Nerd Poker - The Fog Campaign Episode 49

Episode Date: January 11, 2026

The swamp monsters are munching and crunching on our fish army! Oh boogers. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

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Nerd Poker. We're calling it. The Svald Campaign. My friends are here. Chris, Blaine, Ken, engineer Sam, and of course our kick-ass DM, Dan Telfer. Welcome to Nerd Poker. Hey, everybody.

It's Brian Passain, and you're listening to it. poker. My friends are here. It's episode 49 of the Fog campaign and we're in it. We should get back into the action. My friends are here. Dan, Blaine, Chris, Ken, and running the show, as always, from the cool part of town. It's Sam, everybody. Hello, sweet children. Hey, buddy. Let's thank some people and then give me. back in the dungeons and dragoning. We sure will. Thank you to

all of the people who listen. And you know what? If you are one of our Patreon supporters, you might even get a shout out if you're one of our top two tiers of support. Some of those folks have usernames like F. Murray Kill Abraham. That is a good one. It really is. Thank you.

36, 24, 38, only if she's 5'3 and has two fingers up her ass. Oh, wow. That's not a brick house. that's sir makes a lot and Blaine. I like that joke and I cannot lie. Oh my God, have you seen the trailers for the new Anaconda movie? Yes.

Yeah. What is even happening? It's Paul Rudd and Jack Black, right? Yeah. Yeah, they're remaking Anaconda. It's a parody of remaking Anaconda. Yeah. A mockumentary of the making of the remake of Anaconda.

And my favorite part is the big cardboard cutout at the movie theater has reminded me that Paul Rudd always looks like he is faking running from things when he is faking. It's like the fakes. Paul Rudd just going like pretending to run in place as the anaconda is chasing him. Pretty, pretty entertaining poster. Thank you also to the supporters who I haven't said yet. They got names like decaf coffee. Thank you. Thank you, Sean.

Thank you. A Quinn Martin malfunction. Thank you to my favorite Middle Earth strip club, Sirith Bunghole. Thank you. Stay fucked harsh mellow, man. Thank you big. There's a lot of puns this round. Thank you, big audio dolomite.

Thank you, the Sarah Gazardo Rescue and Feats Fetish Foundation. Thank you, Ali, Ali, Bobali. Thank you, orc in a sheer nighty. Thank you. grundle-gunge, Dwarven-style toilet rat kebabs, drenched in Ernie's favorite baby curry sauce. Wow. And finally, thank you. 15 miles to the Roar Shack.

Blaine, who are those supporters brought to us by? Supporters brought to us by S. Worstos. Just the worst asbestos. It's not fireproof, and it doesn't even give you mesothelium. S. Worstos. Ass for it by name. Dan. Thanks, Blaine. Now it is time to talk about what happened last time. Oh, geez. You're having us stroke right now.

Yeah, hi, everybody. Our heroes are in the undercity beneath Delsmith, encountering shambling mounds. There is a whole swarm of them in a green, slimy room. But they had a hard time getting around, despite the fact that they have some shortcuts. If we look at our map, which we ought to share on the old socials, I'll send that to our socials person. It's almost impossible to not go through this room. They are trying to engulf a couple of your Kuatoa warrior friends. One of them, however, got shish kebabbed straight to hell.

Our friend Twiddin initiated putting some of the combat focus on the one who is not slowed. Many of them are slowed or were slowed by Ken, but then Ken got knocked out, and I realized during our mid-episode break, if Ken cast slow before you got knocked out, then you broke concentration and they are no longer slowed. Yes. I don't want to say anything.

Why would you? What kind of bastard would say something? Me! We are getting back into the thick of thing. before we get back into combat, did you guys have any questions you thought of between episodes? No?

All right. Lovely. I'm just going to be taking the slow icon off a couple of dudes, but the fish are going to be up next. Let's go, fishies. Fishy, fishy, fish.

It went, whatever I did go. I fucking hate that sketch. Nothing gave me more fever dreams as a child. And I love Monty Python, but that was like... That elephant coming up out of that long train hallway. Oh, my God. And the long hands.

I would get feverish diarrhea just from watching this catch. Sounds fun. Like, I would get pneumonia. It's in 300.5 degree fever. Wow. It's so fucked up. I hate the trunk. The fish eye lens.

Everything about it is upsetting. It's truly dreamlike. And it happens either right before or right after the most violent Monty Python sketch of all time where Terry Jones explodes his guts everywhere after puking over and over. Oh, that's at the end. This is, I think, right after it's right before or after the Zulu War sketch. Okay. I just got really fucked up by the meaning of life.

That's my point. My point is the meaning of life ruined me. Oh, were you watching it too young? What age were you? Oh, for sure. Oh, yeah. The TV that was raising me was left on,

and I probably saw that when I was like four or something. Oh, shit. Okay, yeah. What year did that come out? I probably watched it like the year it came out. Is what the mid-late 80s? Is there something early, early 80s? 83, so I would, yeah.

I would have been five or six years old or something. Yeah. Anyhow. Christmas in heaven. We're back. We are. And we're back. The Kuatua are attacking right now.

I'll say they stink on ice. It's a hit in finally. So he, ooh, he doesn't crib, but he gets the green number. It's like a high roll on damage. 12 points of damage on the far south guy Two of them are trying to escape the churning folds of these shambling mounds And

One went through, but he Does get out Just trying to figure why the other one didn't roll One moment Oh, and the other is stuck. So one of these guys is going to Loop Write himself

As soon as I can turn his token. I got to turn his token back around to fit my weird choice. And then three of the other Kuatoa are going to fire they're not going to fire. They're going to stab, excuse me.

They're going to slice. Ooh, two hits. Both for eight points of damage on the same guy. This guy who is kind of up front. So I'm going to try to move some

he's out the guy in the top like the northern most shambling mound is a little fucked up he's still engulfing one of the Kuatowa

and he is going to now hit the Kuatua who's got him and gulls that's going to hit the encased Kuatua for 13 points of bludgeoning damage

you're a loud crunching those nope The shambling mound is digesting him. And so there is a loud crunching noise. It's a, you get yay if you're rooting for the shambling mounds. I think maybe you're not, though. No.

No. And then putting them back in the turns. This guy's going to move towards Ken and attack. Buggers. But he's going to attack Bougars? Bougars is like, Buggers is your awes. sucks. Yeah.

Two hits, 21 and a 26. Great. Good night. Do you have 12 hit points? Yes. You lose 12, and are you still up? Yes.

All right, then you get hit for another six. No, I'm down. Okay. You go to baseball. gonna try to attack the guy who just got out of him for two hits so one of the Kuatawa pulls himself out of the roots

of this this shambling mound that tried to engulf him and he gets smashed for 13 points of bludgeon damage and he already got crunched up a little bit and then he's going to take One more. Eight. He goes down.

The shambling mound that just smashed him is going to drag itself over the Kuatola's lifeless body and absorb him in its root system. Shamble, if you will. He is. And then this last one is going to attack

glugue and two misses. up next to the turn order is Little Peepers. So Peepers is going to stab, stab, stab, stab the guy in front of him. Nice. So it's 21 to hit and he gets to do a

Siri I'm not talking to you. Go away, Siri. He has back, which means if you hit a creature of the short sort and yield damage, you have advantage on your next attack roll. First, he's going to do

seven points of piercing damage. on the shambling mound that's all up in his shit. And Dan, I think you get sneak attack too. Hmm. You don't say. I believe so. Check your sneak attack, but I think you do. Oh, but I do. I do indeed. 5D6, much like Brian. Now there's 17 points.

This guy is getting carved up really bad. As was mentioned, he was getting beat up, and now things are looking rough for it. Blaine, you're out I'm going to I'm going to move away I'm going to kind of get away from these these guys

and I'm going to I guess I'm going to shoot a crossbow at him which one the one that I already had gotten some damage You know what? I'm going to hit him with another chromatic orb. Can I do that?

There are five of them standing in, yeah. The one that you hit with the chromatic orb is the one sort of to the west of Ken. It's like right on top of Ken. It's been smashing Ken. Okay. I'm going to watch. I'm going to hit him again with another acid orb. Okay.

And that's a 15 plus 7. So 22. 22 to hit? 22 to hit. That's a hit. And. We're looking for a 15 on the shambling mounds. You want to make a meter beat of 15.

Three points. Eight, eight, and three. So 19 points. Damn. Another explosion of acid. I think it, was it this one? The one that's like standing over Ken's unconscious. Yes.

That's what I've been marking. Also pretty screwed up. And yeah, I'm sort of, uh, I'm keeping my eye on both of these, this guy and this guy just kind of, I want to make sure that if they come at me, I can bolt. All right.

Well, Ken. Sorry, quick question. If I, if I, like, ran, like, down around here, is there, there's no ledge or anything that I can run on to get around this pool?

Not easily. Lil Peeper's trying to scramble up the wall to get a good position and he couldn't make the athletics check. You could try. It would mean clinging to a wall. You are a cat, so you have a unique ability to cling and crawl across things. It is a very knotted, rocky cobblestone-like surface with roots coming up between the cracks. And you could get a pretty good purchase and possibly attack from the side.

It'd still make you roll an athletics check to attack while grabbing the wall, though. Okay. All right. Good to know. Cool. Thank you. Ken. DST, baby. Where are you, Ken? Huh? 17. It's a success. Where in the world?

Yes. Oh, okay. I'll be doing that later tonight. I'm behind the Comedy Store. Oh, are you really? Yeah. Wave to all the ghosts for me. Did Bugsy kill you? Cool.

Chris, it's you. You're up. Oh, shit. I'm going to... I like how you scat. That's a good job to scatting. Thank you. I'm going to hold a healing spell,

and the trigger for it is the next time when it's little peeper's turn. What I'm trying to do is avoid healing Ken and bringing him up and then a bunch of dudes get to attack him before he gets to do anything, which is what would happen normally. But if I ready my spell, my healing spell, and I trigger it on Little Peeper's turn, Ken should be able to get to go before the monsters next time. Does that make sense, That does. I think because Little Peepers is at the top of the turn order technically, don't you have, if you're holding it, don't you have to do it in the same turn? So we can do it. It would just mean it's sort of like after the last shambling mound. Well, it's until my next turn. I'm holding this until my next turn. I could remember how holding a turn worked. Yeah. So I'm going to hold the heel. So when we get to Peepers, I'm going to trigger it and then cast Healing Word again on Shalab. Hopefully with better results. We'll see. Yeah, that makes sense.

I follow. And so one of them is going to attack little peepers. There's a couple of them that have advanced pretty thoroughly on everyone, a couple that are kind of making their way in. That is a crit and a hit against little peepers. I'm going to use my reaction, Dan. Okay, dokey. On the crit, I would like to use.

what's it called? Silvery barbs. You magically distract the triggering creature and turn its momentary uncertainty into encouragement for another creature. The triggering creature, the shambling mound that got a crit, must re-roll the D20

and use the lower roll. Wow. Oh, Chris, did you see what it just did? Oh, oops. That's a botch. It's a botch. And because that's its first attacked, this may very well negate its second attack. So this would be interesting.

Ooh, 62. Oofa. Oh, no, that's a 60 with two fingers up your ass. Oh, that little person. Its next attack is going to have disadvantage on the old botch table.

It rips like a tendon in its shoulder as it swings, so it's going to have to roll one more time for that second attack. That's a miss. And then, yeah, the other one is going to move towards Blaine and attack Blaine. Yeah. What if it, what if it didn't, though?

Surprise. What is your AC, Blaine? My A.C. is 14. 14? Okay. This is an 18 and a crit 27. Okay. You only get one reaction, right, Chris?

Yeah. All right. So, good news. The die damage for the crit is not great. So it is 19 and set 26 points of bludgeoning damage. Okay. Yeah. Is that, can I do, can I take a reaction?

Can I do uncanny dodge? Yes. When attacker you can see hits you with an attack, you can take a reaction to have the attack's damage against me. Yes. So that 26, you can turn into a 22. Or wait, no, excuse me, 26, you can turn into a 14. No, 12.

13. What if I could do math? So like you need to do some subtractor all. You wouldn't need to talk about it. That was a pretty good joke to subtract. I really enjoyed it. I wish I could have given it more, but I was proud that one. Say it again. Say it one more time.

Yeah, do it again. Hey, Dan, sounds like you need to take some subtractor all. Holy shit. Holy shit. What else? A total of 20 damage. playing total 20 damage

Okay And then it's It's uh Brian's turn Yay Well I'm gonna throw my silvery barbs Uh part of my silver barbs I get to give it to somebody

I'll give it to Brian Oh cool To have advantage Brian on one thing Oh okay I bet it's a stab Yep Luckily I have advantage Oh 17

Will that work? Oh yeah yeah, that's a hit. Okay, cool. And that means it's a crit. Yay. Ooh, baby. Wait, wait.

So double your die damage. 11 again. And that's doubling the die? Yeah. Okay, cool. And your sneak attack. Oh. And that's 5D6?

See? See? Yes, yes. And then 21 on that. Did you double that, though, Brian? No, 42. How would you like to see this shambling mound die? Oh, Jesus.

Uh, hmm. Let's all take a moment here at Murder Corner. Give it some Thanksgiving thought, Brian. Thanksgiving for us as we're recording just a couple days away. What are you grateful for as you completely destroy every one of these fuckers with your Adamantine chamelling? Are you going to unplug the jukebox and do us all a favor? I think I drive it into him and then pull it out super fast and all the guts come with it. And then he just folds.

Oh, my God. Wow. Folding and rapid stabbing. You're going to love Sisu too. Nice. So that guy is toast And I think you have a bonus action You might be able to do something

Um How do I have bonus action? You always have a bonus action Oh I'm just trying to remember what we had just talked about Oh yeah just you could have disengaged Or you have If you could be doing this regularly

Steady aim you give yourself advantage on your next attack roll on the current turn provided you haven't moved during the turn. Okay. It just means you can't move the next turn.

So keep in mind in the future, if you want to sort of plant yourself, you can steady aim and then roll with advantage. Okay. Jaffrey could be doing

a shitload of damage with this javelin. I'll do that on the next one. Yeah, yeah. You'll just need to sort of like providing you haven't moved during your turn. So I haven't yet.

Yeah. Yeah. I think that's it for this turn now. Okay, cool. Kuatua time. Stop. Mm-hmm. Collaborate and listen.

No. No? No. If we actually misses, that third role was an accident. And then we've got. a whole bunch of slices happening and three of them hit

nice all right those uh there's there's four shambling mounds left and you see the Kuatua like sort of start to surround the front one and this guy is getting carved up who's

mostly surrounded nice and then the arch priest Gulk It's going to cast Hold Monster on the shambling mound in the back.

Alas, he somehow with his terrible stats manages to make the wisdom saving throw. Shambling mound time. The one over by a glug is going to try to smash him and devour him. No, don't do that.

He has a name. hold out my children oh my god botch botcheruni botch here comes 42 42 on the botch table

permanent shame related to childhood companion the shambling mound remembers way back when it was just a tiny sprout and its best friend

an acorn said I believe in you and he now knows somewhere the acorn is a virtuous beautiful oak tree above the ground and would be ashamed of what he has become.

He loses the rest of his turn. Wow, what an inner life for these things. Hey, look, we got to have fun here. This guy is going to get two hits on Blaine. Although you have an uncanny Dodge you can do with the first one, yes? Yes. So that means he has disadvantage? What does that mean?

Uncanny Dodge is when an attacker I can see hits me, I can take a reaction to have the attacks damage. Got it, okay. So that first one is going to be 17. So have that and you are taking eight points of damage. Then another 13, so for a total of 21 points of damage. Okay. All right.

I'm doing okay. I wish I was better doing okay We have a double in the turn order All right That should do And then we are At Lil Peeper

It's heel time Oh okay We'll do that right now All right I'm casting it At third level So Ken You get

13 hit points Nice Thank you sir Thank you All right Awesome. Little Peepers is going to start firing crossbow bolts at the surrounded guy. I'm sorry, short bow arrows.

Not crossbow bolts. Did that go twice? Nope. One, but it's a hit. And then another hit for 17 and 28. Nice. 21 points of damage. He's almost toast.

That lead guy who is still standing. starting to rock back and forth the shambling mound's massive form is getting carved up by the Kuatua and now Little Peepers has stuck a couple of arrows in it Blaine you're up how are you doing a hit points plane

I'm doing okay I'm maybe down maybe down halfish not quite half I'm going to I'm going to take us I'm going to take a little jog I'm going to try to run

I'm going to try to run around sorry kind of go do this thing and try to get over to this place right here but can I before I do that I would like to this guy is still up and up and running right everyone visible is still up and running

I'm also just double checking yeah so you'll have to use your action or bonus action to disengage and not get an opportunity attack? Which one would you like to use? Which one can I, which one can I do? Dishengage. Yeah, like you're just going to get hit if you don't,

if you don't disengage and because you're rogue, you can use either your action or your bonus action. Normally you would, you want to use your bonus action so you can attack or something. I'll use the bonus action to disengage. And where were you about to go before I sort of cut you off and made you talk about that? Oh, I was just going to kind of try to run along the wall back here

and get over to this opening, these pink lines here. Those pink lines are a weak structure point in the wall that you might be able to smash through rocks that have had a root system sort of push them apart a little bit. So can you put your token where you want to end up, please?

Yes. Hi, guys. And I still have a crossbeder that I can use over here. Where'd you go? Oh, all the way over there? How did it?

You don't have that much movement, buddy. I can run at 60. I have 60 movement. But can you climb the same speed? Maybe you can because you're a cat. I can climb at 30. I have 30 climbing. Okay.

So is that only going to put me about halfway there. I think just because, yeah, you can only do half. Or you can only do a feline agility doesn't also double climbing, does it? No, I think, but my, let me see, feline, da-da-da-da-da-da. Oh, it does.

You get to move the full 60. I stand corrected. I do just ask you move maybe like five feet south. Okay, great. according to the internet feeling agility also works for climbing okay fun you're a quick little kitty

I'll scoot you down five I'm experiencing fecal euphoria listeners I'm staring at a you Jesus Christ that's what cats poop and then they run they get the jimmies I'm being a stickler because Blaine is crawling

along a wall because there's like a giant pool of swamp slime that the shambling mounds emerged out of and Blaine implied he did not want to be submerged in it so I'm giving him a gimmee there. You still have an action though so you're going to attack?

Yes. I'm going to I'm going to do a crossbow or yeah have a hand crossbow going on. Cool. Can you just do an athletics check to stay clinging to the wall while firing a crossbow bolt? Yes, 17 plus So 19 plus 2. Also, you have not equipped any of your stuff in D&D Beyond.

I know you're doing physical dice, but I'm going to do that so I can easier follow you along. It's a hand crossbow. Yeah, that's a 16 to hit. Nice. And it only does 1D6. 5. I wish I had some poison

I got to get some poison It's 1d6 plus 4 So that's 9 points of damage plane Okay oh good And that's the farther south guy Yeah I'll just do yeah this guy right here Okay cool

Don't forget your extra damn damn On top of the die roll everybody What's the extra 4 from If you look at D&D Beyond Like I literally just mentioned that I was Making you equip your weapons under actions, it'll show hand crossbow, plus eight to hit,

damage 1B6 plus 4. Oh, okay, okay. Previously, it just said your only actions were firebolt, unarmed strike, or cat's claws. I was like, no. That's not right. Yeah, the hand crossbow.

It's helpful. Blade. Tis his moments like this. Oh, Bloodshed blade, we, you didn't even put that in your inventory in D&D beyond. You still a goose. No. So actually,

we're going to have to make sure that you have that. I'll be trying to do that for you in the background. Ken, you're up. I'm going to cast Stormsphere, fourth level. Right about here. That's not working. Yeah, right about there, so it can get all four of these guys. I think it's a 20-foot sphere.

Okay. And which... One second. Blaine, which bloodshed did you take short sword? Short sword. Yes. Great. So I have a Vex.

I have Vex hand crossbow and Vex Short Sword. Cool. Just making sure which saving throw, Ken? No saving throw. I just cast. Oh, great, please. Team. That is a hit.

Pardon me while I sneeze. Does it hunt in advance? So that is 2D6 budgeting, 46 lightning. Oh, damn. That is going to hit all of them. Let's see the dams. And why is it not chunk? I want a ranged attack.

Oh, so it should be 46 then because it's ranged. Hell yeah. So that, okay, let me check what I had. Sorry. I wish you would check. That's nine plus three. Twelve. Twelve.

Spread amongst them. Excellent. So that's like three points each? Yeah, I guess. A little underwhelming when you spread it around four people, I suppose. This is the first damage that's been done to the Northwest guy. He's still in good shape. the two east the eastern guys though are fucked up real bad

can I get out of here well unfortunately you did just use your action and I don't think you can disengage but if I would check your bonus actions and see if you have anything that could be oh I might engage I thought because I was corner to corner I wasn't engaged okay I mean you're almost flanked yeah do you have any bonus action stuff you could try

let's see I don't know I think I have like no I don't Use your magic fish spine I do feel like that needs to That needs to get used for its astroplane swimming Turned into a fish Oh yeah

Forget about that But it's okay Yeah Come join me over here at the pink wall Yeah let me look at the notes You also have Is it Draconic Ancestry So you could be using

Dragon's Breasts Yeah know. As a bonus action. As a bonus. I don't have a bonus action. Yeah, you do. Oh, okay. Look at your bonus actions.

I don't see any bonus actions. Oh, bonus actions. Oh, shit. Look at that. It says here you can kill everything. Wow. All right, yeah. Then I'll cast fucking Dragon's breath.

Jesus. Yeah. Just remind me which draconic ancestor you have so we know what damage it is and which guy you're hitting. I don't know if I can choose or not. I think you'd choose when you create your character what kind of draconic, like, chromatic dragon is your heritage. I think it's fire, red, whatever.

So that's not helpful. Not for these guys, but you could do some damage. And they are fucked up if you remember. All right. The enthusiasm really went from a 10 to a 2, everybody. All right, so Dragon's Brath, where is it? Cast. Dragon's Brow, I see, so it depends on Mike.

Dux saving throw of 17. Oki, okay. So this is going to be the top guy or the bottom guy? The more fucked up guy. That'd be top, and he has, much like his friend, garbage dexterity, 13. All right. And that is 3D6 fire damage.

Ooh, baby. So. If they're resistant to it, do they still take fire damage or does it get cut in half? Yes, cut in half. Oh, okay. All right. They're not immune. Immune is the real bummer one.

So that's 15, so seven, I guess. How would you like to see him die? Ooh. I've been in honor of Thanksgiving. I will pull his neck out and shove it up his butt. Yay! I turn neckin. Wow.

Along with some jamblits. The God tear peers down and says, I do not pardon you as he has his neck shoved way up his shambler ass. He is toast. There's three of them left. Enjoy your bonus action, Ken? Yeah, that was nice. I got to write that down or something.

should. I'm going to use a cantrip and cast mind sliver. I drive a disorienting spike of psychic energy. And to the mind of a creature, I can see within range. So I will pick, I guess maybe one of those guys in the back. You said this one here has taken very little damage. I guess the one that was. Okay, yeah.

So I'll pick that guy. That thing has to make a, intelligence saving throw DC 17 These things are dumb as fuck nine good it takes

uh shoot only four points of what kind of damage is that it's magical uh oh radiant it looks like is that radiant oh psychic my mistake sorry

it takes four psychic damage and then is there another thing to it yes and I'll keep track of this. If it has to make a saving throw within the next turn, it also, because of the mind sliver, is little goofballs,

and so it's going to lose one from any saving throws until the end, I believe, of my next turn. Or the end of my next turn, yeah. I'll keep track of it. Thank you, Chris. Up next is one of the Shambly mounds. This guy is going to move up, and start swinging at one of the Kuatowa.

I'll actually go all the way up and go in full, like, suicide mode. Yeah, so he's going to try to engulf one of the Kuatua after smashing into him. Kuwaitoam manages to not get hit, or not get engulfed, but he is, going to take a great deal of damage, 35 points of damage, and he goes down. Brian, you're up.

Cool. What's a... Mayleo fish. Yeah, yeah, exactly. What plane said. Take a step forward, maybe? Sure. Oh, but I thought I couldn't move.

Not if you do steady aim, but then you just have to throw it if you want to use the advantage. You could either throw with advantage or step forward and not have advantage into your melee attack. I'm going to throw with advantage. OK. Done done done. Dun done.

Dun done. Dun done. Throwing the javelin made of Adamantium. Throwing it out of 20. 20. I think you should take either of them, but the 20 sounds great. Why don't you roll that damage and that's a crit? So double-to-die damage and I believe sneak attack damage.

Yeah. Cool. You've been quitting the shit out of this today. That's a man, yeah. Shit at a credit. Fantastic. Blaine, are you writing for that new game show? Shit at a credit?

Yeah. Yeah, they're bringing Wink Martindale back to life for it. It's very excited, yeah. My God. Yeah, I know. It's not union. Oh. Yes, problem.

I had to get a waiver from the shit guild. And it's 87% AI. Nothing worse than a shit scab. It's like 33. Actually, AI is worse than a shit scab. 33 points of damage. How would you like to see that shambling mound die? Ooh.

He goes, it's my wife's birthday. Oh, no. All right. So it's my wife's birthday. And you just see as he dies. Yeah, his phone lights up with a call from his wife. Yes, Brian? I lapped his head off.

I'm in Ruth's, Chris. Where are you? His decapitated head spins through the air. And the last thing it's used before his retinas go dark is his wife leaving a voicemail on his phone. Dorable. Also, it doesn't have retinas. He's a shambling mound. But he senses.

He knows it's her. Yep. All right, your javelin is stuck in his corpse. I assume you'd like to step forward five feet and retrieve it. I am. Yes, I will. Okay. There we go.

Well, up next in the turn order will be the Kuatoua, and we'll have to find out how that goes on our next episode. Yay. Nerting pokes. Good shit. You catch that one, Sam? I did. Ken pulled somebody's neck out and shoved it up their butt.

just like Thanksgiving hope you had a good Thanksgiving everybody it'll be December by the time you hear of this but I hope you had a good Thanksgiving yep it's festive anytime of year Turduck and Raj with docket anybody got anything they want to plug

Dan? Yep ain't too late I might have even posted a special holiday deal for hiring me as a dungeon master at this point so go ahead and check Dan Telford.com or my Instagram cool brimprane.com And then also nerd poker merch,

pick it up. Great Christmas ideas. And then that's it. Live dates, brampocene.com and all that. But I don't have anything until the new year. Blame. We attribute the success saved mankind for joining us. You got walls and a roof.

All that extra. Herr Poker. Linda pushes Righty into a difficult position that has lefty seeing red. Can they unravel the mystery before they're left holding the bag? All this, as a return to Brian in the hard chair, aren't all new nerd poker. Thanks for listening to another episode of NerdPoker. You can follow us at patreon.com slash nerd poker, and you get bonus episodes from there. and you can also send us anything at P-O-Box 16069

and Sino, California, 911 416. Thanks for listening.