My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "He FORGOT he was in a relationship..."

Episode Date: November 29, 2023

Recorded just before MTGM took to the stage at the SSE in Belfast, Vogue & Joanne are back into the email inbox to find out what you've all been up to!If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [e-mail] review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.com/For more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

This is a Global Player Original Podcast. SSE in Belfast about to start our first ever arena show. I know. Which is very exciting. I know. I did the SSE but they they didn't use all the chairs or all the doors or even all the bars.

But anyway we're at full capacity today which is very exciting. Joanne I would say the chairs are overrated. Okay. I would say that mine was more

intimate the last time whereas this is what's the opposite of intimate? Not intimate. Unintimate. Unintimate. All right, the source, calm down. You know, when you say a word wrong, I was in like an important meeting the other day and I was like, I don't want my professionality being questioned. I'm like, no, no.

What the fuck is professionality? I was on, I was filming a TV show and they said, I took, and I said, appendage. And they were like, sorry, it was appendage.

Why? I don't know why I put this like exotic slant on it. Appendage. Was that when you'd come back from Tenerife? Maybe you were just, you had the accent.

Yeah, look, what can I say? There's a bilingual in there somewhere. Professionality, Christ. Anyway. Anyway. It's very exciting. Oh, did you mispronounce something else the other day?

Okay, what else did I mispronounce? I can't remember, but it was funny. It happens quite often. There's a lot of words in the world. There's a lot of words. Too many words, actually, Vogue. And also. Agree.

Because I'm not in school anymore, I find my spelling is kind of slipping a bit. Oh, you can't take the spelling away from me. I honestly think that I should have been in spelling bees. Oh. Yeah, I'm a fantastic speller. Spelling bees. Oh, yeah.

You know that I was in a spelling bee. Oh, were you? Yeah. What spelling bee were you in? It doesn't matter. You were there. You were in the lower level ones. I was probably at the maths competition that day.

I would, I honestly, I've never been in a spelling bee but I always was I always had kind of a I had an instinct around spelling but there's certain words that to this day I can't spell just jewelry so you'll always I'll always say jewels even in my posts I'll always say jewels yeah I cannot get jewelry jewelry jewelry spaghetti was always a difficult one for me I can get spaghetti Easy peasy for me Disappointment Embarrassing and disappear Which are three things I do regularly

I really need to know How to spell them Grateful Grateful is always A tough one for me Are they two separate words Because that's what my phone says I've often had a desert

After dinner Oh I love deserts So they're delicious Yeah So Yeah broccoli is a hard one Is it because there's The two C's

And you weren't anyway it doesn't matter that was an interesting start anyway we're here yeah we're here we're here at the three the SSC arena

and we're very excited we have had we have to give a shout out to Eamon McGill he has created amazing stage outfits for us and when I say

we gave him absolutely no help at all I would say we actually made it more difficult for him well Vogue had an idea that we would have because we do have stage outfits but now that we're in kind of bigger rooms we felt like we wanted something a bit next level a bit extra yeah so I was like I think we should ask him to design costumes for us and in fairness I had I

didn't even I think I told him my shoe size 24 hours ago I had no contact with him whatsoever I don't know how he did it I don't know how he did it I don't know how he did it Like he is Like and he only did it today He did them today And they're literally perfect They're ready to go

Fair play to him I love that little bit of talent Like I don't have like a talent like that you know I do have a talent Like what one? Which one? Having kids Oh thank you very much

My vagina is very talented Yeah well you don't get Thank you You do because you spit at kids And you have no stitches. I think that's a talent. Thank you very much. It's actually down to the epinoe, if anyone was wondering. I got this thing called an epinoe. Very embarrassing to use at the time, but I think it saved my vagina. I just thought you had a particularly slippery canal. No, not a slippery canal, actually. And not a large vagina, which people would think. And Theodore did have a large head, so you would assume very large vagina. It was the slippery canal actually and not a large vagina which people would think and Theodore did have a large head so you would assume very large vagina. It was the epi now.

Every time a woman sees a child with a large head they look at the mother and go are you okay hon? Only since see when I had Theodore he got sucked out of me so he actually had a double head.

Yeah. And my mum rang and was like we'd sent a picture of him and she couldn't sleep for the rest of the night because she thought something had happened to him.

She's like oh my god twins. She was like what happened to him? Is he okay? Only one of them has a picture of him and she couldn't sleep for the rest of the night because she thought something had happened to him. She's like, oh my God, twins. She was like, what happened to him? Is he okay? Only one of them has a set of eyes. What's happened to him? Took weeks to go down. I was just trying to hide it with hats and stuff. Yeah. Like what happened to his head? Well, the heads when they're born, they're very malleable, aren't they? Well, yeah, but I think that a baby is born via C-section and always be like, oh my God, your baby's head is amazing.

who's born via c-section you'll always be like oh my god your baby's head is amazing a friend of mine works in beds and obviously speaking of age she was like

I'll get you I'll sort you a bed for your new flat and I was like oh Sam thanks a million anyway she sends me she goes

I'm after getting you a bed it's fab oh my god you're gonna love it and I was like oh my god thanks she goes it's kind of like a motion bed like you kind of like there's a remote and it kind of

sits you up and kind of raise your feet I opened the link I was like that is a geriatric bed that is a hospital that is for when someone isn't ready to go to hospital yet it's a hospital bed in the house it's a deathbed I just I kind of think is it someone else's bed it's for deathbed it's a new no it's a new deathbed but i would take the new it's it's it looks like a gurney yeah but you for someone who takes the bed from time to time it might be nice not to have to lift your head and just go i think the least i can do is lift my own head at this age because there will be a time where i when i won't be able to and i'm like, I wish I hadn't wasted all the time not lifting my own head. I think that would be time saved.

Imagine some single woman had that bed and she brings the lap back. Both sides operate independently. So I could just motorize myself forward while your man is still asleep or whatever. I just said, I said, where's the oxygen tank with it?

Like, come on. I I said I'm not taking that as a woman who loves a bargain or a nice treat like that those beds are not cheap send me her details immediately it's just a padded coffin for free just lay out in it every night I know listen I did think about it but I said I just think i think it's too early for a motion hospital bed in life even if it is a very generous gift give us two weeks you want to have that bed in her house and she'll have one of those little things that goes up the stairs with a remote control just a seat yeah just give me a stair lift why not throw why not put up a couple of handles in the shower while you're at it oh you're on seat level you're on seat level of handles in the shower while you're at it. Oh, you're on seat level. You're on seat level.

A sofa in the shower. Oh God. But do honestly give me her details. No, of course. So Black Friday is here, whatever we didn't, it's an American thing,

but it's here now. But I was saying to Vogue, I was like, I want really good deals. Like I want, I don't want like frat. I don't, yeah,

I don't want 20% off a box of rollers. I want shit that I want it was like I want something designer for like 10 quid that's what I want ultimately I want like a huge saving I want it I want it I want it to keep me awake at night from the from the adrenaline rush of the save where are those sales I know but this is the thing even I've learned as a woman who loves a discount again i've said it uh black friday unless you're looking for something on black friday don't buy it don't buy it just it's just a ploy are they tricking us they're tricking us as long as they're just taking out old stock no it's not oh look 20 over tomagotchi you're like oh my god i have to have it they're not it's not old stock it's not crap it's actually

like if you want something but i feel like you can overbuy with shit like that particularly someone like me i kind of have to avoid it saying that i did buy three pairs of pajamas today on the black friday sale because i just i need some kind of fix yeah because i said like i want a really good sale i want a really good and she was like buy your mom pair of pajamas i was like i'll fucking buy my mom anything i said said, I want it for myself. I want a really good discount. I want like a discount that you kind of go blind and you're like, and all your blood rushes

from the thrill of it. Go into one of those secondhand designer shops if you want something like that. Now you're not going to get anything for a tenner, but like you'll get a good deal. I'd love a bed that isn't for a geriatric bed. Can I get a sale on a bed? This is the perfect time for you to buy shit like that

or buy a TV. When I was buying TVs for my new house, I did it in Black Friday and I got them for like half price. That was exciting. Do I need a washing machine? I don't know. But are they old scale? Like is it new telly? No, it's a new telly. They're not just finding shit in the ground. In the back.

We're like a hanger on the roof and all. You're like 50% off. You have to tune in. The telly text is very clear on this You do Do you know That's what I need to do You need a TV and stuff

For your new place in London Yeah That's what I need to do I just don't want to be tricked I think you're going to be You are the perfect person to trick I'll end up buying like a clothes horse For full price

That'll be it What a waste I'll be up all night like stressed out you need a hoover you need a hoover I have a Dyson you can't fucking better

you can't get better than that I do like a Miele a Miele I think you mean they're called Miele because I worked with them years ago but I remember it's the one thing

I kept from my first marriage was the hoover I said I'm not going to have a hoover I still have it it's an oath they I kept from my first marriage was the Hoover I said I'm not going to go to the Hoover I still have it it's in Hope they last years they lasted longer

than my marriage I know one of the girls left her husband before and she left the house because she wanted to leave and the only thing she was raging about

was the fact that she couldn't take the Dyson with her because it was it's in one of those things where it's it's kind of nailed to the wall yeah

that was the only thing that upset her she's like I didn't get to take the Dyson that would be heartbreaking in fairness I was like she left the kids everything

just it was the Dyson she was like I was like but the children aren't nailed to the wall you can take them but you're just focusing on the Dyson

the Dyson the kids can like eat up the dust and stuff they're great to have around girls help I know this is a safe space and we don't kink shame

oh I can't wait for this so please don't take this in that way I've been with my boyfriend for about six months and things are still honeymoon fresh he's kind to me

we still have great sex and we're still on to pretending that we never, ever use the toilet for more than a wee. Ah, yeah, that's cute. That's the real start stage, isn't it? I know, but I find that stage really like stressful for me. Yeah. And when I met Spenny, he only had a bathroom and it wasn't great. My new bedroom is going to have a commode apparently.

It is, it wasn't great. My new bedroom's going to have a commode apparently, so I'll be like riding. There'll be nothing in when I just remote control myself up and then get hoisted onto the commode in front of everyone in the room because apparently I'm just too old now to have things like dignity.

Staring everyone in the eyes in the sitting room. I come out. Someone give me a prune. There's nothing happening here. So good. Okay.

But back to the sex part. I thought we were having great sex but apparently he doesn't oh he told me the other night

that he liked it he said to me last night he goes you really got the rhythm there didn't you you're like oh my god

what do I not usually get the rhythm what are you saying I just took the compliment he's like okay thank you he told me the other night that he'd like to try some

different things which i'm totally up for he talked a bit about dressing up and that which i was here for but then he carried on he mentioned anal and look we've all had to have that conversation but then he carried on more and talked about some properly strong domination stuff that i really wouldn't be into it felt like a two-way conversation so I told him this and he basically sucked. Told me I didn't want to do it because I was scared and then left. It was a Friday

night and we planned to go out but that didn't happen. I feel really deflated because we had such a good thing up until now. I just feel like he didn't want me to be honest but there's no way I'm doing something that I'm not happy with. We've not spoken for a few days now and I'm thinking surely this can't be it. Oh, Jesus.

Just because I said I didn't want him choking me while we have sex. What the fuck? Anyway, do I call him and apologize or hold out? No. So let's look at this in a level way. He has a sexual need that is not being met. She doesn't want to meet that need.

So yeah, I think it's over. I know that sounds really, but like if she's not up for it and he's like, well, this is what I need. You need to find someone who matches with you. I don't think it's a complete no, but I think the way he's going on about it is absolutely pathetic because like,

he's probably a bit embarrassed as well. It's like, I put myself out there. I've asked for something and you've said no and it's like where do you go from here now bit of choking bit of choking a bit of choking i think that like i like i just like so some people are really into it i know some people do it to themselves and then they kill themselves yeah like your man from that band michael hutchinson yeah like just yeah I don't know asphyxiation sexual asphyxiation like I mean there's

there's other things to explore before you have to go into choking like can you not just like like wear a blindfold or like do a bit of tying up I know like tickle me with a feather I wouldn't like that man

no I wouldn't like that either oh god no I was thinking of the French maid with the duster I don't know like my sexual references are pretty dated at this stage yeah yeah I don't know no I sexual references are pretty dated at this stage yeah

I don't know no I don't think I wouldn't contact dress up as a tally tubby I think I think you're right I think that he's embarrassed I think he's embarrassed

he's embarrassed I think that like I don't know because you there is a bit of like he's probably you know he probably feels like

a bit of a weirdo yeah maybe maybe he's not being an arsehole but I also don't think that he should be like ghosting her because she said she didn't want to be choked during sex i feel i can feel a lot of shame here on both sides shame shame shame yeah but like maybe he just needs to be see this is why a lot of people cheat because they're not getting what they need

in the relationship they're in so they're like well. Well I'll go and get that. Kink met over here. And then we'll just. Do the regular stuff. So at least he's. At least he's trying to involve her. I know. I just don't like them being forced into doing something. No.

Well in fairness to you. She's not. No. So good for her. And keep standing your ground. Good for him asking. And good for her. Saying no.

And we wish them all the best in the future. Enjoy whatever ride you end up having. Just be careful when you're getting choked. Like just fucking be careful. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. him asking and good for her saying no and we wish them all the best in the future enjoy whatever ride you end up having just be careful when you're getting choked like just be careful yeah yeah yeah have safe words and stuff um i have an alarm like i do on my bed joking jokes jokes uh hey joanna vogue i'm in my mid-20s now but i got into my first serious ish relationship when i was 19 he went out one friday night and about a week later he called me and asked me to come asked my mid-twenties now but I got into my first serious-ish relationship when I was 19. He went out one Friday night and about a week later he called me and asked me to come asked him to come over. He told me the door was unlocked so I let myself into the house. I couldn't find him and

called for him. He texted me and told me he was in his bedroom. I was really confused and walked up the stairs to his room. I found him in his bed with the covers up to his face. I asked him how he was and he told me he had to talk to me. He told me that the week before when he went out that Friday, he accidentally kissed another girl and danced with her for the night. When I finally was able to get words out after the shock had settled, I asked, what do you mean accidentally? He turned and looked me in the eyes and told me that he forgot he was in a relationship with me

and that it wasn't his fault because he had adhd oh wow i went home and sobbed my little eyes out i'm ashamed to say i stayed with him for another seven months but finally called it quits with him when i found out he was stealing money from me for some mary jane while we're in malta for christmas i heard a story stealing money from you just bent on someone else but i heard a story this girlaling money from you to spend on someone else. But I heard a story of this girl that I know and she got really done over by this guy like thousands out of pocket and she was with him for like two years. And he just like he just

had this whole other life going on and he just was like stealing from her. How was he stealing from her? Oh different like he he like he put all these fines onto her credit cards. I swear to God. Yeah mad stuff And she's like In touch with like

Detectives and stuff Like it's a full thing You just It just goes to show You don't know Anyone You don't know what They're up to

You just don't I know I know myself And my family I don't know if you know yourself I've seen you asking yourself questions John In the mirror.

Who are you? How are you today? Who are you gorgeous? Hey, Blondie. Where are you going? Hey, shorty. And with that, we are going to say goodbye to you. We've had a fantastic time.

It's great to do this in real life together I know I really love it yeah it's so much better we're so glad to be back I know we're so glad we're back to ignoring each other all week

so we save stuff for the pod it's great yeah it's really good oh just so you know so basically Joanne and I have been working on merch together we've got our tracksuits they're on sale tomorrow

because this comes out Wednesday so they're on sale on Thursday so the merch will be available we did get limited tracksuits though but we have them in lilac black and cream yeah very exciting they are pretty cool and i think we've got no pads the no pads yeah i have to get you some of the no pads joe they're amazing oh my god water bottles very exciting so they're on sale now mtgm store it's only taken us two years i don't think that's that bad that's not that long No

We've done well We wanted quality We wanted good quality stuff The tracksuits are the best quality Like the jumpers are the best quality I like oversized Over oversized Yeah

So anyway There you go They're out finally Yeah People parade around and stuff And you can't get your hands on it Now you can Well I know

Because we talked about our merch For a very long time And it was only hats Only hats I'm trying to sell hats Which isn't just summer It's not easy It's not merch It's just hats Yeah your hands on it now you can well I know because we talked about our merch for a very long time and it was only hats only hats I'm trying to sell hats which isn't just it's not merch it's just hats

yeah we will see you next we will talk to you again on Friday thank you for listening thank you rate and review Bye.