My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark - MFM Minisode 214

Episode Date: February 15, 2021

This week’s hometowns include a creepy neighbor story and a bomb scare.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We at Wondery live, breathe and downright obsess over true crime and now we're launching the ultimate true crime fan experience, Exhibit C. Join now by following Wondery, Exhibit C on Facebook and listen to true crime on Wondery and Amazon Music. Exhibit C. It's truly criminal. Hello and welcome to my favorite murder. The Minions to the Minions. We're going to talk about Minions only. This is your central space for many Minion conversations. We need to make some money and so Minions offered us fucking $10 and to do an episode strictly about Minions and we said yes. We said we'll do those weird little voices. We'll put on those overalls. We'll have one eye. And we're not even being taped. We're doing it anyways. I've watched those movies with Nora.

They're so cute. So many times. They're genuinely hilarious movies. They're genuinely great. I was shocked. I was so bored and I was probably high and I put the first one on and I was like, oh, I was going to make fun of this and it's darling. Wait, what is the actual movie called? Despicable Me. Despicable Thank You Stephen. Despicable Me and there's our $10. We've earned it. Yeah, we did it. But part one, two and I'm assuming three because one and two I can stand by and say, that is, turn that on. You'll enjoy yourself. Absolutely. I agree. Cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching. Oh my God. Feel the dollar, dollar bills pile up. Hey, happy Valentine's Day. Oh my God, it's Valentine's Day. Happy Valentine's Day.

Happy Valentine's Day. That's so nice. I forgot. Do you know what I did? Huh? Here's my confession for Valentine's Day. Nora was having a fundraiser, a Seize Candy fundraiser. Okay, these are the words I want in my life more. Okay, good. Because you're about to have them in your life. I bought 12 boxes of Seize Candy heart-shaped boxes, Valentine's boxes, for everybody at exactly right and then just left them in the box on the counter, completely forgot about them and then I was like, what am I supposed to fucking drive all over the place? I should have sent them in the mail. That was going to be my idea is like, you know, happy Valentine's Day, love George and Karen. Oh, I was going to say, hey, since I'm the other half of exactly right, can I get a name on there?

Of course, of course. Thank you. You're going to be in there. There's a chance though that I've opened a couple and eaten only the, because it is like a, it's not nuts and chews, it's the mix. Yes. So I don't like, I would say three quarters of what's in there. Vince and I definitely, there's a, there's a rift in this household of nuts and chews or assorted and I'm a definitely assorted. He's a nuts and chews. Guys, if you don't want to say assorted, I knew you were going to say it. Because I love the, okay, I know this isn't many, so we're not supposed to be talking about shit, but guys, if you don't like it, hold on a second. Yes, we are. This is our, well, who are the people? Who are the people that listen to podcasts and then go on

social media to say, I don't like when they talk on the podcast. They didn't do it my way. Go away and start your own podcast where you say hello and you immediately start reading out of murder pedia. Go do that. Yeah. Please. Wishing you well. Goodbye. Good luck. Get laid. Good luck. Here. So if you don't know, if you live in the Midwest or something and have never been to LA or through the airport in California, C's candy is our, is the best fucking chocolates I've ever had in my entire life. The best. They're never not on our Hanukkah dessert table. It's just like the fucking thing. It's the thing. It's a perfect gift. If you don't know what to get people at Christmas, you get the two pound box of either assorted or nuts and chews depending on your

personality. Fucking monster or not. And then if you don't know what to bring to a party, you don't want to bring a bottle of wine or whatever. Everyone loses their shit over a box of C's candy. It's genuinely great. And their carmels, that's mostly what I'm in it for, because their carmels are so insanely perfect. Another 10 bucks. There we go. You're welcome. Mary, Mary C, who is a feminist icon. That's right. Good old Mary C on the front of every box. That's right. I'm going to come out of COVID with Mary C's haircut. She has like the total 30s finger wave, but it's great. It's all right. And she has her circular glasses and a beautiful shawl. Yep. Has anyone ever gone as Mary C for Halloween? If you have,

may we please Mary C you? Oh, my good one. That would be the best idea. Yeah, you just carry around a box and you give people chocolates because when you go in their stores in the mall, you get you immediately get a free sample of a chocolate. That's right. So the reason if you have C's candy at your local mall, and if you do, explaining this to you is stupid, but if you do, the reason the line is long, oftentimes it's not because people are having to get those one and two pound boxes of candy. It's because they're up there like, I'll take some of them molasses chips because it's for free. Right. Or if you go like, when you were in like high school, it'd be like, I want a free chocolate. I can't afford chocolates. So you go in there and

buy one of their suckers or lollipops, which are delicious for like a buck. Then you also get a free chocolate. Yeah. And then I'll, oh, I love it. I love that place. It's old fashioned hometown. That's right. It's good time. That's right. But who I, well, on a later podcast, we'll discuss. I wonder where C's is and isn't. If it's like a West Coast thing, if it's Pacific Northwest and I've only seen it in California, but I actually, I, here's how I know that it's further than that because I one year bought a, bought a two pound box of C's candy to my boyfriend at the time's mother, um, who lived in Oregon thinking it was this amazing gift of like, let me bring local candy at my people. Yes. And I got off the plane and there's a C's thing,

like a C's Piosk right outside my gate. So I was like, hmm, well, here's the thing that you can get too. It was like, I brought her a big box of M&Ms. There you go. Enjoy the rare candy. Oh, and that's why it didn't work out. I feel like. And that's why we had to let that relationship go. That's right. End it. Meeting parents. That's another conversation for another time. It is. The worst. That's the worst. Do you want to go first this week? Sure. Why not? Let's change it up. It's Valentine's Day. It's Gallantime's Day. It's Gallantime's Day. This is called science teacher, just a good old gal. Hello, podcasters and podcast listeners. Good one. Hello. This is a story about my high school AP biology teacher. We will call her Dr.

Benson. For one, everyone in my school called her Dr. Lucy in a condescending way. That was her first name. And we'd always say, you know, Lucy as in Lucy fur. Oh, yeah. This starts out bad and gets better. She was a tough old girl weighing in at no more than 110 soaking wet and standing at a ferocious five feet even. She could scare literally any six foot tall high school boy with one glance. Might I mention this woman is almost 80 years old and still hasn't stopped teaching. Yes. Anyway, Dr. Benson had a reputation for going off on tangents about her own life. In fact, the five students of our AP biology class, all girls go girls, she said, were many times able to get her to go down rabbit trails to avoid taking quizzes. Yes. Yes. Dr. Lewis, Dr. Benson, please

tell us about your lives because we didn't study. Dr. Benson, did you have sasparilli when you were growing up? Tell us all about it. Tell us about hanging out with Mrs. C's candy. What was that like? What was Mary C like as a rebellious teen? She told us all about her first love, who was a man in the Navy who ended up with her best friend. Ouch. Both of them later ended up dying on the bed together of the notebook style. Oh, that was true love. Yeah. She told us how she got her doctorate in animal science, wrestling cows and pigs. Yes. A five foot tall woman wrangling cattle is still the funniest thing I've ever imagined. So many stories, but there was one I want to share in this email. When she was 17 years old, she was a clerk for a gas station in her

hometown. One time she was alone counting out the money and about to close up shop, just then a large burly man with a ski mask and a gun walked in. The first thing Dr. Benson said to him was, Hey, we don't actually have cameras and I have a terrible memory. So you can just skip the whole I'm a scary masked man bit. This took him back with so much fuck you energy that he actually took off the mask and demanded the money. It distracted him just enough for Dr. Benson to have enough time to grab and this is all caps her personal shotgun that she kept in the store to point at him. Oh, yes. This small 17 year old brought her dad's shotgun with her to every shift for this exact moment. Hell yeah. The guy ended up just running out and Dr. Benson closed up shop

as usual. Also, the gas station did have one camera. So it did capture his face and the guy got arrested for attempted robbery. She said she didn't know what happened after that to the guy, but I can imagine he felt a little emasculated having been beaten out by a five foot tall 17 year old girl. Stay sexy and don't ever try to fight small people. Olive. And then it says PS. If you want this story at the time she stopped someone who was assaulting her husband, just let me know. I have got far too many stories about this amazing woman, right? Her fucking biography immediately. But in the meantime, all of send that story in put your name olive in the subject line because we'll pull that immediately. Because unless you're a ghost, how are you a person from

today who's named olive? Unbelievable. Lauren and Kurt Brahmiller from our podcast network and Lauren our friend, their daughter's name is olive, which is just coming back. It's the best. Come on back olive. I was a little mad that I couldn't name my cat that because I have a friend whose daughter's name is olive. That would just be brood, right? I hope you really got in their face about it. Fuck. And then their other kid, their son's name is Gus, which is the other best cat's name in the world. You're like, why are you doing that? Maybe I shouldn't be friends with them anymore. Yeah. Maybe you should break up with them as a couple. Isn't Gus the hot tub cat's name? Yes. Gus. But that was, he was before them. So it's okay. Oh, okay. All right. Okay. Here's my

first one. Hi friends. This is a creepy neighbor story. I don't remember if you asked for that, but let's assume you did. I'm sure we did. When I lived in Salt Lake City, my husband and I lived in a row home that was only four houses long. I don't know what that is. You know what I'm guessing? It's a house that's stuck to three other houses. Or like in New York, how they have the railroad homes. I bet it's like that. Or they're just like straight, narrow, but then the rooms break off. Hold on a second. Oh, look at Stephen showing us rooms. Got it. Thank you, Stephen. So they're houses that are just right next to each other. Smashed together. Yeah. Got it. All right. So our next door neighbor was a 50-ish year old guy named Earl. He was single, worked at the gas station

next to our house, so was always outside his house smoking and hanging with people he met at the station. What? I was walking, right? I was walking to my car one day, not long after I moved in, and he stopped me and asked if I wanted to come inside to see his quote, extensive butcher knife collector. What the fuck? And went on to say he loved to sneak up on people and come at them slasher style as a joke. I politely said, no, thank you, and to never ever do that to me. Oh, there are all red flags in this. Neighbor boundaries. Oh my god. Okay. Fast forward to three years later, still living at the same place. I was coming home on the bus from work like I do every day. It was a local bus route with the same people, and I thought it was

odd that a guy I didn't recognize got on and off at the exact same stops I did. I decided to take a weird route home to see if he was in fact following me or if I was paranoid. I made a ton of random turns that looped back on itself, and he still followed me about 20 steps behind me. I went to call my husband and realized my phone was dead. And then in parentheses, a common occurrence for me. Me too. My husband worked later in the evening, and I realized I was being followed while walking in my house where I would be alone with a dead phone. So my panic brain drove me in a direction that I didn't expect, straight to my creepy neighbor Earl's front door. He opened the door and I told him some dude was

following me. And without skipping a beat, he said, I'm on it and came out of the house with, you guessed it, a butcher knife in one hand and a taser in the other. The guy following was loitering behind a tree in front of my driveway and ditched quick after seeing Earl in all his knifed up glory. But Earl sat in front of my door with his knife and taser, despite my protests, until my husband came home two hours later. I fucking cry. It's the cutest. Oh, George is full on crying. You love the twist of Earl, huh? Well, first of all, I feel guilty that I was like, he's the problem, you know what I mean? And now I'm like, when you need someone in a moment, like I'll never, can I just say the story real quick? Yes. And I was like 21. I had my first car

and I fucking, of course, died in the middle of a busy intersection. And I don't know how to do car things from 21. And I'm just standing out there crying. If people are honking at me, the only person who got out of their car to help me was this enormous, fully tatted up, scary dude. And he saw me crying. He pushed my car out of the way. He gave me his card because he was a tattoo artist, it turned out. And I was just like, he was the only person who stopped to help me. So that's giving me those vibes. And I find that very lovely. I mean, that is a beautiful story. And I think here's the thing, Earl was giving off red flag vibes. You weren't wrong to say it because we all need to go over time. And again, where it's like, yeah, sometimes when

people collect weapons, that means ultimately they would like to hurt people. But what we're learning from this story is it doesn't mean that they want to hurt the wrong people. Right. It's like Earl was a secret hero waiting for his moment and is with his butcher knives to shine. However, I feel like her instinct not to go inside his house was the right one too. Yes. But also that's just good neighbor politics. You don't want to be up in your neighbor's house. Yes. You don't want to. Good fences make good neighbors. You just keep your distance. Stay likable by staying far away. Amazing. That's that's what makes it all work. Okay. So sorry. Got a husband came home two hours later. Anyway, I don't know if the moral of the story

is trust your creepy neighbors or charge your fucking phones or who the fuck knows. Stay sexy and start collecting butcher knives, Aaron. Wonderful instincts. Beautiful instincts. I think that was it's nice to have it's like a silver lining story happen every month. It's also our our friend Neil Mahoney who was one of the most wonderful people anyone has ever met him has met collected switch blades and switch blades and knives and he just passed away like a month ago. Yeah. And everyone's devastated and it made me think of him too. And like he he had creep he could have creepy neighbor vibes if you didn't know him except he was kind of hot but he was hot and he had shy guy vibes which actually only adds to it doesn't take away from

in my opinion it adds to absolutely he listened to this podcast and as we got popular with it he sent me one of the loveliest notes about how watching this happened to us was like watching two girls like win the lottery and buy all the roller skates and gumballs they wanted it was like the cutest loveliest and he worked on mr show so he knew you from the beginning I've known him for a long time he was my secret crush for a long time yeah it's very fucking sad the idea that we lost Neil Mahoney of all people is is a goddamn tragedy it's it's just wrong it is so that kind of made me like yeah tear up from that um this one's called if let's bring it back up this one's called my dad tased Phil specter I had to read that

because it's a spoiler but it's also the best okay yes hi Georgia Karen Steven and all furry friends it's inclusive I like that I've been wanting to write in chief for the longest time about my quote connection with Phil specter my dad was a police officer in southern California for almost 25 years and was one of the officers who responded to the 911 call after he shot and killed Lana Clarkson specter was resisting arrest which I didn't know and my dad was the one who tased him wow I was eight at the time and it was extremely fascinated that my dad tased a celebrity and I told everyone I could until I was told to stop telling people hashtag oops an eight-year-old being like hey my dad tastes okay I remember watching the trial on tv as a kid and how they

had to blur out my dad's name and face for privacy he was actually asked to stand up so people could see his height and weight and it was questioned why he even had a tased specter maybe because he had just killed someone question right question my mom actually attended the trial one day and said specter turned around and stared at her and she got instant chills when I told my dad about your podcast and how I wanted to write in with the story and suggested to cover spills Phil specter he replied with why that piece of shit doesn't deserve any more publicity mm-hmm needless to say when specter died a few weeks ago my dad's response was fucking finally thanks for all the stories that keep me entertained when I drive from Arizona to California to visit my family

I've turned my boyfriend into a murder Reno and we've bonded over our interest in two crime I'm really glad my knowledge of serial killers hasn't scared him away yet ssdgm Kelsey Kelsey nice job okay here's uh well I'm not going to read you the subject line of this one right uh because it is a it's a giveaway or hey Karen Georgia Stephen and all the amazing fur babies so just immediately trying to start a fight with me right at the beginning I went to an engineering university where our primary focused study is aerospace engineering oh among all of the smart technical people here I was an art major oh I always felt like an outcast but some of the headlines my university makes made me feel more normal than I ever felt from a chemistry professor

throwing a class made bomb into our pond to a professor shooting at a group of her colleagues because she didn't get tenure oh that's the one I did yeah yeah I'm gonna pretend like I knew this but Stephen actually just read it to us University of Alabama at Huntsville is where I'm guessing this person went to call yeah right right because I did the story of um Amy Bishop who shot a bunch of people point blank in a meeting horrible a horrifying okay my university keeps me shaking my head what takes the cake though is when mysterious silver boxes chained down to benches started randomly appearing around campus no one reported it however someone eventually did report the mysterious boxes and suddenly the bomb squad descended upon our campus carefully they

blow up one of the boxes only to find a plane oh what kittens what no okay good a playing card inside what as these policemen stood there in confusion a larping group oh live action role playing came to tell police that these mysterious silver boxes were part of a game they were all playing for their quote unquote quest guys the police were not amused and instructed them to go around campus and remove the boxes from all their locations so long story short larping isn't unusual at my university but our police department draws the line at larping games that involve mysterious silver boxes fair enough right that also that are chained yeah think think it through it couldn't be like unless you had put crime scene tape around them it couldn't have been more ominous

yes that's no one wants that shit that's ridiculous a locked box in a public place yeah it's like if you see something say something remember that quote and don't be the person who puts a thing there that someone has to see it and say that the seeing part yeah exactly don't make people say things about the thing they can see thank you so much for being an awesome podcast to listen to you always seem to brighten my day while keeping me aware of horrible people much love sabrina sabrina who fucking knew i feel like you should be loud and proud about your art student status because yeah that could be so much worse as everyone at your school has shown or something looking for a better cooking routine with meal planning shopping and prepping handled hello

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you need so get up to 20 free meals with purchase plus free shipping on your first box at hello fresh dot ca slash murder 20 with code murder 20 that's up to 20 free meals plus free shipping on your first box when you go to hello fresh dot ca slash murder 20 and use code murder 20 goodbye hey i'm arisha and i'm brook and we're the hosts of wondery's podcast even the rich where we bring you absolutely true and absolutely shocking stories about the most famous families and biggest celebrities the world has ever seen our newest series is all about the incomparable diva whitney houston whitney's voice defined a generation and even after her death her talent remains unmatched but her incredible success hit a deeply private pain in our series whitney houston

destiny of a diva will tell you how she hid her true self to make everyone around her happy and how the pressure to be all things to all people let her down a dark path follow even the rich wherever you get your podcasts you can listen ad-free on the amazon music or wondery app my last one is just hometown story oh and and maybe i picked it because of the opening maybe not hi to all but especially cookie hello when i heard your call for stories about hippie parents who went on to do good in the world i knew it was my chance to write in i don't remember that do you care yes i do okay great it's the woman who remember the mom worked for missing and murdered indigenous women oh yeah yeah okay my parents lori and mel met in the 1970s when they were both

attending a non-traditional program at the university of montana one december night they were hanging out at the train yard with their mutual friend joel as one apparently does in small town montana they decided to take a look inside one of the freight trains one thing led to another and the train took off oh joel bailed after a day or two but my parents spent the next month riding the rails like old timey hobos and ended up falling in love oh i know yep when they finally made it back to montana they moved into a teepee with about 20 friends and then it says in parentheses it was the 70s and i'm sure my very white parents were less aware of cultural appropriation than they would be now so they started planning for their future and while my mom had planned to

become a nutritionist my dad doctor into going to medical school she eventually became a pediatrician and went on to start a program where she provided medical care to all of the foster kids in denver colorado oh she never told me much about the kids she'd work with and i won't share any other stories because they're not mine to tell but i will say that it's inspiring that after 30 years of seeing some really fucked up shit she still believes in the inherent goodness of people she fucking provided medical care to all the foster kids in denver that's like that's saintly my mom is also known for her understated dry sense of humor she's given me great advice like quote if a man who has been divorced twice tries to get you to move on to a boat with him just say no which i like very specific

and quote sometimes things seem bad but you just get used to them and then they get worse she gave me that second bit of advice in january 2020 so she was a visionary visionary and a fucking predictor of the future yeah stay sexy and be careful who you hang out with in the train yard because you might fall in love uh love hannah and hannah's pronouns are she her a lovely romantic story it reminds me of like in college when you all go to a denny's after like an event and you end up sitting at that denny's for like four hours laughing your ass off and talking but then you realize after a while we this used to be my one of my favorite things to talk about is after a while you start to understand that energy that everyone is i mean and this is very

theater student uh typical thing i'm talking about but you realize after a while the energy is actually coming from two people that have a crush on each other that they're the reason that everyone's there those two people want to be around each other but are nervous and so everyone else that they're hanging out and having fun but there is there are basically two there's an energy between two people that is like everyone else's feeding and they're like it's the only way they can break down their boundaries enough to be the funny yeah like you're you want to be around your friends when you with the person you have a crush on because that way you can be yourself and they see what you're really like because you're so fucking nervous and yeah there's the pressure yes exactly like the pressure

is lessened and so it's like the three of them were hanging out in the train yard you know casual no big deal then they're like oh it'd be funny if we got all got on this thing but her parents were basically like i'll get on this train and stay on it forever with you and two to three days joe was like um this isn't going to happen for me this is stupid and now we're like four counties away from how am i going to get back home that's right he's like i'm not going to be making out with either of you so i am out of here so peace and then just jump i could just picture him just jumping and rolling you did me from um from a big adventure where he's like jimmy cracked corn where the guy finally is like i can't sing jimmy cracked corn anymore get me out of here oh train life all right are you

ready for the last one always i'm not going to read you the subject line although it's funny hi karen georgia and steven hi hi i'm writing in because you all requested embarrassing stories and although my life is full of them this one from my high school career ascends to a level beyond bring it lucky for you i've resorted to thinking about high school it's i've resorted to thinking about high school as some distant fictional comedic farce which makes it palatable to repeat a stranger everyone try that everyone try it's a it's a not yet written chapter in your memoirs so just start practicing telling it there's to be able to begin to transition out of bitterness rage and pain from high school and take this person's um plan of thinking about it as some

distant fictional comedic farce is like a life plan it is and everyone know who's in their 20s right now you're going to also do that with your 20s so don't worry about it yeah as a person in their 50s let me just tell you this whole thing this is the way you do all of life all of it just like kelsie's mom said it just keeps getting worse so you have to like be developing this constant idea of like it's not a hilarious one i went into foreclosure i always feel like that girl did this like i refer to myself at at 35 is that girl was fucking crazy that girl oh my god i'd never hang out with her that georgia it was me it was not yeah okay i'm from a town outside national tennessee called brentwood for a majority of my high school career i was going through a very angsty misunderstood

phase aside from the fact that i played on the rugby team i kept my internal aggression to myself except for one except for by accident one fateful friday afternoon our high school was our high school was hyped up for the football game that night so naturally after the last bell rang the teens flooded into the hallways with increased amounts of shoving and crowding i was navigating the chaos as usual my hands full of books and my mind full of numbness and apathy that's right that's how you do it it was at this moment that the urge to yawn overcame me with my hands full i couldn't cover my mouth which i thought was fine spoiler it was not fine immediately after the yawn began one of the football players who was probably about six

foot five rounded the corner with his arms outstretched like an eagle over the crowded hallway i saw it coming and tried to end the yawn prematurely but it was too late which also you can't end the yawn prematurely you'll never look chill trying to end the yawn also the muscles are set in such a way where you have to finish the yawn you can't just like snap it back closed you'll die you'll die you'll die but it was too late by the time his arm reached my face it fit into my mouth perfectly almost like a puzzle piece i didn't have i didn't have time to feel anything other than disgust and horror as i reflexively bit down on his arm this is his fault so far i just want to go on record i mean it's very football playerated

just like fly like an eagle first of all it must be fun to be six foot five absolutely up above all the other teams you don't have to look straight into anyone's acne ridden sad apathetic face you're up there flying like an eagle it's been a big night the game the game's coming as i quickly unlatch the crowd carried the two of us in opposite directions not giving any time to acknowledge what just happened and looking back i'm incredibly thankful for the surge of sports testosterone that filled the hallways in that moment otherwise i might have made eye contact with the guy and died of embarrassment anyway thank you for all the last no there's not more i want more they got away with it basically big yawn then like arm

appetizer and then just never the twain shall meet they're two ships passing in the night it could have been love but instead it was just like tasted your arm and then walked away this guy we're gonna call him chad if chad is a murderino and he's hearing this you need to write your side of the story in immediately of what you thought did you go to high school in brent wood tenancy were you a six foot five football player do you remember that fateful friday afternoon of the big game could you not play because your aunt you had a fucking wound what if you changed his entire trajectory in life because he was going on to university be like the fucking star quarterback or whatever and he got bitten it fucking what if he had it's to say the big game so he got high in the bathroom

right before last period and it was and so he's super high he's flying like niggle oh this is so cool i'm so high he gets bit suddenly the drugs turn on him as drugs well and he's like oh my god there is a zombie outbreak and then he's freaking out yeah for the rest of the night he doesn't play in the football game yeah and then he goes on to have a really successful career right very satisfying because he would have become a drug head and right didn't because he was like well i'm never doing that was like his trigger to be like i'm doing i'm not doing drugs because he would have moved you know gateway drugs or things he was definitely on his way to gateway that's right however i really wish this had been a that's how we fell in love story my god because they

still can be his arm his arm fit into her mouth oh when does that ever happen oh like a puzzle piece she said like a puzzle like a heart shaped puzzle piece listen maybe they're both divorces they've you know they've had their like Brentwood High when you have your 25th anniversary reunion what's it called anniversary right birthday when you have your 25th birthday as a high school when you have your big high school birthday what if he had had a crush on her the whole time and he had been wanting to ask her out and then he was about he's coming around he was like you're an eagle man you can fucking do this and then she bit him she bit him and then he was like if that's kind of a sign that she's not into me if she liked me she wouldn't have bit down on my arm wouldn't have

bit me right or i i fucked this up because i put my problem like if you're six five in high school you've already you've hit puberty and you have a hairy arm and he's like i stuck my hairy fucking arm and in my crush now what if separate from the the romance we're projecting onto this what if it was just a thing where he never lifted his arms again ever like he would that suddenly that was a that that's like a new fear he has or he's just like i can't put my arms out he was trying to get the nickname the eagle and that day it died he when he saw the movie titanic he screamed so loud in the theater that he had to lose he had he was very triggered by titanic oh my god we did it near far wait there's more to this oh wow shit anyway thank you for

all the laughs and the real talk moments surrounding mental health your podcast has helped me more than you know oh a smiley face with a colon and a closed parentheses sdgm sdgm sdgm no i don't know if it's no stay or no sexy but just sdgm and don't ever yawn without being up to date on your rabies vaccine allison allison thank you wonderful story allison thank you for letting us riff giving us a chance to finally riff allison thank you for letting us be a part of your biting story if you've got a biting story or a fly like an eagle story or a joe biden story even please let us give a rabies story i remember like in the 80s rabies was a real thing to be scared about that's because kujo was such a wonderful film wonderful film and partially

shot in pedaluma oh i didn't know that yeah there's a part in in kujo where they're driving to the mechanics house and it's how we used to go home to and from schools pedaka avenue yeah and when i saw it in the movie i was just like we've made it yes you have stars my brother in high school who was he wasn't he was on a bad track and he had a move with my dad and my dad was like every boy needs a dog to get responsible with and so he got my brother they went to the rescue and there was a puppy and they took him home and he was the sweetest dumbest dog you've ever met he brought my cat the ball once to like throw the ball like he was just so sweet and stupid and my brother named him kujo because he wasn't because he was an angsty teen with a fucking bad attitude and this

dumb sweet baby was named kujo he was our like childhood dog that's hilarious um right your fuck we don't care what the story is we won't remember we're even asking for it so just write it in we just want to hear from you right tell us tell us a story write your future your future memoir stories that you're trying to to get some humor around that you still can't tell anyone you can be anonymous write them to us and we'll make fun of them sure also i think in this episode i think there was a little undercurrent of meat cutes if you have a good meat cute story for your relationship whether it's yes like um kelsey's parents on the train or COVID imagined meat cute yeah like a future like a co have you met someone in COVID that's like oh i never you

know what i mean i found someone living in the walls of my house finally one of the one of those stories he said his name was COVID jack and we fell in love yeah i love meat cute stories yeah if it's real in a better don't creepypasta us with the meat cute no further meat i look at creepypasta so mad at you what a waste of time this mini so it is almost an oh shit we gotta get out of here all right stay sexy and don't get murdered goodbye Elvis do you want a cookie