My Dad Wrote A Porno - Footnotes: Dialect Coach

Episode Date: July 14, 2021

Jamie finally gets some professional help for his many accents from a real life dialect coach. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello everybody and welcome to my dad wrote a porno the footnotes now one of the most divisive parts of this show are my accents I don't know about divisive everybody I've pulled on the matter absolutely hates them. Yeah, it's very much a unified front. Yeah, well, we had Samara Weaving on earlier on in the season and she was shocked to hear that I'd never used a dialect coach. I think she was trying to suck up to you.

But I thought, what if I did? The possibilities are endless. Talk about too little, too bloody late. So we've managed to find a dialect coach who is a fan of the show. And willing to put their name to you. Okay, so her name is August Rain and we're going to call her right now. The most rocky name I've ever heard in my life. That has to be made up.

Okay, so let's call her. Hello? Hi, is that August? Yes, it is. Hey, it's Jamie, James and Alice here from My Dad Wrote a Porno. We need your help. Oh, I'm so glad you called. I'm so happy to help you. Thank you. Where are we talking to you from right now? I'm in Chicago, Illinois. Chicago. We came to Chicago last year. We did. I know, I saw you. I saw you guys like right before quarantine, like right before we had to shut down to the point where I was like,

oh no, things are closing. Should I go? And then I was like, yeah, I should. So live porno was the last thing you went to before the world shut down? Yeah, Belinda's Dirty 30 birthday was the last thing that I did before I had to basically lock up inside my house.

You were one of the unlucky ones, August. I beg to differ. I think it was great. Well, August, the reason we've got you on is to talk about Jamie and his... Problem. His plethora of accents. And I mean, so you're a dialect coach. How long have you been a dialect coach? And what does that actually involve? Who you work with how do you teach so i am a dialect coach i've been doing this really for since i was 14 so 14 sorry august sorry sorry sorry you started being a dialect coach at 14 that's just being a precocious kid well i was not 14 but 17 now that i'm thinking

more you know now that I'm oh now the truth comes out August now the truth comes out sizable difference I'd say if they don't pick me up on it I'll pretend I was a prodigy well exactly I'm used to you know me and Jamie were just child prodigies we're used to being in the theater at very young ages you know things come quickly to us sure sure And do you teach professional actors or amateurs as well, like Jamie? Excuse me, I'm a seasoned pro. He's a semi-professional. He's a semi-professional. I would say I do both. So I talk to actors that are auditioning for things. When you have an audition, you get like a side, you know, you get like a script. Jamie knows this, of course, I don't have

to explain to him. But when you have to sing for something, you get a side and then they tell you, you know, hey, send this in by tonight and, you know, have a South Boston accent or something ready to go for it. And a lot of people don't know how to do that on their own. That's really difficult. That was kind of what Samara was telling us

in one of the previous footnotes is that you just get sent it and like, who do you run the lines with? Or like, who helps coach you at home if you've got nobody about? Exactly if you have no idea you're on your own because that's the thing you know when you i mean i'm thinking of recent things like mayor of east town and how much kate wins it's been lauded for the specificity of that was that philadelphia that accent and it was just so specific to like the zip code almost like do you help with that

baby steps christ jamie let's not worry too much about getting a postcode a continent would be good i love it yes actually so so fun fact about dialects or accents in general there is no standardized accent at all so there's no one way of saying something that is correct or not correct other than the ones that people you know sort of impose on themselves arbitrarily so i can't be wrong this is a jail free card jesus exactly i was gonna say there are no wrong accents there are better accents than some okay but there are generally speaking no wrong accents because people are made up of their experiences who they talk to what they hear blah blah blah all of that stuff and you know regionally where they're from where the people around them are from environmental factors oh my gosh i could go on so why get a

bloody dialect coach then august because not everybody can do just whatever accent they're asked to some people can't hear it some people can't physically make it with their mouths we can't all do it alice. You're living testimony to that. It is true, though, because my real accent is kind of an amalgamation of lots of different accents. You've tried to be posh over the years. Yeah, exactly. You used to have a very thick Manchester accent.

I did, exactly. And now you say grass and bar. And font. And font. Except I don't really, because sometimes I'll just drop a short A in there. It's a very inconsistent accent. So I guess that's what you're talking about August like real people have have an affected accent range

really yes absolutely yeah and like I sound delightful but I I'm not trying to I just I just do you should hear what happens when she turns that mic off all right shall we go down pub actually no that's not you as well that is a good example because, August, I wanted to ask you about one of the most controversial accents in Jamie's repertoire. I'm talking about Bella. Bella, yes. She is controversial.

She is controversial. I love Bella. I love her accent. I think it's just as messy as she is. And that's perfect. I mean, I wasn't really trying. Like,lla is someone that i just conjured out of in fact you know i actually blame thomas middleditch a lot for bella's actually um but increasingly she just sounds like a baby now you've just made her sound like an essex baby she sounds like she has okay so this is very specific

bella sounds like she has what's called a wet mouth. Do you know what I mean? Which is not necessarily, like, a colloquialism. But, like, you know people who, like, love yogurt and ranch dressing and, like, white creamy substances all over? And then they just have, like, slobber on their mouth a lot? White creamy substances around her mouth? Well, that's

bella it's just not yogurt wet mouth i love it bad case of wet mouth so bella's got wet mouth um what what accents of um jamie's do you think he really nails what where do you think he's like you know he's really got hit the nail on the head okay so the accents that i absolutely love i wrote down i even wrote down bella So I wrote down, I like made a list and I put down Bella because I think part of accents are being, you know, appropriate to the character as well as the accent, right?

Yeah. It's holistic. So there's Bella. And then I love Get a Mind List and Frostbust. I love her. Oh yeah, thanks, Beth. She's my favorite. Do you know what?

I had so much fun doing it because i've got a lot of friends from liverpool particularly my mother's friends from liverpool so i've grown up with that one i love her she's so good garamima st frost first of course herself probably a dialect coach oh of course because she works at the royal academy of drama and stuff yes she's a vocal chameleon she's an international woman of mystery. Well, exactly. August, go on. Who else is he really getting right?

Okay. The first time that we heard him, it wasn't so good. But then Jim Sterling really came out of the woodwork. Pardon the pun. But I like Jim Sterling. And as being somebody who's from Texas, I don't mind him. I really enjoy him. So that's improved as time's gone on.

Okay. Yes. Jim Ster as time's gone on. Okay. Yes. Jim Sterling has gotten much better, and he adds a different sort of Western energy to the book, which is nice. Can you remind us of Jim Sterling, Jamie? So, yeah, he was from out the Texas way, wasn't he, Jim Sterling? And he used to go and he walked around his place of work,

which was some kind of oil field in texas and then his old man mate at the helicopter yeah he had virgil and and hank skank was a bit more he had a bit more zest to him didn't he oh yeah that's nice yes i love hank skank hank skank was the best he's really good you're hank skank it also started out rough but you found it i do tend to kind of find my way eventually unless they just disappear after one chapter which is what happened with like petra i never really got petra this is the thing i suppose you're saying as well august like sometimes you know it's about being memorable it's about encapsulating something it might not be the most

convincing where was petra from um germany sure so she's not necessarily the most convincing where was Petra from um Germany sure so she's not necessarily the most convincing German but my god does she stay with us yeah I think German's actually one of Jamie's weakest yeah I mean lest we forget recently when he did uh Mr. Hushman especially with the high pitch mouse voice yeah I mean it was a it was a mess I really wish dad hadn't set the book so much in Germany. Speaking of which, August, is there anyone that you think Jamie could do with improvements on? Yes. Okay, I do.

So I wrote down Petra, definitely, because Petra's a good one. I love Petra. It's certainly memorable, yes, like you said, Alice. But I don't know if she's from Germany good point but I do have some tips and tricks for a few different dialects so I'll get to those in a moment don't worry you're not you're not out of luck okay so when Spooner was alive and he had to be Boston undercover I was concerned for you Boston is so hard that's like one of the hardest ones. And Boston undercover. Yeah. What help can you give me?

Because that is a hard accent. Yeah. My tip and trick that I do for Boston. Okay, hold on. Let me preface this. Anytime you do a US accent, something that will help you is leaning and lingering. So you want to lean and linger on all those consonants and like really lean into them

and punch the ones that you really want and then like throw away the ones that don't matter at all lean linger and punch august how do you know what to lean and linger on though it's based on stress and the thought of the line i mean we're really stressed when he's doing these accents so will that help it gives me stage fright. I'm always like, oh God, they're going to lampoon it. What's going to happen here? But in dialects, you got to be wrong and be loud because we can't know if it's wrong unless you're loud.

So sing out. Sing out, Louise. I'm going to do it. If that's the advice, Jamie's been doing it right the whole time. Wrong and loud. Honestly, if we could silence him, we would. Wrong and punch i mean it's fantastic yes so we're leaning we're lingering what else are we doing okay so for boston i like to sing this song and it helps me get into it and so this is the take me out to the ball game song all right so sing a line after me

and it's just to pretend just to mimic and see so I'm going to do exactly what you do, August. Okay. Take me out to the ball game. Take me out to the ball game. That's good. Take me out with the crowd. Take me out with the crowd. Very good.

Just buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack. Just buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack. Just buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack. Nice. Not bad. I don't care if I never get back. In your register. Not quite. I don't care if I never get back.

That's good, Jamie. That's very good. And you could drop some R's. You could even lose some R's in there. So like Cracker Jack. Oh, that's good. Drop that R on Cracker. Cracker. Cracker. Let's do it again, August. Cracker Jack. Cracker Jack. Yeah. There you go.

And then I don't care if I never get back. Never get back. I don't care if I never get back. Never get back. It's not bad. There's something bad. And see, you're leaning and lingering on that never get back. I don't care if I never get back. I don't care if I never get back. Good. It's not bad. There's something there. And see, you're leaning and lingering on that never get back. I don't care if I never get back. I don't care if I never get back.

Yeah. Okay. I don't care if he never comes back. I like to do that. I don't want him back. So this is great for a musical. I don't care if I never get back. What if I'm not required to sing?

So if you're not required to sing, I just use it as a warm-up. Oh, okay, I see. So you just, like, remember what the accent is. Like, if, you know, you have a chapter coming up with a bunch of different accents, you can be like, okay, wait, let me think about this. Take me out to the ballgame, take me out with the... Okay.

Take me out to the ballgame, take me out... Can you imagine him in the corner? Take me out to the ballgame for Take me out with the... Okay. Take me out to the ballgame. Take me out... Can you imagine him in the corner? Take me out to the ballgame. Like double speed. Amazing. Okay, so that's Boston. Oh, sorry, Boston's done. Well, I mean, we could go deep into it,

but I have some German tips and tricks if you want help on your German. I think German is a priority given the book. And also let's not throw good money after bad by lingering on Boston, shall we? I was leaning and lingering. You were leaning and lingering. So good. You did really good. So in my experience learning German, what helps me, I have to think about German being very upright. Like my body has to be very upright. Oh, okay. We're sitting straight. Get into it. Okay. Now, when I do German, I have to hold my hand behind my head.

Literally, like I make a wall behind my head. Okay. So I put my hand behind my head and I kind of push my head into my hand. Okay. And then I do it from there. So it's kind of like you're nice and tall and then you can keep your mouth a little smaller, like held a little bit. All I'll say is this is difficult if it's a film smaller like held a little bit all i'll say is this is difficult if it's a film role yeah it's very specific characterization is it head

head on hand yes well you gotta start somewhere right baby step so the character just very relaxed he's leaning against things all show so i have to almost push against that wall and i was like when we were talking about I was like what is that if there's some sense of a wall and then I was like oh I'm so dumb the Berlin wall there's a wall there well there was yeah right there probably still is in these books actually so yeah yes but technically it might actually still be in this reality so we're pushing against the Berlin wall yeah kind of pushing backwards against the berlin wall and then think almost kind of monotone right and they go

see like in german you see a vowel you obey the vowel so you just see what's on the page and like pronounce it and go across and then and when the sentence ends you end and you move on like a typewriter okay so i'll get get a line from the book to practice with. How about Petra? Yeah, because she's German, supposedly. Okay, watch it, August. Okay, so I've got some Petra lines. So she says, hello, I am Petra, Hairbish's personal assistant.

Right, so put your hand behind your head and sit up nice and tall and don't move your lips too much. You can almost have like a very small little smile. So you can pull the back of your lips back a little bit. Okay. And then, and your tongue will be, you know, nice and cupped in your mouth. Okay. So let's do, let's do hello.

I am Petra. So I've got my hand against my head and I'm going to have a small smile, closed mouth and a tongue that's, what was it, looped? Cupped. Cupped. And you're leaning against the Berlin Wall. Oh, yeah. Hello, I'm Petra.

Oh my God, how's it worse? It did get worse. Her bitch is supposed to assist us. What on earth are you doing? This is amazing. Okay. Is it, is it August? Go a little bit faster but how do you feel tell me what you're noticing honestly kind of ridiculous um he looks a bit like he's trying to do a sexy pose with his hand behind his head it almost sounds very like dutch like hello it

does that doesn't help me because i can't do that either. So could you do it? And then I'll try and copy you. Absolutely. So that's a very good try. And so good. You're hearing and changing new things with your mouth. That's amazing. Oh, thank you.

So I like to think of it as held. So I have to keep my mouth a little bit closed. And so this is just me closing my mouth a little bit. Like there's less movement in my jaw. It's not going down as much. Okay. I pay a little more attention to if it helps you, you can put your hand, your other hand underneath your chin.

So you've got one hand behind your head and the other hand under your chin. So you can do that and it'll help you keep the space pretty small in your mouth. Hello. From there. Okay. Hello. Hello. My name is Petra. Yeah. My name is petra yeah my name is petra

i'm herbicious personal assistant hello my name is petra i'm herbicious personal assistant hello my name is petra i am the herbicious personal assistant hello i am petra herbicious personal assistant why are you putting the silly voice on just try okay sorry you could do it more monotone so it's like one note instead because you're doing like yeah try that okay but in my just normal voice normal voice oh and we'll build it from there you're you're going to like lesson 100 before you've even worked out to move your own mouth okay hello my name is petra her vicious personal assistant very good actually, actually. Better. Not German, but much better than the original.

August? Much, much better. Yes, absolutely. And then from there you build and you go. You add another brick to the Berlin Wall and it just keeps going. I like that you're adding bricks to the Berlin Wall when everybody else is taking it down. But yeah, I get the metaphor. So how do I take it up an octave then so that it's a woman's voice so if you wanted to take it up an octave you sure can and you can

make it you don't even have to take it up an octave because that's like high you could just um sometimes you can change the character or change the gender of the character that you're playing based on pitch but um i almost kind of like to think of it like an atmosphere. Well, so in the way that Jamie currently is creating a bad atmosphere, could he do it a different way? Well, it'd be nice if it had a supportive atmosphere, Alice. That would be nice. I guess if something like the Duchess,

it's more of a mood than an accent, isn't it? It's breathy. Yes, absolutely. Very much very much that's exactly exactly she's got a nice deep voice but that doesn't mean that she's a man it just means that she's husky you know yeah absolutely i completely agreed august exactly so you can do other ways that you can distinguish between character, you can put it through the nose and make it really nasal. And ways that you can test how nasal it is is you can squeeze your nostrils. And if you feel that your nose is being very, you know, buzzy,

and you hear it, and then you can unsqueeze them, and then you can keep it going through there. Oh, my God, that's actually really quite a good thing to do. Yeah, you've never pinched your nose before. I've never pinched've never pinched my nose i don't think you need to pinch it august is just saying you're not pinching it are you august no you can pinch it to find the placement the nasality like the buzz and then you can release it to try to maintain the sound while it's unsqueezed because you've never seen meryl holding her nose what she does is she is she turns her back to the camera before they say action

even though i've just what is that where is that from it's coming out of the nose but can you do that so that your nostrils are flared and then talk in a different way not not while looking at you um can you pinch your nose together? I don't really know if I can pinch my nose together But this is through the nose Is that better through the nose? Well this is something to you Maybe I should have someone that's through the nose

Does it just say that in the book That it's speaking through the nose Maybe you should read a chapter in that voice Should I do a whole episode through the nose? It's a whole character though Look how it's actually, it's a real person. See?

See how it can transform? Oh, I am transformed. That is true. Do you know what, August? I've transformed from being in one of the worst moods I've ever been in to being in a fantastic mood.

So more of nasal lady, please. That's good. I love that. That's my favourite. Okay, August. Yes. I think what we've learned from today is that i probably don't have a future on the stage or the screen uh or really in podcasting for much longer certainly not the airwaves um so i think maybe if i had like longer and if we could have some one-on-one lessons maybe i could get half decent but what you've really proved to me is that it is a skill and that you have to hone it it's a craft

you can't just walk into it and expect to be good right off the bat exactly it's it's just like choreography right if you came into a room and somebody showed you a dance routine that they wanted you to do you wouldn't be able to do it immediately just like they did it right after seeing it it takes practice and did it right after seeing it. It takes practice and breaking it down and to be like, oh, this is actually what this is. And then you can make it pretty and make it artful after that.

Well, doing the German was a dance routine by the time you got your hand on your head and your hand on your chin. Because I think what I do is I kind of run before I can walk. I try and infuse it with personality before I've built the Berlin Wall. So really, I need to be more like the German Democratic Republic in my approach and build the wall and then do as Reagan said and knock it down. I don't know if I like the metaphor that we

all keep using. But yes, I mean, certainly a wall is what we're building. And Jamie is unceremoniously knocking it down. August, thank you so much for all your help. Jamie, unfortunately, is a bit of a lost cause. I think in the effort to professionalise him, we've actually made him worse. There's a charm to amateur dramatics, that's what you're saying. I would agree.

I would agree. But if you ever need any help or if you ever get stuck or there's an accent that's like, wow, this is really, I have nothing. I have no words. I will help you get your foot in the door and help you figure it out

would you take him out to the ball game yes I sure will August I'm going to buy you some cryo crew giant and say a massive thank you so much

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