New Heights with Jason and Travis Kelce - Andrew Santino on Caleb Williams Draft, John Cena Down Under & Jason's Stand-Up Future | Ep 87

Episode Date: April 24, 2024

92%ers we are back with another special guest episode of New Heights sponsored by Buffalo Wild Wings. Let’s Go Sports Bar! In this episode, we welcome comedian, actor, fellow podcaster, and Bad Friend Andrew Santino.  The guys get into Andrew’s snowy first impression of Jason, the origin of his “Cheeto” nickname, how Bobby Lee ruined the Bad Friends tour bus, Andrew’s wild Vegas golf outing with Justin Timberlake and Jimmy Fallon, and the exotic cuisine he tried down under with John Cena.  We also get to Travis’ “Fall Out Boy” incident when he guested on Santino’s show, discuss which comedians could make it in the NFL, the time Andrew punk’d Taylor Swift and Drake, and because this is football show we do eventually discuss the upcoming NFL draft.  There are also great stories about Pat Mahomes and his love of Coors Lights, Rob McElhenney donating a golf club to the LA River, some confusion over George Washington’s hair color, and of course, everyone’s favorite conspiracy theories.  We will be back with more New Heights every Wednesday during the offseason so make sure you’re subscribed to our YouTube Channel and wherever you get your podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and follow us on Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok for all the best moments from the show.  . . . Support the Show:   PRIZE PICKS: Download the app today and use code NEWHEIGHTS for a first deposit match up to $100  BUFFALO WILD WINGS: Right now, until April 30th, when you order with Buffalo Wild Wings GO, you can get 6 free wings with a minimum purchase of $10 and promo code GOWINGS.  TOMMY JOHN: If any of you 92%ers want to try Tommy John, go to https://www.tommyjohn.com/newheights and use code newheights for 20% off your first order. LA-Z-BOY: To score your very own custom recliner - enter the New Heights La-Z-Boy Giveaway — simply by following La-Z-Boy on Instagram and “liking” and commenting on one of their posts about the giveaway. And while you’re at it, check out https://www.la-z-boy.com/. Or stop into your local La-Z-Boy retailer to test one of these bad boys out.  SHADY RAYS: Go to http://shadyrays.com and use code NEWHEIGHTS for 50% off 2 or more pairs of polarized sunglasses. FARMER’S DOG: Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food at https://TheFarmersDog.com/newheights. Plus, you get FREE shipping!  ACCELERATOR: Every flavor of the Kelces’ favorite drink, Accelerator Active Energy, is available at Hyvee, Quiktrip, Giant Eagle, Amazon, and now Wawa.  https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/FB06B38E-F0C2-479F-9DA5-FD4A1C852B07?channel=NewHeights5SAVENOW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You set up your Wi-Fi in your garage? That's where the attachment point is. But you could have said put it somewhere else. I just haven't changed it yet. That's such an Ed Kelsey move. I'll get around to it. It's like that second floor bathroom. That's still not done. We had to watch dad take shits with the newspaper because he took the door off the hinges.

Like somebody bought a second floor bathroom in Cleveland Heights that a 12-year-old soldered the pipes. 90% sure I didn't know how to solder. Like why the fuck is the pipes jacked up up here on the second floor? Every week something's wrong with that bathroom. What could be the problem? It's like a 12 year old soldered this thing together. We've all soldered this thing together. Welcome back to New Heights, ladies and gentlemen, presented by Waves Sports and Entertainment and brought to you by Buffalo Wild Wings.

Let's go sports bar. A true, true American sports fan would know how to react to that just by hearing the intro. We are your hosts. I'm Travis Kelsey, this is my big brother Jason Kelsey out of Cleveland Heights, Ohio. New episodes come to you guys every Wednesday. Subscribe on YouTube and wherever you get your podcasts.

Follow the show on all social media at New Heights Show with 1S. But check out our official fan club at newheightsshow.com. We've got a very, very special episode for you guys today. Jason, why don't you do the honors and let the people know what they got coming up? That's right. We got an amazing episode for you, 92 Percenters.

We got the one and only stand-up comedian, actor, and podcaster out of Naperville North High School. Yeah, Naperville! You might know him from his stand-up hit specials, Home Field Advantage and Cheeseburger, or his acting roles on Dave, I'm Dying Up Here, and Ricky Stinnicky. He is also the host of hit podcast Whiskey Ginger and Bad Friends with Bobby Lee. And he finally stopped dodging our calls and agreed to stop by on our podcast this week.

Please everyone welcome Andrew Cheado Santino. You. You. You. You. this week, please everyone welcome Andrew Cheado Santino. You, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you,

you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you,

you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, was burned into my memory when you were like, yeah, my brother's gonna be there, you're gonna meet my brother. And it was at your house and we're partying, we're hanging out in the basement, we're kicking it, having a great night.

And I wanted to go upstairs to go make a phone call so I wasn't near the noise. And I see you, Jason was outside, it was snowing. I remember this. And he was laying outside on one of your deck chairs sleeping in the snow as it was snowing in a t-shirt and shorts, sleeping in the snow. And I was like, hey brother, you good?

And he was like, nah, nah, like that. And I go downstairs, I go, Trav, your brother is sleeping in the snow. And he goes, oh yeah, oh yeah. That's where he belongs. It's like no big deal. He's like, yeah, leave him alone, leave the bear alone. That's what you said, leave the bear alone, man.

Don't wake the bear. Whatever you do, don't wake the bear right now. You were passed out in the snow, but you were just catching a break from the party. You just wanted to break off, cool off a little bit. I was overheating. He was overheating. It was snowing. I was overheating. It was snowing. It was snow

Pouring snow he was eating too much. I had to go back in the Bears elements get in here and mini hibernation It was a great intro to you though. I was like, I know exactly who he is now I get he leaves the party to sit in the snow. I get it. You had to regroup man That's how that's how it's Kelsey's regroup. Just take a step outside and just fall asleep. I do love that Dude, I'm sorry. We had to call you out with Dave, Dave on the other week. I don't know if you caught that. Well, I got tagged. We had some fun with it, but I mean it worked.

Yeah, I got tagged through it. Dave, you had my old boy on the show. He did a good job, I listened. I listened, and also him being a Philly guy, I know he was amped to come see you guys and kiss the ring a little bit. He was pumped. It was so cool having him on here.

I really enjoyed that. One of the best conversations we've had. I have a bunch about him, some I can't even share, but off camera. That's the best. Yeah. Those are the best. Well, before we get going,

we talked about this on last week's show. Jason wants to know about the meaning of your nickname, Cheeto. So it originated, people call me Cheeto Santino. Cheeto, I hear more often than anything now. I'm bad with timelines, but I think like 15 or 16 years ago, I moved to LA in 06, at the end of 06, and then I was playing basketball.

I would play like these pickup games. We'd go to like these elementary schools, which always is great on the weekends, or go to like these local spots in Culver City that were pretty nasty at the time. It was great, great pickup ball. But I played with a bunch of guys, a couple of guys from the East side,

some Mexican dudes from East LA. Boyle Heights, shout out Boyle Heights. Shout out Boyle. Boyle Heights. One day, this kid Pavi was looking down at my legs when we were done, and I had short shorts on, like way above the knee, old school, you know what I mean? Oh yeah.

Old school gym teacher style, yeah. In my bird era, yeah, in my bird era. Well, you gotta be able to move. I wanna pivot quick, you know? And he looked down and he's like, damn dog, I never really seen your legs up close. And I was like, what do you mean? He's like, it looks like you ate a bag of Cheetos

and then you rub Cheeto dust like all over your legs from your fingers, like, they look like Cheetos, dog, like for real, and everybody was losing it. And then, like at first I was annoyed and embarrassed. And then I, when I looked down, I was like, yeah, that is, they do look like Cheetos. They do look like Cheetos. So Cheeto went born from that.

And then it just, I embraced it and then it stuck. Then it just kinda traveled with me and I liked it. Then I turned my social into all that, and then, but it never left, it was funny. At first I was annoyed, and then I thought, nah, you gotta walk, if you don't walk into this, it's worse. Oh, this, you already know I'm on board with that. If you don't walk into it,

they're gonna cook you even harder. It's gonna get you way worse. Yeah, absolutely. That's playground mentality 101. Yeah,, absolutely. That's playground mentality 101. Yeah, embrace it. That's playground mentality 101. And I just love that both you and Travis got your nicknames from playing pick-up ball.

Yeah, pick-up ball, baby. Mine was the big yeti. That's how Travis got the big yeti. He ran from it for a little bit. Shirt to skin. He's embraced it now. You can't run away from that too. No way.

Embrace it. Dude, it's just a fucking sweater vest. It's just a jersey. That's right. It's just a jersey and I gotta own it. Have a, has a- Trav, we said skins. Exactly, sorry, I'll make sure I shave next time.

Speaking of sweater vests, Trav's the only guy that I know that'll play golf when it's like 94 in a multi-layered shirt with a vest. Dude, it's insane. You are the only dude I know that can do that. And he wasn't sweating at all. I was drenched. Oh, underneath.

Underneath I was. Sticky? Yeah. It was a little sticky? It was real hot. I don't know how you do that. You just had to be like multiple days of like drinking Bender, so you're just so dehydrated

that there's no sweat to come out of the pores. Yeah, nothing can come out. That is true. And that was definitely. Yep, definitely where we were at Every time a little liver pain a little bit of liver pain Prize picks that's right. You heard it America It's the number one fantasy sports app in the land and it's the most exciting way to play daily fantasy sports Get in on the NBA playoff action and win up to 100X your money on prize picks as you and the world's best players

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personal experience to be read by talent outside of Travis and Jason Gelsie. Because we cannot participate. Well I guess I could but I'm choosing not to. But you know who can? Inter Brandon, Inter Brandon, come on now. Hey Nick boy. Been here the whole time.

Now I have your prize picks. His prize picks must be going well, cause look at those biceps. Okay. I'll give some picks for tonight. Paolo Banchero points. I'm gonna go more. I'm gonna take Jokic points, more. And I'm gonna do LeBron James points, more.

I'm gonna get out of here. Travis, you can come back. Well, hopefully Brandon did good. And if you wanna start making your own picks, download the app today and use the code, you guessed it, NEWHEIGHTS for a first deposit match up to $100. Again, download the app today and use code NEWHEIGHTS for a first deposit match up to $100. Pick more, pick less. It's that easy. Like I said last week, Jason, I love Tommy John underwear. It's so soft and comfortable and so light. I can't even feel them on right now

Jason it's obvious. I love this underwear, but you said you You were going to give them a go last week and I gotta ask have you tried it yet Have you tried Tommy John yet? I tried them out. I did give us a nice review I tried them out at the Chris long golf. Oh What I really like about them is that it's standard spandex on the legs. Good for no chafing. The rear end, I don't know if you can see this, but it's mesh. So very breathable in the rear end and frontal area. It's tight on the package, which if it's tight on me, it's gonna be tight on nearly everybody.

And I brought this, so I have a buffalo testicle scrotum sack that somebody sent me. So I thought I'd show you just how tight it is. Yeah, there's just not any bulge. It's just, you need it to be able to rest into it. You know what I mean? Yeah. Well, I'm just saying, outside of that, it was fantastic. Did you chafe?

No, zero chafing. Just a little snug? Just a little snug on that region, but outside of that, good. And also, they packed in some sleep shorts. Love the sleep shorts, very good. All right, sounds like you're starting to realize Tommy John has changed the game.

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Nice, so am I. It's really the Cadillac of chairs, isn't it? It sure is, but I've been wondering something this whole time. If the chair was meant for my retirement, how did you get one? I don't know, our friends over at Lazy Boy offered me one, so I said, you know what, how can I turn that down?

I was the one that came up with the idea. You know who else they're giving them away to? Two people who enter the new Heights lazy boy giveaway. No way How about that here that night at Jupiter centers? You have a chance to win a custom-made lazy boy recliner as we said before you don't need to be an athlete to enjoy Some well-deserved recline time all you have to do to enter is follow Lazy Boy on Instagram. Like and comment on a Lazy Boy post promoting this giveaway and then BAM you're in. That's right enter the New Heights Lazy Boy giveaway now through May 1st. And while you're at it check out LazyBoy.com or stop into a local Lazy Boy retailer

to test one of these bad boys out and all their other great furniture too. We've always been Lazy Boy fans, and now you will be as well. Welcome aboard. Long live the lazy. Let's get to Vegas though, man. You just wrapped up Bad Friends in Vegas? Yeah, we did our last.

Fucking awesome, man. Me and Bobby Lee were touring our podcast, Bad Friends, live show. Bobby Lee! My boy. Legend. We're done, I think we did 50. The number is off, but we've been touring for just over a year

Just a calendar year passed a couple weeks ago and Vegas was our last show 50 some odd shows it was been an incredible run man. It was what it was just it was insane We had a proposal we had a proposal on stage. Hell. Yeah, yeah guy purple I mean that was actually our fourth proposal of the tour But this guy proposed to you he proposed to his mean, that was actually our fourth proposal of the tour, but this- A guy proposed to you? He proposed to his wife, but- Oh, all right. I would have taken it.

Well, his soon-to-be wife. I was thinking that Bobby was gonna propose to you. That's what- Bobby would propose to me, but I don't know if I could be married to him. I don't, I just don't know. I could hook up. He'd be a fun hookup, you know, in Fuck, Marry, Kill.

He would be just fuck, not marry, sometimes kill. Yeah. No, but we finished a long tour. Probably Fuck, then Kill. Yeah, Fuck, then Kill. But you know, if it's Bobby on the show, he'd be like, Kill that fuck.

Yeah, that's what he would say, he's a lunatic. Yeah, the tour was incredible, man. It was so fun. It was like, you know, not to be corny, but seeing the fans, connecting with the fans on that level, it brings you a new level of appreciation. I know you guys feel it in sports. It's just so wild, these live events.

There's something that happens when you get to see their faces and feel their energy. It's, I don't know, it's unbelievable. And for people to tell you things like, dude, you make my work commute so much easier. Or dude, I'm going through a divorce. Or dude, I'm going through a breakup. Or something tragic happened, I lost my mom.

And when they tell you that, you're the thing that gives them a little bit of peace during the week and happiness. It really truly does do something to you. I don't know what it is, but you're like, man, it's totally worth it to change people's shitty day. It's, I mean, it's awesome. It's great.

It's one, I mean, you know. I love to hear that, man. I'm glad you're in it for the right reasons too, because that's how you know you do this shit for the right reasons, man. Yeah, I wanna make, my only goal when I was a kid was like, I wanted to be a professional comedic personality. I wanted to be an actor in a standup,

and I didn't know if either of them would even work. And all I wanted to do was make people laugh. I wanted to make people laugh and feel good, because the world is dark and weird. And I was like, how can I break this up and get, make a living having fun and making people kind of forget about all the, you know, nonsense of the world? And we did it.

Look at us. Look at us. We did it, baby. Our body boys. We're here. We're the world. And we did it. Look at us. Look at us. We did it, baby. How about it, boy? We're here. We're doing it.

We're doing it. What did, did you have anybody looking up to, or that you were young that you looked up to, like what were the comedic people that you thought, like, man, that guy's, I mean, when I was a kid, that guy's where I wanna be. It's a, you know, my first answer is so like,

I mean, Eddie Murphy was like, I don't, I mean, you know, everyone will say that most likely in my generation. You know, I'm 40. Yeah, the 90s Eddie Murphy. Yeah, it was just, he was unbelievable. He was everything to me. And Jim Carrey, I would say, was like from the acting side was my guy, you know, like that I wanted to emulate

or be like, even though he was a standup, but I, as a kid, I only knew him as an actor. I was too young to know him as a standup, but Eddie was that guy to me that was like so wild and free and yeah, I wanted to have that energy. I knew I could never be that, but I was like, whatever that is, I love that. Cause he's having, he always looked like he was having fun.

Which that turned me on the most. That standups that looked like they were also having fun was like kind of what I wanted. Like they were in with you on it, you know? Hell yeah. And that's kind of what turned me on the most. But yeah, him and Jim Carrey I think were the two dudes that I was like, God, I want to be that so bad.

I want to be that kind of, have that energy with people and have that influence in comedy. You definitely do, brother. You definitely do. Thank you, bro, I'm trying. I remember the first time I saw you live, and it was in Kansas City at the Ample Theater. That's right.

And it was when you were on tour with Rogan, right? With Rogan, yeah. Paul, that's me calling you probably. Hello? Travis Chan P, how about that? Are you kidding me? Is it? We should pick it up, Rufus.

Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up. Hey Chandler. I'm sitting here on the podcast with Cheeto Santino right now. Oh, you're with that little stick of big red gum? Hi! What's up, CP? Spicy, so spicy. You already know.

We were just about to get into how you won the tournament this weekend. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, let's talk about it. I'm talking about how many strokes I got, whatever else. You did, you did get too many strokes. You got like nine. No, I got five, I got five.

Five aside. You went in with, what'd you go in with? I played as a fucking 12, it's not my fault. Santino thinks he's a scratch, gives me five aside. All right. You should see this guy swing, it a side. Ha ha ha ha ha. You should see this guy swing, it's unbelievable. Oh, it's magical. It's as if there's a hinge point at all parts of his body

and it's snapping into place as he goes back. It's like doing the robot as he's swinging the globe. Not only did I get the championship, Santino, I got most approved player too, so eat dicks. Ha ha ha ha ha. All right, love you, buddy. I'm gonna hit you as soon as I get out of here. Yep. One of the greatest.

Chan P. Fuck yeah, damn I forgot what we were talking about. Oh, me and when I was opening for Rogan and KC. Ah dude. Yeah. But I can attest for you being able to give that energy and that feeling. I had my homes join me.

This was like a training camp getaway. It was like a one day just happened to be on the off day of training camp out in KC. And me and Mahomes were like, let's fucking go and do it. We got front row seats to see you just absolutely rip it. It was so fun. It was so fucking fun. You did the one waffle joke.

Oh my God, I still fucking love that joke. Well, it's wild cause Rogan, Joe, I was at the time I was touring, it's wild, it's because Rogan, you know, like Joe, I was at the time, I was touring, that's five years ago, or how many years ago, it's gotta be. At least. At least, maybe six or seven. Yeah, and I was touring with Rogan, and Joe loves MMA, you know,

he loves everything in the martial art world, but you know, traditional sports, not, he's cool with, but it's not like his thing. So I was amped, I was like, dude, the Kansas City Chiefs are like, coming to see us. Like we're gonna, I linked up with these, but it's not like his thing. So I was amped. I was like, dude, the Kansas City Chiefs are like coming to see us. Like we're gonna, I linked up with these guys. They're coming to see us.

And he was like, oh cool, which team are they? I was like, the football team. And he was like, all right, word, cool. I mean, like didn't, it just doesn't mean anything to him. I was amped, cause like, they're coming to see us. Dude, the boy, we're in their time, we're in their city. This is perfect timing. And then after that, I was in Dallas,

and Pat came out with the crew. With the crew, yeah. With the crew to come see me in Dallas, and then after that, you know, tour's been going on, and life has changed for the better. It's been amazing, man. Dude, I remember that show forever, man. You absolutely killed it.

It was so fun. It was so fucking good. That amphitheater's beautiful in KC. You had everybody fucking fired up. And shout out to Philly, we love Philly. I said that before the show, but every time I play Philly, we get so much love. We were in The Met last year. Beautiful, beautiful theater, man.

It was unbelievable, yeah. Yeah, man. Sometimes I'm shocked that they let us into those theaters. I'm like, we're telling dick jokes inside of like an ornately designed beautiful theater. I'm like, this is so inappropriate for how gorgeous this thing is.

It was constructed with such care. You know what I mean? Like some dude carving the ceiling. beautiful theater. I'm like, this is so inappropriate for how gorgeous this thing is. It was constructed with such care. You know what I mean? Like some dude carving the ceiling. He's like, one day a ginger man will tell a disgusting penis joke in this very room. So it's ridiculous. And it will erupt.

Yeah. And the laughs will sound so lovely. And they will bounce off these beautiful walls. They will project perfectly. Right to this specific point. Yeah, it's been amazing. And now I'm touring around doing, getting ready for my hour.

I'm gonna shoot another hour in a bit, but I'm getting the hour honed in and all that. So I'm touring again. That's awesome, man. I cannot fucking wait just yet. Your last, dude, the last cheeseburger was a fucking banger. Thank you, yeah. Cheeseburger on Netflix, that was That's awesome, man. I cannot fucking wait just yet. Excited. Dude, the last cheeseburger was a fucking banger. Thank you, yeah. Cheeseburger on Netflix, that was so much fun, man.

That was like, what a fun thing to do. I shot that in Denver, and that's the same thing. We like coin up an hour over a couple years and you peel it apart. And some guys, you know, like some guys back in the day would do two or three years. Then for like Chappelle and Louis, it was like every year. And now people are back to a couple years

to kind of like pace it out, I think. For a minute, those guys were like competing over like who could do it, who could do it, who could do it. And then the younger guys, we were like, well, I'll chill out a little bit, I'm good. I need to break myself, you know? I love how you brought a full circle with the cheeseburger though.

Oh yeah, yeah. You just wanna be enjoyed, man. I just wanna be enjoyed. I named that the cheeseburger because I just, it was a real conversation I had with my wife about having a tough time mentally, which we all go through. I was like, I just wanna be a cheeseburger. I just want people to enjoy me right now

while they have me. I don't need some great stamp by the world. I just want you to like have fun right now, because life should be to me living right now. It's tough to live for any other time. So that's what that whole thing was about. You know, it's like just have fun right now. You have no idea when it's gonna go or you know,

how you go. So you can't be looking so far in the future. The whole thing was when you eat a cheeseburger, you're just enjoying it now. You're not thinking about anything other than that. Yeah, so I don't want the trophies or the statues, especially if the statue looks like Alan Ivers' statue. Dude, the statues could go one way or the other, man.

Some of them are so good. Some of them you're like, all right, all right, they love you, they love you. I mean, like if they made a statue of you guys, I mean, don't you want pre-approval, doesn't that? Don't you wanna go, can I take a look at the drawings? It's like getting a tattoo without them putting the stencil on them.

I'm always like, freehand? Are we freehand the statue? Are you gonna freehand the statue? I think we should lay it out first. We don't have a machine that can make this, like weights. We can 3D print. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, like Jordan's statue, when they put that up outside the United Center, I remember that was like mixed reviews, because I'm from Chicago and that was like, some people loved it, some people didn't like it, but they're never gonna look that much like you. Do you know what I mean? Like, it'll be close, but it can't be,

so don't expect anything. Yeah. Yeah. So Jason, don't expect your statue to look anything like you out there. Yeah. No, if they ever do, I hope it looks anything. Yeah. So Jason, don't expect your statue to look anything like you out there. Yeah. No, if they ever do, I hope it looks much better looking. But shout out to Allen Iverson. He's the man.

But it was a strange statue. Let's be real. It was like a mini me version. It was a little wild. You were just about to talk about you're building out a new special. You're getting ready to do another hour, right? What's that process like? How long are these jokes, I mean, being tested out before you've figured out what that run of show looks like?

Yeah, so it's, you know, everyone has a different process. There is no, there is no like, we all do this, but- Uniform. Not at all. Some guys, you know, I'm doing a club run, you know, and then I'm gonna go play theaters when it's really cooked. But right now I'm doing clubs to do four shows, two Fridays, two Saturdays.

Sometimes I'll do six, depending on the city. Like Dallas, I sold out six quickly because Dallas is great for, I mean, that city I always do well in and I like the club a lot, so I was like, I'll just do that. But I like to just peel it out and it'll, it takes me, you know, this, this'll have been almost a year. And I'm, I have the hour that I think I want to present

and then I'll go to the club and kind of start to puzzle piece it together in terms of like, this should go here, I want this here. And then slowly stack it, listen to my setback, write it down, you know, and go back and forth and then change it the next night. And the next night, maybe go back to the first one and see how it, how my timing works

and see how it pairs up. Dude, this is so fascinating. Yeah, it's weird. And there's no one way, truly. Like I have friends that do it, that, you know, like Shane Gillis is a good homie and like he's doing it on tour now. Beautiful dogs.

Because he just, yeah, Beautiful Dogs, such a good special. And he's doing it on tour now. Beautiful dogs. Because he just, yeah, beautiful dogs, such a good special and he's doing it now on his new tour in theaters, peeling in the new stuff that he's got and then also doing a set that he already knows he has. So everyone has a different process, but for me I'm just gonna do a club run and then I'm gonna do theaters probably in the fall

to get ready, ready to record. Maybe I think December or January I'll record it. You think you'll go back to the hometown? I don't know where I'm gonna record this one, man. That's so funny. They asked me, I'm actually doing it with, I feel like I can say this, I'm doing it with Omaha Productions with-

Oh, nice! With Manning, yeah. Oh, it's over in Omaha. Yeah, yeah, the big dog. So we have a meeting coming up about where we wanna shoot it and I'm still lost in the sauce. I don't know. I just can't, I haven't pinpoint about where we wanna shoot it and I'm still lost in the sauce. I don't know. I just can't, I haven't pinpointed where I wanna do it,

but I do think it's gonna be in the Midwest. I will say that. I'm almost positive it's gonna be in the Midwest. Yeah. Midwest guys, keep it home. Yeah, baby, keep it back home. Do you think, back to that process, do you enjoy working the clubs,

trying new material in that like smaller intimate vibe more or do you like the big produced big show stadium vibe? Big shows are good when you have the thing to give them. It's almost like, I don't know if you're like, you know when the kids put on like a show during the holidays for the adults, when the kids are like, all right, you guys wanna watch us perform the thing?

It's like, that's what it feels like when we go do theaters that you're like, I wanna show them, I wanna show mom and dad the thing now. We were in the cousin's room, we were preparing the speech and the song and the thing. That's what it feels like. And the clubs feel like to warm up. I mean, it's still, it's not like that's less of a show.

It's just way more intimate and loose and kind of, you know, it's kind of more fun. It's kind of like when you're drunk making a meal, when you're like, ah, we'll see if this works. We'll see if this works. How does that taste? And then, you know, and then the theaters are more like a sit down dinner where you're like, this is prepared.

It's tight. It's more concise, you know, for me, again, but that's everyone's so different, but that's how I'd like to do it. Oh yeah. Do you, you talked about doing the tour this past set of shows, you guys talked about going on a bus. Oh my God.

Did you guys end up doing the tour bus? Yeah, we did the tour bus. We did it for the first half and then that was it. I gotta tell you, that was it. They were like, do you want the bus for the second half? I was like, no, I think we're gonna fly. I think we're gonna fly. We know there's no,

everyone knows the rule of tour buses. There's no pooping on the bus. That is a fact. It's been that way since the 70s. Who abused that? Bobby, Bobby Lee. Bobby Lee clearly was the first one to poop on the bus. I wish Vegas had a money line on it.

I would have bet so big. He hammered that line. I mean, but the bus driver, we had this dude, he was so funny, man. He was so wild. And he's like, I'm just gonna be real with you. If y'all poop on the bus, y'all are gonna be smelling it for a long time.

And I was like, well, let's not poop on the bus, please. Of course, Bobby pooped on the bus without a doubt. He's like, we couldn't stop, it was two in the morning. He wasn't gonna pull over, blah, blah, all these excuses. Which I know wasn't true. I know he pooped in the afternoon and he just lied to me. Yeah. It was 2 p.m., not 2 a.m.

He was just switching his head. But the bus life is crazy because you live in these coffins, which actually are more comfortable than you think. They call them these coffins. They're like bunks. Yeah, they're not that bad. You feel kinda like snuggled, like burritoed in a little bit.

Interesting. I slept in the back for a bunch of it. There was like a bedroom back there, but small, and I hated it. The bunks are a little bit nicer because there's a dump bunk where you put all your stuff in and then you sleep in those little, they're little comfort, you know,

little like tiny comforting sleeping bags on them. Just little nooks. Little nooks. And then you can put your iPad up, they've got these clips so you can put your iPad on the ceiling and watch TV shows and movies. Yeah, it's actually kind of nice.

They have little speakers and fans and it's kind of cool. It's kind of a little getaway. But the worst part is doing a show, doing the meet and greets and all that stuff, you gotta eat fast, pack up, then get on the bus immediately because you have to drive to the next city. So you're sleeping through the night

and then you're waking up in Oklahoma, then you're waking up in KC, then you're waking up in Indianapolis. So that's a little tough on your body clock, it stinks. You gotta wake up, I would try to get a workout in, then go to lunch, write and organize, do sound check, and then you're at the venue. So there's not a ton of like kick at time.

It's kinda tough. It's a little tough for you. That's why the planes are so much easier. It's more expensive to jump the whole crew on a plane and go, go, go, but it's worth it, man, because the buses are, they're tough. They're tough, it's tough, dude. I can only imagine. Especially on Inters, when you're going

through the middle of the country, and this is you all night long on the bus, all night, dude. I mean, it's like being out at sea. I mean, like all night you're like this, because the buses are so top heavy, any bit of wind, they shake the whole night. And if the road is a little bumpy, no bueno, it's not good. It's not good. They're hard to pee in the middle of whole night. And if the road is a little bumpy, no bueno, it's not good.

It's not good. They're hard to pee in the middle of the night. You're holding onto the wall. Yeah, it's going everywhere, dude. Before we get out of Vegas, we gotta give 8 a.m. golf a shout. They always have the funnest tournament. I was pissed I couldn't make it this year, but.

We were mad you didn't come back. The returning champions didn't return, which is a little strange. Well, yeah, Pat didn't do the past two years. I at least came back last year and tried to run it up with Chan P. Fell short to Timberlake and Fallon. For all of you that don't know,

8 a.m. golf is Timberlake's big deal that he has out in Vegas every single year. At the Wynn Golf Club. And man, is it a fucking good time. It was so fun, man. Looking at all the videos from over the weekend, I knew I missed a good one. Yeah, Jimmy went off.

He threw a drone in the water, which, it started, he threw one of the flags. I think he threw the flag in the 17th green in the water. Dude, he's, you know. And then he threw the drone in the water. You know that's my lake, Lake Travis. That's Lake Travis, yeah, I know. Dude, that's where he threw my putter.

He's got a fucking, god damn it, Jimmy control yourself. He can't dude, he was out of control. But he was, they were having, we played them the second round. It was me and C-League, me and Courtney Lee played. C-League? In the second half we played them. And we did great, it was just, I was giving Chandler shit

because him and Blake Griffin got like 30 strokes. I was like, how can I beat the guys who stroke on every hole? But it was so much fun, man. We had a blast. Yeah, and it keeps getting better. There's more and more just good people that come every single year.

It was stacked. It was stacked with like so many fun, cool, and good golfers. Like surprisingly more people that were good than I knew how good they were until they showed up and I was like. Phelps is always out there. We played him and Brian,

and I can't remember his last name from the office. Why can't I remember his last name? I always forget it too. It's not Baumgartner, right? Yeah, that's right. Yeah. I think I still owe him from. Oh, you don't owe him anything.

Tahoe. He went off gambling by the way. He went, dude that guy goes off. I see him on Tahoe always ripping it up. Yeah, he's like, do you want to come play with us? And I was like, I'm going to go to the $50 tables. I don't think my residuals are as good as yours, buddy. So I went over the little baby tables,

but they were going, I mean, they were gambling, gambling. And then we played them in the second round and on 18, there was a couple of like fans or sponsors or whatever behind us. And the guy was like, how are you guys doing? I said, good. And he goes, do you know, do you know, do you know him? And I go, yeah, he's a swimmer, I think.

That guy's a swimmer of all Phelps. He goes, no, I know that. I go, yeah, I think he was like in the Olympics. I don't know what, I think he's an Olympic guy. I think he's an Olympic guy. And the guy got annoyed. He was like, no, I know that. I'm saying, did you guys know each other before?

Are you American? I said, yeah, I think he's got a bunch of the neck danglies that they give you. The lanyards. Yeah, the lanyards. Yeah, a couple of lanyards to take home. Yeah, so it was fun. Overall, man, it was so much fun.

We had, it was a great time and a good group of people. And I'm taking a break from drinking for a little while because ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. That'll be me next week, next week. 15 of my homies, Pat Mahomes has his golf foundation. Which I'm missing for the first time in four years. I'm not happy. Over at Shadow, man.

Haven't played Shadow in a long time, so I'm pumped about that. Oh, you're gonna kill it. And I'm pumped to see my dog. All right, well, I at least have to give a shout out to 8AM for always having a blast. Sorry I couldn't make it this year, guys. The best.

Let's get to Ricky Stinnicky, dude. Let's go! Are you kidding me? I was talking to you when you were filming this out in Australia, right? Down under. Down under night. You're out there playing on the links out there.

I was hitting the sticks. Available now on Amazon Prime. Make sure you guys check it out. Please. You start alongside Zach Efron, Jermaine Fowler, and John Cena. John Cena! John Cena!

Yeah, he was great, man. Cena is the best. We had so much fun down there. We shot in Melbourne, or Mel-born, as Americans say it. And Cena, Efron, William H. Macy, and my boy Jermaine was playing, you know, me and Jermaine Fowler, Efron, William H. Macy, and my boy Jermaine was played, me and Jermaine Fowler and Efron played three best friends who make up an imaginary friend as their alibi

for all the trouble that they get into as kids. And then our wives and girlfriends are like, I wanna meet this dude, so we have to hire a lunatic to play our best friend. And that's John Cena. John Cena! So fun, man. Oh my God.

It was one of the most fun times I've ever had and shooting it in Australia was wild. I went out with Cena and we had, John likes Guinness and I'm a whiskey and tequila, you know I'm a big whiskey guy and I like, I'm not really a huge, not a huge beer guy. I'll have one with you but he loves Guinness and so. Biggest guy in the room loves the most protein. 100% you gotta keep it, I gotta keep it. It's chicken and Guinness my guy. He's stealingness and so. Biggest guy in the room loves the most protein in his drinks. 100%, you gotta keep it.

I gotta keep it between, it's chicken and Guinness, my guy. He's stealing protein right now. So he would say there would be nights where he'd be, he'd shoot me a text and be like, do you wanna go have a Guinness? I think I've got a later start. And a later start for John would be like 9.30 a.m. You know what I mean?

Like he was so, he's so on top of it, it's unbelievable. Like professionalism through the roof with that guy. I keep hearing about this. Through the roof, dude. It's so cool to hear. He's early prepped, beyond prepared, like bright-eyed, bushy-tailed. He's one of those guys.

He's ready to go at all times. There is no excuses with him, not like- That's a talent, man. Yeah, it's a skill for sure. And then he'd call me and be like, hey, I have a late one in tomorrow. Do you wanna go have a Guinness or two? But with him, it's like, I'm 6'1", 200 pounds.

I'm not a tiny guy, but one or two is the first five minutes. Do you know what I mean? Like, every one Guinness I had, he'd have three. So I think we went out and ate kangaroo and had Guinness at a bar. Ate kangaroo? Yeah, we had kangaroo. I had kangaroo.

What are you eating on the kangaroo? What did that taste like? Like the tail or the thigh? What are you eating on that? Yeah, I think he's eating the chin down here. Just down under. I don't know what it- I think we're eating kangaroo backstrappers. I have no idea what part. I didn't even ask.

I didn't ask. No. What did it taste like? Time out. It's got to be gamey. What was the most similar taste? It's gamey. Of regular animals.

It's gamey. Like, you know how deer is- like how deer- But if you marinate it long enough, it's not, I liked it. I don't know, like John didn't like it. I finished my steak salad. I mean, also I was on five Guinnesses, so who knows? Who knows if it was the hunger

or if it was that the beautiful Irish beer. But at first I was like, do you eat this down here? And then I was like, kangaroo, someone has to look this up. They outnumber humans in Australia, it's like five to one. Oh wow. Like I thought there can't be that many. Is this an endangered thing?

They were like, nah, mate, they're everywhere. They have too many kangaroo. Like they can't wait for you to eat them. And so, yeah, they don't care. So we ate them and had Guinness and it was, John hated it. I loved it. I thought it was so delicious. I they don't care. So we ate them and had Guinness and it was, John hated it, I loved it. I thought it was so delicious, I would eat it again. But he's a good dude to go out and have one with

and then again, in the morning, a pro. Like doesn't miss a beat, a total pro. So dope. Yeah, me on the other hand, I was, it was some tough mornings. It's getting rude, it's killing me right now. Yeah, it was tough. It was tough, but we had so much fun

and they were really, really good people and good to, they treated us well. That whole city showed us so much love in Melbourne. There's something about the Hossies, man. They're the best, dude. They are such cool people. Every single time, I fucking see one. I ran into Hemsworth one night

and it was like I met my long lost brother. Within like two minutes, I'm like, dude, we gotta rip it again. We don't have enough time right now, but we gotta do this again. They're so chill and so down. I don't know, it is a great vibe down there. And then we went to Tasmania,

which I couldn't recommend more. I thought that was like one of the coolest things. We went to this place called the Mona, M-O-N-A, the Museum of Old and New Art. Oh, cool. And this dude, the story's crazy. This dude was like a billionaire gambler who was like banned from gambling

because he like cracked the code. He was like Rain Man. And then he took all this money and he bought this huge, beautiful house. You'd have to look this up. And it's multiple floors. It's gotta be three to five floors underground. Everything from like Picasso's to like brand new art.

And during the day, there's five or six like nooks of musicians, artists, painters, performers working on their craft and then they perform in the evening. So they- So cool. They're doing it during the day and then you get to see it in the afternoon. And it was one of the coolest things I've ever seen in my life. Like we watched a harpist write a new song and then she was performing at 4.30 that night. That's cool.

So you watch them work it out and then you get to chill, go have lunch, come back. Yeah, it would do that. We had so much fun down there. I can't wait to go back. Awesome. Whenever I hear a harp going off, it just feels like I start to like get left it

and just start floating. Yeah. Oh wow. That is what I wanted. People say you see the lights when you pass away. I I start to like get lifted. Float. And just start floating. Yeah. Oh wow. That is what I wanted. People say you see the lights when you pass away. I just want to hear a harp, then I'll be like, all right, it's time. Hit the harp.

Hit the harp. Take me to the other place. So good, man. Shout out to Australia for making it home for you guys. Showing me a lot of love. And let's move on to some no dumb questions. All right, now it's time to get to our segment, no dumb questions, because there's no such thing as dumb people. True, to some no dumb questions. All right, now it's time to get to our segment no dumb questions,

because there's no such thing as dumb people. True, true. Just dumb questions. Wait, I had that backwards. There's no such, we'll just keep it going. Well, there is no such thing as dumb people. There's definitely dumb people. Just no dumb questions.

That's right. Until you hear some of these. No dumb questions is sponsored by Tommy John underwear. You ever throw on some Tommy Johns? Yeah, I mean, I usually free ball, but I'm gonna start wearing Tommy Johns from now on. We got something about the Midwest crew right here. Yeah, let it fly.

I don't, but you guys do. Tommy John makes the most comfortable underwear on the planet. No adjustment needed. No, sometimes you gotta No shifting. Yeah, no shifting. No shifting.

All right, here, let's get to our first no-dumb question from Michelle Kintz with a Z on Instagram. Did Trav really forget his undergarments four years ago when he came on your podcast? Let me tell you something. I got a call, Travis came on Whiskey Ginger when I used to shoot it out of my house before we were moving studios.

Yeah, and he came to the house, we set up at the crib because we were moving, and so it was kind of a tight squeeze and the cameras and the angles, all this stuff. And my editor calls me and he's like, "'Bro, I don't know how to tell you this, "'but Travis was falling out of his shorts.'" I was like, what are you saying, dude?

Like, why are you being so, I was like, "'What do you mean, falling out of his shorts?' He's like, his boys were sliding out, and I was like, oh no, and he goes, do you wanna call him and reshoot it? And I said, just put a Kansas City Chiefs logo over, over his pakao whenever it falls out. I mean, Travis's, his boys wanted to make an appearance

on Whiskey Ginger, and I get that, but sometimes they'd slide out, sometimes they'd go back in the cave. So I said, dude, just throw a logo over it, it'll be really funny. And- Hey, what's that commotion? Yeah.

What's going on out there? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. You guys laughing at? Yeah, Travis had a couple of fallout, couple of fallout boys. Uh, and we cut it out. And by the way, that footage will be available. What's her name?

Mackenzie or whatever? Yeah, Mackenzie, Michelle. Michelle, Michelle, that footage will be available on our Patreon. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. We're gonna hold off and sell that footage for a lot of money someday, Michelle. That one is in the vault for life.

Yeah, Travis had a little sideshow going on. I didn't have my Tommy Johns on. No, he did not. No wonder you wear underwear now. I've never had that issue. Mine can't fall anywhere. They're adhered. Well, you tape it to your leg.

Yeah. Keep it tight. Sorry, yeah. All right, well, it was a fun ass interview. You guys should check it out. So fun. On Whiskey Ginger's page. Our sponsor, Tommy John, heard about this

and has given us a care package just for you. Oh hey, how about that? Whoa. Santino, it's under my seat. Under your seat? How about this? I didn't know we gave out. Oh look at that. Oh wow. Thank you dude. I know you do free ball and everything but I mean you got friends and cousins and shit. Amazing. The gold standard of underwear. There you go. Oh nice. Emergency box. I won't have to shift ever again. Look at that packaging.

Dude. These are great man. Thank you so much. Thanks TJ. Hopefully they're in your side. Yeah, I mean. Size. Yeah, they might be my size.

We'll find out. You know me, if it's free give me three. I imagine I'm a little smaller than you. Underwear size wise, just because of, yeah, that's it. There's no shifting. Yeah, there's it. There's no shifting. Yeah, there's no shifting, no more shifting. Automatic underwear. Yeah, so thanks Tommy John for passing those along.

Thanks TJ. We didn't know you didn't wear underwear. Yeah, no, I do now, I will now. Honestly, it depends on the season. When it starts to get warmer, it depends on the pants I'm wearing. It's all, like when I golf, I'll be wearing my Tommy Johns. There you go.

Yeah, you gotta, I have to. There you go. Yeah, exactly. But when I'm around the house, or when I'm at work, or when I'm with friends and family, when I'm at a funeral, a wedding, free ball! But I'll be wearing my TJs when I play sports. God, let the boys fly.

All right, let's move on to our next one from at Emily E. Suelle on Instagram. Not for Andrew, but my husband and I constantly argue about this is Travis A. Ginger. No, you're not. You are, but you are accepted by the community. We had a meeting. Honorary? Yeah, we had a meeting in what? February this year. And we voted on you, and you did slide in. You are a brother, you're a part of the brotherhood. That's what I'm talking about.

But you are your own animal. You're not one of us, but we do love you and accept you very much. And Jason, you did get an honorary mention as well, because we do know you'll have specks of red come in your beard a little bit. The rumor is you pluck them, which we're not happy about. You have to let them stay.

You gotta let them stay, dude. Yeah. That's so good. But you do get a little bit of a red beard. In the summertime, your beard gets a little red. Yeah, if it gets real long and then the sun hits it. Yeah, I know. Fries that thing real nice.

You look like me if God wasn't messing around with colors. You know what I mean? If he was like, all right, we'll stop playing. You look like me if God wasn't messing around with colors. You know what I mean? If he was like, all right, we'll stop playing. We'll make a good looking version of it. I was the beta version of it. Yeah. He's like, look at how funny this looks. All right, we'll make a good one.

We'll make a good one. Look at his legs, look at his legs. We'll make a good one, we'll make a good one. But you're accepted by the brotherhood. Accepted by the Ginger Crew. Thank you, thank you. Gosh, I'm so fucking honored. I know man, it's a big deal.

I'm thinking of the community that I'm a part of right now. Is Scalabrine? Scal is absolutely, that's one of our kings. The white mamba. Yeah, he is actually one of the leaders of the conference. Yeah, he's up top. Him, Ron Howard, although he's lost most of it, but we still recognize him.

Oh yeah. Kathy Griffin, Carrot Top. Ooh, Carrot Top, Swole is a son of a bitch. Yeah, well he's our security, Carrot Top works security. That's all about the Super Bowl. Back to your Chicago roots, what about Rodman? Yeah, Rodman, he's definitely in when he wants to be. And we just can't argue with him, yeah.

We're not allowed to say anything about that. I don't want him to come beat me up. I had to ask, because obviously, one of the best comedians, Chi-Town, like Bill Murray. The best? Like when Farley and Feral at the Chicago studio. So a lot of those guys came through Second City in Chicago.

Second City, that's what it was. A lot of guys would come to Chicago and perform there or start comedy there and then go back to New York or LA or whatever, but Second City has cultivated some of the greatest comedies of all time. That place in particular, and same thing with I.O., Improv Olympic. They, Chicago became this like improv hub

and it made some of the greatest of all time. Have you ever- That's why Farley loved Chicago so much. I mean, he was a, you know, he went to school in Marquette, Wisconsin kid, and he loved Chicago, unfortunately lost him in Chicago, which stinks, but like, yeah, those,

I think a lot of those guys, Chicago feels like a smaller New York. So if you're not ready for New York as a performer, maybe, it feels a little bit more homey. It's the Midwest. And the culture was so thick and rich with comedy. And then, you know, people went on to, those guys all went on to SNL and then,

you know, the rest is history. Did you come straight West coast or did you? I never started in Chicago. I started stand up when I moved to California. I was, I mean I performed a little bit in Phoenix when I went to school at Arizona State, the Harvard of the West baby. Yeah.

And I would. Shockers baby. Yeah shock them, shock them, put them up, shock them up. So yeah, the Harvard in the desert. I went out there and I did a little bit of stand up but then when I moved to LA is when I really, so I would say I started in Los Angeles. I would never say I started, I'm not a Chicago comic.

Chicago's home, but. How long were you already in the scene out here before you got the role in I'm Dying Up Here? I was always curious about that. So I moved here in 06. That was a fucking awesome role. 06, 07, thank you. 06, 07 and that show was,

God, how long ago now? Tooth, again, my math is, I have bad math. Who knows what year it was. I'm Dying Up Here started in 20. Come on, this is where our producers thrive. Yeah, they thrive the most. Come on, guys. What does I'm Dying Up Here, what year was that in?

They offer zero. 2017 or 16, 2017? I think we might have filmed it in 2016. So 10 years. You had been grinding for quite a bit. For a decade and then I got that show and that show kind of lifted me because it was produced by Jim Carrey, Melissa Leo,

and Oscar winner was in it. So it's just kind of like Alfred Molina. How was it working with Jim fucking Carrey? The man, I mean Jim, the wildest story is Jim came to watch us at the comedy store perform. And I was, at first I thought, is this a bad idea or a good idea that he's gonna see us? Cause the store is where we like,

well, we call it working out our local club. We go to work out, that's the gym. We literally refer to it as the gym is like working out new bits and trying new stuff. And you know, you have off nights and up nights and down nights, but for the most part as a professional, you're just working out. He wanted to come see us and I was a little,

not nervous but like, I was like, is this the right venue for him to see us? Because this isn't, you know what I mean, we're doing our thing. I'm nervous right now for you. Yeah, and sure enough, he came and saw and me and Eric Griffin and Al Madrigal, who ended up being the three standups on the show,

and everybody had really, really good sets. I mean, the room was hot, things were really good, and then I think Jim wanted to go back too to feel the atmosphere. I mean, he was there. I mean, that was his club. And it was awesome. And then speaking to Jim was amazing,

kind of like learning his insight about comedy and the world and what that club meant to him and what it did to him and what Mitzi kind of did for his life and his career. That was a dream come true. If the child in me who used to sit in my mom's basement rewinding the VHS of Dumb and Dumber until it broke with my best friend, Sean,

could be like, dude, you're gonna work with this dude one. I mean, it was like mind-bending. Yeah. It was unreal. It was him and Farley, Carrie and Farley for me man. Kings, kings yeah. They were my absolute favorite.

I still have all of them on VHS actually. Yeah, oh I still got them. I just yeah, I went out and got a little 19 inch VHS TV. The TV with the VHS in it? VHS underneath. Love. And I just fucking.

By the way those things, for people that don't know, the VHS, the VHS's that were built on the TV, it might have weighed 156 pounds. It was the heaviest TV. It was so, it was a brick, dude. It was always really awkward to grab. Yeah, you couldn't hold it.

You couldn't just like pick it up, you had to like fucking get underneath it and like fucking pick it up like a boulder. Like a side thigh lift, you know what I mean? I hated that. I had one in my room at my mom's house for years and years and years. But yeah, that was a dream come true, man.

My favorite thing about those old school TVs is you would literally slap them when they weren't working. And somehow that worked. I still don't know why that fixed whenever it was happening, but I remember vividly. Just fucking smack it. Well, that was our dad. I think that was.

Hit the top of it or side of it. That was like our dads. They learned that they were like, I hit our dad, I think that was. Hit the top of it or side of it. That was like our dads. They learned that they're like, I hit the TV, I hit the kids, I hit the thing, when the thing doesn't work I hit it, it works. The kids, the coffin machine, the TV. Whenever you go into bits about your dad, I feel like we grew up in the same household.

Well Midwest dads have the same, they have the same, the exact same mannerisms. If he doesn't wanna do it, just whack him in the head. Yeah. Right. You'll figure it out. Trust me, just one good whack. All right. He gave all of my friends, dads, the thumbs up on,

if he gets out of line, you just fucking whack him. Yeah, what did he say? What did he say? Oh man, the fear that the Midwest father has put inside of him. I'd get cracked on this, the top of the head was like the crack that, and you'd like felt it through your spine, it like went into your toes.

I used to hate it so much. I knew my dad was angry when he wouldn't say anything, when he would give me like the face of like, you know what you did. Oh yeah. You know exactly what you did. It ate me alive. When he yelled, I was like, this is fine, I guess.

He's gonna be mad. But when he didn't say anything, I was like, oh man, this is not good. Yeah, no, you gotta tighten up. Yeah, that, I'm not upset with you. I'm really disappointed in you guys. Yeah. Your behavior.

When, I still remember, he had like a spell where I would like try to run away and he was like, if you run away, it's gonna get worse. Get over here right now. Like the spanking was like the ring in like Lord of the Rings and I was Dobby and I just like couldn't like get away from it. I have no idea where he just went.

I'm so fucking lost where he just went. You really, it was like a trance. But what a great trick he pulled. Because if I run away, it's not gonna be worse. You're not gonna catch me. You're not gonna catch me with those old knees. I'm outta here, bro. He knew, he knew.

Yeah, he knew, good trick. Let's do another one of these no-dumb questions. From at Aaron Reddish on Instagram, which comedian could get one yard in the NFL? Ooh, that's a good one. Which comedian could get one actual yard in the NFL, meaning as a running back? Yeah.

Yeah, I was gonna say, as a wide receiver, or as a tight end, there could be a couple of people that are pretty, but as a back would be tough. Cause who's got enough low to the ground energy to be able to do that? There's a, I would say, gotta be short and stocky. I mean, I would say. It sounds like Bob.

Bobby Lee. Bobby Lee. Well, here's why Bobby Lee would be able to get a yard in the NFL. They would hand him the ball, he would drop his pants, and everybody would run the opposite way. So he might get a first pound until somebody's ready to tackle him.

That's the only trick he might be able to pull. Psychological advantage, Bobby. Yeah, it's a psychological trick. But from a physical standpoint, literally nobody. Nobody would be, I mean, like, what are we even talking about right now? Nobody. Yeah.

Not one comic. The only guy that would be able to trick people would be Bobby with his, uh. This penis? Yeah, or he would just run backwards with his butt spread open and then just wobble backwards with the ball and no one would tackle him. Yeah. It's such a Bobby move. Yeah. He could get run backwards with his butt spread open and then just wobble backwards with the ball and no one would tackle him. Yeah.

It's such a Bobby move. Yeah. Oh man. He could get away with that. Bobby just called me by the way. He wants to know where I'm at and what I'm doing. I said I'm here. You want me to call him real fast?

Yeah, let's call Bobby. Let's call Bobby. Hi guys. Bobby, we love you. Congrats on the tour, Bobby. Hey, Bob, we said, they asked who could in the NFL, who could maybe, and comedy, who could maybe said, they asked who could in the NFL, who could maybe, and comedy, who could maybe get one yard running the football

in the NFL, and we said you, because how would you get the ball, and what would you do if you got the ball to run through the line? What do you think you'd be able to do to get a yard in the NFL? Can I put poo on my helmet? There you go, you could put poo on your helmet.

You could, good trick. We said you would get naked. We said you'd show your penis and run through the line. No, I think people would want to tackle me. People would want to tackle you, right. Then you're more desirable. That would intrigue everyone to tackle you. All right, I'll call you when I'm out of here.

Love you, Bobby. Love you, babe, bye. And the last one from at Indole on Instagram. Have you told Travis about the time you punked Taylor? I have seen this. I think he's probably seen the clip. I watch punked. Yeah.

I haven't seen this. You gotta see the clip. But we did, Justin Bieber was hosting that episode. It was a celebrity, a punking a celebrity. And we did this many, many years ago. I guess Bieber had come back from Japan and he told Taylor to come to his house to set off fireworks off the back of this house

that we rented in Malibu. My favorite part about this, by the way, when this clip resurfaced, people were like, that's so mean, this is crazy. It's like, this is fake. It's a TV show. It's not us. You know what I mean?

It's like, Jesus, relax. It's not real. But Taylor got a call from Justin and was like, come to this new recording studio. And she came down there at the beach in Malibu to just see his new studio and hang out. And he was like, I have these fireworks from Japan. Let's set them off.

And Taylor, obviously to her credit, who's always on point was like, I don't know if I wanna do that. And then so we had to put, we knew, we actually knew ahead of time as we wrote the bit, cause I wrote this bit, I was like, I was a performer on Punk'd and I also was writing the show. And I said, if she doesn't want to do it,

we have to make it so it's like a button or a thing where it's like an accidental easy, like did you do press this or whatever. And they set up a rig, a fake rig with buttons on it, and she did like touch one, like slightly, just goofing around, and it set off a fire when we had it on a rope line to throw it in the direction of this boat.

This is so good. A big boat out in the ocean. It set the boat on fire, and there was a wedding party on the boat, and I was the groom, and we were dingy to shore with our boat on fire, and we blamed hery to shore with our boat on fire and we blamed her for ruining our wedding.

And, yeah, I will say this. I love you. You could ask her the truth, but she bought it. I know she bought it because it was chaotic. I mean, the boat was on fire, but it was all professionally done. My favorite part is people on the internet were like, oh yeah, what a waste of money burning a boat.

It's like, we didn't burn a boat. It's not a real like, oh yeah, what a waste of money burning a boat. It's like, we didn't burn a boat. It's not a real rig. But yeah, she set a wedding party on fire and we came to shore with the pastor, myself, the bride, and we were like, you ruined our wedding, Taylor Swift. And then my wife, Ann Gregory, was like, maybe it's a sign. Maybe this is a sign I shouldn't marry him.

And Taylor was like, no, I don't think that's right. I don't know if that's right. It was so good. I gotta ask Taylor about that one. So fun, man. It was just like such a, it was a perfect bit that worked. Some of the bits were so wild and they didn't work, but hers was specifically, was great cause it was so many moving pieces that kinda came together.

Sometimes they don't come together like that. But like we did one with Drake, we punked Drake. He thought he was going to meet Vice President Joe Biden at the time. And we put him in the basement of the Skirball Center and we had Secret Service come like mirrors in the car and the dogs and him and his boys were in the car. And he's like, and I was a Secret Service,

I drove them, I was a Secret Service member. And he was like, yo, chill, like don't, like he was being, he was so legit. He was being such a, he was on his good boy behavior he's like don't fuck around with a secret service like don't know jokes no none of that shit like he was prepping his boys and then we had put a rig underneath his car kind of like you know how like a self winding watch has a weight that isn't you know that when it flips it spins so it oh yeah the weight goes or I don't even

know what those things are called I'm'm too stupid, but we put that, it put that motor underneath the car and we put it all over on other cars in this garage and so we simulated a fake earthquake. So the car was shaking, other cars were shaking and we'd make smoke and noise and meh, meh, meh, and it was all this, so he was sitting in the car, we just had to keep him in the car

so he would feel it shake like it's an earthquake the whole time and he had to keep him in the car so he would feel it shake like it's an earthquake the whole time. And he had a full on panic like Drake. Shout out to Drake, baby from Canada. He was just like, he was like, yo, yo, yo. He grabbed onto his boy, he held him real tight. It was hilarious, dude. Yeah, use that in the disc, Hendrick, use that in the disc.

I would have fucking been shitting myself or something like that. Dude, he was freaking out. Ha ha ha. And then we had my wife who played in the earlier sketch and she was pregnant and she came on, she's like, what's going on? So you see this pregnant woman in the middle

of an earthquake and Drake was like, Drake was like, stay away from the car. This is the Secret Service car. You can't come near the car. So funny, dude. Yeah, we had some wild, wild bits, but yeah, that one was good. You have to ask Taylor about it.

Yeah, I'll see if she was trying to sell it or not. Yeah, she might have been. I don't know. When I saw it, I thought I bought it. I bought it and tell you. Yeah, they did it right. Well, that does it for No Dumb Questions. Brought to you by Tommy John.

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what your welcome to the NFL moment, what would you say was your welcome to stand-up moment? That's a good question. I think- Or welcome to comedy moment. Yeah, you know, like I think a big moment in my comedy life, and there's been so many, like honestly, like there's moments where you go, wow, this is amazing.

This is amazing. This is like, I can't believe that. But I think like the earliest one would be the first club to pass me was the Hollywood Improv, the historic Hollywood Improv. And they passed me, and this is wild. I can show you, this is the craziest thing. I was in Las Vegas visiting my friend Sean,

that guy that used to watch Dumb and Dumber with me. He was living in Vegas for a stint because he took a job out there. And I have it right here on 10s. It's the oldest email I kept, 10162009 from The Hollywood Improv. Hello there, let me know this is your first paid set as a regular.

And I was the first person on the list and it was from 1016, which is my birthday. Nice. I got this email on my birthday from Eric, the old Booker at the Improv. It was meant to be. And this was a moment, I was in Vegas and my mom was there and my best friend's mom was there. They were visiting him.

We were all having like a family thing. And that was like, I don't know, that was just a really amazing, important moment in my life that it was like, wow, okay, I finally get to work at this club, you know? And it wasn't like that was it, you know what I mean? That was just my end, like you're in now, now you get to try to come work and keep your spot

and perform every week and see if we let you come back and see if we book you. So it was kind of like a testing ground. But they're saying yes to you getting in. And that was a massive moment. That when the store passed me right after that, and then little moments like that. But that one was something special.

That was like really wild to receive that on my birthday. That's cool as fuck. Yeah, that it's like you're now gonna be accepted into the lineups you can call in and request spots. It doesn't mean you would get them, but you'd say, hey, I'm available, I'd love to work if I can work, so. Yeah, so fucking dope.

That's the grind forever, that's what you had to do for years and years and years and try to keep your spots. It's just like what you guys had to do. It's like, if you don't perform, you may not play. Yeah, you get to the big leagues, man. Yeah, you have to perform. This is dope. Yeah, it was cool, man.

Right. That was like my entry level in sports terms, that was the farm league, you know what I mean That's just dope. Yeah, it was cool, man. Right. That was like my entry level to, in sports terms, that was the farm league, you know what I mean? I was in the farm league, and getting brought up means you get to be on the big shows. And then sometimes you go back down to the farm leagues for a little while. Yeah.

Sometimes you go back to the AAA. You just gotta get good batting practice in, you know what I mean? Yeah, you gotta keep going. Honestly, that was the coolest, because we used to have, I think it was a AAA team, just outside of Cleveland, called the Lake Erie Captains.

And whenever a guy was kinda coming off an IR or kinda just wanted to get his swing back or something, like I remember Omar Veskel playing for the captains for two games, and I just happened to be going out there because the tickets were $5 and it was a fun way to watch a baseball game and hang out and honestly just like fuck around as a kid. Yeah.

And I got to see Omar Viscale play in the Lake Erie captains and it was like, what the fuck, even the big dogs playing still? So it's like, yeah, you were just, going to get your swing in. Going to get my swing in. We saw, when I was living in Long Beach when I first moved here,

Konseiko played for Long Beach's like minor league squad or something like that. They were in Long Beach. And we went down there to see Jose Konseiko play. That was like the weirdest thing ever. It was like him playing against little kids. He was enormous. Yeah, basically it was like,

it was like Konseco playing against like a local minor league team or something like that. It was so weird. And I was like, what, why is he doing? I don't know what he was doing, but we went down there and saw him when I was staying in Long Beach. And I was like, this is kind of fun to see.

And the difference is incredible. When you see it, you're like, oh yeah, that's why he was a pro. I mean, this, I think he pitched. a pro. I mean, I think he pitched. I'm almost crazy, but I think he pitched. Look up Jose Kinseko pitching in Long Beach. I'm almost positive he pitched. I'm telling you, it was nuts.

It was like a minor league. He did, right? It's true? Yeah. This is true, what? God damn it, Jose. So what was the name of the team? He pitched for...

Lats. How do you pitch with Lats? Yeah. Well, he threw underhand. Damn it, Jose. So what was the name of the team? He pitched for... How do you pitch with lats? Yeah. Well, he threw underhand. Jay, he threw, it was it. He was tossing underhand. It was wild to watch him go do that. Yeah, it was nuts.

Well, in standup, constantly touring all over the country, man. Yes. You are the traveler. Is there any city where you feel like you consistently just absolutely kill it? That's so tough. My favorite cities to perform probably would be Seattle, Portland, San Francisco, LA, San Diego, Phoenix, Nashville, Dallas, Chicago, Milwaukee,

Minneapolis, New York, New Jersey, Philly, Baltimore, Washington DC, Charleston, Nashville. Just come on down. No, you know what? I really couldn't even, like truthfully, I couldn't even tell you, I would say hometown, Chicago. Chi time!

I have the most fun going home. Chicago! I have the most fun going home. Chicago! It means the most to me. It's like just, I don't know, going home. You know what it's like to go home. You're like, it's just something else, but Chicago and Philly. I'm a hit in Philly and Boston.

Though they always have treated me so well. KC does me real, real good. St. Louis does me a little dirty. I'm not going to lie. I know because I'm a Chicago kid. I get it. But Casey's always been good to me. St. Louis has been all right. Dallas and and the West Coast has always blessed me really well. The West Coast always does me well.

But nothing like going home to Chicago to me. It's more like probably just have more fun. Just seeing family. Yeah. Just because like we have all of our family and friends come out home, dude. Chicago to me, it's more like- Probably just have more fun. Just seeing family. Yeah, just cause like we have all of our family and friends come out and they bring their friends. And this year we had an after party at the Chicago theater and it was like, I don't know, 120 people or something.

Yeah, it was great. It was like, that's more what it's about is like getting the family and the friends to just go goof off. You know what I mean? I tell everybody, man, win, lose, obviously love winning more, man, but I thoroughly enjoy going up to the suite after football games and seeing all the friends and family, man, it immediately, like,

obviously if we win, the energy's up, it's a fuckin', yeah, we get to party even more and have more fun, but being so grateful for getting to where you are in this world and being able to share that excitement and that success with the people that you grew up with, man, and the people that you're with now, man, it's just the absolute best.

That's the reason to do it. I mean, I said this in the car to my sister and her best friend who are with me, and I said, I think the only thing that's cool about being an adult is that when you start to make money in your career, you get to enjoy it with your friends and your family, people that you love. The only reason for me to get more career success

is I can have more fun with my parents and my family, my friends and do more fun stuff. To me, that's the only, I don't know, there is no other reason to do it other than using that to have more, be able to have more fun and more To me, that's the only, I don't know, there is no other reason to do it other than using that to have more, be able to have more fun and more access for fun. Yeah. Yeah. And get a sports car.

True. True. There you go. What is the better comedy town, Philly or KC? You gotta pick one. What's a better comedy town, Philly or KC? Yeah. Don't look at me.

Oh, bro. This is so mean. There's just more people. There's way more people in Philly. Yeah, that's look at me. Oh, bro. This is so mean. There's just more people. There's way more people in Philly. Yeah, that's a little unfair. More people, more funny people, more confidence. Yeah, you have to go toe to toe. You have to go cities of similar size,

like Indianapolis, Kansas City. That would be similar in size, I bet, right? Well, which one's better between Indianapolis and Kansas City? Yeah, Kansas City, there's no doubt about that. Yeah, there's no doubt about that. Per capita, Kansas City's better between Indianapolis and Kansas City? Yeah, Kansas City. There's no doubt about that. Yeah, there's no doubt about that. I'm fine, I'm fine. Per capita, Kansas City's crushing it.

Let me ask you this. I've always been interested in... I've loved stand-up comedy my whole life. Travis and I used to watch Comedy Center Presents. We've always been infatuated with stand-up. What would be the way you would recommend to me or anybody else that's never done it to go try it, like an open mic. Try a mic, yeah.

Is there like a strategy that you would recommend? I mean, if somebody's really wanting to do it, I mean, I would highly suggest not doing it for everybody. If that's my first piece of advice. Are you sick of kind of seeing this everybody? Yeah, I'm gonna go up there and have some fun and do it. Well, a lot of people are like the funniest guy in their group of friends,

or like the funniest dude at the office, but they don't understand like the thing to do the thing. It's like, there's like another gear. Yeah. And it's also, it becomes, if it's your career, it becomes a lifestyle. It embodies everything that you like. It's everything.

You've dedicated so many years. You know, I started when I'm in 06, 07. And so it's like, you really have to, and I'm starting to get recognized now as a standup. It's, you know, I took, it takes a long time to really do it. I think a lot of people think they can, but I would say if you wanna just do it for the fun of it,

yeah, go hit a local, yeah, hit a- Yeah, just, I'm not talking about making a career of it. I'm talking about just go have fun for a week. I would say hit a local open mic and try. And a lot of clubs will have open mics on like Sundays or Mondays in your city, depending. And I would say give it a whirl and see if it does something for you.

It could just be therapeutic, you know what I mean, where it's like, this is good to just get it out. And if you can't afford therapy, go to your local open mic, that's free. You can always yell about your dad at a local open mic in Poughkeepsie. Whatever makes you feel good in the end of the day. But yeah, I would say go to a mic and try it. God, that's good. I would love to see you two cats come and do it. I would love to set something up for you guys to go do it.

Jay, would you be down? Yeah, let's. So our next bit here is fans send us all sorts of crazy shit. What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried to give you at a show? The distance. Yeah. He's on the TV and he's not. He's not, he's not here.

Jason, would you wanna open, maybe give it just a run? How, I purposely. You're not here, you didn't hear him. No, he heard it. I'll do it. If you do it with me, I'll do it. No, this isn. You didn't hear him. Now he heard it. I'll do it. If you do it with me, I'll do it. No, this isn't a hand-in-hand thing.

We'll see who can make more laughs. All right, well, let's go. Don't make it a challenge. Challenge. Challenge. Let's get it on. What was the question? What did you say?

What was that second question, though? Oh, fans send us all sorts of crazy shit. What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried to give you at a show? What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried to give you at a show? What's the weirdest thing a fan has ever tried to give me at a show? I mean, I've gotten, look, I've gotten a lot of drugs. Drugs are definitely a gift that people give you. Nice, that's fun.

But the wildest thing is there's always a guy that comes in, well, a dude will come with like a pill jar and he's like, hey, well, yeah. And I'm like, I'm not taking that. It's like the guess your favorite jelly bean? Like what is this? Yeah, yeah, and I'm like, I'm not taking that. It's like the guess your flavor jelly bean? Like what is this? It's probably, it's a good rule with,

don't take random pills from people. They give you a, they'll be like, this is DMT or whatever, and I'm always like, I'm not taking this, but I will give it to a friend that I don't like that much. I will give them, let them have it. You give it to Bobby and all of a sudden he's naked on stage.

Yeah, exactly. We've gotten some, but Bobby and I have gotten on tour. I will say the fans are incredible. The art that they've given us is beautiful. Like some of these artists make such incredible stuff. And that's why on Bad Friends, like our studio is built with tons of art. Yeah, like we do that.

We put up all the art that people give us and we cycle it out as often as we can But we've gotten some really heartfelt gifts Bobby got a ring that Somebody's father had during the Korean War and I thought that was such an amazing We get a lot of sober chips because Bobby sober we get a lot of those chips And I get a lot of golf stuff, which I think is really nice all the fans know So they always get me golf hats or golf balls

or cool little trinkets, but nothing ever like, oh, we did get, that's not true, we did get ashes of somebody's passed away, mother or father, I don't quite remember, unfortunately. We got a little bit of ashes, yeah, and we lost it. Our tour manager was like, I think we put the ashes on the thing and I was like, I don't know.

So sorry to that person, your dad is in... Doesn't sound like they really... Somewhere else. They didn't really care that much. I have no idea. No, it was a nice thought. They were like, I want you to have a little bit. What do you do with...

I was gonna put it on my eggs. I mean, I have no idea. I don't know what you... A little salt and pepper. A little salt and gonna put it on my eggs. I mean, I don't know. I don't know what you're. A little salt and pepper. A little salt and pepper, a little daddy eggs. I don't know, yeah. Oh my goodness. We've gotten some weird, strange stuff,

but nothing too dark. Well, besides the ashes. Yeah, but the ashes was kind of a nice, it was like a nice, I get it. I get what they were trying to do. Yeah, sentimental. All right, let's get the Chicago fandom We got the NFL draft coming up and you guys are sitting in the pole position. What are you hoping they do?

Yeah, I will say do we what we believe in my boy? And Caleb do we believe him do you I do yeah, I think he's the man He's got some he's got some gamer in a man, but I'm also I've always I've said this pretty adamantly I like Justin Fields. I've always I always supported the guy. I thought he's the man. He's got some gamer in him, man. But I've also, I've said this pretty adamantly. I like Justin Fields. I've always, I always supported the guy. I thought he was great. I enjoyed him. Look, the system maybe wasn't working.

We have a lot of things going on in Chicago, as people know. Virginia McCasky, I think is, I think she's 186 now. I think you guys can look that up. She's a little bit older. She's a little bit older. She's a little bit older. She sawed off pipes for the original.

Yeah, for the original. Yeah, for the original pipes. The Soldier Stadium. Yeah, she built Soldier Field. It's a little tough. I think the Bears need some fixing and I believe in Caleb. I think he's gonna do some great stuff.

I really genuinely do, I hope. And you have to, unfortunately, because we've had, you guys know, the Bears just have been beating up so much. And even when we start sniffing over 500, we bring ourselves back down to reality every season. I do think you guys got a good GM right now. I thought Ryan was a great, I think he was head of,

I'm not sure what his position was in KC, but I- He scouted for you guys? Oh yeah, he was big, he was, yeah. He helped us build a lot of what we got. Yeah. Or at least he's been there the entire time I've been there and I've seen him in the building really working. Yeah.

You don't get those kind of jobs without getting, you know, a good resume build. No, look, I think we're really constructing what could be really great for the Bears. I mean, we really, you know, the problem with Chicago teams, we always say that we're rebuilding. It's like we've been rebuilding for a long time. We've been rebuilding since I was born on Earth,

but it is what it is. I mean, look, and I'll support them forever. I do get a lot of shit online for being, for supporting you. I get a lot of shit for that. Whenever I wear a KC, everyone's like, oh really, you're a Chiefs fan now that they're winning? I was like, that's for my boys.

I'm just supporting my friends. But people really clap at me about that. So I can't stand that. Cause they're like. Maybe the Bears should get some guys who just love to rip it on the golf course with Cheeto, man. Yeah. That's what I'm fuckin' talkin' about.

Yeah, come on. Come play golf with me, then I'll support you. No, I'm a Chicago sports fan. Come on, Cole? Yeah, Cole's a local boy. He's a dog. We love him. I love watching him play.

But I'm gonna support the Bears again and again. It's hard, it's just really tough. Particularly when you spoil me and I come see you guys, and that sucks. I was like, how come my team can't do that? I like that, that's what I like. The trophy, I like, well we want one of those. Out of all the Chicago teams, which one's top dog?

Bears, Cubs, Bulls, Blackhawks? For me, Cubs. I grew up, obviously I grew up, for me as a kid, it was basketball and baseball. The Bears were a little bit later in my life because I played basketball and baseball. I never played football. I mean, I did play football and then I got a concussion

and my dad was like, no more. I was like, no more, that's it. I'm tapping out. No more. Namas. What position? Well, this is funny. I got a, in junior high, I was a safety

and I love playing, I love playing defense. And then our kicker got hurt. Yeah. And the coach was like, Santino's athletic enough, he can kick. You just kick, just all you gotta do is kick it away. Yeah. And the kid snapped the ball over my head, like seven feet.

And I jumped as high as I could. And I used to be able to hop. We have pictures I can send you guys of me dunking in college. Woo! Daddy used to be able to hop. Okay. Now I have sciatica.

He snapped the ball like seven feet over my head and I remember looking up being like, as I jumped I remember going, shit. Like I knew it was way gone. Full slow motion. So I ran back to grab the ball and I'm looking over kind of out of my peripheral and the coach is like, kick it, kick it.

But I knew I couldn't kick on the run, you know what I mean, on that turn and run. You couldn't run the pun at any? No way, dude. It wasn't taught that way. No way, that's so hard. And so then I just started sprinting up the line and I was making way and I see the first down

and then, meh! Yeah. And I woke up and my dad was over me, he's like, you got your bell rung! That's what he kept saying. You got your bell rung! Dude, I was gone. I was.

And after that I was like, no more football! You remember Sean Taylor in the Pro Bowl game? Oh, oh. He rocked that fucking kicker on the fake field goal. Dirty. The other punter. Dude, that's what this is taking me back to right now. Oh, dude, the pain was unbe-

Cause it blindsided me too, cause I'm running up the side. I don't see this dude coming out of this side. I got smoked, and it was helmet to helmet. Back then, in junior high, helmet to helmet, they like cheered it on. They were like, yeah! Yeah, spear him! Spear him in the head with your head.

So I stopped playing football and then. Dude, Pernice O'Neal has a great bit about that, man. Who does? Pernice O'Neal, RIP. I think he's passed, I'm not sure. Patrice, Patrice O'Neal? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Dude, he has a good bit about how it was just back in the day, it was like, there wasn't, get on a knee and pray for him. We were doing a tribal dance around this man. They were dancing on top of him. Yeah, I've seen that. Yeah, yeah. Taking socks.

I quit football. And then so Cubs and Jordan, I grew up in the Jordan era. So basketball was number one for me my whole life. And then now I've, you know, I still go Cubs games, Bulls, Hawks if I can, you know, I still go Cubs, games, bulls, hawks, if I can, and bears. But yeah, Cubs are number one for me. My dog's name is Cubs, is Cubby. That's 2015, man.

I took my dad to the World Series. That was like the greatest moment of my life. I know, dude, I loved it so much. I took my dad to the World Series and I was shooting, I'm dying up here. We were shooting, we were shooting, this is, I'll tell it quickly, but we were shooting over Dodger Stadium. We were in Chavez Ravine and there was like a kickout

that's like above the stadium that looks down. And we're shooting this scene where, man, this is such a weird, I was on the show, I was mad at my father for not being a good dad and he gifted me a car. And I wanted to bash the car to pieces because I hated him so much. And we were at night, we were shooting the scene

where I was bashing this car over Dodger Stadium about my dad that I hated who did me wrong. But I was trying to shoot the scene as fast as I could because I had to leave that night to get to the airport for a four or five a.m. flight to Chicago to make it to get to the World Series to take my dad. Yeah, so fucking cool. Got to the airport on time, I'm on the plane

and the flight is delayed and I'm having like a panic attack like oh I'm gonna miss the World Series and I remember I was in the Galley way and I called my dad and I was like I think I'm gonna miss the World Series and I started just bawling. I was bawling. And my old man was like, it's okay, it's okay. And I go, you can take someone,

just take someone to the game. He's like, no, I'm not gonna go without you. Just sell the tickets. Just get on StubHub or Take a Master and sell the tickets. Dude, tell me you made it. And then dude, and then I hung up the phone and the flight attendant was like, I think we're maybe gonna take off

in the next half an hour, praying to God. We take off and I am like, please, please, please make this. Please, please, please. Just let me get an inning. This is my hand to God. I landed and I jumped in a cab and I threw the guy all the money I had in my pocket.

And I said, please get me to Wrigley Field as illegally as you can. And he was driving, I'm not kidding, he was driving on the shoulder of the highway, like just on the shoulder we're driving. And he was like, if I get a ticket, you're paying. I'm like, no, I don't care, you're driving on the shoulder of the highway, like just on the shoulder we're driving. And he was like, if I get a ticket, you're paying. I'm like, no, I don't care, no doubt. And I get there and I met my dad in front of Wrigley,

we have a picture of it, as they were singing the national anthem. He was waiting outside. The fucking gold! Yeah! It was the wildest. You hear that Chicago? It was the wildest moment.

All that shit you fucking talking about the Chi-Town kid not loving the city. You fucking kidding me? It was amazing, so I got to go, and we still lost that game, but I had such a good time. I got a similar, not as fucking cool as that. That is awesome.

Yeah, it was wild. But I did take, I took top of the toss to the World Series, sat right behind, home plate up there, and progressive field, but as me and Jason know, Jacobs field. Jacobs field, right, yeah, you don't call it that. Man, I'm telling you, those moments, they're the absolute best.

I remember my dad throwing me on the rapid. And you get off right there at the Gateway District, man, and you just, it's like the times have changed. Like dad would just go up and get a fucking nosebleed seat and we'd go and see the Indians, and then of course I'm taking them to the fucking world. So it was the coolest fucking moment ever. It was such a big special thing to do

and I'm stoked that I was able to do it. It was just like, it was incredible. I'll never forget it. Your dad's a real one. He's like, just sell the tickets. I don't even, it's not you. I don't wanna go. I loved him for that.

I said, just take, you know his buddy John, I was like, just take John. Just take John to the game. He would, he'll appreciate it. I loved him for that. I said, just take, you know, his buddy John, I was like, just take John, just take John to the game. He would appreciate it. Harvey would like the game. And he was like, no, I'm not going without you. Just sell the tickets. And I literally was on one of the ticket apps

and I was contemplating hitting sell now. Like I was, I held it open and I was like, gosh, I just sell these tickets. I should just sell them. I'm never gonna make this. And luckily she was like, just sit down. I think we might be able to do it in 30 minutes. And I was like, please God.

And then by the way, the whole flight, I was just chugging whiskey, double whiskies. But I was like, please make it, please make it. Gotta be primed, gotta be primed. Gotta be prepped and ready. Can't enjoy Wrigley. How has that been, seeing that entire community outside of Wrigley?

What the Ricketts did to that whole thing is bananas. I mean, it's like a commute. When I was a kid, it was, I mean, it was just like a, it was just a little scumbag central for like party animal. Now it's like high end. You can go get like a nice meal before the game. It used to be just like a shitty McDonald's and a bunch of sports bars.

And now it's like hotels and restaurants. And I mean, it's beautiful though. I mean, they really did make it look like an event. You know what I mean? Like you can bring your full family there and it really is like a whole to do. You can spend a whole day down there having a good time. Especially day games.

Day games are, day games at Wrigley are the best. They didn't start playing night games till fucking. Yeah like 10 days ago. Yeah. Yeah we were too cheap for lights. Yeah. We were too broke to throw lights out. That's cool though.

You know, fuck it. This is how we play baseball. Yeah. In the sun. By cooking in the sun in the bleacher bums with their shirts off, just blacked out sunburn. It is like, that is Wrigley personified. Beautiful, beautiful young women,

like young blonde women and just blacked out dudes, shirts off, fatted out right next to them. That's a Wrigley iconic image. Now I'm sold. I've always been a diehard, just want to go to every stadium there is, every sporting event there is. Wrigley's been at the top of the list for years,

so we gotta do it, dude. The best. Let's go. I'm down. Whenever you're not touring. We have to at least go out to the bleachers. I know you want to sit like, you want to sit like Trav, but we gotta go out there.

When it comes to, I wanna be in the shit. We should go out there for a minute. I wanna be in the shit. You won't last long, but we should go out there. I promise you, I blend like the tree. I blend with the trees. I blend with the best of them, I'm a birdie. Just one, is that Travis Kalci?

Just one of those. Jonas Valvachunas. Oh, is that Valvachunas? Oh, it is, yeah. All right, we're good. That's what I thought it was. Yeah, my doppelganger is, I keep getting tagged with Spencer Turnbull.

He's a Philly, he's a Philly boy, right? Spencer Turnbull. He's a picture for the Phillies. Oh, okay. Isn't he a picture for the Phillies, right? I haven't seen him. Spencer Turnbull, yeah. The name does ring a bell. Dude, you gotta see this guy.

It's like, people keep tagging me. They're like, you look exactly like this, yeah. The name does ring a bell. Dude, you gotta see this guy. It's like, people keep tagging me. They're like, you look exactly like this, dude. It's almost creepy. Dude, when the violence units got drafted, I immediately. Definitely was just talking to this guy in the film. You know this guy.

Right before you threw out the first pitch. Full on 15 to 20 minute conversation. That a boy, Jason. I was like, I could have sworn I met this guy. Oh my gosh. People tag me. People are like, this is you, bro. That's so good.

Right away. It's ridiculous. I mean, he is very handsome, I'll say that. So shout out to Spencer Turbill. Yeah, he's a Philly now. He was in Detroit before, and now he's in Philly. Speaking of like sitting in the stands, I love sitting in the stands as well.

Kylie and I one time, this was before Kylie got famous, but in Philly, it's always hard to go to the sporting events, but I got a full on like disguise. They're like old, like Mr. Potato Head, like glasses. Which only makes you stand out more. For sure, but people don't know, they're like, who the hell is that guy? Just to sit in the outfield and it lasted by four innings. But yeah, either way. It's so fun. Can I come with you guys? You are more than welcome. Legendary Cub pitcher Rick suckliff. Yeah, suckliff baby suckliff has been telling me to bring my ass out there for years. I owe it to him. He's a

Kansas City guy. He grew up in KC, big Chiefs fan, but he's been telling me I gotta hit Wrigley with him. What are we waiting for, my guy? Dude, honestly, I don't know at this point. Let's do it, let's go. It's gonna happen now. We're going. We're doing it.

You'll see us, Wrigley. You'll see us, we'll be out there, baby. Let's get to a little, we gotta ask but you don't have to answer. Okay, great. That's always a fun game. Jason, you wanna tee it up? Love it.

Sure, moving on to our last segment, we gotta ask, you don't have to answer, this segment is sponsored by Lazy Boy. Join the movement, take a moment on the most comfortable furniture out there, long live the Lazy. All right, you talked about the time Pat drank 23 Coors lights during the course

of two of your stand-up shows. That's right, yeah. He stayed for not one, but two. Oh yeah. He doubled down because that's how fucking funny Cheeto is. All right, were you surprised that he could drink like that? Oh my God. Well, first of all, people that know Pat know

like he loves them Coors, baby. Let's get them Coors. Let's get them Coors. That mountain water. That mountain water. That mountain water, blue. I'm drinking. At the first show, the wild thing was,

that was in Dallas at the Addison Improv. And the wild thing was we were that was in Dallas at the Addison Improv and the wild thing was during the first show, I just assumed they were gonna have a drink or two, watch the show and then leave. I was like, they got somewhere to be. And when they told me he drank them out of Coors Lights, I for real thought they were joking, but the club was like, no, we actually have to go buy more.

We just, we ran out of Coors Lights. And it was like, you know, I was like, that's not even a real thing. And they were like, no, I mean, obviously people in the room were drinking them, but they were like, your party drank a fair amount of Coors Lights. And then when the second show came around,

I thought, well, he's only probably only gonna have a few. We're not gonna like, you know what I mean? Like you'll probably have a few because then Daniel might have gone, but no, he smoked whatever they gave him there. He just bashed all of those easy. Then we went out and he was like, let's go to this Mexican restaurant

and get food and hang out. And we did. And then he smashed another probably dozen. And then he's like, who was at the club? Maybe he wanted to go to the club to go see somebody. Maybe it was Des or something. I don't even remember who it was. And he was like, yeah, let's go meet them at the club.

Then it was another like dozen Coors, this dude. I was like, I see why you're sponsored, dude. Surprisingly coherent the entire time. Oh yeah, dude, he's functional. There's no like, oh, Pat's gone. No, he was smashing through them Coors, dude. Those silver bullets were going down easy, baby. Was a little surprised at first, then I got used to it.

All righty, when Rob McElhany came on the show, we talked about the time the two of you made fun of Travis for wearing a Rolex on the golf course. Do you remember this? Oh, fuck, dude. On the, remember when I went to Lakeside? Yeah, this guy had an all gold Rolex. He had an all gold Rolex to come play golf in.

I had just got it, I didn't know where to put it. I didn't want to throw it in the golf bag. It was hilarious. I just started ripping it with it on. Did you get that? He just won one of those claw machines. I was like, where did you get that from, dude? Is that?

Why are you wearing that on the golf course? It was so shiny. I'll tell you a good embarrassing story about Rob McElhenney, he won't like this at all. We were playing on, Trav had just, you two had just played with us or were just about to play with you and we were doing a round

and we were on a little par three. Mack put one like over the fence into the river and he took his club. I want to say it's like a wedge. And there's bushes, but there's also one of those crossed linked fences behind the bush. He threw it so hard, it went through that fence, through the bushes, and the LA River sits below it, and it's all concrete.

Most of the time, it's not, no water in it. You could hear, bing-ba-da-bing-ba-da-bing. You heard his club bounce off of the concrete. And me and the two dudes were playing with silence. I didn't say a word. I was like, oh dude, I'm not gonna talk to him for the rest of the day. And he goes, and now when I tell that story,

I'm like, dude, you know, Mack threw a club one time through the fence and he's like, I don't do that. I don't do that anymore. That's not something I do anymore. I was like, okay, man, but you did. You did it once. Yeah, you did it once.

It happened. Yeah, he was fine. So you send the ball into the river again. Yeah, you did it once. But it happened. It happened. Yeah, he was fine. So you sent the ball into the river again. Yeah, he sent the ball and the club into the river. Yeah, but Trav, when he came out wearing a big shiny Rolex, I was like, how are you gonna swing this thing on? And we kept making fun of him the whole time,

but you know, he stayed his course. Once it was on, you gotta eat it. Yeah, you have to. Again, that's playground rules. Didn't they take it off? No, you can't take it off. That's more embarrassing. Yeah. A dream foursome. Okay, you have to. Again, that's playground rules. Then they take it off. No, you can't take it off. That's more embarrassing. No, you can't.

Yeah, a dream foursome. Okay, golfers and non-golfer? That's tough, yeah. Tiger, for sure, 100%. Jordan. Jordan. Cause I know he's a big golf dog. Shot down kid, man.

God, I'm trying to think of non-golfers too, cause my brain just goes automatically to golfers. Tiger, Jordan, Kim Jong-un. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Larry Davis. Yeah, probably Larry would definitely be up there. I would say let's throw him in the mix. But that's what's tough is there's so many dudes that I would kill to play with, but Tiger for sure and MJ. I would love to play those two cats alone.

I mean, you get those two on the golf course. I just wanna see the competition. I know, that's all I wanna see. They've had to have played together and it was just the most epic round of all time. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, Tiger, Tiger and MJ, whenever you guys wanna play. Give me a call.

You've been on a ton of TV shows. Which one specifically do people most recognize you on? I mean, Dave is probably, because it's the most recent. Dave, people see me the most on, or when we were shooting the show. So I think that one a lot, I'll get like, I did my first sitcom that failed was called Mixology. It's weird, sometimes I'll get like an aunt,

you know, like your aunt Janine, you know, when I'm out. It'll be like, were you on a show called Mixology? I'll get that sometimes, which is wild. Lasted one season on ABC and got crushed. But I did, I've done so many like small little bit rolls too, rest of development, no one really, that snuck on that. I did Curb and I, so people will see me from that sometimes because that was a couple years ago,

which was like one of the best experiences of my entire life. So dope. It was wild. And, but mostly Dave, like almost always Dave now because it was such a big show on FX for a hot minute and hopefully Ricky's to Nicky will be what more and more people see. Fuck yeah. And then who knows what's next? I mean I have a new show that we're working on now for me so

fingers crossed. All about whiskey baby. Let's fucking go. All about whiskey baby and we need and we need a big bearded big bearded guy in the barrel room so Jason if you're available. I mean yeah I'm free. Okay, yeah, are you busy? Are you working? I'm jobless. Actually, currently I officially don't have a job. Well, let's employ you, man. I would love to employ you.

All right, perfect. Well, Wikipedia has a list of a myriad of reasons, myriad of things that they have on there, as you're known as. Slugger, Santino, the Red Rocket. Yeah. That he is avoiding, time out, I gotta bring this up. Orange.

He's avoiding a word that's on this rundown because he doesn't know the word. But I used another good word. You did, you navigated it well. Wait, what's the word? Let me see, can I see what the word is? Hold on, let me see. I think it's penis.

Hold on, hold on, hold on, where are we looking looking Wikipedia has an official list of your pseudonyms? All right pseudonyms He's always get me the silent pee hey if it's a PS it's that's tough. Yeah PS is a tough but I Don't blame this is what we don't blame Travis for this This is this is the whoever wrote that name that word in there. How dare you? You can't say you're not proud of me, but he said myriad myriad was good that way He was right. You have a litany you could say litany. Oh litany of another one litany You did use some big words there. You nailed that my pseudonyms on wiki. Yeah, the slugger Santino that came from When I was a young lad in Chicago.

We grew up in downtown Chicago, my mom and I, when she was still a single mother, and I would fight a lot. I liked to fight often. Fuck yeah. Yeah. It was like one of my favorite things. Oh, hell yeah. I was kicked out of a few different places for fighting.

I think I got kicked out of preschool for fighting, which is bananas. Dude. But they called me Slugger. Welcome to the team. Yeah, and then I out of preschool for fighting, which is bananas. Dude, welcome to the team. Yeah, and then I went to Moody Bible, which people know. And they asked me to leave politely. They asked because of my mom was like, you kicking him out? They're like, we're asking him to no longer attend.

Nobody wants to leave with a black eye. Very non-Catholic of him to punch everyone in the face that he doesn't like. So they called, so they, yeah, Slugger Santino was born from that. And the Red Rocket was a natural, that was a great play on a dog's penis nickname for me because I'm the Red Rocket. Because I'm a big Red Rocket.

What's the other one? Agent Orange? Agent Orange is not me, I'd never heard of that, but I like that, I'll take it. That's a good one. I'll take that, I like Agent Orange. Cheeto Dust Cultivator? Yeah, I think that's just someone playing

with Cheeto Santino, yeah, I think that one. I think that one's just a rendition of it. The Last of the Great Gingers. Joe Rogan said that one time on his podcast and that stuck. I think Joe introduced me on his podcast as the last of the great gingers and that kind of made its way somehow onto Wikipedia.

It's so funny. It's like someone said something once like seven years ago and then it landed. Out of those ones right there we just listed. I think Agent Orange is, I should start going by that. I think that's amazing. I mean that's like my men in black code. And you know what, on men in black

they make you look into that pen, but they just have to look into my hair. I just stare down as a. Like Medusa man. Especially me in the winter dude. This is, look at this dude, ghostly, you know what I mean? I can't wait for summertime to get burnt. Yeah.

I just get a little, just one more shade of orange. That's all I get. I get a little, I turn into burnt orange. Sounds like a Mountain Dew, like, new flavor. Agent Orange. Agent Orange, like I feel. They did have Code Red. Code Red was, I mean, it still is a thing, a Taco Bell.

Oh, Code Red could be me, but Agent Orange sounds really good, yeah, I do like it. I mean, the history of it is not good, but I'll take the, we a thing, a Taco Bell. A cold red could be me, but Agent Orange sounds really good, yeah, I do like it. I mean, the history is not good, but I'll take the, we'll take the current word play. Yeah. Yeah. So the history's not so good, but whatever. The eyes are just a little different.

Whatever, man, we still drink Irish Car Bombs and that's not cool, you know what I mean? I still fucking, oh yeah, no, I'm not gonna be saying. Yeah, that's not a cool, that's not like a happy piece of history, but we're fine with that. Alrighty, I'm not sure you saw this, but I talked about losing my Super Bowl ring last week

in a pool of chili on our last episode. Yeah. Zero, like he has, what is it, remorse? Like he doesn't give a fuck that he just lost the Super Bowl ring. Yeah, why? Cause they'll just get you another one? No, I mean, I care, I care.

It's not like I'm like happy I lost it, but I'm not like. How do you lose? I mean, that seems such a hard thing to lose. Well, you don't lose it, somebody steals it. We have some videotape, we have some video evidence. We have some video evidence. What's the most expensive thing that I've lost or sentimental thing that I've lost?

Cause that's, that thing's probably gotta be more sentimental of a loss for you, right? Than like pricey, yeah. For sure, yeah. I mean, it's expensive too, but it's definitely the sentimental nature of it, which sucks for sure. I think what's like the most expensive thing

I've ever like lost? I mean, you know what? This is not in price, but it's funny you say that. That red rocket was a nickname I did for like a tour. And we had an artist draw this great piece of art and They made me like a custom red rocket hat and I love that hat It had two Rs on it and I was racing out of my Uber to the airport and I left that in the uber and as I closed the door

And I watched it drive away. I was gonna miss my flight and I was like Should I call this dude to turn around and I like slowly drive away. I was gonna miss my flight, and I was like, should I call this dude to turn around? And I slowly was like, goodbye, sweet hat. It killed me, because it was one of one. It was the only one, and I was bummed. So whoever got in that Uber got my red rocket hat. Yeah.

It broke my heart. It was a bummer, because it was like, I love that hat, man. It was a one of one, and it was a cool gift from my buddy. So that sucked, and that was only a couple of months ago. But in the history of like losing stuff, there's nothing that I've like, the amount of times I've left AirPods somewhere is comical.

Sure. I've gifted the world seven AirPods. At least for me. Oh my God, dude. I've left them so many places or they fall out of my pocket. My car key is down there. It's not even in my pocket. It's this, like it fell out of my pocket. My car key is down there. It's not even in my pocket. It's this, like it fell out of my pocket.

Mine definitely did, that's me. It happens all the time. The company is genius. Yeah dude, I have an extra pair of brand new AirPods at my house right now just in case. Just because I know I'm gonna lose it. Well, I learned this. I lost my AirPod in a seat of the airplane

and the guy was like, we can try to get it for you. I got off of the plane, I waited. They're like picking apart the seat. The technician was picking it apart. And then he goes, I see it right there. And I was like, oh shit, awesome. And I go, can you get it? He goes, no, no chance.

I was like, oh, okay. Why did we wait? What was the point of waiting? Damn it. But you know, I don't know if you know this, tip for everybody. If you lose one AirPod, you can order a single AirPod.

You don't have to buy, yes, I swear. I went to the Apple store, I asked him, he's like, no, we can do a single order for one because this happened so much. Because I assumed I just needed to buy a new, but he was like, no, no, no, you can get a singular AirPod. So I went to the Apple store. So shout out to Apple for that, that was huge.

How much, do you remember how much the single one was? Don't shout out Apple for anything. These assholes invented the most loosable Airpods of all time. You're right, dude, Apple, you're the worst, you're the absolute worst. Unless of course you want to write me a check. They have phones, they could have unbreakable phones. They could use glass that doesn't break,

but they purposely put it in glass that does break. Okay, I'll come back to that. I've never put a case on my phone. Jason does the same thing. And I've never broken them. Yeah, but I don't to that. I've never put a case on my phone. Jason does the same thing. And I've never broken them. Yeah. Yeah, but I don't break them. I'm not a case guy.

I've broken it at least over 20 times. Well, this has come from the guy that lost a Super Bowl ring, so this makes sense. I think this makes... Yeah, this is not, yeah. I just want you to know you're plugging Apple right now. Yeah, you're plugging them real hard. Yeah, real hard.

I might go to Apple and get a new phone now. I won't leave it though. I'm not gonna leave them. All right Tito, you're one of the most famous gingers out there, can you do a Mount Rushmore of famous gingers for us? Oh, interesting. Very good.

And you can put yourself on there. Shout out to George Washington, the original ginger. People don't know that. George Washington, he had, what? My friend, my friend, my friend, you are remembering Mr. Washington in a wig. Yes. He yes, the wig was not his hair That was a wig he was wearing. Yeah. Oh look, it's George He was a redhead you can look it up George Washington was actually a redhead. Is there photo evidence of this?

I don't know how many photographs were being snapped of GW But you can read up on it, I'm sure. I think you can read some literature about it. I would say, who else makes the Mount Rushmore of gingerlies? I mean, I probably put Ronnie Howard up there, Opie Taylor, because I got called that a lot when I was a kid. The first school I went to in Chicago, all of the black kids called me Opie.

And I hated it, because I didn't understand what it even meant, but then I thought, oh, that kid was cute from Andy Griffith's show. That's nobody on this, and nobody's listening to the show knows what that is. Unless you watch Nick at Night. Yeah, that's right, that's right, baby. That's my dad's favorite show.

My sister's over there, she can attest. My dad has watched more Andy Griffith episodes, right, than anything on Earth. It's disgusting. She confirmed it. Yeah, it's absurd. So I would say, let's give Ronnie Howard a shout out. George Washington's on there.

I don't know, do you guys have any favorite gingers you like? It's pretty, that's. I mean, we got a list of them. Oh, let me see. Does Canelo Alvarez count? Yeah, Canelo, I get called, I'm the, yeah, Canelo, I get called Canelo sometimes.

Prince Harry, he's in limbo with me right now. No, I'm kidding, I'm the, yeah, Canelo, I get called Canelo sometimes. Prince Harry, he's in limbo with me right now. No, I'm kidding. I don't. Oh yeah, Andy Dalton. Shout out to Andy Dalton. Dude, he won me a free car, man. Did he really? Yeah, he threw the ball to me for a 15 yard touchdown.

And the game was so ass at the Pro Bowl that year that it won me a free car. What kind of car was it? It was a Genesis. And who has that? I still have it. You do? Dude, yeah. Travis?

Kumar's out here sliding around. It's a company car. Yeah, Bill Burr's gotta be up there 100%. And let's give the other one to, let's say Lindsay Lohan for sure. Ha ha ha, nice. The OG Lindsay Lohan. We'll give it to her.

The Lady Gingers. She's making her second round in the biz. She's coming back, right? She's making another pop in a big way. Yeah, I think I saw her, she did an Irish movie actually not too long ago. My wife likes Hallmark movies. She did one of those and she liked it.

Yeah, I saw the same one. She loves Hallmark movies, man. Loves that, yeah. It was. Are you a Hallmark guy, Trav? You know, I dabble now. Yeah, you do. I dabble now.

Well, you like the cards, so you might as well like the movies big fan of the cards huge Fan of well, it's Kansas City based company. So is it really Hallmark? Shout out. I don't I'm throwing that out there. I think it is though a piece of me thinks that's not true at all Is it I know they are okay. I've been there from fucking 11 years I know they are. I've been there for fucking 11 years. I see it all the time.

I think it's maybe that base there, but I know it's big. Love their cards. Nice. We've mentioned on the show that conspiracy theories help bring NFL locker rooms together. Where are your conspiracy theories? Oh, for stand-up?

Yeah, no, just period. You got any good conspiracies? Oh, my conspiracy theories. Oh my God. They bring NFL locker rooms together. Like Kyrie's Flat Earth? Yeah. Well he's not the only one that thinks that,

but he's probably the most well known. What percentage of the NFL believes in Flat Earth, do you think? Dude, honestly, there's at least 10 guys, 10 to 15 guys in every locker room, I would imagine. That are hardcore Flat Earthers. I think if you took a truly anonymous poll, like nobody had to disclose their name

or anything like that, I think you're, you're over 15% of an NFL locker room. That's crazy. What? I'm telling you. That's insane. Dude, everyone gets hit in the head. It's unbelievable.

Yeah, that's true. That's true. Cheeto, I was telling this to his position coach about what percentage of guys, and the position coach, there's nobody on the team that actually thinks that. Within earshot of this conversation, one of the position goes, there's nobody on the team that actually thinks that. Within earshot of this conversation, one of the guys said, I mean, how do you know it's not? I mean, I can't stop.

Yeah, man, right on. And you gotta let him fly with that, you know? What are the other conspiracy theories I believe in? I mean, it's an endless list. I mean, which one? I mean, they're all real and true. The NFL is rigged. That one's really good.

That one I love. Ooh. Yeah. That's a good one. Jason bought it. I've seen the script. you've sent me one script. I got one script, yeah. It was pretty good. It was the game you were coming to, I wanted to make sure you knew what the script was.

Well yeah, because I was like, I'm gonna have to leave early. And Travis printed out like old MapQuest directions, he printed out exactly what I needed to stay for. Well it's because we had, he came to the Broncos game last year. That's right. In Denver. In Denver. It was the game we lost, and we had to lose a few more

for it to really look unexpected that we were gonna win the Super Bowl this year. I even said to him, I said, I'm bringing my wife's family to the Broncos game, can you take an L? This is the first time my wife's parents have ever sat in a suite. Yeah, let me call Goodell.

So he called everyone up and said if they would take an L at my ally. And everybody was in. They were like, yeah, if you lose to the Broncos. And if you notice, guys, if you rewind the footage, Travis, when the game was over, points up to my suite and just does a little wink and walks off the field. That one was a bummer.

I did not want to bother you. After the game was over, I was like, I will not be calling Travis. I will not, I will not get married. I didn't even want to call you. I'm like, God damn it, I got him taken to this fucking trash ass game. No, bro, it was such a good game.

Well, my wife's parents had never, or my wife's dad too, he had never been in a suite at Mile High and he walked in the room and he was like, wow. And I go, isn't this awesome? And he turns to his left and he goes, so much food. I was like, whatever you want, man, you can have anything you want.

Dude, I think if you clean that that out they'll actually bring another one. They'll bring more bro. It was awesome. Yeah, we had a great time. Fuck yeah. Before we wrap up, Andrew, floor's yours. Is there anything you want to ask us or say before we wrap this thing up? I love you both and I appreciate you both and I'm happy that New Heights is New Heights. It's because we sat in my house

and your penis fell out a couple years ago and now you're in the podcast game. I'm happy for it. And I wish you were here, Jay, but next time, we'll do it again next time. But that's it, I got nothing else. Come see me on the road. Go to andrewsantino.com for the tickets

and watch Bad Friends and Whiskey Ginger and I'll see you boys next time. You know it. The absolute best ladies and gentlemen. Awesome. Appreciate you coming on brother. Appreciate you bro. Wrap this thing up Jason.

All right, thank you to Andrew Santino for coming on the show. This wraps up another episode of New Heights. Make sure you subscribe to the New Heights channel on YouTube so you know when all the new episodes are coming out. We'll be back next week to talk about the NFL draft and whatever else we feel like talking about. Listen, subscribe wherever we get your podcasts. All right now. All right now. Once again, New Heights presented by Wavesports

Entertainment and brought to you by Buffalo Wild Wings. Let's go sports bar. Pro's pro right here. Jason's a little late. God damn it. Follow the show on all social media at New Heights show. For fun clips throughout the week. Thank you to our production crew. Thank you to the 90%ers. We love you guys. And thank you to Cheeto Santino for bringing the juice. We love you, brother.

Thank you, thank you, boys. Peace. ["Spring Day"]