My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark - 121 - Clomp Everywhere

Episode Date: May 17, 2018

Karen and Georgia answer listener questions in this special Q&A episode. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We at Wondery live, breathe and downright obsess over true crime and now we're launching the ultimate true crime fan experience, Exhibit C. Join now by following Wondery, Exhibit C on Facebook and listen to true crime on Wondery and Amazon Music, Exhibit C. It's truly criminal. And big win. And big win, the Q and A, Apple Floor. White now. Oh, gosh. Should we start off? Yeah. Stephen just, like I said, no. Stephen said no, don't start over. I don't think we're, yeah. He, you like Elmer Fudd? You like the Elmer Fudd intro? That made me laugh. All right. Well, let's leave it in. Then what is Stephen like? Let's leave it in. Can you do fake drunk this entire episode? Yes, this is Q and A. Is there, shh, shh, shh. This is not a secret.

Always a secret with that girl. Always leaning in with her weird breath. I have to tell you something. And then I had to tell you something. I threw up earlier. I threw up and I took a nap and came back to the bar. What? Did you get away from me? I should do, sorry, I just had this idea. What if I did a one woman show where it's me and drunk me from the 90s? Switching off. And it's like the spotlight goes up. Yes, exactly. Or it's just like, why did you feel the need to escape into the bottle every night? Sorry, what are you talking about? I was thirsty. You used to party and now he's, what do you like? Can you, I want you to, let's, let's keep going with this. Okay. I want you to record the, I won't record sober current Karen. Okay. And so that, you know,

we don't, the switching will get too confusing. Okay. So we just have recorded Karen. And then drunk Karen, old Karen is in person there. So you're saying get to drink again. Just because it's a show and it's not my fault. And it wasn't my idea. Fake drunk Karen. Okay. Is there again? Great. Okay. What is her hair? Did you have her hair in a ponytail? Did she wear a ponytail? She's just cut bangs. Hold on. It looks good. You don't know. You don't know. Yeah. All right. Sorry. I would, drunk Karen was the kind of person who would cut bangs so short that the next day when I would first see people who would, I would be premiering my bangs like at the gap, people will be like, Oh, Oh, wow. Like, yeah. Shocking bangs back. They would back up.

They were mental hospital bangs. They were like, I found a razor in the bathroom and I gave myself a trim. Like what I did to Barbie when I was four was like, Barbie needs fucking bangs and all you did, you basically just shaved her head in the bang area. Yes. Just shaved the bangs. The more you cut Barbie's hair, the more you liked cutting Barbie's hair until you were down to the plugs. Yes. Till it was like, well, now Barbie is a skinhead. Because Barbie has to be a fucking racist skinhead. She's a racist anyway. And she's always on a goddamn tiptoes. Let's shave this bitch's head. God. We're in Europe right now. Guys, bonjour. Bonjour. For some reason, Karen wants to be in Paris really badly. Paris, France is what Europe is to me. We're in the UK and Europe. So we're in

the pod lofts, technically. Right now. Technically, we're in the pod loft. In our time. You know what's funny though? We, we, I don't think we need to be so constrained by the concept of time. Since people listen to the shit out of order anyway. Time, space, location, all of this shit. You know what? It's, it is all just human construct. It's a bucket. It's the government. Let it go. It's aliens. The clock is aliens. Let it go. Alien government. The government of Mars. It's the government trying to put their shit on you. And like, I refuse to tell you like, told what time it is by the government. Who's saying this government thinks smarter than me? It's not smarter than me. Okay. I love him. So we're doing. There's always crying about some random person. Being in

love with someone. Being in love with someone that the friend I'm talking to is like, I don't think you've ever talked about this person before. I don't, I don't know who you're talking about right now. No, I love him. I'm like talking about the bouncer. Then then you trade a piece of clothing with some other drunk girl. Whatever happened to you? I was at a drunk girl demand that we switch belts and I was just like, okay. You have to go at that drunk improv. Yeah. It's, it's so much easier because if you tell a drunk girl who wants to switch belts with you, did she think it was funny? Because I would do that. I would get these ideas. I was like, switch out. Isn't this hilarious? I had one time, it's all my friends. This is when I lived in Sacramento. I was like,

you guys, I'm going to order grasshopper. No, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. It was like a mint. Have you ever had a grasshopper? It's like a blended drink. Yeah. I just pictured you on Amazon ordering grasshoppers, insects, live grasshoppers. I'm going to give both constricted. No, I'm going to. Anyway, I, that's how I got my first pair of Doc Martens though. Is that a party, a drunk girl? Switched. When I was like 13. I was like, give me your fucking, I had like climbing boots on. Yeah. That I hated. And she gave me her purple docs. I know. Why? Because she was drunk? Because she was drunk and stupid. And like, she's like a basic bitch. You had pre, you had like broken in purple docs. Yep. Eight hole broken in purple docs. Congratulations. Change my life. Yeah.

Best shoes I've ever had. Why didn't I keep them? Okay. The first time you start wearing combat boots as a girl in your 20s, I'm telling you, if you hadn't had the experience, if you're a girl who's like, I need to curl the bottoms of my hair and always wear some version of a heel. God bless. Yeah. I get the comfort. That's your style. What I'm saying is take a summer off, get a job, two towns over and just start wearing flannels and fucking combat boots. Just see what it feels like because I'm telling you, there is something about lacing up a boot and having that thing of like, oh, you can't kick me in the toe. And you start to call them shit kickers. And then you feel like a fucking badass. Yeah. And it's the best. And you just sort of like,

you get real down to business. Yeah. You clump everywhere. You clump. It's very tank girl, but wherever you live. Yeah. But you're so cute. Don't worry. You're so cute. There's so much cuteness available. They all know this. Yeah. These are people who are like, yeah, we're from now. We have the internet. We know how fashion works. All right. Let me ask you a question. Finally. Karen, this is a question from Lisa. Lisa? Lisa. Okay. Have you ever done an escape room? No. Me neither. No. I have no interest. Let's do it. Okay. Like force ourselves to do it somewhere. Yeah. I mean, I think it's an interesting concept and I've heard people talk about it. There were people remember when we were at the St. Patrick's Day party at Joe's,

there were people leaving to go to an escape room and the way they described it sounded fun. To me, like you're leaving a party where you just hang out and talk and drink to go escape from a room. Yeah. That's like, that's what you're doing right now. You just, it doesn't make sense to me. Yeah. Why don't you, you know, you could do, if you're at a party you've never been at this apartment before, let me run ahead. I'll lock some shit up and now just try to leave this party. I'll try to, I'll stop you all along the way. Here's my thing. I don't want to do things and I don't want to do activities in public where you can succeed or fail. Right. And it's a panic to fucking succeed. Succeeding as a time limit. Yeah. And so maybe you and Vince should do an escape room

or a karaoke room when we're in Europe. I will 100% do both of those with you because here's what will happen in the escape room. Vince will take over and be so fucking hilarious that we'll just stand there laughing while he takes care of it for us. Yeah. And we won't care. Right. So we'll never escape. I mean, also I do have, there is a lot of faith in the idea of an escape room because all it's going to take is one lunatic to run one of those where suddenly it's not a game. Right. And you're actually locked into a weird room. Oh, you're thinking of like the next Saw movie. I'm, I've just written them. I've written Saw 11. I believe it's called escape room. Escape room. Okay. You want me to ask you more? No, let me ask you one. Go ahead. I think

we should go back and forth. Okay, great. Let's see. Just pick one at random. Don't even read it. Okay. Advertisers or desserts, Georgia? Advertisers 100 forever for the rest of my life. Really? That was from Mindy, by the way. Mindy, I should have said her name first. Mindy, I need to tell you that my favorite food is happy hour. And that's all I want is appetizers. And what's your, what would you say your number one, two, one, two and three appetizers would be? Like at a normal place or if I could like have my dream appetizer? Let's say the scene will set for you as you're at the fanciest restaurant you would want to go to for like your birthday. Okay. And that would be? Oh, shit, man. Or any day type. Okay. Like, I guess Tamo shantern over here.

That is the fanciest restaurant. That's all I care about. That's awesome. Okay, here's what I want. I don't care where it is. I want a fucking on point cheese plate. Yes. Like the on pointiest fucking cheese plate with honey and the one we got in Cleveland. Yes. That was the best. Oh, you know what else I want? Many fucking corn dogs, fancy corn dogs. We should find out what that restaurant's called. We went to a restaurant in Cleveland. It was a brew pub and it had all these items. Go ahead. And then just like, uh, deviled eggs. Oh, yes, you love a deviled egg. That's all. That's my three. Like, I just want that for dinner every night. That might be too high in cholesterol for you. Okay. Uh, dessert or appetizers? What my answer

is 100% dessert. Okay. I mean, I, not that I don't love a good appetizer, but I do am the person who truly, I don't talk about the fact that I'm saving room for dessert. I'm just doing it. But I'll only base it on if I know, there's nothing more interesting when you're the only one that wants to get dessert. Come on, we'll split it. And everyone's just staring at you and like, I'm paleo. But my favorite thing is when everyone gets dessert, even when the staunchest paleoist break down and get like one scoop of the thing. And then they're like, this is the craziest thing I've ever had. That's what life's all about. We've been living in Los Angeles for way too long. Everyone is a thing. Everyone is a fucking gluten-free, paleo vegan, fucking sugar-free,

juicing, juicing, fucking bullshit. Fat flush. Yes. All right. That's, that was mine. So what's yours? Okay. Um, this is a different Lisa. It says different Lisa. And this is another food question. What are each of your favorite cereals? Oh, shit. That's a good question. I love that. These are not murder related. I like it. Coming straight out of the box with those sugar corn pops. Sugar corn, sugar pops. Are they called that? I think now they're called corn pops, right? Those are the ones with the frog. Those are sugar snacks. And those are little weird oat puffed oats. This is puffed corn. Oh, I don't know it. They're bigger. They look like golden nuggets. Ooh. And do they look like, um, what are those things, those things called corn,

aztec corn? That's right. You know those. Oh, yeah. Corn pops. Corn pops. Those are good. That's, I could eat, I'm not kidding, like 13 bowls of those in a row. I can't have cereal in the house because I, when I start to eat it, I love it so much that I can't stop. I think that's a normal thing for people, for like a lot of women. Really? Like they can't have cereal in the house. It's just because you keep on filling up to finish the milk. I know. I know. Oh, I better finish this milk. Whoops, too dry. Better put some more milk in. Mine is, um, raisin nut bran. It's like the most boring. I'm such a nerd. Have you had it though? Is that the one where the raisins are coated in nuts? Yes. That's good. It's actually incredibly sweet. So it's not like, it's a secret

healthy. It's not healthy. I like this though. It's so fucking good. I want to cry. And then like, I'll pour a bowl and eat it and be like, there weren't enough raisin nuts in there. And so I'll pour another bowl to get more raisin nuts. And then there's too many raisin nuts. Right. It's my favorite. I wonder if you shook that box. I shake it every time and it never, it's just always can't redistribute correctly. No, it's my, it's my problem. Uh, regular milk. Um, 2% is what I usually do. Okay. My cousins used to do fat free and it was like, that milk is clear. It's water. That's scary. That milk is blue. And you're not supposed to drink that anymore now. I don't drink milk anymore. But if I do, yeah, I mean, I just don't have it. Yeah. It's like vanilla sugar. Who

cares? Are you going to give us your almond milk order? Yeah. But some fucking poor person's like, I wanted to hear about murder. Do you have a, ask a true cry, ask a murder one. Okay. Could this is from Hillary. This is a fascinating question. Um, could either of you have stayed married to Robert Grace Smith? Robert Grace Smith was the, the cartoonist who worked at the San Francisco Chronicle when they were trying to solve the zodiac killings. The weirdo. And he wrote that book and he's Jake Gyllenhaal in the movies. By the finch. He definitely seemed, I want, you know, you always want to be like, no, it's fascinating. I would have been so interested. He just seemed really, um,

um, emotionally unavailable. Yes. He didn't seem like a warm person. Yes. Yeah. I think, um, I've already had that relationship. And, which was like, what, what, what are the characteristics? It was almost exactly like that where it's a person who's really nice, but has their own interests and is basically feels like they're just living an entirely separate life who doesn't share, doesn't share with you, even if it's an interest you're not interested in. Yeah. Or do you just get sick of it after a while? It's just not when somebody is so kind of dedicated to their own mind. Yeah. It's just, it's really lonely to be with a person like that. Yeah. And I'm too like, I want to be up in everybody's business all the time. For sure. Like,

I don't, I want, I need talking and I need, you know, that kind of thing. And like a Grace Smith, he, there's some, I mean, it was Jake Gyllenhaal, so it was charming, but he was a lunatic. Right. Right. I need more codependency in my relationships. And I'm not even kidding. You need him to need you a little bit more. Yeah. I have a codependent personality, which I thought was a big problem for a long time until my therapist was like, well, you and Vince are interdependent. You're not codependent because it's working out fine for both of you. Yeah. Because you're giving each other what you need. Exactly. So it's okay that like, you're a little a little lunatic about it. Yeah. And so I need someone who needs me more than that. That's right. You know what I mean?

I really do. I like that. Let's see. Relationship goals. Okay. Here's this one. What's your favorite did they, this is from Katie. What's your favorite did they or didn't they murder? Well, if you want to get honest about it, how about fucking Natalie Woods, mysterious death and Robert Wagner and Christopher Walken and how they never talk about that or figure it out. They keep saying, they just said they reopened the case and I was like, tell us everything. Just tell us why. Like what, what would be very cool now is if this next wave of the way crime solving starts to work is that we start to just get the true truth of like, oh, this person paid this person. So it's almost like everything becomes an expose. Oh, well,

so and so paid somebody $100,000. Yeah. Like to actually be able to track bribery, to track all the things and just really know what really happened. Totally. Well, Steven made a good point that we need to bring our recorder with us on our tour because what if the zodiac is fucking found through DNA while we're there and we're just scrambling to scream into our phone to record an episode. That would be, you know, you do have a selfie stick, right? I do. I'll bring it. We need it. That is brilliant. If you're not already on the fan cult and I'm talking in the future, because I think we've decided that while we're on our UK tour, we're going to be posting videos. Now it turns out we're going to be doing with a fucking selfie stick. I think it'll be funny and

fun. I think it's a fucking great idea to do it that way. I'm going to bring a bigger purse just so I can carry it in my big purse. I mean, I have to say, I don't like recording myself in any way, but the idea of us keeping a video log as we travel through Europe in the weirdest, non, it's almost anti-tourism, the way the tours end up going. You like get there, you get to your room, you pass out, you're super tired, you work on your shit, you go to a show, you have this super venue in the backs, in the back of this like weird auditorium with like weird snacks. Oh, and they're going to be especially weird because they're fucking foreign snacks. It's a lot of foreign snacks. Oh, and it's going to be higher quality because like cheese. They

care about human beings. Oh, it's going to be really nice. And no vegetables. No vegetables, please. Okay. Wait, was that you? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We said, did they or didn't they? Oh, yeah. Robert Wagner. Oh, sorry. I don't care. I want that one too. What's yours? Jombonay. I don't care. Oh, Jombonay. Yeah. What if all these oldies just start getting solved? Oh, that'll be fun. That'll be like, that could be the perfect antidote to the Trump administration. Like I already like when Golden State Killer, when they arrest him, something lifted off of me. That was just like, oh, yeah, more of this. Cause it's fair. Finally justice. Yeah. Yeah. It's so unfair that this motherfucker got to hide. Yes. And yeah, that's a good point. Fair. It's finally fair.

Yeah. It's it's going to be even. It's not. Georgia. Yeah. This is from Justine. Justine. Do you believe in astrology? No, you do not. But it's fun. But you don't like believe it's the truth. I think it's really fun. And it doesn't hurt anyone. And I like, I always want to hear my horoscope. If someone's like, oh, I'm going to read my horoscope, fucking read me Gemini. But here's the problem too, is that my sign Gemini, we're fucking known for being batshit bananas, crazy, unreliable, shitty people. And I swear to God, I'm not, and I'm sure every Gemini says this, I'm not like normal Gemini. I know Gemini's. Yes. And they're fucking whack. My mother was a Gemini. Oh,

shit. Oh, no. What was she like? She like me at all? What were they like a little bit opinionated and you know, but yeah, it's just the turns. It's the turns of like, good mood, bad mood or interested, not interested. Not like you don't do it emotionally. You're very steady emotionally. In my opinion, you change your mind a lot. That's true. But that's just not true. That's kind of true. It's kind of true. You know it. To you, Taurus? Yes. Yes. Except for the way they describe Taurus. Taurus. Taurus. They said it like the car commercial. Taurus. The way they describe it is like homebound, earthy, into flowers or whatever. I'm like, you're just describing a cow. That's you're saying what a cow does in the field. But don't

they say you're like, you guys are like, you're the opposite of me where you like make a decision and there's no fucking changing your mind at all. That's right. Stubborn. Stubborn. Super stubborn and super like stick to the plan. Yeah. I don't believe, I guess the thing is I don't believe in astrology. I enjoy it. So I don't believe, you know what I mean? Like, of course, when I meet it, when I meet a dude I'm dating that I'm into, I look up, I'm Gemini's and whatever the fuck go together. Exactly. Find that birthday. Yeah. And everyone does this. I wonder if I bet guys don't do it, but girls do this all the time. Guys don't do it for sure. That's right. You find the person's birthday and then you look up that like Linda Goodman sun sign. So you're like, oh my God,

look at how compatible we are. I will say like Vince is a pretty perfect Leo and which is like a steady fucking reliable, dependable person and it works with my fucking crazy brain Gemini. My sister's a Leo too. Oh, you asked me that one. I did. Okay, so let me ask you one. Sorry, but did I say that was Justine's? Because it was Justine's question. Justine. Justine. It was fun to talk about Justine. Oh, okay. This is from Karina. Do you have any tips for traveling and easing anxiety in strange places? Or should I do a murder one? No, no, that's good. Music. Constantly have music in your ears or something soothing that you enjoy. Yeah, you got to get those wireless air buds. The best. They are worth, I think they're 150 bucks. This is not a commercial. It is not a

commercial. This is like, if you're on old school headphones, you keep walking past a doorknob and ripping them out of your fucking head. The worst. Get those wireless ones. They're little, it just feels like you are in your own world. And then you're, you're able to build your own world a little bit. Yeah. And know that if you, by traveling, if you mean you're nervous to fly on a plane, I just told somebody else this the day I was locked out of my house and I did, I said, ask me anything. You have to remember the one you're flying, you're safer on a plane than you are in your bathroom. Oh my God. You're more likely to get killed in your bathroom than you are on a plane. And you have to watch the, if you start to get nervous or you start, or your mental

kind of storyline starts taking over, just start watching the stewardesses, the air hostesses, whatever the fuck they're called, flight attendants. Flight attendants. Is it flight attendants? I think it's flight attendant. Okay. Is that the newest one, though? I don't know. But they are so calm. They do it all day long. There's, you can always look at them and be like, that's the, that's what I'm supposed to be matching. Yeah. And also they know, if you really start feeling like you're going to have a panic attack or something, if I can tell one of them, they're trained to deal with it. Yeah. Because people do get like, you just don't like to be in a enclosed space. But if you can get some air buds, then you'll be in a weird world inside of your

own head. And then it won't feel like you're just in a plane. My thing for traveling too with anxiety, which I've overcome, because I've had to do it, I've had to travel so fucking much. So I would say travel a lot, but you can't do that. Is, is that I kept realizing that I would be anxious and unhappy and nervous every time I'd go anywhere. And then I'd come back and everything would be fine. And I would be really bummed that I had missed an opportunity to explore and enjoy, you know, where I was and what I was doing. And it's just, I don't, you don't want to live your life being disappointed that your anxiety lets you overtook your life. You know, because I'd be like, the cats are going to die. The house is, I need to get home. And I'd come home and the cats wouldn't

give a shit that I was home. They would for a minute. And then they would be over it. And I'm like, fuck, I wish I really had taken a walk instead of taking a nap because I was overwhelmed. Yeah. You know, and seen Seattle or the fuck. So. And, but I think you're right in that you need the proof. If you have anxiety and then, and it keeps you from doing things, then you get to keep that storyline in your head because you never prove yourself otherwise. Right. Right. But like you were forced to travel. Yeah. We went on tour. Suddenly you're like, this is no big deal. I'm doing it every other weekend. Remember? Yeah. When we first planned the first tour, we were like, we don't want to do that many dates and we

don't want to go that many places because neither of us were that interested. And when he was like, let you guys, you're going to go to Australia. I was like, no fucking way. Yeah. Those are all my reactions. I was like, well, great. I'm going to die on my way to Australia. Of course. I mean, yeah. It's just, yeah. When you have anxiety, it's hard to be. Just know what your brain is serving up to you is normal human bullshit. Right. And it's a lie. It's a lie. And it happens to everybody and you don't, it's not, the alarms aren't going off. It's actually just normal brain processes. And practice for all of this makes perfect because the more you prove to yourself that you're incorrect about what you are worried about, the less you'll

believe it when it comes up again and you'll just blow it off at some point, which is really fucking cool. Yeah. You'll have a new experience and hopefully find someone else, something else to be stressed out about. Right. They're out there. Looking for a better cooking routine? With meal planning, shopping and prepping handled, Hello Fresh has you covered. Hello Fresh makes home cooking easy and affordable so you can stay on track and on budget in the new year. Hello Fresh meals are convenient, seasonal and delicious. Stay cozy all winter long with classic comfort foods available weekly. Why stop with just dinner? Now you can enjoy Hello Fresh's expanded menu of quick lunch solutions, weekend brunch, simple side dishes and amazing desserts.

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I'm Candice DeLong and on my new podcast Killer Psyche Daily, I share a quick 10-minute rundown every weekday on the motivations and behaviors of the criminal masterminds, psychopaths and cold-blooded killers you hear about in the news. I have decades of experience as a psychiatric nurse, FBI agent and criminal profiler. On Killer Psyche Daily, I'll give you insight into cases like Ryan Grantham and the newly arrested Stockton serial killer. I'll also bring on expert guests to dive deeper into the details, share what it's like to work with a behavioral assessment unit at Quantico, answer some killer trivia and even host virtual Q&As where I'll answer your burning questions. Hey Prime members, listen to the Amazon Music exclusive podcast Killer Psyche Daily in

the Amazon Music app. Download the app today. Is it's me, right? Yeah, I think so. Georgia. Yeah. And I don't know if you want to name names or not. Always. But this is from Kelly. If you could go back to high school, which teacher would you tell off? Oh, I don't remember his name, but there was this creepy fucking, probably for the best political science teacher who was like, he was like the poli sci and the fucking football coach teacher, you know? And he like wore a gold chain and had his like, he always wore like, he always wore like khakis and then the like high school logo, like polo button, like polo shirt and would be unbuttoned a little with the hair and like he would flirt with the popular girls. Like they loved him. Sure. And like they would like, I remember

when sitting on his lap for some reason, like he was a creep, but only to the like pretty popular girls, which I clearly wasn't. Not that I wanted his attention, but I was like, from a place of over here, this is fucking wrong and creepy. Yes. And everyone else loved him. There was, you know, the popular kids favorite teacher. Yes. I'm sure he bought them beer. Yeah. Yeah. It's like almost like a weird cult springs up. Well, also, those are those weird moments in when you're growing up and you're kind of like when you, you, you, those lines between popular, unproper or like hot and not hot, they can be blurry for a while because you just don't ever want to know for sure, or you can kind of kid yourself or whatever. But when there are creepy adults that are like hone in

right and it starts to happen to you in your, you know, like when you're 13 and older were suddenly like, you know, you don't have a target on you. So at first you're like, Oh, thank God. And then you're kind of like, I'm invisible. Yeah. And you don't know how to feel about it because it's like, it's so creepy. And yet at the same time, there's something wrong with you. Yeah. It's because, it's because you're not living. It feels like just because you don't know how to live in society the way everyone else does. Right. Like when actually it's like, you're not being targeted by a fucking predator. Yeah. I know there was a girl. Yeah. What about you? We had a teacher, I had a teacher that was, I would just love to go in and be like, you, you have a rage issue. He was like

this insane screamer. And he was not like, I think it was this thing he was on the shorter side. And I think it was a thing of like keeping the class in control. But it would go so far past normal yelling at a classroom full of kids. And people would just be like, like sitting there like rolling their eyes and he would be going, he would be like snapping. And it was in Catholic school, like they don't have to, it's not the same like standards. They can kind of do whatever they want. So they, they were teachers in my high school that were fucking insane. Isn't it crazy to watch an adult lose their temper when you're like younger? Yes. And you're like an adult losing their temper is like funny almost. Yeah. And like, oh God. Well, especially when they're like seething

where you're kind of like, sorry, this is about something else. This doesn't fit. This is not. This is not about chemistry. What's his name? Joseph D'Angelo. I mean, for real, like inappropriate anger where it's like, it's so nice that we're slowly coming into a time where that, that truly is inappropriate. Yeah. Like people go, oh, that's not normal. No, I feel like though, luckily there's more teachers I'd want to go back and thank than I'd want to go back and yes, for sure. Thankfully. Definitely. Okay, let's see here. All right, this is from Rebecca. Which celebrity do you think has murdered someone and use their abundant resources to cover it up? I wanted to be someone I know who it is. Paul Giamatti. How dare you? How dare you? I bet he

has killed multiple people. No, that man is as hard as right on his sleeve. How dare you say that about my sweet baby angel? So are his victims? You know, I would say I think it's someone more like it's like a Vanna White type. You know what I mean? One of those people where they're like head turns on their neck, like they're a weird doll. What about not Pat Sajak? Who's Jeopardy? Alex Trebek. Alex Trebek. I think he's too much of a nerd to kill anybody. Yeah, he just looks like he likes to get dirty. And also, I think it's much more likely that he's going to be killed himself correctly pronouncing a Spanish, like the name of a mission. It really like Viejo and then someone just stabs him in the eye. Villarjo and then he just gets punched in the mustache. Right.

Remember when he shaved his mustache for a while? Georgia, this is from Kelly. What's your dream vacation? Oh, God, a nap. Dream vacation? Dream vacation. I don't know. I really, I just like eating. So hot weather, cold weather. Okay. Hot, warm weather, warm, sunny weather. Beach side or mountains jungle? A little of both. Okay. Kauai. I want to go to Kauai. Nice. There we go. Have you been to that island? No. Have you been to Hawaii? Yeah. I can't believe how Hawaii smells. Oh, it's just tropical. Like you get out of that fucking airport. Well, I've only been to Maui, but we walk out of the airport and you're just like, wait, what's happening? I think I'm going to do it this summer. Do it. Because we've just been traveling so much when we get back from this tour

that we're currently on. Yeah. Right this moment. Yeah, and take a real vacation. Yeah. What do you want to do? Oh, you want to go to Vienna, Venice? Well, I do want to go to Venice, Italy, somewhere with a V. Victorville. Victorville. There it is. Virginia. No, actually Virginia is probably really beautiful. Virginia's for lovers. It is. I want to go to, yes, I want to go to Venice, Italy before it is submerged underwater. Do it. Yeah, I like Italy. Amen. I like Italy. Hey, speaking of Victorville, Kelly wants to know what's your least favorite part about Southern California? God, Kelly, thank you for letting me, let me just open up my book here. Get up on your box. My least favorite part of Southern California is the fact that there are so many, and this was

not where, I think there's more people like this up north now, but it used to be very Southern California thing when I moved here in the 90s. Mothers wearing their daughter's jeans with fucking facelifts trying to act like they too are also still in high school. I find that, and it happens a ton in the San Fernando Valley, I find it to be heart wrenchingly horrifying. Like I find those women, yeah, it's depressing. It's like they want to go back. They're, they're like kind of using their daughter in this weird creepy puppet master way where it's like, do you want to wear this? And they're, it's just, it's so much. The ones who are like, we get confused for sisters all the time. Yes. No, you fucking don't. No, you fucking don't.

A and B, how about you step back? You've already had your fucking 48 years. Step back and let Mackenzie step forward for five fucking seconds. Like that thing is so sick down here. My mom's my best friend. My mom is my best friend. I used to do this in my act, but I had a joke where I said to my mom, I was trying to borrow money from her. So I told her, she was my best friend. And she goes, well, you're not my best friend. She really said that to me. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. You know why? Because she's my mom. Exactly. Not my best friend. Yeah. I'm supposed to have best friends that are my age and my mom has best friends that are her age. And you don't have to wear the same clothes because you're not even in the same realm of life. Yeah. Give it a fucking

break. This question was for you. Thank you for finally asking me that question. What's your answer? I don't care. You're from here. Yeah. So maybe what's your pollution, air quality? Such a hippie. Such a Gemini. The traffic, the traffic in the people. I guess the landscape and the human beings. The disparate, never mind. The disparate life experiences? Yeah. Yeah. Amy asked, who comes up with the titles for the episode? That's a great question. Amy, nice one. Steven, why don't you answer this one for us? Steven, take it. Steven, tell us your process. Walk us through. Walk us through. In my notebook, I write down things that I find funny and interesting. While we're talking. Yes. While you're talking. Not just random thoughts

you have. Just like a diary while you guys during the episode. Beware diary. And then, yeah, I just throw it back your way and we just narrow it down to something that we just makes us laugh, I think. Let's read from last night. Yes. This text you sent us. So we recorded episode, what was the one that was just posted today? 119. So 119, but it'll be one, you know, whatever. So last night, you left so much stuff goes on in these texts. And then you text us options. At 11 p.m. when we were both at that bar last night, Georgia walks up to me mid-party and goes, sorry, sorry, real quick. Oh yeah. Excuse me, Ms. Kilgar. She said important. And I said away. And then she said, no, no, we have to answer this question. So here's a text from Steven. Hey, here's some title

ideas for this week's episode. Episode 119, Fingers Everywhere, which is what we ended up picking. Yeah. Fingers Everywhere. But there was also Sally Holes, Power Day, Day Raccoon, Corn Style, and Reasonable Face. Well, and it's, I feel like my favorite thing when I first started listening to podcasts and people would name a title after something that was said in the episode, it was so, there was like an elation of like when the person finally said it, it was so fucking cool. Because you don't know what it's in reference to. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. I do too. And when we started, we were trying to do those puns that were very fun until we got into the thirties. And then I realized it was just going to be the same numbers. With a three in front of

it? Yes. I feel like we should go back and rename some of those, rename those first episodes. Never. Okay, great. No, it's too late. It's like, it's already in the ether. We can't do anything about it. I just like sometimes I'll see that and I'll be like, what, what does that even mean? Like in episode, what is it? Like 2020? And it's like, what, that's not episode 2020. Why did we name it that? I know. What I love is people, they'll go like, I just listened to Project Artichoke. And I was just like, I don't know what you're talking about. That one took me a while. I totally forgot that's what we named it. And people are being serious about something else we're talking about, but they're using the title. I love it. Like we're like, it's very, it's a very fun process.

Let's just say that. That was you. Yeah. Okay. If someone made it, Karen, Alicia wants to know, if someone made a movie about your lives for some reason, who would you want to play you? Well, of course, Francis McDormand. Oh, you don't look like her. I don't care. Okay. I mean, does it have to be matchy, matchy? I guess not. It could be whoever the fuck you want. I mean, I don't, I want both Olsen twins to play me. I wouldn't be so complicated that it takes, and Gemini, that it takes twins to fucking play me. You know what? That's cool, actually. Right? And very like Charlie Kaufman, artistic. Yeah. And cinematic. Like we couldn't get one actress to encapsulate all her depth and fucking interesting shit. No way. And the like,

the, just the reverberations of her belches. So we had to have two actresses belch at the same time. Yeah. Yeah, that's good. Okay. How about you? Charlie Kaufman? You want Charlie Kaufman to play you? I think Charlie Brown. That was my niece's. She used to call like, you know, Mary Christmas, Charlie Brown or whatever this Charlie Brown, peanut specials. My sister used to play them for us, for her, for us. I was there too. But all the time. And so she'd look, she'd like two years old and she'd look and be like, Charlie Bowden. It's like the only thing she could say, but it was her way of saying like, do you want to watch it again? And then the first baby doll my sister ever bought her that one of those dolls that looked like a real baby.

She pulled it out of the box and she's staring at, holding it and smiling. And my sister goes, what are you going to name her? She goes, Charlie Brown, because it's a little bald, round headed baby. And we were like, you're the smartest child on the planet. She's so smart the way she can put these things together. The way she calls every single thing she sees, Charlie Brown. What's the scariest bug, Georgia? This is from Becca. The scariest bug is a anything that's not supposed to fly that flies. Ew. Like a flying spider. Why is it flying? It's a spider. You know what I mean? Or like a fucking flying roach. It's supposed to be a fucking cockroach. Why is it flying? I came home last night, real time last night to us, our real time. And in the TV room, Frank was

not paying attention to the food that I had. He was like wagging his tail, which he almost never does, and doing something in the corner. And I was like, there's a bug over there. Yeah. And it turned out to be one of these cockroaches that's like the big black, like big fucking little capitol. Yes. But they're brown. Brown. But with wings. But like shells. They're like water bugs almost. And Frank had half eaten. And it was not good. Wagging his fucking tail for. Because he thinks it's fun. It's like a little monster that he's caught. Oh my god. Well, I still have that box of moths on the fucking that I haven't moved on the fucking balcony from the cats. Are you just going to brick over that balcony and never go out there again? That's a good, I mean, look, listen.

Oh, give me the other page. Where's the other page? Stephen has it. Would either of you, John wants to know, would either of you go in a hot air balloon? No. No. You know what's weird? I want to go to a hot air balloon festival, get up at dawn and watch them all take off. Like in those slide shows that my father sends me through email constantly, those forwarded emails. Do they have like a uplifting quotes in cursive on them? You can do it. Yeah. But I would love to see that in real life. Like see, watch them get blown up and take off. Can they be like, can I get like, can there be like an apple cider festival going on too? Because I want snacks. If I'm like about early and go look at a thing that I'm not part of.

Okay. I want snacks. Great. So we'll do that. This will be like a September thing that we'll do. Yeah. So it'll be kind of like autumnal. Autumnal. What if we do it at the Circleville Pumpkin Show. Oh my God. Circleville Pumpkin Show. What was the question? This is not a hot air balloon. Here's my answer. No, because Margaret Cho was in a hot air balloon crash. Shut up. And the last time I did a show, she was on it and she told the story and I could not stop laughing. She like, like people got seriously hurt because a wind kicked up and her hot air balloon crashed. Okay. I just don't, none of this, don't do this. Don't do it. Don't go up there. Don't go up there. But for a little while, and this is very fascinating, for a little while people thought like in the

whatever 1700s or I don't know, probably 1600s, people thought hot air balloons. Actually it's the 1500s. Maybe it was the 1500s. People thought hot air balloons were the way everyone was going to travel. You ever seen those like postcards, the illustrations of like, right, people thought that that was going to be like the new superhighway or whatever. Idiots. Fucking fools. Stupid heads. We did that one. Hi Elvis. Okay. Sue asks us this. She says stupid icebreaker type question, but if you'd only bring five things with you to a desert island, five things, what would they be? I'm going to count them off while you say what they are. Elvis. Yes. Vince. Do you like that Vince a second? Don't tell him. Mimi. Dottie. One thing left. Shit.

A fucking hammock. And then you all get into that hammock together and die as a family and starve today. I would have to bring the very first thing is tweezers. Fucking. Is it because the sun's going to look like be great and you can, you're going to actually see those hairs? Yeah. That and I will fully look like Tom Hanks and Castaway if I don't bring tweezers. Okay. In six months they'll come and rescue me and be like, this man has a goatee. Did you eat Karen? We don't need her. So I would say tweezers. A mirror. It'll need a mirror. Oh yeah. That's right. A mirror. A mirror. My air buds if they were connected something. And you might as well bring alcohol

if you're going to eat on a fucking deserted island. Thank you. How about a crate of rum? Then I just started staying at Pirates of the Caribbean movie plotline. I bury the rum. No one knows it's there. I'm drunk. Eyeliner, black eyeliner and big boots like Jack Sparrow. Yeah. Perfect. Perfect. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. I'm going to read the longest one. I don't know what it says. Ashley says, has reading slash covering a specific story made you change your behavior? For example, I compulsively locked my car after I get out thanks to a campus alert I received while in college about a man climbing into unlocked cars and waiting until people had driven off campus to sit up and car jack them. Yeah. That's a horrifying story. Yeah. I think that

I was already paranoid to begin with, but I guess I just gotten paranoid. Yeah. You know. Well, you know the thing like we were talking about this the other night, but I think I'm just suspicious of people who seem like they've got like there's nothing going on. Like those people who are like in a good mood all the time, like positive and upbeat or whatever. I'm just like, you're not fucking fooling me. Oh, so yeah, you think people are hiding a shit more now? The more even keel and like well adjusted you seem to be to me, because I don't believe people are really like that. So you must think I'm crazy. No, I think, no, I think you're the safest person there could be on this planet. Thank you. The veneer, like what's this big veneer for?

Like the people, the people that are like, well, I do my crossfit every morning and then I fucking do this and I do that. And there's no outer show that you are hurt, broken, affected or whatever, where it's like, Oh, are you a sociopath? So people who won't show any vulnerability. Yeah. People who just they've like the outer presentation is perfection. I'm just, I don't buy it. Yeah, I like that. Okay, you go. Wait, did you answer? No, I agree. Okay, how about this one? Rachel asks, if you could have been a fly on the wall in a police station for any past murder investigation, which investigation would you choose and why? That's good. Well, of course, I want to say East area rape is right up the bat. I think more so

than the investigation, I want to be a fly on the wall for an interrogation. Yeah, like to me, that sounds so fun. And like when I watch them, I watch them on, you know, true crime shows, I am obsessed with that part and I want to watch the whole fucking thing. Yeah. So I bet it was so fun to fucking interrogate Golden State killer. Yeah, I mean, I would absolutely. I know that's very like of the moment, but it really is just I want to know everything that's going on and it drives me crazy that we don't get a direct line of like, well, this happened yesterday. Yeah. I think I would also love actually, Burke Ramsey's childhood child psychologist interrogation. Nice one. That's like there's a little bit of footage we can watch, but the I want to fucking listen in

on the on all of it. And I also want to be seated seated next to a child psychologist who couldn't tell me what's going on and why. Yeah, like he's saying this because of this, that is a bad sign right there, like all that craning. Yeah, crazy shit. Yeah, yeah. Where there's things that are indicators that you wouldn't necessarily know unless you're a real expert. I think that's also why I really, really did love Mindhunter so much. Because any other thing that you could pick apart or have a complaint with because that's all anyone does anymore is pick these part. But I found it so satisfying that there was that moment where he was sitting there just having a chat with Ed Kemper. And there was nothing in you that didn't totally believe that was Ed Kemper.

That and that's really what it is where I'm not, I don't like the celebrity of serial killers or whatever, but I am fascinated with what happens when a brain goes and when someone just is following their own crazy logic. Yeah. To that degree. Yeah. But they can actually tell you about it. Right. But that's exactly the way I'd want to do it where it's not really the real person. Yeah. And it's, yeah. You know that our, our Ed Kemper, our actor friend. Our boy Ed Kemper. Ed Kemper, he's in Barry. Yes. TV show, which is so exciting. He's in it and the yellow king from the first season of The True Detective. Right. That guy's an incredible actor. So good. That show, the fucking, the guy who plays the bald headed, the shaved headed gangster. Oh my

God. I love him so much. He's such a fascinating faced person. Yeah. But that yellow king man, when he shows up anywhere, because he was that, he's been all these things where every time he shows up, you're like, hold on. I know that face. I didn't know Vince knew. He had to show me a photo from that show to be like, remember, I, I didn't remember. That's the thing where it was like, I wish people would save their sick saying people are genius actors or whatever for shit like that words. Like have they ever made you truly believe they were an entirely different person? Because that's good acting. So good. Should we do one more? Sure. Keep going. Yeah. I think we can wrap this down. Yeah. If you could be on a jury, Sheila says open back stairs are the most terrifying

things ever. Right. Open back stairs. Yeah. Like I think like my stairs right here, where like someone can grab your ankle. Oh, on the ground. I was like, aren't they all open back? You mean like a slide that's covered? How would it not be open back? Oh, so like almost like 70s modern stairs. Yeah. Yeah, I got sure. How about I'm not rich to know in which era of US history do you think it would be easiest to get away with a murder? I mean Wild West, right? Yeah. Or anytime. I'm always shocked at any time that they solve a murder like before the 1930s. Yeah. I mean, it was amazing how it was just like the murder. This the crime scene would get discovered and immediately 17 reporters would

be standing in the blood and they would be chain smoking in it. Yeah. And like spitting gum and too. I mean, it's so crazy. I wonder what your answer would be to this because I this might not be a good area. But in case you do have an answer, Julie asks, what are your favorite fictional crime shows? Oh, fictional. I did like Cold Case. Cold Case the one with the blonde girl. Yeah. With all the hair. Yeah. I don't watch that many of those or just not my thing. But of course, Law and Order is just like fucking epic and amazing. So good. What's yours? I like Killing Eve is out right now and I like that a lot. Oh, yeah, I heard that's good. It's really Sandra Oh such a fucking badass. Someone said, I think it's Emily Nassbaum who is a

reporter for I think the New York Times. But I follow her on Twitter and she was like, she was raving about that show. She was like, I love it. It's making me so happy. Yeah, it's good. Yeah. I mean, I definitely grew up and like Law and Order kept me alive when I used to have to do the road because I would go and have these I mean, horrific nights of just terrible eating it in like one nighters and terrible bars and just bad shit where I was like, I didn't want to be there. They didn't want me there. Everything about it was like not fun, which I lost the point entirely of like, this is what you're supposed to be just having fun with people, right? But it was awful. And then I would go back to my hotel room and just lock

the door, turn the lights off, turn the TV on, get room service and watch Law and Order. And it was like taking a hot bath. It was my hot bath. Yeah. And I it began to then it I realized it was on all the time and everywhere. And I could have that hot bath feeling whenever I wanted. Yeah. And Sam Waterston is the OG like something about that guy. Yeah. I like I love the the subtle storyline that he's kind of always fucking the female DA that works with them. There's there's always some weird like they're not overt, but like one time they'll say one thing about how he's having an affair with this person, except not Angie Harmon. She was way too hot for Sam Waterston. Of course.

I love it. That's that's good. Do you think we've done it? I think we did it. Was that long enough? It was about an hour. Well, sorry. That's about an hour. All right. It was long enough that Steven's voice shut down. Steven lost his voice. Should we ask Steven a couple questions? Yes. Here, let me find one. Steven, pen or pencil? Let me ask you who that's from. Tell you. Brianna wants to know, do you prefer using pen or pencil? Pen. Okay. And then good one, Brianna. Okay, wait. I write weird and so I smudge and so if you have pencil. What about Steven? What? Steven? Steven, Kate wants to know what your death row meal, your death sentence meal would be. Oh, that's a good one. Let's all say ours. Okay.

Because I feel like it's guilty pleasure, right? You need to go out on a high note. I feel like it's your last anything you get to eat on this planet. Comfort food, like anything that makes you happy. I think I already said mine is cheese plate, corn dogs, devil's egg. You're sticking with your Cleveland meal? Sticking with it and champagne. Craft macaroni and cheese. Yes. With hot dogs. Yes. Pepper on top and ketchup. Nice. That sounds disgusting. Just that one. Yeah, just that. Just like a big bowl. Almost like a mac and cheese hot dog casserole. Yeah, like the whole box of craft, like not just half of it. Yeah, not a scoop. I'm just having the whole thing. And you put pepper, like ground pepper on top of it. Yeah, over the, so it's got a nice little.

That sounds disgusting and I want it immediately. And what kind of hot sauce? Oh, no, just straight up ketchup. Just straight up Heinz ketchup. Like mixed in it. With macaroni and cheese. Steven, were you abandoned in the children's cafeteria when you were eight years old? You want a high C with that? It just reminds me of like, it just reminds me of when my mom was like, I don't want to cook. I've been working nine to five and I have to pick you up from daycare. And like, I'm just going to throw that craft in the thing. You heat it for like five minutes. Yeah. It's delicious. Mix it with the cheese. And kids fucking love it. Hot dogs. Like they never go, I don't know how do we eat this. It's just like they eat it all. Hot dogs for protein-ish.

Yeah. Extra sodium. Hot dogs for nitrates. Then if we're doing, if we're doing childhood loves, then I want, I want to change mine to cornmeal pancakes for dinner. Oh, and who did that? Janet or Marty? Janet. Pancakes for dinner. We're like, didn't know we were poor. It's like the most exciting thing. Yeah, that's fun times. Yeah. What's yours, Karen? Well, if we're going to do childhood, then it's overcooked chicken breast. Oh, because my mother always was like, oh, oh, pull that chicken out of the oven, which like always forgot it was in there. So overcooked chicken breast, minute rice, and a frozen corn that's been defrosted. Yeah, that's good. And then just like Stephen's saying, I think the seasoning is kind of key because that's when all the food my mom

made was so bland that you'd be like, no, you know what, I will try some pepper. Like, I know I'm only 10, but let's get started. Salt and pepper, but loury seasoning salt is actually great. Look at onion salt we could use. Okay, what about Stofors french bread pizzas? And then can we go there? My parents wouldn't buy shit like that. Well, I eat it as an adult, though. Oh, then yes, we can go there. Okay. I feel like Vince made us one of those one time after we were recording for a long time. No, that was like a tombstone, something or other. It was good though. It was fucking good. Like coming downstairs. And I think this is the other thing because we this got pulled out of the equation kind of early where my mom would be like, we'll make it yourself. She was the

queen of making yourself. So anytime someone's like, I whipped up this thing for you. I like, I just the concept of it makes me like, oh, this is the best thing ever. So even when you're dating someone, they're like, let me make you dinner. Never fucking happened. I can't remember one person that cooked that I know. Are you serious? I just gave Steven a look of like, Steven, we need to help her. I just in this Q&A show alone realized that I have a bad picker. I just can't pick them at all. All right. Well, Steven and I are going to pick someone for you. It's just because I always date bodybuilders. Oh, stop it. You're complaining about people who don't want dessert and then you're dating a bodybuilder. I'm not. I'm joking. Okay. Like I'm trying to figure out why the fuck. Oh,

I get it. What am I? Because even he would boil a fucking chicken breast for you. I mean, one would hope some rice pilaf and a bunch of broccoli rice pilaf and broccoli and what about that rice pilaf that has the weird almonds in it? We're like, are these almonds manmade? Dude, I love that shit. They're good. I'm hungry. Should we get food? Yeah. All right. Let's do it. Thanks for listening to this fucking weird Q&A. We'll be back home in the US of A next week. We'll be back on brand when our big tour is over. That's right. So thanks for listening. Stay sexy. And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Hey Elvis, you want a cookie? He's like, you guys have been making me hungry this whole fucking time.