NBC Nightly News with Tom Llamas - The Drink with Kate Snow: Dr. Ruth Westheimer

Episode Date: December 15, 2019

Dr. Ruth Westheimer is a world renowned sex therapist and former radio show host. First a sniper then a housemaid and now therapist, Dr. Ruth shares with Kate Snow the many turns her career took.

Hey everyone, this is Kate Snow. I sat down with world-renowned sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer. I learned Dr. Ruth has quite the resume. We talked about how the former sniper, yes, sniper, turned housemaid became the leading source on sex and sexuality over a glass of German wine called Gewürztraminer. This interview is part of my series, The Drink with Kate Snow. You'll find other conversations with changemakers of our time and how they became the leaders they are today at NBCNews.com slash the drink. It doesn't make people drunk. Unless they drink a whole bottle. Dr. Ruth, you are probably the world's best known expert on sex. How did you become that? Your drink is Gewürztraminer.

It's a kind of wine. Gewürztraminer. And it comes from Germany. You are German originally. I'm originally from Germany, but I'm an American of German Jewish background. I also have an Israeli background and I have a Jewish background. I also have an Israeli background and I have a French background. So I'm a big mixture. I even believe her sex life is going to be better

because she's going to be so pleased with her newfound freedom. Dr. Ruth, you are probably the world's best known expert on sex. How did you become that? Were you always curious as a child? Did you ask about taboo subjects when you were young? I grew up in Frankfurt, only child, and I was very curious. I knew when there was a book called About Sex on the top shelf. This is a book your parents had. That my parents had.

They didn't know that I climbed up on a chair. I was always small, short. And looked at that book called The Ideal Marriage by Van der Velde. But I didn't know I would be a sex expert. There's something brand new that nobody knows yet. Tell me. I'm getting an honorary doctorate this coming summer in Israel at Ben-Gurion University. Wow.

You lived in Israel for a time, after the war. I was a sniper, so watch what you're going to ask me. You were a sniper. I was a sniper, so watch what you're going to ask me. You were a sniper. I was fortunate. I've never killed anybody, but I could have if I needed to. You divorced shortly after coming to New York. You were a single mom. In Washington Heights, not in that apartment, another one. And I imagine you probably didn't have a whole lot of, you didn't have 40 books yet. Not only that.

You didn't have a whole lot of money. Not only that that i had very little money i made one dollar an hour as a maid because i had a certificate of the swiss wait wait dr ruth you were a maid yes a housemate i can still show you the diploma and i can come to your house and i can say here is my certificate as a housemaid, Swiss housemaid, but I don't do windows. Well, you have to draw the line somewhere. But I was very fortunate. And how did you get from a job as a maid to Planned Parenthood? Because that seems to be where you started really thinking about sex. I was at Cornell University Medical School being trained as a sex therapist.

I needed a job and Planned Parenthood offered me a position in research. First, I thought, these people are a little crazy. Something is wrong with them. I came home and I told my then-husband, Fred, and I said, something is wrong with these people. They don't talk about wine. They don't talk about restaurants. then husband Fred, and I said, something is wrong with these people. They don't talk about wine, they don't talk about restaurants, all they talk about is sex. 48 hours later, I thought, that's very interesting. And I worked for Planned Parenthood, I followed 2,000 women,

and they're contraceptive and abortive as boy. And then I did my doctoral dissertation with that data. Why is it that foreplay seems to be more important to women than men? That's a fantastic question and she's absolutely right. We're in New York right now. We're at Le Mone near Rockefeller Center. And I love Rockefeller Center because in that building,

30 Rockefeller Center, I did the radio program, W-Y-Y, sexually speaking, for 10 years. Sexually speaking, you're on the air. I didn't think

I would do radio. You can hear my accent. I thought there should be a program because we have the knowledge and radio people have the power of the airwaves. Did you think anyone would listen when they put you on the radio?

It happened very fast that everybody at NBC Radio, when I taped it, nobody worked. They're all... They would stop and listen to you? Right. They heard about orgasm and erection and all the things that I talked about. And look what happens. I did it every single Sunday for 10 years. Live?

Live, right here. 30 Rockefeller Plaza on the eighth floor. My late husband went with me despite the fact that he was an engineer and he had to get up the next morning early and tell her that she doesn't have to do it every single time but that from time to time you would like her to take the initiative okay okay good luck to you I have to tell you something I was a teenager in the 80s of every week I don't know if my parents even know. I don't know that they do to this day. But I used to listen.

How fortunate. Walkman came on the market. And you were willing to do things, to talk about things that no one else was willing to talk about at that time. Yes. Why? I knew that there is a lot of knowledge that is around, but doesn't get to young people, for example. There is a myth that women don't need sex.

Nonsense, of course they need sex. Look at your smile. So here's the proof. I'm gonna have a sip of Gewurztraminer. You're adorable, Dr. Ruth, but I was wondering, when you first started going public with this, did you get a lot of opposition from people? No, I did not, and the first one who was surprised about it was me.

But I think part of it is because we are talking in such an open way, and it's based on good scientific facts. Do people still stop you now and ask you sex questions? Yes. All the time? Even at the restaurant. But I said, today I have no time. I said, I have to talk to Kate Snow, and I have no time.

And another time. Do people often come up to you and say, you saved my life? All the time. And it makes me feel very good. Even if they ask me a question that I've answered 25,000 times, I still take it very seriously. I'm not bored yet.

If I become bored, I'll stop it. What is the weirdest thing about you? Weird about me? There's nothing weird. Next question. What was the biggest obstacle you ever faced becoming who you are? Then I have to say in a very sad voice,

and that of becoming an orphan is no fun. Your parents died in the Holocaust. Right, my whole family. Most frequent question you get. There was a time that I did get a lot of questions from men about premature ejaculation, and women who did not know how to have an orgasm. Now you have ejaculation and orgasm on your program.

There we go. Both those words. Thank you. What is the one piece of advice you wish you had gotten when you were young? I would have liked very much to know not to worry so much that no man would ever be interested in me because I'm so short. They should have told me right away that I'll get married three times. Three times? Three. That the last marriage was the longest, almost 40 years. What advice do you give to young people?

Make sure that if you find somebody that you can cultivate the relationship, that you have somebody that when you come home, that person smiles. It's very important to say, to work on the relationship, not to take anything for granted. And they should smile when you walk in the door. Yes.

Dr. Ruth. Thank you. To your health. Thank you.