My First Million - MFM Mini - The 5 Part Process to Networking Effectively

Episode Date: July 18, 2021

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All right, let's talk about networking. That is one of the most annoying buzzwords in the business world. Nobody wants to be a networker, or nobody I know at least, nobody I like wants to be a networker, right? When we think of networker, I see schmoozing, suit wearing, kind of like fake complimenting, business card handing out or, you know, loves to be at a conference and just, you know, believes that the only way to send an email is to shoot it your way, right? So nobody wants to be a networker.

But everybody wants a badass network. And you've probably heard the phrase, your network is your net worth. And it's not true, but there's some truth in it, like all cliches. And so, you know, I wanted to tell you about kind of the way I think about this stuff. And I used to have this thing. I half wrote a book like 10 years ago of all the things I had learned my first year doing a startup. And I never published it. Maybe I should someday.

these are it's turning now into i guess podcast like this or my newsletter uh go to shanpuri dot com you should be subscribing that's where i put out stories like this but anyhow the um the phrase i used was i said networking is like noah's arc right you know the the old fabled story of noah's arc so here's kind of how it's like noah's arc um you have the flood and uh i would say for most business most startup businesses um just assume the flood is coming right for a startup by default, you're going to fail. You have to like do something to get out of failure into success. And so the flood is coming and your network is your best chance of surviving because within your network, you're going to find knowledge, expertise, capital, strategy, different things that

you're going to need in order to survive. Okay, number two, build it before you need it. So you don't want to try to build your network when you need a network, right? If you want to fundraise, that's not the time to build your connections with investors. it's too late at that point. And it's very transparent. Exactly what you're doing is very transactional. So you don't build a real network. You don't build real relationships.

And so you want to be placing deposits into those bank accounts for months or years before you ever are trying to make a withdrawal. And so that's why build it before you need it. And you want to build it with the intention of it being mutually beneficial, right? You want to be depositing so that they have something in their account from you. You're giving before you're going to end up asking for something. Number three, keep it kosher. So, you know, in the store of Noah's Ark, God, you know, granted Noah and his followers

the right to kill some of the animals and eat their meat, but, you know, it had to be done in a certain way. And it's the same principle with your network. You want to use, but don't abuse your network. Everybody hates that guy who's just constantly asking and constantly using the network rather than it being a true, you know, friendship or sort of allyship where we'll help each other out. And we'll know where the line is where you're asking for too much. Okay, number four, you want two of everything. So what I do when I build a network, and this is, I've never heard

anyone else talk about this, but it's made common sense to me, and I think you should do it too, is you want to pair up every member in your network with another. So often when you're networking, you're going to people that are, let's say, more successful, more knowledgeable, more connected than you. That's very frequently the case. And so that creates the potential for kind of a one-way dynamic, right? And you've got to think, why would this person on the other side, if I know why I would want to be connected with them because they're smart and their experience and they have capital and they have connections, why do they want to connect with me?

Well, first, have some confidence. They want to connect with you because you're an interesting person doing interesting things, that you're fun to be around, that you're kind and you will help them, you know, without them even needing to ask. But the second thing is, when you're building a network, you don't want them all just to be connected to you. You want them to be connected to each other, right? So when I meet somebody and I have two people in my network, I race to introduce those two dots to each other, right? I want them to connect with each other.

And now I've added value to both of them just by connecting them with each other. So that's how you want two of everything, just like Noah had two of every animal on the ark. And by the way, I used to feel this weird sense of like, I don't know, I don't know, jealousy, because I would introduce two people that were in my network, and all of a sudden, they would become best friends, and they would do business together. And often they wouldn't even be including me in that stuff. And I used to think, oh, man, maybe I should, maybe I should be trying to keep everybody to myself. But obviously, that's a naive, short-sided way of thinking about it. It's a natural human reaction, but it's not the right response.

The right response is to say, hell yeah, I want all the people around me to be winning. and I have so much abundance in my life of success, of connections, of all this stuff. You know, I couldn't even use anymore. My cup is overflowing. And so if they're having a great time together, they're doing business together, fantastic. That's a win for me. Those are two people in my network who are winning because I was able to connect those dots. And the last piece.

Number five, do the work. Building the arc was a lot of work. And you've got to do the work yourself. You got to Google stalk everybody. You got to find common ground. You got to make time. If they like hiking, then you better lace them up and you better meet them on the trail at 6 a.m. Right.

Don't be lazy and don't suggest generic coffee meetings and that stuff. This is more like dating. It's courtship, right? You got to figure out what the other person's into. You've got to speak their language and you've got to help them out. And you're not doing it just to smooth with them, right? You're doing it because that's just the decent, friendly thing to do is to think about what the other person's interested in and try to meet them where they are. And so if you want to build a great network, you've got to do those five.

things. Let's recap them. Prepare for the flood. Number two, build it before you need it. Number three, keep it kosher. Don't, don't, you know, use, but don't abuse your network. Number four, get two of everything. Pair people in your network to each other. Everyone who you meet, you should introduce to another person in your network. And number five, do the work. Don't be lazy. And so, yeah, networking, it could be schmoozing if you're sort of talented list, if you're sort of talentless or callous about the way you go about it. but I think it's different. It's maximizing one of the most valuable resources around you, the people that are in your orbit. And it's a renewable resource. It's in your control. You're able to build it,

and it's sort of the gift that keeps on giving once you build it. So that's it. Noah's Arc for networking. If you like this little story, you should sign up for my newsletter. I put out stories like this once or twice a week, and I do a lot more of these written than I do in audio. So if you like this stuff, you should join. It's just my name, shanpuri.com, and go sign up. I think there's like 30,000 people on there now. We want to get that to 100 by the end of the year. All right, enjoy. Hey, my first million listeners, this is Steph again from Trends.co. Now, most of you probably know trends as the idea newsletter, because that's what we do. We send you business ideas weekly, and then we show you how to capitalize on them. But anyone that's run a business before

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