New Heights with Jason and Travis Kelce - Travis’ Wild Lateral, Jason’s KC Tailgate and the Next Head Coach of The Jets | Ep 104
Episode Date: October 9, 202492%ers, we are back with another episode of New Heights! In this episode, we are coming to you live (pre-recorded) from Kansas City! We’ve got a shout out to Mama Kelce for making the ...cover of Glamour, the New Heights Film Club poll results, and Jason continues to try and guess what is going to happen on Grotesquerie. Jason recaps his weekend Outta the House in Kansas City at the Kelce Car Jam, signing someone’s leg on Monday Night Countdown, and his time tailgating with the Kingdom before Monday Night Football. Travis also settles the debate on his primetime lateral, explains why the Chiefs offense clicked so well against The Saints, and shouts out an incredibly athletic “thick pick”We also get into everything else from Week 5 in the NFL, including NFL offenses being very much alive, the Giants pulling off something not a lot of people thought was legal, some incredible trench trash talk, locker room “meat watchers,” and the breaking news of the Jets sudden head coaching vacancy. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free on Wondery+. Join Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Start your free trial by visiting http://wondery.com/NewHeightsOffer now....Follow New Heights on Social Media for all the best moments from the show: https://lnk.to/newheightshowSupport the Show: META: So. Many. Experiences. The way you watch, play, workout & hangout is about to get unreal. Pre-order Meta Quest 3S at https://www.meta.com/quest.ALLSTATE: Yeah, checking first is smart. So, check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You’re in good hands with Allstate. Visit https://Allstate.com for a quote today.LIQUID IV: Support everyday wellness with Liquid I.V. Get 20% off your first order of Liquid I.V. when you go to https://www.liquid-iv.com/newheights and use code NEWHEIGHTS at checkout.FARMERS DOG: Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food at https://www.thefarmersdog.com/newheights. Plus, you get FREE shipping! AMEX: Experience the powerful backing of American Express. For terms and to learn more, visit https://americanexpress.com/withamex.COCA-COLA: Tackle game day with great taste. Is Coke Zero Sugar the Best Coke Ever? Try and Decide. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jason, what's your Sleep Number setting?
I think it's 55, I think I had to lower it.
I've been going in between like.
I don't like it when it's too soft.
I like, yeah, I like.
It's got to be right in the middle.
I like a 65 to 75.
Yeah, I like a 65, 75.
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catch partner of the NFL. And as we all know, Travis came up big because he had someone special
in the stadium, someone that means a lot to him and
he really tries to always perform well when they're there and that is me.
Welcome back to New Heights, ladies and gentlemen, produced by Wave Sports and Entertainment
and a Wondry show. Make sure you guys check out Wondry Plus. We are your
hosts. I'm Travis Kelsey. My big brother Jason Kelsey out of Cleveland Heights, Ohio, Cincinnati
Bearcat alums. Subscribe on YouTube wherever you get your podcasts, Wondry Plus and follow the show
on all social media at New Heights Show with 1S. As you can see, this is a very special episode.
Me and Jason are never like, I never see him in his flesh.
It's Travis's birthday episode too.
This is not, my birthday was, is already past.
It's two days ago.
Don't bring my birthday up, like,
it's a part of this episode.
Has nothing to do with this episode.
You turned 35.
What?
You turned 35, that's a big birthday.
Everybody knows every time there's a five or a zero
at the end, it's a milestone birthday.
Nobody's ever said that.
What does it feel like to be 35 and still wear a Percocis Power shirt?
It feels like I'm the fatest skinny kid.
Congratulations, Mr. Kelsey.
You are now the fattest tight end in the universe.
Get on the field. Get on the field.
Get off the field.
Yeah.
Gosh.
That's killing it.
Yeah, we're together in Kansas City.
How about that?
That's right.
Yeah, Jason's look good, bud.
Look good.
Love that shirt. Just talking good, love that shirt.
Just talking about the.
All white was a bad choice.
What?
All white was a bad choice.
Nah, dude, those tits, you look great.
Nice.
Jason, why don't you actually tell people
what we're gonna talk about in the episode.
Sure, well, we got an outstanding episode
lined up for you guys.
We're gonna talk about Trav's big win
with the Chiefs over the Saints.
Hey-oo.
As well as me getting out of the house
and where we are currently being at Kansas City.
Kansas City, little car jam, little tailgating.
You got a bunch of good stuff as well as obviously
getting to everything else that happened
in week five in the NFL.
But first, as always.
As always.
New news.
New news. Coming in hot, a little new news brought to you by MetaQuest. That's right. Expand your world. Mama Kels is woman of the year or
one of the women of the year. First item of new news. Our mom was named one of Glamour
magazine's 2024 women of the Year.
Also on the cover, Beyonce's mom,
Selena Gomez's mother, and Billie Eilish's mom.
So that's a-
She's in good company.
Yeah, I don't, yeah, it's impressive.
It's impressive that Mama Kels has made it to the top.
I mean, those are top tier moms right there.
She described what it was like being our mom and in quotes, um,
being a mom is probably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
It's so much easier to just go to work,
but raising children when they're totally dependent on you and you're trying to
do the best you can with the limited resources you have. Um,
it's the most daunting task I've ever had to do. And mom, you made it look easy.
I'm not going to lie.
You made it look easy.
If it was that hard for you, I'm sorry if we made it harder
on you, cause I'm sure Jason did.
I know I didn't.
I made it easy.
I thought growing up was pretty easy.
Yeah.
Show up, lunch is packed, breakfast is made.
Yeah.
You sure made it.
Free rides everywhere is the best.
Yeah.
Mom and I'm, what does mom know?
That's your piece.
Amidst all the caravans, like you kidding me?
Doesn't get any better than that.
Happy as hell for you, mama.
Glamour magazine, this is cool.
This is cool, Inch.
You looked absolutely amazing, mom.
This is so good.
Shout out to all the other mothers
that are women of the year.
We also got a update on our film club poll.
We wanted to give you guys results of the online poll that was very much rigged from
the beginning by our friends Jitz Jake.
The winner by a huge margin of course is Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, whatever.
Don't say it right, Jason. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, whatever. Don't say it right, Jason.
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.
Thank you.
We will now watch this movie
and you guys will get a review
if you pay for the added
OneDream Plus feature,
which also includes no ads and a bunch of other benefits.
You will also hear
Like Jason.
The agonizing review.
Exactly. Of a movie. Agonizing.
Of a movie about pants. Dude, you are gonna love this movie. Two of my least favorite things.
Why do you hate sisterhood so much? I mean, I got a bunch of daughters. I don't, I guess I'm warming
up to sisterhood. There you go. There you go. Way to bring a full circle. All I know is this is this this whole thing. Jake threw a bunch of other movies that he knew would take votes from each
other so that the Swifties could just freaking dominate the poll with Sisterhood. They're trying
to like space balls, goonies and necessary roughness all took each other's votes.
I hope you're happy, Jake. I'm excited to watch. I think we were, we planned on watching this together.
You're honestly excited to watch this movie.
Yeah.
What in the title makes you excited to watch this movie?
Jason, I don't, I don't let the title dictate what gets me excited.
I read books all the time by their title and if it's a bad title, I don't read the book.
Well, take it from a guy that doesn't read books. Don't read into the title. Don't
just don't read the book. I don't even read the title.
Do you know anything about this movie? What is this movie about? I don't know.
It has Blake Lively in it and she's cool. Listen, I love Blake.
Yeah. I like watching films with people that I've met and I know. Oh, I watched, I watched Hugh Grant and, oh, what's, Julia Roberts, Nottingham Hill.
What is it?
Notting Hill.
I watched that one.
I enjoyed it.
Did you?
Yeah.
What's it about?
It's about, ah, see, this is why I'm not a good movie.
It's about, it's about two people that fall in love.
No, wait, hold on. Yeah, I could have told you that.
It's about two people that fall in love.
Uh, Julia Roberts is a is a celebrity.
And what do you call it?
Hugh Grant does not know this.
About two popular famous people that fall in love.
Sounds great.
No, one popular, one unpopular.
Who's the unpopular one, Hugh?
Yeah.
Pfft.
I don't know if that's realistic.
I know, right?
That's a good looking man.
Guys, everybody knows him.
You can't be that good looking and unpopular.
Hahaha.
That's a good point.
God damn it, this movie is not even realistic.
Hahaha.
Ah, thank you for bringing it to my butt.
No, no, if you guys are intofil-A, go watch that one.
That was a classic.
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You guys know we love to hit the links.
Jason's a, he's a new lover of the links, I think.
I think he's got the, he's got the edge now.
I've always loved it.
I just have more time now.
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now. It's an unreal price for all these awesome experiences. Let's move on some fan mentions of the week. Yeah. Let's shout out the fan mentions. Jason, go ahead and jump us off.
Sure. Yeah. Travis got a major compliment from the Fonz, AKA Coach Klein from the Waterboy.
Mythic oath. Or as you might know him, the legendary actor Henry Winkler on ex Twitter,
whatever you prefer to call it these days.
He quote tweeted a tweet from Kansas City, no better day to pull out some of Travis
Kelsey's greatest hits. And Mr. Winkler said, and Mr. K is doing an amazing job as an actor
on Grotesquerie on Fox. Did Fox pay him for this?
Yeah, no. Henry's son Max, Max Winkler is actually a director on the show. Yeah, so
he's a big fan of the show. Big fan of the Chiefs as well. Shout out to the Fonz. You
know, we love you over there in Chief's Kingdom and it's pretty cool, man. I remember watching
Happy Days Growing Up and it's just, you know, one of those life comes full circle moments. Can you give us any, so we're four episodes in. Yes. How many episodes?
You watched all four. I watched all four. I can't believe you're actually, so you like horror and
like thrillers and- Listen, if you put grotesquerie or Sister of the Traveling Pants up, I'm watching
fucking grotesquerie. All right, that's good. What, there's four episodes, how many episodes is there?
All right, that's good. What, there's four episodes.
How many episodes is there?
It's a great question.
Cool.
Brandon, you can figure that out.
What kind of turns are we in store for?
How many shoes are going to drop?
I'm not going to give away anything.
Well, just say how many shoes are going to drop.
There's something happening.
Yeah, there's about to be even more happening.
There is so much.
Just when you think like, all right,
everything's going to start to unfold, you're in, just buckle up. Yeah. Buckle up. Yeah. I feel like I already got it figured out.
Yeah, I know you do. We talked about this earlier. You don't have it figured out.
I can't tell if you are just a complete made-up figment of Nisi's or Lois's imagination.
Okay.
or Lois's imagination. If you're a demon or an angel, I'll accept both of those because they're
dichotomies. Or if you're the killer, I'm pretty sure you're not the killer,
unless you're possessing people. I saw you on the second, you said you didn't premiere to the third episode, I saw you in the second episode. What? Oh, you know, somebody did a great job of grabbing
the screenshot and I know that fucking tall shadow figure like the back. Yeah. Lurching.
I wish I was that sneaky.
Well I can tell you one person you're not a better actor than and that is Nisi Nash.
She is killing it.
Absolutely.
It has been awesome to watch and I can't wait to see the new episodes.
Is it two every week?
It was two the first two weeks.
You got to stop asking me this.
All right.
Cool. Max Winkler, please respond to this. You got gotta stop asking me this. All right, cool. Max, Max Winkler, please respond to this.
You gotta stop asking me this stuff.
I'm honestly, though, I'm along the ride
with everyone else.
I'm enjoying watching everything unfold
because I was so in and out of LA
over the off season filming this
that I didn't see any other like scenes
or anything like that.
So it's fun to, I don't know,
kind of get caught up on a lot of the storyline
or just not necessarily storyline,
but just everybody's performance,
how they're like, how they're portraying people.
And I think it's just cool.
It's cool to be a part of it and like still see like-
It's interesting to see the finished product.
Yes.
You see all the takes when you're doing it and like all this stuff. And then all of a sudden it's like, oh, that's how they. It's interesting to see the finished product. Yes. Cause you see all the takes when you're doing it
and like all this stuff and then all of a sudden it's like,
oh, that's what they were going for.
Yes.
They cut out all the other stuff.
Yeah, they, nice, less than me.
Got it, got it.
Perfect.
Oh, they didn't like that.
Yeah, yeah, okay, I didn't like that.
I knew, I knew when I got, there were like a few takes
where I was like, yeah, they didn't like that.
And those takes definitely didn't make it. So, but at least I felt it and I knew not to do
it again.
Yeah. Learning moment. Coaching.
I am coachable, I'll tell you that.
Do we think Fon saw the scene of you talking about Big Peter and his banana hammock?
Banana splitter.
Banana splitter.
Listen man, everybody's got a pass, Jason.
Hey, they do.
Yeah. It sounds like it sounds like it made me better.
You know what it sounds like?
What?
It sounds like Lois wants to remember Big Peter.
What?
Big Peter and Rago. That's right.
Yeah. When I was reading that on the script,
I was just like, this is going to somehow make it.
Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Yeah. I'll make this sound great.
Big Peter and his banana splitter. If I was a stripper, how would I make this sound?
Yeah. All right. Now let's get to some out of the house. That's right. But before we get into
Travis's game, we're going to talk about out of the house in Kansas City. Out of the house is
brought to you by Coke Zero Sugar. Tackle game day with irresistible taste of Coke Zero Sugar.
It's the best Coke ever. Try and decide. Jason,
how was your first Kelsey car jam? It's great.
I saw a bunch of really cool cars. Nice. I'm not, I'm, you know me,
I'm terrible with like make some models of cars. Yeah.
But I know when I see a car, if I like it. Fuck yeah.
And there was a lot of cool cars there. Yeah. Yeah. And I like of cars. But I know when I see a car if I like it. And there is a lot of cool cars there.
Yeah. And I like old cars. There were like two that stood out to me. There was a really old
Resto Mode Bronco. Nice. That looks sweet. Can't go wrong with a Bronco. And it was like...
What'd you say? What kind of Bronco? Resto Mode. So it was like, I think that's what it's called.
Resto Mod, Resto Mode, something like that. I don't know the pronunciation. Is that just like
a fancy word for restoration? Yeah, I think. So Resto's called. Resto mod, resto mode, something like that. I don't know the pronunciation. Is that just like a fancy word for restoration?
Yeah, I think.
So resto, restoration.
It's basically a old,
it's like the original look of the Bronco with all the new.
So the exterior is the original.
It's just like the frame and everything's brand new on it.
Okay, I got you.
So they've restored it,
but it's all original look and feel and everything.
Got it, okay.
That's cool. Yeah. That thing was awesome.
And then the monster truck did.
I fucking love monster trucks.
Yeah. I want to get in one so bad.
You want to ace Ventura it.
I just want to
it. To do to do bang bang to do to do.
Bang bang. Yeah.
My favorite was the international harvester pickup truck that was out there.
It's like a it's like a metallic grayish blue.
We got in it. There's a picture of me out there sitting in's like a metallic grayish blue. When I got in it, there's a
picture of me out there sitting in it. It was awesome.
Excited for the Ignition Lab to get their Bronco up and running. It looks absolutely awesome.
Are they working on it?
It has like the matte silver look right now. Yeah, it was sweet. They showed like how far along they were with it. And then on top of that, they're auctioning off the 1969 Chevelle
that they turned into an electric car
to put a Tesla engine under it.
And when I say they,
these high school kids at the ignition lab.
Yeah, why don't you explain what the ignition lab is
for people that don't.
So the ignition lab is,
it's an extension of what Operation Breakthrough
has been doing with their STEM labs in the
building.
And STEM is science, technology, engineering, math.
And they have just a bunch of like, I don't know, rooms of like the mechanics, the has
a entertainment studio.
It has a whole bunch of stuff that these kids can get their hands on and get into.
And it's just, it's an awesome.
Get training and expertise and yeah.
It gets just everything.
And it's just, it's giving these kids something that they wouldn't have otherwise and giving
kids something to do outside of school and after school and something they can gravitate
towards and see if they enjoy.
One of them is the mechanic shop, like I just just mentioned and they actually turned a 69 Chevelle into an electric car by doing the welding and all the, I don't know, the
Tesla battery pack that's on the bottom of it or in the front, the back trunk. It's pretty
cool.
Yeah. They got my Chevy Silverado. They're converting to electric right now.
Nice, dude.
And it's a 1986 square body Chevy and I still haven't been, I need to make it to
Operation Breakthrough in the ignition lab and all that. But I'm fired up to see what it's like. And
they said they're going to try and teach me to weld. Which I think also sounds pretty good.
It's pretty sweet. Yeah. If it's anything like soldering, I'm going to be fucking terrible at
it. Yeah, I would know. I mean, it's definitely not like soldering, but it's kind of like, I don't know.
We don't know what the fuck we're talking about.
No, no idea.
Well, that's why you go to places that do and you get to learn.
Shout out to Operation Breakthrough.
Shout out to Kelsey Card Jam.
It was an awesome event.
Shout out to everyone that showed up.
It was really awesome to see the community support.
Everybody there, obviously it goes towards a good cause.
Kansas City always shows up, baby. That's why I love it here, man.
Whether it's foundation events, whether it's, you know, celebrating somebody or just, you know, good old cheese game, baby. They're showing up no matter what, man. That's why we love them.
Tailgate with cheese kingdom. Moving on to game day. ESPN sent you out into the kingdom.
That's right. You were you were tailgating a little bit out there in the parking lot.
I was. Yeah.
What was it like? What was it like tailgating at Arrowhead?
I've only tailgated at Eagles games.
Yeah, and I've only been to one tailgate.
I have been to a tailgate before Chief's Kingdom
for a playoff game years ago, but I didn't really venture around.
I was kind of just in one spot and it was like a it was like a Budweiser tent that was there or whatever. And I just stayed there.
And then every other time I go to your games, you have the bus that takes everybody there. So I just
go with that. So I really haven't tailgated a lot. So I thought it'd be cool to go experience it.
And I was only able to be out there for like 40 minutes maybe.
Like it was quick.
Yeah.
But they were running me around the golf cart.
I was meeting all sorts of people.
It was awesome.
It was great.
Good food, good people.
I love it.
Everybody just looking to have a good time, getting fired up for the game.
Come on now, baby.
It's Kansas City.
I asked everybody like why they do it and they're like, hey, everybody around here is
like family now.
Like they've been going to do it for years.
Season ticket holders.
There was more New Orleans food
than there was Kansas City food.
I had so much like gumbo and jambalaya.
I didn't see any barbecue or anything.
I mean, it was around,
but most of the stuff that everybody was eating
where I was at,
I think that it's common for, I guess,
the teams to make the food that they're playing.
Kind of like a fun, hot luck deal that they got going on.
I guess.
There's also a decent amount of New Orleans fans
in the tailgate that showed up.
Huh?
All right.
So it's fun.
I always like it.
That's the beautiful thing about sports.
It's a unifying thing.
Everybody comes together.
And you try and kill each other.
But then you're friends afterwards.
Yeah.
It's the best.
It doesn't always work out like that, but yeah.
Learned how to suction cup a beer can to my palm.
I'm sorry, what?
Yeah.
The tailgate was incredible.
Had an Abner Haynes jersey on.
Nobody asked me a single thing about Abner Haynes.
You can tell everybody about the Abner Haynes
because I was, you asked me to try and help you out
with this and I was like, yeah, perfect.
No problem.
And it was- The KC Pro Shop hooked it up for sure. You asked me to try and help you out with this and I was like, yeah, perfect. No problem.
And it was-
The KC Pro Shop hooked it up for sure.
So this off season-
Shout out to the KC Pro Shop for getting the turnaround for us.
This off season, Abner Haynes died.
Oh, RIP.
Abner Haynes died, yes.
RIP.
He is in the Chief's Ring of Honor or Hall of Fame.
And I didn't know really who Avner Ames was.
And then obviously you see that he passes away.
So you start clicking articles and dude was just awesome.
It's a great running back,
like for the Dallas Texans and the Kansas City Chiefs.
But more important than that,
it felt like he was like really a member of the community.
I went to North Texas State, I believe.
North Texas State.
Which you know you're good if you're going to North Texas State and I believe. North Texas State. Which, you know you're good if you're going
to North Texas State and then going to the AFL.
Yeah.
AFL, nice.
Yeah, lived a good life of being a great football player
and a promising, like just awesome member of the community.
So I thought it'd be cool to pay honor
to the great Abner Haynes.
I love it, man.
Yeah.
Kansas City's got a bunch of them.
They do. They do. It's a story man. Yeah. Kansas City's got a bunch of them. They do.
They do.
It's a story franchise.
Bobby Bell, Willie Lanier.
Bobby Bell.
Who's Bobby Bell?
That's a great name.
Bobby Bell, defensive end, I believe, linebacker maybe.
No, Willie Lanier was definitely the linebacker.
Willie Lanier.
Yep.
He was a big time, he was always,
what is it, Walter Payton Man of the Year.
He's got a lot of honors for being awesome in the community, which it wasn't Walter Payton,
Man of the Year back then.
Yeah, but it's the equivalent now.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's a...
They really don't have an equivalent now, but yeah.
Met Willie, know Bobby, everybody.
Like the Chiefs ambassadors are the best.
Even when Len was alive, RIP Len Dawson,
when he was in the building,
he was actually one of the first guys I met. And there's just, I mean, the list goes on of ambassadors and chiefs kingdom
that kind of stick around and, you know, pass that legacy, man.
The best thing I ate at the tailgate probably was the cheddar brat, because I wasn't ready
for the cheddar. And the moment I bit into it, there was cheddar in it. And it was just
a magical moment.
You know, I'm out on that shit.
You're out on a cheddar brat?
Yeah.
What on earth are you out on a cheddar brat for?
I just, anything in like a casing like that, I'm out.
I just don't.
That's right.
You don't like cylindrical meats.
We've been over this.
They make sausage without like the casing around it.
No, no they don't.
I guarantee they do.
No.
Oh, you're talking about like tacos, taco meat.
That's not sausage.
All right. Well, I'm glad you enjoyed your jambalaya in Kansas City.
Also, that's a pasta lie. You ever had that?
No, I'm not. I'm also not a Creel, like New Orleans style food.
Oh, you were missing out.
I hear this all the time and every time I try it, I'm just like,
Still not feeling it.
Every time.
Well. I think it's just a mental block.
Stanislav Yeah, or you just don't like it. Is it the spice? Like, what do you not like about it?
Marshall M. Jambalaya, I just, there's something about just like water and rice,
I just don't think.
Stanislav It's like a soupy rice?
Marshall M. Soupy rice, I just, and then it's like curry, it's like pooey.
Stanislav Pooey?
Marshall M? Yeah.
You're talking about color?
Yeah.
You're still judging foods by their color.
No, I can't.
You're still at this stage.
It's not even judging it.
It's just like, it's like a mental block.
Like, oh, that's.
That's poop.
Yeah.
Do you like curry?
Do you just, do you just not?
Dude, you know I'm starting to open up to.
I know.
To the Indian cuisine. My girl Tay's getting you opened up. She is, she's introducing new foods to you. And it's been one of the
greatest things that I've been happy about. And the Israeli spot in Philadelphia, Zahav.
Zahav. Yep. Shout out to Michael Solomonov. That was awesome. Yeah. I like that spot a
lot. Yeah. I'm still picky when it comes to like what I'll eat on it, but yeah, or eat
on the table. But at the same time, it's like, I'm sorry, you enter out to like what I'll eat on it but yeah or eat on the table
but at the same time it's like I'm...
So are you in or out on curry?
I'm down to dance.
I'll dance.
Are you in or out on curry?
I'm in on like a light curry.
The more it's like it gets thicker and it looks like a baby food or like baby shit,
then I'm out.
So you just have a mental block with foods that look like poop.
Food that looks like it just came out of a butthole?
Yes.
I do have a mental block for that.
Big Scott on Chili fan.
Oh, you know, I'm so in.
Just throw cheese on it.
I'll be all right.
Just won't even notice.
Won't even know.
Come out the same way he went in.
Sorry, guys.
Well, I don't know what else to add there.
What's better tailgating at the link or tailgating at Arrowhead?
Don't be biased.
I don't, I haven't really, I mean, I did some, I did do a little bit of tailgating
at the link, but it wasn't, the tailgating I went to at the link had an alligator, which
I don't think is regional to the Philadelphia area.
So I'm not sure why there was an alligator.
I mean, they were both great. I think, honestly, I don't think I got a,
because of this short time period and we were moving because I had to get on Monday Night Countdown, I think I'd probably want to get back to Kansas City to do like a fuller tailgate. And the only
one I've been to with the Eagles in tailgated was when I was doing Monday Night Countdown as well.
So like I've just been, because I have to work later, I haven't been able to drink and
fully experience the tailgates the way I probably normally would.
They've been great and the people there top notch at both establishments.
I almost blew out my man Dumpy's ACL.
Shout out to Dumpy.
He's all right.
That's a big dude, man.
Three point stance, chest bump. you forced him into doing that too
He didn't want he asked me before we went up there to do it. Yeah, then he was like nah
This isn't a good idea like we're doing it
well
Once you get on the ride you can't get off
Little Monday night countdown hey well you didn't sign any babies, but you did sign a leg during a commercial break.
I did.
Prostetic leg.
That's a, that was pretty cool.
Did you, was that the guy wearing the 62 jersey?
No, this is a woman.
Oh, okay.
Nice.
A fan in the crowd sent their prosthetic leg down
to have you guys sign it.
And I know it was a woman because as I was signing,
I looked up and she had her leg up in the air and there was nothing mid chin and down.
She was a good tell that that.
And I was like, oh, that's her leg.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was a dead giveaway.
Not my first leg I've signed.
Ooh, who's?
I think I signed a Vets leg that was an Eagles fan at some event that I've been to.
But this is the first Monday Night Football Countdown League that has been signed.
Very cool.
Me, Ryan Swagu and Scott Bimpelt all signed it.
So I hope you're happy with those signatures.
I mean, she threw her leg up, so it's, you get what you get at that point.
100%.
Guess what's nice about the prosthetic.
I suppose like some people get tattoos now. You can just...
You just get another prosthetic.
I don't think it's just...
They're probably pretty expensive.
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All right, we want to do the donut bit. Cool. So before we get to football, we're going to
review some donuts. Lamar's donuts. Oh, yeah. This is specific to Kansas City. Oh, yeah. Since 1933.
Oh, yeah. Right on the box. Yeah, it does, right there.
And we've had-
Celebrating 90 years, how about that?
Donuts have been around for 90 years.
Well, these donuts have probably been around longer than 90 years.
That's a good point.
Lamar back then, back in 1933, figured it out.
Yellow box, man, I see these things.
This is like fucking, this is like seeing gold.
It's like finding Pokemon when you see a fucking yellow box that's on like a random desk, football facility. It's like,
oh shit, I wonder if they got the blueberry glaze in there.
Marshall S. You know that I'm a very
critical of donuts. I don't like cake donuts. It's a waste of time. Don't know why anybody likes them.
It's not a donut, it's a cake. It's a circular cake.
A donut needs to be fluffy and airy.
You always start with glaze, go with the simplest thing.
Don't get all these concoctions where they try and sell you on these gimmicky donuts.
Didn't you have a gimmicky donut named after you?
I did and we raised some money so it was for a good cause.
Some people like them. Listen, if that's what you like, that's what you like, but you
always start with a simple donut. Give it a little pull test. It's a good pull. It's
a good pull part.
It is.
It's got good gluten structure.
Yeah. And it's also this is in the afternoon and these were made in the morning. So
it's good observation.
It's good donut. Yeah it is really good donut. Fantastic donut. You can see how like Jason's fingerprints are like they're in it. It's got it's got good squish and rebound though. Yeah.
They're in it. You know what I mean?
It's got good squish and rebound though.
Yeah.
It's got good squish and rebound.
The glaze is a little like crystalline, if that makes sense.
I like a nice little like chunk.
I mean, it's not bad.
I like a nice little sugary chunk here and there.
It's not bad.
Very good.
Yep.
It almost tastes like it's like almost a little bit under baked.
Dude, I'm telling you.
And I think that that's good though. Like it's, I like it's like almost a little bit under baked. Dude, I'm telling you. I think that that's good, though.
Like it's I like it.
But it could have.
Oh, yeah.
I could have maybe spent like a second more in the fryer.
All right.
I got the best one in the box.
How's Portnoy do this?
Would you give it like something out of 10 or something like that?
I mean, it is 10 out of 10 right here.
You can't give it a 10.
Yeah, I can.
What do you do with the rest of the donuts?
What if we get a donut that's better than that one then?
It's what?
What if you get a donut better than this
and you've already rated this a 10?
What do you rate that one?
That's a good point.
That's why you don't ever go straight to 10.
I gotta re-rate this one then.
You can't re-rate.
Yes, you can.
Can't re-rate.
Yeah, this is 10 out of 10.
That's why you don't go 10.
You got to go below 10.
You always got to give options to go higher.
No.
It's a good donut.
It's a fucking 10 out of 10.
It's not a 10.
It's slightly under baked.
It's got a great structure.
Sugary glaze could be a little bit more smooth.
I'm gonna go 7, 8.
What?
I'll go 8,2. Good donut. Good donut. Really good donut.
Very happy with this donut. Yeah. You're serious about your reviews. I think this is a phenomenal
donut. I'm enjoying the hell out of it. And when I feel this, I give it a 10. So you're
gonna get a lot of 10 donuts. Dude. What's up with, but they also have cake.
I eat 10 donuts.
So they also have cake.
Every Friday before practice.
You eat 10?
Well, rated, I only eat like four.
But that's just to carve up right before Friday practice.
They also have cake.
I just don't know how anybody could prefer this to this.
They need the, yeah, I hear you.
They need the blueberry glaze.
There's a food.
This is the lazy man's doughnut.
It goes good with coffee.
It goes good with coffee.
Listen, I'm not saying it's bad.
Like it's sugar and dough.
It's gonna be good.
Fucking love these things.
I'm just wearing all this sugar too
and I'm just gonna piece by piece just eat it.
All right.
Mark, there you have it.
8.2, 10, meaningless.
If you're in Kansas City, make sure you check out Lamar's.
You got a bunch of locations all over the place.
Bold topics to wrap up week five in the NFL.
Yeah, baby.
Starting with my game.
That's right.
How about that?
Chiefs 26, Saints 13.
I don't even know if that score adequately reflects
how much you guys pretty much dominated the whole game.
If you guys could get in the end zone fucking more,
it would be even higher.
Don't tell me about it.
Let's start with the offense.
You guys dominated the time of possession the entire first half.
Really got to go and cream hunt and again, another solid outing.
Coming out of nowhere, wasn't on anybody's team and sure enough, him and Juju Smith-Schuster,
you think that they're kind of done in the NFL.
They come to the Chiefs and look like two of the best players in the NFL.
I don't get how these guys were just.
Well, Jesus Masutra was in New England.
He didn't have any quarterbacks throwing him the ball.
That's a good point.
Yeah.
Kareem had Nick Chubb over there in Cleveland.
One of my favorite quarterback sneakers.
They were there.
I mean, Nick Chubb, you want to give that guy the ball?
You do.
And we want to give Kareem the ball and he's absolutely killing it right now.
He's doing great.
You guys have needed it in a Pops absence.
Him and Carson Steele have stepped up.
Dundee.
Kareem Hunt ended with 102 yards, a touchdown.
For some stat nerds out there, which I know everybody loves
that now.
Just a Northeast Ohio ball player, baby.
This is his first touchdown as a chief in 2,149 days.
It was a Kareem Hunt style touchdown.
Just break a few tackles, run through a few arm tackles.
Did he break some tackles?
I'm pretty sure Kareem breaks at least one tackle every time he touches a ball.
Every time?
Yeah.
That's a good running back ad.
He's also the first chief to carry the ball 27 times
since, oh yeah, that's right, Kareem Hunt also did that on December 24th, 2017.
It was a good idea back in 2017. Now it's still a good idea to hand him.
Especially if it's working. Juju Smith-Schuster also had some stats out there. Led all receivers
for the Kansas City Chiefs to seven receptions for 130 yards. Everybody was wondering what that Kansas City offense
was going to look like without Rashid Rice, how they were going to place him. And Juju
goes out there with a big game for 130. Almost had a touchdown, but we'll talk about that
in a second. Some stats for those nerds, Juju's 130 receiving yards are his most in the game
since the 2020-2021 season wild card round with the Steelers. Juju's 130 receiving yards are his most in the game since the 2020-2021 season
wild card round with the Steelers. Juju is also the first chief swat receiver not named
to She-Rice with 100 plus yards receiving in a single regular season game since, that's
right, Juju again had 124 yards against 49ers on October 23rd, 2022.
Yeah.
Yeah. Why was it so easy to simply just put Juju in the game and then all
of a sudden him to ball out? Well, one, both these guys are familiar with the offense. They're
familiar with the scheme. I think they're familiar with the nucleus of the coaching staff and the
players that we got here. So they just, honestly, it just felt like we got our guys back in the building.
It wasn't, there was no like,
all right, let's ease them into it.
It was like, no, they're ready to rock and roll right now.
And all the terminology and all the plays.
And I mean, Juju's won a Superbowl with us.
Kareem's had unbelievable success in this offense before.
So I think when it comes down to what Coach Reed is going to call,
everybody is very familiar on how to have success with it.
Yeah. And Andy knows how to utilize those guys to their strengths.
100%. And Pat knows how to get these guys the ball.
And he's trusting it, which is awesome to see.
Well, the other person he's trusting is primetime big yeti.
That's right.
As we all know, Travis came up big because he had someone special in the stadium,
someone that means a lot to them.
And he really tries to always perform well when they're there.
And that is me.
Have I, have I ever had a bad game?
Not in Kansas City.
I didn't have a great game when we played you guys.
You've always had good games when I show up.
Well, I guess last year I didn't have a great game.
Which one?
Which game?
The playoff game?
You dominated the playoffs.
Those were the only games I went to last year.
Oh, I thought I was like talking to like the games that I played against you guys.
Oh, that's true.
The game that we played last year wasn't like outstanding.
Yeah.
The Super Bowl game, you had a couple big catches.
Yeah.
You didn't go for 100, but you still went.
It was a good day.
It was like 90 or something.
89 or something.
Yeah.
You still had a good day.
I do love a good Monday night showdown.
Come on now.
God damn.
Come on now.
I mean, I was fired up for that.
It's also the knees feel a little bit better.
You got a little bit extended rest too.
All right now. All right now. I mean, I was fired up for that. It's also the knees feel a little bit better. Got a little bit extended rest too. Hey, all right now.
It's crazy what that extra day does.
It's yeah. One just 24 hours later.
It's crazy how big of a difference it makes for the body is remarkable,
which he will pay the price of this week.
Oh, you know, by week. I forgot. Yeah.
That's nice. Yeah.
So you're not on a short week.
I mean, I'd rather have a shorter's nice. Yeah. So you're not on a short week.
I mean, I'd rather have a shorter week
and have my bye later in the season, but.
It's fair, yeah.
Early bye sucks.
Yeah.
Dude, the Chiefs have the ability
to turn the lights off and on now in the stadium.
Like-
Time out, they didn't have an off switch for their lights?
No, I don't think so.
I think they were always on.
There's no way that's possible.
Either that or like, you know,
remember like in like the gym and high school
or like older lights when you turn them off, it would take them a while to go off.
You turn them on, you'd have to wait for it.
Yeah. They're not fluorescent.
What is it? Yeah.
I don't know the name of them.
But yeah, now we have the ability because they replaced the tunnel.
The lights were off.
And I was like, man, we hadn't had that before.
How about that?
Top flight organization, chiefs getting new lights.
How about it, baby?
Who said we had the worst facilities?
Billions of dollars at stake here and we can finally turn our lights off and on, add a
button.
Let's get right to the play.
Everybody's talking about Travis and that's the lateral.
You guys got about, I don't know, how much time was left in the half? Maybe 30 seconds, something like that's the lateral. You guys got about, I don't know how much time was left in the half,
maybe 30 seconds, something like that.
No way. It was not 30 seconds.
It was like two minutes, like just under the two minutes.
No chance there was two minutes left.
You guys are way under the two minutes.
We got the ball back and almost scored again.
Oh, this was the first position. Yeah.
Am I right on that?
Three and a half minutes left. Yeah, thank you. OK, I thought that this was the first position. Yeah. Am I right on that? Three and a half minutes left.
Yeah, thank you.
Okay.
I thought that this was the second two minute deal.
Yeah.
All right.
Either way.
All right.
There you go.
Thank you.
Third and 22, most teams are like, hey, let's just get the ball in the middle of the field,
push it forward, make it a little bit easier for old butt kicker.
And you guys decided to not do that.
Well, I actually went into the huddle like, hey boys, let's just get, let's just make sure
we get in the field goal range here. I remember saying that in the huddle.
Yeah.
And then Pat literally said, yeah, listen, you are that, like you're the underneath guy.
Like if you're open quick.
I'm probably going to go to you.
Yeah.
Just kind of get north, get as much as you can. We're kicking the field goal. Yeah. Well, that's
not what you did. Here's a clip for those of you that didn't see what he did. He did probably the
riskiest thing that any coach, like anybody else that does this. Stick to the plane. Oh my god,
he's ladder rolling again. Oh my gosh. Hey, how about that? We almost got it first down.
and then, oh my God, he's laddering again. Oh my God.
Hey, how about that?
We almost got it first down.
What was going on here?
I don't, so I knew before you even pitched this,
when you caught it and the first thing you did
was not tuck it, but you held it like this.
I was like, this dude is, and you looked,
and I'm like, this dude is about to pitch the ball.
Then you tucked it.
I was like, okay, thank God he's not pitching.
And I was like, oh no, he actually is still gonna do it.
So what goes on in your head?
It all happens so fast.
I kind of black out,
which I'm sure Coach Reed is gonna love hearing.
I'm sure Coach Reed doesn't care
because there's never been one of these
that hasn't worked out.
One.
Otherwise, we're not gonna.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah, we don't wanna jinx this.
So when you catch this ball,
do you just know that P Ryan's going to be in the flat?
I had no idea that he had a chip, anything on the backside.
I was looking you just know I was reversing.
I was reversing field.
I felt guys over everyone pursuing to you.
And I was like, oh, I should get more yards going this way.
Yeah. And then then I realized I couldn't get more yards going that way.
But what is causing you to look and see if there's somebody behind you?
There's a guy in red over here. I just feel him.
You just feel that?
Yeah. It's like fast break basketball. You just, you're here.
You just feel your guy running the lane.
You look like Larry Bird out there.
Larry Bird?
Larry Legend.
I'll take that.
Just a better looking version. I mean, Larry was an ugly guy.
Yeah, but Larry's a smooth operator.
He was very smooth.
Yeah, he was.
Well, you got the fourth and one.
It was incredible.
I mean, you can't just throw it on me.
It's Samaj, unbelievable job by P. Ron to actually like
be ready, because he was kind of like shuffling.
Did you see his code after he came?
No, I didn't.
What did he say?
It's not in here, but he was like, yeah.
Because he hasn't, P-Round's only been here for how long?
Three weeks.
Exactly.
Four weeks. No, I guess the beginning of the season.
It was like right around the start of the season.
Yeah, he's been here for five weeks now.
I don't think he was, was he there for week one?
I think so.
Okay. So he's been here, but he was a late edition.
Yeah, he was definitely here since the beginning of the season for sure.
So either way, he was like, yeah, you know, I saw him do it a couple of times in practice
and I just figured, you know, hey, I guess I'll just stay in phase here.
It's a ball player right there.
It's a ball player right there.
I love it, man.
They were like, have you ever been a part of something like that?
He's like, nah.
What was it like?
He's like, hey, it's like I'm playing backyard football.
It's fun.
Let's go baby. Some other reactions. Coach Reed was asked
about it and this was actually going into half. Coach Reed was asked about that play and he said,
we do it every day in practice. I can't tell you the name of it. So Andy clearly acted like this
was something that was called. I mean, he's not lying. Scott told me this on,
cause I did the halftime segment too.
And they said this clip and I was like,
there ain't no chance that he's called.
The old reverse field lateral.
From our foot.
No, yeah.
And especially in that situation, no, that was not called.
Coaches in line though.
We do it every day.
I mean, Smojc said it too. He was ready for it for a reason.
And I think they might, should just start letting you do it.
I think Andy kind of does.
Listen, you have to let it...
What did Andy say to you?
I haven't talked to coach about it.
See, that's how he's, you know, he's letting you do it.
Well, I told him.
If anybody else did it, he would be crushing them.
What? Why would he be crushing them. What?
Why would he be crushing them if he got us a fourth and one
and a chance to convert?
Because most people, if they try and do that a lot,
it's going to lead to fumbles and turnovers.
But he knows for some reason you have this weird Spider-Man
sense for lateraling the football.
That doesn't make any sense.
I'll tell you what, Tyrone.
Other than the fact you played basketball. My guy, Honey Bad badger, Tyler Matthew could have absolutely smoked me on that play.
He ran right past you. Full speed.
You'll see me. I like brace myself.
Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah.
You would be exposed.
You like bold it.
No, man, it was a fun play and it got us a fourth and one and got us a chance to convert, man.
Another quote from one of your teammates, Pat was asked about the play.
I told him I was, I told him I was throwing it to him so we can kick a field
goal. Yes, makes sense. Um, and he laddles it all the way across the field.
It's like I'm talking to Sterling.
His daughter.
In one ear out the other.
I got you.
For sure. I'm pretty sure I replied with, I got you.
Yeah, no, that's it.
Yeah, what else would we be doing here?
Yeah, no, I got, no, I'm with you.
Field goal.
Fourth and one, okay, we're going for touchdown.
Cause you guys ended up getting the fourth and one.
We got the fourth and one,
but we ended up kicking the field goal.
But hey, kept the drive alive.
Yeah.
Nick Sirianni actually called me this morning
asking if it was a design play.
Dude, if you watch it from like the full 22,
there's no way you could think.
You don't think it does?
All because of the chip?
It's the chip and on top of that,
it's just like the lateral across field.
Yeah.
Like that's, I'm not banking on that as a coach,
that everything's gonna go right
to where somebody could run a cross field
and then throw it.
That's fair.
I think he knew the answer when he was asking it to me.
Yeah.
He just wanted to hear it.
But we do practice it.
Then we got you in the Wildcat.
Second half, Pat motions out,
the big yeti goes to the cue position,
and you guys do a little zone read type option. It wasn't a zone, but you guys do a little zone read type option.
It wasn't a zone, but you guys do a little read,
and read the end.
It was like the power lead.
Yeah, exactly.
With Xavier worthy going on like a little,
he's going flat at the end, collapses on the run.
Jason, you know this play are too well, man.
This is the first play I've ever had in college football.
Just a nice little...
Triumphs with a touchdown at the bottom. Follow Jason up the lane, man. Right up the hash, baby. first play I've ever had in college football, just a nice little
transfer touchdown.
Of the lane, man. Right up the hash, right? But you did not hand it off or you did not keep it.
You handed it off to Xavier who went around the end.
Well, you gotta read the end. You gotta read the end.
You can't tell you wanted to keep that bitch.
I almost you drag that readout as long as possible.
Please take it. Please take that.
I have to see if you can't. some of these DNs are getting savvy
on these reads.
So you gotta, you gotta keep them honest.
And then they'll jump back out.
You're right.
You gotta keep them honest.
They're seeing it a lot more nowadays,
especially with the way offenses are incorporating
these types of plays more and more.
At the end of the day, if it's cloudy,
give it to the fastest guy on the team.
That's probably a safe bet.
It's like, all right, he can just run everybody.
Go run in there. I'll tell you what, man, he's fine.
You can score the touchdown. Xavier's been killing it, man.
He has been. I absolutely love watching him play, man.
I love playing with him on the field.
And he he has this crazy like ability
when he has the ball to just get like he's like this.
He's already skinny, but he just slithers.
He slithers through shit.
Slither is a good trait for a ball carrier.
It is, and I'm not gonna lie.
He slithered his way in on that one.
We needed it big.
Well, he also slithered his way over to his mama.
After the touchdown, Zafiore Worthy found his mom
in the stands and gave her the ball,
which, hey, how can you not love a guy
that's giving the ball to mama?
Yeah, you already know.
What's mama?
I was trying to catch him the whole time. I was like, come here. Come here. I handed
it to you.
Yeah.
You're going to your mama.
Oh, nice. Yeah. Love it.
Yep.
Gotta show mom some love. Well, she'll put that one on the mantle, I'm sure.
Then we got to talk about the other thing. And that's the thing that has been dominant
for the Chiefs for, I mean, two years now.
And that's this defense.
Spagnola has been running the best defense in the NFL
for close to two years now.
Spags, man, I love that guy.
What else is there to say about the defense
that hasn't already been?
I mean, I knew, listen, when you went,
New Orleans struggled big time against the Eagles
and Jalen Carter, and then they're out three interior guys
or two interior guys.
I'm like, dude, Chris Jones is about to have a day
and he did not disappoint.
He was all over the place.
I mean, it's Chris Jones.
I'm pretty sure you could have your interior guys in there.
It's a good point.
It doesn't matter.
But I mean, even with those guys out,
it's like even more like,
gosh, how are they gonna do this?
And they did it.
You gotta have a plan.
Well, they had a plan.
And then they got Chris Jones.
I mean, I get it.
Mr. Jones!
Mr. Jones!
Me!
I can't do it right now.
He's got a thing going on, man.
It's Mr. Jones.
He's got a thing going on.
He's swimming the gods.
Bull rushing the center.
Man, he is uh, he wants to talk about slithery. It's a big slithery guy right there.
Yeah, that's a guy that shouldn't be slithery but he is.
But he is.
Yeah.
Like he does like I feel like whenever I like get a chance to block him in practice,
he just knows that he could just pick me up and move me.
Yeah.
So he just has fun trying to slither me.
Yeah. Well, he knows he can go to that.
Yeah. So it works on the slitheriness
so that he has both in his pocket.
The defense got the momentum going right from the jump
when B cook my way.
Yeah, because my man car just threw me.
It was like a jackpot throw. Jackpot.
What was he doing?
Just to do what was he doing?
What was that throw? I love Derekard. Derekard. Who doesn't? I fucking love him. When he's on, he's like the best goalkeeper. I don't know what that was.
I've seen Derekard throw some, throw some teddies. Of course.
He threw me one in the Pro Bowl, actually. He threw one in this game.
Yeah, he did. He had to do a bomb. Yeah, it was fucking. You rebounded nice from the interception.
I was it was one of my like backyard football moments in the Pro Bowl.
Yeah, he's in there. We get into the red zone.
We had ran the the Tampa, the corner concept so many freaking times.
Yeah. And I went up to I was like, hey, if they play in that cover three,
I'm just about to run that corner post.
And he looked at me, he was like, he like registered in his head.
He's like, all right.
Sure enough, right.
I'm talking about on time three in a hitch.
So the same throw he made in that game is the same throw.
Because they ran a corner post.
That's what they scored on.
Yes. But mine wasn't like 80 yards downfield.
It was just like a little like 15 yard touchdown.
But essentially, yeah, he's ready for it.
There you go.
I just I just like it when like, QBs are just ball players. You know what I mean? Like
guys, they like-
They're not regimented into like the lines on the paper. This read, then this read, then
this read. And then I do this.
You got to go out here and make sure you shake.
Yeah. Make sure. Yeah. Well, here's some stats for the Chiefs defense that has been unbelievable through the first
half of the season, well, through the first quarter of the season.
The opposing teams feature running backs are a combined 66 carries for 169 yards.
That is a whopping 2.6 yards per carry.
Zilch, Derek Henry, who has been on, looked unstoppable these last few weeks for Baltimore. I guess really
just that last play this past week, but 13 carries for 46 yards against the Chiefs.
Zach Moss, 12 carries for 34 yards. Bijon Robinson, heard of that guy. He ran all over the Eagles.
16 carries for 31 yards. JK Dobbins, 14 carries. I mean, these are awful stat lines. Alvin Kamara,
one of the best running backs over the last one. I mean, you just named four of the top running backs in the NFL right there.
And not just like this year, like that had been up there. Alvin Kamara, 11 carries, 26 yards.
Again, I went into the game not expecting much. Spags was a good one.
And he got half of those yards on a... That's right. Never versed.
A play that was shut down. A broken play that he made happen.
on a that's right never versed like a play that was broken play that he made happen yeah which that's what he does and obviously we can throw spags names
out there but the defense just plays so great together yeah and when it comes to
the run game Mike Dana George Karloff these guys are just like playing their
part and then you got the backers just flying the whole is all over the place
Bolton she's still screens out I Bolton, Trank. He sniffs screens out. I mean, he's...
Drew Tranquil's out there flying the fuck around.
Yeah.
Is Leo Chanel a DN now?
He's everything.
He's our like jack of all trades.
He can just do everything.
Yeah.
He's just fucking...
John Cena!
I just want to see him come to the game in jorts and a fucking big tee and a hat sideways
like this.
You guys saw a few familiar faces come to the game this week.
Four former chiefs, including Tyron Matthew, Willie Gay, and Colin Saunders.
My brother from another.
And he caught a nice little juju, kind of missed one of them, went off his hands right
into the big man's hands. And take a look at this highlight. He caught a nice little juju, kind of missed one of them, went off his hands right into
the big man's hands and take a look at this highlight.
He was moving.
Thick pick.
Thick pick.
That's a nice-
Thick pick.
He was moving.
According to NextGen stats, 15.8 miles per hour on this 36 yard interception return.
That doesn't even do it justice.
You got to watch it.
His little legs were a churning.
Bro, those legs aren't little.
His stride is little.
No, them legs are small short.
He's got short little stumpy legs and they were trucking.
I mean, former running back in college.
He looked like it.
Yeah.
It was an impressive like athletic run.
Yeah.
It wasn't like a detachable deal.
I've seen that guy do backflips.
I've seen the social clips, too.
He's a good athlete.
And this was an impressive pick.
All I could hear was the Super Mario star theme song.
That's so good. Littly, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty, litty The third fastest speed by a ball carrier who weighs over 320 pounds.
I suppose that's a compliment.
That's hilarious.
Since 2016, which I think is like when they started recording this type of data.
Third fastest fat guy.
Well, third fastest big like extra fat guy.
Yeah, because he's not the fattest, but he's very many guys over 320.
I felt like I ran into a fucking brick wall when I on the play
It was like I caught the ball and that the play that was designed
It's like it's such a bang bang play like I catch it and I'm already having to like lean forward
So it's like either the holes there. It's not yeah
He was just standing right in and I'm just like,
well, we're going right. Yeah. And he is a, all the muscle. Let me tell you,
if you're 320 pounds doing flips, there ain't a lot of Lucy Goosey to that 320.
That is a boulder with short, stumpy legs on it. And he is also the brother.
Oh, there he is. Look at him with the, the, uh, gas mask.
The Bayne mask. You're getting some fresh oxygen.
I'd have been tired after that.
Just O2.
For sure.
The bronze side of the game with eight catches in the first half of tonight's
game, Travis Tide, his record for second most catches in the first half of a
regular season game in his career.
What the fuck am I reading?
He has had eight plus first half receptions versus the Los Angeles Chargers on October
22nd, 23rd, and 9.
And then he last had exactly eight first half receptions at Hughes.
So, he had a really good first half.
That's what that stat means.
Week six, the next time the Chiefs are going to play, is going to be week six.
They're on a bye this week or week seven.
They're on a bye this week. The next time they're on a buy this week. Next week, the next time
they're going to play is going to be against San Fran. I see, this is what pisses me off. San Francisco,
do you know that they don't like being called San Fran, San Franciscans?
No.
Like what do they, like they get mad if you like abbreviate. I don't know because they're
too good to be called San Fran. You don't get to choose your nickname. Everybody knows that growing up, your nickname is what your nickname is. People for Sam Fran. You don't get to choose your nickname Everybody knows that growing up your nickname is what your nickname is people choose your nickname
You don't get to choose your own nickname. Don't tell me what to call you Sam Fran now. I want to call you Sam Fran more
I'm gonna shorten them more. You guys are now Franny. You guys play Franny
Week seven next week. I won't I won't be a part of this. You don't want to give them any more gas? I don't know. Well, hey, they don't need any more juice. They're going to be fired up to get back in the wincom.
They're not happy with how things have gone, I'm sure.
Man, it was tough watching them this week.
Yeah.
Do you have any bye week points?
Of course I do.
You going to tell anybody?
No, but if any of it comes out, I'm sure we'll talk about it on the show.
Sounds good.
All righty, it's time to talk about it on the show. Sounds good.
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Let's move along to some week five storylines, talk about some of the
biggest storylines coming out of week five in the NFL. Me and Jason actually
watched Sunday football together. We did. We did. I fell asleep on some of those
afternoon games. The four o'clock games you took a nice little nap, which you're getting ready to play Monday.
Yeah and you dosed off there a little bit towards the end. I did. I took a nice little nap, which you're getting ready to play Monday. So yeah. And you, you dozed off there a little bit towards.
I didn't. I took a little 15 minute nap.
But that's what Sundays are for.
Yeah. Sunday was officially the longest day of NFL football ever. How about that?
The London game kicked off at 9 32 a.m. Eastern on Sunday and Sunday night football ended at
1 a.m. Eastern because of the rain delay. Yeah, it's a long day.
It's a pretty crazy day.
I will say this though, man.
It's just nothing better than just getting the crew together and watching some football,
man.
I agree.
I mean, it's the reason why it's the most popular sport in America.
It's just and YouTube TV just makes it so fun because you can watch four games at once.
It's just, it's just you could, you always have something to talk about and some will say to see Sunday ticket
and being able to watch all the games drastically improves to Sunday. It's
there's nothing worse than being stuck with the two games that are on
that are just abysmal games.
Yeah, because now you're just watching like ESPN to see what's happening
in the good games.
So being able to go to all the games, it's a big bonus.
I'm with you, man.
Watching that.
What was it? We were watching the Baltimore game. Baltimore game.
Baltimore, Cincinnati. That was a frickin.
It's awesome. That was a bad.
Slower first half, but the second half was like bombs over Baghdad.
Dude, that Lamar.
We're going to probably get to it, huh?
I don't know. I don't know what he put in this rundown.
No, we're not. Dude, that Lamar touchdown where he broke like three stiff arm dns.
Stiff arm Hubbard and he's running, still rolling. I still thought him twice.
Hubbard came back from it and he keeps going. I'm like, dude, he's about, there's no way he's
about to throw it in the end zone. Yes, he is going to throw it in the end zone. And it was a dime right to Isaiah
Likely. I don't know how Isaiah likely was that open.
I mean, you can legitimately hold people.
I'm not going to lie.
I don't know.
I don't understand what we were doing as the.
You like tackle the gas.
And there were two guys over there.
Yeah.
They were just looking at them, which I mean, I guess, I probably would have been mesmerized
by the football bar was doing too.
Now that I think about it, I'm My man Burrow was throwing lights out too.
Dude, him and Jaser.
It was an old fashioned gunk.
Listen, they were talking about defense.
The whole first three to four weeks has been how the defenses are taking over the league.
Points are down all over the place.
I mean, grown men are crying about too high safety defenses and how we need to outlaw
them.
No Kuiper.
It's embarrassing.
He did go on around.
Yeah. Call him and stick the draft analysis, Mel.
And then Lamar and Joe Burrow go out there.
Is this the one baseball complains about the...
No, we need to wind the baseballs up a little bit.
We need more offense.
We do need to back the mound up. What?
I'm a big fan of backing the mound. You're Mel Kuiper right now. That's fine.
I'm not a baseball player, so I can be Mel Kuiper at baseball.
I get to be that now. That mound's distance was set when people were throwing
like 80 miles an hour. What? When that, that distance,
the last time they moved that mound back was like a time in baseball when
offensive production was struggling again.
They wanted more hits, they wanted more people on base, they wanted to make the game have
more action, so they moved the mound back.
They haven't moved it back in like, I don't know, I forget the dates, I'm not just going
to pull a number out of my ass, but it's been a long time.
The hitters have also gotten better. Yeah. I just think that they should move it back just a little bit.
They're outlawing the shift. They outlawed the shift. I think that's ridiculous. You should be
able to line up wherever you want. The shift?
You should be able to shift. Don't tell me I can't. Hit it over there. I think that was stupid.
I just moved the mound back. I guess that's probably closer to
the two-hight safeties thing. I just moved the mound back. I guess that's probably closer to the two high safeties thing.
That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah.
So what would be equivalent to baseball to move in the mound?
To football would be the kickoff.
It would be like if they if like
what they probably should do for kickers.
Kickers are making like 60 yarders like it's routine.
We need to narrow these field goal.
It's too easy to kick field goals.
We got to narrow.
We got to go to rugby. We got to narrow these field goal. It's too easy to kick field goals now. We
got to go to rugby goal posts. Kickers should not be influencing football games as much
as they are right now. Me and Connor Barwin said this like 10 years ago, we need to get
specialists out of the NFL. Specialists? Just kickers. So how is it supposed to win it at
the end? The freaking punter ruined the game. Everything's got to be a how was it? I was supposed to win it at the end.
The freaking punter ruined the game. Everything's got to be a Hail Mary now.
I don't know. It adds excitement to the game. Throw the ball through the uprights.
Why do we have to have this guy come out here and kick it?
That doesn't belong in the football field.
Make it tighter.
You just make it. He's got to just have a big one post.
You just got to hit the post. Hit the post. That's three points.
I don't want these guys going out there in soccer shoes and you can't touch them and we're make believe like this is a football play. Harry's won me a lot of football games man. Well yeah I'm sure you're pro kickers because you got a great kicker. Jake Elliott, shout out to Jake Elliott, he's a great kicker too. I just disagree with everything about it. Back to offenses not being dead. Rookies Jaden Daniels, Caleb Williams, and Bo Nicks each had 200 plus and big wins.
Big days for the rookies.
How about it, man?
And we were just, so we went to Andrew Santino's show.
Yeah.
And after the show.
Sigh time.
After the show, Santino being a Bears fan
asked me about Caleb Williams.
I'm like, I don't know, he doesn't look that good.
And then all of a sudden he goes out and plays like that.
I made sure to text Santino halfway through the game, hey, Caleb Williams looks pretty good today.
Yeah, exactly. Dude, him and Jaden Daniels both have the ability to extend the play.
For sure.
So I feel like with them, it's all about understanding the scheme and getting the ball
out in time and things like that and letting those extra,
you know, extended plays like come naturally. I think Caleb in the beginning was trying to do
a lot with the ball in his hands. Yeah, he wasn't confident.
Sometimes you just, you need to have a few of those games to get acclimated into the NFL and
now you realize what you can and cannot do. I mean, he's getting acclimated, the coaches are
getting used to what he's good at. And he can, I'm not,
I'm not going to say he was the team at USC,
but he had to do a lot at USC.
Sure.
And to feel like that in the NFL is fucking unfair.
He's got a lot of good weapons.
That's what I'm saying.
So it's like sometimes it's just letting,
let your guys do some work for you, man.
Yeah. Well, he was fine in DJing.
And he was absolutely, that's what he was doing.
He was throwing, he was slinging the thing around.
He looked more comfortable this week.
The O-line was, I mean, the Panthers were not offering much.
Yeah, sometimes you just need to, you know, get a little confidence booster.
Too. I don't know.
All I know is that some guys take a little bit more time to like feel more comfortable.
Obviously, this is he's been getting better.
Yeah. And whether that's him getting more comfortable, the coaches get more comfortable, he's been getting better. And whether that's him getting more
comfortable, the coaches get more comfortable, the offensive line playing better. It could be
a number of things. All I know is that it looked pretty good this past week. So hopefully they can
build on it. Their defense is rolling. I did not know they were three and two. I thought the Bears
were terrible. And then all of a sudden I look at the record and I'm like, they're a winning football
team? I forgot. That's the NFL for you. This is me, high level NFL
and analyst right here. I had primetime television, didn't even know the fucking Bears record.
I was like, I'm not paying attention and then they suck. And then all of a sudden it's like, oh hey,
I guess I got to watch the Bears now. Might be the best division in football.
That's my opinion Santino. In terms of record, I think they are the best division of football. I think that's right. Them, Minnesota, Lions and Green Bay, all of them are good.
Yeah.
Yeah. NFC North, I mean, is there anybody else that's even close?
I thought the AFC East was going to be good this year. They suck again.
Every time I think the AFC, I thought they were going to be great last year. And then like,
that's like, the Bills are even struggling now. All of a sudden they beat the breaks off of
Jacksonville. And now the last two years, the last two weeks, they Bills are even struggling now. All of a sudden they beat the brakes off of Jacksonville.
And now the last two years,
the last two weeks they've kind of calmed down.
Jacksonville found a way to get a dub.
Dougie P down there.
They did.
They got their first win.
Sometimes you just gotta get back on the tracks, baby.
That's right.
That's right.
Yeah. And Joe Flacco reached a top speed
of 18.76 miles per hour.
He was moving.
Moving. Yeah. The big man still got the
stride. Yes, he does. He's got long legs. Yeah. He's got some new shoes. I saw him on Pat McAfee.
He's got like coconut something or something. What the fuck they say about his shoes? Brandon,
can you get this? I'm looking. This is weird. I don't know. Yeah. Well, he also threw for 350
yards and three touchdowns. That's probably better than the 18 mile per hour run.
Yeah, I think the more impressive one, though, is the 18 mile per hour run,
because I just don't know too many 39 year olds that can do that.
Yeah. Yeah.
Not just 39, but 39 years that were not known for running previously.
He's never been known for being a runner. No.
Alec Pierce, former Bearcat, had a lot of those receiving cards.
How about it, huh?
Bearcats is making plays all weekend.
Yeah.
All weekend.
While the Bearcats were on a buy, coming back, baby.
Yeah, so it's good that the NFL offenses aren't dead because that makes for exciting games.
Definitely happy to see the production getting back up there.
Speaking of getting up there, let's get to the Giants
doing something that a lot of people have never seen before.
This is all over social media.
Giants in their win over the Seahawks, 29-20,
score a late minute fumble, a block kick for a touchdown.
The Giants jump over or jump through the A-gap.
Yeah.
19, who's 19?
Do you know 19?
Isaiah Simmons. Isaiah Simmons. Ball plays athletic as hell. Yeah, jumps through the a gap. Yeah. 19, who's 19? Do you know? Isaiah Simmons. Isaiah Simmons.
Ball plays athletic as hell. Yeah, jumps through the a gap. A lot of people didn't know you could
jump. You can jump in the NFL. It is a legal thing to jump. You're allowed to jump. You just
can't land on anybody or use yourself to propel upwards off of somebody, but you can indeed jump
on an NFL field.
Noted.
Randy Moss made a career out of it.
They also didn't know that you couldn't hold people down, which that is a little bit of
a gray area.
100%.
It's like there's one thing about yanking someone down.
You can't like grab and pull the person forward.
That's definitely against the rules.
I've seen that call.
That's holding. But if you are
just assisting somebody who's already going in a way, in other words, in order for you to not get
your ass kicked on field goal, you need to be as low as possible. So every line, what they do is
they get as low as possible and then rise on contact. So what the Giants did here is they just put their hands
on the O-lineman when they already went low themselves.
So that's not holding.
They just assisted them in going low.
Assisted, nice.
Assisted.
And then Simmons jumps through the A-gap.
Great timing.
One of the reasons you don't see this done as much
is because it's near impossible for the jumper
to time it that perfect.
To be able to jump, not touch any of the o linemen,
those two guys that get the whole,
or the assist on the o-line down,
and then to then land and then re-jump,
there's like a, and then the oper,
there's a million things that have to go right
for this to get pulled off.
Is there a world where they call this a penalty
and it's like, yeah, you can't do that.
Like in the future?
No, just like on this play.
Yeah, refs make mistakes all the time.
Oh, so you think it was completely like,
there's no like gray, like, oh, it could have went either way.
It just depends on like how they say
there's a hold on every play.
I don't think that this is illegal in any way.
Okay. Personally, keep this thing moving. Max Crosby shit talks.
The tap man. What? What?
He's got a lot of tattoos. It's a tap man. Oh, he is. He is.
He is tatted. Um, Max Crosby shit talk, uh, caught on broadcast.
How about it? Screaming Bo Nicks speak up.
They don't fucking know while Bo Nicks was audible thing.
On a third and four in the second quarter.
And I love a good shit talk. I do.
Is this just good coaching?
Because it did kind of look like at first, like everybody was waiting on
to figure out what was going on.
What do you mean? On the other side?
What do you mean is a good coaching? For Max.
For Max.
Max is coaching him up.
Max is on coaching?
Yeah.
It's good shit talking.
I mean, I think he's just observationally seeing that the O-line is like, what?
What are we doing?
There is some funny stuff that happens in the trenches.
There is confusion sometimes and sometimes you just say exactly what's happening
and you get this back and forth every once in a while.
He's like, just pull.
There are moments where it's like you don't have time.
Like you can't say like Chico Chico.
What was that Chico?
What? Pull.
Damn it.
Just in the fucking crossbar.
There was one, you know the radar defense
when they're like moving around
and you don't know where the down guys are or anything.
He was up there, the clock was moving.
He's like, just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him!
Just block him! Just block him! Just block him! Just block him! Just block him! I'm like, what the fuck is this? And he'll just tell me what it is. And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me.
I'm like, don't just fucking tell them.
Yeah, there'll be sometimes you're like playing a team.
You play a lot and you're trying to mess with them.
I'm like, where the fuck is this?
And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me.
I'm like, what the fuck is this?
And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me.
And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me.
And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me.
And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me. And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me. And then I'll look at the guy that's guarding me. I'm like, don't just fucking tell them. Yeah, there'll be sometimes you're like playing a team that you play a lot
and you're trying to mess with them.
I'm like, where the slides going to be like this.
I bet rip, rip, rip.
And he's like, what?
He's like, God damn it.
Now everybody knows you ruined it.
Oh, that locker room media policy.
Let's get to the real important stuff. And more important news around the league. The NFLPA has put out a statement about something
that they shouldn't be worried about at all. The NFLPA has put out a statement about moving
media interviews out of the locker rooms. And a lot of players have since spoken up
about this. This has been something that guys have talked about for a long time.
For those of you that don't know,
after games or practices,
there is a period of time that the locker room is open
for media members to go in and talk to players,
interview them, ask, you know, what happened in the game?
You know, what's going on this week?
Whatever stories they're writing.
There's no end to that.
That is me. Watch.
What? I don't think that that's why they're in there.
This is what is being alleged.
This is yeah, this is what I mean.
This is what is being alleged.
I suppose that there's probably been a few Peters gazed over the years.
Here's the statement the NFLPA is issued.
Tori Smith tweeted my good friend, Tori Smith, former teammate,
Super Bowl champion, Tori.
Way to speak up for the league.
Tori Smith, if only y'all knew how awkward some of the male reporters act.
Straight meat watchers.
I'm not going to lie.
I it is a little weird that people are in there, but I don't mind.
I never minded it.
You never mind.
Listen, somebody wants my my dick.
My dick is low on the totem pole. I'm not
impressing anybody or doing anything. If you want to look at it, go for it. Be my guest.
Thank God. Nothing... It's not going to impress you. It's going to be...
It's going to make some babies, man. It's what it's going to do.
It's efficient. It gets the job done. Especially making girls, but it's not... I don't know.
I've never cared. I've never cared.
I've never thought about it.
And I've never noticed anybody staring at it.
We've been in locker rooms our entire lives.
So it's like, I still remember going into the YMCA
and Cleveland Heights and seeing old man's balls
dragging on a sauna.
I didn't know that we were all of a sudden,
which is risky in two ways, man.
You can splinter those things.
Yeah. I remember it being visually and you can, you is risky in two ways, man. You can splinter those things. Yeah, I remember it being visually. And you can fucking, you can, you can sear those things.
I wasn't meatgating. You know how hard it is not to look at old man balls in a sauna? You can't
not look at those. There's nothing sexual about it, Tory. It's like how the hell are those things
hanging that low? He's got a point. Tory, man, I think this was an absolutely hilarious statement
and you know Twitter,
Twitter you can just have some fun on there.
Yeah, Kyle Yuschek also went out there on Twitter.
He said, maybe we can keep Grant Kahn,
I think that's how you pronounce this guy's name.
Sorry, Grant for this,
from always hanging out around lockers while we're changing.
So he directly, not only is calling out
the collective group of porters,
but Grant is catching strays here.
Apparently he has been known to...
Oh, God.
Shout out to juice, man.
I do think, I don't think this is
the problem that it's being made out to be.
It's so funny. I really honestly think guys just don't want to be interviewed in the locker room
and a lot of people are crying wolf right now to just try and get the reporters on the locker room.
Hey listen man, it sounds like everybody's having fun with it man.
I don't, yeah I'm just like, I don't think this is a big deal.
I never had an issue with it.
I think it's like, it's so easy to just not
show your dick to everybody.
Like, just put a towel on or go into the bathroom
that they aren't in.
Like, they're not in the showers.
Like, hey, how'd you catch that ball?
Like, you can definitely not show your dick if you don't want to guys.
It's not mandatory that your dick's out
while you're talking to these people.
I think it's actually encouraged.
Excuse me, lower your pants please.
I need to do my interview now.
What the fuck are we talking about?
I don't know what the problem is.
No, I've never had a problem with it.
But I think it's actually encouraged
by the NFL to be clothed.
I don't think they encourage you to be naked.
Can you please show me that tush push?
Reach down and touch your toes real quick.
I want to see what this looks like.
If you're self-conscious, there's definitely a way to not have your generals out.
Breaking NFL news, the Jets announced they have parted ways with the head coach Robert Salla because he was the issue.
After five games this season and a two and three record, the much maligned Jets offense struggling
and they fire their defensive coach. Jets, Jake, can we get your thoughts?
I'm here. I'm in the house. You are here, nice. You are our expert in the New York Jets comings and goings.
What are your thoughts on the departure of head coach Robert Salla?
Yeah, I mean, everything's going great.
This seems like a well-run organization, nothing going wrong.
It's crazy.
I mean, every year I get my hopes up and every year, five weeks into the season, I'm in the same damn place.
Yes. Are you familiar with the definition of insanity?
I've heard this once or twice.
Yeah. I you know, I love this team.
There's nothing I can do.
But, you know, maybe hiring a defensive head coach, forcing him to pick a quarterback
he didn't want, forcing him to fire the offensive coordinator, then hiring
a different offensive coordinator he didn't want forcing him to fire the offensive coordinator than hiring a different offensive coordinator. He didn't want then firing him because the offense sucked might not be a good
idea. Just my take. I'm dumb. I don't know football, but that's my thought. Well, you are right in
everything you just said. What is the, what do you think should be the next head coach of the New York
Jets? All right. So I got one name. I'm going to fix the organization. You guys are going to love it.
He's a Northeast Ohio boy.
Go get Mike Vrabel.
Call Mike Vrabel today.
Get him in the building.
That guy can run a program.
Listen, I don't hate that.
They need, I will say this.
I don't know that it's Robert.
Yeah, not right now.
I don't know that anybody's taking that job this year.
That doesn't feel like any, doesn't matter who they hire as the head coach.
The head coach is Aaron Rodgers.
I don't even know why they're not even just naming them the head coach.
I just want to see a player coach.
I do too, man. I kind of want to see.
I just want to see it.
Just make Aaron the head coach. Just do it.
You know you want to do it.
Everybody wants to see it.
What if he just fucking leads into the promised land?
It would be that would be fucking awesome.
Shut up, Jake.
You have any other thoughts from around the league you want to share while you have your
moment here?
Chitchick.
This nook is really sweet.
This is a good setup you got here.
We don't need that kind of comment.
We always ask him about NFL takes.
But thank you.
Yeah, well, I don't have those.
Thanks guys.
And lastly, it's time for the segment we debuted last week.
Coach quote of the week.
It's a good segment.
A little context for this quote.
During the Broncos Raiders game, cameras caught Bo Nix and Sean Payton
going at it on the sideline.
Yeah, I think we can tell from body language.
Sometimes coaches like this.
Howard Mudd used to purposely get guys riled up just to see if they would like
tell him you're wrong coach. He played mind games like that. Yeah. I think it's
kind of fucked up but I respect it. I mean we want to talk about the best to do
it ever. Tom Brady used to fucking get pissed on the sideline. Yeah. He showed some
aggression. Listen I don't have a problem with showing emotion and it
seems like Sean Payton doesn't have a problem with it either.
Post game, Sean Payton asked about this moment, said, there's still a little bit of Ferris
Bueller in this player that we're trying to get rid of.
Hold on.
What does that mean?
I fucking love Ferris.
I got a little Ferris Bueller.
I mean, what's wrong with that?
You should ever get rid of Ferris Bueller.
What's wrong with skipping school?
Yeah.
Skipping school and stealing cars.
What's wrong with skipping school? Yeah. Skipping school and stealing cars. What's wrong with that?
If Bo Nix is Ferris, does that make Sean Payton principal?
The principal.
Yeah.
What's his name?
Rooney.
Principal Rooney.
Thank you, Brandon.
Yeah.
Does that make Sean Payton principal?
Because Principal Rooney is the bad guy in the movie.
Yeah.
I don't.
If you watch that movie, Ferris Bueller is the good guy.
Yeah.
He's who you're rooting for.
Yeah.
Ferris Bueller is the coolest fucking character
in pretty much any movie I've ever seen.
Keep fighting authority.
Authority figures suck.
Principal Rooney sucks.
Keep beating you.
You're the good guy in this.
Don't forget, everybody loves Ferris Bueller.
Nobody likes Principal Rooney.
But also have a good relationship with your coach.
Also listen to Sean Payne. He's been a really good coach for a long time.
Oh, and then one last quote. Cowboys beat the Steelers on a last second Dak touchdown to Jalen Tolbert.
Good play right there. Good play to end here. Here is Smith on the game winning touchdown pass from Dak Pred Scott to Jalen Tolbert. Bro, it was miraculous.
JT literally sprained his fucking nuts.
Excuse me, sorry guys.
Sprained his nuts the play before,
then comes back, makes the game winner, unbelievable.
I love that he thought saying fucking
was the worst part of this statement.
Dude, swear jar.
Fuck, sorry guys, sorry I forgot I'm not supposed to say.
He sprained his nuts.
What does that even mean?
Can you spray your nuts?
I think, I don't know.
I know, you know what you can do.
I've never heard of that one.
You know what you can do, you can twist your nuts.
You can twist your nuts.
It's called testicular torsion.
Yeah, you can also.
Which by the way, is a hospitable,
like I'll never forget a center for Cleveland Heights
and he had to go to the emergency room.
You can die.
That's how important testicles are kids.
Which is why if you see an old man in a sauna,
do not twist them things.
Because they are very twistable.
They were droopy.
They're day.
There's some sad nuts down low.
They have seen a lot of gravity through the years and they are prone
to detorsion. That skin got a little loose as he got older. One would only assume they were not
fresh out looking like that. Thank you Tyler Smith for cleaning up that quote and making it safe for
the kids watching. Kids watch your nuts. That does it for week five roundup. Let's get to some no dumb
questions. Before we get out of here, letup. Let's get to some no dumb questions before we get out of here
Let's wrap up the show with some no dumb questions because there's no such thing as dumb questions
Just dumb people no dumb questions is brought to you by the powerful backing of American Express
What was the bit that we did about American Express? Don't steal home without it. That's right. Don't steal home without
Shout out to the guards baby this gold man from Lacey Amos
Hey new height show. What's the story with the T.
Kelsey T.
Rex logo on the inside of his gloves?
Well, Travis.
I would like to know this question and answer as well.
Yeah. Well, the gloves are custom from Nike and Nike asked me.
From Nike. Yeah, from Nike.
And they asked me if if I want to throw a logo in there.
And I guess when I was a kid, you say it best when you say you don't choose your own nicknames.
I was given the nickname T-Rex when I played low post basketball and when I was like 10
years old.
Okay.
Why were you nicknamed T-Rex?
It's a good question.
I think T for Travis and T-Rex was like kind of like a mind frame, like a mindset.
It sounds like a little kid. Yeah. Or it was because I was just like fat with short arms.
Why have I never heard this before? I don't know. It was that in traveling,
Trav. Have you heard traveling? I did not hear traveling. That's not anything.
And it's not because I was traveling all over the world.
It was because I did not want to put that basketball on the board.
It's not because I was Carmen Sandiego.
It was because I did not like to dribble.
I wasn't a dribbler at all.
Who does?
You and LeBron James.
Well, I mean, back in the day, it was traveling.
Nowadays, I would have, I could probably have made it to the NBA.
You know what?
I used to think there is no chance in hell, but the more I see how close in height you are
to some of these guys.
And you think height is the,
I thought that was a deep,
height isn't the difference.
Dude, Steph Curry is an outlier.
Just cause he can shoot like threes from mid court,
height is a big deal
and whether you can make it to the NBA.
Steph Curry is like six four.
I know. That's what I'm saying.
He's short.
So when you like you're 6'5".
I didn't think you had the height necessary to play in the low post.
Oh no, I definitely didn't.
Yeah.
But then I see you next to Luca and you're the same fucking height as the guy.
So you could have done it.
I think you legitimately might have had a chance to do it.
I don't think I would have been an NBA superstar and all-star or anything, but I think I could have done it. I think you legitimately might have had a chance to do it. I don't think I would have been an NBA superstar, an all-star or anything, but I think I could have made it.
I think you might have been. Especially with them lateral moves, that helps you on the basketball court
rather than it does the NFL court. Listen, fast break. You want me on the fast break.
Unless you have to travel. No, no, no. I'm gonna catch that. I'm gonna get the rebound, start the fast break.
Got it. Where I traveled was like on the wing trying to keep on.
Fuck.
I love that maneuver.
Alright, well there you go Lacey Amos.
Next note of the question.
It's a childhood nickname that I like to really embrace the mentality of a T-Rex on the field.
I think that's where I was going with.
T-Rex on a field, I think you're the exact opposite of a T-R with. T-Rex, man. T-Rex on a field. I think
you're the exact opposite of a T-Rex. T-Rex, bad vision. Although they see objects that
move. So maybe when you saw a P-Ryn moving, then you're like, oh, T-Rex. You don't have
short arms either. I don't get that. Your arms are long. At least average for your height.
I think it was just a nickname from when I was younger. Next No Dumb question, Joe Cunningham,
1937. No Dumb question, what happened to the shout outs?
Nobody is taking their game to New Heights this year?
Bummer.
Very passive aggressive there from you, Joe.
Yeah, you want to bring it back?
I guess, well, Joe wants it back.
All right, you got a shout out?
You got a New Heights stamp of the week?
You got a stamper?
I'll give Alec Pierce some love.
He almost single-handedly,
along with Joe Flacco, had the Colts come back this week. They didn't quite get it done, but he
had some long catches late. He's been having a good year. Alec Pierce been having a real good
year. He's been having a good career so far. He's been doing his thing over there in Indy.
There we go. All right, who you going with? Who am I going with? Yeah.
I'll give my stance to my guy, Juju Smith Schuster. Hey, that's a good one.
Niner, man.
He's out there ballin' right now.
He is, he is.
It's a heck of a welcome back into the starting lineup.
Yes, sir.
And that does it for No Dumb Questions,
brought to you by the powerful backing of American Express.
Yes, sir.
And that also wraps up this episode of New Heights.
Make sure you're subscribed on YouTube
to the New Heights channel,
and follow New Heights on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Reminder, you can listen to new episodes of New Heights early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus and the Wondery app or on Apple Podcast.
You will also be able to see the exhilarating review of women and mobile pants.
women and mobile pants.
Hope you like it. Once again, New Heights is a Wondry show produced by Wave Sports and Entertainment. Follow the show on all social media, at New Heights Show with 1S. Thanks to you to our
production and crew and thank you to the 92%ers. We will see you later.
Oh, nice little boulevard wheat. Shout out to Creed Humphrey.
Oh, come on.
Who taught him this and why?
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
That's pretty good party trick.
It's physics.
Come on, get off.
Get up off the palm.
I don't have to.
Shout out to boulevard wheat though. That is one of my favorite blondies. It's physics. Come on, get off. Get up off the palm. I don't have to.
Shout out to Boulevard Weto. That is one of my favorite blondies. Follow New Heights on the Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen to new episodes of New Heights early and ad free right now
by joining Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.
And before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondery.com
slash survey.
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