My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "He wanted to ride me in the car..."

Episode Date: June 7, 2023

This week, the emails go from controlling boyfriends to unwanted, very public displays of affection. Plus, trotters, prunes and Boyzone.If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [e-mail] review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/MTGM is going on tour in Ireland & The UK! Remember to check the venue websites as well as Ticketmaster! For more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

This is a Global Player original podcast. Hello and welcome to my therapist ghosted meme, me Boag Williams and Joanne McNally. Joanne, I was on a job today in the Apollo and I cannot wait until we are playing the Apollo together in September. There are still tickets left for people that are looking to come to a show in September. There are still tickets left for people that are looking to come to a show in London. Joanne, we'll tell you more.

We're on tour. Oh gosh, she puts the voice on. There we go. Okay, everyone's muting you. My purpose goes to me is on tour. And we're going,

we're on tour and here's where we've got tickets left for because a lot of them are gone now but not as many as we'd like we've got a new website

called mytherapistgoes2me.com all the tickets are there all the listing of the venues and those hats that Vogue insisted we make wow I can't believe we bothered Setting up a separate tab for merch It's just hats

Excuse me We've got so much stuff Coming for merch Get lost I think the hats Throwing the hats in Dubai Probably wasn't a great idea Yeah yeah

Throwing the woolly hats in Dubai You're welcome girls Here's where we've got tickets Tickets left for and woolly hats in Dubai. You're welcome, girls. Here's where we've got tickets. Tickets left for Glasgow, Cardiff, Liverpool, Newcastle, Salford, Brighton, Bristol, Liverpool again, London, London, London, Belfast. Oh, and our fifth arena in Dublin.

In Dublin. I was watching Bullseye last night, so I've kind of, I've kind of got one of those. It was so funny. One of the prizes was a tea-making alarm clock machine.

It's like a throwback. I've barely slept a wink. She's talking about sleep. Well, that was just, it's just a phrase people say when they've slept but want to be dramatic. Okay, tell me. I slept for eight hours. That's not the sleep. Well, that was just, it's just a phrase people say when they've slept but want to be dramatic.

Okay, tell me. I slept for eight hours. That's not the point. Anyway, Kim Cattrall. Kim, okay, I thought it was like Kim the comeback Cattrall.

I thought this was going to be, I thought they'd actually written her back into Sex and the City. But has she agreed to be herself on the phone? Yes, she is playing herself on the phone

which was filmed alone with nobody else. Do you know the only person do you know Patricia Field who did all the styling for Sex and the City and she's like famous for it because the style was so cool. So cool yeah. She's left the show now and she'll only work with Kim she's like team Kim

yeah she said Sarah Jessica Parker thinks she knows everything and she does know a lot Cynthia Nixon thinks she knows everything and she knows nothing she said I really feel for whoever's

styling Cynthia Nixon I was like oh no yeah out she does seem like she would be the colder one of all of them

I mean and she literally there's it's no like she didn't have to see anyone but I love it more than anything I can't like I feel like it is like a hug Of all of them? I mean, and she literally, there's, it's no, like she didn't have to see anyone. But I love it more than anything.

I feel like... It is like a hug. I'm very excited for that. It's like one of those, because my love of those women is so full on and was formed late teens, early twenties. They could do no wrong in my eyes. You'd hear that noise.

And you'd be like, oh, I'm skipping. I'm skipping down the street in New York do do do I'm so NY yeah I used to try and copy

their outfits but I just didn't I made an absolute balls did you see the did you see the meme going around you know where Sarah Jessica Parker

turns up to her wedding and then Big doesn't she realises he's stood her up she's like get me out of here and she's got all the feathers and all there was a meme

going around it's like when he turns the map on. And she's got all the feathers and all. There was a meme going around. It's like when he turns the map on, he realized everyone's dressed as a cat. She's like, get me out of here now. Oh no, stop. That was so sad. I have seen Aidan filming on the streets of the NYC. Well, Big's dead.

They have to do something. Killed by a peloton. Would you believe it? I know. I was just on the peloton. Can I just tell you John's away we've said that before running with Spenno

and so now I've roped in John's brother Liam Belton for training for training very good looking fella I've just pimped him

out on my Instagram he is a good looking fella very good looking fella nice boy 27 great head on his shoulders so fertile probably very fertile very young like just great head on his shoulders so fertile probably very fertile

very young like just feels mature for his age so girls I've tagged him on my page oh god it will be gone yeah yeah

I know and I actually felt like I was like is this right to do pimping him out and then I was like no it is right to do and he'll direct you

in the sack he'll be like up and down because they can do that he'll count the thrust because that's what they do yeah yeah yeah and break he'll give you up and down because they can do that he'll count the thrust because that's what they do yeah and break

he'll give you breaks as well during rides that's what rides are missing breaks he'll give you time to refresh a little protein shake in between bit of pre-workout

keep energy levels up yeah great idea bang Liam take it for the team there you go yeah there you go

yeah yeah yeah we did get in trouble what did we say before and there was loads of comments being like they shouldn't speak about him like that was it Colin Farrell

I think we went too far of our love for Colin Farrell did we indeed I don't think that's possible he's a lovely man no I'm sorry we can say what we want about him we fancied him

during his bandana phase which frankly he did not deserve so he did not deserve that can I tell you by the way speaking of people

that we used to fancy I still do obviously now Shane from Boyzone has officially left Boyzone he will never tour with Boyzone again I like

I'm gonna call up because it's well Jo's certainly thinking had he not left years ago like Boys On Our Note I'll go touring there's some like hybrid

with Westlife now it's just no no no no no Keith and Brian Shane no that's that's another thing I'm talking about

Boys On do their own thing as well oh do they every so often yeah like Ronan gets back with the band every so often. They do a big reunion thing.

But Shane has just said, you know, I'm done with it. He's off drifting cars somewhere, which is even, makes him even more attractive. Is Shane the hot one with all the tats and he found Jesus?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't find Jesus on being boys on. You just can't. It's Jesus or boys on. Did he find Jesus? I don't know if he found Jesus. Jesus is your dad,

remember? He's religious now, Shane. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Sean yeah yeah yeah he found something he found something someone he found someone do you want to know something weird that I read

well not weird actually I was into it well I wasn't into it but someone's into it okay we're just nervous now because there's feel the

the atmosphere feels a bit tense out there so we're just trying to cover all our bets I'm scared I'm frightened Joanne I'm frightened again frightened The atmosphere feels a bit tense out there. So we're just trying to cover all our bets. I'm scared. I'm frightened, Joanne.

I'm frightened again. So Quentin Tarantino, he paid, allegedly, over 10k to lick a stripper's feet until they looked like prunes. Now where these rumours come from, I don't know. I mean, the prunes is an extra detail that was probably added

along the way I feel I feel like it would take an awfully long time to lick it till it looks like a prune I think about how long you have to spend

in a swimming pool I feel there's always a nugget of truth in these things but I do feel the licking her feet till they were shriveled up like a prune

is feels to me that's a little magic added at the end which I appreciate well he gave her yeah he gave her a five figure tip to suck her toes and lick the bottoms of her feet

like I couldn't think of doing any I don't like feet I don't like people looking at my feet it makes me feel uncomfortable feet generally don't smell amazing they smell like they've been stuck in a shoe it's not their fault that they smell like that I have no problem with feet absolutely none I really

don't I have no problem with feet at none I really don't I have no problem with feet at all and like Alan's are kind of bent off to the left and all like someone actually his feet are so

what would you say malformed that because he used to play football and he still does but he was like you know kind of

semi-prow or something so his feet he had all these injuries but he was wearing these as Alan would these hideous kind of balenciaga sock boot things or whatever they were not even balenciaga you know one of these kind of like sock booties do you know when the designers just lose their fucking mind and they basically told us to see what shite they can get us to wear what are those yeah yeah and i had a video of him wearing them and someone's

like oh my god it's bunions and I was like oh my god you have eagle eyed cherry over there but they weren't his bunions that's the shape of his foot they kind of swing a left and then they go back off to the right and they're like a hexagon his feet are shaped like a 50p piece does he look like that fella from Narnia what was his name again

Mr Thumbness is that his name this little fella goes around with little trotters name again? Mr. Thumbness. Mr. Thumbness. Is that his name? This little fella goes around with little trotters. Mr. Thumbness. Oh my God, speaking of trotters.

No, hang on, hang on. I want to tell you, I want to tell you one last thing about Quentin Tarantino. So he wrote a scene in Dusk Till Dawn where Salma Hayek

pours tequila down her leg and it forces a guy to drink it off her toes. Guess who he cast in the role? Oh, himself. It was a question. Dirty little bastard. in her leg and it forces the guy to drink it off her toes guess who he cast in the role himself of course he did dirty little bastard I mean

I think I would even drink tequila from Salma Hayek's toes come on yeah and I mean was he ever me too'd no he wasn't Jesus Christ

because it sounds like he's Joe Google him there Quentin Tarantino me too any me too I know there's there are always feet scenes in his films. I think most of his films have a foot scene in.

Apparently the feet are wired near the genitals in the brain. Do you know what? Do you know what I would say? The nipples are forgotten. I have re-found my nipples after breastfeeding oh they're a forgotten piece to the puzzle okay of sexual intercourse yes joe take this on board get in not now obviously josie's probably still got milk in her boob so i would stay away from them for the time being but after that feel free do you know what you're actually you're you're so

so right the nipples are often forgotten. Often forgotten. I had forgotten. Yeah. Because I'd been breastfeeding for so long. And they were so upset. I actually find it kind of irritating if anyone tries to tickle my nipples. Oh, no.

I absolutely love it. Yeah, I know. I've told you several times I don't like it, Vogue, yet you continue to try and tickle my nipples. I'm always trying to latch on. I don't find it a good crack. I'm sorry now just let me try

every time I'm like please please just in Liverpool tomorrow let me just have a little lick of the nip

I want to tell you about other fetishes really quickly really quickly Matthew McConaughey likes to bring food into the bedroom allegedly

that's not a fetish that's just that's just hospitality allegedly and again it's about snacking it keeps your libido up it keeps you on track

it gives you energy let's not forget snack is important eh Kristen Stewart said Stewart sorry said Robert Pattinson

enjoys licking armpits allegedly yeah that sounds like a kind of a lad's buzz there well it's allegedly but supposedly she said that

But I can't imagine Anyone wants to lick a piss But she's Yeah I don't think they end well But anyway Allegedly No well we know They didn't end well

We saw what happened Okay fine Yeah Jo Christ We don't have to allegedly Everything She's trying to control us Shall we do a couple of

Listener emails Oh fuck it Folk Firstly when are you Getting tested for ADHD? Okay and goodbye We've had a great I actually

I did get the number to somebody Yeah it needs to happen Only because you're drilling it into my head It needs to happen I don't think I'd like to be medicated for it I feel like I get a lot done because of it Yeah but the medication they give you, then you can give to me.

They give you Adderall, which I want. I heard if you take Adderall, you can't sleep and you can't wee or anything and you can't eat. That's what I heard. Really? Well, you know, I'm scared of meds anyway. There was a documentary.

Netflix have this series of documentaries that I think they're supposed to be talking us out of doing certain substances but actually they just make you want to do them so like

they're like understand what's in your pills there's an episode on Xanax there was an episode on Adderall and I was like that was just an ad for Adderall like that just made me want Adderall anyway speaking of trotters that was such a good segue

well done I saw this thing on insta that during prohibition when the lads were kind of like running moonshine across the place, they didn't want to leave footprints. So they stuck cow's hooves onto their feet. So when they were running around, it just looked like they'd left cow prints everywhere.

Really? Yeah. You do find out the most interesting things. I do wonder where you gather this information. I'll never know. It's like just a secret vault. The Gram. It's a new wiki.

I need to start following people that you follow I don't know where I'm at I'm getting really personal on the gram I'm trying to mute a few people and stuff like that I'm just trying to like

clean up my gram are you and I want to follow yeah I want to follow some fun things like I love that celebrities in the wild influences in the wild

I love it and I love the lad bibles too have you seen the ones history and colour you'd like it it's where they take these old black and white photos

and then they well turn them into colour photos and they're the weirdest they've become like real human beings you must tell us about your top 10

instagrams you followed you on we'd be very interested to hear about it well I'm very I'm very invested on I'm very deep in tiktok now

I spend most of the morning watching How You Know If Your Cat's Italian videos. Anyway, readers emails. No, we're the reader. Listeners emails. Listeners emails. Hi girls, I'm 23

and I've been with my boyfriend for almost two years. This summer, me and the girls want to go on holiday together. Nothing wild, just girls together, having a nice time and drinking by the pool.

My boyfriend has flipped. Excuse me. We've already got a holiday booked together for the end of the year, so it's not like I've chosen the girls over him. He just kept saying that he had no idea this was coming, and it's a bit of a shock. He's not exactly said he thinks I'll cheat, but

he keeps saying that he doesn't like the idea of the holiday and would be worried I also 1000% would never cheat I if I tell the girls

I can't go they'll wonder why I changed my mind to health ooh don't tell the girls you can't go no no no

no no now I remember if I throw my mind right back to when I was that age I remember it was around the time of the

Leaving Cert holiday and the lad I was going out with at the time we had separate Leaving Cert holidays planned and I do remember being a bit nervous

that he was going to cheat because everyone cheats at that stage and I knew he didn't really like me that much but you can't ask him not to go

No you can't ask somebody not to go on holiday That sets it up for you're setting a standard then that he can tell you what you can't ask him not to go no you can't ask somebody not to go on holidays that sets it up you're setting a standard then that he can tell you what you can do and what you can't do

it's not like you're but also you want to go with your friends so you're 23 you deserve to go on holidays absolutely and trust me your friendships are going to last

longer than the relationship and that's just the God's honest truth so your friendships are the thing to mind your friendships are just as important as romantic relationships Do you know what though

I remember I booked a holiday to go out with my friend and my boyfriend at the time got really annoyed and he ended up coming on the holiday

Not cool I've just thought about that yeah that did happen I've actually just remembered that and that was not and you know what we did not last

No because it's you have to the key is space space you liked it like I love spending time with Spenny

but I also like like we have to go out and do things with our own friends as well like it's really important you need to go and do your own thing

you need to have your own friends you don't want to be just like locked in together all the time I know we just get sick of each other I think that's the key

and like I said I'm a big believer in the importance of friendship and prioritising friendship is so important I find when I was younger in particular I wouldn't do it now

but like when I started going out with someone my friendships just they just didn't matter as much as this one single individual human being that I was putting everything into.

Everything. Love, sex, socialising, everything. Yeah, I know, but it's a mistake. It is a mistake and you have to try and figure out so that doesn't happen. Like, I actually am so, like, I have got so many good friends. Like, I've got a lot of friends. Like, we've been friends kind of since we were 18. And like, love you.

We're a rocky star, but yeah, since we were 18. And like, love you. You're a rocky star, but yeah, I'm a guy. But then like, I've got my friends since I literally started secondary school and like,

I feel so lucky to have that core group of friends that are just early. So just my, I would say go on the holidays. Just tell him he, like he needs to just trust you

and he needs to relax and it doesn't say, it doesn't bode well for your future. If you think you have one say it doesn't bode well for your future if you think you have one it doesn't bode well that he's got an issue with you going on holidays with your friends because all to be able like why are you so what like why are you so paranoid about me cheating do you think that's something you would do are you projecting yeah do you know what i mean i agree I agree girls here's another one

had to send this in following on from the woman and her only friend's boyfriend my fella wanted to ride me

in the car the other night fine like but we were in the middle of town ah come on now yeah yeah

you gotta be sneaky about it we pulled down a side street and started getting steamy I said he had no chance and he sulked

for the rest of the evening didn't even ride me when we got in what a fucking baby if you don't want to ride me in the bed you can't ride me on the road that would be what I would say

no no Benny went through an obsession with that where he would like try and like ride in different places I'd be like

can we just like there's people around i don't want it's not cute if we get caught particularly by family members it's not cute it's not cute that's not cute cute alan was trying to drag me onto the kitchen floor one night i was like alan like the bed i can see the bed like come on oh i can stone cold tiles and i'm kind of in i can be i can be coaxed into the shower. I can, like,

I kind of don't mind once it's around the house and no one else is around. I just don't want to get caught. Yeah. I've started locking the bathroom door now because there was, um, the bath seemed to be kind of like a, he was seeing that as kind of an invitation. Oh,

I see. Yeah. Like just a wet, sexy pool. And I was like, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no No no no this is my wet sexy pool Yeah Yeah I'm just going to seduce this glass And we're allowed all alone Thank you I get into the bath and honestly I'm like I'm going to have a really long nice bath

Ten minutes later I'm like this is way too hot get me out Same Would you share bath water I would allow Spencer to use my bath water when I was finished yes you would allow Spencer to use your dirty bath water yeah but I would not get into

his bath water no I'd get into anyone's bath water oh do you want I would there's very few people I wouldn't share bath water with I would no I would really find that un with I would What's going to happen is When the apocalypse comes you're going to have no immune System because You're not exposing yourself to germs

Whereas I'll literally survive With the cockroaches I eat Excuse me I eat stuff off the floor and everything like that We were actually eight I was walking to you It's not the real floor it's a penthouse in Battersea it's not an actual floor we were walking home

from nursery like the thing is always spotless and Tia dropped something on the ground outside like just where they like do all the bins at co-op and stuff like that

and like he was like he picked it up to eat it and I was like Tia no no no no and he was like 10 second rule mama I was like oh no I think it's like 10 second rule mama I was like oh no

I think it's an important learning I think it's good for your gut health possibly hello Joanne and Vogue I'm a bisexual woman and in a pickle I know both of you

are straighty 180 I don't know about are we straighty straighty well I don't know I could be I mean it depends who it was I suppose I mean now

it's kind of like now that it's kind of opened doors I think it would be sad to die without one lesbian flinging me okay

yep one yeah I don't think anyone's straighty 180 like I just I think men I think men get very

locked into their straightness and they're like I'm straight because they see you know what I mean they find the whole thing quite they can be I think men get very locked into their straightness and they're like, I'm straight! Because they see, you know what I mean? They find the whole thing quite, they can be, they're easily emasculated and they have certain ideas about what it means to be a man

and it's all very alpha. But like, women aren't the same. We're like, yeah, whatever. Yeah. I have been with my boyfriend of nearly five years but have been feeling attraction towards women increasingly more including having hot and heavy dreams with women

he knows I'm bisexual and last year we broke up for three months in order for me to explore my sexuality but I got very lonely and missed him a lot as he's my best friend and we got back together I'd like to know your opinion on this as I can't stop thinking about having sex and potentially being with women now it's a tough one because I think when you're in a relationship and

you really can't stop thinking about having sex with somebody else it's never I would really I would probably take some of that on board I don't really think it's fully to do with you being bisexual either I think it's maybe because you're looking for something more like yeah a woman her needs are not

being met I know oh I don't know and also she's in that difficult position where she's going out with like her best friend

I know and it's a five year relationship and they obviously have a nice relationship and there's like a friendship there and it's probably quite easy and domestic and you know how the other one works and but you obviously you've got a need

in you your groins are rumbling for something else actually you know what though now maybe this is incorrect to say but I wonder would it be worth saying to him look you know I'm bi I wouldn't mind kind of hooking up with a woman just kind of get it out of my system for the moment because it's just

really boiling up in me and I don't want to break up with you because maybe because it's the opposite that's kind of having your cake and eating it

I don't really think that's fair on him yeah but I think nowadays everything is so open and flowy flowy that it's like well either I leave you

or you let me just go off and explore this thing but she kind of had three months he did kind of let her go off

for three months and have an exploration station but then she wanted to get back on him because she missed him I don't I don't

I don't know I just think maybe because it's another woman he might be like okay he mightn't feel the same trash as if it was another man I don't know I just think maybe because it's another woman he might be like okay he mightn't feel the same threat as if it was another man

I don't know look I'm not qualified I'm just shooting the shit she's very underqualified actually if we're going to really go there

I tried to qualify and they were like no I'd be very wary of what you listened to from Joanne they broke in and took the qualification

off the wall well everyone thank you very much for listening that has been the bonus episode of My Therapist Goes With Me

hold on we did not we made no effort to solve that girl's issue Joanne you have a I think you're I think that she

obviously wants to sleep with other people and maybe Vogue reads out a problem they're like I don't know what to do. My life is over. And Vogue's like, okay, well, that's it for this week.

I've heard my voice enough. Thank you and good night. Bonne nuit. Okay, well, that's all for this week. We've done our best. Okay. Okay. Okay.

I thought we answered that well Joe did you not I thought it was good advice good advice average mediocre not great actually not our best