My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 764: Sneak a Pi in that Mobo

Episode Date: May 26, 2025

You’ll get the sacred gems if you solve this riddle! One of the brothers always is funny, one of the brothers is always picking locks, and one of the brothers is a pirate cosplayer. Okay, they’re actually dragon-grilled mozzarella sticks, not gems. And we can’t actually guarantee you’ll get them, but you might! Maybe. If the dragon is willing to share.Suggested talking points: Subcutaneous Garage, More Toon Than Man, Free Giraffe Looks, Carrots on Pizza is an Affront to God, Trucknutz and GronkCenter for Reproductive Rights: https://reproductiverights.org/

The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? One, two, three, four! It's the start of something beautiful A small acquaintance has blossomed It's ripened into a precious friendship

I could've never seen what was coming for me Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach My life, it feels like Life, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with you My life, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with you This is true, ah ah ah

It's better, it's better with two My life, ah ah ah It's better, it's better with two By way of Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, baby, it's me, Griffin McElroy, built Ford Tough, start your engines, time to race. Speaking of car stuff, beauty blog it, that's what's inside of a garage door opener. Justin's been so cool lately, Travis, are you getting these Mr. Robot vibes from this dude? Yeah, Justin's been biohacking. Justin's been biohacking, he put a garage door opener

under some subcutaneous folds. I had this chip, I had this installed actually. Yeah. This is an implant. And that's fucking cool. So open and close your garage. Yeah. No, it open and closes my mouth.

Rawr. Stop it, cool fish. Oh, you didn't need that. Tell me about some of your other sort of like remote control bio, biomods that you've got going on. Well, here, my remote control bio-mods, well, I had the icons put in so they can pop out whenever I see a beautiful lady and it says, Aruga!

Nice. And I had the trumpet mouth put in. Yeah, so how much did that cost you? What? How much did it cost? Well, he did it himself. I'll tell you the truth, Travis, $300 a day. Every time a dame strolls by-

Oh, it's per game. Cause it's a CO2 cartridge. Oh, you gotta reload it Travis, $300 a day. Every time a dame strolls by. Oh, it's game. Cause it's a CO2 cartridge. Oh, you gotta reload it. It's like airbags. It launches pistons from his eyes. Do you need to get your eyes reset back in every time? Well, do you remember dad's friend Lee that used to work at Pearl Vision

at the Charleston Town Center? He did. He just puts him back in for me like a mob doctor. He'd just go to his house and he just scoots him back in for $38 and I have to help him reprogram his security. He did my, he does my procedures where it makes my mouth, my jaw fall all the way down to the floor and my tongue unrolls like a rug anytime I see a babe.

Yeah. And he like focuses I guess only on like on like, sort of like babe, spotting, bio-mode. No, he helps me, if someone offers me a bunch of money, my eyes roll around like a slot machine and then comes up dollar sign, dollar sign. He'll reset that back to where I can see again. That's cool. But that's not, that wasn't a bio-mod,

that was a tattoo of a dollar sign I got on the back of my eyeballs and then I trained really hard to be able to spin around when you see money. This Ink Fiend is more, this Ink Fiend has had so many jobs done, he's more tuned than man! And then it's like,

it's like you've gotten so many things done, you've got the big flat hand, like somebody just drove over in a steamroller. Do you remember, Trapp, when we had to stage that intervention because of how big an ink fiend Justin had become and was becoming more Toon than man? And it was problematic because during the intervention,

he walked over to the sandwich table and he stacked them all up into one big sandwich and then opened his jaw all the way and ate the sandwich in one bite. Why were we reading the letters about how his Toon man behavior was affecting us? And his cheeks stuck out and made the shape of a sandwich. I remember that and I think that's probably,

and he started crying then, I think that's when he realized he had taken things too far. Yeah. And he left the toothpick in. Yeah. If you look at a resistor, there's colored bands around it that tell you what kind of resistor it is. And if you understand the code, you can know what kind of resistor you're looking at.

Can you imagine what kind of party trick? I'm resisting this right now, Justin. I'm resisting this right now. You should open up to it because I think it's cool that Justin's learning about the secrets of how the world works in technology. Well, where are we at on this? Because you were just saying intervention

and now you're like, I actually like this and it's cool. Where are we at? I feel like sometimes Griffin just says whatever he thinks is funniest. That's true, but I left the cartoon analogy behind. I love having Techno Justin. Like I love, I love. I mean, yeah, we all love Techno Justin.

Well, no, it doesn't sound like it. You just said you're resisting Techno Justin. I'm fully embracing him and I'm saying hack it, mod it, buy it, fix it, chop it, screw it. Now I love Gra- Just like Griffin only says things when they're funny, I say things to make people like me and I thought Griffin was gonna agree with me and then he didn't, so I'll tell him my real truth.

That must have been really, really, really, really hard. That must have been really tough, and I'm proud of you for getting through it. It was, thank you so much. I only speak the truth, that's my thing as a brother, and I'll tell you, I'm an hour seven of Lake Washington Technical College's LEC 102 course, presented by Professor Joe,

and it is, I am learning so much, Travis. And I will say also, Sydney is learning so much. Oh, wow. And she's loving that. And I have so many opportunities in our day-to-day life to relate to her things that I, like, she'll say, will you hand me a battery? And I'll say, oh, you know what?

Actually, that AA is not a battery, it's actually a cell, which would be, a battery would be a group and then she leaves. And she's gone. Yeah. Well, probably because, you know, I think maybe Dr. Sidney McElroy is afraid of having any practical knowledge.

Yeah. That's the problem. Yeah, true, that's the problem. It's all flights of flibberti gibbets with her. Yeah, sure. Yeah, she's just not the grounded sort like me. I'm just glad that here, 764 episodes in, we finally laid out the rules of the riddle,

where Griffin's the brother who always says something funny, I'm the brother who always says something to make people like them, and Justin always speaks the truth. Now you get to ask us one question to see if you can move on through the dungeon. One of us has the gems. One of us is immaculate in his word, and it's me. And I'll give you a gem if you can move on through the dungeon. One of us has the gems. One of us is immaculate in his word and it's me. And I'll give you a gem if you want.

Do you want a gem? Would that make you happy? He says that, but can you even? I don't even know, man. They want you to not know how to fix your own electronics. This is what I'm saying. Who's they? They, they want you to not know how to fix it.

But if you get in there, in the guts, unplug it, you know, when you get there in the guts. Wait, I'm writing this down, hold on. Unplug it, write that down, ass, then find new brother who's more tolerant of your hijinks. Okay, yeah. And then get in there and get in the guts and fix it. Fix it yourself.

Have you had a shaking humility moment yet? Because I got into modifying like game consoles, old game consoles, mostly as a flippity gibbet during COVID, a COVID flippity gibbet. And then one time my lamp on my bedside table started to flicker and Rachel was like, that's been doing that a lot lately. I don't know what's going on.

We might need to replace it. And I was like, I'll just fix it. And then she was like, that probably won't happen. I was like, don't worry about it. And then I took the wire out of it and I was like, oh, I don't know. This isn't a Game Boy, fuck. Where's the motherboard?

It's a lamp, fuck. Okay. That happened to me when it, because I took a lot of black- Cause I don't want you to fix it. I took a lot of blacksmithing classes during COVID. And then I was out on the street walking with my wife with a parasol

when a horse threw a shoe. Yeah. And then they were like, oh, we need a new one of these. And I'm like, oh, you got it. Yeah. Sure. And then I didn't have any of the tools or knowledge or skills.

They don't want you to reshot your own horse. They don't want that. They want you to go to Fire Horse. Is this the same they as the technology people as the horse people or? I mean, eventually, yeah, Griffin. It was a technology at some point, you understand. Justin, at some point horses pulling something

blew someone's mind. Is the they you're talking about, like the developers of like Civ games and the technology tree that they make that you have to like research each one? Okay, Travis, here. You know, you know you, right? You know your family and friends. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Now, you know everybody else that you see walking around, right? Yeah. That's us. Okay? And then they-

Anyone you've never seen or met before is your enemy. That is evil and pulling the strings. Oh, okay. They, capitalism. Capitalism. Oh, capitalism. Capitalism. Capitalism doesn't want you to fix your own stuff.

Doesn't want you to fix it. Doesn't want you to throw it in the landfill. Look at this. Do you know how, listen, I'm down to five pieces of this garage door opener that I have. I'm closer than ever. Fuck yeah, man. One of these days you're gonna take apart one of-

I lost one of them, I probably didn't need that one. But you know. No, that's cruff. You're gonna take apart a gadget one of these days, inside you're gonna find the secret you need to destroy the government. This is surprising. They leave all these parts like buttons, like this case. I don't want any I want this Yeah, you know what I just want a little chip. I want you want that fragile vulnerable chip Give me that cyber that garage door openers way too big it needs to just be the cyber and a single little input That's all we need. I don't need a case for my PC all the parts just sit on the floor

Yeah, all this wasted PCB right here. Carve all this off. I'm gonna get in there, drill it down. That's a perfectly second, good second mobo right there, partner. This is great, Justin. I can get a pie in there. Get a 20-40.

Sneak a pie in that mobo. You've really, you've seized the means of opening and closing your garage door, and I respect that immensely. Don't try to hide a mobo from Justin. He will get it. He will shuck. He'll find that mobo. He will shuck whatever. That's my one, get one free? No. Listen, when the robots come for us,

if you need a human who hasn't lost the knowledge of how to get a calendar from a small computer onto a large TV display, I will be right there ready to hack that in, no problem. Or if your dad just needs help setting it up, ask Justin. Are you gonna rebuild the remote, the garage door opener or what's the plan here? You saw it right, I have absolutely no plan.

I know. So you're like Jason Bourne taking apart his M16 rifle or whatever and he sets it on the bed and then his handler's like, good, now rebuild it. And he's like, I don't, are you kidding me? I didn't keep track of how it came apart. Look at that, dude. I dropped one of the fucking things on the floor,

like that's gone, I really broke this good. Do you have one that's already together that I can look at so I get kind of an idea of where what goes or? Yeah. So maybe schematics? Hey, how about we do some advice? That's a lot of tech you got jangling around in there.

I moved it all out of reach or else I'm gonna be fiddling with it. You've got to. The solution will come to me at some point. I got into lock picking during COVID. I bought a little lock pick practice lock and there were a lot of times where I was working and also picking locks just out of the camera's eyesight. I'm doing it right now.

Yeah, cool. You'll never know. Yeah, cool. You'll never know. Am I? Hey Griffin, where'd you go with that? I mean, the same place I went with hard candy making and retro game console modifying, which is that I had a second child

and stopped fucking all of it. All of it's gone. All of it's done. Yeah, this is an advice show. So we're going to take your questions and turn the Malcolm and Ike into wisdom. This is the first one. The train I take to work every morning

passes the local zoo, specifically the giraffe enclosure. All spring, my absolute favorite part of my long commute has been getting a glimpse at these amazing long neck fellas. However, as the foliage has grown, I believe they added new trees, my view of the giraffes is fully obscured and I've been robbed of my daily moment of joy. How do I get the zoo to trim its trees

or perhaps to cut out a little window for train passengers to see the animals through, but for a second, as from must-see mammals on the mass. Your complaint is that they're not giving away their product for free and just bleeding money You're sampling it every day having free giraffe looks. That's all they have literally the only product They have on offer is draft look they've got stuffies, corn dogs, and they have, look at a giraffe. That's all they do. They have annoyingly large lollipops

that your kids will have finished and leave stuck somewhere. Yeah. Giraffe is also like one of the five or six animals at the zoo that's like, you came to see this one, right? Yeah. Yeah, here's a whole,

we built a whole house full of bugs and snakes or whatever. And you're like, cool. I'll tell you what the problem is. What? Giraffes are supposed to be eating the leaves on the trees. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Why aren't they doing it?

Maybe you need to. Because you don't want you to look at them. This is gonna be hard, but you're gonna have to buy a ticket to the zoo. And you're, I know, I know, listen, I know. But then you're gonna have to go maybe coach these giraffes on like maybe, oh, look, oh, look know. But then you're gonna have to go maybe coach these giraffes on like maybe, oh, look at those leaves over there.

Look how good they look. Cause if they were seeing the giraffes, the giraffes can reach it. Giraffes eat the leaves on the top of the trees. That's why they stretch their necks out so hard and so long. And so why aren't they eating that? Maybe go and trim leaves lower down. Okay, let's flip a perspective.

You're a giraffe. You go to the zoo meeting and you say, hey, I have to see train every day. Yes. And I'm trying to pretend that I live in the jungle. That's a good point. Okay? Or the savanna or what have you.

I would like- Where they live. It's very hard to- Yeah, where I live. Wherever they're at. You know my general thing, right? It's one of the trees ones, probably. I would like- Where they live. Yeah, wherever they're at. You know my general thing, right? It's one of the trees ones, probably. And I don't think it's just one place,

so maybe, I don't know, we can walk, so who knows where you see us. I was raised in a zoo. I never got a chance to know these things. I'm voiced by David Schwimmer, calm down. My accent's a little off from the other giraffes. All right, sorry, I was raised in captivity. I think you do, there is a,

you're gonna need to get started on an elaborate heist. But it's like, instead of stealing something, you're gonna be doing a little bit of pruning. You're gonna need to roll up to this place with a little, some big clippers or chainsaw, depending on the thickness of these trees. Actually, if someone spots you climbing into the giraffe exhibit with a chainsaw,

they're gonna assume. There's some assumptions might be made. They're gonna assume, God didn't want them to be this tall! No, man, you got to. That horse was built wrong! Come on down here, big fella! You think you're so tough?

The good news with Tree Heist, Operation Tree Heist, is if you do get caught, you have an amazing exit strategy of you slide down the giraffe's neck. Of course. Like a Fred Flintstone. That is, we've all thought it. What a wonderful, wonderful angle they provide. I could really zoom down one of those hairy necks.

It must be hard for a giraffe to, I assume, want to be ridden like a horse. They're jealous, but no one can reach it. It's not ergonomically designed to mount. You know what I mean? And the giraffe would love it if somebody just hopped on and rode it. Here's my theory of evolution.

Giraffes evolved from horses, and they were just the horses that, whenever humans would be like, time to ride, they'd be like, oh, I really not feeling it. Let me just scoot up. Tiptoes, tiptoes. Tiptoes, tiptoes, they stretch up.

Now you can't get up there. And it just makes sense. It just makes sense. I'm a delivery driver. Most of my stops are businesses. It's not uncommon for there to be a pizza party happening at said business when I arrive. Sometimes they offer me a slice,

which is always appreciated. However, sometimes they don't, which I find quite rude if I'm being honest. Brothers, how do I get in on that hot za these parties have not offered? Do I ask them? What if they say no? Do I just grab a slice when no one's looking?

Please help me, I'm so hungry for pizza. That's from Pizza Party Pirate in Rochester. Hmm. Hmm. Is this pizza for everybody or just the ones who close the account or where you are? Or employees or people you know.

Employees or strangers. Just Dave over there, where we at on the pizza availability. Pizza is one of those loaves and fishes type things where it wouldn't ever occur to you, I think, to eat some beef medallions. You know what I mean? Like if there was some leftover beef medallions and asparagus tips, you wouldn't think

I'm gonna fix me a plate. But there is something about pizza where it does feel communal almost as soon as it's prepared. Sure. And frankly, no one ever calculates perfectly the amount of pizza that's needed per person anyways. So either it was already gonna run out before everybody got their fill

or there was gonna be too much left, right? If there's too much left, you should give the delivery driver some. And if it was gonna run out before everybody got their fill or there was gonna be too much left, right? If there's too much left, you should give the delivery driver some. And if it was gonna run out too early anyways, give it to the delivery driver. Statistically insignificant, a single slice of pizza. Slide it on down.

I would be bummed if my pizza arrived and there was a piece already eaten. If the request was made, hey, let me get down on this. Absolutely, for sure. It's one slice. Who cares, man? No problem. No problem, it's a single slice.

Unless the delivery driver is like the second person to the pizza party, right? Like everybody's there. If anybody's so late that they didn't get a piece of pizza, sometimes we have to be reminded that there are consequences to our decision. And if I come in and I'm like 20 minutes late to the pizza party and I'm like,

you guys didn't save me a slice. And I look over and the delivery driver is eating one. And I'm like, what the hell? And they're like, you were 20 minutes late to the pizza party. That's tough though, because you don't wanna be the person who's like, go on man, get in there.

And then everybody else comes down. It's like, I'm so sorry. I thought you got in there already. I'm so sorry. Well, no, I'm not sorry. I thought you got in there already. I'm so sorry. Well, no, I'm not sorry. Don't be late next time. If you are a delivery driver of two. They had a project.

They were trying to get done and the boss was telling them if they didn't get it done, they were out of here. No excuses. No excuses. They need this job. If you are a delivery driver and you roll up to a function where you're gonna be catering and the vibe is off, you are endowed certain rights in that scenario and some of it is the pizza

that you are delivering. Are we supposing that we are agreed in this that the person asking the question is not delivering the pizza in question, right? I assumed that's exactly what we're talking about. I thought you two were talking at cross purposes. I wanted to clarify this. Okay, so let me get this straight Travis,

in your imagination, this delivery driver is stopping by to drop off unrelated lunch items to a place that has already had pizza delivered to their door. Well yes Griffin, here's why I think that, because it's what it god damn says in the question. Let's see what the tech support's going Travis I'm a delivery driver. Most my stops are businesses It's not uncommon for there to be a pizza party happening at said business when I arrive

Yeah, let's speak now We're arguing fucking semantics now We're not they're having a pizza party and the party arguing semantics now. We're not! They're having a pizza party, and the party- This holster's arguing semantics, please go on. The party is going, the party is popping. One little, the catalyst for setting off this party powder keg hasn't showed up yet. That's you with the za.

The pizza party's already happening. Why are you delivering food to a place full of pizza? Griffin, reality. Griffin, you're enormously wrong, and I do want you to keep digging. So what you're saying is that sometimes it's a pizza party and sometimes it's just a pizza in the context of this question?

No, sometimes it's just, if I have people over to have a pizza party, come on over to my place tonight, gang. We're watching- For a pizza party! Come on over, we're watching Andor. Have a couple slices. It's gonna be a fucking- They didn't eat Andor.

Stop selling. They heard pizza party, they're coming over. It's gonna be a time. We're gonna have a time. Now what's the other option? Let me please finish the first option. Okay, please, yes, please. There is no second option.

There is merely this hypothetical situation that's gonna take your guys' shit apart. We're having a pizza party tonight, gang. Come on over. We're gonna watch all of Andor, and we're gonna have a couple slices. My six best friends show up. We're at the house, and we're having the time of our lives.

But what, the pizza's running a little bit late. What are we having right now? What is the moment that we're in right now? What is this event that we're, what was on the Facebook invite right now? What are we in? The pizza party. A pizza party, uh-huh.

Yeah. The pizza's not there yet, but that doesn't change the central thesis, that doesn't change the central thesis of what the gathering's all about. But the question says it's not uncommon for there to be a pizza party happening. So what you're saying, Question Asker doesn't say, I'm there to be a pizza party happening. So what you're saying, the question asker doesn't say,

I'm delivering pizzas to a pizza party. So that means that there is other uncommon events or maybe the more common event of I'm bringing, what, eight pizzas in and a pizza party is not happening. Dave's just real fucking peckish that day. The fact that you said- I think the essential question that Griffin has to answer is this,

and this is where I actually don't have an answer. Oh, Juice, you've chosen your side in this division. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, to my hypothetical, I don't have an answer. Could you have a pizza party where the pizza does not arrive and it is still a pizza party? No. If the pizza doesn not arrive and it is still a pizza party? No.

If the pizza doesn't arrive, it's a failed pizza party. It's a gathering. So I would argue you're not having a pizza party until the pizza arrives, because you cannot both be having a pizza party and then in hindsight not have had a pizza party. You were classifying it in hindsight as not a pizza party because the pizza never arrived.

If the pizza arrives 30 minutes late, you're gonna look back at that whole event at all the memories that you formed, Ryan, and you're gonna say that whole thing was a fucking pizza party. Do you understand what I'm saying? There's no way that I as a, okay, but there's no way that I as a delivery driver

of pizzas. in thinking, obviously I have a bias that the pizza party don't start till I walk in. Yes. Right? Yeah. So wouldn't that embolden you to get a sweet slice? No, but I wouldn't state it in the question that a pizza party is going on when I arrive,

because from my point of view, the pizza party cannot begin until when I arrive. Because from my point of view, the pizza party cannot begin until I have arrived. So I wouldn't say a pizza party happening at said business when I arrive, because I'm the pizza delivery driver. Unless I'm not, I'm a different delivery driver. Please, I know people are getting frustrated. This is so important.

What we're doing here is always important. Obviously the most important, it's science. But if we don't know the answer to this, I do not know how to guide this person. I simply don't. And I do, I may be in the wrong here. I've been outvoted. I'm happy to concede the position,

but I'm saying a little bit of clarity of language. Maybe we get a follow-up email. I would love for this to be resolved peaceably. And I think a little bit of grace on my part. I think a little bit of grace on everyone's part. A little grace. I mean, don't get me wrong, there's two of you and one of me,

so if I'm right, it's gonna be double good, it's gonna feel double fucking good. Okay. But I will still be like pretty chill about it. And listen, question asked here, ask for a slice of that pizza, the weird pizza that they ordered for one person who had a bunch of special requests

and no one else is gonna eat it and they're gonna end up throwing most of it away anyways. They can spare a slice of that one. Yeah, I can't. Do you know what my new thing is when I have a large group of people that I'm trying to buy pizza for, and this has happened quite a lot recently,

and everyone is saying they like all kinds of pizza. You're not helping me. I wanna give you the pizza of your dreams. Please, a little guidance. My joy, when we're on tour and we get pizza and Rachel's there and Rachel is like all veggies. And it feels like a mini game that I'm winning where I can just add every veggie on the menu

and the pizza place is gonna be so impressed. It feels like a mini game that I'm winning where I can just add every veggie on the menu and the pizza place is gonna be so impressed. But it's like, nobody ever orders these. This is great. And I'm just like, yeah, throw alfalfa sprouts on there. Carrot coins, yeah, go for it. She loves these things. And it feels like I'm winning a game.

Hey, guys, if I can be so bold, why don't we head on over to the Money Zone? I respect that. Yeah, please. You know, Trav, a great way to get started with your project that you were telling me about would be a website. Oh yeah! I know, I know what you were telling me that you thought that there was no way you could ever figure it out. And I told you-

Figure out my project? Yeah. Well, which one was I telling you about, because I have so many project ideas bouncing around all the time. The candle one. And you were saying that- The what?

The candle one. Oh yeah. And you were saying you could never build a candle website. And I said, maybe Trav, you should believe in yourself. I meant to be clear. What I meant by that, believe in yourself, was you should use Squarespace. Now, do you remember specifically

which candle project I was telling you about? Cause I have so many candle ideas. I do remember it was Travis McRoy's Eatin' Candles. And- Oh, right, right, right. Multi-purpose candles, you can- They were the fully edible, non-digestible candle that the whole family would love to smell and tolerate the taste. And they don't taste good.

No. No. And you had the tagline cooked up, which looked great as a header on a Squarespace website that was like, smell them or eat them, I don't give a shit. Yeah, here's the best part. I'm gonna put non-toxic on them, but it's spelled like the bread, like non.

Yeah, cool. And like the words, there will be hyphenated or anything like that. And then when people are like, yeah, this came out guy really sick. I'm like, it says toxic. Yeah, I was about to say that Squarespace would prefer you not do immoral things with your website,

but you know what? Squarespace is probably not in the business of judging morality. I don't think Squarespace wants to be a referee for all the world's problems, you know? I think they just wanna get some world-class designers, have them make some of the best templates in the world problems, you know? I think they just wanna get some world-class designers, have them make some of the best templates in the world, and let you put your photos and the stuff you wanna sell

and your videos and your text and all that stuff into the templates and give yourself a real professional-looking website. Edible candles? There's a question mark on it too, which helps. Yeah. Head to squarespace.com slash mybrother for a free trial, and when you're ready to launch,

use offer code my brother to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Hey Griffin, I've been wondering, did you know that Fast-Growing Trees is the biggest online nursery in the US with thousands of different plans and over 2 million happy customers? Yeah, dude. Oh, cool.

Did you know that I'm one of those happy customers? I didn't. Oh. I felt like you should keep track of the things happening in my life. Little bear cubs, yeah. I got a redbud tree for them, which I planted in my front yard, which is thriving.

And I got myself a little Meyer lemon tree that I'm growing in my office. It's a real beaut. The children are thrilled to have lemons in like two or three years. I don't know how long it takes to make lemons, but I'm gonna make lemonade because Fast Growing Trees sold me a lemon tree

and I'm very happy with it. And they have like different kinds of plants, not just trees, but stuff you can plant in your yard, plant inside your home, privacy trees. I came up with this slogan, they won't sell you a lemon unless you ask them to. That's cool.

That's almost as good as Smell'em or Eat'em, I don't give a shit. Yeah. Thank you. Fair. Thanks very much. And you can get support from plant experts who are on call to help you with everything you're trying to figure out with the plant.

I highly recommend. They really do it. They really do it. Yeah. I highly recommend. I'm not just the spokesman. I'm also a client and you can be too. This spring, they have the best deals for your yard, up to half off on select plants

and other deals and listeners to our show get 15% off their first purchase. When using the code, myOTHER at checkout, all one word. Now the perfect time to plan, use MYBROTHER to save today, offer is valid for a limited time, terms and conditions may apply. I work as a hostess at a historic pirate restaurant in Savannah, Georgia. At the restaurant, we have pirates on duty

who explain our history to guests and give tours of the building. Real pirates used to come here in the 1700s. It's actually pretty cool. Yeah, you don't have to convince us. Yeah, I'm on board. These tour guides obviously get to dress like pirates while I, as a host, wear a simple black shirt

and black dress pants. My question is, how can I introduce the idea of my boss to my boss, possibly letting me dress like a pirate too? Maybe not every day, but sometimes at least. I love Renaissance Fairest, and would very much appreciate being able to carry some of that whimsy to the monotony of regular life. Hmm.

Hmm. Who's that from? That's from Pirate Envy in Savannah, Georgia. I think that this is a question of where does the pirate experience begin? Hmm. Because it sounds like it begins beyond the- At conception.

Stand. Oh, so, okay. The pirate experience begins at conception. For the pirate, I get, the pirate's experience. Are you trying to say pirates are born not made, Travis? Is that your, okay. When two pirates love each other very much. Uh-huh.

Recessive pirate genius. Yeah, the instant that they climax, that's when the pirates, that is the exact moment that God has endowed that pirate with their soul. When they yell, Varshy blows, then you know. Yeah, man, yeah. When they're great harpoon, I don't wanna do this anymore.

I don't blame you, I don't blame you. We're talking about stretching the perimeter of the pirate immersion another 20, 30 feet, just put some fucking barrels outside of the door and like a sail and have some shanties playing in the parking lot. And then by the time they roll up, they're already in pirate mode. It's not weird that there's a pirate working

at the host stand. I think that it is weird because I want the romance of piracy. I think that it is weird because I want the romance of piracy. I want the illusion. I don't want to see pirates rolling silverware. I don't want to see pirates helping people to their table or writing down my name.

I don't want a pirate to do any of that. I want that to be regular people. I need a pirate to just be a dramatic figure, waltzing in, taking orders, you know. Wait, sorry, the pirate's taking your dinner order though. Yes, that's like, cause I'm on their boat, I think in the fiction.

That's so wild, man. It's so wild to me that you're saying, I can't have a pirate show me to my table, but I will ask a pirate for the wine list. It actually, can I say, Griffin is right. This person should say the waiters can't be pirates anymore. I don't think the waiters are pirates. What is up with you guys at reading comprehension today?

There's pirates on duty that give tours, and there was no mention of waiters or servers or nothing. This is a good point. This is a good point, Travis. When you go to the fucking Epcot Garden Grill It's not like there's 60 chips and dales like the roast beef is really good Excuse me for a living that I assume in this economy restaurants can't just have idle pirates walking around Yeah, you're gonna put him to work

There's a tour guide and the bathroom attendant. This restaurant has so much excess head count, I don't do anything with the fucking, you work at a restaurant? Wow, you should make me dinner sometime. No, you don't understand. I'm a historical pirate, cosplayer, role player. I'm kinda like the guy that dances

in the Mighty Money Ballstones. Yeah. So it's like. Yeah, I think this has gotta be an everyone dresses like a pirate or no one dresses like a pirate. You could slowly introduce, like over time, pirate accessories to your work and pirate things and just like slowly add them on until you just do dress

like a pirate and it's like, yeah, you know, if you had asked me straight up, I would have said, no, that'd be weird. But now that I've seen you with like the bird and the Cutlass and the eye patch and the bandana. I will say this, Cutlass should be last. That's the hardest. Not first, God, no, not first.

Cutlass before flintlock, but then you're done. After Cutlass, flintlock, and like parrot is actually pretty late, honestly. That is a health code issue. I think you start with boots that kind of fold over on top and maybe are a little floppy. If I walked in- You start with that, that might be style.

Your boss doesn't know. Yes, I think that's a good, maybe don't do weapons, because if I walked into a restaurant and the host had a gun, no matter how antiquated it may be, I'm still not gonna feel like especially comfortable. Well, I do like that thing in movies and TV shows sometimes where like a bartender will have a weapon

like up over the bar, like a baseball bat or whatever to let me know that if stuff goes down, they've got a baseball bat. You could do something like that. A cutlass on the wall behind your host stand. Okay, but we're talking decor, oh, okay, so a cutlass just on the host stand at all times, just so people know.

That's better than in some movies when the bartender pulls out a shotgun they had underneath the bar. I always think like, God, that's stressful. Yeah. Can you imagine? That's your day to day? And you keep a lot of other stuff under there. I'm reaching in there to get the cherries for a drink

and my hand brushes the shotgun? I'm gonna panic every time. Like if someone's like, can I bring my dog in here? It's like, oh man, please don't. I don't think so. My son Tucker loves those maraschino cherries. Yeah, he can't fucking come back here, man. But you have all the little umbrellas and stuff?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is a gun area. This is a place for cutlasses. No. But you have all the little umbrellas and stuff. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is a gun area. Yes. This is a place for cutlasses. No, don't order drinks over here. Scoot four feet to the right to order your drinks. Why can't I order them here? It's not safe.

It's just not safe. It's just not safe for you. Ba-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la- I want a Munch Squad! I want two Munch Squad! Welcome to Munch Squad, it's a podcast another podcast profiling the latest and greatest in brand eating and guys I have such good news for you. What? Burger King is going to release a menu celebrating the new How to Train Your Dragon movie.

Yay! Fuck yeah. Now, Trav, I know that you're a, you appreciate this franchise. Thank you. So I wanted to run through the items with you to see how you, a fan, feel about the menu that is coming along here.

Because Griffin and I don't have the familiarity with the franchise. So, Calling All Dragon Trainers. I'm guessing, is that a title? Well, it's right there in the name of the movie. So a dragon trainer is just any of the people who train the different dragons there? Well, eventually, yeah, Justin. There's a whole storyline.

Yeah, they got names like Funk Nuts and like all kinds of wild shit. Yeah. Burger King in co-promotion with the new live action, How to Train Your Dragon film. Oh, I'm glad they clarified they weren't just doing it solo. Solo! Hey, listen, we haven't reached out to them,

but we're huge fans. Love this shit. They invite guests to take a trip to the Isle of Berk. That's it got cut off. No, that's it. Isle of What? Berk. That's just the name. Oh, that's the whole thing. That's why I'm saying man everything in this movie is like Gronk. Four dragon inspired takes on fan favorite media. No, it's saying Gronk. Chug. Chug ball. Like everything in this movie has a- Wait, so you have seen the movie, Griffin. Just saying, just come up with some normal names. Available starting Tuesday, May 27th,

the new lineup was developed to help BK and How to Train Your Dragon fans alike celebrate the release of the new film, which soars into theaters on Friday, June 13th. Okay. As the home of the flame grilled Whopper, Burger King is no stranger to fire. Huh.

And reimagining America's most iconic burger. That's why BK is inviting guests to take their taste buds on a bold and flavorful journey with the adventurous new menu offerings, including the... Okay, now, Trav, this is where you're gonna have to help me because I don't... The dragon flame grilled Whopper. You know what? I actually have an image,

so let me share with you guys, because I feel like the, don't jump ahead of me please, but. Oh, okay. The Dragon Flame Grilled Whopper, the star of the show features a quarter pound of flame grilled beef, served on a red and orange marbled bun,

colored with natural spices and vegetables. Oh, okay. Topped with American cheese, crispy bacon, tomatoes, lettuce, onions, pickles, ketchup, and mayo. Woo! This, um... What are you, compensating guys? Come on.

That burger is the first ham burger I've ever seen that was perfectly spherical. That beautiful- It looks like it was drawn by God's compass. It looks like a billiard ball, this beautiful, perfect hamburger. Now, Justin, if I may, to understand the question you're asking, this burger is-

Does it remind you of any of the characters from the movie or...? Well, I think that many of them would eat it. Okay, that's a pretty low bar to clear. You could say that about any movie ever. Except maybe Super Size Me, I guess. There's some red on the bun, which does make me think of, I guess, fire or blood. Is there a lot of blood in the franchise? Well, there are Vikings and stuff. I think it or blood. Is there a lot of blood in the franchise or?

Well, there are Vikings and stuff. I think it's implied. Ah, crap, you didn't tell me there's Vikings in it. Yeah. Now I'm getting arrested. I assume when they say dragon flame grill burger that they use dragon flame authentic to make it. I would assume so.

Yeah. There's also fiery dragon mozzarella fries. Oh, that's a big part of the movie. Mozzarella fries come up a lot in the movie. Every other minute when they get an injury, like I mentioned, they will often use mozzarella fries as like tourniquets or to plug up a wound. They're mushy, the dragon doesn't have teeth,

he needs mushy food. It's like a whole thing in the movie. In addition to bringing the flame, BK is bringing the heat with fiery dragon mozzarella fries featuring melty mozzarella cheese, peppers, and fiery Calabrian chili pepper breading for the perfect fiery snack, served in a one of a kind, toothless inspired carton.

It's nice. That's actually what they do with the mozzarella fries too, they stick them inside the dragon's head for storage because dragons are very porous, which is a big plot point in the movie. So when they need to store their dragon fries, they put them in the dragon's head for later. Now Travis, if you can see on there,

the special toothless inspired carton, you can see there and there's wings on it. And I guess what my question is, does that make you feel something? Do you like that box looks like the dragon? Here's what I'll say. It makes me feel something, but mostly that I'm looking at a knockoff picture of Toothless

that I might see on like a boardwalk T-shirt and not like spray paint. It doesn't look- Your real son. It doesn't look like Toothless. He looks like he's saying, if you try to eat these fries, I will bite your hand. Is that maybe what live action Toothless looks like? I don't believe so.

I don't know. But I haven't seen the movie. He's less rectangular than that in the movie. And he's not as box shaped. Yeah, he is not shaped like a carton of mozzarella fries. Next up we got Soaring Strawberry Lemonade. And hey, huge promotion to the person that had to try to sell this one.

Yeah. Soar to new heights and quench your thirst for adventure with the all new Soaring Strawberry Lemonade. Yeah, no, that's actually straight, that's canon, because when they're flying on the dragon's backs, there's a couple points where they go through pink clouds and then they come out and they're like, I'm soaked in strawberry lemonade.

Why are there strawberry lemonade clouds up here? So that's a direct reference. And Justin, I would love for you to have to come up with how to trade your dragon theme tie in for this pink. It had to be pink lemonade. Dragon fruit. It's pink lemonade. Yeah.

Dragon fruit would have been better. But dragon fruit maybe doesn't taste so good in lemonade. Oh, like they needed to, yeah, they don't. You think originally it was regular lemonade and they're like, this is dragon's piss. Yeah, man. Can I tell you, if you have a kid of a certain age and you say you want a big cup of dragon piss,

they would love it. Probably, yeah. Lastly, there's a Viking's Chocolate Sunday. Finish the adventure with Viking's Chocolate Sunday. Now, I take huge issue with this. Okay. Cause canonically- Can I tell you what it is first?

Well, all of the Vikings are lactose intolerant. Okay, well that's good to know. Also, the spicy mozzarella fries Okay. Cause can I tell you what it is first? Well, all of the Vikings are lactose intolerant. Okay, well that's good to know. The spicy mozzarella fries put these guys on the toilet for hours. Hours. Well, that's why it balances out cause the spice they're like, it's worth it.

A lot of the movie is real time shitting after they eat the mozzarella, they don't cut away, you hear them. The dragons mostly train themselves while you're stuck on the John because of the Burger King combo. They eat the mozzarella, they don't cut away, you hear them. The dragons mostly train themselves while you're stuck on the John because of the Burger King combo. But unless you're about to tell me about a spicy sundae,

Justin, I can't imagine they're putting them through what would be hours of bathroom experience. Finish the adventure with Vikings chocolate sundae. I don't think I've ever heard that, finish the adventure. Yeah. A delicious sweet treat. I've heard it when a adventure. Yeah. Yeah. A delicious sweet treat. I've heard it when a pirate climaxes, but yeah.

It features vanilla soft serve with Hershey's chocolate syrup and black and green cookie crumbles. Quote, at BK, we love to bring partnerships to life that create an awesome experience for families. And money. Our new collaboration with How to Train Your Dragon is gonna be fun

For both kids and kids at heart Says somebody for what about grown-ups at heart? Nope. Our team has created. I'm a mature Responsible adult married father of two I'm an adult at heart and I have to get me some of these spicy cheese fries and this art burger Our team has created a delicious menu. Have the Dragon Ball Burger I'm sold at heart and I have to get me some of these spicy cheese fries and this burger. Our team has created a delicious menu. Have the Dragon Ball Burger. Inspired by the beloved characters and themes

of this exciting new movie that brings the experience to Burger King restaurants. What themes would you say are best captured by fiery dragon mozzarella? I guess the theme of heat. There's a lot of heat in the fire, the theme of fire, I guess. Well, they use the Mozzarella sticks.

It's a metaphor for love and connection because like two of the sticks are out of the Mozzarella stick and it stretches out between him and Hiccup. And there's a 45 minute long monologue about how the string of mozzarella stick connecting them is like the love that connects them. And then they kiss. So that might be the theme.

And they kiss. This movie's eight hours long, by the way. Yeah. So there's the How to Train Your Dragon scoop, Trav. You can start getting that May 27th. Enjoy. I don't know if I can wait that long. I might try to make some of this at home.

Ah, it seems too dangerous. I'm just going to wait. Does it come with a special crown? You didn't even mention the special crown. You know, the special crown is in the press release, so I didn't know how to cover it in our audio podcast, but yes, there is a very good looking crown that has horns on it. So that's very exciting.

Travis, does that make you feel something? It makes me feel confused because it says How to Train Your Dragon Only in theaters. And I know that they're talking about the live action one, but How to Train Your Dragon is also a movie that's available pretty much everywhere else. You're right, it's not only in theaters, is it? Moreover, I don't want a crown that says How to Train Your Dragon Only in, DreamWorks How to Train Your Dragon Only in theaters, is it? Moreover, I don't want a crown that says

how to train your dragon only in, DreamWorks, how to train your dragon only in theaters on it. I'm the immersion, I get what you guys are going for here with this incredibly immersive inspired combo meal, but I don't want to wear a crown that says how to train your dragon only in theaters on it because that's not what the real dragon king would wear. Yeah.

Do you not what I mean? Like, have the courage of your convictions to know this is a how to train your dragon officially licensed Burger King crown. You don't need to fucking put it on there. Let me live my fantasy, please. They should include a book of matches instead of a crown. I think that would fit the theme more.

Yeah, fire. It's like, pretend like you're a dragon at home and set fire to things. And I think that would be feel really on brands. Yeah, that's true. I don't want any of this. I celebrate them for not pitching it as a meal though. Thank you.

Thank you guys. That's true. It's an adventure. That's why they use it to their adventure. It's not a meal, it's an adventure. You can't refer. It's not a meal, it's a way. It's a strawberry lemonade and an ice cream sundae

and mozzarella fries and a perfectly round dragon burger and a crown. It's not a meal, it's an adventure. You gotta have the burger orb, the spicy cheese fries, the giant sundae and the huge pink lemonade and the adventure. And then you'll unlock the crown on your third playthrough.

The real Isle of Berk. The bathroom. Hey folks, thank you so much for enjoying this podcast, assuming that you did enjoy it. And you're welcome for us making it. Yeah, or sorry if you didn't, just I don't know why we're covering our bases like this. Yeah, you usually don't hedge that much

on the entertainment value of our products, apologies. I don't know what got into me. Hey, we're gonna be, are we this week now? As they're listening to this, right? We're gonna be doing some shows this week in Michigan and Minnesota. So if you can get tickets to those still, bit.ly forward slash McElroy Tours

is where you can get those. If you are coming to those and you got a question you want answered or a fear that you'd like read aloud, email that to mbmbamatmaximumfund.org and put your city in the subject line. And we've got a bunch of other tour dates coming up, including California, Texas, Georgia, Utah,

and a bunch of other ones. If you go to bit.ly slash McElroy Tours, you'll find all the info and ticket links and stuff there. All the Taz shows are gonna be Taz versus, except for Anaheim. That Taz show is going to be Dadlands with game mom Brennan Lee Mulligan. Check those out, bit.ly slash McElroy Tours.

We got some new merch, including flaming not poisoning raging tea of doom, a spicy caffeine free tea that we made in collaboration with Good Store Tea. I love it. I've gone through our stash entirely already and we'll need to procure more of this delicious, delicious tea. I love it. I've gone through our stash entirely already and will need to procure more of this delicious, delicious tea. There's also a Plato's Rave 1000 piece puzzle designed by Danielle Maijo Birch and 10% of all merch proceeds this month will be donated to the

Center for Reproductive Rights. All of that is over at MacRoyMerch.com. And hey, thanks to Montane for these for our theme song, My Life is Better with You. Check out some of the new tunes that Montane's been putting out, teasing on Soshi. You're gonna groove, you're grooving. I also wanna say thank you, we're recording this before Champions Grove,

but thank you to everybody who came out to Champions Grove. I assume a great time, and I assume it will be great. So thank you to everybody who came out to Champions Grove. We had, I assume, a great time, and I assume it will be great. So thank you all for that. Also, I wanna say I haven't mentioned it in a while, but I stream on Twitch fairly regularly. If you go to twitch.tv slash the Travis McRoy, you can find it there.

We also haven't mentioned, hey, come watch McRoy family clubhouse. It's every Tuesday. Oh, let's take it clean. No, you don't say cum house. Did I say, I don't think it came out as Cumhouse. Wait, let's just take it clean for me. All right, let me try again.

Hey, and we haven't mentioned this in a while. Come on down Tuesdays to the McElroy family Cumhouse. And that's a new one Tuesdays on our YouTube channel, which is the McElroy family. Nailed it. Yeah. God, everyone. One of us was right, one of us was wrong,

and history will decide which is which. Do we have a fear or whatever? Yeah, we do. Griffin, why don't you read it? This year, I'd like to be faster than my fear that I am aging to a point where I'm finally going to be able to relate to the grown-ups film franchise. My name's Justin McElroy.

I'm Travis McElroy. I'm Griffin McElroy. This has been My Brother, My Brother, Me. Kiss your dads. Square on the lips. My name's Justin McElroy. I'm Travis McElroy. I'm Griffin McElroy. This has been My Brother, My Brother Made. Kiss your dads. Square on the lips. My life, ah, it's better, it's better with you. This is true, ah, it's better, it's better with two. My life, ah, it's better with you.