Nerd Poker - Episode 57 - Haushucks

Episode Date: February 25, 2020

Down the dark stair the Ice Five tread, towards the teleportation circle that will transport them to Donkeyland. But what are dark stairs without a whole bunch of traps? Luckily the Ice Five have a cuckoo bird and a lil' boss to help with such things, but will Queep and Gus' wings be able to take the party past every horror ahead?

hey everybody we want to congratulate this month's winner of our top tier patreon drawing thank you tiktok is a murder monster thank you tiktok is a murder monster you've won this month's drawing uh thanks for supporting us thanks Hey everybody, I'm Brian Poussin. Comedian, writer, actor, nerd. I've been playing D&D with my friends for a long time. I decided to do a new podcast where we play Dungeons & Dragons in my very own dining room with my wife kid and my noisy dogs so meet my friends Sarah, Kev, Dan, Blaine, Chris now

it's time for another episode of Brian Poussaint's Nerd Poker. Season three. Hey, everybody. It's Brian Poussaint, and you're listening to Brian Poussaint's Nerd Poker, episode 57. Hello, friends. My friends are here. Chris.

Hello. Sarah. Yo. Ken. Hi. Dan. Heya. Blaine. Blaine Yo. Ken. Hi. Dan. Heya. Blaine.

Blaine's not here. It's me, Pop'ems. It's the box of Entenmann Pop'ems. And then at the end of the table, Sam. Hi, everyone. Wearing a Billy Joel shirt, and we still like him. That's how likable Sam is. He had to be a big shot, didn't he? He had to prove it to the crowd. He had to be a big shot, didn't he?

He had to prove it to the crowd. He had to be a big shot, didn't he? All his friends were so knocked out. He had to have the last word last night. So much fun to be around. Oh my God. How more fun than those Rock and Rollers or Cola Wars

of which I cannot take anymore. We would like to thank some Patreon supporters. Yeah, you should do that. They make Nerd Poker possible. And you can join them by going to patreon.com slash nerdpoker and getting bonus episodes every month. They go by names like Cale. Wait, we've been having some of the best bonus episodes lately.

Holy shit, Brian. I feel like some of the guests that we've had lately. Like your Paul F. Tompkins, your Padgett Brewsters. Yes, Kevin Sussman was super fun. Padgett was amazing. I like how she would roll the dice and then she would count it up in French because her character was French.

Oh, c'est, oh, c'est le weeper. She was fully a character. Rhodes loved hearing this French voice yelling from the other room. Did he love how she was yelling about BDSM? He didn't get some of the things she was yelling, but he really enjoyed it.

If my kid enjoys it from the other room, you should check it out. And guess who's been checking it out? Folks who are at the Patreon level known as Stargoyle and above. They go by names like Kaylee McPhail. Thank you.

Thank you, Yukon Cornaglia. Here we go for the second one. Yukon Cornaglia. Thanks. Thanks, Alvin Sal. Thanks, The Collective Farts Blamed on Brian. Thanks, Jack Watkins. Thanks, Eric Gage.

Thanks, Jason Sprouse. Thanks, Daniel Schlegel. Thank you. Thank you, Hamlet423. Thank you. Thank you,legel. Thank you. Thank you. Hamlet four, two, three. Thank you. Thank you. Casey Baker. Thank you.

Thank you. Jerry come squash, AKA mummified Twinkie cream. Hooray. Well done. Thanks. Thank you. Bye.

Flirts with death. Uh, thank you. Via Devona up your rock. Thank you. Elzid Falcon. Crows. Narl toe.

Thank you. Man. Love for Tallman. Oh, thank you. J. R. Schrager. Thank you. Eric Farmer. Thank you, Elzid Falcon Crow's Gnarled Toe. Thank you, Man Love for Tallman. Uh-oh. Thank you, J.R. Schraer. Thank you, Eric Farmer. Thank you, Palom. Thanks, Dice Goblin.

Thanks, all things that make Bodhi Goat you. Thank you, Broken Pine Glass. And most of all, thank you, That Levitating Mall Santa. You guys got murdered at the Galleria. Oh, damn. Way back. I love Dice Goblin. I want to hear more of that oh hickory dickory botch the mouse ran on my crotch uh oh 3d uh hit dice mouse so i would like to just if i may segue into What happened last time on Brian Possehn's Nerd Poker?

The Ice Five are getting quite close to Donkey Land. All they need to do is cross an immense cavern that separates the halfling country from the rest of Cloddenheim. The abyss is so great, the only way they know a cross, other than perhaps a foolhardy series of flights being carried by a queep, which would for sure end in some deaths, that would be really funny, is a teleportation circle at the bottom of a cave at the edge of the chasm. After avoiding some very creepy watcher-type giants above ground they headed below encountered a little trap on the staircase and now they head deep into some drowish tunnels here we go so uh you're all at this point deep deep deep beneath we leveled up too you did and in fact uh i thought of what i think is a fun

thing to do first of all i want to congratulate the entire cast, all five of you on leveling up your characters without making me do it for you or coming to your house or taking a lift down to Los Feliz to be playing in his child. Like I did last time. I think I did good. I'm level a million. You are a level seven.. You are level seven.

You're all level seven. And what I want to do is not like get too into it, but give you guys a chance, especially to reward you for having done this on yourselves. Tell us a little bit how I might tell

maybe just your hit points if what they're at currently or you could tell the listeners some of your abilities. They would find that exciting. But hey, Chris. Hey, Dan. What was leveling up like for you? it was very exciting because at level seven some cool features for my

class i'm an arcane archer a class of fighter and so i picked up a couple things one of them is a magic arrow from now on whenever i fire an arrow i can automatically make it magic just so as to be able to, if anything has a defense, that means it can only be hurt by magic. Now all my arrows can pierce that, which is great. Oh, that's awesome.

And then the other thing is I have a thing called curving shot, which is if I miss with a hit, if there's another enemy within 60 feet, I can through magical communication, make the arrow fire at any other target. A boomerang? Kind of. Yeah.

The boomerang rang. So that's kind of cool. That's very cool. And if I'd like to ask everybody this, what is your current armor class and max hit points? My armor class is 18, but I can move it up one more to 19 if I go heavy. And then my maximum hit points are 68 nice all right hey

sarah how did leveling up go for you um it went okay um this was um this was not as exciting a level up as some others but it was it had some some highlights uh my max hp is now 40 i don't think my ac changed actually it's 17 um i like to check in on these two things but the thing that i'm the most excited about is a new spell that i have called banishment where i can i can attempt to send a creature to another plane of existence like southwest well it could be temporary right but then if they are safe from another plane it depends on whether native to the plane or not but yeah it seems like a fun uh a fun spell that i that i picked out just you know just for funsies for me i love that one

uh so that's what that's the that was the highlight for me of the level up dope hey uh ken yeah uh i got some more hit points. I'm up to 71. And now I have advantage to my initiative roll. Awesome. That's very handy. I'm still bad at carrying people. I'm trying to do a little bit of

checking in on everybody. I got a little chart to keep track of everybody's levels. What's your initiative bonus now? Because you're sort of the team tank. Plus two. Plus two. Interesting. With advantage. Oh, shit. Hand line went up. Yeah. And hey, Queep, what's your current AC?

16. We do need to get that up, I think, if I was your teammate. I would say that to you. Does it go up? I mean, yeah, we could find you some more armor, right? Like there's a few things you can do, but because you're the tank, you want to be a little harder to hit.

It's not necessarily easiest to raise a tank's AC, right? Like it makes sense that other characters would get it higher first. Isn't there a barbarian thing? If you don't wear armor, then your AC is based off some other factor? I mean, we're definitely going to have some listeners let us know.

We'll find out. Oh, sorry. But we can look it up during the break too yeah um i think that would be smart hey uh brian what how did leveling up go for you i don't i don't think i went up in ac that's fine i mean yeah you necessarily wouldn't i'm just checking in with you so the listeners know what your ac is because i think that comes up would it have had like a plus sign or something next to it or no it's just just just to check in with you on ac that's all i'm doing with everybody um i actually had not been online for a while so but your ac is 15 right yeah okay um but uh so i had i did two rolls on the hit points okay and uh yeah, you didn't do it last level. Yeah.

So the max HP is... What I rolled was 74, but the max HP is 88, like it adds to it. So that's what it is, 88. And my initiative is plus eight. Nice. Jesus.

Yeah, that's crazy. Hey, Blaine. And then I didn't see any other things saying if I got any other powers or abilities or anything we can check in on that in the break too just to make sure you're not missing out on a feat or something like that yep hey Dr. Uwud

well my armor class is 13 my initiative is plus 3 I have 52 max hit points my proficiencies of animal handling My initiative is plus three. I have 52 max hit points. My proficiencies of animal handling in Arcana have gone up to seven and six, respectively, which means I can talk to the animals like that movie with Robert Downey Jr. What's it called?

Iron Man. Yeah. And I also got back in touch with my estranged brother for a while. Hey. Nice. And also I got a crocus tramp stamp and you know um since i i heard what a bunch of people got uh first of all did there any other abilities you want to talk about don't mean interrupt or no i don't think no i think that's jumped on your uh no no i'm uh uh i'm just uh still trying to deal with the legal Byzantine stuff of getting my tenure.

It's kind of a pain, right? So frustrating. It's been especially hard since the apocalypse happened in this world. All right. Everyone else said it. So the two people who didn't. Halseen and TikTok, what's your bonus to initiative? I'm plus nine.

Jesus. Oh, boy, oh, boy. Hey, archers get some better fun shit. initiative. I'm plus nine. Jesus. Boy, oh boy. Archers get some fun shit. Yours is still very good, Brian. Mine is, I guess, same as it ever was, which is... Same as it ever was. I took a feat.

That's how I got mine. Guess you say. What was that leveling up? What was that what was that leveling up uh what was that level seven brought to us by uh mr i was brought to you by february of the month club

uh coming up next april february of the month are you sure i guess last month february of the month. Are you sure? I guess last month's February of the month. It was March. That's my head. Last month was, last month I think it was August.

Okay. God, I just love the surprise. Every month you never know what you're going to get. You never know what month it's going to be. For February of the month. It's really amazing. It's really surprising. And the months are fresh when they get there.

It's weird. You would think that they would spoil. I feel like the ice packs always melt though by the time they get there. It's weird. You would think that they would spoil. I feel like the ice packs always melt, though, by the time they get there. No, they have some sort of weird chemical thing. But it keeps the months really fresh. I like to open the box and let it sit on the back porch for a while and just kind of breathe a little bit. That's very good. It really just opens the stuff up a little bit.

My kids love it. My dog gets into it, though, sometimes and ruins it, like runs around with it the month in its mouth oh my god i could i couldn't find april for like three februaries of the month we should play dungeons and dragons why because my nose is bleeding from the logic of this bit uh yeah you guys pre-paid call-in show that was your third mistake dan i'm sweating uh just enjoy the sketch. What feels, at least to you guys, because you just encountered a trap, kind of like a

sneaky attempt. So why don't we go ahead and establish what our sort of marching order is. Don't mind these extra halfling NPCs I have. Don't you mean your Apriling orders? Brian just punched Blaine in the face take him outside and kill him what order are you going in

Hoshinka would offer to go up near the front because she's been reading some sort of violet fang coded messages on the wall but I would assume Darkthor might want to also do you want to go get grab Darkthor the rest of you guys if you could scoot

maybe on behalf of Chris because he's a little far away or something get him in there yeah and i'll have back sure i'll have and maybe gus will can like curl up on my shoulder or something like that sure uh so gus look if you could just scoot him next to tiktok blaine thank you very much uh creep where do you want to be i kind of move that's fine there behind hoshenka sure before we go any further do we need to talk to hoshenka for a sec about what i mean she's just sort of humming a sort of donkey land uh traditional song to herself right now it's the theme from he all well not in a bad way i'm just saying seeing as we're in like potentially definitely violet fang area in case we're about to stumble upon them and she has this connection with them is there

anything we need to square away as far as like us being pals and like if she needs a signal why again is she called the violet fang um you haven't really asked that question oh i asked she's gone. Daddy gone. Love is gone. It occurred to me when it sounded like you were saying the violent fang. And then I was like, wait, why is she the violent fang? Hey, well, while we're having this little thing, I'll tell Gus just to be on actually maybe up by Hashinka and just kind of

watch ahead. Like he can just sort of not necessarily scalp, but he can stand watch while we have this conversation. Does that make sense? Great. So yeah. Hashinka says, oh, is it, it's actually. and stand watch while we have this conversation does that make sense great uh so yeah hoshinka says oh is it it's actually uh this one yeah you we're going this way so if you want to be in the front you can scoot your mini in front of uh maybe so then yeah kind of maybe next to creep great

um oh you didn't have your dice tray either brian we got to get you started we had too much fun talking before the episode we distracted you uh yeah so uh she says it's actually got something to do with the fact she can change the color of her skin as some sort of interplanar being i uh part of why i i've heard these rumors i think that she is not a real drow even though though she appears to be a drow. Perhaps she is just some shapeshifter. That is a rumor I could get behind. Yeah. Wait a minute. Dan. Guys.

What's happening? Is she, was she, have you seen her before? Have I seen her before? Yes. Have you? No.

But, okay. So she can change her color, but she's called Violet Fang? Yes. Well, because are we not familiar, not these characters, but with a purple drow-like lady named Zinzerina?

Zinzerina? Hey, everybody, do an insight check. What? Come on. 18. 13. Are you? Yeah, OK.

OK. I feel like someone said this. If somebody if somebody beats a 20, I will let you do a second roll. It was an insight. Yeah, I got a 14. Come on, Brian. Eight. Oh, creep. I'm Brian. Eight. Oh, queep.

I'm sorry. No. No? Nobody? No, I mean, Dr. Uwe, you definitely get like a twinge if this means something. I'm going to carve the devil's tower

out of my mashed potatoes. You brought up the moon elf, lunar elf, but he's like, no, it's not the same thing because the lunar elves and moon elves were different. They are different.

Then I was like, oh, no, that's not. 20. And somebody had said that. I feel like, oh, no, that's not. 20. And somebody had said that. I feel like somebody said that. He got an 18. On Twitter or something. Somebody was like, oh, the lunar elves and moon elves.

But then I just wrote it off. Oh, right. Like you have like a. This is all in it. OK. I can confirm one thing. What can you confirm? Yes.

Someone did ask about that. I think it was in maybe even the Patreon comments. There's moon elves, which are canon in Dungeons and Dragons. And then I made up the lunar elves, which are like a pale Lord of the Rings golem-like kind of elf that worships Zinzerina. Right. That's why I thought they were different. Because we had asked about a lunar elf situation here at some point.

Yeah, just a little while ago. And then I feel like we wrote it off. I had heard about moon elves for the very first time. But those are not lunar elves. What's this? Moon elves and lunar elves, those are different? They have a sneaky smile. Are those the same?

No, the moon elves who were of Klottenheim, they were kind of surface-dwelling elves. They were not drowsy. They were more closely in contact with the, you know, the sun elves of which you are familiar. Oh, yeah. All right. So just,

I do not know these lunar elves. Let's say around the corner, we run into Violet Fang and all of a sudden we're talking to Violet Fang. Do we need a plan here? Yes. I think that is a good idea. Well, I mean you know she has a compound within

the city of Clompety now I'm really thinking about this because you had said that she I think we were thinking she was like bad because she had sent assassins but then when we talked a couple episodes

ago he had said oh no she's actually never been known to do anything yeah no that's what i mean we just i just before we run into forces and maybe can't have a private conversation but so i think what we had talked about was that we actually have helped her because we actually killed the i know dan's acting very weird um this is hashinka humming the donkey land donkey what is that what is that song it is called uh donkey love it's driving me mad making me crazy crazy how does it go again are we in tijuana i can sing the full lyrics for you if you want it It will take me a moment to recall, but I do have them somewhere. No, this is not to the

tune of the Mr. T experience as a song was in the last campaign. Now, this is a traditional halfling song about Donkey Land. Okay, well, now we need to hear it. Darthur, do you know about any of this stuff? Wait, don't you want to hear Dan's dancing? I do. I gotta look this up. Well, he looks it up, but we can ask Darthur.

Are you familiar with any of this stuff? I don't know. Am I? Let's see. It is, I will say, it is elves. I will let you do a history check. Very. Natural 20. Hey!

Okay, let's see. Before I have to sing a song i i uh in a french accent um what should i here i'll look that up too you hear the violet thing you hear about how the violet thing is like this interplanar drow elf um you have heard of drow in the underdark via religion via lulz who's sort of the main demon spider goddess and stuff like that uh there has been interplanal interplanar travel in the underdark where drow are from and you have you think you've heard of uh drow that can change

their color specifically but that they are a kind of drow but they're very rare kind of drow from another plane of existence right okay so maybe it's not zinzerina or maybe it is everybody stare at dan until he cracks didn't work uncrackable yeah he's gonna sing the lyrics to the song fuck you remembered okay uh all right well i guess here's here's the song donkey love uh that she's been singing oh hey oh ho the donkey waters flows through mountain streams it splashes gleams my donkey feelings grow goodbye sweet dove don war boots and. My battle donkey bears her teeth. That lurking horror is underneath this donkey land I love. Hee-hay, hee-haw, into the gaping maw.

I trot and stomp, clip-clipity-clomp. Our end I nearly saw. That is Donkey Love. Ooh, weird. It's one of those songs that doesn't even say the title in the song. Yeah, like tequila. I don't say Donkey Love once. No, but tequila says it.

Oh, right. It is, in fact, the only thing it says. Oh, right. I was thinking of something else. Unless you count ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha as a word. I don't. You're pretty deep in the caves now we can go into this then thinking perhaps she's an ally

I mean I guess I don't none of us got the insight and none of us know so this is more of a player situation in terms of I gave you as much as I could with that history check from the one thinking that it might be connected to somehow to yeah that's exciting um previous campaigns yeah to previous campaigns maybe there's gaga somewhere flying around well that's true so who knows who knows uh but i think oh what i was

gonna say is that i think we did talk about that if we see her we have kind of a like a i don't know what the word i'm looking for is i'm'm sorry. I'm very tired. But it's a we killed Dralana. Sorry. Right. Which she was trying to do. So then that might be a point in our favor. So we have sort of an intro card. That's it. Great. Yes, my mission is complete. So even

though I have not had direct conflict excuse me contact this Violet Fang. I am reporting on business so i have gone missing in action but i think she will be happy to hear okay so if we come upon her then we are all right we have a bargaining chip or at least a piece of good news thank you that was a better way to do it all right you head farther uh down and it's unclear how long you have to keep going.

But boy, oh boy, you start to get tired. A few hours go by. There's some minor traps that easily Hoshinka spots through the sort of violet fan cant written on the walls. And you guys don't have to roll for it or anything. Just like basic kind of shit. But yeah, you guys are about to suffer. kind of shit um and uh but yeah you guys are about to suffer we'll just say either point of exhaustion or you would just naturally need to break because you've the tunnels are going down so far all right is there a place for us to rest you're in a wide sort of obsidian stone staircase

that seems to just go on almost infinitely um i can uh say it seems possible to set up camp it'd be a little uncomfortable because the steps aren't that wide you could fit your whole body on it but you'd feel like maybe you'd roll over unless you secured yourself a little bit so that seems fun let's like line up on the steps laying down yeah okay that is a choice you are good to make yes let's do it sure all right well why don't you all just uh do a group survival check to make sure nobody botches. And rolls over and starts a cascade of rolling bodies. I mean, we cover ourselves in butter first, right?

Sorry, what was the check? Survival. 21. 17. Remember, I have that amulet. Yeah, well, you have a really high bonus but if you bought you botch so i guess it almost doesn't matter your bonus i'm just making everybody roll a 20 set of dice to see if you fall down some stairs for no ones you're fine did you get a one though and

plus three no almost all right well All right. Well, you guys. Yeah, nice. You're all pretty safe, although several points. Stay on that stair. Queep kind of like your wings knock you over. I've got a lot of stuff going on. Oh, are you having a nightmare? You just have, you know, the wings and the tail feathers and all that shit.

It really gets in the way. Do you like having you sleep like you're flying? I don't have a perch. Try shaking your tail feather. Oh. We have to cover his cage. Oh, yeah. Just try.

Throw a blanket over his head. Take the mirror out. And yeah, you know, do you like, do you maybe snore? Maybe that's what wakes you up and kind of makes you like a little bird snore or something.

Sam, we're resting. I know you love it when we rest. It's so funny. And this time it's taking a long time, yeah all right uh it's part of the game yeah uh you tell me mr uh watch man yep are you gonna uh have your little wing and friend do any uh yeah well i mean he can watch he can watch one direction i can watch the other okay roll a perception check for uh that harry star for him and me for for both of you um and i'm gonna need this is a you're doing a long rest everybody right like you're gonna get a full night's sleep so this is only eight hours because i don't think

any of you have to relearn spells right yeah we're rested so we're not gonna okay just two rounds and uh do a stealth check each time for gus okay okay so first for me this is Perception. That's a 21. And for him it's a natural 20 plus 3. Jesus. So that's the Perception. And then his Stealth for the first one

is 20. Beautiful rolls. And you hear from Gus during the first four hours that he spots what seems to be a translucent jellyfish-like creature far

up the stairs, kind of hovering and then retreating a little bit. He tries to chase it a little bit without getting spotted, but it very quickly flits back up the stairs. Seems like it's maybe tracing a guy out of town. I don't like it. Is that the...

What's his name? It's a flump. It's a flump. It's Archmage of Vanduul. Yeah, boss! It's one of those guys! Should we pull him up on the talkie? Yeah, but don't you want... Let's finish the rest first. Yeah, you're still halfway through your... Yeah, I don't think I... Just knowing it's

there, I'm like, yeah, he's's still there you don't want to sleep talking him he's not attuned he couldn't do it himself yeah uh why don't you roll one more time those same deal okay so so perception and you don't notice anything but it's something gus has to spot by you feel like you're probably gonna so perception for me is a 21 uh perception for him is uh 20 okay and then stealth i was wrong he does him no wait i'm wrong uh stealth is a 21 all right this time gus doesn't spot anything but you feel like there's something weird about 10 stairwell steps down from where you guys are right now by weird you mean a feeling somebody took a a shit. When you stare at, it looks like someone just took a big old shit

on the stairs. Dark, sir. We are guests here. No, the stare, when you look at it, it almost seems to, like the line of the stare, like you just are like trying to keep an eye out. Everything's so quiet for hours.

It just looks like it's a little blurry. Almost like it's just not the same, like clear line as the rest of the stairs. Interesting. Okay. And yeah, it's a little blurry. Almost like it's just not the same clear line as the rest of the stairs. Interesting. Okay. And yeah, it's farish down. You guys would only have hit it if, say, you rolled or walked the next day without paying attention. But everybody else can get up now.

You're fully healed. Should we do like a quarterstaff thing and see if there's like some sort of, if it's a pit? Also, do you want to talk about do you want to do with that first do you want to figure out the flump archmage of vanjervale first wait because we have to do both uh either or should we call him okay i mean what would we say that's what i'm wondering. Back off your flump? Well, what we know now basically is he will follow us until something. We can check in with him and make him feel like we're trying to be buddies. Yeah, so we call him and we're like, take a picture.

It'll last longer. I mean, no, no. We're like. Go flump yourself. Yeah, go flump yourself. Something similar. Yeah, what do we want to say? Flump off.

Well, don't we need to back and forth? Say that to him and see what he says back. Which one? Flump away. So you pick up the Rocky Talkie. Rocky Talkie. You know what you're doing. Get him.

You're just thinking about this, Sarah? Yeah. Back your flump up. I need to keep an eye on you. What do you think, Dark Ther? I don't like it. You need an attitude adjustment. See me soon or i'll find you and bring you to me he's wasting words again he's really bad at this he's almost out yeah

he's really bad why wouldn't he just talk to us wherever he came fucker seems like an extra step i'll come get you and then bring you back here like why wouldn't he just talk to us wherever he came? You fucker, Sarah. Seems like an extra step. I'll come get you and then bring you back here? Like, why can't we just talk anywhere? Sounds like a threat from my dad. He wants us to bring the artifacts, right? That was the deal. Oh, yeah. So, I mean, should we be killing his spies?

Well, sure. But, I mean, as soon as they see us, as soon as we know they're there real action item for me if you start doing that sounds real fun to me i mean it feels to me like we should i mean just kill the flumps i mean what what is the uh the nature dan of a flump like am i gonna feel guilt if i murder a spying flump or great question let's have you do a feelings check how about uh let's what is that that's like a straight charisma i think sarah you've got a negative three for feelings like am i allowed to yeah what beings am i you know i'll let you check i will let you pick actually you can either do

because they're kind of magical beings you can do in our canary history like an ethical yeah uh again i have proficiency in both so i will do uh either one well that's a good thing i have advantage on that because uh 17 they when you fought them uh they they seem to be rather upbeat and cheery in nature and it was a little sad when they got killed and there's something strange about just how different they are from the archmage himself who seems kind of insidious so damn it yeah i think they're supposed to be like harmless creatures right okay so now it's time let's try to capture one okay oh yeah yeah all right i'll tell that to hey next time you see one pal yeah you want me to look now oh yeah see if he's still around yeah

go do a do a give him another stealth and perception he'll go fly back up the stairs and try and find a flump okay you want me to go past our connection barrier just to make sure um sure all right uh that's a actually yeah okay 14 for perception stealth uh 22 so uh he hits the entity because of that role he says all right i'm not i'm not finding anything i gotta go farther up the stairs if you want me to find one let's just keep going yeah okay he'll probably catch up to us again because and because the doctor's got an idea about that stair okay yeah let's just go up and uh yeah he would have to leave i mean you said you would have him do it

but he's just warning you basically that you'd have to roll again let's just move on the blurry stair was below us yeah below us like in front of you in front of us i say you're descending it was it was 10 stairs ahead of us ask kalshinka first because she knows the drow stuff right i have not seen anything nor looking at the walls now do i i mean i will do a quick perception check not a very high roll so i will tell you i do my best but i do not see anything other than uh see stairs and i i will not step on the one you pointed out to me but i do not see this blur you see it's almost as though like it could be like an illusion or something i think the only reason i even notice is because i was staring at it for so long correct do you have detect magic you do

feel that way too i do have detect magic maybe you could try that on the stair. I will throw up a detect magic. All right. This stair has a golden aura. It is very intense. And it actually seems to cascade like the aura dims, but continues for a few stairs after this. And the golden aura means what? You're not sure.

I mean, it's magic. It's magic. A lot of the things you've used, I will just say, retroactively, it's like a golden arrow when things are magic. mean, it's magic. It's magic. A lot of the things you've used, I will just say, retroactively, it's like a golden arrow when things are magic. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Do we have like an unseen servant?

Oh, yeah, we do have an unseen servant. So we have a mage hand? Oh, that was a pageant. Yeah, the mage hand. Pageant Brewster, ladies and gentlemen. Listen to her use her mage hand in the bonus episode. Prance that servant down.

Yeah, I'm going to... Send him to a certain death. I'm going to ask Jeeves. Should we back up a touch? Let's say it is magical. Let's say it has a bit of a range. Maybe we should back our flumps up? Yeah, maybe we should do that. More than

30 feet. Okay. Alright. We do so. And you're just going to send this unseen servant to just walk as if nothing's going wrong like onto the stairs. Yeah. I want him to descend grandly as if entering a ball. Oh. Okay. I want him to go. I'm thinking maybe he goes

down the stairs sort of like the Beatles when they're doing Your Mother Should Know. I like Jerry Lewis and Cinderfella. No more like the Beatles. Or like Sid doing Flavin or Joaquin and the Joker

yeah yeah yeah or Father Mary hey that song should never be used again or that meme of Jason falling down the stairs that's actually not him

but they played it so you Or that meme of Jason DeBruyllo falling down the stairs. It's actually not him. Oh, the Gary Glitter thing? Yeah. But they played it. Yeah, fuck Gary Glitter. So you send him downstairs. And does he have a secondary mission or is he just going to keep going? Because he won't automatically be able to tell you

unless you don't see him. You just can sense his responses to things. I'm going to just say, hey, just head down the stairs and see what you can see. You get this sort of, you know, nonverbal acknowledgement and

you assume he heads down and you don't hear from him again. That was great. I guess he's, as you said, we don't see him, but I guess he's unseen, so that's the way. Does he no longer exist? Here, let don't see him, but I guess he's unseen. So that's the. Wait, does he no longer exist? Here, let me, let me put this up here and then take it right away.

Now, to be clear, you can summon him again and have him say carry something and then you'll get a visual cue. Oh. But you can't see what's happening. Thank you, Dan. I'm going to call him back and I'm going to give him. Nonverbal acknowledgement of being called back. I'm going to give him a pop him. A good very being called back. I'm going to give him a pop-em.

A goodberry? Yeah, and maybe if we could put some fairy fire. Doesn't anybody have fairy fire? Put fairy fire on the... Oh, that's true. You can cast it on the Unseen Servant, so he'll glow. Darkthir, you have fairy fire.

Unseen Servant. Yeah, you've got your Unseen Servant mini, right? This will be fun. I'm going to set it on fire. He's down here, I right so he's gonna just start and you throw a glow on him what color does that smells terrible for funsies he's gonna head down the stairs okay what color you want blue green or purple glow on this uh unseen servant what color you want to be him to be? Purple. Okay, my son.

So he starts heading down all purple. And when his foot, and he's holding a Goodberry? A donut? Yeah, he's holding a little pop-up. A donut-themed Goodberry? Yeah. I'll just say you can do that.

The second his foot hits the stairs, you don't see anything happen. As he continues, you can all see, as if he is like becoming pixelated. Just his particles continue to start spreading away from him as he goes farther. And it looks like he's still walking. It's like watching a film where the projector is slowly getting distorted. You just see all the little purple dots go farther and farther until it looks like just bouncing purple dots descending something in the distance.

And then they just slowly disappear. So smash that mini with a hammer. And you don't obviously hear from him again. Take him away. Back in the backpack. Does anyone have fixed stairs? I don't know how to do

that. But I mean mean does it feel like we could get over it you know like is it but then you say it was multiple stairs i do think it might be of us yes throwing something over the stairs and seeing maybe i could fly some rope past it well yeah let's just start by throwing is is there oh can you take an arrow and tie a rope to that maybe over the top and see if that. Because then the rope would actually tell us where the actual top of this thing is. Okay. So you just tie a rope to an arrow and just try to fire down the thing as you can.

Yeah, but I think ultimately my goal would be rather than go for as far as possible to get clearly past the stairs and trying to lodge into something. To the wall or the ceiling? To the ceiling. Is that what we're saying? We'll call this an athletics check to try to hit as high as you can, as far as you can. 23.

Great. You let it fly. As it goes over the stair, nothing happens. It doesn't dissipate. You can all clearly see it. And it goes into a wall and sticks. So it's the stairs. You wait about a minute.

Seems fine. There's also the risk of it being like an organic or an alive thing, right? Yeah. It's magic though, right? True. Are these spiral though, right? True. Are these spiral stairs, straight stairs? They're very slow spiral, yeah. Okay, so there's a center to it.

Can we go over the edge down to the lower stairs? Yeah, is there a lower flight? Is there an opening? It looks like that sort of, when you did detect magic, the glow kind of goes down like at least another 10 stairs and then it sort of looks like normal stairs ish but it's like a very slow gradient it's like very unusual i think he's saying that it goes all the way it makes a full circle so we wouldn't be able to just drop down i can't it out. It feels like there's still a magic aura on additional steps after that blurry step. Spiral.

Do a, um, tick tock while we're talking. Do an insight check for me. Insight. Insight, yeah. But there's no opening

to a central. Yeah, there's no opening though. Oh, got it. 12. No spot in the middle, you mean?

I guess it's just like a, you feel like you could get Gus to do something. Gus, can I get you to do something? What do you want me to do, boss? You didn't roll high enough for your dungeon master to give you a clear idea of what I could do,

but you definitely feel like I could do something. I mean, it seems like the next thing would be to see if he can go... I look for a rat. Yeah, we got to find... Awesome, do a nature check. Love it. Weird request. I am into it. well i i only got a seven but you

blew it i loved it though someone else perhaps can find a rat i can do you can all do a nature check to look for rats if anyone wants to look for a rat i just botched looking for a rat do you have a do you have but do you have um you might have a an um, you might have a, an animal summoning. I have a, uh, animal handling of seven. Are you proficient? Are you proficient in nature? Uh, I'm not proficient in nature.

I'm proficient in animal handling. Oh, so if you found one, you could get it to maybe do something. No, but I botched finding a rat, which, which meant that I found a,

uh, everyone look for rats or an animal that we can throw. Brian's drawing some heavy metal logos. Okay. Let's see if some heavy metal logos. Okay. Let's see if Gus can find something. Ooh. Yeah, you can roll for Gus. I'll allow it.

He's gonna believe nature's wisdom? It's intelligence. Oh, okay. I'm smart. He got a six. We're not gonna find no rats. No, you guys just can't find Oh, you know, if I can roll for your NPC. Nash, you didn't roll great. No, you're just looking around.

Queep, can you lay an egg? Yeah. And then what? Murder his egg? Well, I mean... Squeeze something out of your cloaca, bird man. Feels like this is getting a little longer than it needs to be. So maybe let's.

Maybe. You're definitely taking your time with it. I've enjoyed just the foreboding nature. Whoever can fly, which is a couple of us, maybe should just try to. Yeah, that's a good call. Fly over the stairs, right? Yeah. All right.

Queep, is that a yay like you're going to do it? Yeah. Sweet. So you fly over. Be careful not to disintegrate. I'm going to fly high. Don't do it. Don't do it. So again, you disintegrate. Dr dr wood would have told you that it's like a 10 stair

gradient of this how how far are you going to go before you do anything besides fly just going to fly and land are you going to fly and test it what are you going to do i'm going to fly uh until i can't oh i can't see the goal he can tell you i'm going to fly about 15 steps down. And then you're going to touch down? And then I'm going to pluck one of my feathers and drop it. Nice. Ooh. You fly about 15, what, like 30 feet up? The ceiling's higher. Yeah, as close as the ceiling

as I can get. Okay, it's about 60 feet. You go up. You fly down, down. You pluck a feather. Nothing's happening, by the way. You don't see him disintegrate. You drop a feather down. And lands on the stair. All right. Sits there. So maybe now drop feathers as you go back,

like breadcrumbs, so we can see where it starts to disintegrate. And Queep does land on that step and nothing happens. I don't want to go closer to it. No, no. Keep yanking your feathers out like a neurotic parrot. Or could you just hurl feathers from where you are? I'm going to pick my feathers out and eat them. What?

Uh-oh. He's just getting into character. It's my Toby Hooper impression. Are you going to drop more feathers? Yes. He's returning and dropping feathers. Okay. Yeah, sure.

To find where the thing is. Yeah, I mean, you get all the way up and it looks like you're fine until the step. And when you drop it on the step, it just sort of like starts shaking and you can't tell what the fuck is happening. But it sits on the step and it looks like it's like vibrating in and out of existence a little bit.

And it doesn't disappear. It doesn't explode. It just... But all the other ones are fine. Because it's not moving forward. All right. It's staying... It's like...

How big is the step? It's about five feet wide. How does everybody else... Can we get over it? Can we swing over it? We got the rope. I think we want to get farther than just that step for safety reasons. Why don't we... Should we... Could I... Use the rope to create some kind of... Yeah. Well, we got the rope. We want to get farther than just that step for safety reasons. Why don't we,

should we, could I use the rope to create some kind of, yeah, create an anchor here. So at least now we have some sort of last trap. Exactly. We can just, I think we can just run holding on to queep and go just a series of people

grabbing. Yeah, but we don't have to go very far. It's not like you have to go far this time. You know what I mean? All right. We're, I think we're doing that. What are It's not like you have to go far this time. You know what I mean? All right. I think we're doing that. What are we doing?

Why don't we use the rope? Because we've already done that. Then we got to put the things back in. You weren't here when we did this before without you. There's a big spike trap everybody made you fly everyone over. We already used you last time. We didn't tell you about this. How dare you?

We're bad friends. How dare you? I'm a bad dungeon master. I should have sent you a lengthy email about a spiky trap, and I didn't tell you about this how dare you we're bad friends how dare i'm a bad dungeon master i should have sent you a lengthy email about a spiky trap and i didn't all right all right more fun but fine yes all right if anybody dies it's your fault no no we should use the ropes all right well you can use the rope it's like a safety harness what i'm envisioning what i thought would be fun would be hang gliding on queep oh let's do it you know yes let's go for it pretend it's but no i never know i don't want

to you're right it's smart and better to use a rope harness and go that way so you're going to build a rope harness we'll do the same thing yeah iron spikes all of it and you're going to jump or you're going to zip line oh line well i think we'll leave that up to the individual with your engineering kit you can put together some kind of zip line. Yeah. Great. Okay. Okay.

We create a zip line. All right. Roll one more survival check TikTok to create the zip line. Brian immediately heard survival and went running for his dice. But yeah, he's making. He can do it. I got a natural 20. Sorry, I'm an asshole.

You're not. I'm just teasing you, you sensitive cutie pie. He is cute. Right? Look at him blush. He is cute. Right? Look at him blush. Like a little baby. It seems very secure. You make a really strong looking zip. You guys can now zip line over this

step if you want. Sell tickets. Everybody do an athletics check. I'm going to need you to get over a five. I'm there. You're fine. You fly naturally. Dr. Ewing, you can choose to zip line or fly. I'm there. You're fine. Yeah, you fly naturally. Do you want me to spot you? Dr. Reed, you can choose to zip line or fly.

Yeah, I can. I'm going to zip line and I got a, what did I get? I got a 16. 17. 17. Same. Awesome. Natural 20.

You guys all do great. What about Hush's zippers? She botches. No! Can my natural 20 help her? Nope. Shit. Okay, but it's a, she, it's, it's a,. Shit. She might get over the step.

She might not land on that one step. That's how it's going to go. She did botch. Okay, well, I'm just saying. So roll 100. Oh, this isn't an attack. This is an ability check. This is just going to be the worst possible

outcome. Hashinka grabs a hold of the zipline. And you set it about 10 steps behind. And it's, you know, even more. Did she say two days to retirement before she slides down? Yeah. And, you know, she's kind of like grabbing on to this. And she just one hand kind of dips for a second.

The zipline. And she went last. The zipline kind of dips for a second. The zipline, and she went last. The zipline kind of like, and she like tries to kind of like do a bounce, but she completely screws it up. Her back lands on the step and you just sort of see her bounce and then in a bunch of different directions at once

just disappear. Oh shit. Undo, undo. Control Z. Let's go back to our last save point um that's not good at all okay but do we think she was just went to and she like teleported to another area or a plane of existence i mean i don't think she's dead well here's the thing we don't know what that was she did not recognize it don't but what i mean is that was not a violent fang thing it wasn't a yes i know so somebody either up ahead set that that is not violent fang or somebody who has i kneel and pray to valker and and you should too, since you're now a Valkyr follower. Oh, Valkyr.

Our friend has dissipated like waves on the shore. I need a religion check from both of you. I'm not good at these. You did really good last time. That's how you remember? Oh, I believe me. That's cocked. Sorry.

That's good. 16. 19. See? Oh. You're having a little trouble connecting to your... Ew there's a mosquito on your mic foam and get it get it get it good it's alive and flying at sarah's face uh it wasn't actually flying at her face but i enjoyed making her it was cool uh you focus though, TikTok, and for just a second

you see this ocean and kind of rising out of the ocean the vision of just one of the sending stones. And then it descends back under the water. Does that mean we're supposed to call the Archmage? What does that mean? Do an insight check,

TikTok. Oh, yeah, you would know. That's a teleportation more or less. Oh, Sending Stone. I thought, isn't Sending Stone the talky-talky? Only a 10. Talky-talky. I mean, it does look familiar. I mean, it's, yeah, I mean,

I would say normally could we use, does it mean talk to Valkyr? But I think it means, yeah, it means use the Sending Stone and talk to the Archmage of Anzervale. Or. You both have words left. He doesn't have as many but or or he said that when you say sending stone you mean he saw the he saw the rocky talk he said if we if we don't

come to him he was going to come get us what do you think that that's where well you just said what if it's a teleportation thing and not a death thing? That's right. So maybe everybody... I think that she's with him now. Ask if Ashika's with him. Yeah. Well, I'm not going to... Let's see. Okay. We say...

Ice-5 calling. That it? Yeah. Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line. And your prayer will be answered in the order of which it was received. There's an unkind amount of silence.

And then after a solid, like, two minutes of silence, you hear the Archmage's voice say, I warned you. And that's it. What? Where did he warn us? Where is she? Silence.

For, like like five minutes. Nothing. Well, I mean, are we supposed to walk through this and have our little chat with him now? Is that what he wants? I don't get it. Sarah's staring at me, but I have nothing to offer her.

Darkthor, do you want to go talk to the archmage of anzor i'll do it if i don't feel like it's gonna kill me if you don't want like i will give everybody just basically these things keep happening one more insight check as to what the fuck is going on hey sam where are we at what time we are at 24 minutes 50 minutes I botched so I feel like I'm probably gonna dive roll through there right this is just insight

19 Ken got his dice stuck in his tower you got a kidney tower stone 22 holy shit what was it rolling insight this is based off of the fact that you just saw Hoshinka I got a 22. Holy shit. What'd you get, Brian? What was it rolling?

What was it? Insight. This is based off of the fact that you just saw Hashinka evaporate, and then the Archmage just said, I warned you. Is that right? 17. Pretty good, but I think we got to give the high roll to Queep. Hey, Queep.

Yeah. With the various injustices done to your people, you feel a strong sense of vengeance rise in you. And you think the archmage did this somehow. And, you know, it's difficult to tell what, but this trap was set by him or someone who is under him. Yeah.

But I still can't tell if it's a, you don't know enough about magic or yeah I don't know shit about magic well the trap is at this point behind you I mean you none of you really send her back

did you say to him silence should we send him something we will crush Coral do an intimidation check you're good at those Should we send him something? We will crush Coral. Do an intimidation check. You're good at those.

Dead air. 15. Okay. It's not dead. It might have just been teleported. There's more silence than you just hear. No. Do it.

I make the sound of crushing something through the sending check do a deception check it's not a word it doesn't even count towards my total no so in the time it takes you to sort of like do all this you guys hear up the stairwell that's just after

wow this is sort of like and then like another minute goes by and you just hear this like deep booming noise coming from far up the stairwell from where you came i hope it's not one of those big round rocks or should we let me scalp us yeah yeah guess. Maybe should we get fucking running, though? Well, maybe he can fly fast, right? Or Queep can go. Whoever can fly up and stop there.

I'm going to... I've still got Dispel Magic or Detect Magic, so maybe I should go up front and just sort of keep an eye on if there's any crazy trapset. I'm trying to think of something like if we had a hand grenade, we could put it on the staff.

To mark it for him? No, we'd send it to him. There is still a feather sitting on it going w it would send it to him there is still a feather sitting on it oh to send it the feather hasn't moved no it's just sitting there going like roll maybe it has to roll through or something but she just fell on it right she found it with forward momentum from the zip line and she kind of it's like a you activate that was a really good idea though yeah something that will explode yeah wait a minute but what if she's there so because i guess i'm just being hopeful.

No, wait, the stair was already activated. We went through it. Okay, that wouldn't work. Well, what if you send one of us and we are the hand grenade? I just don't know if it's gonna... If we'll survive it or if it, you know... And then it would just be one of us fighting this wizard.

Yeah, exactly. I would love to punch him in the face. Oh, dear. More pressing concerns. I heard a big explosion at the top of this tunnel we're in. I think we need to run. Well, Queep or... You see this sort of deep red glow start to form.

Yeah, see, something's happening. We gotta go. Like almost too red and too dark of a glow. All right, we can start running. A normal fire. Remember at the bottom of this is like a teleportation thing. I feel like there's a lava coming. Yeah.

So let's go. Hopefully the trap will trap whatever is coming down. Yeah, good call. Let's run. But if he sent it, then he would deactivate the trap for it. Don't you think? I don't know so one more time is there any trap or are you sending gusts behind you what is there any kind of we're

just going forward momentum forward momentum all right i'm gonna have his magic checking great uh dr uid in addition to this i want you to do an uh perception check and i almost said arcana can i support him in the perception? No, because I'm going to let it's, it's him. He's the only one who can see, and I'll let you choose. You can actually make this,

keep your role, but like the, you can use the bonus either from Arcana or perception. I'll do Arcana. Cause that's plus six and I got a 15. So 21. Do you have a proficiency? Yes.

You can roll a second time for hire if you want. No. Okay. 21. Okay. 21. Everybody else, please roll a athletics check to try to sprint downstairs. And then hit the showers. 22. 23.

Wow. All right, guys. 24. 13. These guys have got over 20. What are you doing,irteen. What'd you get? Thirteen. These guys have got over twenty. What are you doing, Sarah? What'd you get? They're cheating, though. They are cheating.

Oh. Oh, did I have to do an athletics? Brian looks so wounded. You did that, too. Yeah, because you are running while you do this. Okay. It's fifteen. He almost got as low as you, Sarah, but you should still be ashamed because you're thirteen.

I'm being really hard on you this episode. I'm in a well of shame at all times, don't worry. So you all spring. Nobody trips or or anything which is what would have happened if you rolled under a 10 um but uh yeah you're all jogging and you go for like an hour at a full clip and it just keeps going it just keeps going and the red glow seems to thicken a little bit and you hear almost after it's been another hour just some like like quiet very low like crackling noises

coming ahead crackling behind you you don't want to circle back and see what that is yeah guzzy don't get too close oh I was oh creep yeah he's gonna do it you're gonna go he's gonna shake a tail feather and just check it out. Do a perception check.

All right. Oh, and a stealth. Because I would just say you would know you don't necessarily want to be going full force into whatever this is. Perception is... Queep. Seven. Careful, cutie bird. Stealth is a 13.

All right. You start... Fine, fine, fine let's go for a while all of a sudden you notice like it's almost there's so much glowing around you that it should hurt like it's almost heat but it's too dark the the red is just kind of strange and then you you realize like up ahead it just feels like there is a black emptiness with like the the red outline of some large giant sized being descending all right turn around come back it better not be a langolier i don't want to deal with those langoliers you you encountered this before so this has happened this is this is uh familiar beyond the stair so So whatever this is, it's, it's made it past the,

the stair that you saw Hoshinka dissipate on. You can relate that to everybody as you fly back, but you're, are you all waiting or running while he tries to catch back up to you? I think we're keep running. Then athletics check from everybody and Queep. I'm going to have you do an athletics check just to see if you can catch up to them while they're going. No, no.

17., no. 17. Oh, no. Roll 100, Sarah. Are you going to fall down nine hours of stairs? I got a 21. I got a nine on my athletic. So, Queep does not catch up to you guys? 16. Where'd you get? 17.

21. I'll find you that I can just do this one 53 Okay so Sarah Everyone's clipping along Everyone's clipping along And you take Plus

You take 11 points of bludgeoning damage as you trip on one of the stairs and just crack your head on one of them and slide down. Oh, no. You are now... Does anybody see her? Yeah, you all see this happen, but it happens too fast.

There's no... I don't mean to help. It happens... You're kidding. Ha-ha. I said ha-ha. It happens too fast. I'm rolling the point. the point how did dark get right in her face so fast you're all you know too focused on your own running to do anything except laugh if you want

um no we're not nelson okay well i thought you are that you're uh what's his face karen from succession would he would he oh yeah he'd smirk a little um and yeah so you take some bludgeoning damage sarah and it's over really quickly so you're able to pull yourself um back up but you are you are a little stunned and it's hard for you to focus great um queep has not caught up to you guys yet queep you're just like trying to fly but like you're you're a little winded because you're like you you're trying to make good time already and now you're you've been going for like another 45 minutes and you're just like oh it's not happening too much um and you are able to go faster because you're flying it's just not enough to catch up to them while they're running um do

you guys stop when sarah trips yeah i guess so yes so are you okay it takes you at least 10 minutes before you feel normal so you're gonna either need to be carried or wait. I'm going to Goodberry. Do some Goodberries. Thank you. Do you want to be carried? Roll the heel. This might be an opportunity for us just to take a break ski.

You could roll. Well, if he's trying to catch up anyway, then maybe we can wait until he does and then go. Sure. That really rang your bell, huh? So you guys wait. What? Seven. Okay. So give her the seven and then

and i do not uh freak out thank you you wait about 15 minutes and queep is able to catch up to you jesus uh what did you see big red black horrible thing it was familiar

to me or no? Do a history check. All righty. Well, that is a 11. No. Not from, I don't know what it was. All he can relate is something. But a creature.

Black, glowy thing. Can you do like a courtroom sketch? Just a shape of like, yeah, like it had arms, legs, and a head, and a torso. Did it play giant? Just this dark red outline against pitch black is all he could make out. And on that note, as Queep catches up to you and your bell gets a little unrung from waiting, Halcine, you're able to run again, but it'll happen next episode. So, Sam.

Hey, everybody. What do you think happened today? In episode 57, uh, we all leveled up. I think I speak for everyone when I say about time, uh, turns out,

I don't know shit about moon elves. We rested for so long that I feel refreshed. I think it's nice when people do feelings check. We should all be doing that daily, uh, game. Oh, I botched game wise,

game wise. I don't know what's going on so far i botched finding a rat is my favorite phrase so far uh i swear if queep can lay an egg i'll reverse kill myself uh oh shit are we about to take turns writing queep pretty sure we just dropped someone off a zipline into an abyss we're all real chill about it uh it's been a while since we've had a game like this where after a full hour I don't understand a single thing we're doing. And oh, we're falling down the stairs. I'm up to date.

Thank you, Sam. As always, thanks, Sam. Anything you want to plug, my friend? Come see my monthly show at Geeky T's called The Filling with me and my BFF Tay Lux. My record Grandpa Metal is finally out yeah came out on uh valentine's day and you can buy it as a late valentine because you fucked up valentine's day do that she's gonna be upset that you didn't get her Tic Tacs. Anything else?

Oh, I'm going to be painted silver and acting like a robot with Stacy Keach on Venice Boardwalk. I was wondering what was going on with you and the Keacher. Yeah, me and Stace. The old Keach master. Yeah, we like to disco out there. Just kind of get back to our roots. Hey, Dan, we've got a bunch of great new merch.

Where should we send people to find that? Go ahead and get merch at nerdpokerpod.com Thanks, buddy. Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening to another episode of Nerd Poker. You can follow us at patreon.com slash nerdpoker and you get bonus episodes from there. And you can also send us anything at p.o box

one six zero six nine encino california nine one four one six thanks for listening oh oh hey dan can i do my impression of impression of David Brenner as a T-Rex? D Brenner is T-Rex. D Brenner. How you doing? How you doing? How you doing? Don't you hate it when mammals eat your eggs?