Nerd Poker - The Fog Campaign - Episode 58

Episode Date: February 12, 2026

Hey hey hey, let's head to that sweet lil' loot room in the south west... wait, WHAT is in all the hallways?! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Hey, it's Brian Posane, nerd poker. We're calling it the Fog Campaign. My friends are here. Chris, Blaine, Ken, engineer Sam, and of course, our kick-ass DM, Dan Telfer. Welcome to Nerd Poker. Hey, everybody. It's Brian Pesani, you're listening to NerdPoker.

It's episode 58 of the Fog campaign. We're zooming it. My friends are all here. I think ramen's asleep. But I see Dan. Hi. Blaine. Hey.

Ken. Hi. And Chris. Spoiler, Brian. I saw a ramen. And ramen's awake. Hooray! Oh, there he is.

And running the show from the cool part of town. Always, as always, Sam, everybody. Hello, sweet children. Hey, man. Sam, you're on shaky cam. You're not being attacked by a Cloverfield, are you? No. Oh, I'll never tell.

Awful coy about that giant alien attack, Sam. Maybe. We should thank some people, huh? All right, well, I'm going to thank some supporters on patreon.com slash nerd poker at our top two tiers of support. We've got some new inside jokes here. And honestly, I'm excited to share names of the folks who support us. Like F. Murray Kill Abraham.

Thank you, F. Marie Kill Abraham. Thank you, Gooch Taint, Yambag. Ew. Thank you, Decaf Coffee, C-O-F-F-F-E-I. Thank you, Sean. Thank you, Blacken Post-Taw. Oh. Fon-Post-Haw.

Thank you, Sirith. bunghole. Okay. Thank you, the poopy hand of Russell Brand. Gross. Tripping at Epcot is hell of fun. Yeah, I bet.

If you thought it was fun for you, you should ask, Figment the Dragon, what he thought of it. Thank you, the Sarah Gazardo Rat Rescue and Feats Fetish Foundation. Thank you, Allie, Allie, Bowbally. Thank you 15 miles to the Roar Shack.

Thank you, Ork Inashir Knighty. Thank you, Zach Mawadweeb. Thank you, Glibbles and Bits. Thank you, Blair Campbell. Thank you, Tyler, Creator. Thank you, Florence Horror Tales. And finally, thank you, Hot Tub Diaria and the Playboy Grotto. Wayne, who are those supporters brought to us by?

Supporters brought to us by shirt. Put it on. Go inside. Shirt! From the makers of shoes. Sam tested. Sam approved. Shirt.

and Orange Julius. We put an egg in it so you might die. The Schrodinger's smoothie from Orange Julius. Dan? Thanks, Blaine. I guess I gotta stop buying all my shirts are Orange Julius. All right. It's time for us to talk about

what happened last time on Nerd Poker. We went in the door and then we left real fast as a worm-like being appeared beneath the burned robes of the hooded figure. It lurched towards everyone, and then it got lit up. It slowly lost its outer layers until it collapsed into a sticky pile

of viscous worms. We're briefly caught on fire and scraped off of Joffrey Spicoli. But the room has just gone quiet. You guys are out of initiative. The room still has these wafts of blackened smoke. Brian, you're in the doorway.

The rest of you are in the hallway. I mean, let's maybe get in that room and make sure there's nothing else in there that's going to try and kill us. You did smash the table. Can I get an Arcana check from everyone, please? Blaine, you can actually do this with not disadvantage.

Okay. The Arcana check you made earlier, it's related to it. I'll take the 21, the 14 plus 7. Nice. Nice. I'm going to add my 8 to that. So now we're really going to figure some stuff out. Ooh.

Oh. Everyone can roll. Blaine can roll with advantage. I'm not hearing anyone else's numbers. 11. 11. Brian? Yeah.

What's the role? Sorry. It's Magic Times role, Arcana. Oh, Arcana. Sorry, man. you just got you madame? I said, man. Oh, all right.

I'm getting very formal here. I call Ken Whalen Flowers. I'm still having trouble seeing when I roll. Oh, okay. No problem. Whelan Flowers, do you mean the lead singer of the killers? A 12, and then Chris, what did you get? Oh, I got an eight.

Okay. Well, Blaine's was high enough, with that advantage too. And you're going to note, there's all these, you know, really gross, crisp-up chunks of worm on the ground. A burned worm is pretty small.

They almost look like little chunks like burned hair or something. And the smell in here, again, it's very barbecue-y, but it's starting to get kind of sickening. And you look at the table, which I believe Ken was one who deliberately smashed the table,

the smithereens before, finishing off the worms and you're like you oh thank goodness he did because if the worms had splashed onto the sacrificial table it probably would have completed a ritual so you can tell from the way the components are all splayed on the ground the way the sort of candles in the middle of the altar were shattered on the ground like okay yeah this is a delicate thing that we almost could have spilled a bunch of viscous worms onto and that wouldn't have been bad at least That didn't happen. Yeah.

Just Brian, our friend. Yeah, he got burned it by me. I'm sorry. Brian, what are you for hit points, by the way? How many did that one thing get me? I thought it was seven because it was 14 and then half. Oh, yeah. Hold on.

Yeah, they had a lot of damage there. To have, hey, Dan. Point. I'm looking at this map. this right here, do you see where I'm pinging the little green circle? Is that a door or is that just a descent?

Do that one more time. I think where you were pinging, I wasn't maybe not looking at that part of the map. Right there. Oh, there. Yeah. That's not a door or doesn't look like it could be a door, does it? It looks like you could do an investigation

check. Okay. What an I investigation check? Blaine. a hand up and says he's going to go for a little trot down the hall. Can I put guidance on you for a little cat help? Yeah, sure. 11 plus 11.

22. You put him on a leash. That's so cute. That is so cute. 24. Yeah, a cat on a leash. It's almost as cute as a kid on a leash at the airport. The rocks and mud and bones that make up the walls here,

seem to have a very linear, crisp, vertical crack through them about four feet apart. Huh. Can I do a, can I do like a check for traps or like a super investigation? Um, yeah, you just do another one with a higher DC as you're trying to, you know, really dig in there while checking for traps. Okay. 13 plus 11 and another 24. Okay, yeah. You're not able to immediately just disarm it from exploring it.

You could do a more targeted, slight a hand check for that. But you're able to see that, yeah, like there's something spring loaded in this chunk of wall. Okay. You can't quite tell if there are hinges hidden somewhere. So this, do an inside check. That's an 18. Eight plus ten. You're not entirely sure that it's just a door.

You do think it is a panel that can move from where it is. Okay. There's something kind of off about the whole thing just because there's not a clear... Maybe it's just a big trap, like... Yeah, can I take... Maybe it's a jar. The door's a jar! And then someone drew up to Bill Hicks.

Someone call me a cab. Okay, you're a cab. Here's Charlie Pride. I'm going to drown both of you. Please. Hey, can I take a step back and try a mage hand and just sort of like, you know, slap it silly or something? Sure.

So you take a, you step back, use a mage hand too, and we're going to call it a sleight of hand check. Okay. Slate of mage hand. That's not good. It's a 10. If just for a trap, you weren't, you know, describing what sounded like a disarm more of a slap. So you're kind of just trying to set it off if it's easily set off.

Yeah, that's a 10. Yeah. And so you just kind of roughly pat it. You don't really get a response from the chunk of the wall that's significant, but it does look like it kind of jitters in place a little bit when it slaps it. Okay. Can we summon Kool-Aid, man? Oh, yeah. Please.

that'd be great or yellow while you're working on that I think I might join Spicoli in the ritual room and search around in there

I can make hand the door if you want I suppose you could too he did just mage hand the door he just did it as more of a like softly explore

a Tory thing can yeah investigation check from Brian and Chris investigation I'll give you Guidance, Brian, as well as myself. Investigation, pal?

Yep. Yeah. And then, Ken, would you go in there? Guidance? Oh, now it's showing up. You can go ahead and follow their leave. Is that an eight or four guidance? D4.

Okay, well, I only got a six, so stuck with that. Yeah, I did terribly. I got 11. Let me see. Let's see what I can be with this. at 12. Brian got a 10 total. 10 11, 12?

You guys dig around and the middle table is completely destroyed. There's a little bit of shattered plate that some of the components were on, but other than that, most of it is burned away. Ken slammed it deliberately and thoroughly. But in the back,

corners of the room to the top right and bottom right. There are small tables that have been heavily jostled from the fight, but have stayed intact. There's more spell components on them. There's also what looks like a few blank cards of some sort. Can we investigate those? Yeah, like cards. It's, yeah.

You, like, can we investigate them? Take a look at them. You can do a, Yeah, investigation check specifically on these cards. All right. 14. Nice. Four.

Can you kind of pat with your fingertips, the edges of these cards, and there are several layers to it? There are two very thin layers of paper with some sort of thick plastic between the thin paper layers. you've never encountered plastic before. It's this very strange feeling material. It's almost like soft glass. It's just like a conventioneer's pin. Let's get an insight check. Okay.

15. There's a bent quill and what looks like a few. other writing utensils. You think some sort of tabletop procedure was happening with writing and these little paper paper

with film in between them ritual. It's an asshole convention. The card's smaller than a typical piece of 8.5.11 paper in the earth world. In this world, they do sort of look like what would be a little flyer

for a temple or something. except there's just these strange layers inside of it and the material between them when you just sort of press it between your thumbs it's got a very odd soft feeling to it. Could there be something in there? Could it be like, I don't know, this is some sort of weird envelope

and there's something inside the plastic? Can we see clearly that it is just that there's nothing else being hidden in there, Dan? There's no instruction, sign, or further clues that there is an obvious use for these. It's a little like an alien ritual you've stumbled into. Blaine, what are you doing out in the hallway while they're looking at this? I'm going to go back to the fish guys

and see if any of them have like a long, like a pike or a javelin or something that they can kind of use at a distance to sort of jimmy these. this thing open. Absolutely. Yeah. The guy you've known for the longest, the barbarian known as Glug,

has got a sort of halberd, you know, a weapon that's a pole arm with, like, this edged claw at the end of it. That kind of looks like, kiteness. Wait a while you go and poke that thing you were slapping? C.C. Signor.

Meow. So he's going to do a slighting hand check. Slide a fin. Momento, for favor. He smacks at it a little bit and, um, I don't know if this is my specialty. I feel like I'm just doing exactly what you just did. You want to take my cloth, pull arm and try it yourself? Uh, yeah, I'll do that.

It's what it's got a wooden thing, right? It's wood, so I'm just worried I don't want to get shocked or something. The pike? Yeah. Now my dude, that's, that's a metal pike. they're not wood people uh okay i'll i'm just gonna try to pry something in there

get ready to get ready to get ready but are you're not gonna use his thing what are you going to use to pry you like your crowbar well i was going to use uh i was going to try it with his pike oh okay great so slide of hand check please uh you're basically like picking a giant lock nine plus four 13 not a good one.

Yeah, it's definitely, here's what you can tell. You haven't really gotten a result, a thorough result out of it, but this is a panel, and it looks like it moves forward and back a little bit, and it does rattle a bit, some pieces of bone,

tumble to the ground and skitter, and you're aware that it's not used to being jostled this messily, and this panel might be something that comes out, either very gently or roughly, but in a way where it's being disguised. Okay. Does it feel like something that we could like do a,

just do like a knockdown thing where we just shoulder into it? If you guys tried to deliberately open it, I mean, it would be a different kind of check because it's like a strength check as opposed to a slight of hand check. Can I get a couple of these fish warriors? to try that.

Yeah, the fish barbarian. He's probably the strongest one of us by far. No, man, I'll give it a shot. All right, cool. Is there anyone of us who could help him out who is, I don't know what everybody's strength is at. Mine is, how am I for strength? I have a 12 strength.

Okay. You could beat me up. Can anybody beat a strength of 12? Because I'll happily help. Yeah, I have a 14. Oh, do it. Great. Oh, dang.

All right. So you'll walk over and you'll help glug. Just grabbing the halberd with him and together you're going to just try and yank it open. Can I get an athletics check from Blaine to go with glubes? Athletics check from Blaine is pretty funny. That's why we're playing a fantasy game so we can have moments like that where we hear these things. Don't pull anything. 15 plus 2, 17.

Well, with his 21, you're nailing it. So between the two of you, you slam it, the edge of this Hallbird device in there really well. It gets a solid six inches deep this time, and you're able to rip to the side without shattering the halberd. It pops past some locking mechanism that didn't look like it was incredibly strong, but strong enough that you skipped the ritual that was meant to be the only way to do it. You're kind of breaking past a mild lock.

They didn't really expect anyone to find this. And it slides out. There's a central panel. And it's in the middle. So what you're kind of pulling out is almost like a library shelf that's embedded in a wall. It just sort of pulls out. Okay. And inside you see rows and rows of those cards.

The other guys found in the other room. The center of them is burned. And in the center, you just see the paper burned. away on two sides and the film in the middle has expanded and wrapped around a little cluster of worms. In some language, you don't recognize words are scribbled on these cards. They're packaged almost like action figures. The center area of this clear, soft glass-like substance is containing a wadsworth of worms.

And then there's this card backing that have things written on them to identify them somehow. There's about 200 of these cards hung on neatly ordered rows of racks like candy at an AMC movie theater. I mean, when we burn them all in a moment, it's going to be pretty cool. This is like Brian's Funko Pop collection. What languages do you speak, Plain? I speak common, elvish, thieves, cant, and under common. You don't recognize this language. How about Cat?

Would you like to call your friends over? Yeah, I'm going to go. Yeah, I'm going to see, just go. Hey, I'll poke my head in the room over there. I go, hey, if you guys get a chance, I got this room open. Oh, shit. Are they garbage pale kids? All these cards?

This is incredible. What are your languages, Chris? What does Twidden know? Common draconic giant and undercommon. No, you don't recognize this text. Brian, Ken, what languages do your characters know? Infernal? Hmm.

I mean, it looks familiar, but no. I thought it was Spanish, but Portuguese. There'll be features and traits. Now, it's proficiency. It's on your first front page kind of lower than your, like, stats. it'll say armor, weapons, tools, languages. Okay. Celestial, common, elvish, halfling, thieves, can't.

I think they can't hear what. Yeah, you're unable to recognize the text. You can't play best of war or thieves can't dunk. None of you immediately recognize the language, but there's, of course, a chance you'll at least be able to figure out language it's supposed to be. Can I get a history check from everybody at the same time, please? Your history check. 18 for 20. 3 plus 7. 10.

Okay. For Zagrath. What did you get Brian? I said Zach Graf. Oh, you said at the same time as he said botch. Where'd you roll? I'm burp, Zach Graf, uh, 12. Yeah, none of you recognize the language. Well, we're great.

How about Mr. Peepers? Oh, yeah. Double check in. An elf and never forgets. He knows common, half-ling, Loxidon, and thieves can't. So the Kuwaito guys, they just know undercommon and common. They have no clue. Didn't those fish go to school?

I think Quentin's like, well, whatever it says, it'll all be carbon in just a moment. And he spits in his hands, get my firebolt all the second. It definitely has this alien organization kind of feel to it. Like there was a plan in action here, a conspiracy even. But there's these 200 samples of worms. that seem to be labeled and you think there was a purpose they were being organized for that you would really not like if you had been able to figure it out. So it sounds like maybe it's time for the fireworks. Everybody agree?

I mean, whatever they're doing, fuck them, right? Let's destroy their worms. Yeah, I'm no fan. So, Coli, you want to say something? Hmm. Before we destroy the rooms, or the room full of worms? Hey, I know those worms What?

Okay It's more Foster Brooks and Spagole even Hey, I'm so drunk Hey, I know those worms How about that? Yeah, let's destroy it Yeah, so We're the wriggly things

It's not my birthday Die worms you're mostly burning paper so i'm not going to make you roll to do this but you all seem your various fire implements at these rows and you know much like one of the only good moments in alien resurrection you light up the hall of genetic horrors and it just makes a screeching squealing sound as all the organic material inside this alien plastic starts to burn good well they don't call his heroes for nothing right

more calling arson I don't think they're both heroes should we continue down this hallway and see what else is the room at all or we're just going to well it's filled with fire they did sort of search the room I mean I think you were actually there for it and it just they mostly found like

it was a ritual that's happening going could completely decipher for there's a table in the north northeast and southeast corners is that right Dan? But yeah that's where we found those cards oh I thought yeah okay got it I thought we're on the room by yeah

so yeah room by what the room up top up to the left we came from there you came from there you've been in there okay we're moving south Moot and Don is hallway. All right. Do our sneaky,

stealthy friends want to stealth up and prevent us from getting murdered? Yes. Can I stealth up? Yeah.

Let's get a self-check from those who want to lead. You don't talk about darks or sturdy. Five plus 12, 17. Brian, do you want to sneak ahead with planes? Yes, of course. Sure. Sure.

of course. Smouth, jerk. Right. And where are we going? We're heading back. Holy Snikes. 31. Nice.

That's sneaky. Pretty stealthy. You're not entirely sure what might be around the corner, but you relatively silently sidle up to right about here, and you notice slime has also spilled over here, much like it did in a hallway a little bit. can I get a perception check from both of you, Brian and Blaine? That's not good. Uh-huh.

19 plus 10, 29. Jesus. I think it's... 25. Nice. My new shoe is going to be okay? Well, you both manage to duck back around the corner before it sees you, but there is some sort of large... slimy, pulsating, organic creature

a little bit down the hallway. How close did we come to beating that thing's ass? Say it again, Brian? How close did we come to beating that thing's ass? How much does, we've already put some damage on that, right? That guy? I don't think we fought this time. Oh, okay.

Okay, shit. Okay. But before it was shambling mounds, in the slimes. Right. Does it seem, do they potentially recognize it as a fellow shambling mound

like we've encountered before? What's your passive insight, Brian and Blame? Passive insight 20. Damn. That's right. Passive insight is low. It's just 12.

Okay. Blaine, you would have recognized that as a frog he myth. Oh, no. From the barrier beaks. We fought a frog kemuth once before. Remember, I think it kept swallowing Sarah or Ken or something like that. Back when we were on the ice boat, when we were the Ice Five,

a frog kemuth came out there and kept, I mean, it was a very difficult fight. I'm going to do the thing where a cat turns around and sees a cucumber behind it and jumps, four feet in the air and then scrambles back up the hallway and then I'm going to try to get under the refrigerator. I'll let you keep your good stealth scores as you head back up north. It was adorable, by the way. I thought it was... All right. Well,

they both go back to that slime room. Dan, earlier you said we thought we kind of where the witch thief queen was? Yes, I will give you a big old clear sign of where you think she is. I'm going to write in red with an arrow right where you think she is. Uh-huh. Oh, ho. That means going through so much slime, right?

Hmm. I don't want to f uh-huh. Well, we can, but we can, but we can. We may not be able to avoid this frog hemoth, but we get to at least decide how we fight it. Like, let's say we go back all the way around to where we first came from. Like, if you essentially sort of the center of the map,

we can, well, we'd have to go across slime there too. Yeah, slime everywhere. We burrow through the walls. Well, we may have to figure out. you're pretty sure whatever that frog heath was doing there, it would have a pretty clear eye line towards anywhere you would want to dig in this area. If we go back all the way up to the north end of this hallway into that room where there were the treasures and stuff like that,

and then make our way east to sort of that circular kind of thing, which is sort of at the top of the stairs where the slime was piling up, Mm-hmm. Maybe, like, it doesn't seem like we get to avoid slime, but if we go there, maybe we can experiment with the slime. Bless you. Excuse my sneeze. Maybe we could go up there and experiment with the slime

without the pressure of the frog hemoth. You know what I mean? The slime may not end up being poisonous, but if it has any kind of effects, I kind of feel like we would want to figure that out, without having to be in the middle of a frog hemit that can swallow us? Does that make sense to folks? Go back the way we came and at least see what the slime is.

Because we've been trying to stay out all that stuff. Right, Dan, we haven't really touched the slime, have we? Yeah, it got on you a little bit when you were having that shambling mound fight you recently mentioned. Do we call any? avoided like falling in. You were like, we're not falling in this. Off of what Chris was saying, we go back like to this area. We go to the, like where the rounder is.

Let's say you're in the room. Let's say you're already in the room. Okay. But I'm saying that we could go this hallway here and pinging down here. And then this right here looks like a door. Do you see where I'm hitting there? I don't see where you're pinging from. I'm not getting it paying this time.

Top of the screen. Top right. Oh, yeah, you haven't explored that whole. Yeah, you're right. We haven't gone there at all. That's a good point. I mean, we can figure out how to get through the slime that's down here because there's a doorway here. And we were already in this big room where the shambling mounds were.

Yeah. But we can kind of get down and around because we have to go down to the south part of this whole thing to get to the where the thief queen is. Right. And if we can not have to take out the frog hemoth, that's a good thing. Or at least we know it's there and we can, we can, you know,

burn that frog when we come to it. I think you're right. Let's go, let's follow that hallway unexplored all the way to the east at the top. Let's just see what's up there. Yeah. I get a perception check from everybody if that's what you're doing.

Could I give advantage, or not advantage, can I give guidance if we're knowingly sort of? Sure, yes, yes. For investigation, you said? No, perception because I didn't know it was investigation level awareness. I got a 19 plus 10, 29. Okay. Nice. I got a 23.

I like these characters. We always roll in the 20s. It's great. Was this rolled 12? Perception. Well, okay. 12 16

I'll finally see my shit again I don't know what the fuck's going on but I like it Blaine you're going to get to where did your token go I'm at the end of the hallway where that door is yeah you're not at the end of the hallway actually

I know that's where you want to be but I'm this is not a gimmie you're going to be right I'm trying to get your token to move I'm just going to let you do it yeah right about there okay and you sort of see through the corner of your eyes your face approaches the eye line there is another frog hewit also squatting in the deep slime here just around the corner and I'll show you another frog hemus token okay and can I it's can I see if it sees us, do I, can I vibe that it's like,

you don't think it saw you, but you think it like could be in a resting state. You weren't prioritizing stealth, but with that high of a perception check, rather than make you also roll stealth, I'm just taking into account you saw it really fast. Okay. I'm going to alert the guys,

you're going to say, there's a giant frog around the corner. One of the frog's going to go around, wow, wow, wow, now, and, uh, And then I would like to, if I could, maybe sprint past with my cat speed. Yeah, do it. Chris, were you going to suggest something now? I was going to say when you came back to say there's another frog heath,

it was like, maybe we should make sure the doors behind us are closed so that if we do start some altercation with one frog hemith, the other one doesn't come up behind us. You know what I mean? Like, let's close that door back in the treasure room and stuff just to make sure. we're not going to get swallowed. Okay. And you're all going to just run across?

I think that's Blaine. Maybe the rest of us should just be ready to attack. Because if it comes up and then it's potentially in this sort of T, Blaine's on one side. The rest of us are on the other. That's not great for Blaine. No, if, Blaine, if what you want to do is run past but try not to be seen, I would let you choose either an athletics check with a disadvantage or a stealth check with disadvantage.

You could choose which. I would do a stealth because I might have a 12 stealth. Plus 12? Can I give you guidance? Yeah. I chose the right thing for this to be a physics-wise, accurate. Okay. I'm going to do with disadvantage.

That's a 7th with plus 12. That's a 19. Yeah. And a 2 plus 12 is a 14. Okay. But I'm doing it anyway. I don't give a fuck. I'm using my cat speed. You're doing it past the right kind of monster. I don't know if you'll see all the stats on Roll 20, but a froggy myth is pretty stupid. So that's mean. It rolls a 12 on its perception against your stealth, and you manage to dart across very quickly.

Okay, good. someone just humming the beginning of a beautiful Chuck Mangione song or did you want to chime in with something? Mm-hmm. Blaine, you get across. Everyone else, you feel like you could either sneak or do the same thing or wait. I'm not super sneaky, unfortunately. Are you guys sneaky? Maybe I'll throw up some kind of an illusion.

I'm also not sure if you wanted Blaine to just like be scouts. ahead of everybody. Yeah, if you're comfortable with that plane, if you want to sort of look ahead. I'll allow the meta of you would have decided on that before he got out of ear shot. Yeah. That's what you all want to do.

Yeah, I'm kind of, I'm just going to do some advanced cat scouting. I'm going to go out into the yard and make sure I don't run into coyotes. Shalop can still do the illusion thing, but it sounds like he would have done it with the awareness. That's what Siam did or was planning to do. Would you let him just sort of go ahead before you start throwing up something else that could be engaging. I'm sorry?

Yeah, I'm just... Yeah, I'm just... Yeah, I see if I can describe this again. You had said that you might want to do an illusion, but if you knew that Blaine's character was trying to just scout ahead and maybe come back rather than bring everyone with him, would you still do an illusion, or would you wait? No, I would wait.

Okay. So Blaine, you're going to keep stealthing down the hallway and just try to get to that last room? Yes. Just to scope it out? Yeah, I'm going to see if that's a door. It is a door. As you approach, you can tell.

It is much like many of the doors here, a heavy wooden door with an iron ring on it. And there is a large iron keyhole. Oh, well, you know, I have the Demir Guild key and the Demir Key Rune. Do any of those seem like something that would. that would work in these doors. They do. Oh my God. Dan!

How many episodes have you been sitting on that one, you goof? You know what? It just occurred to me. Because I didn't know that this was a... Anyway, I'm going to... Yeah, you're sure what the... I'm going to do a quick check for traps with this. Okay.

So, as you approach, you can tell, it is a very horrific key as you take it out, there's some sort of mind flayer engraved on it and you do an investigation check to check for traps. Okay. 9 plus 11, 20.

Yeah, there's a very old, ancient physical trap that seems set if you put the wrong thing in the keyhole. It is a very large but familiar looking keyhole. Do an insight check. 15 plus 10, 25.

Okay. You don't think that a normal iron key would quite fit in there, that there would be a little bit too much space as you kind of look in. But you look at some of the tightness organic material that looks like spines coming off of the key. And you think, oh, this one of these spines might actually go in the keyhole. Okay. You know what? I'm going to wait for everybody to get down here. Okay. I'm going to do the gomer pile whistle.

Hootie-hoo! Hootie-hoo! Let everybody know that everything looks clear down here. Can I get a deception checkplay? To try to make it sound more hooty-hoo than... How about 11? Hootie-hoo! Yeah, pretty much. You guys hear in like a dad joke voice, so I am.

saying who-dy-who. Meow. But in all serious, since he is trying to be subtle, so he's walking down to the corner, logic-wise, just sort of try to, like, tiptoe over and wave everybody over.

Yeah. You guys were not yet worrying about shutting the door, so one of you would have heard him with your passive perception. You're not sure if something heard Blaine or not. What would you like to do? Listen and see if the frog hemith is responding. I guess we'll have to find out if the froggy myth is responding

in our next episode of NerdBoker. Blaine, this is coming out a week from today. You got plugs? Oh, I have a week from today. You know, Lucha Vovum at the Fox Theater in Pomona on Valentine's Day. Come on out and come on out and bring your love. And a mini will land in it.

And that love can be you or mushrooms. Yeah, either or. Just don't drive. You don't need a date, right? Yeah. Here's the date. February 14th. Nois.

As promoted last week, I'm going to be kicking off the launch crowdfunding for Darkestwimsy.com. Come check it out. Blaine. Get them. We attribute. The success saved man, Colleen, for joining us on this episode. You got walls and a roof.

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