My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 733: Congratulations on Your Powerful Trunk
Episode Date: October 14, 2024This one is for the real nerds out there, and we mean MUSCLE NERDS! Show off those gams! Lift those Chipotle burritos and get swole! Make your eyes so strong you can see John Cena! Suggested talking ...points: Pentagram of Chipotles, Ask Me About My Tea Poster, Polar Pizza Before the Resurrection, Justin McElroy Bad News for Bots Native Women Lead: https://www.nativewomenlead.org/
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The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed.
Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it.
Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening.
What's up, you cool baby? One, two, three, four! It's the start of something beautiful
A small acquaintance has blossomed
It's ripened into a precious friendship
I could've never seen what was coming for me
Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach
My life, it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like it feels like It's better, it's better with two. My life, ah, it's better with you.
Hello everybody and welcome to My Brother, My Brother,
me and advice show for the Bajonera.
I'm your oldest brother Justin Macaray
and I have to remind myself that every single episode
is another chance to shine.
What's up Trav Nation?
I'm your middle-ist brother, Travis Big Dog, Woof Woof, Maceroi.
I appreciate the honesty of,
you have to remind yourself to do a good show.
Not to do a good show, Griffin.
What he said was that it's his chance to shine,
which would imply that perhaps up till now.
You and I are gonna take a back seat on this one.
I'm Griffin Maceroroy, the baby brother.
When you crack open your email
and you see 733 staring at you in that subject line,
part of you feels like,
certainly that's enough of them.
Right, certainly.
Surely I've shown enough.
Certainly that's enough of them.
You get it.
Like how many good flights does the pilot have to do
before you're like, he's got it, he's good.
He can fudge this one a little bit.
But can I remember?
Every one of these is a work of art.
Like every one of these is a special,
individual work of art.
That's true.
That's true, to change hearts and minds.
I think we're also in a bit of an unexciting
numerical groove.
It is hard.
733, who gives a shit, man?
Can you guys?
737, we can do a little plane thing.
Oh, it'll be like, Sully, we love a prompt for a joke.
Like, we can do, we love that shit.
Do some words you're gonna eat
right through the ink cartridge of that pen.
I'm real worried.
Yeah, don't eat that pen.
I've been there.
But speaking of eating, if you guys are hungry,
I've got a big announcement.
That's not a, the connective tissue of that is there.
It all gets quite loose, it's stringy.
Give me a second, because you know
how it influences these days, and this is so topical.
Everybody's doing meal deals with a thing
I've decided to partner with.
Happy Fourth of July, by the way, everybody.
That is the date that we recorded this,
obviously talking about this.
I've decided to partner with Chipotle.
Okay.
To do a meal deal with Travis.
It is currently an unofficial partnership.
Is this like when you are like a cyberpunk hero, they give you a drink named after you
at the hacker bar?
Yeah, sort of like that.
My hope is that we'll kinda do a grassroots partnership deal
where if enough people go in and ask for the Travis,
the whole label will start carrying it.
I am actually hugely, don't do that.
Hey, listener at home, don't do that.
You don't even know what the Travis is.
No, but I'm more talking about you are saying,
hey, do this thing that'll embarrass you
and that'll bring me some sick satisfaction.
They probably won't know what the Travis is.
It won't bring me any satisfaction.
Yeah, so again, like we're agreeing then,
don't do this if you're listening.
What you're about to hear is pure jokes, not an order.
You're gonna go in and you're gonna say,
give me the Travis, they're gonna say, what's that?
Don't actually do that.
And you're gonna say, grab an extra,
grab like a large cup, right, that you would put a drink in.
Fill it with guacamole, light ice.
And that's the Travis.
Okay.
Why is that the Travis?
I guess let's start, like, Juice,
how many questions do you have off the top of your head?
Cause I've got like nine.
Why, why this?
Why do you like this?
Why this?
Number one, why this?
Juice and I are agreed, top priority.
Why do this?
Oh, because I don't like a lot of ice in my guacamole.
Okay, so that avoids that,
sidesteps the question in sort of a funny way.
What are you doing with all that guac?
You just chuzzle that down?
Well, I mean, it's good if you need it.
You put a hung and you put some cling film over the top
and then you got guacamole for a while.
It's not a, sorry.
No, you're mistaken and confused.
Chipotle is not a Tex-Mex grocery store
where you go to- Stock up.
Stock up your supply of guacamole.
Well, that's why it's the Travis,
because I'm kind of an out of the box thinker
and not a lot of people stock up on their supplies
at Chipotle and I would if I ever went there.
You've never been to Chipotle?
I don't think so.
Wait, not for jokes.
Not for jokes.
I am actually deeply curious if we could step out of,
Travis, can I get you to break cavefake for just a moment
and step out of jokes?
The thing I think is most interesting,
like I'm already flashing forward to telling my wife like,
honey, do you know Travis has never been in a Chipotle?
I just don't think I have.
Travis, step outside.
Travis, please, the kayfabe, I'm gonna take it,
shoop, and put it down on the ground for a minute.
We're gonna put that on pause.
Out of the room.
Out of the room, no jokes, only honesty, real, uncut, Trav.
Please, I'm asking you as your brother
to give me a real thing here.
Have you eaten a Chipotle?
Don't say I think I have.
I need a, you would know whether or not
you've done this or not.
Here's what I'll say.
I can picture the interior of a Chipotle.
Okay.
I don't remember eating there.
So if I have, it's been like once in my entire life.
Yeah, no, I mean, if you can-
Tell me if you've eaten that Chipotle or not!
If you've envisioned the front-
The memory is so malleable, it's a problem.
It has been worked.
It's like a cold stone creamery,
but hot and with rice and beans.
Yeah, no, no, like I said, I understand the concept,
and I can picture it.
Let me tell you this.
You get a delivery bag of Chipotle
and you get out the bowl that you ordered.
What's that look like?
What's that look like, Trav?
What's your Chipotle order?
Well, or what is the thing physically actually look like?
Yeah, what are you eating in your mind's eye?
Don't say a big cup of ice and guacamole.
The bit's on the fucking ground still.
We put the bit in the corner.
We might go back and pick up the bit, we may not.
I haven't decided yet.
It's kind of like a cardboard-y kind of bowl and there's like rice in it and yes other fixings and stuff
Yeah, what and how do they cover it on top of it? I?
Mean like a burrito. I didn't ask you to describe it for Pictionary
I want you to just tell me where you order there, but I'm I'm mostly I'm conjuring. What's your favorite protein?
What's your favorite Chipotle protein?
I-
I don't think this motherfucker's eaten a Chipotle juice! I think he's lived a Chipotle free life!
I don't think you've-
Have you had Chipotle?
Why are you guys treating me like a gotcha when I started the entire segment saying,
I don't think I've ever eaten there?
And now you guys are like quizzing me as I'm like, I don't know man man. And you're like, ha, I don't think you've eaten a Chipotle.
We travel a lot, Travis.
And the thing about a Chipotle is that if you're ever out
on the road traveling and you're hungry,
you're hungry, you start to get a grumble in your tummy,
you can reach in your pocket and take out your keys.
Chipotle is close enough for you to throw your keys at it
and hit it.
So you can go, so that's what's like,
just like law of large numbers, the number of Chipotles you've seen
and decided not to eat at is so large.
I have a way of settling this, Travis.
Okay.
Think about your favorite Chipotle.
Okay, I-
Okay, think about your number one favorite Chipotle.
I'm not even sure what we're settling anymore.
Remember the first time you went there?
To your favorite Chipotle. Yeah.
Are you visualizing your favorite Chipotle?
Think about the first time you went there.
I can't, I don't know where Chipotle is in this neck.
Scroll down your delivery app of choice at your orders and scroll down and look.
Yeah.
See how close Travis is.
100% I don't have any delivery orders from Chipotle in my phone.
Okay.
It's just like, I'm not, can I just say this,
listener at home, if you're getting confused
or ready for this bit to end, I understand.
It's truly, this is just interesting now to me and Justin
and maybe only us.
Yeah, we're not trying to do any jokes right now.
I don't even love Chipotle.
I don't eat at Chipotle anymore
because there's a lot of really great restaurants in my neighborhood now. I don't go love Chipotle. I don't eat at Chipotle anymore because there's a lot of really great restaurants
in my neighborhood now.
I don't go there for that,
but it's crazy to have never had Chipotle.
So I would say statistically in my 40 years,
because I'm not gonna sit here and be like,
maybe a paparazzo has like a single picture
of me leaving Chipotle.
I don't wanna get gotcha'd.
I'm saying statistically,
I have been to Chipotle enough in my 40 years
as to say I don't think I've ever been there statistically.
Right? Maybe once.
But I don't know that.
No, Travis, no, Travis, no.
This is where it keeps breaking down for me.
Okay, let's, I...
I can't show you a diagram because it would dox Travis.
Thank you.
But there's a basically- This would be a wild thing to dox him.
A wild way to get him.
Wild way to go.
But basically there is a pentagram of Chipotle's
surrounding him.
If you were to connect the dots
between the Chipotle surrounding Travis,
it would make a pentagram.
And I'm gonna send it in slack.
Within four miles?
You know what I'm fucking with?
Travis' house is built on a Chipotle lay line.
Maybe that's it.
If you just follow the ray,
then you will eventually arrive.
And you can either-
Like, is there one within four miles of me?
Oh yeah, 3.4 miles, 3.2?
So Griff, as you can see there-
Oh my God, there's a bunch.
There's like a four mile radius.
So many Chipotles.
Oh wow, but it is arranged in a perfect constellation.
I mean, that's Travis, let me say, I kinda get it now.
I kinda get it now.
You're not getting a lot of Chipotle foot traffic
of your own feet.
So I do understand that.
It looks like they're closing in on you
from this diagram.
It does, it looks like a family of velociraptors
is executing the pincer. Here's here is what I would just love,
because we didn't have a lot of pre-planned content
for this episode.
No.
Trav, it's coming up on lunchtime.
What would you think about putting in an order
to get you some Chipotle that you can enjoy
for the first time live in our program?
I think that that would make for some horrible audio.
There's nothing they sell there
that doesn't mush up terribly.
It's all mush.
It's all mush.
Sometimes they wrap up the mush
so you can eat it on the go,
but I like to rock with a bowl of mush.
I don't wanna have to just put in an order
and guess at what you like, Travis.
No, thank you.
I also like to, I do bowl because I like to be able to see the mush also,
which is important.
Let's talk about Travis's first Chipotle order, okay?
Yeah, do the read order bowl, we start there.
Well, I don't even know if he has the app open.
Hey Trav, pull up the Chipotle app on your phone.
What, I don't have the app.
C-H-I in the search bar, and then it'll auto fill,
and it'll show up on your phone.
Yeah, sometimes you have to make a lead check.
It seems like a lot of work.
If I'm on it, and I'm not saying the ordering process,
I'm saying I'm looking at pictures.
Yeah.
Of like their dishes.
Yeah. Yeah.
It seems like a lot of work to eat them.
Is it triggering anything within you?
No.
I don't like eating things that fall apart
while I'm eating them.
Okay, I understand that very much.
Bowl is a good way to go.
Okay.
So you're thinking about a bowl.
I love that.
A base-
I'm not thinking about a bowl.
You guys are like mentalist- We're thinking bowls
for this one.
Getting a bowl into my head.
Juice and I are thinking for Travis a bowl.
I feel like I'm having a bespoke, like I'm at a tailor.
And you guys are having a series of questions.
I'm just responding to you.
You said you don't like when things fall apart.
We have a limited set of options
for people like yourself, okay?
It's gotta all be caught by something, man.
Travis, the other options is salad.
I know you're not going there, man.
You're gonna get the bowl.
Bowl or burrito, but we have burrito bowls,
we have salads, we just don't know.
Gotta go bowl.
Produce.
No, because I'm worried if we go too far down this,
I'm gonna have to eat this thing.
It's pretty good.
It's not hook.
This doesn't work that way, Travis.
Like, if we talk about the food all day,
it's not just gonna show up at your house.
Well, they have smoked brisket.
Oh, it's plus five dollars, though. Plus five they have smoked brisket. Oh, it's plus five dollars though,
plus five dollars for smoked brisket.
Now you're talking.
So the burrito bowl is like,
is just like if you dumped it all out.
And then the salad is just the burrito bowl
with some shredded lettuce in there,
don't let it fool you.
Yeah, don't be fooled.
You can actually turn a burrito bowl into a salad
by saying, let me get some extra romaine lettuce in there.
Life hack.
Now protein, Trav, what are you thinking protein wise?
What would be your go-to?
He balked at the brisket,
so I know that some of the premium options,
the premium options he's not gonna go for.
It's just $5 is, I mean.
No, that's a huge upcharge, that's crazy.
Carnitas, perhaps.
Great.
Carnitas are a great choice, Trav.
Tender, juicy, you're gonna love them.
That's a great, I'll tell you what I love
about carnitas, Trav, and I think it represents
a lot of wisdom on your part, and perhaps even
some systemic knowledge of chipotle you probably possess
because you've eaten there before,
is carnitas is a beginner, I think,
a great beginner option. It's not as assertive or spicy as a barbecue. probably possess because you've eaten there before, is carnitas is a beginner, I think,
and a great beginner option.
It's not as assertive or spicy as a barbacoa.
It's not traditional and boring like a chicken.
Oh, no, no, I will say this.
Now, the chicken at Chipotle, though,
does pack enough heat to put some toddlers off.
Yeah, that's true, actually.
Carnitas are a nice mild option.
There's the best spice to the chicken there. I just wanna warn you. Great texture. If you never eat a Chipotle, that's true actually. Carnitas are a nice mild option. There's a bit of spice to the chicken there.
I just wanna warm it.
Great texture.
Every image poll I you would know.
Great texture, really mushy.
Really, really mushy meat.
The perfect amount of mush,
would you just say totally? Sweet, I don't like this.
No, no, no, but it's good when you get it all together
in one bite. No, I'm not saying
you're used to the word mushy.
I'm saying that the experience I'm having currently,
and this moment, occupying the body that I have right now,
as you two talk to me, I'm not enjoying it.
I'm not enjoying it very much.
Let's move on.
Let's move on then.
But now I am hungry.
No, let's move on.
It's a very fair, a very fair point.
I think it was just too much.
No, it was fair.
Too much attention on, that makes perfect sense to me.
It got too real.
Well, and there's also, it's hard to contribute
when you've only been to Chipotle a handful of times.
Yeah, most.
A quantum physics number of times.
Five to six times.
Oh, a Schrodinger's amount of times.
Which kind of their salsa is,
just to put a bow on this, do you prefer?
In general, in life, I like a verde.
Do they have any kind of verde?
They do. No, I'm fucking here.
Do they?
This is a green verde. Yeah, I guess so.
It's more of a darkish, darkish brownish.
I have long worked a very physically demanding job
and have recently taken up rock climbing.
Between all the heavy lifting at work
and hitting the climbing gym several times a week,
I have a lot of upper body strength and extremely well-defined arms.
It's gotten to the point where my brothers Travis and Griffin-
Whoa, wait!
Wait, huh?
No, sorry.
It's gotten to the point where co-workers in new acquaintances regularly say things
like, wow, you are built, or you have really nice arms.
What is the appropriate response to this?
They're not being weird or creepy,
and I'm very proud of my physical strength.
As for muscular and trying to be modest in Manhattan,
see her.
My go-to. Is it so hard
to be so strong and built?
Oh man, poor you with your huge powerful strong body
My my go-to because this happens to me
Sorry Justin just fucking in response to my things just sort of uppercut in his microphone and now he's busting
I know what you were trying to do. I was going to make a crying expression with my hands.
But instead you punched your microphone like a real underprofessional.
I was rubbing, wiping tears out and then it occurred to me that that's not going to read
on the podcast.
It was a weird energy.
But it occurred to me as I was hitting the microphone so I just bailed on the action.
So it looked like I was just hitting the microphone, so I just bailed on the action. Yeah, it's cool. So it looked like I was just hitting the microphone
and then stopping.
I didn't even like the energy of the bit I did,
and I was like, hopefully we'll just move on from that,
but Justin really hung a lantern on it
with that uppercut.
Travis, I apologize for interrupting.
No, no, no, it's fine.
This happens to me all the time.
I've got powerful fish lifters.
You just hit them with a, huh, these old things?
That's great. I love that.
That's good. I am really torn because I've been telling my kids that we just don't comment on people's bodies ever.
That's been kind of the hard line that we have drawn at our house is just see everybody's kind of a shapeless spirit.
our house is just see everybody's kind of a shapeless spirit.
This is just live. Right.
I, I feel like I don't necessarily, I feel like nobody should be talking
about anybody's bodies at all.
Just the period.
But the question isn't about them complimenting other people's bodies.
Trust me.
No, no, no, no.
But other people hear this too.
Right.
And so I'm, I just wanted to point out that a much better thing might be in your day-to-day life to just like not,
just be like, hate choice, anything really.
I'll tell you what I don't like about
complimenting only muscles is like,
if someone is like wiry or stocky in like a cool way,
that one doesn't get much sort of commentary
because you can't walk up to somebody and be like,
hey, you're stocky in a way I like.
I think that's a wild sort of-
You look difficult to knock over.
Yeah, what a sturdy individual you are.
Wow.
See?
Great trunk.
Powerful.
Don't tell us how they were.
Powerful trunk.
Powerful trunk.
Congratulations on your powerful trunk!
Look at this immovable oak over here, this redwood.
Why do I have to solve the problems
of someone who is so physically strong, hm?
True.
Why do I have to solve your physically strong people
can be emotionally weak?
We just, just to clarify,
we are the mouse pulling the thorn out of the lion's paw.
We help this strong, like, muscly person
so that later, if bullies come to try to get us,
we can say, careful now, we have a strong friend.
Yeah, we helped them.
We helped them, kind of, a little bit.
That's why in, like like TV shows and movies,
you never see like, oh, here's the strong person
and here's like the nerd person
and they work together because one,
or you never see like the nerd be like,
I'll help you with your homework
and you help me with bullies.
And then the jock is like, I'm a straight A student
and I've got a scholarship to Harvard.
And then the nerd's like, oh shit,
I don't have anything to offer you anymore.
That never happens.
Yeah.
I think the bigger problem is not what you do
with your mouth and saying,
but what happens with the arms.
Oh yeah.
Because I'm thinking about if I'm carrying a baby
or something and people are like, wow, nice arms.
I'm immediately- They might be talking about the baby.
Maybe, but I'm immediately so aware
of what I'm doing with them, right?
I'm immediately like, I guess I should not flex
or flex more to show it off better.
That's a challenge they have posed for you.
Great arms.
Am I, should I show them the full,
like if they're like, oh, if you're interested in arms,
let me show you what their full is.
Let me show you all the different features they got.
I can show you.
Oh, a pair of arms.
They can do this.
When you're holding the baby, you're in the fucking zone.
Don't take me out of my zone, I'm in the zone.
I need total concentration on this.
That is true.
When I'm in my office.
But that's why I like these old things,
because there's enough of a humorous response
that you can get away with even flexing a little bit more,
and everyone's like, how playful, right?
And you say, oh, these old things?
And they're like, ah, what a bashful, playful response
while still showing off all the special features
that their arms possess.
I have shed pretty much all of my knee jerk dislike
or judgment of people with big strong bodies
because what I've learned is a lot of them
are just like, they're strong nerds.
Like they're nerds about getting,
watching physical 100, that's a hundred big nerds
that care only about muscle stuff and sports stuff,
but they're like nerds about it.
It's interesting.
And so to me, it could be they're trying to get you
into a conversation about like,
how do you do your shit?
I think that's interesting.
Cause you do it and you take it seriously
and you get strong cause of it.
That's neat.
That is neat.
Just don't be a jerk with your might.
That's the big problem that we at All-Haw have.
Responsibly.
They might also be looking for a not weird way
to ask you if you would like just pick them up
and carry them around for a while,
cause I would like that. I'm tired, I'm so tired.
I have to pick my kids up all the time
and there's no 12 foot like adult behind me
who then picks me up while I'm tired.
Yeah. That's all I want.
And once the boss starts doing it,
it's gonna be like, is the boss being passive aggressive?
Is the boss threatened by me?
Cause I'm like way huger than the boss is.
No, they just wanna be carried around.
Do you worry that people,
that you need to direct people to other muscles
that they should enjoy as long as they're around?
If you like these, wait till you see.
This is just what's on the schedule. Let me take you on a tour.
I'm gonna hike my pants.
I want you to see my quads.
I am gonna hike my pants way, way up.
Like, I need HR in the room while I do this.
It's just quads.
Well, that's, I mean, that's what would happen
if someone admired, like, you're playing Pokemon cards,
whatever, and they said, that's a great one, you bet.
Well, let me show you some of my rare cards, right?
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Why can't I do that with my muscles?
Let me show you muscles other people don't have
that I've developed.
I've collected all the muscles.
I mean, I'm really having a hard time
imagining being strong.
Do you wanna see my muscles, Joseph?
I'm really struggling for the bit.
I'm trying to come up with some jokes
that I might do if I was a strong person.
You have powerful legs.
And I'm really struggling to.
Let me tell you, man, sometimes you come up to me
when we're on tour and you give me a little back rub,
a little shoulder massage, and that shit is fearsome.
That shit is effective.
Yeah, that's true.
I guess I am very strong.
Thank you, Griffin.
And you're a shorts wearer
and I've enjoyed your quads and calves.
Absolutely sweet.
I mean, we all have pretty great gams.
It's a sort of-
My gams could be better.
I'm at arms, man.
I could have better gams.
I know that about myself.
I'm trying.
Hey, I know we're getting close to money zone time,
but before we do, I just wanna do a quick,
this could be a new segment on the show if we wanted to,
just a quick background check, which is to say like, let's sort of do a quick audit this could be a new segment on the show if we wanted to, just a quick background check,
which is to say like, let's sorta do a quick audit
of all of our backgrounds.
Obviously, mine's sort of very shelf forward
where I try to show off some of my favorite stuff.
And then Juice has the sort of like paneling behind him,
and he'll put up a few of his little 3D printed
little toys up there, and I think that's so cool.
And then Travis used to have more plants and fish in it,
and now I see there is one plant and a skeleton,
and then we also have, I believe that is a plushy Donkey Kong.
That is a plushy Donkey Kong.
I got that from-
A claw machine, I'm guessing.
While we were doing Donkey Kong Country.
And so I put him up there.
There's also a little statue thing
of Merle Magnus, Taco, and Angus behind me
and our, of course, YouTube play button
that we got for getting- Still sucks.
Still sucks that you just took that.
It's hidden behind plants.
Like he's not even in the plants.
I wouldn't even hide it.
I would put, I would honestly, Trav,
I would swap the positions of Donkey Kong
and the YouTube Play Award.
Do you want me to 3D print your frame
that just says Trav's is button?
But hide Donkey Kong,
because we don't even do him anymore.
Ah!
Oh no!
Trav's dropped his skeleton off the thing.
Yeah, the YouTube Play button,
give it a more featured position.
And then don't-
It's hard bragging,
I think it feels bad bragging about the silver, doesn't it?
I mean, it's kind of the worst one you could have.
It kind of puts an exact cap on your popularity level.
It's like, this is exactly how famous these guys are.
Well, we only just started doing YouTube stuff.
I feel great about it.
It's just a few years ago.
Our YouTube channel's like what, a decade old?
Travis, that's way better.
That's way better, man.
Now you look like a pro.
I feel like I'm showing off.
Travis, please.
Where does your light belong?
On the canals thing or under the bushel?
You're right.
Yeah, you're right.
Don't hide it under a bushel, oh no.
Put it on your show.
Have to be a pretty big bushel.
Put that YouTube silver word up
so that everyone in the house may enjoy it.
At my local coffee shop today,
I noticed wrestler John Cena dropped by.
I doubt it.
Wow.
Just calling our-
Hey, hey guys, have we ever done this before
when they asked the question and we're like,
you fucking liar.
I doubted that they saw him.
Okay, I mean, let's unpack this then.
I thought that, I don't follow wrestling,
but I thought there was something about you can't see him.
Oh gosh, okay, now I get it.
I'm so sorry.
No, I was out of my lane.
No, this was my failing and it's the way I have lapsed
as a wrestling fan, I forgot that that was his.
Blew it again.
You didn't blow it.
You did a kickass joke.
Me and Travis blew it on that one.
We didn't do a very good job.
So anyway, Saul John Cena asked a barista later
and was told he visits regularly.
Obviously the best thing to do
with this information is nothing,
which I will admit that you've already failed
by writing this email,
but moving on.
But this is the next degree closest to nothing.
This is next to nothing.
Yes.
And let him go about his day.
But if given the opportunity while he's around, brothers,
what might be the most impressive way to order
and drink a coffee or tea?
Oh, my friend.
I think that this is too short-sighted.
I don't think there's an impressive way
to order a drink or a tea or whatever.
That said, I do think there are impressive things
one could be doing in a coffee shop at a table
that would be noticed and appreciated by anyone,
let alone Jonathan Sina.
Yeah. Yeah.
Like playing chess against yourself, right?
Spinning the thing around, that's gonna get noticed.
That's gonna get noticed.
Finishing your novel and loudly announcing,
it's finished!
When you slam the laptop shut,
something like that would be appreciated.
Yeah, that's not gonna work.
I do think you would have to do
a pretty extreme version
of it, of like closing your laptop and be like,
hey everyone, I just got engaged.
Then John Cena might look at you and be like, great work.
I don't think anything less than a fresh engagement.
My wife's in labor.
Fucking John Cena will turn into-
Carry me to the hospital, John Cena.
Well, no, see, let's, let's talk about expectations.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
You will never be John Cena's friend.
Never ever.
Whoa.
Wow.
Never ever, ever, ever, ever.
You don't know that.
No, I know that.
I'll never be John Cena's friend.
Neither will Justin, neither will Travis.
It will never, ever, ever happen.
Never, ever, ever, ever. Oh my God. You guys haven't heard of manifesting. Come on the seat. No, I've got it written on my board
No, we'll never be John Cena's that's why I wouldn't care to see John Cena in green room
If there's no chance I'll ever be the person's friend. I think it's great to see a celebrity
Yes, Gracie and famous person cuz I will feel no pressure I see someone like, I bet we could get to be friends.
Then it's all out the window.
It's chaos.
It's pandemonium.
Sometimes I forget how polar opposite
we are in some regards.
That's cool though.
It takes a village to make a podcast.
Travis, I wanna hear how you would wear down John Cena.
No, no, no, I'm saying,
but the difference was when I see somebody
and I'm like, I could be friends with them, that feels good.
When I see a celebrity and I'm like,
that's so far out of my way, I suddenly panic.
No, but like Travis, I'm saying,
if I had to do this thing that this person is talking about,
and I was like, Arsene Lupin, and I needed guidance,
you were the person I would come to,
and I would be like, Travis,
help me plan this friendship heist.
And I'm asking you as the best of the biz
that I know what would be your strategy
to bring down by which we mean.
And then wait, just let me get on your other shoulder here
and say that I think that this bit could trend
towards levels of kind of hypnotism
or running some sort of con or other sort of things that might remove
John Cena's agency in some way.
And let me just get ahead of that,
let me just get ahead of that and say, don't do that.
Because people do not like that.
By doing this, by saying it out loud,
I am trademarking it and no listener is allowed to do it.
Okay.
But if you ever, if part of it is putting him in a big box.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Calling him Brocktoon.
I would never Brocktoon him, no. Okay, great.
I would, he gets in line a couple of people behind me,
right, and I would lean into the-
Tell me how you orchestrate that.
First of all, stop there.
Tell me how you orchestrate it so that John Cena
gets in line a couple of people behind you.
I'm saying if it happens, he comes in here often, right?
I see it, I'm in.
But in my head, you just rolled out the map
and you like, and like turn on the light above it
You're like you're assuming but here is his plan
Hopefully he will end up two customers behind me
I have orchestrated this and that's not how I operate my man. I'm in there. I see an opportunity
But you don't see this is what I'm saying, Travis, you don't see the opportunity
You got to the store before him and there's two people behind you and then John Cena.
That's crazy.
There's no fucking way.
Cashier, he comes in, I lean into the cashier, I say,
like his, you know, actually like 15 bucks,
I wouldn't pay for whatever he gets.
Yeah, I'm a big fan, don't make a big deal out of it.
Right? Right.
So his order is covered with whatever he orders, right?
Is this at a start?
So this is at just like a cafe, okay.
Yeah, in these circumstances, right?
And then if he decides to say something like,
oh man, I really appreciate it, thank you so much, right?
Because he's a regular,
I'm not taking this opportunity as like a one-time chance.
There will be more opportunities, yeah.
Now he at least has some kind of recognition of who I am.
Rome was not built in a day.
And now there's an opportunity to perhaps engage
in conversation the next time
or a shared interest is present.
But I think that that is also true of literally anyone.
Yeah, sure.
Outside of that, where you see someone reading a book
that you've read before, you say, I love that book.
That's a great choice, whatever, right?
Some kind of introduction, not going to change,
you're not gonna write books
about how great this introduction was.
But just a chance to start a conversation.
It is more high pressure though
than a conversation with a normal person,
because when you're talking to a normal person,
you're not running the risk of making such a big boner
that they go on their wrestling show that night
and they're like, this fucking jabroni tried to buy my drink
at Drink, Drink More.
No way.
His name was Travis McElroy.
Like, and then like you're done in that town.
Can you imagine though, hey Griffin, in that scenario.
That's a win for you.
John Cena gets up and like a fucking like SmackDown
or whatever and starts talking shit about me?
Are you kidding me?
I'm over the moon.
And then fuckin' Brock Lesnar comes out and is like,
I actually like Travis McElroy.
I thought graduation was good.
He's an acquired taste, but it's just fuckin'
it's not for everybody.
He's trying to fix it right.
Yeah, and he's, listen, I like him
and I get that he's not funny, but that's the humor!
Brock Lesnar with a fucking knife tattoo
and a fucking Trav Nation tattoo on his other peck.
I like that shit.
I got, oh, I think I got this cracked wide open, guys.
Oh, boy, okay.
You ready?
You're John Cena. Yeah.
You're John Cena and I'm me, all right?
Wait, which one of us? Both of us are John Cena? We would equal half of a John Cena. You're both John Cena and I'm me, all right? Both of us are John Cena?
We would equal half of a John Cena.
You're both John Cena and I'm me.
All right, okay, wait, let's fuse.
Ah, yeah!
Can you not make this about you guys?
Thank you. Oh, sure, sure, sure.
My apologies.
Yeah, it's okay. It's no problem.
Piece of gum, Mr. Cena?
Yeah. That's the whole thing!
That's the whole thing! That's the whole thing.
I thought we were gonna have to interact with it.
No, no, no, listen, listen, listen.
Please, ago, Mr. Cena?
Okay.
The confidence that you're projecting
is truly outrageous. I'm loving the confidence.
Can you try to get away with John?
Wait, what's this?
What's slapping the leg?
I just wanna keep it where you take,
can you do a take where you say John?
Yeah, yeah.
And raise your mic up too,
so you don't have to hunch over like a little, like a cool
piece of gum John.
Whoa, why did you yell?
Why did you just yell at me, Jabroni?
I'm gonna talk about you on SmackDown tonight.
What's your full Christian name?
Give me a stick of, give me stick of gum John.
Stick of gum John?
Stick of, do you like a stick of gum, John. Stick of gum, John? Stick of, do you like a stick of gum, John?
Ooh!
John?
Hey John, John.
I wanna refer you to an elite unit.
Give me a Mr. Cena.
Give me a Mr. Cena.
Stick of gum, Mr. Cena?
Mm, yeah.
Stick of gum, Mr. Cena?
And then if he says yes, then we're friends.
If he says no, he's getting coffee.
And eventually he's gonna be like,
I probably should take this poor guy's gum.
It seems really important to him.
And then he starts to rely on that gum, right?
Cause then maybe that day someone's like,
hey, John, great breath today.
And he's like, thank you, I had a piece of gum.
And then it's like, you're a lucky charm maybe, right?
Eventually he'll say yes, you'll be friends.
And in this universe, sorry,
John Cena doesn't know where to get gum from outside of you.
That's a very important question.
Whoever thinks of picking some up.
Look, I got a jumbo bag of Eclipse on my desk right now.
No problem, Mr. Cena.
He's not gonna have it walk around a jangly-
That's not a stick of gum though, right?
Those are little sort of tablet gums.
Cube of gum?
Chickletab? Chickletab of gum, Mr.? Those are little sort of tablet gums. Cube of gum? Chickle tab?
Chickle tab?
Chickle tab of gum?
Mr. Cena?
This is great juice, I know.
Coffee candy?
Mr. Cena?
Moist towelette?
Moist towelette?
Mr. Cena, would you like my pocket knife, Mr. Cena?
Any help today?
Would you like my cash, Mr. Cena?
Let me just ask you, how many pieces,
in all the times that we've been lucky enough
to have FaceTime with our audience,
how many sticks of gum have you accepted from them?
How many sticks of gum?
Okay, but here's the problem is that
we're colleagues in this situation
because we just go to the same coffee shop, right?
So, there's no power dynamic.
There's no power dynamic, right?
You have to pretend like you don't know him.
Maybe, yeah, no Mr. Seen- Hey, I got enough gum here for everybody in the place.
You offer it to some people,
and then you say, you big stranger.
Yeah, or piece of gum, mister.
Just like, hey, you're the Undertaker, right?
You want some gum?
Yeah.
I'll hit him egging.
I don't know if that's good or bad.
I think people would be pretty stoked.
Hey, small fry, piece of gum.
That way, let him know you see him just as another.
And now we can go back to the other question
about being strong and being complimented on your strength.
This is really a holistic episode.
I think we're helping everybody.
This one's for the strong ones, for sure.
Ever been to Chipotle, Jon?
If you told me, if you told me Jon-
If you told me John Cena had not.
There's no fucking way John Cena doesn't pound.
Because at Chipotle, you can get as much protein
packed into a little bowl as you possibly, as you want.
So definitely John Cena eats a Chipotle tooth.
But he doesn't go with himself, right?
No, he doesn't fuck, he doesn't do anything himself.
If you're asking me if John Cena has ever physically
been inside a Chipotle,
I want to say it's no, right? Like no feels like the answer to me. If you, or Griffin,
are you googling for pictures of John Cena in a Chipotle right now? I'm trying to tell. I'm trying to find it.
I'll tell you what, you won't find any pictures of me in a Chipotle, but that's not because who cares? Yeah.
But that's not because who cares like yeah, he's there
No, I can't find it. I'm coming up short. I'll also say trap I think they got some of the best chips in the business when they're hitting okay
Let's go the money's up
Did you guys know that John Cena used to be a character
in WWE called the Doctor of Thuganomics?
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
It sucks so bad.
If you told me the Doctor of Thuganomics
had not been to a Chipotle,
I would push you over physically.
You're lying to me.
If you have been putting something off for a long time,
part of the problem may be that you just haven't made
it convenient enough for yourself.
If I have a task that I hate doing,
maybe it's not that I'm a procrastinator.
Maybe it's just not the right size of commitment.
Maybe you gotta take it a little bit step at a time.
Let me give you one example.
That thing you've been trying to mail
and it's like such a hassle
because you gotta go all the way down the post office.
You gotta wait in the line,
you gotta talk to the people
and you gotta find the parking and all that stuff.
What if you do all of it at your house with stamps.com?
Wait, do I have to deal with the people at my house?
Or the parking?
Only if they barge in on you.
If you lock the door,
you won't have to deal with anybody while you're doing all of your
shipping business.
All you need to make this work is a computer and a printer.
They'll send you a scale so you can measure out what you're sending and they've got huge
discounts.
It's not just more convenient.
You can save like 89% off at USPS and UPS is part of this.
So make this one thing, mailing stuff,
just a little bit easier.
Maybe make it a little bit easier on yourself
to get some of this stuff off your to-do list.
Free up more time for more important business
with stamps.com.
Sign up at stamps.com and enter code MYBROTHER
for a special offer that includes a four-week trial
plus free postage.
Whoa!
Free digital scale.
Whoa!
No long term commitments or contracts?
That's stamps.com.
Sorry, I always forget the listeners can't see the video.
Tony Hawk just showed up and started doing all the work.
Yeah, that's stamps.com code mybrother.
Stamps.com and the code, my brother, stamps.com.
And the code is my brother.
Ego some John Hodgman.
At Ego some Janet Varney.
And we're the hosts of E Pluribus Motto,
a podcast dedicated to exploring the mottos
of every state in the union.
Every episode, we will spotlight one state
and discuss its official symbols, the motto,
flowers, birds, beverages, songs, and even official state muffins.
Plus we'll hear from guests whose lives have been inspired by the state's iconography
and from residents, who call that state home.
Bring some snacks, a map, and your travel journal because this podcast is a virtual
journey like no other.
Au di nostrum e pluribus motto quaili battalia luni di maximum fun.
And for the Latin challenged among you and us, listen to e pluribus motto every other
Monday on Maximum Fun.
Since 2017, Maximum Film has had the same slogan.
The podcast that's not just a bunch of straight white guys.
Ooh, we've learned something over the years.
Some people out there really do not like that slogan. The podcast that's not just a bunch of straight white guys. Ooh, we've learned something over the years.
Some people out there really do not like that slogan.
Listen, we love straight white guys.
Well, some of them.
But if there's one thing we can't change, it's who we are.
I'm Ify, a comedian who was on Strike last year in two different unions.
I'm Dreya, I've been a producer and film festival programmer for decades.
And I'm Alonzo, a film critic who literally wrote the book on queer Hollywood.
You can listen to us talk movies and the movie biz every week on Maximum Film.
We may not be straight white guys, but we love movies and we know what we're talking
about.
Listen to Maximum Film on Maximum Fun or wherever you listen to podcasts. I won a $10 gift card to a local tea shop.
The prize package included this faux movie poster, made to promote the return of one
of their flavors.
They made some fake trailers on Instagram.
I have no intention of hanging the poster, but I feel like I can't throw it or give
it away.
What do I do?
That's from impossibleoster in Post Falls.
So the post.
Idaho?
ID, yeah, what other state would that be?
I don't know.
The poster, because this is a visual,
is primarily an audio medium,
is for a film called The Tarot Returns.
And by film I guess I mean flavor,
and it's just a picture of four people sitting in chairs.
And that's about it.
It's pretty dramatic.
It's very dramatic looks on their faces,
and they are all wildly different sizes.
Like wildly different sizes.
And I think I would say, I think,
I think the scale here would denote a level of importance
within the flavor, like the rankings here.
The way it is composed, it looks like this would be
like a movie with not a huge budget,
but they did get Christian Slater to be in it.
And so in the poster, Christian Slater is like four times
the size of any other dude.
I guess there is one thing I want to address
with the makers of the Tarot Returns.
There are four people featured prominently in this poster
and only three names listed.
So there must have been some kind of crediting dispute.
Well, the other one's Christian,
like you know that's Christian Slater.
You don't even need to put his name on the poster.
Yeah, this is tough sometimes,
but you gotta remind yourself that it's not,
it's not, it doesn't have feelings.
Like it doesn't, you shared the image, right?
You've captured it for history.
That's a great point, Chus.
You have, I will say, by sending this in,
extended its power, extended its reach.
Dramatically, dramatically. Dramatically, right?
I mean, Travis picked the question out
to include in the show, so really a lot of the credit
goes to Travis. I bet you this will end up
on our
Tumblr or something. Instagram, some, you know,
you'll see it out there.
Justin, I would like to- But it's done,
it's work is done.
Yeah. I would like you to tell me if I'm wrong, Justin.
I think you'd put this up in your home.
Would I? Justin McElroy.
I think that if you got this from a local cafe
where you won a $10 gift card,
and you were given this poster and
you could put this up in your home and have people say, sorry, what is this?
Somewhere in your home, you would hang this up.
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah.
I went in a heartbeat.
Yeah, that's probably true.
I did steal the beer prices sign that they hung up during Margaritaville because someone had used AI art to create it
and it is truly outstanding.
There's a lot of real unpredictable geometry
and a lot of extra teeth in Mr. Buffett's head.
Awesome.
I do, I mean, lots of people pay tens of thousands of dollars
for these priceless works of art,
just so that they can have a topic of conversation
when they do invite guests over to sit
and socialize in the drawing room.
This is a free poster you got for not a lot of money.
And it actually came with money.
You got $10 extra for coffee stuff or tea stuff.
And so that's great.
If I walk into your home and you have a fake movie poster
for something called the Tarot Returns
with three names before boys,
I'm gonna wanna know what the story is with that.
Do you know those people?
No. Are they friends of yours?
Are they friends of yours? Huh?
No. What is this movie?
It's not.
It's not a movie.
It's a tea flavor. It's a flavor?
It's a flavor.
Huh.
So you like tea?
Let's talk about that.
Are they friends or are you guys closer?
No, I don't know.
Dude, this is such a fucking good one
because they learn a lot about you that you like tea.
Every first date you should demand
must be in your drawing room.
And you walk in- And you can play a game
where you're like, what name do you think corresponds with what person?
What do you think your relationship is within, like, the group?
Who's the shy one? Who's the bad boy?
You know, one of them.
Is it possible that one of them is named Taro?
Is that possible? Maybe.
And maybe his name is just Taro.
So when it says the Taro Returns, it's like,
it's not just talking about the plant,
but rather the man also named Tarot.
I don't know, I like that though,
it's a cool, strong name.
I'm also not entirely certain
what location they're at in this photo.
It looks like a dark room that someone's being held
against their will in somewhere, maybe.
I am threatened.
I guess that's the question I have
from the creators of Terror Returns
when you're making this poster,
assumedly, so that people will come in
and buy the tea that you're making.
I feel challenged.
I feel threatened.
Yeah.
That like, if I walked in and said,
can I have a Terror thing?
They'd be like, it's not for you.
It would be not for you.
You don't deserve it.
I also would have put more shit on the poster
about what the tea is and what it's like
and the flavors it brings and how long
you're supposed to brew it.
Maybe that it is tea at all.
That it is tea, that's a good point, Travis.
There's a drink, a consumable, maybe the name of the shop.
Maybe any pertinent tea tales.
But let me tell you something, let me tell you something.
I'm glad that shit's not on here.
You know why?
Because I walk into your home and I see that and then it's like, yummy bug tea shop. I see that and I'm like, oh, let me tell you something. I'm glad that shit's not on here. You know why? Because I walk into your home and I see that
and then it's like, yummy bug tea shop.
I see that and I'm like, oh, it's a tea poster.
That would ruin it.
I'm not asking you about your tea poster.
Like that sucks that you have that up.
But a mystery poster for a film that doesn't exist?
Ugh.
Yeah, I wanna know about that.
You like tea, huh?
My grandfather brewed tea.
Like this date is going so well.
And all you have to do is go to your drawing room with them.
Let's take them straight back to the drawing room.
That's what I'm saying, date one, right to the drawing room.
You learn everything you need to know about that person
based on how they look at your fake movie poster for tea.
Duh-la-la-la-la-la.
Okay.
Duh-la-la-la-la-la.
Little bit. Duh-la-la- I want to munch Squad! Junior, what could munch Squad Junior?
It's a podcast that's in the podcast profile in the latest edition of Span Eating.
Within a podcast, it sounds like.
No, it's just a shorter version.
It's a mini-bite.
We call them snacks.
We don't.
We've never done that.
I'm not sure what that is.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It's a podcast within the podcast profile in the latest podcast. It sounds like no, it's just a shorter version
It's a mini bite. We call them snacks. We've never done that
But I just did want to mention a quick thing
About baski robbins because I think that it's important that if we don't call out these brands for
Immoral behavior then nobody will so I wear the last vanguard of morality. I wanted gonna take a second to talk about this.
Okay, I'm gonna share with you the imagery.
Introducing wickedly tempting new treats,
Twix caramel crunch and the spooktacular polar pizza.
Now, oh man, until the last two words of that headline,
I was like, yum yum, sounds all good to me.
Hmm, don't let your sweet tooth down this spooky season.
Get ready to indulge in the ultimate Halloween treats.
If you're looking for some hauntingly delicious desserts,
Baskin-Robbins is introducing new flavor of the month,
Twix Caramel Crunch.
I'm very interested.
Yep, thumbs up.
And the scary good
Sputacular polar pizza ice cream treat so they're gonna need to sell me on that one that one
I'm not so sure flavor the month Twix caramel crunch. Okay
Okay, see it's got I'm not even gonna talk to you about what's it. It's like
It looks good
It looks good, right? Now, here's the spectacular polar pizzeria.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
It says, step into the Twilight Zone
and enjoy this pre-sliced shareable dessert.
What?
This is what I wanna add.
This is what was bothering me.
And before we get deeper into this, I wanna say,
just admit you forgot it was Halloween.
Yeah.
Just admit that when you were coming up with flavors and stuff
You didn't remember it was Halloween stop trying to pretend that you need to be scary
Justin, could you read the last sentence of the Twix caramel crunch paragraph?
Yes, Travis. Thank you. That is the next sentence. I wanted to read. Thank you. Good
I available while supplies last.
Make sure to grab Twix caramel crunch before it ghouls away.
Okay, listen, that doesn't make it scary.
And it also doesn't make any sense.
Ghouls away.
I think, I mean, you could change,
you could change a handful of words in any of these
and have it be like,
grab the cookie crunch polar pizza
before Santa Claus comes to deliver the presents
before Christ's resurrection.
Uh oh.
You're a lover and you can share this
sextacular polar pizza.
Say thanks to dad with a dadtastic polar pizza.
Also, the pizza itself looks like you gave free reign
to a child.
Dude, it is a child's fantasy of,
it's a child's fantasy snack.
Can we describe it?
They also take one bite of,
and they're like, I actually got too much.
I'm gonna read, I wanna read this paragraph actually
without editorializing it,
it's gonna be really difficult, but I'm going to.
You can also enjoy our flavor of the month
in our delicious new Spooktacular Polar Pizza.
Step into the Twilight Zone
and enjoy this pre-sliced shareable dessert
featuring a chocolate chip cookie crust
topped with Twix caramel crunch,
M&M's milk chocolate candies, Halloween sprinkles,
and drizzle with fudge topping.
It's perfect for sharing with your ghouls
at your next Halloween party.
You guys are really stuck on ghouls, huh?
Yeah, I got ghouls in the frame.
But you've also used them in two different ways.
Yeah, exactly, like they're admitting
that they know about ghouls.
It's not a joke.
I feel like this does slightly read
like you put in an AI prompt for a press release
for these two items,
and then you were added, like add to previous order,
Halloween ghouls.
That's right Griffin, the bots think that they can just
write these on themselves because nobody's watching,
but bad news for you bots, I'm watching.
We're fucking watching dude.
Justin McIlroy and his brothers are out here watching
every movie you bots make.
Don't think you can get one past me. I know that no human broke schools twice in one paragraph.
Just admit that you forgot. Just admit you forgot.
Also, I do like that they have shared as a bullet point that this is pre-sliced.
Because at the point I would be at where I would buy one of these, that would be a major plus.
Dude, it- Well, cause you're probably too stoned
to safely operate a knife.
Yeah, no kidding, dude.
This shit looks bananas.
It looks like the carpet at the Portland airport.
This fucking shit looks crazy crazy.
It's also ice cream, so you know all of those M&Ms
and sprinkles and shit rock hard.
Rock hard M&Ms.
Outbreaking.
Now look at right here, now right here at the bottom.
Don't be scared to try all our treats
from October 1st through October 31st
by any polar pizza and any two novelty ice cream bar boxes
for just $31.
Don't worry, we won't tell a soul.
What is, now is that supposed to be scary
or are you threatening?
Threatening, because I didn't even think
you would tell anyone, Nebraska Robbins.
Yeah, we won't tell anybody
about your nasty predilection.
Also, is $31 a good price?
Is it a good amount of money to spend on these three things?
They just love the branding opportunities.
Now listen,
meanwhile,
over at Sonic,
Oh,
check this out.
Now that's what I'm fucking talking about.
Sonic unveils a spectacular Halloween treat with new witches brew slush float.
Yeah,
casting a spell on taste buds nationwide this Halloween season with the launch of the witches brew slush float. Yeah. Cashing a spell on taste buds nationwide this Halloween season with the launch
of the Witches Brew Slush Float.
Witches Brew Slush Fund.
It's a, it's part of the Flavorista Favorites
premium drink lineup.
That's right, a premium treat for the holiday.
Thank you.
It's a limited time seasonal treat
and is a refreshing twist on the
classic caramel apple treat.
Wait, a limited time treat treat and is a refreshing twist on the classic caramel apple treat. Wait, a limited time treat and it's a refreshing twist on the caramel classic caramel apple treat?
Yeah, thanks, bots. We got you on this one, too.
But I do want to say the Witches Brew slush full of combines the tartness of green apple.
Thank you. Seasonal and salted caramel bubbles.
The salted caramel bubbles are like pitch black.
The whole drink looks terrifying.
There is no way you would sell this
at any other time of year, right?
You're not gonna come out with this ugly thing in spring.
Yeah, no way.
This horrible drink, unless you're celebrating
like a new release of a Shrek movie.
Yeah, I was thinking also had Shrek on the mind on this one.
Okay, that is actually a very good point.
Witch's Brew is our twist on a caramel apple
that stands out from the crowd
with its unique blend of seasonal flavors and textures,
says Mackenzie Gibson.
A witch.
A witch.
A real witch.
Popped into the witch who works at Sonic.
This hauntingly good creation
not only captures the essence of Halloween season,
but also delivers a deliciously fun experience
that's truly a one of a kind,
which is Bruce sure to become a seasonal favorite.
And I will hold them to that, by the way.
I will be checking up and make sure you bring it back.
In the future.
It is completely up to you
if it becomes a seasonal favorite.
Anyway, that's what's happening in the Halloween world.
I just wanted to share that Baskin-Robbins
is a corrupt company that should be shut down.
That's a really, I would agree just on optics of this fucking polar pizza alone.
Because they forgot about Halloween.
And if they, as always, all brands have always been more than welcome to email
follow ups to the Mudge Squad desk.
If you would like to issue corrections, if we've gotten something wrong, I will say this folks, in my 10
long years in the Mudge Squad industry, I have never had a brand ask me for a
retraction, which to me is basically agreement.
You've worked your way up from the bottom.
They acknowledge their own flaws.
I've never lied on this show.
He's never lied, not once.
Thank you so much for listening to our podcast,
My Brother, My Brother, Me.
733 of them and I'm still having just as much fun
as I did the first time.
Probably more.
Definitely more.
I'm not so stressed about it.
Yeah, so chill.
Hey, very exciting.
This week, this very week, it was this very week
that we're going to be in Denver and Phoenix.
We're doing My Brother, My Brother and Me
in Denver on the 18th, and then Phoenix,
we're doing Adventure Zone and My Brother, My Brother and Me.
That Adventure Zone is a Taz versus Drak Halloween special.
As far as the My Brother My Brother
means go, if you have questions that you want answered or a wish to fungal or that you want
read aloud, email it to nbmbam at maximumfun.org and put the name of your city that you'll be
attending in the subject line. We also have in November shows in Indianapolis and Milwaukee,
and Dad and I are going to be not too long now,, into this month, I believe the 25th and 26th at MCM London,
doing some panels there, doing some signings,
photos, stuff like that, I think.
So check that out, bit.ly-macroittours
for tickets and information.
We also have merch in the Macroitt merch store,
macroittmerch.com, got Reece stocked Tongardice
and a Trav Nation t-shirt.
I was wearing it yesterday.
It's probably my favorite t-shirt we've done.
If you can get one, get it while it's fast.
We got a couple on there.
Get it what?
Get it while it's hot.
Get it while it's fast and hot, dude.
And 10% of all proceeds this month go to Native Women Lead.
So go check that out, macromurch.com.
Thanks to Montaigne for the use of our theme song.
My life is better with you.
I almost said our life is better with you,
but that's also true.
Like our lives are better
because of Montaigne's incredible work on this one.
So check it out and go listen to all Montaigne's work
because it's fantastic.
All right.
We have a final wish that we want to elevate to fungalore.
It's unnecessary, but we do it in a way that's showing
accountability.
We'll send it up.
Juicy, you want to read this one?
Yeah.
I wish blood pressure numbers meant something to me.
My name is Justin McElroy.
I'm Travis McElroy. I'm Travis McElroy.
I'm Griffin McElroy.
It's been my brother, my brother, me.
Kiss your dad.
Square on the lips. My life, ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah