Nerd Poker - The Fog Campaign - Episode 70

Episode Date: May 12, 2026

The Ding Dong Danglers, if we can call them that, continue to smack the lich around while the leviathan gobbles up the fishfolk. Also, oh Episode 70. Remember 69? And Episode 71 is so far away, by which we mean only one finger is in use right now. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com

Hey, it's Brian Possein. Nerd Poker. We're calling it. The Svald Campaign. My friends are here. Chris, Blaine, Ken, engineer Sam, and of course,

our kick-ass DM, Dan Telfer. Welcome to Nerd Poker. Hey, everybody. It's Brian Persane. Nerd Poker is what we're doing. Episode 70 with my friends. We got to Zoom. this week, unfortunately, can't get our schedules together to play in my living room while my dog

farts. But we're all here on the Zoom thing. Ken is here. Hi. Hey pal. Chris is here. Hello. Lane. Hey, hi. Jan, what's up? up. Hey, we two to scoot, right? Sure. And running the show from the cool part of town, as always. It's Sam, everybody. Hello, sweet children. Outline trio, nice.

That's right. Alcaleen. That's right. Yes, from the old country. Seen him live in the old days. They were really great lives. Yeah, they're great. Episode 70 of the Fog campaign, we should.

should thank some people. Am I right? Or am I wrong? Yeah. I mean, why wouldn't we, right? Just like for fun, just like recreationally. Hi, everybody. We are appreciative of all of you who listen, but those of you at our top two tiers of support on Patreon have usernames like

Firm RIP. Thank you, Firm Rips, so firm, ripping it so hard. Thank you, Dr. Duck Butter. Thank you, Chris Bacos. Thank you, Bongston, two joints, Tender Kroach. Thank you, name. Thank you. Thank you. Come be a zookeeper.

Thank you. I've heard it before, it's still funny. Thank you. I like one ones that have been around for years. I still make y'all laugh. Thank you. My name is Ames McKenzie, and I hate Vans. But why?

Thank you. Thank you, Litch Astley, never going to give you up from nerd poker. Thank you, Luke, the Husbatron, Jib Javis Prime. Thank you, Randicles. Thank you, WV, French Fried. Thank you, New Me. And also, finally, thank you, Bronson Pinchot's Above Ground Pool. Blaine, who are those supporters brought to us by?

Sports brought to us by Toblerone. Only $12,000 at the Sacramento Hilton Mini Bar, Toblerone. and leaf blower. Wake the fuck up and stay the fuck up. Leafblower. Dan? Thank you, Blaine. Well, where we last left our heroes was mid-combat, not just mid-combat, but mid-turn order.

We paused after Shalab went last, is what I have in my notes. You guys are in the middle of fighting not only a Leviathan, but the Litch Queen. and the Leviathan's tentacles. You're in a massive pool of water. I've done my best to find a good, decent, large, open water map on Roll 20. It was definitely trying to just give myself a break here and not make it bigger than Brian's table, but I, for whatever reason, had not anticipated this would need translating.

So there's some debris in there. I believe right now, Tuddin is the only one of the one. on top of it, but a couple of you have been on top of it and duck behind it. Tuddin's been going from chunk to chunk, if I'm not mistaken, Chris. And... Chunk to chunk. Yeah. It's my favorite slow dance song from junior high.

The tentacles have had a couple of them have been severed. The water's rising. At some point, you're hoping you'll see a hole in the ceiling, but right now you can't, even with dark vision, see the sides of this chamber or the ceiling because of just how vast it is. This is the chamber you came down into the undercity through, though. You just lowered yourselves across a vast distance. It's now filling with water. Before we get to the NPCs who are next in the turn order, do you guys have any questions catching up? How do we beat this thing? Well, let's see. It's a water Pokemon. What's good against water Pokemon?

Dirt. Grass Cat Detective Pikachu Pokemon are like Digimon Except with two fingers up your ass Yeah Franchise didn't take off, did it?

Do you guys ever play like It's made of liquid? It's It's What do you mean it's a water pump demon? The Leviathan I'm making a joke If you were in Rule 20

You could see that it's also just a monster With a token Which for whatever reason reminds me Of like Pokemon cards or something and like I don't even remember what I was saying before we got into Pokemon town but uh

oh you were asking if we had questions yeah do you um isn't the litch like turned or something like that I feel like there's a yeah I think she she's she's uh is it how does it turn

undead work let's pull that I don't know if somebody, I don't think any of us can turn on dead, but something happened to her. Did I, I'm looking at, did I do a status conditions? Yeah, did you do something, Blaine? Did I do a wand of pyrotechnics and blind her or something? Yeah, there was something going on where she was no longer in control of the Leviate, like she was kind of out of commission. Or is it fantastical force?

I know. I know you use the wand of pyrotechnics to distract the Leviathan and make it attack an area kind of close to where Ken currently is, or at least focus on that area as opposed to, like, when you were all clustered in the back. Right. And you were coming around the side plane. So I have you up here, because that's where I last saw your token, but I know at one point you were down sort of the southeast corner of this map.

Yeah, I feel like I was, I was moving kind of just trying to stay out of range. I think you had Spicoli flying also. Uh, someone cast, or who cast, I, I am. flying. I think I had Yeah, that sounds right. I'm definitely not flying. And Blaine is

not flying. He is catfish. Trying to think of what happened to the Litch Queen because I have like a photo of where we left this off and I know her little mini was off to the right a little bit but I thought that's just because I couldn't keep her

balanced on top of the Leviathan Mini and she was riding it originally. I'm looking back through I'm trying to find in the yeah like notes I have because none of this is in role 20 we all did this in person this is the tricky part of going from

in person oh yeah that's true but we would have had to figure some of this out anyway I don't have any like active conditions all right let's get going but I think you might be right sorry I don't have the previous episode

but we haven't published the last episode yet, so I don't have the audio for it yet, or I would have done some double-checking. You think she was blinded? Does anyone remember, like, yeah, I mean, like, does anyone remember, do it? Yes, I did remember that. No, no, somebody were.

Yeah, so we did some to her. In flesh. Okay. Yes. I'm looking back through, like, the only thing I could do something like that is a spell that I have not cast, which is, like, Fantasmo Force.

a hypnotic pattern? You might have done hypnotic patterns. That's what it was. It was hypnotic pattern. Okay. I'm going to give her the blinded condition. The creature, oh, she's charmed. She's charmed, yeah.

On a failed save, the creature becomes charmed for a minute. While charmed, she's incapacitated and has a speed of zero. That sounds absolutely correct. Spell ends if she takes damage or someone else uses an action to shake her out of her stoop war. So now my chance to hit the Leviathan so that we don't wake her up. I think that's kind of what we've been doing is focusing on monster and arms. Was she charged?

She is immune to charmed as a witch. Oh, there you go then. So something else must have been happening. Oh, because it was incapacitated. That's sort of where your head was at. Yes. Okay, we can do that. Thank you for helping.

And let's go ahead and give these little fishy boy friends of yours a turn in the turn order so we can sort of wrap up the bottom chunk of the turn order and get to y'all. So the Kuatoha sorcerer named Golk is now going to... That's made up. try to cast it is made up these are all fantasy characters I don't know if I've mentioned

they don't have a life outside of this game it's like Indian in the cupboard when you guys shut the door I'm meeting Spacoli for coffee later oh yeah yeah he's real real thing Pete's

Pete's Phil's coffee beans what do you think yeah Pete's playing you're in Sacramento, go to Temple. Oh. Where's Temple? There's several locations. It's the best coffee in the country, and it's only, it's, it's, it's, it's,

roaster is centered in Sacramento. Oh, okay. Nice. They have a couple of, like, you get yourself a little latte or a bag of coffee. It's been around forever, and it's downtown. They had one downtown. Yeah, there's one downtown, and then there's like one kind of off in, um, What is it called where Ronald Reagan used to live?

Yeah. The sleep train? The fabulous 40s, I believe, is what it's called, that neighborhood. All right, so the arch priest is going to cast destructive wave. Cool. Uh-oh. Destructive energy ripples outward from you in a 30-foot emanation, each creature. You choose in the emanation makes a constitution saving throw on a failed save.

They take a shitload of thunder and radiant damage. So they're going to do their concert. Hello? Hello? This is my domino? Mr. Herbert. Hey, you, Mr. Herbert. You have a telephone called the front desk. It's our old friend potential spam. Oh, God.

It's amazing how I haven't figured out how to stop those calls. I can report spam every time, and guess what? Nine more on the way. How do they get my number? You get on lists and shit, you know? Oh, yeah.

I know. That's going to be a fail and a success to get your name off the spam list. Hmm? So, 24 points of radiant damage to the litch. To the lich?

Or thunder damage. Radiant damage is coming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, she would no longer then be incapacitated. Hmm. Good to know. Thanks for the hot tip.

and half of that, I believe. 5D6 Radiant. So 15. All right. So Lich is going to just get smashed with this destructive wave and she will fall off because she's getting hit

with this specific spell. It doesn't necessarily knock someone back but she was just incapacitated and then smashed with a wave. So I'm going to say she would fall off her precarious position and she will plunk in the opposite side of the viviathan from when you guys are out.

The Leviathan's going to take some damage, but not nearly as much as she just took. And this may surprise you, but the Leviathan has a lot more hit points than she does. So we're going to go ahead and melt in almost ready for y'all. D-Doo-Doo-Dil Peepers is up and he, oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Gulk is all, Gulk went and then, what's the other guy's name? Glug. Glug still has to go. He's going to chop at this tentacle.

I love that Golg and Glug routine where Dave's not here. One's a miss. One's a crit. So he's just going to rip into this thing for... It's going to be 11 plus 25 points of damage. Against the Leviathan? against one of its tentacles he's trying to cut it down.

It's lost a couple of you guys have managed to chop at. Dan, do the tentacles, I don't know if you can reveal this, do the tentacles count as a separate hit point pool than the Leviathan? Are they sort of like separate monsters in a way? Yeah, I gave them separate hit points

because that way you can cut them off, uh, narratively speaking, under specific terms, under specific number of hip points, and that it's easily trackable. So I guess there's a certain amount that's fun if I keep a secret,

but I can reveal that I gave each of the tentacles the same amount of hip points and that it is significantly less than the Leviathan's hip points, but it still adds up to its total hip points. Six seven. Yay! Pryphor, p.

And then we're going to have tentacles go. One's a botch. Ah, it's going to tickle itself. It's going to swing and hit one of the chunks of debris. And take

boop, boop, boop. Five points of bludgeoning damage. We are going to have a 32 to hit against Glug, which is going to smart.

Oh, thank goodness. He only takes 18 points, but he's not looking great. Oh, motherfucker, he says. And then we have a 25 to hit against Ken. That's a look at the case. Ken is not here for this. Okay.

22 points of bludgeoning damage. Shit. Let's see. Can I dodge that shit? Yeah, if you got the uncanny dodge, now's the time to give it a peekaboo. I'm gonna do it. Canny dodge?

Low APR on the ramp. You're a sorcerer, right? Oh yeah, no, no, no, never mind. You're not a rogue like a couple of these, these sassy boys. I was looking at my last game. Ken, you should spin so that the guy hits your... Was it 22 points? Yeah, boss.

It's in the scroll, too, if you need it as a reference. And you're like me and you forget numbers right after you hear them. And then that is going to be a 33 to hit against Lil Peepers. Little Peepers is going to take. Ouch, is that right roll? No, it's not. One moment.

Take out. Why is it not going? Hang on. Sorry, folks. I'm hitting the roll button on D&D Beyond. It's not translating over to roll 20. You can roll 4. D.C. There you go.

Oh, 28 points for Little Peeper. is Jesus Hache. I carumba! He says. You sure do. Brian, you are up. Eat my shorts, I said. And Brian, he's got a 35 in initiative roles, which good Christ.

I have this some good Christ. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. Let me just read this real quick. Blame, while I read a power app. The power I have. Well, he reads what powers he has. We like to thank our sponsor, Hamster Balls. They're weird.

I'm not going to lie. A little too weird. Hamster balls. But not the kind they run around in. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to try this. Am I close enough to do chill touch on this, Dan? On the Litch?

I'm checking the range on that bad boy. I haven't fucked around with it. Well, you're going to find out. I'd love to. I'd love to. It is a range of 120 feet and you are 115, Brian. Nice. Cool.

Wow. I'm going to try that. So what it does is it receives 1D10 of necrotic damage, and then I think it can't regain hit points for a while, Nice, holy shit. Yeah, so low that spell attack, Brian. Cool. Oh, nice.

23. Cool, that'd be a hit. And me. 23. Oh, my goodness. Oh, Jesus. Ah. This has got nothing to do with it.

A website that told me about my paternal grandfather's secret family. Ha, ha, ha, nice. Five. how you had to do was jerk off into an AI. I forgot my grandmother was Norwegian and Swedish still. I thought she was just Swedish,

but nope. She was also Norwegian, right down the middle. Thanks, 23 and me. Yeah, 23 and Me was a real fucked up website. To bed they sold all of our data and made me want to pull all of them. Delete my saliva.

I thought I went with ancestry. All right, so they now can't regain any hit points to start the next turn, which for a litch who can cast regenerative spells and is undead, that is pretty handy. Anything else for your turn, Brian? I, you know, I never really take advantage of this, but maybe I do some kind of, you know, because I am a slight a hand guy and also an acrobat. I do some kind of magical thing or some like, more like a Vegas magician kind of thing.

A flourish? Yeah, dude, like a flourish. and then I step back. All right, Brian, can you show us over Zoom what the flourish would look like? God, it's my least favorite part of D&D. The people? Yes.

Nice. Wow. Did I get a screen grab of that? I sure did. Thank you for that. You look like that Australian woman that won the breakdance competition. Oh, she didn't know why.

She lost, right? How dare you? Yeah, she didn't do too well. Do you see Eric and Kirk in the Rhythm Nation outfit? Oh, Jesus Christ. Back, it is time for the Leviathan to go. It is going to attempt to grapple gulke. Grapple gulp.

The Incredible gulk? Yep, the incredible gulke. That is exactly what's happening. make some angry oh boy and so that's going to be a grapple this is not great apple dapple

dabble dabble all it can do on its turn it might be I haven't busted out the legendary actions yet that's going to be fun

in a moment um now it based off of the sort of home brewing I've done that's actually all it can do but that's because I gave all those moves to the tentacles

it has multi-attack but I broke it up up over tentacles, if that makes sense. So I'm not letting him do multiple things. And that's going to take us around the bend, Blaine Your Up. Hello, credence. I'm going to firebolt this tentacle right here,

like the base, see if I can burn it, like an upside down matchhead. Is that tentacle taking any damage yet? Which one are you talking about? You're kind of between all of them equidicidistantly Almost. This one, the guy, it has not taken any damage. And it is smacking around your friend, little. Okay.

I saw upside down match head open for Toad de Wet Sprocket. That's a 16 plus 6, 22 to hit. Ooh, that's a hit. Holy cow. Then 2D10. It's a 9 in a 9, 18. Nice. And what attack is this?

That's a, I guess firebolt is a, is it a, is it fire? Yes, spell attack. Or fire. Yeah, yeah, I'm looking for spell or attack types because it'll, if it's a certain attack type, you can sever the tentacle as opposed to having it flop lifelessly into the water. Does that make sense? Yes. So if it heals, it can kind of like flex the tentacle back in the life, but if you cut it off,

it's not going to regrow it in combat. Anything else for your turn? I guess that's it. I'm going to just try to swim out of range, I guess. Okay. Of these things. I can't afford to take any real damage here. I can't seem to move my token.

Oh. Here, let me see if I can fix that. That should be an easy fit. It says it is controlled by Blaine. C, which is your login. So where we're, will you ping where you want it and I'll move it for you? Maybe it'll suddenly take that self to life.

Over here a little bit. Okay, dokey. Then it'll be the Litches turn. She is going to cast Fireball. A large... The large shot of cinnamon schnapps. She cast... I declined the rest of my statement.

Let's see. I yield my time. There's a gentleman from West Virginia. So it's a 20-foot radius sphere. She is going to want to hit. It's going to be Twiddin. I'm going to see the Eagles at the 20-foot radius sphere. Twiddin and Shalab.

Please roll a dexterity save the toe. All right. I'm not going to. like it. 14. Six. Yes, we are looking for 20, unfortunately.

That's not good enough. No, and I'm going to have to roll the damage manually, which is 8D6. Oh, I should be fine. Let's see how this could possibly hurt.

8-1s. 27 points of fire damage. A meteor-like orb of flame smashes into you, too. How are you doing on hit points, y'all? Dan, as a reaction, I'm going to cast absorb elements. Ooh, okay, how does that work? I have resistance, so it'll be halved, the triggering damage,

and then I get to add some of that fire damage to, if I do a melee attack in my next turn. Oh, excellent. I like that. All right. So you said it was how much? How much was it, buddy? 28.

How much was it, buddy? 27? I'm trying to put it all in the roll 20 scroll to in case it helps. And what was that? Ken, you think you have a resistance to? Yeah, I'm looking to fire, I think.

Where the hell is it? Were you going to say something else, Chris? No, I just wanted to confirm the damage. So taking half of it with just 13. Nice. No, I'm resistant to lightning. Okay. Uh,

Lightning, the fire of lightning spells. So that's gonna be the liches turn to leave. And it'll take us to the next first. Chris, Chris, you're up. Oh, I'm seething with fire. Um, uh, I'm going to, uh, I'm going to, uh, as an, action can I do unsubbed oh it's a bonus action all right as a bonus action I'm going to you do unsettling words I'm going to spend one of my bardic inspirations against the litch okay so for that

I have to roll with the eight okay what level is this spell it's not a spell it's a thing I can do as a as a as a bard as a bonus action yeah I can expend one of my bardic inspiration and choose a creature I can see within 60 feet. I rolled the D8. There, got a six. So the litch must subtract six from the next saving through it makes. Ooh. And that lasts until the start of my next turn. So basically, uh, from until the beginning of my next turn, it subtracts six from a saving through. But let's see, can I cast a spell against it? Um, um, I. I'm going to cast a command against it,

which is a Wisdom DC-17 saving throw, so subtract six from this wisdom save. It's making. What level is command? It can be any level. I think it doesn't matter if I level it up. Let me just check and see it. It'll matter because she is going to cast countershell.

Oh, counter spell copy. You can affect one additional creature. Yes, so I guess it would just be at, first level because I'm just trying to get her. Okay, so that would be, I believe, an 11 DC uh, casting it.

Right? Wait, you attempt to interrupt a creature the process cast a spell. If the creature is cast a spell of third level or lower, its spell fails and has no effect. Got it. Okay, boom. It just gone.

We have a little, we have a little magic battle. Pabush! She throws an arm up as a reaction. Anything else for your turn? No, but my question would be because she countered spell, would the gift of a lacquer or whatever,

would my unsettling word still affect her potentially, still be in effect for someone else to get her? Okay. So everybody know that if you do a spell against her for now, she has a minus six to it. So you have a, she's vulnerable to spell saving throws right now. That's going to change my attack then. And then I guess that was a bonus action.

No, that was it. That was it. Cool. Cool. Ken, you're up. I hear you have some thoughts on your next attack. Yeah, and I did see that I am resistant to fire, so I adjusted. Oh.

Yeah, the damage was 27 if you want to knock a half of that. Got it. That's a lot of light and damage for you. To have. To have. I am going to. Yes. I'm going to do it, Ken.

Summon a dragon. Wait a minute. People can actually do this, but I don't believe it. Then I will summon it. What do you do? How used to what? I'm casting summon dragon. What a cool thing.

All right. So let's see how this works. Can you read this description? Yes. Don't summon Daryl Dragon. What's that? I've seen this from a player character that I've run a game for outside of the podcast, but I have not seen one of y'all do it.

You call forth a dragon spirit. It manifests in an unoccupied space that you can see within range and uses the draconic spirit stat block. Cool. Creature disappears when it drops to zero hit points or when the spell ends. Creatures is an ally to you and your allies. In combat, the creature shares your initiative count, but takes its turn immediately after yours. It obeys your verbal commands.

No action required by you. If you don't issue any, it takes the dodge action and uses its movement to avoid danger. Cool. And can you ping where you wanted? I have a token for this. It's a silly token. Yeah, I have a token. Go back there.

That's a silly token, you. I know it's very whimsical And I will give you control of the token Hopefully you'll be able to use it I know Blaine has some control issues You should see a doctor about that But I think you should have access To wiggling that one around

Sweet Then I will I guess that's the end of my turn And then I will have an attack Wait wait a second You'll have an attack from the dragon to me Yeah well it's it's the next It's in the turn order, so.

I'll put it in there. Summending it was my turn, and then this will be the dragon's term. So, Draconic Spirits, let's see. It has, it's a large dragon. AC is 14 plus the spells level. What level did you cast that at? Five. Okay, so 19.8C.

Pretty good. And that is, 50 hit points. Cool. Let's hear what it does. Summated a drag into a dark cavern filling with water. It's kind of neat. So what do I do to roll its attack?

It's a spirit. It already died. You guys killed it in another adventure or something. Oh. Weird. Let me see. How does it attack? It must be excited to help us.

I had you guys all wrong. Here, let me breathe on top before you. I mean, we'll say it was a different character, right? I'm trying to figure out how it attacks. Thank God. Draconic spirit? That's what it's called? Yeah.

Yeah, it's listed as draconic spirit. It's also in the summon dragon spell description on D&DVion. Oh, okay. You have multi-attack, so you can use rend and your breath weapon. Okay, terrific. Rhinertex able to half the spells level. Yeah, it does make you do math to figure out what it's to hit is, which is rude. I'll say.

Uh, well, two, it would be, spells level, so... Oh, there you go. Well, you got a bunch of stuff you can do. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm just going to do breath weapon, I think. Cool. D.C. enters your stuff. Spell save DC.

Okay. So, wait, my. You get to do some rending and some breath weaponing. That's cool. Sure. Okay. Here I, here I rend. Rent fourth.

So that's 1d6 plus four plus the spells level. So, all right. Do do do do. Do do. So that's five plus four is nine plus five is nine plus five is 19. Excellent. Against which one, did you say? Oh, against the Big Mama.

They can both be classified as Big Mamas, but you mean the Leviathan, yes? Yeah. That's a hit, yeah. AC-18. Wait, Ken, that was your damage. Yes. That was my damage. Your spell of attack modify, you have to roll to hit.

Yeah. Oh, shit. Thank you. Uh, Herclap. Let me see. We also have a... test. We're supposed to have tests.

He said we're having tests. He's only filled in one bubble per line. ScanTrump, are you kidding me? Well, never mind. That didn't happen. I botched. Oh. Oh, I think I need you to recognize it did happen and roll a D-100, Ken.

Yeah. That's a 36. Oh, that's not so bad. It's just going to be a miss. All right. And then let me do the... weapon now. The dragon bites its foot on. You get two wrens, don't you? You get to rend a couple times. Oh. Okay.

The spirit makes a number of rendit texts equal to half the spells level round down. So that's level five and then rounded down. That's two. Two. So that is 10 plus eight, 18. That's a hit. Ooh. Cool. And then. So it's, it is, what is it, D6 plus four plus the level. Ah, mathy maths. Maths, maths, maths. So that's five plus four is nine, plus five, nine, uh, fourteen.

Ooh, all right. So, and you're biting it? You're having the draconic spirit bite it. It's in breathwrap. Those were wrens. Now you have a breath. Oh, Rens, you're right. Yes.

Clawing or biting, yes. I'm having it fly right up in its face, taking off those hip points, and then it also gets a breath weapon. Holy crap. I mean, you send it a dragon. You're a dragon, baby. Rens.

Oh, and it uses a breath weapon. Yeah, okay. Ken, behold the glory of what you've done. I know. It's crazy. Okay, so that's a... No, it's got to make a save for breath weapon. 20...

Oh, okay. These creature in that area must make a deck save against your spell safety, C-can. Yeah, let's see. Okay. But joint, I'm afraid that is a crit 27 deck save. Half. Half damage.

Yep. What type of damage? What type of damage? Lightning. Ooh. Okay. So, Kadoosh. It wiggles around, doesn't take full damage.

Did you roll the damage, Ken? You did not? I believe you'll take half of this. 2D6, that's what it says. Okay. Thank you, 2D6. So that's three. So one.

Notchy, machi. Another great attack that was. Another classic attack from your summon dragon named Chim Chim? Jim? Yeah.

Oh. Brother of Cham. Okay, okay. That's going to bring Bobby Glug up. He's going to rip at the tentacle one more time. Like I said,

he's beat up a bit. It's going to be a couple of hits. Tenticle is going to go down. And the aren't. Arch priest is going to cast a destructive wave again.

Which tentacle is this, Dan? It was the one in the southeast corner. I'm pinging where it used to be. I've deleted the token. And what was I doing? Destructive wave. Con saves. Con saves for the two mamas.

Switch. That's the Leviathan. for a couple of saves. That means it is going to take only half of the thunder and radiant. But that would have been 19 points of thunder and 17 points of radiance, so they're both still going to take a fair chunk. And that's going to bring us

around to Will Peepers. Will Peepers has been having a fuck of a time. He's going to start stabbing at that tentacle in front of him again. but he is the lowest of all the NPCs on hit points. He's kind of just, you know, doing a little bit of like a frantic doggy paddle between attacks. He's this tiny little halfling, elephant person. But here comes the old short sword. 25 to hit.

I'd say above average. And there's not going to be sneak attack damage. That's 12 points of piercing damage. Tenticle is starting to get ripped up. The one that is flailing around in front of him. And as a bonus action, I'll try to stab with his dagger. That's a miss. It's now tentacle time.

Stop. Tenticle time. Oh, oh, oh, oh. A 35 to hit, a 30 to hit and a 33 to hit. Wow. So first one's going to hit Lil Peepers. It's going to take 26 points of bludgeoning damage. I have not many more, he would say.

If he weren't dead. Ken, 30 to hit. Can I use Silvery Barbes on the one versus Ken? It's my reaction. Oh, wait. I can't because I already used my reaction and it hasn't been my turn yet. Never mind. Okay.

Sorry, Ken. I tried to help you. Yeah. Ken, that is 27 points of bludgeoning damage. It didn't roll a crit. Correct. Okay. 27 points of damage against me.

I am dead. You mean down? Sure. Whatever you want to call it. There is a difference in Dungeons and Dragons between dead and unconscious. you are unconscious. And there goes my dragon. Brian 33 to hit.

God damn you. Yes, that hits. I will be damned. Thank you. 27 points of bludging. Oh, man, that's a lot. Brian, I think you can uncanny dodge that, right? Uncanny dodge, yeah, I think so.

You robes, I believe, can do that. Okay. So what do I do? How's the damage. down to Dan, would that be 13? Uh, yep. Do I have to roll it? No.

It's a, nope, just automatically, okay. It's a reaction you can have as a road, yeah. All right, cool. So how many points? 13. That's not bad. Uh, I'm hurting, but I'm hanging in there. Kent's dead.

Yeah. Yeah. What can we do to say? Unconscious. I'm just down. I'm just down. I'm not dead. He can,

be saved is the important part. We got you, Ken. There's, I need one hit point and there's, I need resurrection cast on me. So there's a difference. And then it's going to take us around to the top of the turn order. But we are at pause time. So we have to see what happens on our next session of dangers and durdens. So far, fantastic.

My first session of Darkest Whimsie is live on YouTube and places where you get audio podcasts. Do you come check it out? I have a couple of gigs coming up. I've got Denver. I've got Comedy Works. One of my favorite clubs in the country. I've got Springfield Comedy Club in Springfield, Missouri, with both those shows. or with J.T. Habersat.

I've got some other stuff coming up this summer. There's a GalaxyCon in New Orleans in July. I can't wait. That's going to be super fun. And then I've also got Comic Con, obviously, in July. Looks like we're going to have a big Stewart Fails and Save the Universe panel and show, like, the first two episodes. They're just starting to be released.

I just was in Mexico City and did a big thing there. The press got to see one episode. People are stoked on it, so I can't wait for people to see it. That's it for me. Bridepressane.com, as always. Pick up some nerd poker merch, please. We've got new stuff coming out soon. Blaine.

We attribute the success saved mankind. for me. We're joining us on this episode. You got walls and a roof. Well... Hey, it's time for nerd poker mailbag. Dear nerd poker. It's...

It sounds like, wait, wait. There was again. Oh, Jesus. Hello? Okay, anyway. Connie from the Homeowners Association is really on my tips about your dumpster lid. And she wanted me to... What's...

Hello? Anybody... Anybody there? Okay. Okay, you guys, now I'm really officially freaked out. Did you hear that? No, we didn't. I don't all do nerd poker.

Thanks for listening to another episode of Nerd Poker. You can follow us at patreon.com slash nerd poker, and you get bonus episodes from there. And you can also send us anything at P-O-Box 1609 and Cino, California, 911. Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening.