My Therapist Ghosted Me - Babies, Brows & A Bikini

Episode Date: April 8, 2022

As we move into spring, it's time to think about getting the bikinis out, but who's been gifted one this week?? Find out a bit about Vogue's Dad from the past, Ancient Greek death sentences and enjoy a supercut of Joanne doing her best to self-promote. If you'd like to get in touch, you can send an email to [e-mail] more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThank you!

Welcome to My Therapist Ghosted Me with me, comedian Joanne McNally and her fellow comedian Vogue. Vogue Williams. With me, comedian Joanne McNally and Brillo ambassador Doug Williams Joanne what have you been up to this week? I've actually been up to like a lot but nothing

at the same time so I had three days off work so I went down to the Nicebrook Hotel in Trim plugity plug plug plug where they put me in

the bridal suite and I I am currently in another bridal suite in the Killishy I've been in more bridal suites than I would say even you have Vogue

at this stage which is saying something that's not possible absolutely not possible that's what I was thinking but as I as I slipped into my 60th bridal suite

in a year I thought I think I've been in more suites than Vogue that's what I was thinking but as I as I slipped into my 60th bridal suite in a year I thought I think I've I think I've been in more leases than both that's insane that's good karma that means you're gonna get married

well basically I just sit in bridal suites on my own at night drinking wine and pressing no on men's faces online on date naps that's improductive

I actually had I had an experience in trim that I was gonna tell you about go on it was it was back in my modelling days that I was going to tell you about go on it was back in my modelling days and I went down and you used to go

and model for like little shops like down the country and I went down sorry when you say model for little shops down the country

listen Joanne it's a different kind of modelling okay do you mean wearing a sandwich board outside Gail's Cafe in Trim that would have been

way too highbrow for me yeah two cheap adders for the price of one. Why are we talking here? It was like a mother of the bride shop, right? And I went down and I was getting like a few pictures in their outfits. Well, this woman was getting her money's worth, whether it killed her. And she had me in, I counted 73 things that day. Listen, that wasn't the problem.

I didn't mind that so much. It was every time she put me in something new she patted my whole body down and by the end of the 73 I was like

I just felt so dirty I was like I don't really know what's happened folks is this another one of those times where you go on the pod and admit to being low level molested

and me and Jo don't know what to say that felt a bit like the time that masseuse touched your flap and you were like those times where you go on the pod and admit to being low-level molested and me and Jo don't know what to say. That felt a bit... Like the time that Miss Seuss touched your flap and you were like... And me and Jo had to stop

and call your parents and be like, Vogue just told us she's been low-level molested in a massage parlor. Honestly, this one though... And we don't know where to look.

I felt so dirty after it. I was like, I hope no one ever touches me again. So yeah, I was patted down 73 times in trim. And I don't mind after it. I was like, I hope no one ever touches me again. So yeah, I was patted down 73 times in trim. And I don't mind saying it because that woman probably isn't alive.

She was quite old at the time. Folk, you need to go to the guards. Like there's a time and a place for stories like this and it's not the podcast. A lovely day was had by her, not me. I went on a baby moon.

Go on. So a baby moon is essentially like, it's a made up thing, but I liked getting involved in it. So me and Sven went down the country, Soho farmhouse for two days and just did like nothing. Ate so much food until we felt sick. Then we'd go and like, we went to the gym once. We like went on our bikes. until we felt sick then we'd go and like we went to the gym once we like went on our bikes kind of did nothing

when you say did nothing like did you when is that like a Vogue did nothing or a Joanne did nothing did you launch a business

and get pregnant again I wouldn't say it was a Joanne did nothing I had like two hours of work every day I kind of it was a Vogue did nothing but I had a great time and honestly like I love

my kids I do but like wow it felt like I'd gone back in time pre-kids and I just had so much free time and no one was asking me for stuff it was great it's really good I'm gonna do that more yeah I'll never forget I don't know if I've said this on the pod before I'll never forget like because I understand like because obviously I've got a lot of friends know if I've said this on the pod before I'll never forget like because I understand like because obviously I've got a lot of friends and kids I do

I do have a sense of how relentless it is and how hard it is but sometimes you see them you just see people just like kind of snapping at their kids

one of the funniest things you've ever said and it was completely unintentional was when I was down in your house one day and Vogue was getting

like irritated because obviously she's the kids hanging out for the whole time and Gigi wanted something and Vogue was like ugh

she just always wants everything brought to her and at the time I was like Vogue she can't walk like she was literally like a fetus

in a high chair and Vogue's bullying because Vogue has to like instead of just firing at the grape in the folk had to like instead of just firing at the grape in her head had to like literally

get off her stool and hand her the grape and I say that with I have a lot of respect for your mothering skills as you know but I was like it must be so irritating

to be just at someone's beck and call all the time like I all the time I can't imagine Jo what's it like that's what like

we're pulled out of Jo all the time we're like his children I know I don't know how you put up with this Jo do that's what like we're pulled out of Joe all the time we're like his children I know I don't know how you put up with this Joe do you know what as well it reminds me of when

you were younger because like now I get it now but like I don't hear them all and I can see why like your mom would have that glazed look over her eyes because it's like mama

mama mama mama and you're like it just kind of turns into like a rhythmic thing that you just don't really hear

I remember going for lunch at one of the girls' ones and she brought the baby and the baby screamed the whole time but my friend was obviously just determined

to have a day out so we just pretended it wasn't happening people were moving tables like it was hell it was like it was Guantanamo Bay shit

it was just this constant screeching of a terror like I don't know what the child the child was being fed nuggets and chips I don't know what the child, the child is being fed nuggets and chips. I don't know what his fucking problem was. They're just, they're greedy and selfish.

They're greedy and selfish. Joanne, oh my God, I've got bad news for you. I wasn't going to say it. I was just going to turn up. Right? Oh God. You're coming to a show. Joanne's actually the first, oh, I'm definitely going to a show Joanne's actually Oh I'm definitely

Coming to a show I'm actually changing my flight To make sure I can go To one of your shows over here No It's a different thing It's much worse than that So

Joanne's actually been Really organised And she's organised A day out I've got to bring the baby I have to bring the baby For half the day The new one

He won't be You won't even hear him I have to I flagged this with you I flagged this and you told me this wasn't going to happen I'm not

I'm not being bad like bring the baby bring him if he wants to come let him come but just let him know he's paying for himself like

I'm not if the bill's getting split it's getting split equally that child is paying for itself it's literally you can have me for less time or you can have me for the full time and I'm going to get Spenny to come and pick him up

after about four or five hours. I'll have done two feeds with him then and then he can go and he'll go and I'll pump and dump the rest just for you. Can you not just pump yourself like a tyre before you leave the house? No, he's too little. Listen, you're getting me out

two weeks after having a baby do you know how lucky you are not even two weeks it won't even be two weeks I'm sure he's sound the baby and yeah and he's meant to be your godchild

I know you don't like him because he's a boy but remember that he's your godchild Jo did I tell you that I was getting do you know the way like Vogue always gets

trialled in papers in Ireland? Which we think they're doing it on purpose. They'll take something completely vacuous that she's said and make out like she's rung them

to drop the news. Yeah. Like the orange sofa. Yeah, Vogue unveils toilet brush and it's like, it's like she's, it's like she's rung up

the paper and being like, guys, have you heard? Like she's like, look look if you run this story I'll do something for you like as if and then they show it's just

anyway some people get really worked up online it's like the Daily Mail so they get like traction because people just love hating on people telling vacuous stories

anyway so obviously we all get a great laugh out of O getting trailed wow wow wow my time has come oh dear yes yes anyway so obviously we all get a great laugh out of O getting trailed well well well my time has come oh dear yes yes

and it was because of her child so I did an interview with Suzanne Cain in 98 saying that I was slightly disappointed

when I was told I was having a boy and let it be said did I not tell you this last week I think I did you didn't

and eh obviously now look bearing in mind like firstly as we I've always say

I love men too much actually too much joke okay and but also I would like

a baby like I've I've one godchild I've two nephews one of them is my godchild. I adore them both. They're absolutely gorgeous and adorable. Can I put them in a tutu?

No, I cannot put them in a tutu. You could. No, they're not into it. Get this one young, you never know. Can I put them in little leopard print jumpsuits and little crowns? No, I cannot. Basically, I want a drag baby.

So when folk tell me I was having a boy, No, I cannot. Basically, I want a drag baby. So when folk tell me I was having a boy, yes, I was slightly disappointed. Not because... Gender disappointment is a thing, Joanne. It's okay. Yeah.

Like when I see those gender reveal parties and the blue powder pops out and the girls screaming and all, I'm like, has she seen what's going on there? Has she? I don't think she's looked

at the powder properly. Basically then, of course, they ran with the headline saying, Joanne, disappointed, Vogue's having at the powder properly basically then of course they ran with the headline saying Joanne disappointed Vogue's having a boy and then of course I looked like yeah so I look like I hated men so I had to then

do a public apology which of course thrilled me no end very on brand I've got Stockholm Syndrome I'm constantly trying to ride my captors Do you know where I sweat loads which is gross like right under my bum but not on my finula

do you get me so I was in with my doctor today go on and to a to a face doctor are we finally admitting to that or gynecological doctor the face gynecological

gynecological I was in the gynecological but I've actually got a story for both because four days after I I will hopefully will be my due date I am going in to get my face

attacked it's day one of attack the face I'm going to leave my baby for a couple of hours I'm going to go in I'm getting a micro needling and it's a special thing that they shove like lasers into get the old face back

Bear Grylls for the face Bear by Vogue does back. Bear Grylls for the face. Bear by Vogue does her face. Bear Grylls for the face. And come here. What do you think of my brows? I was like, I'm so glad you brought them up because I really didn't know

what to do. We didn't know. We were like, do we say something? Does she know they're there? I think they look so gorgeous. They're just, they're,

they've grown back. They're assaulting to look at. they're just they're they've grown back they're assaulting to look at they're not assaulting I might have gone a bit dark on the tint they're just do you know what one of the best things about you

is your brows actually thank you Joanne not these ones though I just want no because they're just I haven't seen your face in a while I think it looks good Spenny turned around to me

saying he was like what have you done to your face you look amazing and I was like he was like what have you done to your face you look amazing and I was like he was like no seriously you look gorgeous what's that about

and I was like oh that's so cute first of all fuck you that's not cute what's that all about and then and then I was like

it's because I've had my brows done if you want to have like a little lift a Botox kind of lift without Botox get your brows done I think they're just quite a costume because it's the first day and you were brushing them when we your brows done I think they're just quite a costume

because it's the first day and you're brushing them when we opened the zoom and they like there was quite a lot there to brush I'm brushing them up yeah I do I need I need a proper comb for them but come here back to back to how to avoid future gender um disappointment I was in with my doctor and I said I don't want to have four kids but like if it was definitely able to have a girl I would I would consider it and then um and then she goes that basically if you have sex right and you do it like five days before your actual date of ovulation then don't have sex again it's more inclined to be girl sperm because the girl sperm lasts for five days but the male sperm is so fast that like if you have sex on ovulation day it goes and it beats the female sperm and gets up there first

that interesting and it was my doctor actually he said that so maybe it's not bullshit no that's that explains that's why men move on so fast as well it's all the same but it actually makes sense like in later life we survive like longer than men speak so i was reading about these things called the darwin awards joe have you heard about these for the most stupid death i.e like you're clearing the gene pool you know what i mean like i mean obviously you know it's like the razzies for dead people i guess it's so cruel it's so cruel why was a mom or i might like touch wood imagine your mom died and it's so cruel it's so cruel why was a mom or

like touch wood imagine your mom dying and it's just like here look how stupid this woman is I know well interesting you say that though because I was reading

through them today and what we're talking about like men like kind of rushing forward and doing whatever I so far what I've read

there's not a single not one woman has won a Darwin award which you could I mean if I you know if you were if one woman has won a Darwin Award, which you could. I mean, if you woke up a different side of the bed, you'd have a girl with them for sexism. You're like, where's the representation, guys? Where's the diversity? But actually, just men are out there doing stupid shit, electrocuting themselves and

fucking trying to charge their jet skis while in the water and all, like just doing stupid shit, yeah? Yeah, I kind of believe that. But like, I obviously have a boy and a girl and like theodore is quite clever he is a clever boy but she she is like she's got all these words she's potty trained at 18 months like it's insane girls are quicker than boys okay joe that's fine girls win girls win in most the sense but then we have to have periods pregnancy and menopause

which is not really that fair that we got lumped with all three do you know that women perform like girls perform better in all female schools than they do in mixed schools

I had this heated debate with this guy once and I was like no no no no I have the facts I studied it in college because I was there for 20 years

so some shit actually stuck in my head doing my third arts degree I'm basically an artiste now I'm the Picasso of social sciences anyway

that girls perform better in all female schools because in mixed schools when they're young they're worried that looking smart will make it's not attractive

it's not sexy to look smart so they don't study and they don't answer questions and stuff whereas men

or sorry I said poor them boys really excel because to them it is cool to look intelligent whereas with girls

it's not if I have a daughter she won't even make eye contact with a lad until she's in her late 60s at least no way

absolutely disgusting the second Gigi starts getting good looking, I'm taking her out of that house in Battersea. Taking her off to a convent. Gigi actually, do you know what? Jesus. She got gifted. She got a present this week, Gigi Bear,

of a bikini. But not like, not like, I don't even know what a cute bikini is for like an under two year old. It was like a triangle bikini. And then the bottoms had tie sides. I'm like, and it's just like dark grey.

It's like something, it's like something I would wear. I was like, I am not putting my kid walking around the beach in a bikini with tie sides and triangle for the boob bits. I just don't know. Me and Vogue talked the boob bits. I just don't know. Me and Vogue talked about this, Jo. I just don't know how I feel about it. I don't know where I stand on it. Firstly, I know as a kid, I liked mimicking adults.

So like I would smoke biros and wear high heels and stuff. Now, turning your child into a tiny sex worker is obviously a different thing, but I know the babies will try and mimic. You know what I mean? But also, I think it's kind of problematic because it's suggesting that a baby's nipples should be covered yeah I don't want to see a baby with like tan lines on it you know what I mean like it's anywhere other than like it's little fat legs basically

it's a little it's just a little bit weird I think and I remember like I used to go around in like bikini bottoms I remember the day that I thought shite I wish I had a bikini top I was on the beach in Portugal was this in the Maldives

at Christmas on the beach in Portugal and I was in the sea you just came through what do they call it when your tits come in oh you're coming in yeah you're coming on

you know you know when your nipples go all hard no I've literally you don't remember that happening see it happened to Amber first and she was like what do they call it when your tits come in oh you're coming in yeah you're coming on you know you know when your nipples go all hard no I've literally you don't remember that happening see it happened to Amber first and she's like

mum I'm dying I'm sick and it was just because her boobs had started but like it starts in the nips so the nips get really hard and like me and Amber

didn't have boobs for years to be fair so I thought it happened to her first but anyway I was on the beach and then Shane Lynn O'Hanlon

who was our friend her brother came down the beach and then Shane Lynn O'Hanlon who was our friend her brother came down the beach and I remember staying in the sea for like an hour and a half being like I cannot get out of the sea because I've got no bikini top so that's when I think around 12 give a give a gal a bikini top there's some stuff that just even 12 I'd there's some stuff like look it's only a baby bikini if some people would see it as fun. It's not like they sent you like a baby thong

or like lingerie. Do you know what I mean? It is just kind of mimicking. She's loads of that shit anyway. She doesn't need it. It's so weird. Do you know what though? It's something just like, imagine Gigi in a little wraparound dress. there's stuff

that just look like imagine imagine Gigi in a little wraparound dress there's just stuff that looks weird on kids

and a bikini would look also I have to say and this is controversial Jo I don't know if it's going to stay in

it kind of depends on how hot your kid is I'm sorry it does do you know all these people are like

are you taking a photo of my child you're like get over it your child is not hot like it's got a mountain behind it that's way more attractive that's what I'm actually

taking a photo of you need to calm the fuck down oh no I hope my new baby doesn't have the same head that Theodore came out with because you'll all judge him on our big day out

I'll go to drop him home and in the half an hour I leave you'll all abuse him on our big day out. I'll go to drop him home and in the half an hour I leave you'll all abuse him. Well, if Gigi ends up wearing that bikini I'm buying the new baby a pair of chaps. Oh God.

I just find it really weird. I mean, you can give babies something but like, that's just for me, a bit unacceptable. But it's like, you know they say, what do you get the person who has everything? What do you get the person who has everything? What do you get the baby who has everything?

A bikini. It's the one thing she's guaranteed to not have. She definitely does not have a bikini. It's her first ever bikini. Another thing. I'll tell you this much, Vogue. I'll tell you this much. She doesn't have the body first.

Let's be real. Here, another thing that annoys me about people with babies i got this on theater not so much on gg can people stop mailing me telling me that my life is going to be hell when the third baby arrives because having three kids is like the worst thing that's ever going to happen to you i'm quite excited about having three kids So keep your opinions up your own arsehole. You don't have three kids. People just constantly just are like, mainly me being like, oh, it's going to be really hard.

Your life will never be the same. Now you've had three. You should have had two. You should have stuck with two. I'm like, oh my, well, it's far too late, first of all. And second of all, maybe I'm going to enjoy the madness. You know? No, don't mind them.

People, they kind of feel like that's because that's because some people find themselves in a position they're struggling a little bit I met a woman in the spa

in Trim we were chatting she's four kids and yes did she regret her decisions absolutely but would she do things differently yes I think she would

actually that was the vibe I got she was like yeah she was like she was like a fugitive vibe I got yeah she was like she was like a fugitive down in that spa it was like she was on the run from her kids I always laugh at like this girl called Louisa Zisman and uh and like when I had Theodore she was like no stop stop just just have the one child and I was like Lisa I'm not having just one child and then I got pregnant with Gigi and she's like no no really, two isn't, honestly,

don't go past two. Look at you now. Stubborn as a mule. Stubborn as a mule. I can't concentrate, because I'm in the middle of trying to Google baby magic mic outfits

for the new baby so that when he comes, he'll be ready for whatever brothel you're running at that gaff. So I was swinging out of the Knightsbrook Hotel on my own

just like hanging out in the bar mingling and the owner of the hotel a man named Peter very nice man I chatted to him a bit and he comes over

and he's like are you a friend of Vogue Williams? I was like here we fucking go yeah sorry she's not here sorry about that

anyway won't you skip a few turns out he was really good friends with your dad I don't know but that's Ireland Ireland is very small

everyone knows but he was like Freddie Williams he was a real goer in his day he was like he was a man about time and I was like

go on Peter give us the g was like, he was a man about time. I was like, go on, Peter, give us the goss. What was he up to? Joanne, you and my dad would have had a great laugh together. My God. He was like,

I think we would have. Do you know what? It was his 80th birthday the other day. 80th. Why didn't he invite me? I think we'd have good chemistry. He was never, he was never going to make it to 80. Jesus. I think we'd have good chemistry he was never

he was never going to make it to 80 Jesus I remember we used to go into him in hospital and he'd be swinging

out the window in the bathroom smoking and we'd be like like you've just had two heart attacks you cannot do that yeah well anyway

Peter was telling me he was a live fast die young kind of man he made him sound incredibly sexy the more he was talking about your dad I was considering I was like I'd have a little fast die young kind of man he made him sound incredibly sexy the more he was talking about your dad I was considering

I was like I'd have a little paw on myself now going up to that this man needs to be resuscitated immediately please he sounded very sexy

I'll send you a picture of him for later right please do please do please do sorry what else did you get up to this week oh so I

I did a lot of like sauna-ing steam room-ing that kind of vibe mum came down to join me I was in the bridal suite

she was in the kind of groom suite whatever and we had a ball and we were treated like kings down in the bridal suite she was in the kind of groom suite whatever and we had a ball and we were treated like kings down in the night it was lovely

but I woke up one morning I was a bit hungover and I was like I'll go down to the steam room and the sauna and sweat it out

because I'd heard that saying sweat it out without putting I should know at this stage that I've had enough hangovers

to know that hangovers are dehydration putting yourself in a position where you basically water yourself like where you basically dry yourself out

and turn your body into a thirst trap is an absolute it's a nightmare like that anyway then I went in I went down and saw

in a steam room of hell and they've had loads of deaths from people going in drunk and just like dying in there. People bringing in drink, dying from dehydration, going in hungover, dying. I can't bear it.

I think like I actually, I walk in and I feel like I'm going to pass out. Do you know what's so funny, right? I went into the, one of them I don't know, steam room. I went in,

there's this little steam room. Obviously I'm in my bikini. There's a man in there in his Speedos. It's a small room. I was like, right, I can't know steam room I went in there's this little steam room obviously I'm in my bikini there's a man in there in his speedos it's a small room I was like right I can't just turn around and walk out now

like that would be really rude I have to sit down anyway he starts the chat and do you know when you know I'm not a bit of

I can't kind of bat this away he just keeps coming back about the weather and the local and the village and blah blah so I was like right

you just lean in now there's no way of getting around it or else you're an asshole. Anyway, we had a great chat. He's got heart disease. We were talking about his job. He's trying to get back into the dating scene. He was an elder man. But I was thinking, it's so interesting.

If I'd been at a dinner table in my brown knickers and he'd be in his jocks, it would have just been completely inappropriate what we were doing because what we were wearing was waterproof in a dark room it was like it's like I've always thought that about bikinis and stuff like if you're walking around Joe if I was in a bikini now you probably wouldn't think that much of it but if I sat down obviously if there was water inside or else it would be a bit weird but like if I sat down in my brand knickers you'd be like what's going on there there's just a dip I don't know is it that it's like you just put something in a different it's all the context of it just changes it completely anyway so basically I sat there half naked speaking to this man half naked it'd be a great chat about half an hour you lasted half

an hour in there yeah we were chatting for ages jeez that'd be an awful death that'd be a terrible death I know imagine I literally was imagine getting steamed to death like a dumpling

I was like I'm gonna come out I wouldn't even be able to have a proper funeral my way could just be like me and my I'd be dipped in I'd be glazed in soy sauce interesting though

to die in a sauna interesting how did your dad die in a sauna a sauna accident I know yeah it's kind of I mean

there's worse ways to go like you'd be you'd look great at your bare like you'd look great at the weight because you'd be glowing like the dewiness

of the skin your skin would be really dewy yeah you would be great you would be great yeah one of my favourite parts

of the pod is when Joanne McNally tries to sell herself so just for you and for me here you go my UK tour is on sale and

there's I'm going loads of places like do you want to send me and I'll do it for you like in a nice way no my UK tour went on sale

and I'm just oh my god hold on stop stop I'm just... Oh my God, hold on. Stop. Stop it, Jo. Just give me a second, please. Sorry, Vogue, I have it. My UK tour is on sale.

I'm going to... I'm going everywhere. I'm going to places like Bath, Nottingham, Southend, Telford, Yeovil, Brighton Dome, Leeds, Corn... My UK tour is now on sale.

I'm going all over the place, including places like Bath, Nottingham, Southend, Telford, Yeovil, Brighton Dome, Leeds, Corn Exchange. I also have a fresh Killarney Arena date going on sale.

Killarney Arena tour going on... Tomorrow. And there's still tickets for the SSE Arena in Belfast. Don't come, it's too embarrassing. Don't come, it's too embarrassing. So we all know how good at it I fucked it myself

sorry see it's not easy is it see do you know what sorry something just popped up on my Instagram

Spenny is such a there's this Vogue Williams is considering moving back to Ireland with her family and this is what Spencer says who doesn't love Ireland and I'm not just saying that

because I happen to be in the studio said Spencer in Ireland AM that's exactly why he said that by the way we've got to place up the hill in Hoth which is absolutely beautiful we come when we can we come when I say we're going we're never gonna we're never gonna

we're never gonna close the door on that possibility but you're not really opening it either Spencer be real with Arlene I'm like Spencer do you want to come to

Hoth for the weekend oh I didn't know darling okay we're going to Hoth this weekend aye aye say what needs to be said listen we all do it

I was looking up worse deaths yeah because you know I have a lot of time on my own there was one that really stuck with me

it was called the brazen bull so basically back in ancient Greece as a means of executing criminals they built this guy designed

this big bull this big kind of gold bull or they'd hollow it out the steel bull and then they'd put the prisoner the convict in it

and then they would set fire to underneath the bull so he would the condemned were locked inside the device and a fire was set under it heating the metal until the person inside was roasted to death but the brazen bull

was designed in the form and size of an actual bull and had an acoustic apparatus that converted screams into the sound of a bull oh my god the Greeks were terrible for killing people like in weird ways They were wankers They were awful

God Absolute wankers Ancient wankers That's a terrible way to die Yeah So The head of the bull Was designed with a system

Of chews and stops That the prisoners screams Were converted into sounds Like the bellowing Of an infuriated bull And according to legend When the bull was reopened After her body was charred

The victim's scorched bones then shone like jewels were made into bracelets which I think is you know. At least nothing goes to waste. I know if you're gonna

if you're gonna die do it in a nice fancy collab. You know I have to I have to look at the time now to make sure that this won't affect my nightmares.

Anyway your man who invented it ended up getting put in it but people would rent it for parties not knowing what was going on like Like they didn't know. It was like this weird kind of sinister, like kind of underground dark scene. And they'd kill someone without them knowing.

And they just, it would just sound like this really nice ball sound. Like, ooh. And actually someone was roasting to death. I know. Like, I mean, people think, people give out about life now. Tell us the most stupid death. Let's see who's won the... The number one is a ski resort sledge thief.

After having a few beers one evening, they decided to steal a protective mat that covered the metal barriers at the bottom of the slope and use it as a sledge. They hiked up the hill, hurled themselves down and promptly slammed

straight into the very same barrier they'd stolen the protective matting from. Died on the spot, earning himself a Darwin Award in the process like imagine like death isn't embarrassing enough

do you know what I mean oh no it's embarrassing it's embarrassing to die you know you've let shit get the better of you basically and then to have this

added insult that you're for a Darwin Award I'm really sorry Joanna's died I know it's so embarrassing for her I know yeah Scarlett does she know does she know does she know she's so embarrassing for her I know yeah Scarlett

does she know does she know does she know she's made an absolute fucking show of herself she'll never live this down

go on thank you everybody for listening and please keep remembering sending your emails into mtgmpod mtgmpod

what is it? Oh my god! I have got fucking news for you on the bonus app. What? I have got fucking news for you on the bonus app. What?