My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 779: Bugbag Mode

Episode Date: September 8, 2025

It may be early September, but we haven’t forgotten what this autumnal season is all about. That’s right, Harvest Christ. He’s here to teach us about everything but air, blinking, and sin! This includes deep John Cena lore, how to hide in public, and putting up your own personal anti-bus stop.Suggested talking points: Love Affair with the Spot on the Floor, Written But Real, Zero Goose Guarantee, Gourd SlurryEquality Florida: https://www.eqfl.org/

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool, baby? It's the start of something beautiful. A small acquaintance has blossomed, it's rapping, and two. A precious friendship I could have never seen

What was coming for me Hangs at the skate park Hangs by the beach My life It feels live Life It's better It's better with you

My life Ah It's better With you This is true It's better. It's better with two. My way.

Ah, it's better with you. Hello, everybody, and welcome to my brother, my brother, me, an advice show for the modern era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. What's up, Trav Nation? It's me, your middleist brother, Travis, Vroom, Vroom, Big Dog, Wolf, Mackerooy. And I'm Bugbag. What?

I'm Bugbag. This is a new character because I'm sick and my voice sounds like this. I thought it would be a good time to try out my new character, Bugbag. Okay, what's his deal? He's like a bag of bugs that a wizard brought to life as a curse. Tell a old show. Wait, sorry, show don't tell. Well, I can't, it's not a, it's an audio, as you so frequently remind me, Justin, it is an audio product we're making.

I can't show you bug bag, I don't have a bag. You could do like a monologue against you. Like you inhabit him. Yeah, like, do a monologue. Like, to do his I want song. Where you're fighting with your enemy, John Bonington. Yeah. Well, no, this is, and I'm so glad you said that, Travis,

because obviously it came to my mind that people might think of oogie-buggy, and it's not, it's super-duper not that. It's not about, he's buggy-buggy, I'm not an oogie-bug-y thing. Yeah, no, no, no, it's in, he's different. I'm my own guy, I'm over it. He's not guy-shaped. It's important you guys understand about Bugbag that he's not shaped like a guy. Like a big old bag

Not a man Is it like a Ziplog bag? Can you see through it? All I want some definition In my bag Sench me up Corset style Give me a humanoid form

That I can get on tender And meet us Somebody special Xo-Skeleton limbs Would be so cool But the text's not there Yeah, yeah, squish me out some arms so I can hug my kids. He's got kids?

Yeah, he does. Justin, did you just bust your lip on the microphone, pal? Earlier. I love that. That's like sacrifice for your art and it's powerful. That's like when a pro wrestler really bleeds on the stairs and stuff. Yeah, Bugback loves on this t-shirt. I have to tell a remaining, I have to tell remaining Dragon Con story because I didn't want to deploy it while we were still at the venue for pretty obvious reasons.

uh we were in the elevator uh and the backstage elevators at conventions are wild because they're these big freight guys and you're usually being ferried between like a green room and some signing place you end up in the elevators of people you have no business in elevators with if you're us and uh we ended up in an elevator with uh us and our dad and amanda and simon peg and simon pegs three people that keep people from talking to simon peck do you guys when you have the moment where you realize it's Simon Pegg or a person who's too famous that you shouldn't be allowed to be around them. It's like a scary feeling, like a big scary feeling that makes time kind of stop and slow down a little bit. I do an unconscious head nod as if you're like, yep, this is the

situation I'm in now. Travis, I see him steal himself. Travis always does that nod. And it's like, that is actually, to me, kind of reaffirming. Yeah. Because what you say is like, we're all seeing it, we're all on the same page. And we look to you, Travis, for that nod to know that you've got it fucking cocked and loaded and that you're going to step in here. But then right before you could draw and shoot from the hip, or not draw. Or not draw. And you got to watch Travis. Can you see the body language? Travis is giving a full hangback. Yeah. Because he knew we had a fleeting, an elevator is so rough. Yeah. Because what if they need to split

immediately from you at any moment? And it's, that's uncomfortable. You can't have owned spaced on DVD and then say something in that moment. You're unqualified. There is also a FAMO body language code that I found when you're in a freight elevator is the least interesting elevator in the world and it's full of people and they have picked a spot on the floor that they're just like, I love this spot. I can't stop looking at this spot. I'm fascinated by this spot.

Have you guys ever seen on a freight elevator floor like this before that they're like, oh no, they've disassociated. They don't want to be in this elevator with me. That's no judgment on Mr. Pegg. We all disagree. Fine, dude. Yeah, absolutely. It's fine. It's just that moment.

I deal with my kids constantly. Yeah, everybody does it. This look of just like, I'm trying to just be inside my head right now and not out here with people. And I saw him doing that and I was like, this isn't the time. So I briefly mentioned that dad was in the elevator too. So later when I revealed the killer, it would be more surprising. Like, I had hoped you'd forget he'd be in the elevator. So now when I'm like, but.

But then dad, dad, dad is shameless, he doesn't care. No, correct. He just wants to get a story out of these people. He's 70 years old. Doesn't give a shit. He wants to talk to Christopher Lloyd about broccoli. It's a thing. And it's becoming a walking anecdote.

And you know what? I celebrate it because it's pretty funny to me personally, usually. Yes. As long as we're not stuck in a moving box. Yeah. Yeah, Trav. As long as Tom Cruise's friend is stuck in a box with us, Dad clocks it and I see the gears turning

and my dad is going for something some sort of thing he can say to Simon Pegg and in my head time slows down and I think of all the different options and then dad says that's a great shirt now Simon Pegg is wearing an Echo in the Bunnyman t-shirt

yes our dad no concept no content would not know an Echo in the Bunny Man if one was riding on his shoulder Yeah. Would it know echo from the bunny men? Yes. There's like three people in the elevator who are privy to this Venn diagram of information, and it's us.

Yes. And I, I can't speak for you guys. I'm chilled to the boat. Oh, dude. And dad did it with like kind of a whole great, like, I know. And all I could think is this gambit has such a short shelf life if Simon Pegg pursues it one inch forward. Oh, thank you. your fan, it's all falling apart.

If you think I won't leave you hanging, I will pick up a chef's hat and be like, bonsoir, I'm a cheque en la patacillie, and then go a different way. I ran through in my head the life of our father to try and figure out when he would have dipped his snoot into like early 80s post-punk British rock. Just trying to think, like maybe he, I don't know,

spent some time in the aisles. Did they open for the Doobie Brothers at any point? Yeah, maybe the Echo and the Buddyman open for Michael McDonald. No, okay, here's the thing, though. If I had been a little bit quicker thinking and if I had been a little bit more merciless, I could have laid down a dad out flat in a way that probably would have impressed Simon Peck.

If you turned to her own dad and said, name three Echo in the Bunnyman songs, not counting the killing moon go. Like, you may say, if you mentioned Justin Mcorraine around Simon Pegg in a week or two, he would be like, the podcast guy he's ice cold

I went to saw him kill his dad right in front of me with words he laid him out with words it was he left he just laid down on the ground I've never seen anything like it

I should also say just to complete the thing Simon Pegg then graciously did a oh yeah thanks and he said no Travis dad was very explicit about this he said

oh thanks man gave him one of us thanks man and then he went back to his love affair with the spot on the floor yeah yeah

there's a little bug down there A chilling moment Absolutely a chilling A chilling moment Not like the rest of this show though This is an advice show This is a warming environment This is a warming energy that we have here

Autumn is settling in Oh thank you It's fall y'all Spooky season Next weekend I'm taking my nephew to his first Rassling show He's nine

And I'm not sure he's even aware The concept of pro wrestling How should I explain it to him? I mean I would say you'd probably We probably should have started teaching him moves long ago. He's going to get his ass-jit. Are you kidding me? Nine?

Yeah, no. He says, to what extent should I let him in on the CAFabe? And that's from Rowdy Uncle. Huh. I think that this is, you've got very zoomed-in view here. Your nine-year-old nephew already has a huge concept of K-Fabe and pro wrestling through things like Pokemon. through, like, what is Pokemon except Animal Pro Wrestling and K-Fave?

Yeah, I mean, that's one of the wrongers things you said. What are you talking about? You pin them against each other. They have signature moves. You get like this type, doesn't like that type. Think about the TV show where you get to, like, you included this question just so you could deliver your thesis statement on how wrestling is Pokemon,

and I want to tell you that's wrong-headed. No, no, no, no, Griffith, Griffin, Griffin. Pokemon is wrestling. Pokemon is wrestling. Okay. That is cool. I mean, there are Pokemon who are sort of like wrestlers, right? Like Howlucha.

One of my personal favorites, fighting flying type, and he's got like the luchador mask and everything. So like, I don't understand how that could co-existence. Justin, can I talk to you over here for a second? No. You introduced Pokemon into the show and we've talked about this. I thought I put it in and we could have a conversation with it. I'm not going to talk about Pokemon with anybody.

Certainly not you, not you. I'm not even that deep. Travis, I'm not even that deep in the scene anymore, man. This is basic common knowledge. I'm surprised at you. If it's outside to 151, Griffin, I... Oh, he's turned his back on us. Yeah, I did.

I've never seen him do this. Well, I've never had to fucking do it before, Justin. This has never been an option. I was aware of if we could do this. Can I say Griffin's back? Looks like he's weakened at Bernie's dead. Why does it look like he's posed in the chair? Yeah, man.

I'm the bug bag. Oh, I forgot. Yeah, I forgot. Did you forget? he's the bug bag? I did for just a second. The bug bag turns his back on you is a powerful move.

I think... It's tough. One of the tough things about raising kids is you got to teach them everything. They don't know anything when they come out.

You got to teach them everything. Not air and blinking, but other than that. Sin. Sin, air blinking. Well, no, they know about air and blinking. But, like, you have to teach them about the sin and they did.

You have to teach kids about seeing through bullshit but really the most effective way of doing that is to lay out some bullshit and hope that they start asking the right questions because you can't just lay it all out for them because they won't buy it. They got to be able to work through it on their own

but you do hope that they'll pick up on the clues. You know what I mean? And start starting to have their own suspicions. I will say this, man. I wish more things had K-Fabe because BB's one of those that's like, yeah, but why is that? Right?

So like when we're watching a movie and it's like that person just did something mean to that person, why did they do that? And the only answer that it really boils down to is, well, the writers wrote it that way. But if I could say because three years ago, that person, like, betrayed them during a tag team match because they, like, flirted with their girlfriend and then had a fight backstage and stole the hearse that they, like, if I could do that and she, like, makes complete sense. show me a pile driver now it's really interesting point Travis I feel like John Cena's been getting off a little too easy in Hollywood like I want to see him out of press junket for peacemaker and they'd be like I'm so excited to talk about the show you almost killed Cody Rhodes last week because the rock put a spell on you the rock excuse me I'd love to talk about your work some of your philanthropic business

Mr. Sina but last week I watched you beat the ever loving bloody shit out of Cody Rhodes because of the spell the rock put on you. And maybe you could answer some questions about that. First, please. Do you think that you could... Do you think you could still break up John Siena with a... How well deployed would your I Can't See You joke need to be to break up John Sina with an I Can't See You gag?

Like how long, how protracted would you need to keep that bit going? Or do you think he has heard at this point, like literally every permutation? I think just if you're doing... I'm doing an interview with him, just insist that they keep setting up more and more cameras. No, see, I feel like he would, he would immediately, like, he would definitely, he'd be like, uh-uh, no, I'm on to you. Like, he would definitely see through that. Okay, film a whole, like, $60 million budget movie. But every scene that he's in, you have digitally edited him out of.

And you get to the premiere. Oh, that's cool. And you show it. And it's like, fuck, he didn't show him. Travis is right. There is still definitely stuff we could do to fuck with this guy. That would be good if he showed up, like, season two, and James Gunn is there. And you know he's got the budget now.

Yeah. He's got the juice to put out a premiere where, like, you can't see him. And, like, what would be good is if James Good, the whole time was, like, as the premiere was airing, like, in the theater, he just kept standing up like, fuck. Oh, damn it! That's awesome. That's awesome. You ruined it. He doesn't understand.

You ruined it. Do you think if you threw a marble at John Cena and it didn't pass clean through him? well you can feel him yeah that would be cool if that was his the other four sentences still work it'd be cool if you hear him feel him taste him touch him why a marble is that referencing some sort of deep john sita lore yeah he's yeah he lost a shooter from way back grvin don't lie to me i will believe anything you tell me there was a brief flat line where john sina was in neverland and he was one of the lost boys and he was having fun out there and he lost his dang marbles there and um i don't know is that real no that's not real

but okay see i do apologize all the things i said the rock it's important you guys know that the rock put a spell a curse on john cina to make him beat the shit out of cody roads and now but now he's cool again now they're cool again they squash that beef really fast i just i thought you would like this sort of magical realism that they're bringing don't say fucking don't say anything to this year old. Let them go and then ask them what they thought afterwards and then go from there. Because if they think it's magic and cool and real, that's awesome. Because one day they'll learn that it's not and they're going to go through a long weird period until they start to respect the craft again. And they realize even though it's written. And the athleticism,

they realize even though it's written, it's still real. To me, damn it. Written but real. Written but real. These are the new taglines for wrestling. Is that a wrestling? And I don't think WWE's going to pick but maybe AEW or some other league written but real you can feel me mm scit what scripted but

you know what I mean like scripted but scurrilous like what's a scripted but didn't think we got it with written but real written but real is good but like script scripted but you killed the vibe man

I know. Dude, the vibe's in the fucking toilet, dude. Perfect. It would be a good. I never get to be the one who sits silently while someone says dumb shit. I was so happy during that moment. It's no good. I get why you guys do it to me.

It's a nice break. It's a nice break for sure. It's a good. It's a good relaxer. Thank you, Justin. That was a gift. That was a good joke. That was a good joke.

Do a different better one. Different better one. Write this moment, please. Don't tell anything to this nine-year-old. Except you love him. Tell him you love him, I guess. Oh, and ask if they need, like, a drink. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Use the bathroom or something. Like, you should, you know, normal stuff. You know? Yeah. Because if he gets separated. He's nine, he doesn't have a GPS. Tell him if another kid is looking at him weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, tell him important stuff. How about another question, please. Yes. I'd love to help you guys out with that. I work in a fairly industrial part of my city, and there aren't really any places to sit outside. nearby. I often like to enjoy my lunch outside as opposed

to the oppressive clinical break room at the corporate retail store I work at. It's small and gray and covered in corporate images of real people acting like they enjoy working here. Anyway, I want to spend my lunch outside. However, the only place to sit and enjoy my meal is a comfortable looking bus bench a few hundred feet

from my work. I see the bus come by and stop often, but it only stops if there's a potential patron waiting on the bench. I do not want to stop the bus for me when I'm just enjoying my break brothers how can I sit on this comfortable bus bench and enjoy my lunch without the bus thinking I need a ride and stopping for me oh man that's from barely comfortable in British Columbia yeah I mean say for the record like you can just say next time you want to get outside like you do not need to justify to us we just do the podcast

like you can eat wherever you do not judge the reasons why you might want to eat outside is it my favorite side to eat in no but that doesn't mean inside If anything, we've learned, that's where geese are. Geese is, I have a zero goose guarantee in this house. I can tell you that. Bus bench. There's a few chairs out there that when you're sitting on them, you're making a statement. That's true.

Toilet. Throne. Stool in the corner. Like, electric chair. Electric chair, for sure, juice. Modling, but, but yeah. Modlin, but accurate. Bus bench.

Bus bench. Cuck chair? Cuck chair. The bus bench is the cuck chair of the sidewalk. Yeah. I don't think that's actually true. You're not a cuck if you take the bus. I'm sorry I said that you're a cuck if you take the bus.

I love the bus. I love the bus. No, I just think the sidewalk is the... Hold on. Okay. I think we haven't brought up in a while, but I think a sign would help. Yeah.

I mean, but there's lots of signs on the bus. There's lots of signs on the road that I do want the bus driver to be paying attention to. I'm not sure I want to throw bonus signs in there. all willy-knowing. Yeah. And there's probably all right. And one sign that I would say should be helping right now is

bus, like the sign that says bus stop, you know? Yeah. That should tell you that you shouldn't eat there. Like, there's already a sign doing a job. You know what I mean? Like, you can't put up your own sign that's like, but not me. Because there's a sign that says bus stop. There's already a sign there. There should be an exclamation

point after bus and then a period after stop. And now that signs for you saying bus, Stop. Here's what you do. Eating here. When the bus stops and opens their doors to let you on,

you poke your head inside and look around and then say, I'll catch the next one and sit back down and keep you. So weird. Wasting so much. Do you realize

if you make a bus stop for you and there's 30 people on it and that stop takes 45 seconds, all of a sudden you're talking about two minutes and 15 seconds. Two minutes and 15 seconds. No, I think it's more than,

it's like 20 minutes or something like that of people time you've wasted gasoline a good way to gain some feeling of control though over the universe and everything to inflict that kind of punishment on other people you know what i mean on public transit and public transit users you're slowing the system down you're making it less efficient when you see the bus coming hop up and hide behind the bench no no i mean yeah that'll work but don't But don't, man I saw somebody yesterday I was on Route 60 and it wasn't Route 60 Walker It was a different guy He was like in a parking lot And he was wearing

White linen pants No shirt, no shoes Fuck yeah Hooka necklace Striding through the parking lot Outside the The fuel And the

Evaroni's there Just like striding Just striding through the parking lot No shoes, no shirt, white linen pants. It was amazing. I want to stop it asking, like, how's it going? It's like, what's so chill today? You know what I mean?

Like, I don't know. I even know what to say to him. It's awesome, though. So you're saying just walk more? Walkmore and how this is active, helpful. Well, it's like people, people. I love you. I saw a cool guy juice.

Like, I'm fucking stoked. No, I'm just saying I love people out in the environment, just kind of make it at their own. You know what I mean? Like, absolutely. If you brought a folding chair from home, how far away from the bus stop would you have to place it? Yeah. But for A, you're outside of the bus stopping zone, and B, it's not weird.

If you got a folding chair, the bus stop is no longer in the equation. Suddenly, you're king of all outdoors. You know what I mean? Like, who cares about the bus stop anymore? But the answer is 15 feet is the answer 15 feet. And if the bus stops, you can be like, what the fuck are you doing, man? clearly this is not this has nothing to do with the bus stop clearly i'm on my own thing over here i like the hiding idea i did want to say that hiding in public is tough as a dad i do a lot of

hide and seek with my kids sometimes at like a playground or at um the backyard or front yard of my house and you can't see a middle-aged man in his own bushes fucking it's Goblin mode, fucking bug bag mode. And I know that if people see me from the street, they're going to be like, um, cops, and I don't, I, you just can't, you just can't, doing it at a playground being fucking, some other kid runs up and finds you inside of like a little metal tunnel, like, he, he, I'm going to, I'm going to hide so good, and I'm going to win the game with my son. There's no fucking way, man.

There's no solution for it. Do you think a good life, if you're breaking into someone's house and they call the cops, And you tell the cops, like, I'm playing a really competitive game of hide-and-seek with my kids? Yeah. Do you think that that would at least buy you enough time to get away? I don't know, Chad, but it's questions like that that may get hard for me to enjoy my leisure time with my children. That's fair. Rather than hide at the bus stop when the bus shows up, what if you hid at work?

You know, if you think about the entrance to the building, that's one side of it. All right? There's going to be three other sides to that building that people are not going in and out of. So I would encourage you to take a step off that beam path, take that road less travel, walk around to the side of the building, and maybe there's a little spot that you can start to reclaim, you know, to take on as your own. No one's going to go over there, just like a little, like leave the chair, you know what I mean? Unless. Unless. Unless.

Unless. Get on the bus. Get on the bus. And then get off of the next stop, walk back. You got your lunch. You got a little exercise. eyes? You saw the world? Opened your eyes a little bit. Maybe broadened your horizons. Since their time with the bus driver, get to know them. Write it every time. And then say,

hey, just for future reverence, I eat my lunch there. You don't have to stop and pick me up. I like both your guys' plans. Don't make me choose. Don't make me choose. I don't make me choose. I like both of the plans. Please don't make me choose. Ask the driver to just drive around the block a couple times driver driver sorry pick get on the bus you think that we're so we're just looking for more inefficiency like where can you make this great system less than plan Travis was to find a little secret garden your plan was to waste people's time we didn't even talk about my plan by the way you charged right past my plan to do your plan classic can you build a secret garden on the bus do you know just not what is that

I'm trying to find a middle ground. You heard it, right? You heard it. But I'm trying to find a middle ground. There's no middle ground between right and wrong. Could you ride the bus inside your own secret garden? Maybe a tiny bus. You're so attached to this fucking bus.

And you're not even here in the other stuff. You're not. Everything you've suggested has been so bus space. Maybe start your own bus line to compete. Maybe you get a job at the bus company. That's a great idea. The bus is the enemy in this situation. The bus is our opponent.

And we're like trying to figure out like, here's a person. practical thing you can do, find your own little secret garden, go hang out with the Smoky Joes, buy the loading dock and snarf your lunch. And you're over here like, do you think two buses could get married? Wait, hold on, I didn't even think about this. What if a bus could become a person, like a transformer?

And then you could marry that. Could a Metro bus marry a VW bus in this scenario, Griffin, or do you have balls against it? What's how you're fucking me, man? I'm trying to help this person get fed in the middle of the day. And you're over here talking about how much you want buses kissing. Griffin and I are trying to be a giving tree for this

person and you're like, get on the bus and then hump the bus. It doesn't make any sense, too. Go get on the bus, ask for consent and then hump the bus. Don't hump the bus. Well, maybe it's... Don't say unless either, Travis, what if it's a hump bus? Unless earlier. What if it's a hump bus, Travis?

It's Griffin, if you're afraid, if you can't just say shit, what's a hump bus? The underpinnings of the whole franchise. It's a bus driven by a camel. Travis just own it, man. It's just disengaged. You got high off of when I bombed earlier and you're still buzzing. Fuck, okay, you're right.

I thought I could do anything. You got to calm down there. You're spinning out. It's all falling apart. I'm so tired. The thing is, we just did four days of jokes. The fighting makes me so tired. Oh, man.

Makes me strong. It makes me strong. Um, should we go to the money zone? Take me there. Take me there, daddy. Uh-huh. It's better. It's better with you.

I wanted to apologize to you guys real quick, because I haven't sent you birthday cards in several years. It's just that the getting stamps and everything, I don't know how to do it. And so I just, I know it's been like 12 years since I sent you a birthday. card or a Christmas card or like good luck on you know your endoscopy card all that stuff it's weird about that it's Travis we have for many many years been telling our listeners about stamps.com which is a website where you can go that's real that's weird I thought that was

a lot you thought it was like a joke like we were pranking the listeners we've run into this a few times and so sometimes Travis thinks the ads are still part of the show I thought it was so you thought that it was just too it sounded too great to yeah Yeah, there's no way. Which part? We tell jokes during the ads sometimes, Jews. Which part of the Stamps.com proposition seemed the most unrealist thing. Frankly, the fact that I could do it all at home, right from my computer phone or other smart device.

Yeah. I know. I know. It seems unreal, but it's true. And it sounds, it like busts. I fucking get it because it busts me up when I hear stuff like Stamps.com gets you incredible rates like up to 89% off USBs and UPS.S. Yeah. Like, it's a funny number.

That's funny. Yeah, yeah. It's all, yeah, it's close. And they offer 24-7 support. That doesn't seem real, but it's true. No, there's only six days in a week. So like this next part, Trav and our listeners, are totally real. Spend less time on busy work and more time on your business with Stamps.com.

Code to Stamps.com and use code my brother for a one-month free trial plus $5 in postage and a digital scale. That's Stamps.com code my brother. I know I stumbled on the word digital. That was not a joke. That was an accident done during a very real. and authentic hashtag not jk hashtag not jk hashtag real life

hashtag real life so where can we look forward to some more greetings from you trap is that yeah man I've got a backlog to send yeah fucking right what's my address number one dump street fuck man you got my ass I was trying to get your ass and you fucking turned it on me

yeah that's that that was is that not it is that not your address Have you been sending letters to number one dump street? Yeah. We got to stop saying addresses. It's like 6969 Cool Street all over again. Someone lives on one dump street. Now they're going to get fucking craft macaroni and cheese mailed to their house or some shit.

Don't do that shit, people. In Bootyville, USA? Travis, God damn it. Yeah, because the world's so big that does exist, I bet. Probably Wisconsin, I bet. I want a munch squad Oh, bugbag, go I want to munch

Squared Bap, bav, bbba, bha, bha, bha, bha, bha, bha, bha, bha, bha, bha. You almost kill Bugbaggat. Shut up. Just be caught. Shut up. Stop talking. Try to do one bit.

This is a podcast of the podcast from Fun. The Lace and Grace and Brady. I'm going to have to apologize. Dad's going to be mad at me now that I said, shut up. I'm going to get trouble. You know we don't say that to each other. Sorry.

But Travis called me stupid earlier, so I think we're probably even. Yeah, listen. It all balances out. That's what I tell my kids. It all balances out. Did you hear when he said I live at Dump Street? Travis is off the fucking change this episode.

We got to go on tour again next week. I know. I don't know how we messed up so bad. No, those shows are going to be great. They're going to be amazing. We're going to be broken by them. They make close. claim our lives.

So it's my favorite time of the year. That is pumpkin spice season. And for me, pumpkin spice season means something a little different because I don't really get pumpkin spice lattes. For me, this season is really about watching how other chains

justify including pumpkin on their menu. Because I don't know why, but everybody is still out here trying to explain it away. So let's check in with voodoo donuts to start off with. voodoo donuts announces pumpkin spice latte donut and a pumpkin buttermilk bar get ready for this voodoo donut the iconic creator of handcrafted innovative donuts is excited to announce two new seasonal creations the pumpkin spice latte donut and the pumpkin spice latte bar you know there's a pumpkin spice latte donut is a it's filled with delectable pumpkin spice fluff and dipped in bold magic roast espresso frosting it's a pumpkin spice latte donut there is a when you live long enough as We have children.

You see edgy, cool, like, companies and places, independent things become what they once hated. Whoa. This booms me. I hate trav? Yeah. A hundred percent. Here's the quote from the CEO of Voodoo Donuts, Chris Schultz. We wanted to create a little pumpkin for everyone this fall.

From the latte lovers to the pumpkin purists, these limited time donuts are made to bring a little season. joy to every guest who walks through our doors. Chris, I once bought a bucket of old donuts from a voodoo donuts for $10. Yeah, like a five-gallon plastic bucket. Yeah.

You guys used to fuck. What happened? A pumpkin spice latte donut? You're washed Corpo pig. If I washed You're washed Corpo pig. I'm iconic creator of handcrafted innovative donuts and then you have the gall to announce a pumpkin

Spice Latte donut? Chris! Also, if I met someone and they told me they were a pumpkin purist, I don't know why, but I would assume, like, you've got a lot more stuff going on.

Baskin Robb... Sorry, Griff, go ahead. You want to weigh in on how cool Voodoo Dutodes used to be? Yeah. No, I mean, they've got to make a living. It's tough out there. You know, I get it.

Baskin Robbins brings about pumpkin cheese cake ice cream and debuts new pumpkin spice how should you say that debuse no that sounds bad i don't know i like that it sounds though debuts dubus debuts new pumpkin spice frozen beverage fall is in the air and in your cup basket robins is welcome one more time falls in the air and in your cup cool i would assume that some of the air got in my cup then yeah i got a new pumpkin spice cap so you gotta wash your cups man it's a frozen coffee beverage that delivers cozy vibes with every sip.

Hey, um, hey guys. Yeah. You can't have a, man. Available nationwide beginning September 1st, these limited time seasonal offerings are the ultimate way to embrace sweater weather, no matter what the thermometer says. There's like eight fall, like buzzwords that have just become like, just, I don't know, throw these in a blender, chop them up and sad libs it out.

season is just a flavor now like the entirety of the season has been subsumed yeah we need to you're not in the pumpkin mood well the capy lineup features a variety of bold creamy flavors that hit the spot every time choose from fan favorites like classic caramel prowling chocolate fudge and Oreo but wait i hear you saying duncan how can you justify having pumpkin on your menu on Nicole aboutwell the vice president of brand marketing has this to say pumpkin is more more than just a flavor. It's a seasonal must-have. With pumpkin cheesecake and the new pumpkin spice cappy,

guests can enjoy cozy fall flavors with their refreshing twists. That lets them celebrate the season in the most delicious way. All I'm saying is that fall used to be about one thing, autumnal Jesus. And now, thank you, Travis. We have black corporations get in. Harvest Christ, thank you. Yes.

Yes. And now we've gone in. and we've taken away the meaning of what harvest Christ Atominal Jesus once brought to us And forgotten, forgotten About this. We've forgotten all the other

Atomal friends, like green, like, Where's my green beams? Where's my green beams? Sorry, say again? Where's my green beams? Smoothie. Where's my eggplant? Where's my smoothie?

It makes me shoot green beams. I want my green beams smoothie And I want eggplant fries And I want A potty. With rooms full of laughter 10,000 tons of ice cream Hey, nectar juice bar

Is unveiling a reimagined Better for you pumpkin lineup Thank God Now this is really This is unhinged Pumpkin spice season is back But at nectar juice bar It's getting a clean

Eat shit with that clean nonsense A clean elevated makeover Launching September 2nd On the nectar app In October 1st At Locations Nationwide There's a whole month where you walk in, you're like, let me get that pumpkin.

They're going to be like, what the fuck are you talking? No, that's a digital pumpkin. Step outside, get on the app. We're not going to help you for a month. That's the case. They're made from real pumpkin and nutrient-wrench ingredients. Never sugary syrups or artificial substitutes. But I like those things.

Hold on. I like those make pumpkin taste good. Without that, pumpkins gross. Can we bring our own artificial sweeteners from home, please next? Yes. We don't like the pumpkins. No, we're not called pumpkin drink. It's called pumpkin spice the shit you add to the pumpkin to make it palatable.

Available through December 1st. Oh, got it. Thank you. I can never remember how long fall. When fall stops, yeah. This limited time menu features, uh, it delivers cozy fall flavor with a wholesome functional twist. Crafted to fuel the season. What?

Crafted to fuel the season. to fuel the season in your cup. Crafted to fuel the season. Can we this collection balance is indulge it? Unless I'm mistaken, the second use of functional. Yeah, yeah. It's catching on. Yes.

Describing an edible thing. Yeah. It's cool. It's a wholesome way to enjoy pumpkin spice any time of day. Capturing all the, because I know when I try to enjoy pumpkin spice sometimes, I'm like, oh, you bad boy. I should be enjoying pumpkin spice right now. Do you guys remember when, like, two, years ago people were like talking about how sweet potato was going to be the new thing was the sweet

potato was going to take over and people were talking about how like you get that sweet potato latte that's what but then pumpkin came back strong the next year like yeah the fuck out of here yeah that sucks sweet potato can't can't can't can't can't can never can't it can't come at the that's such a bummer i love hey listen i love that stuff man i know what you're saying though how is it possible that nectar juice bar could justify including pumpkin on their menu well here's the answer. Pumpkin spices everywhere this time of year, but too often, it's all sugar and no substance.

At nectar juice bar, we're committed to doing things differently. By using real pumpkin and nutrient dense ingredients, we've created a fall menu that feels indulgent, but actually supports our guest's health and wellness goals. It's pumpkin season the way it should be,

real, fresh, and truly delicious. I really appreciate these brands that help us to really keep an eye on the artificial shit and the sugar that gets like added to our drinks and they help us to eat the way that our ancestors

ate, which is get 10 pumpkins and grind them down to a pulp and then drink the slurry. You know how they used to do it. Like our our progenitors, how they used to get a like a bucket full of

produce and just mash it all up and then throw away a lot of it and then drink what's left. If you served up a a gourd slurry at the at the town hall in the middle ages you would be you would be tried for witchcraft you would not make it out of that place this is fucking crazy you can't pretend like this is nature's way just give me a pumpkin to eat just give me a whole pump fuck yeah that's it welcome to sonic here's your whole ass gourd we heated it up for you they gotta cook it or else people will use that as an opportunity to get

their pumpkin without getting out of their car. So you got to cook it. You got to cook it. And then they watch you eat every bite. Crutch this little gourd like a porcupine while we watch. This is my favorite. Bobby's Burgers adds wild mushroom bacon burger and pumpkin spice milkshake

for fall. Bobby's Burgers by Bobby Flay is celebrating fall with two new additions to the menu that captures the spirit of the season. The Wild Mushroom Bacon Burger and Pumpkin Spice milkshake. The Wild Mushroom Bacon Burger features certified Angus Beef, grill the guest choice of medium or well, yada, yada, yada. They never mentioned the milkshake again.

Oh, really? But, yes, they don't. They don't because you might be saying, because the person who they have to get a quote from is Bobby Flay. And he's not going to say shit about this milkshake. Here's what Bobby Flay says. The paragraph before Bobby's quote is this. For the ultimate fall indulgence,

The pumpkin spice milkshake blends rich, velvety custard with warm pumpkin spice. It's top with house-made whipped cream and a dusting of seasonal spice for a cozy, crave-worthy finish. But wait, Bobby Flay, professional chef, how do you justify having pumpkin on the menu? Can't wait. As a chef, I've always drawn inspiration from my travels. This menu takes a cue from the ingredients of the Pacific Northwest. and the inviting flavors of fall. When I spent a year in Halloween town,

I learned all about pumpkin milkshakes. Bobby, are you telling me, as my brother indicates, that this is informed by your travels through fall, your travels through autumnal splendor? You know, like? I would listen to the Bobby Flay, take a train through autumn, through America's autumn land with me.

Come as I I heard this place has some of the best nutmeg So I'm here Looking after the nutmeg You think you could eat in or what an apple picking? Let's do it Bobby won't explain His pumpkin spice

He refuses I cannot imagine that was his call right They probably have been fighting it for years To get a pumpkin spice milkshake on the menu There should just be a sign on the front of every restaurant And it's a sign over the spigot out of which the juice comes out

and they can just turn it so it says pumpkin on it. That's really all I need. Send a letter to everyone in the country and the letter is going to be sent by every food business ever and it's going to say pumpkins start on September 5th and then pumpkins are going to go until December 1st. Thank you. You come out, get your pumpkin stuff

because you know we're going to get it to you. We're going to do it. We're doing it. Raise the flag. Put the flag half-mast. I will know that means it's pumpkin time. And then we can raise it up on December 1st. This is an urgent question.

Today, I was driving to work and realized my breath was not the freshest. While on the highway, I noticed I had a dentist goodie bag in my car, complete with travel-sized mouthwash. Forgetting the basic principles of mouthwash, I decided to take a big gulp. Immediately after, I realized I had no way of disposing said mouthwash. My options are now to swallow the mouthwash, which seems physically impossible, spit it out of an open window while driving 60 miles an hour, or ruin my morning cup of coffee with used mouthwash. Please help. I'm crying. My mouth is burning. That's for emergency in the Midwest.

Ah, you got to us just in time. Yeah. This is our first ever live sent in a recorded question. Don't spin out the window. I've made that mistake before. It goes in the back. It just blows right back in. I want to be tender and gentle, gentle parent here. Okay. I do need to, I need you to accept the fact that you fucked up.

Yeah. There's a certain amount of ownership that I feel like you do need to take. of the situation of you did a bad you did a bad thing and you fucked up for it and because of that you're gonna there will be a consequence the consequence is the backseat gets it minty fresh the coffee gets ruined or you swallow it which you can do like you can get that down it's not physically impossible you shouldn't not good but there's a consequence for your action there's a fourth option but i don't know if it's better because the there had to be a container that the mouthwash was in.

Now, I recognize that that container is little and has a tiny... Hard to funnel it in there. ...orifice. You're going to try to spit back in. It's going to go everywhere. No way, you won't be able to do it because the air... Yeah. Because the size of it as you're trying to...

You won't be able to get the air. You know what I'm saying? You almost had to drink the air, drink it all. Yeah. You're almost had to put the entire bottle. Why did you do this? Why'd you fucking do this? You fuck up so bad. It's so wild to me that you were trying to get all, like, high and mighty about road safety now.

While you were rooting around in your car for, I'm sorry, that dentist bag was not, like, in your line of sight. There's no way it was propped up in the passenger seat. No way. And did you one hand that lit off? Nope. I bet you didn't. You waved bye-bye to road safety a long time ago. Let's just get this thing done.

All right? Let's just get past this. This is why you shouldn't clean your car out too much. You know what I mean? Because, listen. You never know when you're going to have to MacGyver a situation like this. And there's an old mug in the glove box or whatever. Boom, solved.

How did you escape the car after it crashed into the lake? Well, I used one of the many rock hard fig Newton's with a single bite taken out of them that it had been filed to a sharp point. And I used that to break the glass and save my family. Couldn't have done it without you, guess. Here, I was stranded here on this tiny island when I crashed off a bridge onto this island. And the only way that I was able to signal was by collecting all over. the discarded Wendy's toys

that my kids are very excited about for 30 seconds and burn them and the fumes made such a strange color in the sky that people knew that I needed rescue. I bound my wounds with the very old silly putty that had been glonked into the door stop.

There's another solution and it's you fucking finish your drive while you rock with that spicy juice in your mouth until you get to the parking lot. Oh, man. I don't know. What happens in the first in the nature? Oh, it'll be fucking hard, but you're going to come through the other.

That's like a fucking life-changing ordeal at that point. If you can keep that spicy juice in your mouth until you park it and then you spit, and the whole day you're going to have a sort of like vacant expression on your face. What the cleanest breath? The cleanest breath. What if something happens and if you hold it in there for long enough, it like bonds and you become forever? fresh. Like, what if they're like... That's the dream, dude. You know what I mean? Like, what if there's

like something happens where you're like fresh forever? If there was, if we had that technology, I would like to think I would have heard about it at this point. It's going to hurt. It's going to suck. You got to, you're not going to hear about the latest developments unless you're reading popular mechanics. Or wire cutter.

Wirecutter. I don't know what wire cutter does. They review toilets. Oh. Vacuums. Yeah. They tell you which toilet vacuums are the good ones. Could you spit it just into the cup holder? Bad news, Trav, they all suck. Yeah, that's how every one of them goes. Just spit it in the cup holder.

No, wait, can we get, Griffin, you didn't. Let's try again. Bad news, they all suck. Yeah, they're not great. So anyways, just put it in the cup holder, and then you could shove some paper towels in there later. Yeah, there's a lot of places in your cart. You can get a little bit wet.

That's a good point, Trave. Spit it on the fucking floor mat, and you can just clean that up. I'm saying a cup holder's designed to like... Spend it on your shirt. No. Spin it on your shirt. You're missing my point. Spin it on your shirt.

Wash your shirt later. We're all fucking meat, man. Who gives a shit, dude? No, what do you need a drink in your nasty face? I know, but I say the cup holder holds liquid if a cup burst open. Let it try. What if he ate? What if he's,

tell your boss, like, yeah, my face is wet. We're all meat. Fuck off. I'll clean it later. Yeah, that's true. What if he feels a cup holder was spit and needs to piss in it like to the fucking animal. That's why there's two. Oh, my mom up frying.

Yeah. Take your shoe off and spit in there, walk around with one sloppy shoe. Fill your shoe with piss. Like Andy DeFrain. And then drop it out in the yard. They said, did you spit it in both shoes? Say, no, I spit my mouth washing in one shoe and I pissed in the other because we're all meat and it doesn't fucking matter. I'll clean them later.

I'd like a raise, please. We didn't even need to introduce P into the question. That wasn't one of the, like, it wasn't a parameter. It's like also P is part of this. Hey, if you don't think that's the concern. if you accidentally swallow mouthwash is like, if it burns that much in my mouth how is this going to feel later?

Yeah, dude. Yeah. It's good. Feel bad. In my sensitive urethra? You know, Travis has your erythro sensitivity issues. Yes, my urethra needs a little respect.

Stop. Don't. Thank you so much for listening to our podcast. We hope you've enjoyed it. I've always taken great care of us. You've always been there for us. We're happy to be here for you and your time of need. Hey, we're so excited.

We're back on the road. Can't wait. The shows are going to be amazing. We're going to be in Austin and San Antonio. We don't know what those guys were saying earlier, but we are really excited. That was Act 1, Travis, Justin and Griffith. This is, I'm going to be healthy as hell for you, Texas. Yes.

If you have questions for the NB&BAM shows or if you have a fear you want to read, you can send that to NBMBAM at maximum fun. and put the city you'll be attending in the subject line. Austin is Taz versus Hercules. It's going to be a hoot and a half. And later this year we're coming to Utah and California, you can get tickets for all the shows at bit.ly

slash macroy tours. The ticket links and information are there. Hey, we got some new merch up in the merch store over at macroymerch.com. There is a rad garrul shirt that was designed by Lynn Doyle. It's one of my favorite shirt designs we've had up in a really long time. And 10% of all merch proceeds this month will

be donated to Equality, Florida, which is dedicated to securing full equality for Florida's LGBTQ community. I want to let folks know, Champions Grove is going to be back for its third year. Tickets are going on sale in early November. You'll see more information or you can follow at Champions Grove on Instagram and get all the information there and see a lot of fun clips from previous years and find out what it's all about. Thank you. Or go to championsgrove.com. Thanks. Thank you. Montaigne for the use for our theme song, my life is better with you. That's all I really wanted to say. Montane is a good one, and I'm very, very grateful that they have a lot of us to use this

very good song as our introduction for So thank you, Montaigne. Who shall read The Fear This Week? Not me. Okay. I'm scared enough as it is. Griffin, you do it. This year, I'm going to be faster than my fear of sitting in a theater box because that's where Lincoln was assassinated. My name is Justin McRoy

I'm Travis McRoy I'm Buckback This is my brother My brother me, kiss your dad's square on the lips It's better with you My life Oh, oh, ah, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, it's better It's better with you

My life Oh, oh, oh, it's better with you Because it's true Oh, it's better. It's better with two. By the way. Ah, ah, ah, it's better with you. Maximum Fun.

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