My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark - MFM Minisode 51

Episode Date: December 25, 2017

Karen and Georgia read your Christmas-themed hometown stories including a tale of caroling gone wrong, a ceramic Christmas tree, a grandmother’s conversation with the mob, and more!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We at Wondery live, breathe and downright obsess over true crime and now we're launching the ultimate true crime fan experience, Exhibit C. Join now by following Wondery, Exhibit C on Facebook and listen to true crime on Wondery and Amazon Music, Exhibit C. It's truly criminal. Hi, hello and welcome to a very special Christmas episode. Oh my favorite. The Devil Christmas episode. It's perfect. I was just wanted to let everyone know contrary to our last episode what we said, we actually did get Stephen something for Christmas. We really did, Georgia went downstairs and then remembered that we were so

such good friends, so kindly and grateful for Stephen's presence, that we picked him up a little something at Ozark Land, which was a wonderful place that we stopped in between St. Louis and Kansas City. It's someone called a resting stop. They do call it a resting stop in the deep south. There's fudge, there's wind chimes, there's like prank things, what do they call them? Yeah, like an electric gum or whatever you got. Yeah. Goose. Goofs. Goofs. I say goose eggs. There's moccasins, which I bought and I'm not totally sure is, I'm still not 100 percent sure is not a cultural appropriation. I think it 100 percent is. It is, right? It is, but I feel like that moccasins are sold by Native Americans or

Indigenous people. Are we sure about that? Yeah. Why would I ever fucking say that? Why would I say that? Here's what they also had at Ozark Land. A firework that is a chicken that shoots a firework egg out of its ass. Listen. My favorite thing, look. When has anything been better than that? Simply the best, but then, oh, I'll tell you when something has been better than that. When we stumbled down the Wooden Jewelry Box aisle, trying to pick gifts and then Georgia spotted probably the greatest gift ever made that we had to buy for Stephen, which was... Do you want to describe it, Stephen? It's your gift. I mean, it's nothing short of a majestic creation scene of dinosaurs and there's a sunset and it's gorgeous. It's like a lockbox for your

keepsakes. Yes. With dinosaurs, pot. Crystals, pot. It's a wooden pot box with dinosaurs, but not like carved in. It's not like wood burning tool thing. It's just a picture of dinosaurs near Lake. It's a beautiful mural. Yeah, it's a mural and we filled it with bath salts. That's right. So you can snort them and go insane. There you go. Thank you. You're welcome. Merry Christmas. Sorry, Elvis. Elvis, it's okay. I'm just screaming. Well, today's Christmas. Merry Christmas, everybody. We're about to give you some Christmas mini-sowed hometowns. These are your stories that you send us. These are stories of murder, mayhem, and of course, Christmas. And merry, and merry making. Murder, mayhem, and Methuselah, the great character from the Bible,

one of my favorites, and also murder. Okay. Do you want me to go first? Of course. This, the subject line is, I lived in a haunted as fuck completely preserved house from the 60s. Yes. Hello. That's a Merry Christmas to me and you. EA. Hello, Karen, Georgia, Stephen, and company. Nice. Perfect. I know that you did hidden things last week, but I thought maybe this was bigger than, quote, in the walls. My ex-wife's family lived in a tiny town called West Point, Virginia, two stoplights, 10 churches, and a paper mill. Jesus. Jesus and fart smells was in parentheses. Oh my God. I had one of those things, right? Yeah, you did. Psychic. Yeah, yeah. Before we met, her parents lived in the only apartment building in town and across the street was the oldest

house in town. It was a converted schoolhouse that was expanded upon in the 50s, maybe. Amazing. The old lady that lived there ended up going nuts. Yay. Yes. This is actually a pun. She was taken away because she was talking to squirrels in the attic. Oh, I do that. Am I crazy? I have yelled at the squirrel. I've told you about the squirrel that goes across the telephone wire in my backyard every morning at 730. No. So we have a whole system where it's like, I say to George, I'm going to let you out, but you cannot bark. And then she looks at me like, got it. And then we go out there and that's fine. Every time she's like, but this time I'm not going to. She's like, I've learned. I saw how mad you got last time. I won't do it. And this squirrel comes out and

it's like, where are you going? Why is it at the same time every morning? Are you on your way to work? The groundhog stay for this poor squirrel. He is. He has this shitty job. All right. Okay. Okay. So, uh, D do do. Well, when she got taken away, the house went up for auction as is. As is. Oh my God. All the furniture and all her clothes and all the things. As is, baby. I wanted, I wanted my ex's family bought it and carried everything they owned across the street. That's amazing. Being a Polish family, that wasn't much. And like I said, the house was left as is. My mother-in-law was a little nuts herself and decided she liked the way the old lady decorated it and left nearly everything. By the time I moved in, the things that we left included

everything on the walls, knickknacks and cabinets, the entire preserved 60s Coca-Cola kitchen, diner, red counters, fold out table and all. Oh, and the entire attic. Addict. My toes are curled. Addict has a capital A. I don't know if that was intentional, but that's how we feel about this. Addict. Addict. When I first moved in, I would just go through drawers and find grocery lists and notebooks. Oh honey, I love you. It says in parentheses, pork chops were always for dinner. That's amazing. Old glass medicine bottles and such. Yes. My ex, my ex knew I loved history, so she would eventually let me explore the attic. Guys, she never threw away anything. I love her. There were magazines, puzzles. I took some original

Disney kids puzzles and some magazines on Vietnam. I sold those motherfuckers. And some postcards. Yeah, I bet it made a little. Books, old tin, stamp collections, Boy Scout uniforms, Christmas decorations. What? It was crazy. The sad part is a lot of it was damaged from, you guessed it, squirrels. Those dirty fucking squirrels. They sent her to the loony bin and then they ate everything. Those assholes. There's like, you know, like still, there's like whatever, baseball cards, the first baseball card ever made, but a squirrel. It's like halfway through eating it, like a cracker. Like what? Oh, what do you mean? This is worth $10 million. The, a Babe Ruth baseball that I'm eating like a nut. I put into my cheeks like a,

okay, ready? Living in that house was like living in a preserved 1960s house. So jealous. Pink bathroom and all. It was also very haunted. Good. My ex and I lived in the basement at the time, and it was part of the original schoolhouse. We would. Children laughing. Children laughing. Okay, ready? We would hear movement upstairs. The main room of the schoolhouse when no one else was home all the time. And we just grew to ignore it. I heard kids talking and saw white mists occasionally. Chalk. Not fucking chalk. Chalk. That's actually could totally do what it is. You know, when like you bang two racers together. Yeah, you have to clean the racers because you were talking in class. Still ghostiest fuck. Yes. It's ghost chalk dust. Yeah. The

scariest kind. You're like, you can't get any allergy pillow for that. No. And it will give you mesothelioma. Okay. It's also mold. Okay. Asbestos. Go ahead. Also not scary because I just pretended I was seeing stuff. Then one day we got the shit scared out of us. Yes. She was in the shower and I was on the computer in the living room, a desktop with an old desk that you had to slide the keyboard out of. I was done with the computer and put the mouse and the keyboard back in the desk and went to talk to her in the bathroom. I came out of the bathroom and the keyboard and the mouse were on top of the desk. I shook it off, went downstairs to get dressed. Now downstairs was technically outside because you had to walk through a sun porch to

get there. And when I came back, my ex looked at me terrified and said, you weren't up here. I told her no, I was getting dressed. She told me she heard me yell her name while she was getting dressed in the bathroom and it sounded like I was yelling through a fan. Clearly I was downstairs. She turned white and we left for the day with all kinds of fuck that as we drove away. What does that mean yelling? Yes. Have you never yelled into a fan? Of course I have. Luke. Yeah, I always do the um the poltergeist. Mommy. Oh no. Okay. What did you mean by what does that mean? I just wanted it like hear it, I guess. Oh yeah, yeah. Okay. Mommy. We live there for six more months. It's always the story. So you, so there you go. The oldest house in West Point, Virginia is haunted

as fuck, haunted as fucking full of abandoned artifacts. Your podcast has changed my life, blah, blah, blah. SSTGM Jackie. Thanks Jackie. Awesome. That was fun. Oh my god. Okay. This is called not one double homicide, but two double homicides in one story. Shit. Hello Karen, Stephen. Nope. Hello Karen, Georgia, Stephen and assorted furry friends. First I want to thank you for an awesome show in Kansas City. I had quite the adventure getting to your show. My boyfriend and I traveled from Tulsa and we were at a coffee shop just down the street from the Midland before the show went out of nowhere. I started feeling funny. According to my boyfriend, Jimmy, I said I think I'm about to black out, then slumped forward. He pushed me back to see my face and I fell backward

on the stool. I was sitting on and hit my head against the wall. Oh, Jimmy. Jimmy. Don't move a corpse. Jimmy. He pulled me back into his arms and from that position, I vomited onto the floor in the super classy coffee shop. Poor Jimmy. The next thing I remember, I was in Jimmy's arms and I had a horrible taste in my mouth. My first coherent thought was, I can't miss the show. We went to the bathroom to clean up and I began to have the worst pain in my abdomen I have ever had in my life. I was just about to give up and go to the hospital and suddenly the pain went away and I started to feel normal again just in time for the show. What the fuck? It was the weirdest thing that's ever happened to me and I want to take a moment to publicly thank my fellow murderinos

that were at the shop because there was a nice group of us who called 911 for me and helped keep an eye on me while all this was happening. Jesus Christ. Sorry if I scared you. Also, sorry to the coffee shop for the mess I made. Yeah. She says, okay, here's my hometown murder. Oh, that's it. It's not the story of Jimmy and the bar. No. Okay. Oh my God. All right. Okay. Back on Christmas morning, 1999 in Tyler, Texas, Stephen and Carla Barron were found murdered in their bed, each with a gunshot in the head. The murder weapon was found hidden in the laundry of the couple's 17 year old daughter, Stephanie. It was published that she murdered them because they grounded her. While investigating this double homicide, police find that the weapon is tied to

another crime that occurred back on October 24th. On that day, a burglary set a house on fire to cover his crime. The fire spread to a neighboring home where Shelly Haynes was sleeping with her three year old daughter, Hannah, both became trapped and tragically died. The handgun that was used to murder the barons was the one was one of the items stolen in the burglary, which was done by Stephanie's boyfriend, Denario Jones. Stephanie was sorry. Shelly was a lovely woman. And I know this because she worked with my mother. My mother was devastated by the deaths. And to honor them, she picked the name Ping for her grandchildren to call her. Hannah couldn't say my mom's name, Penny. She always called her Ping. The two murders, the two murderers, Stephanie and Denario were

both found guilty of their crimes and have been put away for a very long time. Good riddance. The story is on an episode of Oxygen's Homicide for the Holidays. Oh my. Of course. God. And I highly recommend it. The details of both these crimes is heartbreaking. Thanks again for a great live show and for your amazing podcast that it helps me in more ways than I can list here, especially since I'm trying to keep this short. Happy Holidays to you guys and all my fellow murderinos, SSDGM, Lisa. Hi, Lisa. That's intense. Lisa, I need you to make sure that your appendix hasn't burst. Yeah. Well, don't come to our show. Next time you're fucking it, you pass out and hit your head.

Hey, you know what? You'd like to think that that would work, but some people are just into it. Sure. They don't give a shit. Oh, honey. That's amazing. I love the way that those shows have gotten. They are so specific now. It is hilarious. What do you mean? Oh, I thought you meant our shows. Homicide for the Holidays? All of those ID Channel, Lifetime, all of their shows. So it was like swamp murders. Kin murder. Murder with a mason jar. Yes. It's all like it's gay. Murder with what? Creepy neighbor on the east murder. Creepy neighbor headed west murder. It's just insane. It's so specific. Second cousin murderers. If you can believe it.

So I do love this one. So this subject line is no murder, but there is a head injury. Okay. Hi, people and animals. I just listened to your show about finding stuff and walls and it reminded me of this story. In the late 80s, when I was about eight or nine, my parents bought an old built in the 1800s house in the small fishing village. My dad grew up in a Nova Scotia. I'd love to go there. So we could spend summers there. The previous owners had both died of old age, so most of their stuff was left in the house. I have a theme. I have a theme in my mind. Most of the stuff was left in the house when we bought it. There were a lot of secret rooms and an attic. I remember finding a red leather notebook that had belonged to a school teacher.

It was full of her lesson plans in the most intricate handwriting I've ever seen dated 1897. All caps. Why did I not keep this? She did not keep it. There were also tons of old pictures and books attached to the house was a giant barn that was so full of stuff that you couldn't walk through it. Oh my God. There was no way anyone had been in there in years. Oh, I'm dying. Amazing. This is like, I have dreamed of things like this, where it's like, then you go through and then you're seeing things from your childhood and you're seeing like, Oh, you want your own. I want anyone's. Oh, you just want some stuff. Well, yeah, that's fun too, because then it's a surprise. But it's with your own shit. You're like, Oh my God, I was a genius. I never knew.

I would, I would consider seriously consider murdering another person if I could just stand in my old room and look at the toys that we used to have. My thing is always like, okay, how many years of your life would you give up? Like, let's say you're going to live to be 89. Like, okay, how many years of your life would you get? Would you get up three years to see you diet? Yes. How many is that? Happily. So you died 86. Did I say 89, 86 to go do that? Yes. Okay. I mean, like, happily, because there's things in there that like, I have one picture of me and my sister when I'm, we're like, you know, probably five and six. And it's the day, Christmas day, we have Christmas chambers on and we are playing with the toys we got all at once

on the floor of our room. And it's the earliest version of our room. So it's like, yeah, everything about it is the earliest version. So it's the one that's the hardest to remember. And I can see every like, remember that. Then why do you need to go back if you can see it? Well, I want to see, I want to be there in real life. But what, but what's the difference? Because I can't see everything. And like, I want to, I don't know, I want to like, look out the window and shit, the boring shit. I don't know. It's, there is like, remember that farm, it's a farmhouse that you open and then like those little plastic animals, like a Fisher price, but it's like Legos, but they were bigger. Yeah, it is. I think it is Fisher price. Yeah, those people that you stick in things. Yes.

Like that's one of like 50 things on the shelf. Like I want to go through those books and be like, Oh my God, these are the books we used to read. Why am I again, only talking about myself for nine hours. Okay, let's go back to the giant barn filled with strangers Nova Scotian antiques. There we are. Here we are. The first day we pulled up to the houses, but our first summer there, there was this man who was about 40 walked by. Oh, there this man who was about 40 walked by pointed to the barn and said, there's a Christmas tree in there. And he kept walking. My father told me that he had had an ATV accident in his teens and he suffered brain damage. And now he just spent his days walking around the town nonstop day after

day, he would walk by point to the barn and say, there's a Christmas tree in there. My parents had decided to leave the barn until the next summer because it was going to be costly, a costly thing. They had just spent all their money on the house. So the first day of the next summer, the man walks by and starts the Christmas tree nonsense again. This goes on and on until finally the day comes for the barn to come down without okay, they had to disassemble it piece by piece from the outside. So people started to gather to see what was in there. It was mostly junk. We kept a few pieces of antique furniture and some other things, but most of it was thrown away. And as the junk pile started to dwindle, a two foot ceramic Christmas tree was sitting right

in the middle. Oh my God. My dad picked it up and handed it to the guy who was in the crowd that had gathered. He took it, turn around and walked away. Oh, Emily, never existed. That is the best. Oh my God. It's a Christmas miracle. It is like a barn Easter egg. Like so basically what he remembered that from before he had a brain injury. He saw it. Maybe he put it there. He walked into that barn. He just remembered it was there and it was the most it was like implanted in his brain. Yep. And he wanted it, but he wasn't asking for it. But it was like 30 years ago. Well, he took it. Sure. What if he was like, great, what do I do with this now? This stupid thing. This fire hazard. He just throws it over his shoulder. Stupid. Oh my God. I like to think he hated it. It makes

me feel good to think he hated that present and the point of your story. Let me ruin your story. I love that. Let me make you feel bad. It's a Christmas miracle. It's a miracle. Hey, I'm Jewish. Fuck you. I can do whatever the fuck I want. Is that what it is? Are you offended by the Christmas miracle? No. Because you guys had a great oil based miracle. We did have a great oil based miracle. I mean, it's one of the top miracles. People still talk about it. That shit lasted. How many days? Eight. All right. I'm a Catholic who loves Jews. Yay. Looking for a better cooking routine? With meal planning, shopping,

and prepping handled, Hello Fresh has you covered. Hello Fresh makes home cooking easy and affordable so you can stay on track and on budget in the new year. Hello Fresh meals are convenient, seasonal, and delicious. Stay cozy all winter long with classic comfort foods available weekly. Why stop with just dinner? Now you can enjoy Hello Fresh's expanded menu of quick lunch solutions, weekend brunch, simple side dishes, and amazing desserts. Karen, January is going to be my month for Hello Fresh. I am so sick of takeout. I miss cooking so much. I haven't lifted a knife or a pan since early fall. So I can't wait to get back in the kitchen and Hello Fresh makes it so easy and also makes it so that my food tastes good, which is hard to do on my own. It gives you

everything, everything you need. So get up to 20 free meals with purchase plus free shipping on your first box at hellofresh.ca slash murder20 with code murder20. That's up to 20 free meals plus free shipping on your first box when you go to hellofresh.ca slash murder20 and use code murder20. Goodbye. What makes a person a murderer? Are they born to kill or are they made to kill? I'm Candice DeLong and on my new podcast, Killer Psyche Daily, I share a quick 10-minute rundown every weekday on the motivations and behaviors of the criminal masterminds, psychopaths, and cold-blooded killers you hear about in the news. I have decades of experience as a psychiatric nurse, FBI agent, and criminal profiler. On Killer Psyche Daily,

I'll give you insight into cases like Ryan Grantham and the newly arrested Stockton Serial Killer. I'll also bring on expert guests to dive deeper into the details. Share what it's like to work with a behavioral assessment unit at Quantico. Answer some killer trivia and even host virtual Q&As where I'll answer your burning questions. Hey Prime members, listen to the Amazon Music exclusive podcast, Killer Psyche Daily, in the Amazon Music app. Download the app today. Christmas Caroling, a youth group and death. Yes. And this is what you're going to look here. This starts dear Frank, George, and everyone else. Oh, shit. That's called ass kissing. This is called trolling. Cody. This person's name is Cody. Hi Cody. I can see you.

Hi. Okay. Although the story is not a murder, it involves Christmas caroling, a youth group, and death. So I'm hoping this counts. It does. I made the mistake of telling the story to a group of my third graders who were planning on caroling at a nursing home for a Girl Scouts. After watching their reaction, I number one realized it was probably not an appropriate story for third graders. Number two thought it might be more appropriate for a MFM mini-sode. Here goes. Yes. I was an eighth grade and I was involved in a church youth group in a small neighboring village of 200-ish people. This town was mostly full of elderly people who had lived there their entire life. So each Christmas our youth group would walk through the town and sing carols to the shut-ins as we

called them in this rural Ohio town in the 90s. Shut-ins. That's so fucked up. It's very dramatic. And this is like having no idea what old people do with it. Okay. Yeah. They just don't feel like going out anymore. They're sick of the bullshit. You'll get it one day too. I'm there. I'm already there. They're like all 40. I'm about to shut in. I'm borderline starting to nail like big boards across my windows. I'm such a shut-in. Anywho, we stopped at several houses, brightening everyone's Christmas by singing off-key while elderly people listened shivering from their front porch. It was magical. We arrived at one particular house with a large picture window overlooking a wraparound porch. We all climbed up on the porch, rang the doorbell, and waited for the lady to open the door. After

a second attempt at the doorbell, I looked into her window. I immediately saw she would not be answering the door anytime soon. She was sprawled on the floor motionless. No. I can remember it like it was yesterday. I'm 37 and I can still see a beige phone sitting on the table by the door. The hands that was on the floor next to her is that she had tried to call for help. It felt like we stood there staring through her window for quite a while before our youth group leader called 911. We stood across the street and until the ambulance came and we all caps, watch them wheel her out in a body bag. Oh no. This is horrible, but it's like this is how murderinos are made. This is how A, how murderinos are made, and then B, that this person told the

story to a group of third graders of today is so hilarious. I didn't even think about it. It's so good. She's amazing. They're all, wait, what? People die? Oh, what's a body bag, Mrs. Cody? We decided we should walk back to the church, have some hot cocoa, and regroup as you do after stumbling on a dead body. Yeah. After some deliberation and I'm sure a prayer, I roll, we decided these shut-ins were counting on us and we couldn't let one dead body ruin our Christmas spirit. Good. Recharged, we walked to the next house and began to sing. No. The old, older gentleman came out and whispered into my group leader's ear. She immediately told us to stop singing. The house we were at was the sister of the dead woman we had found,

and she had just received a call that her sister had passed just seconds before our caroling had started. This is not real. Cody, why are you a liar? Cody, this is the best movie that I've ever made. This is a Sean Thomas Scott. What's that guy's name? Sean Connery. Yes, that's it. Biopic. Yep. There it is. I'm sure this was quote, God's way of telling us we should call it a night. Yeah. What a freaking holiday to remember. I hope you enjoyed this shit show of a story. Your podcast gives me life. I listen to you through headphones to tune out all my three small children in the car or during my planning time at work so no one is concerned that there is a teacher on staff obsessed with murder and the F word. Can't wait to see you in February

in Columbus. My husband has no idea what he's in for. Cody, our new best friend. Cody. Everything all the time with you, Cody. Cody. Oh shit. Wait, is Cody the one that started Frank George and everyone else? Uh-huh. Cody. You're up there. Nice and Cody. You're on the avenue of stars in terms of a mini said hometown. You really are. This is like, this is kind of like preserved home theme and also old people theme. Okay. So the subject here is the time my grandma got involved with the mob. Yay. Hello everyone. This is the story about the time my grandma got involved with the mob. I love a restatement of the title. Perfect. Got it. And then it says sort of in parentheses. Last Christmas when my grandma was visiting us, I asked her if she had a hometown

murder being that she grew up in Chicago and has lived 1000 lives. Yay. Thank you for doing that. That's where you're going to get the good stuff. That is, if you're listening to this on Christmas right now, run downstairs to your parents who you're fucking sick of. Yes. About your stepdad. You don't know a lot about him, right? Like you've never asked him questions because you don't like him that much. That's right. Rick. He's kind of boring. But, but is he? But is he? He's had two wives before, but you don't know a lot about them. Right. And, and where did they go? Yeah. Where, he talks about a brother, but you've never met his brother. I mean, all of these people, is there proof that they exist? Yeah. That they're alive and that he did not

with his hands kill them. Or is this brother in prison? And that's why he talks about him in past tense. I mean, the possibilities with this stepfather that you have are endless. Yeah. Rick, with the mustache and the Wrangler jeans, God bless you this Christmas season. You're on notice. You're officially on notice. Um, shit, I lost my place. Got it. Okay. Here I am. Here we go. I was totally, I was in the wrong story. We're here with Rick. We're here with Rick. It's not a murder, but it's so hilarious and so like my grandma to have this happen to her. Okay. When my grandparents were newlyweds, so maybe in the fifties or forties, I can't remember, they took a cruise for their honeymoon while lounging by the pool. My grandma started chatting with this woman about tanning

beds and how great it would be to be able to tan in the comfort of your own own sales. She's in sales again in the forties or fifties when they didn't know how dangerous the sun was. Their conversation continued until lunchtime hit and when they parted ways, they decided to exchange room numbers to keep up their new friendship. A few hours went by and my grandma had come across a magazine article that shared the potential dangers of tanning beds. So like a good person, she went to her new friend's room, article in hand to share what she had learned. This sounds totally sounds like something I would do. I'd be like, no, of course they want to hear about this right now. I'm interested. So they're going to be knock on a door. Just do it. Um, when she knocks

on the door, a giant man in a suit answered and asked what her business was. What's your business? After my, when, uh, when my grandma replied, I'm looking for parentheses tanning lady. Um, she was pulled into the room. There she found multiple men in the same suits surrounding a serious looking man sitting in a chair. The man asked, what do you want with my wife? My grandma scared out of her mind replied, I was talking with her earlier about today about tanning beds. And I found this article about how dangerous they might be. And I wanted to let her know the man was silent for a beat and then said, I very much appreciate you coming here to tell my wife this. Thank you. And then one of the suited men, I did it. That was amazing. Thank you so much. You brought

me there. Thank you. It was a little touch. Polly Walnuts. One of the suited men then took the article from my grandma, turned her around and nudged her out of the room. He then said, you saw nothing in this room. All right. She nodded confused and scared and ran off. When my grandpa found out what happened, he scolded her for not bringing him with her because of how dangerous the situation could have been. When he said, um, something along the lines of, don't you know, you should never talk to people. Long story short, my grandma stayed polite and did not get murdered. Love it. Thanks for reading my grandma's story. I wish I could have, I wish I could have written it the way she told me. Me too. God damn me too. I bet it was amazing. I wish I could have written

it the way she told it to me. Maybe when she visits this Christmas, I'll be able to get another story like this out of her. Yes. And record it. Okay. So here's the plan. This is from Kristen. It says, can't wait to see you in January. Much love from Las Vegas. Kristen, Kristen, record that. Email it to Steven to say it in the subject line. And if your grandma can tell a story, like we think she can. Yeah. Then she can have this podcast. Then she inherits the podcast, like Charlie Bucket did from Willy Wonka. That's right. As long as she does the tour correctly and doesn't eat snozzberries that tastes like snozzberries. And we fly away. Now, how long was this mini sewed? Nine days? Yeah. Like Hanukkah wasn't. Oh, it's better than Hanukkah is what

you're saying. Yes. I absolutely was trying to one up Hanukkah. Merry Christmas, everyone. Merry Christmas. Be good. Be good. Have a safe, happy, safe New Year's Eve. Please safe and say in this New Year's. Yes. Tell your stepfather we say hello. Tell Rick best condolences to him and his best condolences. The best of all condolences of the seasons. Yeah. And stay sexy. And don't get murdered. Whoa. You want to see Santa? Okay. Santa cookie.