My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark - MFM Minisode 400

Episode Date: September 9, 2024

This week’s hometowns include long-lost snacks and a forged birth certificate. Support this podcast by shopping our latest sponsor deals and promotions at this link: https://bit.ly/3UFCn1g Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Get Uber One for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may vary. Eligibility and member terms apply. Hello and welcome to my favorite murder. The mini-sode. The 400th fucking mini-sode. I mean, we've done this so many times. How Is that possible? It's pretty wild. And listen, we couldn't have done it without you literally, because we're literally reading you your stories. So thank you to everyone who's contributed.

Whether or not you've gotten on, there's 400 more to go. And what an incredible thing this has developed into, where our listeners can tell us not just the horrifying crime stories that they grew up with or near, but now at this point, kind of anything. Yeah. We're just talking about stuff. It's become really special and a really cool place for like stories. So thank you guys for enjoying that and thank you for contributing or just enjoying. Here's number 400. You want to go first?

Sure. Here's number 400. You want to go first? Sure. The subject line is, a hard to beat vacation disaster story, 2.5 to 3 minute read. Perfect. And then it just says, to the gorgeous and wonderful MFM team, I've been listening to your lovely voices since 2018 and I'm forever grateful for this podcast. Y'all have been keeping me company during the 12-hour days I spent working as a geologist

at a structural engineering firm and the countless hours I've spent mowing my 27 acres of land. Holy shit. Can I have some of what you take every morning? Because Jesus. This person loves land. But enough about me. Let's get to the juicy stuff. In Minnesota 354, it's crazy. y'all asked for vacation disaster stories.

I immediately procrastinated by writing this email and letting it sit on my desktop for weeks. But now that I have nothing to do until the fire academy starts, I figured the time is now. I grew up in southern New Jersey and was extremely fortunate enough to be able to go on vacations with my parents to the Caribbean almost every summer when I was a kid. While the Caribbean in the summer might not seem strange, it should raise red flags for the people in the South who know full well that Atlantic hurricane season is from June

1st to November 30th. No! Yeah, I didn't know that. So if you guessed that I've experienced a storm on vacation, let alone three category five hurricanes, you'd be correct. Bonus points for guessing that one of those storms was Hurricane Katrina. Holy shit.

And the super bonus, well, that goes to the ones who may have guessed I was on a cruise ship. Oh my God, a lot of guessing. Who out there guessed all those right? Someone got it. Someone got it. And then it says, yes, you read that correctly. I was on a fucking cruise ship in the Gulf of Mexico with Hurricane Katrina. Of course, this was almost 20 years ago, but I vividly remember a few things. Number one, my dad excitedly told us to get up to see the pool water sloshing to the deck

above it when he ran back to our room to get the video camera. When we returned with him, they'd already drained the pool. Number two, because the ship was rocking so hard, they had to pull most of the shade shut in the dining room to help the unfortunate souls with seasickness. However, if you were daring enough, you could see the waves and the water level all the way up to the fifth deck of the ship. Now I'm not a shipbuilder, but if we use the average height of a building story, that's about 50 feet. Number three, I was obsessed with a kid's version of Chex Mix that was in a green bag and had Captain Crunch in it. I haven't found it since then, and I wistfully think about it from time to time.

They make it special for that cruise line. I love it. But that idea that we're in the middle of a hurricane story, and it's like, I also loved this Chex Mix so much. There was this snack. And then it says, was I terrified? Yes. Do I believe that my life since then has been a simulation and that my body has been at the bottom of the gulf since 2005?

Of course. I love it. Did I have the best sleep of my life that night? You're damn right. Wow. Because the whole boat was rocking them to sleep. Thank you for everything you continue to do for the community and everyone. Please make sure you're registered to vote.

Let's finally vote a woman into office this November. Kelsey, she, her. Hell yeah, Kelsey. Nice one, Kelsey. Oh my God, that was great. Let's do forgotten snacks of our childhoods that like, or like not even that you know existed, but like, like I know for a very short time, there were wasabi flavored Funyuns and they don't exist anymore. It's been over a decade,

but I can't stop thinking about them. Yeah, that's a good one. There was a lot of candy that we used to get that was like the late seventies, early eighties, like the super big, they were like sweet tarts that were huge. And they would, I think they came three or four in a pack and like all different flavors and you would pick, the flavors were random. So you would be like, that one has two grapes and no lemon. I'm not getting that. You'd be standing there trying to get it. They don't make those anymore. What were they called? Do you remember? I'm going to text my sister and see if by the end of this episode, she can give us that answer because she might know.

Yes, a special 400th episode. Text from your sister, Laura. The only way my sister would participate in this podcast is through text. So let's see. OK, my first one's called Third Time's a Charm, Past Live Story. Hello, Karen in Georgia, longtime listener, multiple time writer, inner, and brand new fan cult member. Thank you. Thank you.

You are all amazing and you know it, so let's get into it. You asked for past live stories, well, here is mine. When I was 15, my mom took me to see a psychic who specialized in past life readings. She told me a few stories, but two of them stuck with me the most. Of all the stories, she me, I was a female merchant living in, you guessed it, Atlantis. As fascinating as it sounded to my 15 year old mind, the story took a dark turn quickly. She proceeded

to tell me I died after being brutally raped and beaten in front of my son, who happens to be my brother in real in this life. No, thank you. Who the fuck tells a teenager that? No, that's not. No. Right? And it's your brother.

What? No. Hi. No. I know. In the other story, she proclaimed I was a male Asian fisherman with the ability to communicate with fish. She claimed she had seen me teaching my son how to ask the fish for permission to be caught and thank them for their sacrifice. Isn't that a children's

book? Maybe. Well, maybe. At least that sounds just a slightly lighter and more fanciful, something to think about as opposed to like, yeah. After the session, I found myself leaning towards believing these fantastical stories. However, I couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of what might be going on in her mind if she was just coming up with them on the spot. She was. Stay sexy and take your child to a psychic so they understand their past life trauma.

Katie She Her. P.S. shout out to my friends Rachel and Kayla for introducing me to your podcast and book. We can't wait to see you live in Arizona. Hint, hint, nudge, nudge. I've got enough trauma in this fucking life to deal with. Exactly, past life trauma. No, you got out. You got away. That life's over.

Your brother's still kind of a dick. Just go with it. Don't, don't. You don't have to. Georgia, do you ever look at your dog and think, who the hell are you and where did you come from? I used to think that with Cookie, but thanks to Embark, I don't have to wonder anymore. That's right, because Embark provides the most accurate dog DNA test on the market,

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Visit EmbarkVet.com and use promo code murder to save $50 today. Goodbye. You know, Georgia, I love putting things off. I cannot recommend it enough. Oh there's nothing better like why do something now when you can just simply do it later. Exactly but when you need a doctor waiting weeks for an appointment is not an option. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can

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So stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to zocdoc.com slash murder to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's z-o-c-d-o-c dot com slash murder. Zocdoc.com slash murder. Goodbye. The subject line of this email is a badass woman of history. And it says long but worth it. Not too long. Good day all.

Here's another email from the random shit pile. It's a bit long, so let's get into it. My great aunt Gertrude Lattery Savage was truly a badass bitch. She was born in 1911 as one of 13 children in a small town in Alberta, Canada, and lived quite the life from then on. She grew up helping her dad do chores around the farm rather than helping her mother with household duties. In high school, Gertie decided she wanted to get into boxing and quickly went undefeated becoming a local

champ. A top female boxer from nearby Edmonton challenged her to a fight and in Gerdy's words, didn't last a round. Her fighting expertise came in handy when a fellow got a bit too rowdy at her house and wouldn't leave. He did eventually leave with a broken jaw. She entered into steer writing events at the rodeo when women weren't allowed to compete, so she dressed like a man and competed anyway.

She then became a winning jockey but quit because she couldn't stand the way the horses were treated. After her many adventures she started a family and a farm of her own until the 1980s when she downsized to a smaller home where she would stay doing yard work and tending to her garden every day until her death in 2015 at the age of 104. Oh, fuck. Yes. I love her. Gertie always attributed her long life to, quote, being too goddamn busy to get old. And said of her life, quote, I lived my life as I wanted, independent.

Thanks so much for reading this and thank you for keeping me occupied while I work every day as an electrician. Stay sexy and don't get old, Rob. Oh my God. Love that, love Gertie. A boxer, that's so bad ass. So that's probably the 1920s. She became a female boxer like that. Love Gertie. A boxer. That's so badass. So that's probably the 1920s. She became a female boxer like that.

Where like women weren't allowed to wear pants. Yeah. I mean, or like it was looked down upon, you know? Yeah. God. Damn. Hell yeah, Gertie. Hell yeah. Okay. Here's my grandma's forged birth certificate. And then it says in parentheses,

Italian mafia, just to sweeten the pot a little bit. Hello, ladies. I'm a day one listener and I love the way you tell true crime stories. This is truly my favorite podcast and I can't listen to other true crime podcasts because they just don't compare. Thank you for fucking saying it. Wow. Anyways, let's get into it.

There are a lot of good true crime podcasts you should listen to. My grandmother was born in 1924 Chicago, specifically Little Italy. Growing up, she said the Italian mob was a normal and everyday part of their lives. In her neighborhood, every few blocks, there would be a house owned by the mob and that was who you'd pay your dues to. She said as long as you paid your fee, you were safe, protected, and had nothing to worry about. Anyways, when she was 15, she went to apply for her first job.

After learning she'd need her birth certificate to prove citizenship, she went home and found that it was missing. When she asked her mom, she said, oh, you don't have a birth certificate, but don't worry. We'll just ask our man on the corner. So my grandmother and great grandmother walked to the house on the corner of their street, knocked on the door, and waited for the mob to answer. When he answered, my grandmother explained her situation

and politely asked if he could get her a birth certificate. He said, no problem, sweetie, you'll have one by the end of the week. A week goes by and sure enough, he knocks on their front door, hands her a sealed envelope, and went on his way. Until she died at the age of 95. This was the only birth certificate she ever had. Unfortunately, she didn't end up getting the job, but she said it was because of the prejudice against Italians, not because of her sketchy birth certificate.

Stay sexy and don't lose your birth certificate, G. She kept it the whole time. Yeah. That's well, it was as real as any government paperwork to her that just like, that's the one I got. I love it. I mean, conceptually, conceptually, the mafia can be a good idea,

but the mafia, HOAs, it's all the same. Right. But then it gets corrupted and people love power. Totally. And then it's like not what not what they promise. No. Such is life. Hey, Karen, have you ever felt the sense of unease when you leave your home, wondering if everything will be safe? I mean, I'd say I feel a sense of unease for most of my waking hours. Oh, yeah, I get that. But with Simply Safe, you can at least give yourself peace of mind about your home security. Simply Safe knows that in a yeah, I get that. But with SimpliSafe, you can at least give yourself peace of mind about your home security.

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It's no surprise why SimpliS, half the price of traditional home security. It's no surprise why SimpliSafe has been named the best home security system by U.S. News and World Report for five years running. Once you purchase your system, you can choose your installation process. It's easy to do yourself or you can have a pro do it for you. We've recently started putting our alarm on even when we're just taking Cookie for a walk because a lot of burglaries, it turns out, happen during the daytime. So even when I'm taking Cookie for like a long walk, it's still a great opportunity for burglars. So I set my alarm, I have this peace of mind,

I try not to forget to unset it when I open the door. I usually fail, but we're safe. That's right. So protect your home with 50% off a new Simply Safe system, plus a free indoor security camera when you sign up for Fast Protect monitoring. Just visit simplisafe.com slash fave. That's simplisafe.com slash fave. There's no safe like SimpliSafe. Goodbye. Okay, here's my last one. And that subject line is laughing while my sister cried. Zipper ride related. Hi ladies, I've lost count of how many submissions I've sent in, but I find it therapeutic even if they're not read. And then in parentheses, but all caps, it says, don't give up everyone.

Which is my favorite phrase, I think, right now. Don't give up everyone. Karen mentioning dying laughing from the backseat while Laura learned to drive in the most recent mini-sode reminded me of a similarly hilarious memory with my sister, Danica. My dad traveled a lot when we were little, so when he was home, he would find any excuse to take us out of school and to local events

like hot air balloon festivals, petting zoos, and in this story's case, our Central Texas County Fair. My memory leading up to this core memory is fuzzy. I just remember my sister and I, who were both under 10 years old at the time, getting strapped into a seat that was oddly positioned at an angle with a metal lap bar and then locked into a rickety metal cage. This fucking ride. No.

That's right. As Karen may have guessed from her own experience with the ride, my father had let us go on the sketchiest carnival ride of all time, the zipper. The ride started well enough. It was a small metal cage going around with the other cages in a ferris wheel formation, but before we knew it, the cage itself began to spin and my older sister lost her shit. She immediately began sobbing and my older sister lost her shit. She immediately began sobbing.

And when that didn't work to stop the nightmare, she began singing Jesus loves me at the top of her lungs. Can I just say as a little sister, how scary is it when your big sister is freaking out? Because you're like, it's like when you look at the flight attendant and they're freaking out. You're like, Oh no. Completely. Yes. That's the person you're just supposed to be moving into their wake and following whatever they do.

And when they don't know what to do, you're like, well, then no one knows what to do. It feels better to get made fun of by your older sibling than for them to be freaking out. A thousand percent. Completely. OK, so she's maybe younger than 10 year old is turning to the Lord to be saved from this carnival ride. Then it says, we went to a Lutheran school

and I imagine this was the only thing her poor little adolescent brain could think of to soothe her from this traumatic experience. I found the entire situation not only hilarious, but fun. And I couldn't help but laugh the entire time. I will never forget how funny it was to have my sister on one side preparing to meet her maker while at the same time,

seeing my tall, handsome Midwestern dad smiling and waving to us anytime this death trap offered us a glimpse of him. Danica doesn't listen to MFM regularly cause she's still a little bitch. Just kidding, Danica, if you do hear this, I love you. And the last thing, thank you, Karen and Georgia for being surrogate older sisters to me. Normalizing mental health is the reason that I was able to get through struggles

with infertility and postpartum disorders. I definitely wouldn't be where I am today without you too. All the love in the world, Jocelyn." Oh my God. That's so touching. Like, it's not just Danica. It's us too. We're her older sisters too. Danica. Okay. But we'll, we'll be calm when we get on that crazy ass ride. I will never fucking get on that ride again. No. What was the one where you'd stand against a wall? It was like the one that spun around and around and you got pushed by gravity to the side, but you could like go upside down.

I think the one at Art Fair was like the Gravi-tron. I think it had the word gravity in the title. Yes, I went on that multiple times. And then you can see photos of it from back then sometimes, and it's like, here's what would never happen again today. Never. But it was fun because you could tell gravity was going to help you. In the zipper fun because you could tell gravity was gonna help you.

In the zipper, that metal bar had fucking dents in it. It felt more aluminum than any other metal. Like it felt so unsafe. And if you got a bad carny, which I'm sure not allowed to call them anymore, but it's what we called them in the eighties, if you got a mean one, if you are screaming like crazy, when you pass by, they would spin your fucking thing. Fuck that shit.

So you're already going around and then you'd be like, triple going around. Oh my God. No. Please don't ever make me be a kid again. I spent so much fucking time at the fair. It really sucks. Okay. My last one's kind of long. It's called Blockbuster Beatdown. What's up, you beautiful bitches? The number of times that I've been driving and listening to MFM wanting to write and submit this hometown is more than I can count. And look, here we are. Let's get into it. On the 400th episode. You made it. On the best one.

My family spent a few years in Yorkton, Saskatchewan when I was under the age of five, so forgive my hazy memory and reliance on family lore. Every weekend, our routine was a symphony of nostalgia, Subway sandwiches, rippled chips, chocolate milk, and it says, a meal that sounds as disgusting as it is memorable. And of course, a trip to Blockbuster. This ritual kept my parents sane while wrangling four kids under eight. Ooh. One Friday, my dad packed us all into our Astrovan and we made our way to Subway and the convenience store. Everything seemed routine until my dad noticed two men going into the blockbuster with ski masks over their faces. Uh-oh.

Being that it was a small town, he knew that it was a young girl in her 20s who always worked on Friday nights. And so he sprang into action like he was auditioning for a hero role in a low-budget action film. He quietly snuck into the blockbuster and was able to overpower one guy, who turned out to be an older teenager, while the other one ran out the front door and ditched his friend. Holy shit.

My dad may or may not have exchanged a few punches with the kids. He was in a ski mask and robbing a blockbuster. I think a few punches were warranted. Until the kid ran off after realizing he messed with the wrong blockbuster. The worker was grateful, and I'm sure we got a few free rentals out of the whole ordeal.

I hope so. It says, no wonder they went out of business. My dad came back into the van, and we returned home. My mom was met with four kids raving about what dad did and she didn't seem at all that impressed. And it says they divorced a few years later, four kids can do that to a marriage. At this point, this man is a true superhero out in the world

and she's like, whatever, it's not solving any of our problems. This story is one of my favorites to talk about my dad. He was always willing to stick up for people deserving of it and took care of those around him. He took on so many different ventures, often calling himself a jack of all trades and a master of none. And he always showed us unconditional love. Sadly, my dad was killed by a distracted driver

while he was on a motorcycle trip with his friends in September of 2019. It's approaching five years since the worst day of my life, but I remember with fondness all of the times he was a badass. After he passed, I had a message request from someone I didn't recognize. I opened it and was from the blockbuster employee that he defended.

She told me she always had a huge crush on my dad after that, and she was always appreciative of him for the day he saved her. She wasn't the only one to confess her admiration for my dad after he died. Several women did. He resembled Tom Selleck, and apparently that got the ladies going even posthumously. That's why the mom was just like, uh-huh.

Oh, did you? Right. While losing my dad was the hardest thing I've ever had to endure, it opened my eyes to a whole new world. Shortly after he was killed, I started the process of suing for wrongful death. I was exposed to various aspects of the justice system and ended up finding a love for it. In June of 2024, I graduated with a Juris Doctorate, law degree, and moved to Edmonton,

Alberta to start my career and to provide legal services to those who need it most. Losing my dad and all the legalities that came with it turned out to be a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, and I am thankful for my ability to work hard through my grief. Very shortly after my dad died, I found her podcast. It felt good to laugh again and truly felt like I had two friends constantly joking around while I just listened. I struggled with immense anxiety for years following his death, but I always felt a sense of relief when I put my AirPods in and could hear the familiar hellos from the both of you. Thank you for always being a support to me even though I

didn't realize it. You got me through a lot and continue to bring a smile to my face when I listen to each episode. Recognizing both of your growth as individuals has also been something that I've enjoyed and commend you both on. Stay sexy and watch out for motorcyclists and always be willing to participate in a blockbuster beatdown. Cheers, bitches. Teagan. Teagan.

I have a love in my throat. Yeah, that was beautiful. Also perfect, perfect last email for the 400th episode of like, first of all, of course, always horrible to lose a parent, especially like that where it's like accidental and feels like it shouldn't have happened. But on top of that, you know,

there are a lot of mediocre dads out there. There's a lot of bad dads out there. It's rare when you get a dad that truly is like the kind of person that would be like, something's happening and I'm going to do something about it. Totally. Brave, strong, obviously good looking. I mean like, you know, Tegan,

you had a dad that people miss and would miss. And Tegan, I bet he's fucking proud of you. Yeah. We are. Yeah, good job. You became a lawyer. What the hell? Like, what about us? How did you remember all those laws?

So many. Jesus. Oh my god. Hey, we're proud of all of you. We've been here 400 episodes. Thank you guys so freaking much. Like, honestly, this is such a little special part of this podcast that every time I see it on my schedule

to record, I'm like, yay, this is going to be fun because we're all just talking. Always fun. You every time I see it on my schedule to record, I'm like, yay, this is going to be fun because we're all just talking. Always fun. You know? I love it. Always fun. So great. Yeah. Thanks, you guys. 400. Insane. Oh, and here's a text from my sister in classic Laura Kogera formation. It's just a picture of the candy. I guess they do still make it.

And they were Sweet Tart's giant chewy. Oh, chewy. So they're like a sweet tart, but that big like a silver dollar like a size of a quarter. Yeah, pretty big. And then not super hard so you can kind of like get in there a little bit. When we do our candy salad, you can bring those. Oh, yeah. Good idea. Those will act as the kind of like get in there a little bit. When we do our candy salad you can bring those. Oh yeah good idea. Those will act as the kind of tomato slices on our candy salad. Yeah. Well stay sexy. And don't get murdered. Goodbye. Elvis do you want a cookie? This has been an exactly right production. Our senior producer is Alejandra Keck.

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo. This episode was mixed by Liana Scolacci. Email your hometowns to MyFavoriteMurder at gmail.com. And follow the show on Instagram and Facebook at My Favorite Murder and on Twitter at MyFaveMurder. Goodbye!