My Therapist Ghosted Me - Pleasure At The Fairground

Episode Date: December 1, 2023

This time, Vogue & Joanne are backstage at The 3Arena in Dublin, talking Hugh Grant, Celebrity Mastermind (there's been a development!) and 'what makes a house a home.' Also, if you haven't listened to "Good Girls" yet, make sure you do! If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [e-mail] review Global's Privacy Policy: global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.com/For more information about Joanne's gigs, visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

This is a Global Player Original Podcast. Me, Joanne McNally. Yes, you stood out there, but it is her, Joanne McNally. She forgot. It's been a long day. It's been a long week. It's been a long life, if I'm honest. Not long enough for me, I will tell you. Okay? I have had several,

I've had some requests. Some requests come in and frankly, they're quite rude and we ignore them. But some requests come in, I go, that's actually fair. We need to start a corrections corner. There has been

several personal requests for me to ask you to stop talking about death. Listen, I am sorry. We are trying to be a lighthearted bit of escapism for the listeners. Okay, fine. Let's pretend it's not happening. Fine. You're very doom and gloom about your impending death. It's like you know something we don't know.

Maybe I do. You're like a sexy Nostradamus. Thank you very much. I appreciate that. Come here to me. Great news. Go on. The Elf on the Shelf

is coming back, Joanne. Are you excited to start our month with the elf? Is that prick still working? I thought he was a long gone. That little bastard's coming back. I've got three of them now.

Oh my God. It's going to be a busy schedule for me this month. I don't know if I can do the pod every week because I'm doing Elf on the Shelf now. So what's to be a busy schedule for me this month. I don't know if I can do the pod every week because I'm doing off on the shelf now. So what's the strategy?

Would you not just put them in the pool and say they drowned? No, I would not do that. Well, I mean, it's not the worst idea. Who started off on the shelf? Who started this shit? Some Mattel, I would say.

They're costing me a fortune this Christmas. It sounds like a kind of a gloop. What's Gwenny's thing? Gloop? What's her thing? Goop. This sounds like a kind of a gloop. What's Gwenny's thing? Groop? What's her thing? Goop. This sounds like a goop.

Who's the goopy mom? Who does all that shit? Me. Oh. I can't wait. I've done a collab with the North Pole. I will one day. You wait.

I'll be in Santa's house before you know it. I fucking know you will. I will be there. I'm going to Lapland. Swipe up, Santi. Go, Santi Bear. I don't care what anyone says. I would give Santa one.

I think he's a good looking man. I would. Imagine all the stuff you'd get out of him. Speaking of Santa. You'd never pay for a bicycle again, folk. Do you know why once when I was younger, did I tell you that story go on um you know you used to do your Santa letter so I'd go wild obviously because it was Santa you can get you whatever you

want and then I got a letter back from Santa when you're basically saying I was uh I was uh I was asking for too much and I was being like really bad yeah I did and so I got the letter and I was like Jesus Santa's after writing me that took it into school to show everybody like a little gobshite. Being like, look, Santa said I asked for too much thinking I was dead. He's like, I'd had Santa's autograph. You're like, I drove him to respond to a human child because I'm such a greedy bitch. Hey guys, gather around. More, more, more.

My kids actually don't choose stuff, which I love. So I plant ideas in their head. How long ago did we talk about Barbie's Dreamhouse which I love. So I plant ideas in their head. Yeah. How long ago did we talk about Barbie's dream house? Oh, yeah. Am I getting it? It's happening for me because I bought it. It was actually on sale.

Black Friday. It was on sale. Oh, yeah. Got the dream house, which I really want myself. Is it the one with the slide down to the pool and all? Of course it's the one with the slide down to the pool. It is a dream gaff, in fairness. It's like, I think it's four stories high and then I couldn't help myself

I also got the camper van because Barbie wants to go on holidays and who am I to not let her go on holidays we love a holiday we do love a holiday I wonder what Barbie's house

would cost if you put it in like fuck all it doesn't even have any walls yeah that's actually really true yeah it doesn't have a roof either that house costs nothing

there's some plumbing issues there you're dead right a bit of plasterboard that's a lot someone needs to ring the landlord it's falling apart what did you get in the Black Friday sales in the end

nothing oh my god so I I have a funny relationship with Black Friday as in it's only new it's an American thing

I don't know why we're suddenly doing it I mean it's going on years but yes it's only new okay well it's new here well it used to be the thing that people

it's new here it's new Jo I don't like that face now it's new here five Well, it used to be the thing that people, it's new here. It's new, Jo. I don't like that face now. It's new here. Five or ten years. Ten years new. So what the fuck, you've suddenly started

doing research. Since when do you know anything that we just podcast? Did you just Google that? Yeah. Fake news, Jo. It used to be back in the day

and you'd watch it in the Americas and they'd be in the Americas and they'd be outside and they'd be like literally falling through the glass doors and all. And they'd be outside and they'd be like literally falling through the glass doors and all. And all the staff would just be flattened. They'd be squashed to death because

they'd be going in to get a 10 quid off a Vera Wang wedding dress. No, sorry, that was an episode of Friends. Yeah, it was. Or was that Sex and the City? No, it was Monica in Friends. Did you see the Black Friday sale? And these BBC cameras went to a PC world expecting this stampede of people

and they opened the doors and there was just one man standing there. Was that this year? No, that was probably about eight or nine years ago when they first started. Yeah, because it's all online. Yeah, and he's like, I'm just here to drop something off.

I just wanted to refund something. Well, so I don't get it. I was like, I'm not arsed at Black Friday because I was like, I don't want to buy shit I don't need. Do you know what I mean? I don't need a fucking robot hoover or whatever that everyone's buying at the moment. Well, you do because I have one and you do need one. Yeah because I was like, I don't want to buy shit I don't need. Do you know what I mean? I don't need a fucking robot hoover or whatever

that everyone's buying at the moment. Well, you do because I have one and you do need one. I would like one of them actually. I do see yours kind of zipping around there.

That's pretty fucking cool because you could put things on them and get them to carry them over. Yeah, you could. I actually haven't done that with Rodney yet. You could stick a wine glass on that thing now.

Anyway, I was like, I don't need anything even though I do because I have a flat with nothing in it. But I was like, I don't want to go down that road. I needed to get broadband.

You got broadband on Black Friday? So I went on. Now, I went on, long story short, I got it for half price on the Black Friday sale.

So then, when I came out of that, I can't believe, she's after getting, she's no bed, but she's gotten broadband. She has no, she doesn't have a fucking spoon in the house

and she's got broadband I need to get on TikTok the second I get in there I actually that's what actually feeds me I don't need a spoon I can't believe you have broadband yeah

half price broadband I got on the Black Friday sale On a Monday So I told her to finish on the Friday But it went on a week So then I kind of I was like

Oh my god The sales Yeah You get all the bits In the Black Friday sale And then Alan heard That I'd gotten my broadband For half price

And he's with the same provider Here I'm with that provider I want that half price broadband Well Alan Wow I was like Your head's gonna pop off Alan and he's with the same provider. Here, I'm with that provider. I want that half-assed bullpen. Well, Alan, wow. I was like, your head's going to pop off, Alan. You're very angry. He's like, I'm working hard now for you.

It keeps going up. And you're going to have it right. Anyway, I hear him down in the kitchen. He's on to them going, I want to speak to someone in the loyalty department. It's like, how do you know they've got a loyalty department? She's a psychopath

He's a complainer Alan though Oh If you feel Because he works in sales He loves to complain Anyway Did he get 20 quid off his then as well Stop

Yeah Apparently there's a loyalty department For people like Alan Do you know what Who just kick off Once a year When their Bill goes up

And they see pricks like me Get it for half price Well anyone listening to this Podcast Like me I think you should ring your Broadband provider tomorrow And demand Bill goes up and they see pricks like me getting it for half price. Well, anyone listening to this podcast, like me, I think you should ring your broadband provider tomorrow and demand. Ask for the loyalty department.

We want 20 quid off. I got a few bits on Black Friday. I got all my Christmas presents done. Everything is done now. I just have to get Spencer something, but I'm still working on just like swapping out something that we're both getting. You know?

Swapping. Like, I mean, like we're going on holidays together. Can he not pay my half? I'll pay his half. I said to you, me and Al are just going to swap cash, which means we won't swap anything because what's the point? I'd love Svenny to throw money at me and I'd just throw it back at him. That's done.

Yeah, you're like, you rev me, I'll rev you back. Happy Christmas. That's what I want. He's just not playing ball with it though. He doesn't want to do it. What does he want? I don't know. Something sentimental.

I'm getting him a coffee machine because I want a coffee machine yeah fair enough I always intercept his presents from his mom because she gets him really good presents and she was like

have you seen this Dolce & Gabbana toaster I was like Spenny was drooling over that for his birthday actually you should get him that do you know what I was looking for do you know

do you because I met someone recently who has a toaster that you it's transparent like you can see it's see through oh yeah I like the idea of that

so you can watch the toast cook which is where that's where I am in my life I have time now the tour is finished I don't mind I wouldn't mind sitting around

watching toast it's kind of like watching paint dry it's quite high end though but anyway so obviously because now that I have now that I have the broad pant

now that I have the real sustenance of my life sorted in the flat I can start looking at getting like egg cups and shit like that I will say

broadband and TV is what makes a house a home you're just such a big softie really aren't you not the kids get out Theodore

I'm trying to relax with the TV it is what makes a house a home I think you know what you're absolutely right you know that's what they say

so come here to me tell me about your week which is the same as my week oh this is what I wanted to say bit of a correction corner I've had a couple of mails obviously a lot of mails asking

you to stop talking about deaths the next biggest mail I had was that the email that we did last week

saying that there was a woman wrote in saying that her boyfriend was spending all his money on Mary Jane

and me well I think I was absolutely horrified that he was spending it on some fucking slag

it's marijuana I said Mary Jane is just another girl and you were some fucking slag it's marijuana I said Mary Jane's just another girl and you were like yeah we did we were like that slag from the office we were kicking off

well Joanne and I don't do drugs you see or slut shame so Mary Jane yeah sorry Mary Jane we didn't realise it takes two to tango if that is

if that is what that is but if it is we again apologies sorry we didn't know what that was do you know what speaking of drugs right

I was out with my mum and my auntie and they were talking to me about this doctor that they used to go and see when they were younger Dr Chapman and he had them all

on these slimming tablets and it was speed yeah she was like my eyes used to look so funny at work and people would come and say something to me

and I was like what the doctors gave them all speed back in the day it was an amphetamine there was just families of women doing drugs together unknowingly and say something to me and I was like what? The doctors gave them all speed back in the day. It was an amphetamine. There was just families of women doing drugs together unknowingly.

Speed. Getting high all day together. I don't even know if speed's still a thing these days is it? I think it's the amphetamine there used to be and there was cocaine and Coca-Cola wasn't that kind of the buzz

that they got off it and stuff? Look different times. Yeah it was. Different times. But yeah I do remember I mean I'm not I wasn't alive at the time but the story behind

amphetamines like there was just these it was like back like I'm surprised that your aunties were doing it I thought this was kind of back in the 40s 50s no it was then

they were given it by a doctor women fucking like hoovering all day and night we were just given those skinny teas and sent to the toilet

yeah like it was desperate. Also absolutely desperate. Did you watch the Robbie Williams documentary? About halfway through, I would say. I was kind of excited. I think it's really good. I think it's brilliant.

I was expecting something a little more joyous. It's not joyous. It's not. I will agree with you there. It's not joyous. I'm on F3. And the joy is well and truly sucked out of me. But I really respect him.

I just, and you know what? He's one of those people, I used to love him when I was growing up. He was one of the people that I used to fancy. I didn't realise how famous he was.

When they show footage of him back, which for anyone who hasn't watched it yet, it's basically, I think it's like a four part series on Netflix where they go back over his career. Yeah.

And he watches it. And then he watches clips and kind of talks about what was going on and obviously they're all that big fallout with Gary and all that but when they show footage of him

he was like 16 when he he was so young but he was gorgeous I know I used to fancy the kind of he's like a

he's like a cartoon character his face is perfection but he's super talented like a really talented writer and everything but like I actually met him once

we were at the Pride of Britain Spenny and I were standing on the red carpet and obviously Robbie Williams was beside us and we were like oh my god oh my god

and he came over and just started talking to us he was sound and his wife also sound yeah she does seem sound

yeah she's gorgeous in fairness Robbie's not gonna marry a munter yeah he's not gonna marry a minger a boring minger and she was really

sound but I just thought that they were really nice. And then watching his documentary because he is now one of my good friends and I met that one time and said three words to, I just felt nice to see my friends

doing so well on Netflix. Of course. So proud of you, Robbie. I was so proud. You've come so far. Robbie, well done. I was fascinated. I didn't realise the fallout

between him and Gary was so bad. I know, but he kind of, and I will say, sorry, I'm dropping another name. I met Gary Byler before. Bad. I know. But he kind of. And I will say. I'm sorry. I'm dropping another name. I met Gary Byler. Because I was interviewing him. Also.

So sound. Yeah. Really nice. They weren't. Not all of them were. As giving as Gary. Got it. But maybe they call him.

Say no more. Giving Gary. Howard's a. Yeah. Did you see the news? Oh God, we're gone again. What the fuck? We need an itinerary. Where are you now?

I wasn't really a boy band fan I'm not even trying to now okay here I was like I liked Mick Hucknall how did I I I

cannot believe we've never discussed Mick Hucknall Pleasure at the Fairground Pleasure no don't pleasure me Mick though because I don't fancy Mick not Pleasure at the Fairground Pleasure No Don't pleasure me Mick though Because I don't fancy Mick

Not pleasure at the fairground Oh What is it Fairground is just a song Pleasure at the fairground On the waves Yes I love the thought The thought of coming home to you

Even if I know you can't make it We're just like the sugar babes Joanne and I Aren't we Joanne and I at our show We're the sugar babes Joanne and I aren't we Joanne and I at our show we're the sugar babes Jo you can be Siobhan

Joanne and I at our show and actually we can't even play it for you here because it was so we basically we in our show

Joanne and I sing a song and so basically we sang it live singing is a stretch we kind of croak and shriek we screeched

yeah very much like a banshee but we tried our best on the first night quickly to realise that we sounded absolutely awful so what we did

was we recorded it separately and sent it on to be auto-tuned and then it was played back to us and we were like why

on the stage for the rehearsal and we were like no no no you need to auto-tune that we want the auto-tune version and the hell room was like yeah girls that's what that is and we were like oh it still sounds like our vocal

chords are being stabbed i actually i really wanted to play a snippet of both of us because we haven't listened to it back yet but i think it would be so funny like not a musical ear no ears at all like you know it was so Straight when I was You thought you could sing I thought I could sing You insisted I'm doing it live Sometimes

Sometimes people say I was like guys I've got this Three arena Give me a mic It's fine I can bang in I'll shout you

I This is like when I I've convinced myself I have a good sense of direction I absolutely fucking don't I just thought this thing I always thought I could sing. There was a time

when I could sing. No, Joanne, I don't think there was because when you were telling me you could sing and you were humming little lines, it wasn't great. I was about 16, 17

and then it just kind of went away. I guess I just didn't hone. I just don't think you've ever heard yourself back. Yeah, no, that's fair. I went to singing lessons. I wouldn't mind. I paid money

to Mary Melody to try and teach me how to sing that was her name she was a singing teacher in Rahini where I'm from in Ireland well I'm not

from there I'm obviously from home but it's just down the road sorry everyone about that noise it's it's the water we're in the

three arena so we don't know what's happening it's not our fault but we're not three arena but we didn't want to pay for plumbing so there's just fecal matter i actually walked here i actually walked here from

hoods because i was like i'm not paying a taxi on top of everything you also don't have to pay for for this show no way and girls you have to pour the pour drinks yourself for the bar because we said we're not paying for the stuff yeah 100 percent i don't really remember his hair and down in any one of the waltzes I don't think that was it Oh god Well that's what you were suggesting Pleasure at the fairgrounds

Stop you've made me have an image of like Imagine he was going down and you'd just see his hair That's why he has it Something to hold on to Fucking driving around down there Just Mick walking out of the waltzers With a harness on him no just Mick walking out of the waltzers with a

harness on him oh no see you in the bumper cars in 20 Mick would you do it would you do it oh god

absolutely for the content for the girls ah yeah come on for the crack because Mick had he's a real lethargy out and remember he came out with that really public Absolutely. For the content for the girls. Ah yeah. Come on for the crack. Because Mick had

he's a real lethargy and remember he came out with that really public apology. He's like to the thousands of women I slept with I apologise.

I'm not being bad but I don't think without the fairground I don't think he would have slept with thousands of women. Well no no no no he was very big. What was it?

It was Simply Red Joe have a Google there. Fairground was his biggest hit. No no no no. It was. Holding was the Simply Red Joe have a google there Fairground was his biggest hit no no no it was holding back the years holding back the years

love that tune yeah big fans Joanne loves music get her a bit of Mick Hucknall some Leonard Cohen I actually kind of

thought I hit it out there that wasn't the worst one you've done yeah you fucking throw me now I'm not here anymore Mick Girls Aloud

Girls Aloud I wanted Aloud. I wanted to announce, not that they haven't done a good job themselves. Girls on every Are you announcing the Girls Aloud are on a new tour? I want you all to know, Girls Aloud have reunited. They're back. They're going on tour. Cheryl

Summer gone, what? Oh my God. Vogue Williams just told me I'm going on tour it's wild it is wild yeah I know it is I'd go in a shot oh we're going we're definitely going

such good tunes like the I the Girls Aloud mega mix I used as my walk on song

somewhere along the way I can't remember fucking great everyone loves Girls Aloud every single Sound of the Underground what a what a tune

to even begin with they're so good they're just quality women you can sense it all of them but you know Girls Aloud Sound of the Underground beat of the drum goes round and around

is this just a musical episode that we're doing I think we're writing a musical Jo are we writing a musical Hamilton but shit so I want to tell you something

Girls Aloud said that Hugh Grant basically resurrected their career in Love Actually they said that they were going down the tubes and then that they were

what? yeah and then they got to be in Love Actually and Hugh Grant resurrected their career and guess who I saw last week

I'm sure Richard Curtis resurrected their career I think we're giving Hugh a little too much credit there no I've taken a real dislike their career. I think we're giving Hugh a little too much credit there. No, I've taken a real dislike into Hugh Grant. I saw him the other day. Vogue, what the fuck is going on?

I don't know. I keep seeing famous people everywhere. You're like that kid from the 60s with celebrities. I see famous people. No, Vogue, you're the famous person so I see him sometimes out and about

just being Hugh Grant just doing Hugh things I've yet to see him smile I will admit yeah but no one's smiling dragging their kids to school

I think the reason I've kind of gone off him is because I chose him as my specialist topic no one knows why when I did Michael McIntyre's

The Wheel and knew nothing about him it was a research call that went completely off the rails and so then the show came around

and of course I didn't do anything I'm just spinning around in this chair in front of Michael McIntyre and he's asking me all this

shit about cute I'm like who? I had no clue so I made a total shit on myself who was my special subject on the way up?

pop culture's a bit broad Hugh Grant and this is why I know he's a bit of a moody monster he said the role that he played which is closest to him

in his whole film career was Your Man About A Boy which I was like that's yeah that is kind of he was like that's the closest to me that's the closest to me character I've ever played he was Your Man About a Boy which I was like that's yeah that is kind of he was like that's the closest to me

that's the closest to me character I've ever played he was a bit of a grump yeah but he was a nice grump but like he's obviously a grump you can see that he's a grump ah yeah I mean man

like showing present company excluded because we medicated you as soon as we met you didn't we we said that man is depressed get him on something

or he's not on the pod because Hugh Grant was your topic on the wheel he's not on the pod because Hugh Grant was your topic on the wheel do you want to tell me some Hugh Grant facts or will I tell you well

I mean did you hear the rest of the story Hugh Grant he's an actor of American descent he speaks fluent French French

yes we all do he had he purchased I said that shit as well he purchased an Andy Warhol painting for four million off Elizabeth Taylor and then sold it for 23.5.

I like that Elizabeth sold it to him even though they were going out at the time. Were they going out? That's Elizabeth Taylor. Oh. What? Who the fuck is Elizabeth Taylor? She's like this really old

amazing actress. Is she dead? Is she dead? Oh, she's dead. Is she dead? When was that? I like that. I like that.

She's That was very kind of her. Giselle Aduba. Post-Humas. That's the best way to talk about people everyone loves everyone after they're dead he won a Golden Globe

and a BAFTA this is all news to me he won an Oscar what? he didn't do a nude scene in four weddings and a funeral when a makeup artist

asked if he wanted definition painted on his body I would take the definition I used to get abs spray tanned on did you ever do that? the definition I used to get abs spray tanned on did you ever do that? no

and you used to get the outer part of your leg sprayed darker yeah no I haven't been in a position where I've needed to do that yet well when I used to be thirsty

back in the day I've rehydrated since yeah but when I used to be thirsty doing all the bikini back in the beep beep days yeah beep beep yeah

spraying my abs thank you but he's obviously so offended that they're like do you want a bit of do you want a bit of do you want a bit of help there in your

abdominal department i.e. oh do you think it was the dick department no it's abdominal okay well I mean

it's a nude scene I think the only thing you'd really be worried about would be the but did you not say that they were read the quote to me again

after a make-up artist coming out of his ab he's got big problems asked if he wanted definition painted on his body say that they read the quote to me again after because if his dick is coming out of his ab he's got big problems asked if he wanted definition painted on his body but his dick is his body

but maybe it wasn't I don't know oh I would have thought definition to me is like you know doodling on abs if you sprayed

along the top of the dick you'd give it length you'd give it length you'd snap it like a nose what you meant to do was actually illuminate snap it

a little illuminator on the top I would backing dance for Girls Aloud yeah I might have you seen my dancing I was going to say have they seen your dancing have you seen your dancing

do you know what I'm gonna do what what no it's not bad it's just you did it and you had a

kind of I don't know now I'm scared what are you up and down experience so I decided against doing it but I've

I've it's come back around and I've decided I want to do it you want to do what Celebrity Mastermind oh my

god are you and I'm going to take Hugh Grant as my specialist topic because I feel you're not actually doing it you're not actually doing it I am yeah

I said I'd do it okay swear in your life you said you'd do it I swear in my life Joanne McNally like I am telling you it's going to be that's the worst decision

you've ever made in your life a lot of comedians are doing it they all seem to be doing really well okay I think you should I think you're really clever but I also thought I was really clever That's the worst decision you've ever made in your life. Well, the comedians are doing it. They all seem to be doing really well. Okay. I think you should. I think you're really clever.

But I also thought I was really clever until I did Celebrity Mastermind. And they did me over. Well, it's a very... It does have good viewership. Okay. They asked me to do it again. And I said, no. Do you know why? Do you want me to read you some of my questions?

I'm trying to move into television. Jo, get up some of my questions there. Get up some of my Celebrity Mastermind questions And we'll see if you should do Celebrity Mastermind You are like Weirdly intelligent About weird things

Like you know loads of stuff about I don't know like Gonorrhea and stuff like that Yeah That's because I have a morbid Curiosity about STIs But like You know

I don't think that's going to be a huge Win on Celebrity Mastermind You never know Important topic Okay you ready Yeah Joanne McNally On Celebrity Mastermind.

Indeed. Which is the most southerly of the mainland states in the United States of America? Can you repeat the question, please? Which is the most southerly of the mainland states in the United States of America?

This has nothing to do with Hugh Grant. Hugh Grant is my specialist topic, please. Go again. What is, okay, what region on the Outer Hebrides often thought of as a separate island is famous for the tweed

traditionally made there? Excuse me? Yeah. They were my questions. Go on. I need that translated into my local language. I don't even know

what the Hebrides are. What the fuck are, what are the Hubbardies are they islands would you like one more is there is there is there clues

do charades in which city was Adrian Mole living when his first diary at the age of 13 and three quarters oh was it

Sussex Essex Bristol Birmingham no you give one answer it's not multiple choice here. You can't just keep saying answers. What is it, Jo?

Nottingham. I would never have gotten that name. No, no, no. And do you know what? The amount of shit I get over being in this. They're very tough questions. Very tough questions. Okay, last one.

What is a common name for either of the triangular bones in the scapula of the upper part of the human body? I'll have to pass on that. I would have said collarbones but I not collarbones those ones on your back shoulder blades

anyway I don't even know the answers no but I love that folk has the questions to hand so if anyone says anything about going on Celebrity Mastermind she's like

think again my friend I was wearing the shoulder blade well I got two right in fairness when I did that but it was absolutely humiliating but I wish you all the best interesting interesting

I kind of yeah I just see a lot of the comedians doing it if they give you really easy questions to make me look even more stupid

I'll be raging they would never do that I'm like find out who's in charge Jo Joanne's going to be one of those I'll do it if I win I'll go if I win

a lot of them a lot of the comedians are winning and they're doing really well on your head so be it I wish you the best of luck enjoy it my luck enjoy it my friend

enjoy it thank you so much to everyone tagging us in your oh that's I love that unwrapped

yeah thank you so much it's looked really nice to see and it's interesting to see our competition yeah it is interesting to see yeah it is

100% same people floating around for those tagging me when we're at number 4 please stop doing that yeah we don't need that we only want the number 1's

yeah on the 4th it's a bit you know a bit of a punch in the face and also thank you to everyone who's bought our single because it went to number 1 in the iTunes charts

in Ireland excuse me vote can I congratulate you on your and she won a bongo player Just after we spent 45 minutes

Talking about the fact That we can't sing for shit Congratulations on your Number one Pop tune Pop tune in Ireland Congratulations I'm really glad

I found somebody Who could actually do auto-tune Not you Jo Yeah Jo Like that person Actually auto-tuned her She sounds really good In that single

I sound amazing in that Now I'm a better singer Than you I am Do you reckon Yeah I am So tell us I'll interview you Okay go on

Vogue Congratulations on your number one single In Ireland Oh thank you very much It was probably going to be Christmas number one But sadly Shane McGann has passed So

Tell us Where did it all come from? Where did the idea For Good Girls come from? Oh well the idea came Because I had Absolutely nothing to do with myself When I was living in Australia

At a time Back in the day When I was living there alone, completely alone on my own. And I got asked to do a songwriting camp. And I thought, why not? I've always wanted to be a pop star. Why don't I give this a whirl? And I went and I recorded the song and helped write the lyrics. Yeah. I mean, life's a bitch, then you die.

That's. As we said, I termed that coin. Coins that term. Coins that term. You didn't turn that coin. He turned it out. She's like, Alexandra, what's her surname? When she came back to ITV, she'd spent the summer in LA

and she claimed to have brought the term elephant in the room. That was what it was. She had a single called Elephant in the Room or there was something like that. And she explained it on occasion this morning saying that she'd heard the term in America and she wanted to bring

it to the UK and she was going to be the first person to bring it to the UK I and that's what you were like with your lyrics

life's a bitch then you die because I haven't heard that before and I've also never heard laughter's the best medicine I made I made up

life's a bitch then you die that's what I'm saying and yes Alexandra I believe Alexandra Burke because she's a nice girl and I think if she

said she coined that term. I coined a term at the weekend. Oh yeah, what was it? You buy cheap, you buy, no, hold on. You buy,

why are our brains upside down? I coined a term this weekend, go on. I don't know if you've heard it, it's kind of trending. It's you buy cheap, you buy twice.

Oh, that's clever yeah thank you never heard of that before I just because I kept thinking about buying things for Black Friday I was like I could buy cheap but if I buy cheap

they probably won't last I'll buy again I said do you know what you buy cheap you buy twice do you know what I think that might take off I TM'd it then

all around the world that actually might take off yeah so Christmas gifts right obviously i've done all my christmas shopping except spencer because he's like he's really holding out and wanting a separate gift to what i want to give him which is my money back to me um but i was wondering like do you get anyone christmas gifts because like i haven't discussed what i'm getting you but i think i was gonna ask you because i know the person you are I was just going to say do you want to get each other

nothing for Christmas yeah yeah I thought that would be the case but I wondered do you get anyone at Christmas? No my mum I would and my nephew so I'm bringing her on holidays this year oh that's nice yeah I think we're going to Rome oh that would be nice yeah because you know the way we're obsessed with the

impending death of our mothers well I hadn't thought about that though oh this is my new thing it's every time now i'm just obsessed at my mother dying so i'm like how many christmas have left yeah so if she's annoying me like if she's you know she's you know she's irritating me i'm like joanne stop it because one day she won't be here she won't be here yeah that's my new thinking it's great it's really lovely to have that thought process constantly in your head anyway so I'm bringing it around

that's nice I said to my mum you know the way we did that in the pod a couple of weeks ago where I was like I'm really scared I saw Big Ben and like it might be

the last time I see him my mum mailed me and she's like imagine how I feel I was like Jesus you must be in bed you'd be terrified I'm like Sandra you're on the way small you'd be terrified I'm like Sandra

you're on the way out how does it feel what's the plan Sandra Sandra we're worried about you everything organized where are the actors what's going on

the actors are on my gaff I'm like mum do you want to start cleaning out the rooms now because it's going to be a big job for me and my brother you might as well help

I'm just saying like I even feel like that about my own personal items but like my dad left me with everything we had to end up we put it on facebook that's so grim i know but everyone like oh so because we were young when he died and we were like right we need to empty his house and we put it on facebook and all these people came but then some people started ripping like light things off the wall and we were like we were like you can't you can't rip the the lights off the wall And we were like What? We were like you can't rip the lights off the wall You can't do that

And they were like just grabbing everything Yeah It's so feral It was wild So someone's got a Vogue Williams hockey trophy in their house somewhere Yeah it all just disappears I know all I have is a pair of deck shoes I don't know got it in a house sale

Yeah We just went in and rinsed the place Don't do that I have is a pair of tech shoes Bob Williams I don't know God in a house sale Yeah Some lad died in a house We just went in Rinsed the place Don't do that I mean they will literally Rip fucking wallpaper Off the wall

I've never heard of an open house Was it kind of Were they buying it Or just No we just had to get rid of it Because like we had taken The things that we wanted That meant something to us

Oh yeah of course And then it was just like All extra stuff And we didn't own our own house Or anything like that So we didn't have anywhere To put it so we just invited the whole world over

to rip the place to shreds I do remember when my grandfather died we were all the grandchildren were let like into the house to just take

you know stuff for a centre I think I took his pipe stand which is still floating around somewhere oh that's a nice gift yeah and my granny I took this

kind of old leather folder and inside she'd all it was all her she'd written all kind of recipes and stuff yeah that was nice yeah and my granny I took this kind of old leather folder and inside she'd all it was all her she'd written all kind of recipes and stuff so that was nice

and I took a typewriter you're very good I'd be looking for the gold you're like plying the teeth out of their heads open wide granddad

before the rigor mortis sets in there's a gold tooth in there so here's a gold tooth give it to me I got my dad's wedding ring though

and Amber threw an absolute wobbler but like he was pissed one night and I was like I want that dad and he gave it to me when he was alive and then when he died

Amber was like I was like I'm so glad I had dad's ring and she threw a wobbler that's a big one to get though I know but we cut it in half so look I've got half and she's got the other

well I'm not happy about it but like at least I've got half and she's got the other well I'm not happy about it but like at least I've got half yeah but I deserve all of it give it back Amber yeah it is kind of grim

when you think about stuff like that but again it does need to be thought through mum if you're listening which I know you do even though you pretend

you don't Sandra I'm going to order some boxes let's just see how far we got over Christmas Sandra has over 250 hats what does Sandra, I'm going to order some boxes. Let's just see how far we get over Christmas. Sandra has over 250 hats. What does she think I'm going to do with them?

Mom, it's time to clear out. I'd be like, Sandra, you're getting buried in those hats. We're going to need an extra long coffin because you're going to have quite the head appendage.

And another one. And another one. And another one. Do you want me to tell Hugh when I see him what you think about him? Yeah. Okay, I might do that. Because I know he listens to the pot. Why don't you go... You tell me to stop talking about death

Sorry No I just meant yours Okay fine I wasn't talking about Oh my god We never spoke about this last week Go on

Paloma Faith Oh the breakup stuff So basically Paloma Faith Her husband This is what I'm gathering From the situation Allegedly Allegedly Allegedly Paloma Faith. Oh the breakup stuff. So basically Paloma Faith her husband this is what I'm gathering from the situation allegedly, allegedly, allegedly.

Yeah we don't know full details. Her marriage split up from the way she's talking I feel like she didn't want it to split up. That's the buzz I got from it. So she kind of wanted him back basically.

So she took out she's got an album out and she took out she rented a huge billboard because you can choose where your ads go and she rented a huge billboard because you can choose where your ads go. And she rented a huge billboard at the end of his road. It's amazing.

It's really smart. I think it's such a clever move. Yeah, it is. Also, it is. Let's, let's, let's not pretend it's not slightly psychotic. Ah, yeah, but I'd do that. Definitely. If I could do that, I would do that.

I would do it, but I'd go extra psychotic and I'd make someone call to his door and say it wasn't me or something do you know what I mean I'd need to have all my bases covered

oh there'd be some serious talking going on as well like 100% but I remember when I broke up from a long term relationship and we were discussing

this in Australia so my auntie took me to buy all new bras and knickers like she was setting me up for the next fella and I thought that's actually a lovely idea.

Thank you. That's your auntie saying, get your mojo back. Yeah. And get out there. And get out there. And like, pretend that you have a tit. Let's get this triple padded bra.

Yeah, exactly. And then somebody might catch your eye. I saw someone on TikTok, a woman on TikTok, she had these like... On TikTok? Were you looking at TikTok? No.

I've got an half price broadband like what the fuck am I supposed to do gotta use it she was having a huge big they looked amazing they looked so natural these

kind of implant like kind of like they oh the chicken fillets well their chicken their chicken fillets have really come on

oh they have yeah in our day they literally they'd be falling out and everything yeah these like kind of sandbags they literally they'd be falling out and everything yeah these like kind of

sandbags of flowers I'd just be falling apart like my tits would fall down out of my bra my hair extensions would come out because they were clippings I'd literally fall apart as the night went on

you were fake news fake news I was literally in bits fake news that's why when I was on the dating apps I never went really heavy on

the filtering on photos because I was like I don't want to turn up and look and see disappointment in their face. I'll save that for when they fucking get to know me. I don't want it on their face the second you walk up and they're like, oh, hold on. That's, you know what I mean? But I've met people's partners and like they've like I've seen them online I'm like oh my god like I'm never going on holidays with that person

in a million years and like I've met them and I'm like wait who is that who's this person I thought that you were going out with her and then it's like

oh no that is that person you want to look like what you would look like in real life but the photo is all it's the same with like when I go on a date with lads

you have to remind yourself that if they're hot in the photo you know that's the best best version of themselves

well you're not going to put an ugly picture up in fairness no you're not but they can be very misleading they really can and then you'll meet them and be like yeah that does look like you but there's you're not attractive at all

if you get me anyway it's not all about looks it actually isn't it's really not no it's not like look at Spencer. He's absolutely rotten. Yeah.

Well, everyone, that would be the end of our episode of My Therapist Goes. I mean, we were about to go on stage at the Three Arena for a second night.

I'm very excited, Joanne. I think that's why that we're, I think we're a bit feather-headed today. Excuse me? Is that what it's called? Yeah.

We're a bit like, kind of. I feel very warm in the face. Hmm. What's happening? Oh, actually, yeah, I think I am pissed. I'm pissed.

Are you pissed? I'm pissed. Oh my God. That's what it is. That is so funny that you don't even know the symptoms because it never happens to you.

You're like, oh, I can't drive. I'm in the river. What's happening? Oh my God, I'm pissed. That's hilarious. That's what's happened. Sorry, everyone, about that. I'm the opposite,

because I'm not really drinking at the moment. And I keep waking up and getting loads of life admin done. And you know the way I've had two phone bills For two years Because I haven't Wanted to ring the company Oh my god And because I'm not sure

I woke up And my mind is so clear It's crazy And Alan's like Your face is half the size Oh my god All the bloating is gone I can feel the face

Coming now That you're right It does Yeah We swap places I'm drinking heavy Joanna's not drinking so there you go

anyway look see you later life's a rollercoaster or a pleasurable fairground what did you what did you think it was pleasurable fairground it sounds like

a Julie Cooper novel Thank you.