New Heights with Jason and Travis Kelce - NFL Schedule Predictions & Colin Jost on SNL Finale, Joke Swaps and Life as the Plus One | Ep 191

Episode Date: May 13, 2026

92%ers, welcome to another episode of New Heights brought to you by Adobe Acrobat. Today, we are joined by Saturday Night Live’s own Colin Jost! First, we dispel the myth that Travis is a picky eater with a full report on the Indian food he had over the weekend, we look at all the NFL scheduling rumors we know so far, and answer your not-dumb questions about NFL Pokémon and living inside a Disney movie. Later, we sit down with Colin Jost and get his thoughts on the upcoming SNL finale, why he’s terrified of his annual joke swap with Michael Che, the surprise Lorne meeting that landed him the SNL job, his honest take on Travis as host, why it’s so nice to be the less famous one in a relationship, and more! Check out the Saturday Night Live finale this Saturday, May 16th, at 11:30 p.m. ET/8:30 p.m. PT on NBC and Peacock. Watch “Pop Culture Jeopardy” now streaming on Netflix with new episodes every Monday. https://popculturejeopardy.com/You can still pre-order our book “No Dumb Questions” at https://www.harpercollins.com/pages/nodumbquestionsNew Heights will be Live in Los Angeles at The Orpheum Theatre on June 15th. https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/09006491EE43FB93Watch and listen to new episodes of New Heights every Wednesday during the NFL season and follow us on Social Media for all the best moments from the show: https://lnk.to/newheightshowYou can also listen to new episodes on Wondery, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. ...Download the full podcast here:Wondery: https://wondery.app.link/s9hHTgtXpMbApple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/new-heights/id1643745036Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/show/1y3SUbFMUSESC1N43tBleK?si=LsuQ4a5MRN6wGMcfVcuynwSupport the show: ADOBE ACROBAT: With Adobe Acrobat's AI Assistant, just type what you want to do with your documents and get guided through powerful PDF tools. From deleting pages to signing and protecting documents, you can get more done in way less time. Learn more at https://adobe.com/acrobatMENTOS: Refresh the Everyday with Mentos Chewy Mints. Shop Now!SLEEP NUMBER®: For comfort that shifts with you night after night, year after year. Visit a Sleep Number® store or learn more at https://sleepnumber.comAMERICAN EXPRESS: The refreshed Platinum card is here. Learn more at https://americanexpress.com/withplatinum. Terms applyLIQUID IV: Tear. Pour. Live More. Go to https://www.liquid-iv.com/ and get 20% off your first order with code NEWHEIGHTS at checkout.ALLSTATE: Check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds: https://allstate.com/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How nice is it to be the less famous person in your relationship? Huge, really. It was hard as a stand-up because I would have jokes about either the idea of dating or the idea of marriage or what that is. I can't be like, she's nagging me about this. Everyone's like, shut the fuck. Welcome back to New Heights. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, a Wondry show, as you know, brought to you by Adobe Acrobat. We are your host.

I'm Travis Kelsey. He's my big brother, Jason Kelsey, out of Cleveland Heights, Ohio. Shout out to the Heights. Shout out to the University of Cincinnati and all the bear cats out there. We miss you guys. Subscribe to YouTube or wherever you get your podcast and follow the show on all social media at New Heights Show with one S for fun clips throughout the week. Jason. How you doing you, your underdog over there?

H. H.ha, doing you a good. This guy is laced with apparel right now. Why don't you tell everybody we have coming up? Yeah, we do have the PGA championship here in Philadelphia this year at a hot mix. We are selling some merch there that is centered around PGA Championship, raising money for the foundation. So excited to don some of this gear.

All right, I know. All right, 92% is we got another great episode. We're going to look at what we know so far about the 2026 NFL schedule, as well as answer some of your no-dum questions, which we'd always love to do. Today's guest is SNL's Colin Jost. That's right. Let go. It is in the house.

The Jost is here. The Jost is here. I love it, man. You put it on a t-shirt, man. The Jost is here. The Jost. That sounds good. All right.

Anyways, we're going to start off what we always start off with, a little bit of that new news. New news. New news is brought to you by American Express. Yes, yes, it is. I found out you were in London on the internet. That was fun. London is fun, Jason. Did you do anything stereotypically British while you were there?

For the most part, had some really good food and enjoyed some plays, saw Sadie Sink and I believe Noah Jupe is his name. He was fucking phenomenal as Romeo. Oh, nice. Sadie was phenomenal as Juliet as well. Okay. Have you ever had Indian food in London? I did.

I've had the best Indian food. Well, I'll say second best because Kumar makes the best Indian food. Shout out to Kumar. I would say it was one of the most surprising meals that I've ever had. I went to a spot called Jin Kanah, which was, fucking remarkable. Every dish they brought out, I didn't ask a single question. I just dove in.

The only questions that I had to answer was how hot or how spicy the heat of the spice. Like it's like butter chicken, like standard Indian dishes? Or is this like kind of like another? It was its own rendition. I don't think I had really understood what we were ordering. Okay. I kind of went with what the table was getting. Nice.

You would have never ate curry with me. I don't know if that's true. I've had curry before this. That's right. Kumar? Yes. There we go. What's your favorite kind of curry?

I like chicken masala or chicken matika, I think, is the other one. Atika? Yeah. It was, I believe Kumar's made the matika for me. This one was the chicken butter masala. Damn good. With some garlic gnarly. What level of heat?

So they asked you what level of heat? Yeah. What was the rating system? It was a table consensus. we went more on the mild side, but it was still like Ed Kelsey's sitting over a bucket of chicken wings. It was still hot. Watching Jeopardy. Yeah, I was fucking leaking.

That place sounds awesome. It is phenomenal. And now that I know that there's one in Vegas, everyone in America needs to go try it. I can't wait. I love any food. Anything else you want to talk about on the eating? You were a little bit upset. You feel like we're uncharacteristically been referring to you as a picky eater.

Is this not accurate? No. It's not. It's not accurate at all, but it's fun to play around with because I was, I was at one point, yes. Where, where, and I will give you credit, you opened up the curiosity of eating. It took me to be probably 22-ish, I think it was, maybe 21, and absolutely shit-faced at a sushi spot eating half-priced sushi for the first time. in my life knowing that I had I hadn't really I don't know thought of sushi to be appetizing yeah I wasn't very fond of it at that point raw fish dude gets you excited I got

you raw fish and some of the sauces and the toppings and just like I'm just like why are we doing this just give me the fried rice I'll be good and I was hammered and you told me dude just eat this you're going to love it and I did and then I've loved sushi ever since so she's like I can't go like more than a week without getting sushi now Yeah, that was cloud. It's called Cloud 9 now. What was it called? I forget what it was called back then.

What was it? It was, uh, dancing wasabi. That is what it was. I think so. It became one of my favorite spots. Well, the funny thing about that part is it was always half price. It was, that was their market. No, no, no, no, except for dinner hours.

Dinner hours, it was not. Really? It was like lunch, 11 to 3 and then four to, four to, I think like 10 p.m. was like, like, regular price and then, but from like 11 to 3 half price and then from like 10 to 4 a.m. was another like half price. I guess we were just never, we were always outside of the high, hot. We never went there for dinner. Yeah.

I don't want to do this again. But you, Taylor has gotten you out of your comfort zone more than I ever did. I remember screaming at you to try Benihana's special sauce and you would not try it. And I still, I'll probably, I could try it now, but I'm just like, I'm not going to dump it over my entire Benihana. I love Benihana. Right. I like it just the way it is, just the way they cook it.

I don't think it needs a sauce. I'll do a little spicy mayo, a little yum yum. You have been on record as you are an anti-mail. You do no mayo. Straight mayo. I'm out. But you'll do spicy mayo. Not a lot of it.

I'm not fucking lathering up a sandwich and doing it if I want to like have it like drizzled over some like sushi on it or like over some like. You're in on aoli. It's basically what you're stick. Yeah, I'll have a nice little spread. But if it's like if it's coming out of a burger and like getting on my fucking face, I'm out. I can't do it.

It's too much sauce. I don't need that much sauce. Let me get a burger now. All right. All right, let's keep moving along here. NFL schedule release is coming out Thursday. As of this recording, that's all we know. We know nothing about the schedule.

There's been a few games released. The schedule has leaked so far, per Adam Schefter on Pat McAfee, is as follows. International games. We have one in Melbourne, Australia. The first game in Australia ever. That was going to be Rams and 49ers. So cool. Another Brazil.

game this time between the Cowboys and Ravens. Always a slate of London games. We got commanders. We got Jaguars. We don't know who they're playing, but they're going to be there. Paris, France. Have we played in France yet? I don't know, have we? I don't believe I've seen this. The Saints. Lucky guys. Yeah. Who doesn't want to go to Paris? Madrid? I was going to say, Madrid, the Falcons. I know the, I know the Chiefs were like, I think Spain might be the only one that we were in on. I don't know if I'm even allowed to be saying this? Is that news? I don't know. We look that up real quick.

What do you mean in on? Like you're, you're a, I think that may be one that we like. A candidate to be in? Yeah, that we, because you like put in bids for these games. For sure. Well, and you can kind of, because it takes away a home game, you can actually submit to be one of the like home teams or whatever, if you want, I think. Mexico City 49ers. Munich. We got the lions. Munich's going to love the lions and Dan Campbell. Yeah, I guess the Chiefs, I mean, I guess we have been lobbying for it to play in Spain. And the Falcons are, I believe, are like 18th game. Like we don't play the NFC South, but we, there are extra game next year.

So it could be a little Falcons, Kansas City? Our 17th game. Let's see if Travis is calling it. So you think week nine, Falcons versus Chiefs, you're saying it right now in this podcast. You have no inside information. That's so erroneous. That is so crazy. We're just guessing.

I don't. I'm guessing I know that we play. That's like the only team on here that we play outside of the 49ers. Okay. Mexico City. We played there before. Nice. I don't think we play the Lions.

I think we, yeah, we play the NFC West this year. And then as I said, the Falcons were our only extra game this year. So I think that's our only chance of playing abroad. I mean, Spain, it's pretty nice. I've never been. It's pretty nice. Never been. Looks really nice.

Scene picks. People. Beautiful. Beautiful people. Great wine. Paella. Mm. Bye.

That's about all I know. My friend Alejandro Villanueva is just like sitting there, like yelling at me right now. For not knowing. That's what I know about Spain. Alejandro, we're sorry. I'm, yeah. Comes off a little too fancy. Spain comes off a little fancy to me.

Is that accurate? No, that's very false. That's not accurate. It has its very nice. spots and it is a very elegant feel but fancy it just comes off a little snooty to me no way jason do not just saying that i don't know i don't know if that's true i've never been i just when i think of especially to madrid i'm thinking of like what do you think they speak french um Madrid and uh barcelona are the two big cities that's all i know this conversation is going absolutely nowhere

all right perfect so maybe uh so Travis is basically guaranteeing that the falcons is playing the Chiefs, Week 9. I'm guaranteeing it in hopes that we do because I want to play in Spain. Regular season games that have been confirmed, week one, the Cowboys versus Giants on Sunday night football. There's going to be a Thanksgiving Eve game, so a Wednesday game. They don't know who it's going to be yet, but there will be one. That's probably, I'm assuming, one of the games that they sold the Netflix or something

like that. Christmas Day, another scheduled game on Netflix, Week 18. Saturday games are going to be scheduled. Saturday game will be scheduled on Netflix. This is the topic right now is a lot of these games going. to networks and platforms that viewers have to pay for. You know, the game for a large port of existence was free on basic television. As long as you had the old rabbit ears, you could watch football on Sunday.

But you can still do that on Sundays. But I think it's, I think it's always been cable has been whatever area you're in is the game that you get, which is why when we were growing up, we got Browns games. But then when the Browns left, we got Pittsburgh, Detroit, and Cincinnati games. What's interesting is that still the vast majority of the games you can get with rabbit ears. Like, if you think about it like that, like you can still, as long as you got some old fucking antennae, you can still watch over 80 some percent of the football games. There is a lot of criticism, and I get it because it's changing.

And I don't know, you have to have all of these different platforms now if you want to watch all of it. But previously, before those platforms, you couldn't watch all of it. Before YouTube TV came out with Sunday. I guess Sunday ticket came out on direct TV to start. But even that, you couldn't get unless you had direct TV. Now it's never been easier to watch football games. You want to watch everything. And if you still don't want to pay for it, you still can watch the vast majority of football.

Maybe we'd just go to the Paninis down the street. That way you can fucking watch every football game you could ever ask. You put a Buffalo Wild Wings. You can get it all. Yeah. Do we want to try and predict which Chiefs games will be in prime time? I think that's a good fun game. Oh, okay, yeah.

Let's do it. All right, if I was commissioner, which games would I be making of the Chiefs? How many games you think we would be on prime? This is the problem. Your guy's division is getting better. So previously, most of your guys' primetime games are outside of the division. Right? So like Denver this year, is that a prime time game?

We would always have a prime time in division game. But now, like, the Raiders. Yes. Do you have prime time against the Raiders? On what? 100%. I had four touchdowns. Oh, the Christmas game?

No, again, a Christmas game versus the Broncos. Yeah. The divisional games, I feel like those are all, those are a big focus for these like networks to get these rivalry games. Yeah. Well, you want the divisional games because they mean more for the playoff seedings and especially at the end of the year. They're big. Typically get better football when you play in division. Yeah.

All right. Well, Broncos game to start the year. I bet that that would be a prime time game. Well, it's not to start the year. It's just the first fucking logo. Sorry. Yeah. Broncos, virtually one, if not both those games, will probably be primetime, right?

So in previous years, we've had up to five or six primetime games. That's coming off of the Super Bowl. Yes, exactly. This year, so I'm going to guess three to four. I'm going to guess three high-end four. I still think the Kansas City Chiefs are a draw that the league's banking on. I think so I'm playing modest, though. As long as you got Andy Reed, Patrick Mahomes, Travis Kelsey, like.

I had old Texas gunslinger. What about TV? So let's say four to five. If it's five to six, maybe now it's four to five after a down year, one down year in the past decade. All right? Broncos virtually guaranteed to be one of them is going to be a prime time game, right? Yes. What about non-division games?

Which a Buffalo, I mean, that's for sure going to be a prime time game, right? I don't know. We played them mid-afternoon or like that second wave of games that. Yeah, that four o'clock Yeah. I think we played them and and bangles the same. But both of them could be. I think if we get a home game,

I think Patriots are probably the big one that I think people would want to see. Yeah, let me say this. If I'm the network, which games do I want to see the Chiefs playing on my network in printout? I want to see them playing the Broncos. I want to see them playing the 49ers. I want to see them playing the Bills. I want to see them playing the Rams,

Seahawks, Seahawks, or just because I know there's a lot of bad blood and rivalry as the Bengals, right? Yeah. Those are the six games to me that look the most appetizing if I'm a network. Yeah, I'm with you. I guess you could charge us too. Chargers are really good last year. They tackles got hurt. They're going to be, well, they lost Jesse.

enter. We'll see how they do defensively. With the tackle is healthy, Justin Herbert in there, they're going to be really good. Harbaugh still at the helm. Is that a good list? 100%. I've kind of, I left out the Patriots. I don't know why. I mean, I know they went to the Shrewd bowl. That's still a big one. Yeah, it is. 100%. So is San Fran at home. I think that's all, that's going to be a big one as well. The only reason I think I left to Moss is like the other teams all have like you guys really don't have a lot of well I guess you do from back when Tom was there like recent see there hasn't been like a lot of bad blood between chiefs and patriots yeah whereas with the 49ers obviously you guys just played a shoot bowl not too long ago I think it's not as much on

field but there's still that back and forth with the right with the organizations and the and the fan faces yeah fair enough there's a little bit of that all right if I was a betting man I'd say a Chargers home game. I'll go San Fran and home and then the... Mile high, Denver? Two away games. That's what I was going to say. Denver away and

I'll say Chargers away. Oh, no, it's a Chargers. Seahawks. Seahawks away. Do you already know that those are the... Oh, okay. It's already got him home and away. I didn't even notice that. Good job, Travis. Yeah, that's where I'm going with it. All right. Shout out to the Eagles

Autism Foundation Challenge. They raised over $16 million this year. That's right. Holy smokes. It's every year it just keeps getting bigger and bigger. Shout out to Jeffrey Lurie. The executive director, Ryan Hammond, a close family friend, but also Rye has been killing it.

Every single year, it keeps getting better and better. Jeffrey Lurie has put a lot of resources into this. And so far, they've raised over $56 million over the last eight years. Sheesh. Absolutely wild. Man. Yes. So it's, it's.

It's been highly successful. And on top of that, it's, especially this event, is just an awesome event for the community, right? Everybody comes out. You're exercising, you're talking, you're shaking hands. I mean, it's a very just fun day, especially when the rain holds off, which it did, thankfully. And I bike 10 miles again, Tram. Did a little 10-mile bike ride. Oh, yeah.

No way. No chance. Did it in right around 42 minutes, which I'm pretty happy with it. 42 minutes? Listen, that's not bad pace. That's a decent pace. What's that? I don't want to do the number.

Four point you're going. How fast are you going? Oh, how fast are you going? Yeah, like on average, how fast do you think you're going? Well, you're going four point two, well, you're going, so 10 miles. Uh-huh. You're going four point two. Why am I?

I'm trying to divide it by 10. This is not working. You're not doing it the right way. I'm not doing it the right way? No, you're going to take how long it is and then divide it by, we're going 10 miles in 42 minutes. That's what I'm saying. I don't want to do however long a mile is times 10.

I don't want to and then divide it by it. Well, you're going a mile every 4.2 minutes. Every 4.2. Yeah, every 4.2 minutes. So you're going one mile every 4.2 minutes. That's it. So you extrapolate that to so 4.2, 60. There's 60 divided by right around.

I mean, let's just call it. you're basically 60 divided by 4.2. You're almost going 25 miles an hour. You're going up a little bit over 20. No chance. There is no chance. That's not right. Do you know how fast you would have to be fucking battling?

I'm doing the math up. That's like you need to be a fucking tour to France. Let me do 4.2 with 60. I did 4.2 with 100. That was why it was up. 4.2 divided. So four divided by 60 is what? Four divided by 60 is 15, right?

So you're going and then five divided by 60 is, that's where I'm getting the point two from. No, that's not it. It's like 12. So you're going like six, I was going like 16 points up miles an hour. No chance. What do you mean? That's, but the math, that's something like that. I'll give you maybe 12 miles per hour average.

Well, there's, I mean, I wouldn't have finished with that time if that was the case. Exactly. Oh, you're just, you have a discrepancy on the time finished. Yes. I mean, I, I, I know for a fact it's 42 minutes. Seems a little far-fetched dog. I think they gave some of the contestants little chips in their bags.

Maybe I had a chip my bag. Maybe it was a little faulty chip. Also, we, we bullied, uh, Armason Thomas into switching his number from 304. No, we're not doing this to, but we didn't bully anybody. So he just happened to change his number the same week that we put out a video saying that 34 shouldn't be worn by somebody of his position? I'm pretty sure nobody saw that. I begged to differ.

There's a social media clip of it that would beg to differ. How many people saw that social clip, Brandon? Nobody. Jake. Oh, Mason didn't. Well, I mean, it's very coincidental that he switched it to 51 right after we talked about it. You don't know how fast he switched it. I do.

No, you don't. No, you don't. You're just assuming. There was a practice where he was 34 And then another practice Well, that was the rookie camp Yeah, okay So he's 34 at the rookie camp

Then he became 51 after that When has he been in the building To have 51? You haven't even seen him in 51 Yeah, I have. I've seen him in a Jersey in 51 Where? In a video that they said

They was going viral Can we get some assistance here From people in the rundown? Jesus Christ I'm trying to get Jake I don't have the answer I don't do social How dare you?

I mean we just We straight up just didn't make A social clip of that She just plainly lied. Brandon and I are, like, messaging. Like, what the fuck is he talking about? It's in the full episode and a bunch of people. A bunch of we were shitting on us for not remembering 34.

They were more mad about the Walter Payton thing. Yes. But that was all in the full episode. I did not. Never scored a touchdown on the Super Bowl. What you want me to say? Get him. Go ahead.

Come on. Don't do this to Walter. All right, 51, though. Where is the evidence that he switched to 51? Jake, get back in here. Where is the evidence? I haven't seen anything. I've seen this.

I think the chiefs posted like updated rookie numbers and they had it. And that was it. All right. So, but it's like a graphic and none of those are official technically. Why are we doing this? Because a bunch of people on the internet are claiming that we bullied him into changing his number. And I think it's accurate.

I think there is an accurateness to this statement. No. No. No. There's only one way. Our Mason, we got to get you on the show so you can tell Jason that he didn't get bullied into wearing a different number.

All right. There's a bunch of people on here pretty pissed off that we didn't remember. Walter Payton, aka Sweetness, wore that number, which, yeah, I mean,

major file on our part. We definitely should have. We fucked up that one, but did we go down the list of people who are 34? We were trying to remember who. You knew it was running backs. We did know that. And we were trying to remember who wore 34.

We couldn't do it. We couldn't, for some reason, we didn't think it was a bit. We get hit in the head for a living. For sure. Sometimes it just goes right over our head. Deuce Duce was Deuce, wasn't he?

22. I'm pretty sure. Who else wore 34? Let's check that out. Ooh, 34, 34, 34. I can see a Steelers. Steelers jersey 34? I don't know.

All righty, we got some good ones. Okay, some really good ones. Yeah. All right. Are they all running backs like we thought? They are all running backs. Knew it. At least four of them you should know.

All right, four of them. All right. We already out, Walter. Bo Jackson. Nice. Well done. How did you get Bo Jackson so fast? Because it's fucking Bo Jackson.

Did somebody write that down? How did you just pull out Bo Jackson? Bo knows. It's the fucking one of the best fucking running backs of all time. You didn't say Bo Jackson once and they just listed it like it was a fact. 100% said that. All right, whatever. Go ahead.

34, 34, 34, 34, 34. Wait for it. wait for it was i want to say like martial fall you would be wrong um give me an era give me an era one was from our era growing up watching football i would say the latter half of it like high school and middle school years very iconic running back whose career had ups and downs and whose doesn't um well this one was very down when it was down oh ricky williams rickie williams rickie will Williams, there you go. Legend.

Legend for multiple things. And then the other one is one of the most iconic running backs of an era before that. Oh, no, he was 32. Gosh, 32 has got a fuck ton of them. I was going the white running back from Miami. How far back? He was the same era as Brian Bosworth. Matter of fact, has a legendary highlight.

where Brian Bosworth cannot tackle him. Are we talking about Bo Jackson again? I don't think it was Bo. I thought it was the other guy. He's from the same era basically of Bo, I think. This is so fun. I love this trivia stuff. He also ran a sub-5-second 40 at 50 years old more recently.

Gosh, we were thinking about Eric Dickerson? Who are we thinking of? I think he might be doing politics now, which maybe I shouldn't even mention about. Orsa Walker. Yeah. There you go. Were those clues accurate? Yeah, he was a part of the big trade that evidently led to, no, Emmett Smith.

Emmett Smith. He was the Cowboys. I'm an idiot. He is the one that Brian Brownsworth was trying to tackle and broke the tackle, right? No, that was Boe Jackson. That was a fun name. We should do that more often. It was Boe Jackson.

We just sit here and bonder. I mean, listen, they'll cut it up. It'll look better. Finally, tickets still available for our live show in Los Angeles. Oh, baby. That's right. That's right. You guys are not going to want to miss this one.

We're getting fired up for this one. We're getting fired up. Put things together. I can't wait to shoot Jason right in the face with a T-shirt cannon. And he's never going to see it coming. Guests are starting to come out. And when they do come out, I'm assuming these last few tickets will go quickly. So if you're on the fence, just know that once these guests get announced,

which we are not 100% sure on, so we're not going to announce it right now, but we have some leads. We have some leads. Leads, yeah, we got the guys over there working in shifts. All right. The link in description to buy is down below this video. If you will be in the L.A. area around,

when are we doing this again? Like June 15th? 15th. Yeah, there we go. June 15th. All right. And that does it for new news. Brought to you by American Express. Thank you to our presenting sponsor, Adobe Acrobat.

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And that leads us into No Dumb Questions, which is brought to you by the greatest mattress company ever created. Who's that, Travis? Sleep number. Very good. Reminder, you can pre-order our No Dom questions book right now at Kelsey Clubhouse. Nice. We have a few No-Dum questions.

One is from H-L-S-I-Eiffert. H-L-S-Eiffert. H-L-Syfer. What Pokemon character best represents the Eagles and the Chief? The Eagles and the Chiefs. I'm assuming that's what it means. Yeah. The hashtag Bolbuchar.

I think people just like saying Bolbuchar. I feel like Snorlax best represents myself. As for the Eagles, it's got to be a Pokemon with some attitude, a little bit of grit to it. What's a gritty Pokemon? What is a gritty Pokemon? Like Onyx? I kind of want to look at some Pokemon because I haven't played Pokemon in a while

Definitely have to go with the original Like 151 or whatever Charmander is that a chief? Is that what the chiefs are? I think Charmander would be like a Charzard I think would be a chief for sure Similar kind of color way Oh, there we go

This helps, okay Similar color way But is there a team that is more associated with fire? That's weird that there's no teams Like you have the flames in hockey, right? Mm-hmm There's no like fire teams in the NFL, right? Am I blanking on one?

I don't know. Was Zapidos be a good one? Oh, electric. I mean, yeah, it's got to be a bird, right? So you got Zapidos, you got... Why does it have to be a bird? Well, it's Eagle. Oh, you're talking about you. All right. So we got Zapidos. A little Zapidos right here. One of the ice birds, I think it started with like an A, maybe. There was like an A bird. A bird. I think I'm, I keep coming back to Zapidos. Ooh, we could be one of the bats. What were the bats called? Those things are fucking annoying as shit in the game.

They just, they kept fucking showing up. Nixiriani's famous flower speech, there's that one flying flower. I kind of feel, what's the goat, what's the haunted one? The ghost one that flies around. That's what I feel like, the birds. It's purple, not the right color way, but kind of, it's got some menacingness to it. I got nothing in my, in the cards I've already opened. You're thinking of ghastly?

There's ghastly. There's gingar. Gingar. Zubat, I believe, is the bat. Zubat. Articuno was the A bird you're trying to think of. Articuno. I'm going to go Zapidos.

Zappadoos. That's the bird. Yeah. A little zappy. I think we're a Charzard, man. Charzard. Going full evolution. Petty Mahomes thrown fire.

What is Travis Kelsey? I think we already went through this. I'm like the mime. Oh, yeah. We've already done that bit. If you had to live in one Disney movie forever, which would you choose? and why.

Okay, Kristen, 04. Man, one Disney movie. Could live in it forever. Damn, that's a good fucking question. Oh, how do you just won? Heavyweights? You just want to live at the Heavyweights camp forever? Camp Hope.

Get on that blob? Man. It does look fun. Patch that thing back up. Come on now. Have you ever been on a blob? Never, man. It looks so much.

dreaming about being on a blob since heavy weights came out in the 90s. Well, let's fucking make it happen, Travis. All right, let's fucking do it. Give me on a blob. I'm saying heavy weights, man. That shit was so fucking funny.

I was just got to find out where you got a blob from. All the fat kids when we were growing up, they ended up being the funniest, most enjoyable to be around. It's true. Fat people are just better. You didn't get good until you got fat. I didn't, yeah, nobody liked me until I became fat.

That's such a bright. And as I get skinny, people hate me more and more. What's Jason's? I kind of want to go Alice in Wonderland. Just for, just for Eifert or Seifert. I got a little Bulbussar for you. What you're saying? You're going, which one?

I'm going to go Alice in Wonderland. That shit was wild. Alice in Wonderland or Alice in Wonderland? Alice in Wonderland. I can dig that, I guess. Super trippy. You're right. Kind of scary.

Yeah, but I mean, eventually you kind of get used to it, right? I don't know. Yeah, Alice seemed to it. Probably, if I'm going my favorite one, I'm going, I'm going Aladdin. Just have a jeannie round all day, can do whatever I want. Well, do you only get three. Well, no, you do, but the first wish you do is you wish for more wishes.

And then you set him free, and then he's just your friend. But he still has the power somehow. Is that how it works? Did you just make up your own version of Aladdin? At the end of Aladdin, they, he sets him free. And then I think he still is like a right. and the other Aladdin's. They make like multiple. No way. They made more than one Aladdin. Oh, yeah. I think there's like three. There's at least three of them, I'm pretty sure.

Where the fuck have I been? I have not watched them either, to be honest with you. But there are multiple Aladdin's. Yes, you cannot ask for more wishes, but you can grant him freedom and then he becomes your friend. That's the way you get the genie. You grant him freedom. Then he's your friend, but he still has power, so he still can kind of fuck around. That's the point of him, being free is that he doesn't get put under this spell of only given three wishes and going back in the I know, but for some reason, when they set him free in multiple iterations, he still had powers. And then he was still helping with his powers. Man, I got to watch that again.

That doesn't sound like it's right. Well, it's a good lesson for kids. If you want something, you know, and you ask, you only get like three times for somebody's like, this guy's fucking annoying as shit. But if you are good to them and you give them freedom, they'll help you out and you do something for them, then they'll help you out in perpetuity. All right, which Disney movie are you so out on that you would never even want to live in that movie? Yeah, what's my least favorite Disney movie?

I don't know. Let me look at, let me look up. I'm going to go, I'm going to look for help. I don't know. You go first. Do you think of one? I probably say, it's hard to do. Like, what do we mean when we're living in them?

Are we becoming like a specific character? Sounds like, yeah. Like, you got to live in that world. All right. If we're doing that, then I'm going hunchback in Notre Dame. I don't want to be that. Oh, yeah. Living in a fucking tower and just fucking ringing bells.

And I don't even remember what the positive end of that story was. Well, he got the girl. He didn't get the girl, I don't think. I think he just, like, they were like friends. I don't think he got her. No, she, like, kissed a frog or something and he became cute. No, that's, that's, the other one is beauty and the beast. I feel like that that's the most fucked up story that I feel like there is.

What? Beauty and the Beast? Yeah, the Beast can't become handsome. It feels like the message is like, hey, no matter how bad and ugly this person is, you can change them. Another good one is Shrek. Shrek is a bang. That's a very fun one. That's, I don't believe a Disney movie, but that is a banger.

I think it's a kid's movie. We'll accept it. I don't. That's what, DreamWorks or it's one of the ones that's not Disney associated. I'm pretty sure. Pixar is Disney. I think it's Dreamworks. One of those animated studios is an offshoot.

It's not Disney. I don't, yeah. I have four kids, Travis, just trust me. I think Pixar was once on its own and then it became... You are correct on that, I believe. I don't think it was always a part of Disney, but now it is. All right, that does it for no dumb questions brought to you by Sleep Number. All right, let's get to our convo with Colin Jost.

This conversation is brought to you by Mentos, the Freshemaker. All right, here goes Colin. All right, our guest today is a writer, comedian and fairy boat owner from Harvard University. That's right. He's a two-time Emmy winner, five-time WGA award winner and a New York Times bestselling author and the winner of $5,250 on the college edition of Weekest Link. You know it from his time, his host of Pop Culture Jeopardy or from his almost 400 episodes on SNL. Oh, damn.

As the longest tenured anchor of weekend update, please, 92%ers welcome. Colin Jones! Let's fucking go. There we go, baby. I got to savor the best, that best intro I've ever gotten in my life. Where were you for every time I did stand-up? Come on. Listen, if you ever need a guy, I need an intro.

How many, are you still doing stand-up? Time-out. Let's get to this. Yeah, yeah. I'll still tour a little. I mean, now just with kids, like, less. than I used to, but I'll still probably do maybe 50 shows a year, something like that. Oh, wow.

Hell yeah. That's fucking badass. Yeah, Jason's always wanted to do it. I'm terrified of ever doing it. For people that would ever want to do stand-up, what's your best advice? Get ready to suck. I mean, it's different for you guys. Like, you guys would already have instincts about it that are better.

But when you're starting out, it's just, it's sort of brutal for a while. because even things you're like, oh, that's good. You get out there and the rhythms off or something. But, you know, some people are just naturally funny. And so you'd get away, you would already have a head start. There's hope, Jason. Are there a lot of Harvard grads in stand? Like, obviously I know Conan, but are there, is there like a pipeline of Harvard to comedian?

There are like, there was a guy, Dan Mintz, who was really funny, who was, who did stand up when I was there. He still does stand-up. He's a voice on Bob's Burgers, and he's been. He does a bunch of his. B.J. Novak, who was in the office, he did stand-up around that time, too. I think there's more younger people that do it now that are there. But it wasn't a huge thing. It wasn't like, there wasn't a lot of performers.

Like Conan came from there. He did, but I don't think he ever really did stand-up. I think he more did- like sketch stuff and then became and then did, you know, tonight show. So you didn't go to Harvard to do stand-up? It didn't help? They begged me not to then. Certain image we'd like to uphold at this institution.

I went there weirdly to do economics and then quickly abandoned that pursuit. There was someone at school with me who had written a book called Homeless to Harvard about their journey to Harvard. And I feel like now I have to write a book called Harvard to ferry. I'm like trying to go the opposite way, starting economics end up in ferry. There we go. Perfect. Well, speaking of sketch comedy, we do have the SNL final finale coming up this weekend. Pretty awesome one. Will Farrell and Paul McCartney. Come on, man. It's hard to beat that. That's not. It's so good. People are like, is this the last episode ever? Where do we go from here? I know. We had Will on here, and we talked about his time on SNL and just comedian in general.

But one of the things he said that I still take with me is just full said. He's like, if you want to do and you want to be a great comedian or really and it's probably works for anything in life but you commit hard where do you fall in line with that advice like is that what you've kind of feel like is giving you as much success in s&l as well yes definitely there was there was no other plan there was no like plan B i feel like it was either going to work out or i was just not going to do anything but he will is will the other thing about will it's so great is he always keeps a little bit of an element of surprise which is so nice on a a live show.

It's insane, man. He would come in with like a different kind of costume, an element you did, like just adds an ascot or whatever, like something that you didn't expect. And when he enters the scene, even the people in the scene are like, all right, let's quit it. And just a fun, he has a genuine level of fun that he brings. Like, he would come, when he was hosting, and he used to do this when he was in the cast, he just would come into the writer's room and he would wear like a scarf and glasses.

and he would say he was a writer that they brought in from LA for the week and he would just sit there and be listening and he'd be like, hmm, yeah, maybe that one line, maybe you flip it. I could see if you maybe just flip it. And then he'd like order lunch, immediately long, elaborate lunch order. Just like a guy that likes doing bits is the best energy.

Oh my gosh, it's fucking, it's so impressive, man. I can't say in a bit to save my fucking life, man. And this dude just does it just every minute of the day, it feels like. When you first jumped into Weekend Update, the first one that you ever did, were you terrified? Oh, my God. The problem was, it was even weirder because I had been there as a writer. Like, I had just become head writer.

Like, I felt like I was doing well as a writer. And I'd been doing stand-up, but I was really doing a ton of S&L writing. And so at first, I worried like I was going to be so bad that I would lose both jobs. They'd be like, you're so bad on camera. We're also taking away your pen. You're not even letting you write anymore. And I was so nervous. Like, I remember just like drinking bourbon before I went on to calm my nerves.

Stay loose. And just the adrenaline immediately just burned it off. And it was weird because it was also like I was doing it in front of all my peers who I had been working with. the whole crew who I've been working with. But then it's suddenly you're in a totally different role. And you're really self-conscious about it. Yeah, I can only imagine. Now that you've been doing it for a while, is there one?

What's harder, writing or performing? I think writing is harder. Like, it's hard to do. I don't know. I still find writing is hard. Like it never gets really easy. But performing is just a whole other skill that, that you don't know if you have until you're doing it.

Like it's really hard to work at. You can get better for sure. Like you can work at acting. You can work. Like it's a skill you can develop. But you also kind of need some spark or something that you don't. I don't know what it is. But you need something and it's something that comes across on camera that is a little

less, I don't know, definable. I don't know. Oh, yeah. Especially when it's fucking live. Yeah. I mean, I think whatever. else I do in life will feel easier. Even if I do a movie, I'm like, oh, I can get another take.

It's so liberating. Like, we never get a second shot. And as a writer, too, like, you'll write something. And if there's a, something goes wrong or someone flubs a line or something, there's a technical cue, you never get to do it again. Yeah. Right. And so when something actually goes the way you imagine it, you feel like it's a miracle.

Like you pulled it off and, you know, you're, you're so grateful that it came together. So as you know, I'm sure there's, you know, there's, and I'm sure you know, too, there's things you think are going to work and then they don't. They, they, you know, and then there's things you're like, I don't know, maybe I'll try it. And then maybe it was something that surprised you when you hosted that work, you know. Oh, not even just on SNL. There's stuff in the football world that I'm like, this will guarantee happen. Coach, can we just put this in? And then we try it and practice. And there's like, it gets gloved and nothing. And I'm just sitting there like, coach is right. He knows what he's doing. He told me that wouldn't work. That's good. I'm glad to know that happens there too. Yeah. You've been working on the show for 20 plus fucking years now.

There's still like some starstruck moments or any host or musical guests that are just like, holy shit. Yeah. I mean, still. I mean, I felt Paul McCartney is someone that's still, even though he's been come around a bunch. And it's just the coolest guy ever. Just the smooth cat. He's like a. Like a beam of light.

Super. Yeah, super. Like just, I remember this last year, he was there for the 50th anniversary. You know, he played, which was one of the most incredible ways you could end an episode of television is to have him play the last three songs from Avee Road. I mean, that was just seeing everyone from the original cast from people who were there, like watching in tears. What a great moment.

And there was, he was doing rehearsal. And so I told my parents who were a huge fan. They were like, I was like, come down. You got to see this rehearsal. I'll sneak you in. And he's like, I see him. He's up there playing. And my dad calls and he's like, we're getting in a cab now.

And I was like, Dad, John. What are you doing? And just they walk in comically like right after he had finished rehearsing. And I was like, guys. And Paul, like he's, he can send, this is how great a human he is. He sent, I think he could almost sense that they had just missed it. And so after he finished playing, he like came up and was like, hey, how's it going? I'm Paul.

I still came home. He spent like five minutes talking to my parents. And it just immediately made the whole situation, like even better than if they had seen him. Like he just has those instincts, you know? Hell yeah. Absolutely. It was great to seeing him try to get through crowded into the building with, and he's just wearing a hood. And someone's like, sir, you can't just walk in here.

And he just like, puts the hood up below. He's like, right this way. you could do whatever you need, sir. Yeah. Are you and Michael Shea going to do a joke swap at the finale? Please. Oh, my God. That's two weeks away.

So it's like just further this thing from a we haven't planned. I couldn't tell you anything yet about it. But I mean, we'll see. I'm sure we'll try to brainstorm some version of it. See if we can come up with something that would feel satisfying. It's hard to keep. And also, I don't know if you noticed that a little bit of a structural disadvantage. You know?

It's harder for me to figure out what to do. Oh, God. It was the time I feel like I got him the most nervous because he's such a Kendrick Lamar fan. When I started getting him, weighing in on the feud, like talking directly to Kendrick, I could tell he was really, really genuinely worried about what I was going to make

and say. Now I got him. Now you know what it's like for me every time. Yeah. But I'm open up ideas. Have you guys got any pitches? Yeah. We are the last.

Like you said, writing. Exactly. I can't even put a sentence together, actually. I am curious, though, for that, like, for that bit, that's been one of the most, like, longest tenured bits at this point, right, within SNL. Yeah, I guess that's just. Yeah. Like, what is the process for that?

Do you guys have any idea going into it? I know they do the rehearsal, like, right before the show. Like, how much of a wild card are you truly, like, on the hook of, like, what is about, what am I about to get? Well, so we have people ask about it. Well, it's, you know, we have a dress rehearsal. But at the dress rehearsal, we do totally different jokes. Yes.

And sometimes they're more tame, sort of to lull the other person into a false sense of security. You know, like, this one's actually, this is not that bad. You're that easy night here. And then sometimes they're actually a little harsher because you can, you know, you can make him say one thing that's not going to, not going to air. There's really been ones where I've, where I said, he made me say a joke and the host that week came up to me after and was like, are you okay? Touch my shoulder. It was like, he can't do that to you, like that kind of vibe.

It evolved because it started where we just wanted another chance to do jokes that the sensor had stopped. So we originally did it as just jokes that we weren't able to tell early in the year. and then I perhaps foolishly suggested, wouldn't it be fun if we didn't know what was coming? And so it was like, oh, that made sense to give it to each other. And I remember Che being like, okay. All right.

Sure. And I was like, yeah, I really brought it on myself. Well, thank you for doing it because it's one of the entire fans of S&L's favorite bits, man. It is thrilling to do, even though it is also terrifying. and my family every year is very worried for me. I remember my mom saying like a Rosa Parks graphic came up and my mom was like, I was just, I thought our whole family was going to end.

We're going to have to just shut down the family. Are we using the word bit correctly? This is another thing. There's like, yeah, like, okay. I think so. I would say that too. I feel like there's a little bit interchangeable. I would say of this I would describe that as a bit.

Nice. Okay. Yes. Yeah. I'm going to fuck that out. Yes. Boom. For Travis.

Fuck you, Jason. Thank you to our partner Mentos. Some people are creatures of habit. Ordering from the same restaurant, watching the same show, doing the same routine day in, day out. And look, no judgment, but that's not for everybody. Some of us crave a little surprise, a little what's next in our day. And if that's you, you're going to love the Mentos Discovery Roll. Ooh, a little mystery.

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All right, 92%. We've partnered with Liquid Ivy for an exclusive taste test of their newest sugar-free flavor, Ringpop. Our interns have graciously volunteered to try it out. Jake and Brandon, can you do the honors? Absolutely, I can. I got my water and my little mixing right here. We got the Liquid Ivy.

Oh, yes, Ringpop flavor. Oh, let's try it. Look at Jake's fancy cup. It's a nice cup. Only the best for liquid IV. It's actually so good. That is dangerous. It sounds very good.

Yeah. Honestly, when you see the flavor's ring pop and you go, what does that taste like? And you taste, you go, no, that's a ripop. It really does taste like a ring pop cherry. It brings me back to like being at the town pool as a kid. Yeah. Hammer and ring pop. Brandon, you needed some electrolytes, huh?

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for weekend update is it harder now with how much the news cycle changes like you guys start writing this stuff usually like that week earlier in it yes i mean it all gets thrown out now like you if you have you can have a joke you love on monday and it's completely irrelevant but so we we do most of it now on friday and saturday like friday and saturday now is just wall to wall because it's all, it all different now. It's like, that's completely changed since when I started. And even the cold opens, like we used to have cold opens that we wrote for the table read on Wednesday and they would still make sense as the top story.

Now, like the top story is never the same between Wednesday and Saturday. So most of the cold opens now we write on Friday and Saturday, too. The times is changing. They are. That's fucking awesome, though, man. Before we go anywhere, though, we got to take a peek at this, uh, this, 2005 card we have here. A little NBC Universal, baby.

Oh, my God. Yeah. Wow. Oh. I feel like the sideburns. The siberns are so long, they may go underneath and connect under my chin. I was good to say, you do a little Abe Lincoln. You just had to just straight along the change.

It also looks, I'm wearing like a, like a such a flesh colored t-shirt that it almost looks like I came shirtless to work. Hey, your Bert Kreisier here. A young Bert Kreis. This is still. This is still my ID. So that photo still comes up for the security guard. And you can tell every time.

He's like, wait a second. This is still your photo? Can you brush that hair forward real quick for me? This is still what I, yeah. I'm kidding. That's hilarious. It doesn't go forward anymore. That's what the guy says.

Thank you for show me. Yep, you're clear. You're good. It was just a different place in my life, you know. The burns, man. What was the hiring process besides this, wonderful photo. I just walked up with that badge.

And I was like, people don't know. It's just a sign up sheet. That's it. Yeah. The process was I wrote, I wrote a packet of like six sketches. And people, we still, you know, when I was head writer, like, we still read hundreds of submission packets every summer. Oh, wow. And everyone goes through.

So it really people's stuff gets read who submit to the show. and we still hire people from just from packs. If something makes you laugh, it's kind of, it's a rare thing. Like if you read a packet and you still, and something really genuinely just makes you laugh reading it, that's a really good sign because that's just hard, rare to do. Sure.

But I submitted a packet one year before I got hired at the wrong time. Like I didn't even know when to send it in. And so I sent it in and then clearly no one ever read it because it was not a time they were looking for writers. And then I submitted in the summer, and Tina was one of the headwriters there. Harper Steel was another head writer there. And they just read, they liked some of the sketches that I wrote. I was very, very lucky.

And so I came in an interview with them, and then I had to interview with Lorne the same day, which luckily I didn't even know I was going to have to do. Why do you say luckily? Well, because I would have been so nervous. I had less time to worry about it because they were like, And we're just going to have you go interview with Lorne. I was like, oh, sure, cool. Got it.

Yeah, let's do it. Because you're so nervous. I mean, actually, Will Ferrell, I don't know this story, but he went to interview with Lorne, and he, as a bit, like, came with a huge suitcase full of money. And so he was like, I'm going to go in and be like, Lorne, if you're on the fence, maybe this would change your mind. And open the suitcase. And then he said, he went into me with Lauren.

carries in the suitcase in the Lawrence office and is instantly so nervous that he never does the bit. And so then they have the whole interview and then he's just like, and it seems like he's like going to get the job. So he's like, it was great to meet you, Mr. Michaels. Thank you. He just stands up with a suitcase and leave. So it's like it was in a way even crazier that he thought it brought a suitcase to a comedy interview and never did the bit. So legendary, man. interview with Lorne and then one of the producers was like, stick around for a while. And I was like, okay, so I didn't know what that meant. And then he just put me in a writer's office to just sit there

and wait to see. I didn't know for what. I didn't know what it meant. And so I'm in this office for like an hour or two hanging out, just like alone. And then the phone rings in the office, like this random writer's office. And so instinctively, I was like, I guess I'll answer it. Why? I mean, In his office, I just pick up the phone and one of the producers who's there also in the building tells me that I got hired. Oh, that's so happy. That's so amazing. I was sitting. He called me from another office and I just answered a random telephone.

It was told I got hired. That's pretty cool. Yeah, Tina Fey, Philadelphia Legend, what was it like being in their first year going into a room like that? Oh, very intimidating. I mean, and she was such a, she had written so many sketches that I love. I didn't even know until I was there. Like, she had written all these. Like, there was one where Christopher Walken is the census taker.

I don't know if you ever seen that one back in the day. It's like him and Tim Meadows. You got to watch it. It's just like pure random nonsense, basically. And which is the kind of sketch I love, you know, I love. I love. And it's so well, every line is a joke in it. Christopher Walkin, who's one of the best, it was so good in it.

But she had written so many great sketches, too. So it's a very intimidating head writer. to submit sketches to it. And there was a lot happening that year because a lot of people, like I started with Kristen Wigg, Jason Siddakis, Bill Hater, and Andy Samburg. We were all new together, which is just an insane, truly one of the best groups of people to come in to the show. And that was it. They were the four actors that came in.

and then two writers who worked with Andy with the Lonely Island who came in and Brian Tucker who had worked at Chappelle's show. And that was our group that we started with. And there were all these cast members that were kind of in their last year. So it was a big transition year. It was the year like Tina was leaving, Maya, Rudolph was leaving, Rachel Dratch was leaving. A lot of people who had been there. And Tina was starting 30 Rock. So that was like that process was happening.

That year we saw all that. like the show starting up. And so we, as a group, like all these new people, we started figuring out getting our stuff on onto the show, like how we could sneak in. And there were some incredible, I was looking back at the episodes from that year, and there's just crazy pairings.

Like Steve Martin and Prince was a show. Oh, shit. My first episode was Steve Carell and Kanye, which was just a walk-in, Kanye first episode. Tom Hanks and the Red Hot Chili Peppers was a show. which was pretty awesome. Love it, love it. Jack Black and Neil Young, pretty crazy.

And then it was like all these great shows. And then the last episode I just saw the season finale was Kevin Spacey and Nelly Furtado. It's like, I was like, I'm sure Nellifertato is so happy to have that ticket for him in their house now. They're like, what you do us and L with? This guy, Kevin. So fun. What a great, what a great season. But it was really, it was pretty cool.

so many of those people were like my idols. Was it always SNL for you? Was that always like the gig once you dropped out of economics? Yeah. Everyone, if you leave economics, you typically go to. We have a ton of just former bankers. We, I would have worked anywhere. I mean, I would have worked, you know, I applied everywhere.

I applied and just didn't, you know, I applied to Letterman. I applied to, you know, Conan. I applied to the Daily Show. I wrote a spec script of arrested development when it was on. I wrote a spec script of scrubs, like shows that were on at that time and just didn't get traction anywhere. But I would have, of course, loved to work at SNL. I think I didn't let myself believe I could.

And so then when it worked out, it was like, you know. Holy shit. It was incredible. And it was luckily because I did drop out of, any sort of normal job. I think it made it easier on my parents that it was a show they had heard of instead of, you know, going somewhere

where they would be still very worried about me. So it was good. Well, I got to know. You've mentioned all of these ridiculous guests, hosts, musical artists. What was it like having Travis Kelsey, honest take on Travis Kelsey as a host? Fantastic.

I hope you know. I hope you know. First of all, I thought it was a great show. Dude, I mean, I just blast. I don't know how it compared to others, man. But the entire week, I was like over the fucking moon, dude. It was insane.

No, you had a perfect approach to it. Obviously, you know the show. You and you threw yourself into it. Absolutely committed everything. And, I mean, I hope you come and do it again. It would be fantastic. What do you? Are there any, is there any coaching maybe for his next?

Oh, yeah. Coach me up. Coach me up. What is your notes? Cose me. I've got no. I'll look through the game. I'll go through the phone.

I'll go through the phone room. I'll walk a couple things out. Late entrance here. World dead weight. Inflections wrong here. I'll get in there. I'll go, I'll be a whole dissection. Went from Australia to British halfway through.

I'm sure the notes would all be for our own, on our own side. Like, we should have written a better joke here. There was some standard. out too. Having the meal in the American Girl store, that would be really good. Oh, my fucking God. I still go back and watch that. I mean, it's absolutely hilarious. I had so much fun doing that one. I was like,

oh, be a creep. You were a little too good at it, to be honest with you. It was a little I think it was. You had spent like months at that just doing research. It was a method approach. I was getting Porterhouses the entire time there. And then you spent like months after

you hosted there too. And you were kind of really trying to get people to know I was trying to, yeah, get my, oh, he's really committed to this. You still get like 10% off food there, right? Like, if you anytime, like a lifetime. Only the stakes, the really high price stakes. And they still card me, Colin, they still card me every time I go in.

And I don't understand. I'm not ordering alcohol or anything that I'm in of age. Nikki Glazer hosted, and I did a sketch with her that was like, American Girl, they make a larger version of, of the American Girl dolls? And then instantly, it's just like guys coming in. Like, yeah, I'll get one of us. That's a banger.

How did it compare for you, like, what you thought going in? Because it's such a blur. Once you're going, it must be such a blur of that day. That's the thing. I went into it, like, with zero expectations. I was like, the one thing I wanted to do was, like, just be a teammate, let everybody, like, tell you what, like, what to do. to do it, where to go. Don't try and put your twists on any of the, like, writing or anything

like that. Just go in there and like be present and enjoy the fucking ride. And I think it was the coolest experience I've ever had in my life. Like it was S&L. I got a, I got a text from Peyton Manning giving me advice on. He was like, dude, just buckle up and, and enjoy the roller coaster and just dive in, just be all in on everything that they're telling you. And that was the best thing I could have heard at that moment because I was going into it blind, not knowing how everybody was so goddamn funny on SNL. But then I quickly realized after jumping into all the little writing rooms and here and everybody trying not necessarily pitch me apart, but get me to understand a part just how

talented everyone is up there and how much of like a family and unity it is up there. So I just went in, I just went in with, you know, zero expectations and hoping that I didn't fuck it up on Saturday. No, no, not at all. I mean, it's the thing you realize, too, is, you know, the writers are also nervous and also trying to figure it out. Like, you know, they don't necessarily know what's going to work. And they're trying to figure out what's fun for you to do or what would be a good look for

you in a scene or world for a scene, you know. Which is where if I did it again, I would actually be able to tell them, oh, I can do this kind of accent. I can do this. Like, I just went in there and somebody asked me, are, do you have any accents you can do? I'm just like, fuck.

We don't want to take up too much more your time. We got a last section. We got to ask. I have no friends. No way to go. I have nothing. Never mind then. We'll be here.

I don't want to see my kids. I know. Whatever you. You are starting season two of pop culture Jeopardy. Oh, yeah. On Netflix. That's right. You are an economic Harvard.

Well, I guess she didn't graduate with the economy, but economics. I graduated in pop culture. There we go. Would you be better at regular Jeopardy or Pop Culture Jeopardy? Oh, 100% regular. Really? Yes.

And I'm not, I don't think I'd be very good at Jeopardy. Like, I'm not really a good trivia. The thing I realized I said, it almost is like a Yogi Berra phrase. I literally told someone, I'm good at trivia if I know the answer. Like, uh-huh, right. There's certain things I know well, but I don't have a, there's a huge blind spots in regular, in anything. But Jeopardy, the level of knowledge and the breadth of knowledge that people have as Jeopardy contestants is so impressive. It's crazy.

Pop culture is even, is even crazier to me because it changes so much and there's so many errors of pop culture. And this is definitely weighted more recent. you know, which is sad because when there's the category about the 90s, that's the one I feel like I can get. I'm on this, yeah. Yeah. And then, but, and weirdly, sometimes that's a category where no one will get an answer now. And that just makes me feel very sad and old. As two guys who are also of the plus one fraternity and have this same experience, how nice is it to be the less famous person in your relationship?

Huge relief. Really? It's really funny because I feel like it's, I think I'm probably almost approached more because she's less approachable. So, you know what I mean? Because I'm on TV. I have like a lesser. People are just like, I'm in their living room. So they're just like, hey, what's up, man?

How's it going? She's actually almost like so famous that they don't, they don't believe it a lot of times too. Like, we've been traveling and we've been standing at the passport check and the person is looking at her passport. and he'll be like, has anyone ever told you you look like Scarlethous or Hansen? Genuinely. Like genuinely asking and not realize, even though he's looking at her because he's like, it would be weirder if it was her and just give it back to her and not think it's a really kind of awesome.

That's amazing. Shout to the plus ones out there. The other thing I've noticed too is that if we're ever ordering food, you know the order is not going to be right. Because if we're like, go to like, go buy a sandwich or something. order and the person will recognize her and then doesn't write down anything about the sandwich. You're completely

distracted. All the ingredients are wrong. We'll open the sandwich and nothing is what did you say? Yeah, it's really funny. It's like bread and just like a pickle. Yeah, it's good. It's good. I feel like it's we can, you know, commiserate. Yeah, that's right.

I'm on the team. It's a hard. I'm here for it. You also, it was hard as a stand as a as a stand-up because I would have jokes about either the idea of dating or the idea of marriage or what that is. I just can't. There's nothing that will. I can't be like,

she's nagging me about this. Everyone's like, shut the fuck. It's really, it eliminated that part of stand-up. All right. Well, can you please tell us our next question.

Can you please tell us about the time Jimmy Buffett saved your life? Oh, my God. with pleasure. It was, it was really pretty, I mean, RIP, what a great dude. Like, really, I was randomly seated next to him at a dinner. Uh, in at, like, it was, I was there with, uh, I was dating a girl at the time who was there with friends who were working at Vice magazine. And, um, and I was just randomly seated next to him. And I had never met him before. And I didn't know was him. And so, it was like over the course of dinner and he was like talk I was I surf and he heard that and he was like oh he just wanted to talk about surfing because he loves surfing and only after a while I

sort of noticed little subtle hints that it might be Jimmy Buffett like he would say something like whenever I open a new Margaritaville I like to go and find somewhere to surf near where the Margaritiaville is. And I was like, hmm, this might be Tim Buffett. Interesting. And then he was really gracious and, you know, knew I like to surf. So he's like, I'm going to go surf tomorrow morning out in like, I think it's like the west coast of St. Bart's like a more remote area.

Why don't you come surf? And I was like, oh my God, of course. This is fantastic. So I went to meet him and I got there and I kind of immediately thought, realized that maybe it was a thing where he said like, oh, you should come by sometime, but did it mean, but didn't mean it? Like, mean it? You know what I mean? And he's like, yeah, come hang. And I was like, great, I will. I'll be there tomorrow morning. And suddenly I was like, am I psychotic that I just took him up on this? And it was just like him and his family. And then

there was like a surf instructor that it was out there that was just kind of helping them. And he lent me a board and we went out. And I kind of was hanging back. And they all, caught waves like in a row at this and again no one was there it was kind of amazing like no one was at this break it was like a nice sort of five six foot wave rolling in and and then I finally was like I'm going to catch a wave and I caught a wave and I remember when we were going out swimming out Jimmy was like be careful when you get into shaller water because there's a lot of rocks like don't don't ride it all the way in yeah and again because it's him and I'm talking to him and I'm excited I didn't pay any of the advice at all.

Completely ignored it. And then rode the wave all the way in and went to turn around on my board and paddle back. And I, like, couldn't paddle forward. And I was like, I don't know, I didn't know why. And then I realized that my leash had been stuck under one of the famous rocks he had told me about. And I couldn't get out. And the waves were coming. And so I couldn't get, reach down and get it.

I was like trying to tug it out, which probably was making it worse. and I was stuck and he was like, are you okay in there? And again, I was like trying to play it. Cool. So I was like, oh, yeah,

I'm great. I love all this water. I'm swallowing. I'm doing great. And then I started getting like kind of nervous because I couldn't get loose of this rock. And so he sort of sensed it and had, or his,

you're the instructor there had like a knife. A knife. Yeah. Then he was just probably for this reason, like if someone got like the way you would in scuba diving, like have a little night. And so he swam and cut my, leash off and got me out.

And then literally he was like, I think that down the beach might be more your speed. Like that might you might like it over there. And so and then I was and then of course I was like, oh no, I destroyed Jimmy's leash. And so like the next morning I went to, I found like a surf shop in St. Bart's where a leash costs like $2,000. Dirk mechanic. That's a same barred's leash.

Yeah, yeah. And then bought it and brought it all the way back to, because I was. I was like, I can't leave him with this broken leash. And, of course, like, he wasn't there. And the guy who was there was like, you did not need to do this. He has like, a hundred lead. It's fine. But I was like, I should do this.

And then, and that's the last time that I got to serve with him. RIP, the legend, man. Very cool story. Incredible. God damn, that's good. Lastly, what's your welcome to SNL moment? Like, what do you mean? Like, when I was welcome there, like, or if I welcome someone there.

It's more like, we ask this to, like, NFL players, anybody in their field? Like, when was it where you were like, oh, my God, I'm doing it. I'm doing this. Like, I'm at S&L. Welcome to Hollywood moment. Welcome to the NFL moment. Oh, yeah, that. Yeah.

Yeah. One of them was, I was like getting, like I was doing pretty well as a writer. And I remember Lorne saying, can you come into my office? and I went into his office and Mick Jagger was there. And he was like, Mick Jagger is doing a show in Indianapolis tomorrow. Do you have any jokes he could do? Oh, no.

Oh, man. What? Yeah. And I was like, what? You know, I'm thinking like, of all things Mick Jagger needs, it's not jokes. He doesn't need it. He could say anything.

and people are going to scream. And on the spot, I was like just trying to think about what, I was like, TZ want to joke about Indianapolis? Like, what kind of jokes? I was like, what jokes do you do normally, Mr. Jackson? That was definitely a, I don't even know what I said. I feel like I was, because I also didn't even know he was going to be in there. That's crazy.

That was like, that was a real welcome to Hollywood moment. And then, God, I'm trying to think of like what another, what another one is for me. Like, there's just like, I don't know, through the, I think the one of the ones still, even more recent, which was just like a keeping, it's like keeping it in mind as I go through it. Because I still have ones that are, of course. Shocking when I put them in context. And I remember doing opening for Chappelle at Radio City, which was like a couple of dreams come true. That's like, that was really awesome. And then I was going to L.A.

And he was going to L.A. And he was like, come do a, let's go to a Lakers game. And so, like, we went to a Lakers game together. And we're in like the player, they just immediately, wherever he goes. They're like, wherever you want to go in the stadium, you're welcome. So like, we're in the players tunnel. and he's like, you want to smoke?

And I'm like, sure, I never, I never smoke, but I was like, I didn't know, I'd want to smoke a city. I'm sure, I'm like, sure, no problem. I would love that. I'll look totally natural doing it. So we're smoking, we're smoking in, you know, in Lakers Arena there and the staple center.

Yeah. And then someone's like, do you want to meet Kareem, Abdul-Jabbar? He's just over here. He's like there's a little lounge. It's like cream. It's just like a couple people hanging out like Creamy Madhul Jabar. That was a moment where I just was thinking this is a great, like what a wonderful combination of so fucking folks to be in a little lounge.

Yeah, that's a pinch me moment. That sounds like a fucking dream. Yeah. And it's very nice when you get to work with people that you that you love, especially, you know, it's an athlete. yourself included, like LeBron coming to host, Peyton coming to host, like that those are really, those are moments that you kind of can't believe that you get to do that.

Because you writing for people that you love like Larry David or Julie Lerifus or people who are comedians is already, but then when it's an athlete, it's like a double thing of you never thought you'd get to do it. Or a musician, like writing something for Nikki Minaj or something that's a totally, totally a thing, you know, different, different out of your world. It's the best. It's so cool. That's why the job is just who else gets to work with those combinations of people over those years.

It's pretty amazing. I feel very lucky. Well, you should, dude. I appreciate the stories, man. Thank you for the time. The stories, all the above. Thank you for all the fucking laughs on SNL. The season 51 finale airs May 16th at 1130 Eastern, as everyone knows.

and we cannot fucking wait to watch it on NBC Peacock with host Will Ferrell and musical guest, Paul Sir, Paul McCartney. Enjoy it, dude. You can't wait to fucking see it, man. Pleasure. Thank you guys for having me out. I appreciate it. Oh, and also, starting May 11th, new episodes of Pop Culture Jeopardy

will premiere on Netflix. So every weekend. Oh, yeah. Enjoy it, ladies and gentlemen. I will say if you're a Jeopardy fan or a pop culture fan, there are some episodes that are, incredible television. Like the game play

will blow your mind. Like there's semifinals and the finals were like shockingly dramatic and cool. So, fuck it. It has nothing to do with me.

It has nothing to do with me. The actual people playing the games are. Like your mind's going to be blown if you're a Jeopardy fan. That's pretty awesome. That's nice. Well, fuck it, dog. Appreciate you, dude.

All righty, thank you to Colin Jost and that conversation was brought to you by Mentos. And that is the end of this episode. That's right. Thank you to Colin Jones. Remindered, there are still tickets available for our New Heights live show in L.A. on June 15th.

Check out the link in the description. And make sure you're subscribed to the New Heights channel on YouTube and wherever you get your podcast. Once again, New Heights is a Wondry show brought to you by Adobe Acrobat. You're going to want to download it if you want to be organized and make life easier in your business world. Follow the show on all social media at New Heights Show with what asks for fun clips throughout the week.

and thank you to our new Heights production team. We love you. And to the 92% as we love you too. We'll see you guys next week. Ooh, we're going to get some NFL scheduling next week. We'll see how accurate we were in the Chiefs. I might not read, but I enjoy the arts. Okay?

I'm not doing this anymore, okay? Doing what? This whole Travis only likes chicken fingers, all right? I'm not doing this anymore. I'm fucking... Who said that was the case? You and you did. No, I both used to.

No, we never said that. You didn't like food before you started dating with Taylor. That's all I'm saying. It's bogus. And you flew out of the country to prove a point. You flew out of the country to prove me wrong personally. And I say, you're welcome. I got you out there.

I'm happy for you. Because I don't eat mayonnaise out of a jar and because I don't fucking eat at a restaurant that I just blindly go to and don't really enjoy goat. Windly go to. Says the guy who made the reservation. I blindly went there. You took me there.

It was a, it was. Goat is in the title. Goat is in the title. I was looking at restaurants around the area and that happened to have a good star rating. But go is a goat is like third word in that title. You knew it was coming. Yeah. So is lady.

Does that mean I'm going to fucking eat a lady? No. I don't know. Do we refocus on shame? Shakespeare, I got to admit, I've never, I've seen, like, Romeo or Romeo, where art that road? Like, I've seen like bits. I don't think I've ever seen the full, Romeo and Juliet.

Yeah, I have no idea. I know the premise of it, essentially, is like, how we got to get you out of the house. I think we had to read Midsummer Nights of Dream in high school. That's the only, oh, yeah. That's your only Shakespeare play that I've really actually read, I think. We got to get, we got to get culture. We did, we did Hamlet. But I don't remember.

I don't remember much. Hamlet's to be or not to be. It's like the Prince of Denmark. I played in high school. I know there's war, right? So from what other people tell me, Hamlet is like the, if you're a dude,

you're going to be into Hamlet is what I've been told. Hamlet are probably, I don't know how accurate that is. That's probably very dude heavy too. I actually saw much ado about that. That's a movie. Another play I did in high school. I think I've seen much to do about nothing as well.

Big Shakespeare guy high school. Don't laugh me, Travis. Would you play, Brandon? What was your character? I was Benedict. That's the lead, by the way. Oh! Benedict Arnold.

Starting quarterback! There we go. Your boy right here. Also, played Hamlet. Come at me, Travis. Clearly went to a very small school with not a lot of stars. You son of a bitch, Kelsey!