professional, that it's just like, I don't know how old Mr. O'Neil is,

but he's played- 59 years old. He's played so much basketball in his time that after a while you think that like, even if it was a thing you loved very, very much, you played so much basketball that eventually you'd be like, I think that's enough basketball for one lifetime. Yeah, but it's also very fun to play, you know? Yeah. I guess if you were good at it and tall,

I could see where you would enjoy it. Do you guys ever shoot? Maybe that's the difference is I'm coming in from my point of view, where I'm of a perhaps average height and below average talent. Right, sure. So for me, basketball is a slog, an unpleasant experience. I don't never think you get truly shackle-mated

to the feeling of dominating people like that. You know what I mean? I think that that's always gonna give you a thrill. I also think if Shaq didn't like playing basketball, he would've done something about it before now. Canceled basketball? No. You wanna put a stop to basketball? I'm taking it with me. I'm taking all the about it before now. Canceled basketball? No. You wanna put a stop to basketball?

I'm taking it with me. I'm taking all the basketballs with me. I'm not saying that Shaq hates basketball so much he would try to delete the sport from the public consciousness, just that he might have cut his career a little bit shorter because he would be like, I actually don't, this is weird, I don't like this this much.

I don't like it. I'd love to know what other dreams Mr. O'Neil had. In an alternate universe. Actor, did it, check. I don't like it. I'd love to know what other dreams Mr. O'Neil had. In an alternate universe. Actor, did it, check. Shakhtar, please. Sorry, man, I keep stepping on your guys kick ass Shakhtar. Shakportmintos. Shakhtar.

This is great. There's so many S tier ones. It goes so, if I say he's a Shakhtar, you know exactly what I import Manto. He's a shactor, you know exactly what I import Manto. He's a tractor. She thinks my shack too sexy. Now I would like to see a shack that dominated other fields is all I'm saying.

Has Mr. Shack written a novel yet? There's so much we don't know about Shack that I'm actually growing increasingly uncomfortable talking about Shack and stuff. Can we talk about something else then? Yeah. Dun dun dun dun dun. All right.

Dun dun dun dun dun. Yeah. Dun dun dun dun dun. I want a munch. Squad. I want to munch. Squad. Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba.

Welcome to Munch Squad, it's a podcast with them, a podcast profiling the latest in racing and brand eating. Munch Squad. Squad. Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. Welcome to Munch Squad's podcast with them, the podcast profiling the latest in Grayson Brand eating. Welcome to a quick Dunkin' update for the summer. They've got some things that are very exciting, some things that are not very exciting, and I'm not gonna tell you about those. I will say that there is a hot honey-kissed sandwich

that sounds really delightful. There is a s'mores. Hot in which hot. Mike's hot honey. This is the trend now. This is where everyone is at. Hot honey. Hot honey.

We love this right now. I like hot honey. Maybe not here though, maybe. No, but I will take it on anything. That is the trend. We got hot honey. Can I use this platform for a second to say I love hot honey? Don't zhuzh up. Don't make hot ketchup. Don't do this. I like hot ketchup

I like hot honey. We're gonna get hot honey snack and bacon That's marking Duncan's first new seasoned bacon flavor since 2019. So thank God That's I still think snack and bacon is one of the greatest accomplishments that the world has given us. This idea, you like bacon, it's okay to snack on now. Yeah, here's some for the road. Take it from us over here at Donkey Dugs. You can snack on bacon, no problem. This is what, this is the bit though

that I really wanna drill down onto, okay? This is part of like that I really want to drill down onto. Okay. This is part of like a lineup for the summer. And then it talks about this. A whirlwind of flavor, tornado twist, sparked energy. In tune with stormy summer blockbusters, Duncan debuted the Tornado Twist Sparked Energy Drink, a thrilling taste that's worth chasing. This new way to enjoy sparked energy blends,

berry burst with peach sunshine flavors, delivering a refreshing burst of raspberry, strawberry, peach and lychee flavors for a kick of caffeine and vitamins. Country music fans may have caught a glimpse of the new tornado twist in the recent music video, Ain't No Love in Oklahoma from Twisters, the album, performed by Luke Combs.

Okay. I have a question. Wait, I have my hand raised. Yeah, go ahead. Do you guys see what's happened? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have my hand raised. Please, Travis.

So, it's not in partnership with Twisters though, right? No. It's not, as far as I can tell, it's not. Now wait, now I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna communicate, complicate this a little bit. I'm gonna share with you guys the tab where I have the video for this scene stealing appearance.

The only mention. Of the Toyota Twist. The only mention of Twister is abstracted out from it appeared in a video for the thing. Okay. Okay, here we go. Okay, you ready? Not gonna play the music because I don't wanna get copy struck

and I probably wouldn't like it though. So there's a man in the middle of a tornado and there's one cowboy drinking it. Oh, is that it? That's it. Oh, okay. Okay, so I'll tell you exactly. And then it's like on the table.

There's like Duncan on the table. I'll tell you exactly what's happened, Justin. What has, guys, if you could tell me what's happened, because it's definitely intentional product placement. I'll tell you exactly what's happened. In the music video, it is product placed. There was a bigger brand deal here. That the development of this tornado drink was there,

because there's a Dunkin' Bag clearly in that shot, right? And this is the Twisters album official video. So this was in the works, right? Something fell through. Something fell through. Something fell through. Okay. And they played it down. So they were saying that like, listen,

we can't take the Duncan, I know the deal fell through. Okay, everybody agrees. We can't take the Duncan out of the music video. It's a key shot. Correct. We have to have it. We have to have it. And Duncan's like, well, we actually already made the shit to make these tornado drinks.

And we're gonna call them tornado twists. And when you drink it, you're gonna's like, well, we actually already made the shit to make these tornado drinks, and we're gonna call them tornado twists. And when you drink it, you're gonna be like, fuck, that tastes like a tornado, so we can't call it anything else. Because there's no other scenario that makes sense to me why they would say, like, in tune with summer blockbusters. You mean all the, we're not gonna mention the one. The writing of tornado,

all the tornado summer blockbusters. We're still gonna mention the one. The writing of Tornado, all the Tornado summer blockbusters. We're still bringing all the Tornado pictures. Could they not refer to Twisters as the movie that contains the Luke Bryan song from the Twisters soundtrack? Twisters of Twisters soundtrack fame. It is in the music video for a song, first of all, thank God that this is still happening in the year of our Lord, 2024,

that there are still unhinged music videos based around summer blockbusters. Thank you. I thought that died in the nineties. I'm thrilled. It's wild that Duncan would acknowledge this. Like, I mean, it is in the music video guys. We should at least tell people it's in the music video, but are so spitefully not mentioning the movie, Twisters? Or legally not mentioning it.

Or legally not able to? I wanna be a fly on the wall at Duncan HQ, where they're like, can we mention that it's in the music video for the song from Twisters? It is right there! This press release took 19 days and a half, in the music video for the song from Twisters. It is right there. This press release took 19 days and six lawyers to write to figure out like what can we possibly say.

We can't not mention Twisters, but we mustn't mention Twisters. Y'all, I'm gonna have to email them. I'm gonna have to reach out. I'm gonna have to reach out. I'm gonna have to ask. I think they'll ignore it, but I think I'm gonna have to ask if this is just mere happenstance.

If this is just mere coincidence. Now, there is another possibility, Justin, that's far, that's, I don't know, stranger, that they made this music video and the shot of the Duncan was completely unintentional. And then the music video came out and Duncan said, we got to move on this now. And like, they saw that thing and they're like, we're making a tornado drink. We're talking about the music video.

That was great. The one shot though, of a singular cowboy center of screen enjoying the biggest Duncan drink I've ever seen andin' drink I've ever seen and the pinkest I've ever seen anyone drink. I think that's an intentional hero shot. It has to be. That the shot is so long, it makes you think that it's a movie about this drink.

There's also Dunkin' Bags on the table. Yeah, there's this plan. So it has to be a fallen through deal. It has to be. Please get to the bottom of this, Justin. I will do my best. No one will tell me. Give me pictures of Spider-Man. Hey, listen. Drinking this pink big drink.

Thank you so much for listening to our podcast. We hope you've enjoyed yourself because we really enjoy spending this time with you. You know the stuff at the beginning, that's just a way to do an introduction. We always have fun doing the show. That's the secret or we wouldn't do it. That's a trick.

If we really are too tired, you know what we do? We we wouldn't do it. That's the trick. If we really are too tired, you know what we do? We just don't do it. Just don't do it. Just don't do it. Just don't do it. Yeah. Don't do it. We do it a different time.

We just don't do it then. It's like a little break to ourselves then and kind of a fuck you to ourselves later. It's classic adult stuff. Classic adult stuff. I'm so excited because it's a new month and we got all new stuff to announce. This month, the Suffering Game, Adventure Zone,

the Suffering Game, the latest Adventure Zone graphic novel comes out July 16th. This is just a beautiful object to look at. It brings me such joy just having it around my house. It's like, it's incredible. It's beautiful. We are partnering with four independent bookstores to offer signed book plates.

Go to bit.ly slash suffering games signed for information on our partner stores and purchase links. You can submit your pre-order receipt at theadventureszonecomic.com to receive a free acrylic key chain of Trace Horny Boys while supplies last. We got some shows coming up.

What? Yeah, July 18th and 19th we're gonna be in Detroit doing the Bim Bam and Taz. July 20th we're gonna be in Cleveland. We got- Have we healed, we healed Detroit already. We don't have to talk about Star Wars anymore. We're all fine. We don't have to talk about Star Wars.

We're all fine. Now we only have to talk about Star Wars if we want to. Yeah, absolutely. I did. We got more coming up, shows in Portland, Orlando, Atlanta, Denver, Phoenix, Indianapolis, Milwaukee. Go to bit.ly slash McElroy Tours for tickets and more information.

And we've got new merch, new month, new merch. You can get an amazing fungalore poster designed by Cat Turvo. It's a fine fungalore poster. It's a puzzle, a game, but it looks fucking great. And I'm gonna give it to you. I think I read it all for one price. Are we charging people extra?

Cause it's both fun and good look. And good look. Yeah. We've also got a fun galore standee designed by Kate May. And if you've been listening to Adventure Zone versus Dracula, a Yon Cuck sticker designed by Pepper Raccoon and 10% of all proceeds this month go to the Palestine Children's Elite Fund.

So go check all those out at macronmerch.com. Hey, do y'all wanna, oh, thanks to Montane. Do y'all wanna thanks to Montane? Yeah, I would love to thanks to Montane. Cool, thanks Montane for the use of our theme song, My Life is Better with You. It is a chart-chopping ass- Clapping club banger.

Okay. What? Ass slapping is what I said. Ass slapping clubbing. Okay. Yeah, there's a wish I'd like to elevate if you guys would give me a little soundbalf background. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do.

I wish the song Born in the USA was maybe 40 seconds shorter. My name is Justin McElroy. I'm Travis McElroy. I'm Griffin McElroy. It's been my brother, my brother, me. Kiss your dad, square lips. My life is better with you Yes it's true It's better, it's better with two My life

Ah It's better with you