My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 751: Face 2 Face: Tragic Mike Tour

Episode Date: February 24, 2025

Vroom, vroom! We're staying Faster Than Fear with the first Thunder Drive show straight from Tampa! Things get wet and beachy in Florida as we dole out wisdom about Hulk Hogan, sexy farmers, the least nutty nut, and picking up pheasants.Suggested talking points: Wheres Cars Pees From, Brutus “The Candlestick Maker” Beefcake, Clear Legal Yes, Seagrass by Fortnite, Where the Luck Comes Out, Did you Look Up Pheasant Shit Backstage?You can see a photo of our outfits from this show on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/DGdRa_ZR6Zz/World Central Kitchen: https://wck.org/

Hey, we know you're chomping at the bit to get at this next little dollop of McElroy content, but we've got some big news that we can't get enough of it. You nasty, nasty, hungry dogs. We are coming back to the road. Uh, thanks to those who came to see us in Florida. We are getting right back out there though, with this leg of the 20th Thunder drive tour, we're coming to Virginia, North Carolina, Michigan, Minnesota and Ohio tickets are going gonna go on sale this Friday,

February 28th at 10 a.m. in the local time of those venues. We got more info and ticket links available at bit.ly forward slash McElroy Tours. Let's grab someone here at this live show we're at now in Tampa, see how they feel about it. Hey, what's up buddy? How do you feel about the live show you went to tonight? That was the greatest night of my life, Seth. Oh my God. Seven out of 10. Why's up, buddy? How do you feel about the live show you went to tonight? That was the greatest night of my life, Seth! 7 out of 10!

Why's your pants wet? Okay, well come see us- You ruined me! Okay, come see us- I'll never laugh again! Okay, so bit.ly slash McElroy Tours, come see us. Enjoy the episode. The McElroy brothers are not experts! And their advice should never be followed.

Travis insists he's a sexpert. But if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby! Who was coming for me? Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach My life, it feels like My life, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with you My life, ah ah ah

It's better, it's better with you This is true, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with you This is true Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah Justin Tyler McElroy. What's up, Trav Nation? Vroom, vroom. I'm your middle brother, Travis Big Dog Wolf Wolf McElroy. What's up? It's me, your youngest, sweet, baby-est brother, 30 under 30, media luminary, Griffin, Bill Ford Tough, McElroy. Now, as everyone in the theater can see, we have left the five best seats open for the five original Power Rangers.

And once again, as we do it every show, they have declined the invite. I have to take the helmet off. I can't hear anything to do jokes for you that you paid for. Can you take it off with the gloves on? Okay. It is nice. I will say it is nice after pretty much every year since we've been doing live shows to have a theme where I don't look like a fucking clown and I look cool as shit instead. They thought I was some sort of human avatar of Lightning McQueen, when clearly I'm a human member

of Lightning McQueen's pit crew. I thought that- Are you imagining the only human member? If you've seen the Cars movies, you know that Cars aren't allowed to do work on other cars. That's sex for them. They obviously can't do that at a public event like the Daytona 500 or whatever happens in the car.

So yes, there's human, human men present. That they keep around just to service them. If they had other cars touching Lightning McQueen, you would have to hear Owen Wilson like, oh yeah, like. It is weird at that point when he's doing the race and we've only seen cars at that point. And then the like kind of a little bit bloodstained like kind of gate opens up and the humans rush out

quickly fix the tires and then run back cowering. They never addressed that in the story. I will say this, not my most mobile costume, ironically enough. Not a lot of freedom of movement, ironically enough, in my race car pit crew costume. Specifically, your movement to the bathroom before the show was impeded,

you were mentioning to me. You're a vintage. And you're meant to access, Griffin, and your ritual. And your commitment to access pockets. Let's just say it won't come as a surprise to you that the three of us share a pre-show ritual, is that we have to pee as we're walking on stage, basically. And Griffin could not get in his last minute pee

because of the constrictions of his uniform. It is extra sad seeing a Lightning McQueen pit crew uniform crumpled on the ground at the foot of the toilet. I've seen it at so many Comic Con hotel rooms, I can't tell you. You should have just done what they did in the movie and give you a bucket to use as the only human. This costume gap starts at my navel.

There's no access to anything down there. Well, that's where cars come from. This is a big suit-shaped chastity belt in more ways than one. Griffin and I were standing backstage and the crew next to the crew here were getting their first look at our costumes and I told them don't worry no matter how much this may look like a strip show it is not a sort of Magic Mike tribute act. To which I responded, Tragic Mike, which is what the name of the film would be. Yeah, that's our tour. This is the tragic Mike.

No, it's not. It's an advice show. Yeah. And that yeah. Yeah. What we do is we take your questions and we turn them alchemy-like into wisdom. And I think we should get started. Yeah, do you think that there was a small time stage magician who called himself Magic Mike? And then the movie came out and he was like, oh man. Everyone's going to expect me to be cut and nude. Speaking of cut, local celebrity Hulk Hogan is a regular at the restaurant where I work. I really don't want to wait on him. What can I do to ensure I never have to be his server?

Thanks brothers. They don't leave a name. I find if I don't- Are you here? Yeah. All right. Hell yeah. I find if I don't want to wait on Hulk,

I just tell him we gotta be there 30 minutes before we actually do. And then he'll be ready in time. Yeah, he'll fall for anything. I don't know that you wanna even ingest, talk about hanging out with Hulk Hogan. Yeah, that's true. I think we're all lewd too.

You could hire also as a server Brutus Beefcake. Yeah. And then Hulk Hogan's not gonna come sniffing around there anymore. Yeah. Cause Brutus Beefcake will kick his ass. Yeah, okay. So sorry.

You mean Brutus the Barber Beefcake? No. Or Brutus the Baker Beefcake or Brutus the Candlestick Maker Beefcake? Brutus Beefcake sounds like he tried to leave wrestling behind him. He's like, no, I'm no longer Brutus the the candlestick maker beefcake. Brutus beefcake sounds like he tried to leave wrestling behind him. He's like, no, I'm no longer Brutus the barber beefcake. Now I'm just Brutus beefcake attorney-at-law.

Well, when you become a pediatric dentist, you have to change your name so that it's not scary anymore. Now he's Brutus the dentist toothache. Yeah, that's good. Ha ha ha! Is there a level of excited to wait on Hulk Hogan you could pretend to be that would ensure you were never allowed to wait on Hulk Hogan? Oh please let me run wild on him! Please!

You would shape yourself as such a massive Hulk Hogan now Travis I do think that that would probably keep you off Hulk Hogan duty. Is it worth I wonder I'm wondering myself now Is it worth all your co-workers thinking you're an absolute Hulkamania? now Justin I'm glad you asked part of the fiction would have to be that you're a huge fan Who hasn't been able to get any updates in the last like 15 years. Okay, right. I'm so excited to check in with him finally. Yeah, my AO-

What's he been up to? My AO-L free trial ran out, brother. I haven't gotten any updates. What are you into, charity? What kind of good stuff you doing, man? You're an American hero. I can't wait to hear what cool things in the last 15 years. You and Bubba Love still palin' around or what?

You guys still best buds? It would be really hard if I ran into him not to tell him about the giant cookie I promised Dwight I'm gonna buy him the day he dies. But I bet he doesn't want wanna hear that anecdote at all. Oh, there's a dry cooking on the line brother. I need to start living life more recklessly. I enjoy taking trips to the beach by myself. I don't see what that has to do with Hulk Hogan.

Yeah. But whenever I do, other people always set up way too close to me, like way too close within a few feet of me. Even when there's plenty of space elsewhere, it seems like no matter where I set up to enjoy some sun and sea, other people go out of their way to invade my space. How do I stake out my territory at the beach and keep others from getting all up in it?

That's from Beach Bummed in Orlando. Are you here? Hello. Hi. Is there a level of Hulk fan you could act like? I'm wondering now actually Travis, if vociferously talking about how much you love, you fucking love Hulk Hogan in 2020.

If there was a boom box busting out, I am a real American, I would probably sit many, many beach lengths away, like several towels, seven, eight towels away. You would do that, but someone who would sit close to someone else on the beach when there's plenty of beach is probably like, hell yeah, brother.

A lot of people are too afraid to sit where it's wet. But not just at the beach in life. That's a good on dry land. You shouldn't actually sit where it's there's not a good wet seat in dry land. There's not a good wet seat in the house. There's not a good wet seat in the house. I'll say yeah. By the end of the night.

This is a really good point though Griffin about the wet seat. Thank you for ignoring what I said. Yeah. I saw so much ignore as move through by force. I think that at the beach, I'm not a big beach guy. And this whole thing about sometimes the ocean can come up to where you are doing your day

is so hard for me to calculate. If I see somebody else has already posted up, I'm gonna assume they know what they're doing. Why would I be so presomptuous as to think that I know better than them vis-a-vis distance from ocean? That must be the part of the beach without sand fleas because someone's there.

It is interesting, the tide doesn't sneak up on you. Yeah. Right? I've never been sitting there and be like, the water's all the way over there. And then like two minutes later, be like, oh, it's my way of each. Hey, Travis, I should say,

you should drink more at the beach because that happens, that happens to me all the time. That's fair. What you should do is set up at the edge of the ocean and just every two minutes inch backwards. Or don't. Just slowly, and don't worry if there's anyone

seated behind you, they'll move. Just sit in a wet hole at the beach. It's a, it's- Wait, it's a hole now? Yes. It's primarily a body of- Wait, it's a hole now? Yes. It's primarily a body of water. What are you doing there if you're not getting wet? The problem is, is if you get there early

and it's already wet, by like the end of the day, you've drowned. Yeah. Find a tight little sand bar, get out there and yell at anybody who swims too close about all the e this is my island I can I tell you guys and this is gonna come as a surprise to you I think but I used to have this exact

problem People sitting too close to you. Yeah at the beach I was like a person magnet like people would roll up to me and they would like it's just I realized what my problem is I'm gonna share with you cuz that once I fixed, adjusted this behavior, the problem fixed itself. What I, it was not about what I was doing, it was about what I stopped doing. What I stopped doing was every time someone was in 50 feet

of me, I stopped shouting, hey, I got suds for my buds, let's do this thing. Yeah, yeah. And I would shout every time anybody, adult would get within like 30 feet like hey I got subs for my buds. Let's do this thing and then they would inevitably come over and you'd be like why did they come? Why are they coming over and I don't know if you ever yell? I got subs for my buds Let's do this thing at passersby

repeatedly until they come over adult passersby Yeah, cuz I need their children he has milkuds, and he yells duds from my butt, they're like, those are kids. I know if you ever yell at kids, cause you don't, cause you're here, and I appreciate you not yelling at kids, thank you. Here's what I do, it's a simple trick. There's a little life hack that you guys can have.

It's two things you need. You just need some like big wooden sticks, right? And you're gonna set those up in corners, wherever you want, and then some police tape. And you're just gonna set up a perimeter around yourself and you sit in the middle. And I promise you, people will leave you alone. Hey, here's a question for you folks.

This is what I've been thinking about. No matter how close you set up somebody, it's weird at the beach, right? But if you move even three inches closer to them, that's way weirder. Why is that? If I say four feet away, but I move a little bit closer, people get weird, you know?

But if you start two feet away- Like the tide. Like the tide, exactly. Travis, that's a really good point. You're a human tide. The human tide, that's what they call me. When you wrestle against Hulk Hogan, it's all gonna be about Hulk Hogan tonight. Please Christ, no.

I'd rather that not be the case. I'm a marine biologist and a couple of times a year I'm asked to speak to children about my job. The problem is I work with seagrasses. And the kids find this incredibly boring. Huh. The problem is I work with seagrasses. And the kids find this incredibly boring. They prefer cool stuff like sharks and manatees. Hey, thanks for examples of things that are cooler than seagrass. Yeah, I was going to struggle to come up. I would have been flailing up here.

Like grass in the waves. Seagrasses are super important habitat. Brothers. All right. Brothers, how do I get children interested? You know what else is? Dirt. In my extremely exciting underwater plants. That's from super seagrass savvy in St. Pete. Are you here?

Wow, there's so many of you. Wait, how many marine biologists are here? That's cool. You know what, actually, I bet Tampa Bay has a lot of marine biologists. I will say for your sales pitch in the future, the leading bullet point shouldn't be cool stuff lives there. To me, that feels like I would rather hear about the cool stuff living in the house of the seagrass.

I'm already, I already don't care a lot about the ocean, but I recognize there's some cool stuff down there. That's true. People don't focus on the fortress of solitude as the main character in Superman. True. It's tough when you have things that we already have up top. Yes. Never going to get the billing.

It's never going to get the hype as the things that are unique to water. I'll give, and if you are something that already exists up on land, you gotta come with some surf hash heat. I'll give you guys an example. Sponges underwater are alive. Yeah, that's what it takes. Because otherwise, I'd be like, I got sponge.

You know what I mean? But then they're like, this one, J-Man, it's alive. If just one representative from the marine biology community who asked this question could answer this. Scale of one to 10, how many fun facts are there about sea grass? Four? Now what's interesting is Griffin did say a scale of one to ten, how many?

Does that mean on a scale of one to ten, there's a four level amount or there are four? Four fun facts about seagrass. One, bigger than land grass. Two, slimier significantly than land grass. Wetter. Wetter. Habitat for all kinds of cool shit that I do not have time to go into right now.

To Justin's point, these kids aren't gonna study this. And if they do, by the time they get to that point, they're jaded adults. Tell them it can talk, but only underwater. They don't know. They don't know. This, oh, the seagrass dances when you're not looking at it. Yeah, it's the hair of dead mermaids.

Well now hold on, that might not play the way you want it to. Yeah, good point Travis. What? Yeah, that's right, mermaids are real, but they are all dead. Their lifespan is four weeks. We tricked kids into pillaging turkey carcasses

because we told them there's a special bone that grants wishes. Yeah. So I feel like we could get this going for seagrass. Like it needs a rebrand. I think if we could call, I mean it's wet. You can call it wet weed.

Is seagrass different from seaweed? Yes. Okay. You took a long time to answer that. I'm not so sure. Well, seagrass you want to grow. Seaweed grows in the seagrass. And you're like, I gotta pull this out now. We're doing, I got a problem right now.

Sometimes this happens on the show where we talk about something that I know nothing about for long enough that I start to think like, I should really problem right now. Sometimes this happens on the show where we talk about something that I know nothing about for long enough that I start to think like, I should really learn more about seagrass. That's the age I am now. I don't know about earth grass and I deal with that shit all the time.

Yeah, wait a minute. You just need to change your audience. I don't want to hear any more shark facts. I've been fed those against my will for like two decades now. I don't know shit about seagrass. If seagrass showed up at my TikTok algo, I'd be like, hmm.

Can I just say, let's check in here on seagrass. You need to start Grass Week. Grass Week is like a week long all special things where like maybe the Mythbusters are covering episodes about seagrass and Terry Crews is there for some reason, talk about seagrass. Yeah, everybody loves seagrass and it's a rebrand, right? We call it... We gave you so long! You had so long to think about it!

Well, nothing there. I thought there would be, but I didn't think about it in the interim. I know I looked like I was thinking about it, but I wasn't. Seagrass by Fortnite. That's right, guys. We finally did it it we went and put seagrass in Fortnite. We partnered with seagrass. To put it in. What's the what's the I'm sorry to keep asking you questions this isn't usually the format of the show but just like what's the coolest animal that calls seagrass its habitat? Seahorse. Yeah all right. What you got to do is be like, you kids

like seahorse? They may or may not. I was hoping it would be something fucking rad like Barracuda or something, but like you hold up a seahorse and you say, pretty cool, huh? You say, Mr. Seahorse, how do you feel about seagrass? To get the seahorse to vouch for how cool seagrass is. And it says whatever you want, so you'll put it back in the water. Whatever you want, please. I love seagrass, this is a great home.

Do you think that the problem isn't that the kids don't think it's cool, but that when you say a seahorse that lives in seagrass, that they're like, you need to come up with better terms. Cause you're just putting sea in front of things I have. Yeah. You also wouldn't say a horse lives in grass. Wouldn't you?

No, I guess horse has his own home. Nobody's down there building seahouse barns, are they? No. That'd be pretty cool if they were though. I mean, horses spend a lot of time around grass. They love that shit. They do actually. You gotta go and talk to the kids about seagrass when they're looking at the seahorses already Cuz they're interested in something. Yeah. Yeah, that's like those guys. They'd all be fucking

Dead as disco without this sweet green stuff. Are you guys enjoying the seahorses? Huh? I'd like to talk to you about the glue that's holding this whole thing together. Hi, I'm Justin McElroy, paid endorser for seagrass. Why are ecosystems in danger of collapsing right now? Not seagrass, baby! Not seagrass, baby! We can't get enough of this slimy leaf. We haven't figured out how to mow it, but someday we will.

Someday we'll get down there and master the seagrass. I'm a proud tummy buddy for life. We recently did some testing and learned that I have grown out of a deadly allergy to nuts. Allergies for nuts is for babies. Whoa, hey. Whoa, no, we don't mean that. No, no, no, no. This is great news, but I'm still afraid to eat the food that has meant certain death

for my entire life thus far. How do I stay true to my tummy while also becoming faster than fear? That's from potential pecan eater in St. Pete. Are you here? Okay. Wow you're excited to eat nuts and who can blame you there's a lot of great nut stuff. Before we discuss this three dummies in these outfits, your doctor told you it was cool to eat them? You're sure, right? You promise. Can I get a clear legal yes? Yes.

Okay. And you agree that if anything were to happen, like maybe there's one nut, like macadamia or something way off the map that you eat and that at your funeral they played a video of us on stage right now. You're clearing us of any legal obligations. Your family's lawyer has to let the tape play pass to this part, right?

They can't cut it off. We should have said this earlier, but they could have just cut off the beginning. God, your family's lawyers are good. Your doctor didn't say like, your doctor wasn't like, it's probably cool. He didn't say like that, right?

He was like, it's 100. Not like there's a 99% chance you're cool if you eat pecans. Did you ask, hey, so have I grown out of my nut allergy yet? And that doctor just said, go nuts, and laughed. And then he laughed so hard he passed out and you left. But maybe he didn't mean it.

He just had a killer joke. Okay. Assuming that you are truly over your nut allergy. What's like the least nut? Nut. Oh, no. Oh, is that the way you're going? Because I'm saying buy a thousand Planters makes nut and screws you make duck right into No! No!

The fucking way man! It's fine a doctor said so! No Travis you have to ease in because the problem is not with the it's the fear Yeah You have to ease in so you have the least nuts which is of course the tootsie roll because nobody's quite sure Yeah Is it chocolate? Is it nuts? Is it caramel?

Is it gum? Is it nuts? Is it caramel? Is it gum? Is it gum? We don't know. Maybe start at baked beans to get used to the shape. Wait, no, like actual baked beans or Boston baked beans? Like the crunchy candy? You get Boston baked beans wet. Yeah.

So an unbaked bean. An unbaked bean. You have- A raw bean. You have Bush's baked beans, you start cutting in Boston baked beans, 10%, 20%, 30%. If you start with a big vault of peanuts, the ple- dude, they're so fucking good.

Like- You're gonna love them. If you start out, if you go and you eat a Reese's peanut butter cup right now, you'll fall down dead from the ecstasy of it. You know what? I'm gonna say start with those circus peanuts that are like the orange thing.

No, because that's not a peanut. But it's gonna get you. It's gonna get you into the form. Yeah. You're gonna get used to the form. It's like. I'm sorry, is anyone looking at circus peanuts and being like, a fat free candy, huh?

Well that swayed me, I'll go for it. I'll be like- Three of major allergens. What's that? There's, we got, we do have ragweed. That's how we get the color, sorry folks. We got some real underground shit happening in here The marshals are made from chinchilla first Little bit of tungsten. Let's say it let's bring this way. It's illegal

But only because they don't know to make it illegal. They haven't heard about it yet. That's why it's okay My sister is on farmers only calm despite having only four chickens is on FarmersOnly.com despite having only four chickens. How many chickens would you say you should have to be on Farmers Only? That's from Lily L. Lily R. Lily R. Are you here? Is Lily L. here? I heard the quietest sound. That's right.

It's okay. You don't have to identify yourself. Yeah, maybe you're here with your sister, I get it. What this question presupposes and I love is that farmers only isn't just a clever name, that it is a strict policy. That if you were to go on a date with a farmer and you started talking about your chickens

and then let slip you had four, they would stand stand up and be like this date's done. They would probably yeah I think they would be well within their rights because you will have lied to be on farmers only because four chickens does not a farmer make. Now here's what I'll say to you thousand chickens does. But. There must be a number of twigs to the two. I don't know what it is, but I'm saying four a net and a thousand is. Now I will start here. Let me. Five thousand?

You're a farmer, right? Well you're a, you're a computer at this point. Yeah. Five thousand you're a conglomerate. Like you're a big major ag like huge. You're not on farmers only. You're on conglomerate, like you're a big major ag, like huge corporate. You're not on Farmers Only, you're on like CEOs. You're the owner of Tyson's Chicken. Blackrockfans.com.

Man. I'm going to slide forward this offer to you, Justin, and you tell me a metaphorical number written on a paper. With 12 chickens, I could, no, hear me out. I could fill a dozen container every day and sell that dozen container one time a day to someone. Farmer, I can't spin up in a day. And I feel like I could buy a chicken house,

five, 12 chickens, get that going in a day. I think the fact that you call it a chicken house means it might be a little harder than you think. Hey, I'm not trying to be a farmer right now. You'll know when I'm trying to be a farmer. Okay. That's not now. I'm, I'm happy with my one two foot by two foot square of sun chokes that my wife lets me grow every year. Your wife, the farmer of sun chokes. A popular farmer.

I grow tomatoes every year and I've never been like, ah, rain good for the crops. But, if you grew 20,000 tomatoes, you would be a farmer, right? Well, what I've got, Justin, is a three foot by two. I want to talk about your sister's frame of mind here because I'm having trouble resonating spiritually with someone who has four chickens and is like, I can't relate to anyone who is not on this fucking vibe. Griffin, man. These four chickens mean fucking everything to me

and I do not give a shit about anything else in the world. I would love a fifth chicken. I don't have room in my heart. I love these four idiots so fucking much. I would posit a different possibility, Griffin, that this sister went, man, I want to date a farmer, but where do I find them? I know, I'll meet the bare minimum I can think of

to register for FarmersOnly.com. The chicken are but a gateway to the dating website. I also said only farmers, and I think that's a different thing. All right, I just finished up my work day work. Who wants to see how muddy my feet got? What? Have you ever?

No, I don't do teat stuff anymore. Have you ever been more clearly a podcaster than when you said my work day of work? That's how people with jobs talk, right? Well, honey, I'm home from the mill of working. Now I'm home day time. Tough day at the time clock, honey bunches. My boss a big rat. I mean.

I mean. I mean. I mean. I mean. I mean. I mean. I mean. I mean.

I mean. I mean. I mean. I mean. I want to try something new, Griffin. I don't know what our sponsor is for this week. There's two. We're out on the road.

We got two sponsors. We're in the money. I want to do something that nobody's ever done before, Griffin, here in the bowels of the Tampa Theater. I want to try to guess the sponsor this week. You're going to give me some clues. Give me some clues about our first sponsor, Griffin. Okay.

Well, give me some hints. How about I just start reading the ad copy? I warn you, I'm really bad at this kind of thing. Yeah. But don't get it wrong because that will they won't work with us again. So stakes are pretty high. I'll just read the I'll read the ad copy for a little bit, but I'll remove the name of the sponsor. Okay, we'll love

that. Okay, blank. My pillow. Nope. Sorry. Let me try. I do it again. You go on. Sorry. My pillow. It's not my pillow. It's not my. This one's not my pillow. They didn't get up on this particular track. Okay. Blank makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience and sell anything from products to content to time all in one place, all on your term. This is embarrassing. It's a shape. It's one of the shape ones. It is one of the shape ones. Give me another thing. Give me another thing. If we don't say the name of the sponsor soon. They legally don't have to pay us So what sounds like Squarespace, but that's what you want me to say

No, that's not my official guess because that's what you want. It is square I do a real quick and just to go back for the times. I missed it Squarespace Squarespace Squarespace That's very clever Griffin. Thanks. You're your little ruse Squarespace. That's very clever Griffin. Go ahead. You finish your little ruse. Squarespace Payments is the easiest way to manage your payments in one place with Squarespace. Get started in just a few clicks and give your customers more ways to pay with popular payment methods like Klarna, ACH, and Apple Pay. Get that money on on your own damn terms. It doesn't say that in the copy. They would never. They would never. Cuss, flair there. You grow credibility, engage visitors

with an unrivaled suite of visual design effects. We've all used Squarespace. I mean, the three of us have to make a bunch of websites. I don't know if the whole world has used it. If they did, Squarespace probably wouldn't need to advertise with us. I wouldn't think that's money well wasted. Yes, but you can make your own beautiful website.

It's so easy. It looks so good. Go to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash my brother to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Now for our second sponsor, I don't know if you want to play the game again.

No, I'm gonna try. It's a new sponsor. Okay, so I'm gonna try to get you to guess. So, okay, so you give me your phone and I'll give you the clues and you try to guess. Okay, so we'll flip it. Okay. We'll flip the game. Cool, but how are you gonna do that

if you don't know the cop? You give me your phone. I said that. So you give me your phone. Oh, okay. Okay, you ready? Yeah. All right.

Now, Griffin. Yeah. Have you ever wanted to leave a legacy? Sure, yeah, absolutely. Okay, well, can you think of any better way of doing that than the planning? Jimmy John's. So close, actually. No, we were looking for fast growing trees. Fast growing trees. I'm excited about fast growing trees Griffin to let the bit go because I have fast growing trees in my backyard from fast growing trees that have been growing there happily for quite some time now. There are two little apple trees that are doing very well and they're doing very well

because fast growing trees makes it easy to pick plants. They're going to thrive well in your environment. They give you all the tips that you need to grow the plant properly. And if you're having issues, this is, these are real people that you could reach out to and say, hey, I'm having a problem. And they've got amazing support. I've done this. I've made use of it.

They have a troubleshoot something with one of my beautiful apple trees. And now it's doing better than ever. It made fricking lemons. It made lemons. And I had that, they said, pull it out of the ground, turn it upside down, Jay, man, you done did it wrong. But that's not what they said.

No. They gave me the right advice. They probably said real stuff. No, they said something pull it out of the ground, turn it upside down, Jay, man, you done did it wrong. But that's not what they said. No. They gave me the right advice. They probably said real stuff. No, they said something about nitrates. But you probably also didn't have lemons come out of the apple tree. That was it. That was it.

That do went telecraft. That's a joke. It is not born fruit yet, but I'm looking forward to it because I got a berry bush too. They're all working together. They even recommended two apple trees that would work nicely together pollinating each other. Oh, gross. No, I'm sorry. Yeah, it was a little work nicely together pollinating each other. Oh gross. No, I'm sorry

Yeah, it was a little bit for asking I don't have the details though about what oh, yeah. Well, listen this spring. They have the best deals for your yard We haven't said their name a lot. It's fast growing trees My favorite radiohead song but this spring fast growing growing trees They have the best deals for your yard up to half off on select plants and other deals and listeners to our show get 15% off their first purchase when using the code MYBROTHER at checkout. Now is the perfect time to plant.

Use MYBROTHER to save today. Don't use my brother's body. No, don't use me to save. Don't make a friend with me just to help get my discount on fast growing trees. Anybody can. Anyone can do it with the promo code mybrother. To save today, offers valid for a limited time, terms and conditions may apply. Hey, before you get back to the rest of the episode, we did want to tell you we got some

new tour dates on the 20th Thunder Drive Tour. We're excited to share. Right now we're coming to Virginia and North Carolina and Michigan and Minnesota and Ohio so come see us if you live in those places or even nearby states and territories. Tickets go on sale this Friday February 28th at 10 a.m local time more info and tickets are available at bit.ly mackleroy tours come us. Thanks to everybody who in Florida who came out to see us in Tampa, Tampa and Jacksonville. We had a good time and we sure do appreciate you. Yeah, absolutely. We got you and tell us about the new merch. Oh yeah, we got some beautiful stuff.

Griffin, especially the holographic dare to care sticker. You know, 50% of the proceeds from that beauty are going to be donated to the world central kitchen and 10% of all our merge proceeds this month are going to go to that group, which uses the power of food to nourish communities and strengthen economies through times of crisis and beyond. We got a list of all the organizations that we have been working with over the years and have been able to donate to over the years over at McElroy family dot ca RRD dot co if you were looking for some places to give to help out. That's one spot you could do it. That's it.

Enjoy the rest of the this episode, this live episode that you're listening to. We just did it last night and it was a hoot. It was a hoot. And we'll be back with a new episode next week. All right. Later. Later, bye. (*crowd cheering*) Like Chilean miners, we've returned from the bathroom.

You can't do that after the intermission. No, but I assume they went to the bathroom at some point. I'm already so uncomfortable with the fact that we have another, what seems like, Jeb Bush please clap moment as we come out after very obviously using the bathroom. Would you rather come out in complete silence in darkness, lights come up, we're just sitting there

like we've been here the whole time. I don't know. Don't worry about it. My costume's too small and I can't return it now and it was $80. I really leaned into the thunder aspect. I didn't lean into the drive aspect as hard as you guys did. Yeah, but mine's driving and a guy named Lightning McQueen.

It's two things at once. The only problem is that if I flex my neck hard enough, I can fucking bust out of it. Oh my God, yeah. It's like when Lightning McQueen gets angry and turns green and then he's Lightning McGreen. Yeah. It's like when Lightning McQueen gets angry and turns green, and then he's Lightning McGreen. Yeah. Uh-huh.

For sure. I keep waiting to be interrupted by our older brother. You gotta stop talking for even a half a second for that to happen. To be interrupted? Da-la-la-la-la. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Ba-la-la-la-la. Yeah. Ba-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la. I want a Munch Squad! I want to Munch Squad! Welcome to Munch Squad, it's a podcast within the podcast profile and the latest grace of brand new. This is like a podcast. You came for one podcast, well you're getting two

because this is another one inside of that one which a lot of people don't talk about. That's a huge value. So man. Yeah, what's on the menu today? Oh thank you, because he's back. Grimace is back. Yeah!

And he's bringing, Grimace is back and he's bringing his uncle. That's right, guys. It's happening. Uncle... Please, yes? Uncle O Grimace is back. No.

No. Now can I just say real quick for the people at home listening, you can't see this, but they chose to put a green Grimace with a green hat and a green vest in front of a green screen okay they didn't choose to do that God made him green but the the screen could have been any color Justin but then they could pretend that they're in gladiator 2 or whatever they're gonna do with this image. This is the first time this has ever happened to me, but I feel culturally offended. It doesn't feel very good.

Right, yeah, well, let's talk about the history here. You're in luck, Shamrock Shake is back, starting February 10th, 25 cents from every Shamrock Shake show. Oh, cause luck! Jesus, Travis. A special- Let him cook, Chef. This Shamrock Season celebration came to life when Grimace stumbled upon his family's original

Shamrock Shake recipe. That discovery sparked Grimace to reconnect with his vibrant, joyful, and generous uncle, Uncle O'Gremacy. Now wait. Fuck man, wait, what's that pouch in his mids? What's that lump in his thorax? Griffin, you know exactly what that is. That's an opening, my friend, where the luck comes out.

I didn't need to see Uncle O'Gremacy's cloaca. Can I just say, actually with that cleft, he looks so much like a ball sack. Yeah, man. Yeah, you climb in there to hide your mom's sword. So Justin, what you're telling me Yeah. is that Grimace

found a recipe for the Shamrock Shake, a thing that's been at McDonald's many times. And he said, huh, I've never thought about who I'm related to before. And then maybe did a swab for 23andMe, and then said, oh, I'm related to this green Grimace, I should have noticed the similarities, especially since his name is O'Grimace.

His name has mine in it, in a sort of wild Irish pastiche Yeah, uncle. Oh grimacee has been in the mix for quite some time, but he's been off of the off the radar for a while We haven't heard from uncle. Oh grimacee who you recovery. He used to bring the shamrock shakes every time He's while McDonald's try to figure out is this okay? Yeah And then they looked around like, where is it? I guess it's fine, whatever. So he reconnected.

Grimace had his Eat, Pray, Love journey through Ireland and reawakened, inspired to fuck off. Jesus Christ. Whatever is the problem, that's just a regular man named Uncle Ogrimacy. Well, yes. With regular eyeballs, just like yours or mine.

The human being that those eyeballs are connected to shifted three inches to the left. Is that AI, or is that a stop photo? The Shalali in his hand gives it a Five Nights at Freddy's vibe. That's not the only thing giving it a Five Nights at Freddy's vibe. I also like that they make it very clear in in this ad that it's mint flavored so you wouldn't think it's shamrock flavored. Right that would be gross. Yeah gross. Inspired to reunite with Grimace and support his favorite charity's 50th milestone, Uncle O'Grimacy packed his bags

and embarked on a journey from Shamrock, Ireland. What? Why? I mean, why, guys? Why? Why not just name a real place? Why not name a real Irish city? Because then people would go looking for him.

You know, that's the problem. I bet he's not hard to find. If you kiss the Shamus of Grimacy, you get a gift of the lint in your mouth. Uh, now that he's here, Uncle O'Grimacy... No! He... this image right now tells me that uncle of grimacee is seeing some shit Our fans eagerly await the shamrock shakes that grimace talking Our fans eagerly awake the shamrock shake each year

We're thrilled that proceeds from this minty flavored treat will aid RMHC and keeping families together said joy Silman a second generation McDonald's franchisee cool Family is core value McDonald's and we live this every day And then the person was like joy Could you not say that in the article cuz it's kind of weird It's wild and my son will be a franchisee owner and his children will be a franchisee We've also never met like Ronald McDonald's wife, like family. This is a gambit you all have pulled exactly one time if I'm not mistaken.

Can I also say I love the way that they say we're thrilled as if it wasn't their decision to partner with Ronald McDonald House. As if McDonald's and Ronald McDonald house weren't going to get together until uncle O'Grimmacy stepped in and said let's get these two kids together uncle O'Grimmacy really got got us over our beef with the Ronald McDonald house we used to fucking hate those guys oh be real excuse me together with our crew customers and iconic McDonald land, Uncle O'Grimmacy. We're helping RMHC make families feel at home

even when they can't be. And then there's another couple paragraphs about the Philadelphia Eagles, and then it says- Oh, wait, is that because they've realized Gritty is related to Grimmas? Yeah, they're best friends. Our long, not the eagle, not the Eagles mascot, but close, close ish. Sorry. I was doing my be real. I wasn't paying attention. Okay. Great. Our longs imagine how terrifying that feels to be on stage with that kind

of energy. Just like, if I'm not going to be real, be real, it is fucking real though, it is as real as it gets. You want him to be real. If I could pull my phone out of my pocket without having to reach deep into my crotch to do so. I actually saw you for a minute. I saw you do a move and was like,

God, fuck. Griffin texted Paul to bring the seam ripper out. It would be the same as if you needed to buzz to be real on your appendix. Okay. Our longstanding tradition of the Shamrock Shake is a testament to the joy we bring our customers. This year we're getting back to the first fundraiser

that started our incredible partnership with RMHC, said a guy at McDonald's. This Shamrock Shake season, with a little extra cheer from the Grimace family. We're reminded that the most precious gift is being close to those you love. Hey, hey, it's me, Justin McElroy. If you ever have to be reminded what the most precious gift is by grimace, you should probably pack it in. That's probably it for real. I recognize enjoying your life. You should probably pack it in. That's probably it for real. Recognizing joy in your life.

You should probably give up on joy as an idea. If you need Grimace to remind you about your family being good. Especially since what they're kind of overriding here is that clearly there was some kind of family falling out. Because Uncle O'Grimacy has been in the canon before. So it's as if they were, they should be saying, and we're very thankful to Grimace for reminding us that like, yeah, man, some shit's definitely gone down in the past. Yeah, it should be Uncle O Grimacy like, I just climbed out of the mine hole with a bing

bong, I'm back. I've been nothing for 20 years. Ah! What's happening? Them talking about reestablishing their first charity once again as if the Ronald McDonald in Ronald McDonald House was a different Ronald McDonald. Yeah. Unrelated.

Not like Grimace and Uncle O Grimace. Can you imagine what a bummer it would be if the only other member of your whole species was your Uncle O'Grimace? You're not bringing him by. He's my only living relative. Okay, Griffin, just real quick. Grimabeth, Grimace's mom.

Louie Grimace, Grimace's dad. Winky, Grimace's grandma. Jenny Grimace, Grimace's dad, Winky, Grimace's grandma, Jenny Grimace, Grimace's great-great-grandma, King Donga, Grimace's brother who rules over all Grimaces. Whoa! Hold on, hold on! Does he rule over the Irish Grimaces too? It's not like they all live together in Grimace land. Wait, hold on. Can we jump back? His mom's name is So his mom's name is Grimabeth and then his dad's name is Louie Grimace

So that would make his name Grimace Grimace Named after Grimabeth Grimabeth her last name would then be Grimm-a-Beth Grimmis. I mean, she's a strong independent Grimmis. She kept her own last name, Grimm-a-Beth Johnson. She kept her own last name, N-A, not applicable. Are there any Grimmises that aren't related to Grimmis? That's the real big one, Griffin.

That's the big one that's really gonna cook your noodle. So the brother rules over his dad. Yeah, that's the real big one, Griffin. That's the big one that's really going to cook your noodle. So the brother rules over his dad? Yeah, that's the key. I'm king! My dad is like, I'm not dead. We are going to now help you. We've helped Grimace. Here is how this is going to work.

We're going to call down people by their names and if they've been provided seat numbers. When it's your turn, give us your name, your pronouns, if you'd like. Please don't come to the microphone if we don't call you, because we'll have three synchronized panic attacks. But at different pitches, which could be lovely. It could be cool.

Come on down to the mic, my friend, hello. Hi, I'm Tanner. I also go by Persephone. Any pronouns? Hello. Cool, hello. You're welcome. What is your question? My question is, so I worked at a clothing store.

Yeah. And on the first day I ripped my pants, how do I go back? Now this is a great question. I worked in a clothing store. I would like to pause it if it were to happen again, which God willing, in the creative world. You can't pause it if it were to happen again, which God willing in the- You can't pause it if you tear your pants at work. You can try it.

Everybody pause, pause, pause, pause, pause. No one look. Pause, everybody pause it, pause it, hold on. Can I tell you, this actually did happen to me. It's actually unrelated to what I was about to say when I worked at Best Buy. I was counting money in my couch. I was like, Scrooge. No, I was supposed to count my couch. I was like Scrooge.

No, I was supposed to count money and I ripped my pants and I stapled them back together. Okay. You did too? I tried. Now I'm gonna tell you that when I say I ripped my pants up and I stapled them together and then you say I tried, it does bring to mind that there might have been

an injury associated. No, thank God. Okay, great. But here's what you do. If it happens again, you say, don't you hate it when this happens to you? If only I had stronger, better pants. The first word-

Like these over here. The first words out of your mouth have to be, I bought these somewhere else. Yeah. Oh darn it Persephone, that'll teach you to shop at Brand X. Yes. Why did I ever go anywhere else for my great pants?

They weren't pants from the store, were they? I was, they replaced them for me. Yeah. Okay, good. Okay, can I just say, then your wrong question, how do you ensure that it happens every time so you get free pants from work? Yeah, free new pants. All right, or you can you can even play it off like um, oh, you know with other pants I might worry but here they'll replace them if you tear them at work. So it's not even a problem It's it's like any time I'm in the parking lot of a hospital

My mind just sort of without any sort of reason will offer up the thought, it's the best place to get in a terrible car accident. They'll fix you up right here. If I had worked the best by day one for whatever reason, I'd brought in my TV from home and dropped it and they gave me a new one. You best believe I'm bringing in every electronic I own from that oh no and doing it every time. Were the pants you got nicer pants? Yes. Did you have to pay for them or was it? No, my manager did. The manager paid for the pants? Persephone this is a good place. I would stick with this place it sounds alright. It is great. I quit because of... Oh! Now, Persephone, can I ask you a question? Yes. You made me punch my collar, Persephone.

That's fucking great. Did you quit between the time you sent this question in and now? So you had already quit before you asked us how do I go back? This was a while back. Okay, Persephone, did you quit while you were wearing the pants that were gifted to you? I might've. Oh, Persephone, did you quit while you were wearing the pants that were gifted to you?

I might've. Okay, Persephone. Did you say these new pants are giving me such confidence? Yeah. I realize I don't need this job anymore. I came here to pull off one very specific short run grift.

I don't need the paycheck, thank you. These pants cost $340 Everybody here can learn something Absolutely Persephone, does that help? Thank you. Oh, what a riot. Hi, how's it going? Hello? I'm good. How are you? Very good. Thank you. Hello Tampa audience. Hello Everyone say hello. Hello. I am truly going faster than fear right now

cause this is a little intimidating. Hell yeah. I appreciate you taking the time to hype up the audience. No one ever does that for us. Literally it's never been done before. It's never been done before so I appreciate that. No one ever says hi to everybody. Just basic manners.

Who are you? Oh, I'm Mackie. Hello, Mackie. Hi. Hey Griffin, can I just say real quick, when they say that they're moving faster than fear, and then you ask, who are you? Is maybe not. Who are you?

Justify yourself. I don't think I asked it in a way that made you feel nervous. Did I? It's okay. That should have been the first thing I said. No, it's I mean, yeah. But other than that, you're doing great.

Maggie, I'm sorry. I really don't want to project this energy. It's the fucking jumpsuit. I look so cool right now. Griffin, why does this energy never fucking stick to your brand? That's what I want to know. Why is this brand all like rainbows and eating bananas?

You forget he's a dick like 80% of the time. He just gives you this like, ain't I a stinker look? I guess you are. Water off a dick's back. Yeah. Mackie, I'm so excited. Water off a dick's back. Yeah. Mackie, I'm so excited for your question. Maybe when he hits 40, that the gravy train will finally run out, right?

Everybody then will get onto his fucking act. So, I'm so sorry. I'm really curious to hear your question, but my brothers are just chatty. It's okay, it's okay. What's your question? I had a couple of questions. You had one about being a NASA employee,

and a certain factor of your job. Yes, I am a NASA employee. I, yeah, space program. I love my job. How can I be more interested in the very frequent launches that happen while I'm there? Okay, this is so interesting, Mackie, because there was a sort of syntactical debate

between us on stage. Yes. Yeah, a discrepancy as to what your intention in the question was. So when you ask that, when you say, how can I be more interesting? My read was, and I'm feeling very confident now, that you were like, these launches are so frequent, I've lost interest in them.

Versus, how do I sneak out to go to these kick-ass rocket ship launches, which is what me and Justin thought the question was. But you're saying, you're saying these launches are so frequent, you need something to rekindle the fire, perhaps. So yeah, they happen a lot, a lot and wait not a lot though right wait how frequent like more than you guys are telling people a lot.

Don't just say a lot how many times a day yeah. It's a lot like they have a counter before you get in through the gate. I think we're at 15. Somebody? 15 launches for the year so far. For this year so far. This week. Here's one thing I would do.

You can see that from a lot of different places. I would probably try to sell tickets. Like if you set up a cool little theater someplace or maybe just some lawn chairs. Open a Burger King franchise nearby. How close can you open a Burger King? Good question. And then sell tickets for parking at the parking lot? Actually, it would be interesting to record for history

how far away you have to build a Burger King from a rocket launch place in case that number changes. But you're not at Johnny Rockets? Right, you could just remember that, you know, it used to be illegal to build Burger King's near Rocket Place. All I'm saying is if I'm an astronaut, I'm on my way to the launch

and I see a window where I could order a burger on my way, that's a good market that no one's capitalizing on. Is the explosion, does it scare you if you don't know it's about to happen? It does actually. They don't tell you? They do, but I delete the emails. Is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this,

is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is this, is to like, oh, is this planned? Everybody is this planned? Is this planned? Is this planned? Is this planned? I mean, as opposed to what? It's really good that I'm not a rocket person because I think that I would probably try to get you fired if I heard that.

If I was like, if I saw you like freak out one time about a rocket launch, everybody around me was like, hell yeah, 337 today, right Mike? Mackie. They did the countdown and everything. Can you not assume that if it was not planned, like here's the thing,

if you've ever flown on an airplane and you start to panic about plane travel, look to the flight attendants and see if they're freaking out or not, right? Yeah, yeah. Hey, hold on, hold on. You sure? Okay.

But now- Just saying. Okay, so two years ago, what I just said is true. out or not right yeah hey hold on you sure okay but now just saying okay so two years ago what I just said it is true but what I'm saying now is this is as if I'm on the plane and I look out the window and the plane starts to leave the ground and the flight attendants go what the fuck is happening is there someone in the office who goes around like, oh boy! Is there someone in the office sort of monitoring enthusiasm from the employee?

The launches? No, no, there's obviously someone like, oh shit, again? Is there someone who's like looking- That was today? There's someone who's like, did you see the launch, Mackie? Like, is anyone making sure that you're as fired up about this as you're supposed to be?

Does that help? It does. I do just, I wanna let you know, Mackie, before you go, that there's a little bit of perspective I'd like to offer, which is that our jobs do not offer us any kind of exclusive rocket launch access. Not exclusive. No, we get to see it with everyone else basically.

So. Until I sell tickets? Until you sell tickets to your Burger King drive-in. Maggie, I'll switch places with you. We'll switch places any day. Yeah. I love my job. Does that help, Maggie?

It does. Thank you so much for coming. You did an amazing job. Hello. Hi there. I'm Benjamin. Hello, Benjamin. Did I say your name weird? You said it amazing job. Hello. Hi there. I'm Benjamin. Hello, Benjamin. Did I say your name weird? You said it perfectly fine. Thank you so much, Benjamin. Benjamin, do not.

Do not suck up to my brother. Benjamin. Hello, Benjamin. Benjamin. My father, and I've learned that your father have very similar tastes in music. So you're saying we have the same father.

Whoa, Benjamin. A twist I didn't see coming. Am I the fourth? Yikes. Could it be? Or am I the fourth? Oh, shit. Oh, wait.

Hmm. If you're going to get it, it'd be great. Please go ahead. My dad loves Chicago the band. Right. Thank you for clarifying. I have recently come to discover that your dad loves Chicago the band. Right. Thank you for clarifying. I have recently come to discover that your dad loves Chicago based on the most recent McElroy family clubhouse.

Fantastic episode, by the way. Thank you. Wow, wow. Thanks. Wow. Thank you. Thank you so much. You'll get your money later, Benjamin.

Thank you so much. Like and subscribe. What a weird place to meet a fan. Wow. Anyway, my dad lives about an hour north of here. I flew down from Vermont just to see you guys. Holy shit. Thank you, Benjamin. So wait, you flew down from Vermont,

but your dad lives an hour north of here. Yeah, we're not super tight. Nice. Okay, you want us- Hey, Benjamin, speak on that. No, no, no, no. Actually, no, because the stakes of this are already super high,

and now they're kind of weirdly super duper high. I don't want to infringe on the- Thank you so much, Benjamin, yeah. But yeah, I want to impress him with a deep cut Chicago the band factoid. All right. And I know your dad's here, so like, whoever comes in.

Clint, yeah. Dad, are you, dad, do you want to come out and drop some? Hi, Matt. I need to talk to you three. Are you, Dad, do you want to come out and drop some? I'm at I need to talk to you three. Can I tell you, it would be wild if with your fake family, you also use the name Clint McElroy and Benjamin was a fan of the podcast and never put that together. OK, dad, Benjamin needs a sick ass Chicago fact. Yeah.

How many you need? Benjamin also watched the most- Hey, hey, hey, can I answer? Hey, can I also stress- It's like three. Three, got it. I'm also gonna stress, when we got this question, I told our dad he was not allowed to do any research

about this, this had to be off the top of the dome. So what dad is about to spit is what dad knows. Also, Benjamin watched the most recent Macro Family Clubhouse and will burn your ass to the ground if you bring anything that you shared. Recycle that old business. Oh, it's gotta be something new. Yeah, about the beach.

Yeah, a new Chicago fact in the last 24 hours. In the album, Chicago 7. If you guys need to go to the bathroom, by the way, this is basically gonna be a little convo between Dad and Benjamin. There was an iron-on transfer of the Chicago logo with a cardinal on it. Yeah, when was the last time you got an album

with an iron-on transfer? Wait, sorry, Dad. Hey, Dad, can I just tell you just a quick director's note? You didn't deliver that like it was the end of the fact. You delivered it like it was a question you were asking Benjamin. Maybe next time the inflection should be, there was a thing with a cardinal on it

instead of there was a thing with a cardinal on it. I've been talking about how we need to, at our live shows shows Have less pressure on ourselves to always be joking like we need to leave We need to leave room to like just talk as people because the energy gets a little like and I am now Second guessing that in a major way. I actually think that impulse is completely wrong. Yeah Sorry, I am talking to your brother. So They were once sued by a bus company. Chicago Transit Authority. They were sued because their original name was Chicago Transit Authority.

They were sued by the actual bus company, Chicago Transit Authority, to change their name, which is why they are known as Chicago. It's weird that the city of Chicago never sued them. Like, what if people are confused and they think you're the city of Chicago? What if people travel to you, the band Chicago? And then try to eat pizza while standing on you? Factoid number two, the original seven number...

Wait, no, no, you've done two already. Don't try to fucking... This is three! I said they said three. I said, they said three. Yes, but this is three. The Cardinal dumb one. Pete Sotero, Robert Lamb, Terry Kath, Danny Serra from Lee Lockname, Walter Pears, ADA, James Pankow. The original seven members of the Funky Wendy City Seven.

And ladies and gentlemen, my boring old dad. And ladies and gentlemen, one more big round of applause. Does that help, Benjamin? Thank you, Benjamin. Thank you, Benjamin. Thanks, Matt. Thank you, Clint. Thank you, Matt.

Man. Hi. Can you imagine how jazz his dad's going to be when he plays that bit for him? Can you believe it? The McElroy brothers talked about you. that he said that he was my dad so yeah also be weird for you Benjamin I'm gonna give you the beginning of this and you can finish it something about pieces there there's something about pet

etc there's something about like you know in his own pet store called pets etc there's something in there you can can use that. It's probably better. This isn't funny, but when you find it, it's gonna be fucking hysterical. Yeah, you're gonna laugh at about two weeks. Hello. Hi. Hey, what's up? Hey, brothers, I'm Charles.

Hi, Charles. Hi, Charles. So I just moved to Florida from Des Moines, Iowa, and I just got a job at a warehouse last month. Right. You sound so surprised, Charles. No, it's shocking. Yeah, it sounds like they called you and said, you're working at a warehouse. No. Right. You sound so surprised, Charles. No, it's shocking. Yeah, it sounds like they called you and said you're working at a warehouse. No, yeah. Did you apply

to this job? I was an independent artist prior to this, so the fact that I got a job at a warehouse is shocking. Okay, cool. You are on Only Farmers. Yeah, that's exactly right. Yeah. So, I work at a coffee roastery and we, uh, a few months before I got hired, we got a machine that packages K cups specifically. And everybody at the warehouse is terrified to use this machine, except for the one person who's allowed to use this machine and they decided that I should be the trainee that learns under them how to use this. All right. So the training that I got was first you push the start button. Yeah. And now you guys know how to use the cake.

Okay, I could go get my license right now. Right now. What's the question? What's your question? The question is, I need to know how to keep kayfabe that this is a scary machine that only I should be allowed to touch because While I was being trained, the person who trained me said push the start button and then started watching wedding crashers on their phone. Fucking hell, man. Now wait, sorry, Charles. Is that an intrinsic part of the process? Charles, is that an intrinsic part of the process? Charles, did they look up from their phone and say, Charles, if you fuck this up for me, I will kill you.

I've been running this griff for 10 years. They say you can watch any movie with Vince Vaughn in it, but if you don't, the machine will explode. Also, don't get it twisted, Fred Claus doesn't count. Fred Claus is weirdly, he doesn't work. And I get this Charles, because K-Cups can't- Wait, wait, wait, what is your question Charles? How do I keep everybody thinking

that this machine is very scary, so only I get to use it? Yeah, sure, cool. Okay, but here's the thing, cause I think K-Cups are inherently scary, cause people are used to tampons and pads, and K-Cups are new. Travis! And- because people are used to tampons and pads and cake cups are new. Travis! And...

Thank you. Woo! Travis! Woo! Travis! Woo! Woo! Woo!

Woo! It's a good joke. I mean, it's a good joke. You gotta go ahead. It kicks ass. It kicks ass. It's a good joke. It's a good joke.

Um, Charles. Does your, how much of a buildup do you think you can sustain before you actually press the button like do you think? 15 minutes of like getting close to it. You're like no, okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no What's the weather outside cloudy fuck? No, he's too high Everybody just shut up. Everybody just shut up for one second. I could do it ready to shut up Let's check the pH For one second I could do it, but just shut up. That's truth and pH.

You're too close, Paul. You're too close, Paul. Can you bring a friend into work under the guise of they now work there, but they only show up one day and then they never show up. And if anyone asks you what happened to them, you'd be like, yeah, man, he fell in the fucking K-cup machine, got turned into K-cups.

Got cupped, bro. Got cupped real hard. Hey, how much of your pinkie do you need? Cool. Hey, I said need. Probably not as much as I think. Yeah, you need one finger for the K-Cup machine button. I know that much. One button to start, another one to start wedding grass. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. This is actually really important, really important. If you press the start button, will it just go forever? Is there some way to stop it? Is there, is it going right now?

So, is there a mannequin of you sitting in the seat? Is there a off? There is an off switch. So why are we freaked about AI? This is my thing. Sorry, go ahead. The machine will stop itself if the lid is off a little bit.

And then you go, oh, I'm sorry. You fix the lid. Now that sounds scary to me. And then you push the start button again. You have to reach deep into the machine to knock the lid in place. It keeps going. So you just have to wait for your opportunity

to reach in real quick and grab it out. Charles, does that help? That super helps there. Thank you, Charles. Thank you. Hello. Hello. How's it going?

I'm pretty nervous. I'm living faster than fear of just being here. So. Yeah. Like, I appreciate you living faster than fear while very clearly wearing a protest shirt for tummy-burying. Yeah.

I will live. Is that why you're nervous because of the bootleg merch? I didn't think you'd see this. I was like, I'm not gonna see it. You didn't think we'd see it? You wrote a question in and then you sat in the spotlight. I'm actually really glad you asked the question because at the beginning of the show,

like before when we did the soundcheck, I said, can we move the light a little bit, because it's like right on that person's face. And they scooted over a little bit, and then it was right in your face. And then you stood up to ask a question, I went, oh, okay. Okay, good.

Hello, how can we help? May I please ask your name? My name is Rosie. Is that better? That was really good. That was kick ass, awesome. Actually Griffin, it was worse. You heard it though, right? I did, I heard that one kick ass. Awesome. Actually, Griffin, it was worse.

You heard it though, right? I did. I heard that one. Okay, but you heard it. The vibe was off. Like even in trying to riff on it, it's like, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. Okay.

Go ahead. This is also kind of about my dad, coincidentally. Kick ass. Wait, what? I didn't mention it in the question. I didn't think you'd choose it, actually. It's a kick ass question, Rosie. Yeah, Rosie. So my dad likes to buy pheasants.

Yeah, we've been there. He lives in Missouri. This is his second pair of pheasants that he's gotten. Hold on, hold on, hold on. You just dropped two things on us really fast with a tone of voice of like, you know, he lives in Missouri, pheasant country, and bought a pair of them. Like you have to do or they'll kill each other.

And can I also say, the second pair of them like you have to do or they'll kill each other and can I also say the second pair of pheasants implies that the first pair went out at the same time? No the first pair is fine they're still there. Okay great. Okay so why not his first quadrangle pair of pheasants? Let's hear Rosie's question. So he got a pair of golden pheasants originally, and then he got really interested in Tragepan pheasants. I don't know if you've seen their mating displays. They're really weird. I thought-

Wait, sorry, Tragepan? Tragepan, I think? I've not seen their mating displays. I've seen a lot of other pheasant mating displays. I thought you said Dragonpan, in fact. Dragonpan I've seen their- go ahead. They're really weird. I thought it was an AI.

Even for pheasant mating displays they were. Yeah. Really? I'm trying to ask, unless it's like yucky. No, it's really cool. They look kind of like aliens. They've got this like multicolored flap that like opens up.

No, sorry. Hey, hey, hey, Rosie. It's weird. Where's the flap? On their like head. Okay, but hold on. No, hold on. Look at it. They do look like an hey, Rosie. It's weird. Where's the flap? On their like head. Okay, but hold on, no, hold on. Look at it.

They do look like an avatar bird. Paul, if you could pull up a picture of a Trakopan pheasant. But... No. No, there's better pictures. Hey, you shot your shot, Paul, it's all good, man. Okay, but we can all agree that just saying in a breeding thing, in a mating ritual,

they open up their flap. That maybe there might be some... These guys look fucking, this picture does not do flap that maybe there might be these guys look fucking this picture does Not do credit to how fucking avatar ass these birds look holy shit I can I say something earnestly for a second I never would have thought that I would have a career that is specifically built to just bring me the world's most fascinating people But I I feel so thrilled to come out here and this is our first show this year I feel so thrilled to come out here and this is our first show this year I feel so thrilled to come out here and meet you absolute maniacs

you're the most fascinating humans on the planet and can I say my favorite thing we haven't even gotten to the actual question so how can we help one of them escape the enclosure male or female the female we have a track of man or the golden the track of hand It's all helps the female's name is the no the females name is winter the male is Vivaldi Yeah, there's another female that they have not named yet I Did they didn't want to go to spring or fall or the other four seasons? Again, my dad is an interesting guy. He loves the ball.

I'd say way more interesting than our dad. He was just out here. Did you hear him? Did you hear me? Just talked about the band Chicago, not cool bird shit. I bet pheasants make cool bird shit. I bet so. What if pheasants, so pheasants.

Yeah. Right? That's fucking crazy! Imagine the stumbling on that shit. He looks like the spitter dinosaur that killed Wayne Knight. Or like a cool rave vagina. Travis? Travis.

I'm saying if you saw that... How dare you say what Griffin was thinking. You'd stand all eyes here. No, no, hold on. What's a, no, hold on. What's a rave vagina, Travis? What the fuck does that mean, Travis? If you saw a vagina under a black light. Travis, that's...

Yeah. Get that gone. Get that gone. So, uh. My face hurts. You need help. What do you want? What do you want? Like what do you want? You destroyed our family. Look at that shit.

That's crazy. What do you want? Why do you want this to come back? You just want this to be away from you. This is somebody painting this mural on the wall of a library. And you're like, I'm gonna go and get this. I'm gonna go you want this to come back? You just want this to be away from you. This is somebody painted this mural

on the wall of a laser tag blaze, and the boss is like, I think I need to fire him because I think that's a vagina. I need that. That's a burn. It's how tired it is. It probably got stolen by an insane wizard.

Yeah. Like look at it. It's incredible. What's the question? What do you want? How do you kill it? No. It's weak spot, just look! It's the purple!

Need some tips on how to catch it? Okay. Oh yeah. So what is a better... Hey can I just say when I look at that bird don't look fast. Or it looks extremely fucking fast. It's either one of the two. Yeah, you actually don't get to look that stupid

and be slow at the same time. Can your dad get his hands on some space mushrooms? Cause that's the diet of this guy, I bet. What you're going to want is a varied environment that'll appeal to a pheasant. So you're gonna wanna put out some grain, some sorghum, some wheat. Did you look up pheasant shit backstage?

So I did, but then... then I got on TikTok. Yeah. So I have burnt through what I remember. Justin, could you recreate some pheasant calls? Travis, let me finish. Some pheasant calls for us? That was him clearing his throat.

You guys, if you laugh during it, you can mess it up. This is something that Josie can play on their phone. Yeah, play it on your phone. Just record it. Pheasants are easily spooked. Please stay absolutely silent while my brother does pheasant calls. that Josie can play on their phone. Yeah, play it on your phone, she's recorded. Pheasants are easily spooked. Please stay absolutely silent while my brother does pheasant calls he learned on TikTok. Please be quiet.

Get ready to record. Quack, quack. Shut up. Shut up! Quack. Quack. Quack. Quack.

There you go. Does that help? Yes, I will play these for my dad. Thank you, thank you. Play those for your dad, he's going to love them. Tell your dad he owes me $20 on OnlyFans. Whoa. Thank you. You can bring the lights down.

Hey, Tampa, you've been such a lot of fun. This is our first show of 2025 of 20th Thunder Drive. You all have been fucking incredible. You're amazing. Thank you. This is our first show of 2025 of 20th Thunder Drive. You all have been fucking incredible. You're amazing. Thank you so much. I'm waiting an appropriate amount of time for Paul to get back to the table to talk about Maddie's posters whenever Paul's ready. Can we go to the poster, Paul?

There it is. So much. There's our poster. Maddie Lundquist. Grab one of those. If there's any left, we signed a whole bunch of them. There's also coins out there. All proceeds from these coins go to Feeding Tampa Bay. It's a beautiful double-sided, no matter which theme you've really resonated with

this year at Gotcha. And if you don't already have tickets, we're gonna be here tomorrow night as well doing the Adventure Zone, doing Taz versus Romeo versus Juliet. It's gonna be a fun time. Thank you to Montaigne for the use of our theme song, My Life is Better with You. It is a fantastic track.

We're so grateful to be able to use it. And, yeah, we have a Faster Than Fear. This is going to be our first line faster than fear. And I think because of the outfit Griffin is wearing and the character discussed in the thing and maybe what he might be if you squint your eyes or a minute, What are you talking about?

that Griffin should read this question. Maybe Justin and I will quietly vroom, vroom, vroom. Yeah. Vroom, vroom, vroom. That's not what cars say. You will practice this, but that's not what cars say. Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom. That's not what cars say. You will practice this, but that's not what cars say. This year I'm going to be faster than my fear of the Kool-Aid man. My name is Justin McElroy.

I'm Travis McElroy. Griffin McElroy. My brother, my brother. May kiss your dad square on the lips! Ah, it's better, it's better with two by one Ah, it's better with you