Newcomers: Scorsese, with Nicole Byer and Lauren Lapkus - Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (w/ Scott Aukerman)

Episode Date: March 5, 2024

This week, Lauren and Nicole dive into Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice - Ultimate Edition, which has approximately 30 more minutes of action-packed Ben-Affleck-as-Batman heroism to dissect than the non-ultimate edition! Extra special guest Scott Aukerman (Mr. Show, Between Two Ferns, Comedy Bang! Bang!, Threedom) provides beyond helpful background knowledge on the commonalities between Superman and Batman’s mothers, Jesse Eisenberg’s probable acting inspiration for Lex Luther, and why Superman is so hot. Follow Scott: Instagram, TwitterNext week's movie: The Lego Batman Movie (2017)Like the show? Rate Newcomers 5 stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts and leave a review for Nicole and Lauren to read on the pod!Follow the podcast on Letterboxd.Advertise on Newcomers via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Original. Master Wayne. Thermal imaging is showing me two dozen hostiles on the third floor. Why don't I drop you off on the second? I'm getting slow in my old age, Alfred. Even you got too old to die young. Not for lack of trying. He has the power to wipe out the entire human race. If we believe there's even a 1% chance that he is our enemy,

we have to take it as an absolute certainty. The greatest gladiator match in the history of the world. God versus man. Day versus night. You're psychotic. That is a three syllable word for any thought too big for little minds. Do you know the oldest lie in America? That power can be innocent. The The The The

The The The The The The The The

The The The Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice Ultimate Edition. Well, that was perfect. I'm Lauren Lapkus. I'm Nicole Byer. And this season we're covering the Batman movies.

This is the 10th episode of the sixth season, so we've already done so many of these. We're working our way through movies within the Batman universe with the help of fellow newcomers, super fans, sometimes even people who've contributed. This season will be 13 episodes culminating in a very exciting live, live, live stream episode. Oh my God, it's going to be so crazy. We're going to cover as much as we can to give you an overview of the franchise but listen we can't get to everything so today we're going to be discussing the second film in the dc extended universe batman v superman dawn of justice ultimate edition okay and if you want to watch it it's uh with a subscription you can watch it on max and prime video you can also watch it for a fee on apple tv plus google play and voodoo and we're gonna spoil the fuck out of this. So if you want to watch this

hot fucking mess before we do so, you can do that. And we are so excited for our guest today. Scott Aukerman is a comedian, writer and producer who co-founded the Earwolf Podcast Network. Scott hosts the comedy podcast Comedy Bang Bang and Freedom with me and Paula Tompkins. Welcome back, Scott. Hi, guys. Hi. We're so excited to talk about Batman v. Superman, Dawn of Justice Ultimate Edition with you today. This is one that I'm afraid, I had a little bit of input on what movies

I think you're covering this season. I had a conversation with Lauren where I heard what you were covering and I was like, no, no, no, here's how you do it. I crossed out some and added some. And this is one that I'm afraid I said we need to watch the ultimate edition and not the regular. Oh, so this is all your fault. Yeah.

I'm sorry. No, no, this is good to know that we have you here. Three hours and three men, by the way. Yes. The original theatrical is only 2.30, so it's just 30 more minutes. But I think 30 more minutes that makes it make slightly more sense well and it makes you really tired by the end because I really I was nodding off

I was holding on for dear life just to get through the last few minutes I woke up to the screen being like just like the cover of the movie and then I went what and then I had only been asleep you had to go backwards I had to go back and then I had to watch the last five minutes again but i got

what happened okay and i can't wait to talk about it so scott you're a marvel head you like marvel i like marvel but i made me enjoy dr strange and then we had a great conversation about that at birds when i was walking home from the hollywood bowl for reason, because I couldn't get an Uber. Are you a DC head too? I actually grew up, I think, reading both pretty equally. But DC was always a little more childish, I think, until the mid 80s. It was a little more like for kids. And then in the mid 80s, they sort of grew up and got a little more for people my age, teens at the time. So that's when The Dark Knight and Watchmen and all that kind of stuff came out. So now it's like it's so weird because DC movies are they curse in them and they're so violent.

And they're not for kids at all. And DC has gone the totally other way, whereas Marvel is more lighthearted, you know? Yeah, the swearing actually really surprised me. Did you notice that yeah I did a little Batman at one point he considers changing his name to cunt man and he just keeps screaming and doing the like pussy licking thing

it was so weird but I like that part very strange there was one hot part do you agree the shower the bathtub oh the bathtub I thought you meant the shower where i was well batman is taking a bear-ass shower i thought he was going to turn around and gone girl as soon as she was wang i didn't even catch that oh my god you were asleep during the shower scene i

swear to god i was watching um the bathroom scene was hot i don't remember a shower yeah are you making this up i think maybe this is something that I saw. It's not just a fantasy. I mean, I always think about Ben Affleck standing in the shower a la Gone Girl. Yes. Okay, well, really quickly, let's just give our quick one to two sentence experience of the film. We're going to jump in it very deeply, but did you like this movie? So I did not like it in the theater when i saw the theatrical cut

i thought it was a mess yeah uh saw the extended cut and was like oh okay now at least i know what's going on i still think it's a mess yeah but i at least understand it okay i felt like i was really confused um about a lot of stuff but I really was like, why are Batman and Superman against each other? They should be fighting together. And so then there was a lot there that I felt like didn't match up with what we've watched in other films. I also felt like Batman himself was very different from what we've established him to be. Yes, this is an older. Essentially, what happened with this is Zack Snyder has read two comic books in his life.

He read Watchmen and he read The Dark Knight. And at the end of The Dark Knight, which is a big classic Frank Miller Batman story set with an older Batman, who's like I think he's 65 in The Dark Knight. They page him down to like

Affleck looks 55 maybe in this. He's got a gray streak. But at the end of that, Batman and Superman have a big fight, which was something you'd never seen before. Yeah. Because growing up, Batman and Superman were friends. They were always colleagues. They helped each other out. That was my understanding.

Yes. So in The Dark Knight, in this alternate universe set in the future with an older Batman and Superman hasn't aged, Superman is like a tool of the fascist government. He's like Ronald Reagan government. Okay. And is controlling the world and keeping peace. And Batman doesn't like that. And so they have a giant fight, which is what Zack Snyder wanted. Like when he was making this sequel to the first Superman film, he really just wanted to film this fight which is what you see at

the two hour point of the movie that's that's what he wanted to do so that's that's why this movie exists and everything in it is backtracking to justify this fight happening isn't that such a boy answer though like i just wanted to see him fight i want to see him well that's i think the issue with zach snyder as a director is there are two types of comic book fans. I think there are comic book fans who are like they're all power fantasies. Right. But the comic book fan sees a power fantasy and says like, OK, these characters are very powerful and it would be great to have all these powers. But if I had them, I would use them to help out the less fortunate.

Yeah. And that's like classic Spider-Man. With great power comes great responsibility. Zack Snyder is the other type of comic book fan. Is that the one that I thought was a Bible quote? Yes, I believe so. Job 318. I was like, that's famous, right?

That's from the Bible. That's famous. But then people online are like, it is kind of like, I feel like I got justified by somebody. I don't know. Whoever helped me out, thank you. But then the Zack Snyder type of comic book fan is the type who sees these power fantasies and goes like, it'd be so awesome to be that powerful and to kick everyone's ass. Oh, yeah. Right?

And that's the whole, and I don't think that's sustainable. Oh, yeah. Right? And that's the whole, and I don't think that's sustainable. That's the whole issue of Zack Snyder's whole point of view is he views these characters as like gods who are out there beating the shit out of everyone into submission and not helping people. Yeah, I didn't like that. Like, I didn't like Superman's red eyes. Nicole, what did you think of the movie more? I also didn't like Superman's red eyes.

I didn't like superman's red eyes i just i felt like okay maybe i just really loved christian bale and i like ben affleck but he just seemed so angry and mean and alfred seemed like he was giving advice and then ben would just be like no and then wouldn't do it and then today alfred yeah yeah truly like get out of here and then everyone just seemed so angry at each other and then i was like how is amy adams everywhere all at once oh my god the her miles must be i know incredible she's getting those steps in i love her though but i yeah but they're even the part where like she's falling off the building and then superman catches her and she's just like, you almost died.

You didn't know he was going to be there. I had some questions about her character and her feelings. And then Laurence Fishburne, I was like, is he doing soliloquies? Is he doing poetry? Everything he said was kind of softly rhyming. He was cast because this is the sequel to the first Superman film that Zack Snyder did. That's an issue, because I didn't understand that. Which you guys don't need to cover, but you haven't seen.

Yeah. So that was a Superman film that was a result of the Dark Knight movies that you just watched, the Nolan movies. Christopher Nolan's an executive producer on that movie. And the Batman movies that you guys just did cover, the Nolan movies, I think what those are is like, what if Batman existed in the real world? There's nothing super powered about it. There's nothing supernatural about it. It's just like, okay, we're going to justify Batman. Even the Joker, he doesn't fall into a vat of acid or anything. He does that to himself. So it was kind of when they announced okay this superman

movie is going to happen with zach snyder everyone's kind of like zach snyder i don't know but nolan was the executive producer and it was kind of like okay well maybe this will be a superman movie like what if the one buy you have is there's an alien yeah but what if that was the real world but he does it to the extreme of um and this ties in with the beginning of this movie, these aliens are fighting and Superman normally in a Superman movie would see the villain about to kill a bunch of people and would go like, okay, I have a solution for this and save everyone, right? Zack Snyder does not care about that at all. So these villains are murdering thousands and thousands of people and Superman is just cool with it, I guess. Yeah.

He's just fighting and it's like another 9-11, basically. Yeah, I know. It was really scary. Yes. People are being

slaughtered everywhere. And what year was this? This was 2009, I think. Because doesn't it seem incensed to make that? Or 2012 or so? I feel like all those buildings thought it was

like, this is horrible. And then I didn't like the little girl who was like, my mom's up there. And I was like, why aren't you in school? And she's literally outside your mom's building. That girl's mom is gone. Her mom is gone. And then did Superman... We gotta get into

this because there's so many questions that I have and I want to get into all the details. Let's take a quick break. We're gonna to jump back in with all of Batman v Superman, Dawn of Justice Ultimate Edition, okay? If you're wondering what a NordVPN is, I'll tell you. VPN stands for Virtual Private Network, a service that protects your internet connection and online privacy. A VPN creates an encrypted tunnel for your data, protects your online identity by hiding your IP address, and allows you to use public Wi-Fi hotspots safely. I'm using a Nord VPN myself.

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Nord's 30-day money-back guarantee. Link is in the episode description. Um, we're back. We're back. This film was released march 19th 2016 there we go written by chris terrio and david s goyer and directed by zach snyder was did david s goyer write another he did something else oh okay yeah okay ah he wrote all of the nolan ones i think our co-wrote i he's a pretty standard go-to guy for these comic films okay well like let's jump into the plot of this because all of our questions and thoughts are going to be tangentially yes popping off of here so we want to thank sincerely the dc extended universe thank you so much for putting together this summary and that's not the the Batman wiki. That's the DC Extended Universe wiki. The DC Extended Uni.

Thank you so much. Now again, right off the bat, I was going, are we really doing this? In a flashback to his childhood, Bruce Wayne runs from his parents' funeral. He falls into a cave

where a swirling vortex of bats elevates him back to the surface. I did like that. How many times have you guys seen his parents being murdered? We watched the whole thing of him. At least five times. I did like that. How many times have you guys seen his parents being murdered? We watched the whole thing of him. At least five times. I was like,

why? No one in the world doesn't know. No one in the world. I was trying to think, though, how many times it's been on film because it sort of happens in the Michael Keaton first one, right? I feel like it's like,

I think we've seen it four or five times. It's in that cartoon that we watched, right? Oh, it's in the cartoon. Okay. Yes. It's in the Bale version. Is it in the Bale? I was trying've seen it four or five times. It's in that cartoon that we watched, right? Oh, it's in the cartoon. Okay. Yes. It's in the Bale version. Is it in the Bale?

I was trying to remember it. Yeah, that's the best one. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, we liked that first one. Batman Begins. Oh, you didn't like the second one? We liked the first one a lot. We liked the second one.

We liked Heath Ledger. And then the third one, I thought should have been two movies. I thought it could have been good, but a lot happens. A lot happens. Yeah, yeah. It's very long. Yeah. should have been two movies i thought it could have been good but a lot happens a lot yeah yeah it's very long but yeah um we we've had to watch this origin story 500 times and i just feel like literally as someone who doesn't know anything i know that his parents are killed in front of him so yes but this one was done pretty artistically he had the gun between those pearls then the

pearls that's all i remember is the dark knight Which is one of the only comics I think Zack Snyder's ever read. That's where the. This distinction is very important. He only read that one. I know more than he does. Those are the two like big famous comics that made everyone in the 80s go like, whoa, comics are serious. Right. So everyone's read those.

But that's one of the big famous scenes in the Dark Knight is you flashback to this and the pearls I think were introduced in that. The pearls going everywhere. So that's why Zack Snyder is like, I want to film that. But I feel like then Batman should be obsessed with pearls. Yeah, he should be a pearl man. He should love a pearl necklace. He's a pearl man. That's cool. That's a cool costume.

There's a big controversy about that because pearl necklaces have little knots around. Keeping them. Exactly. It wouldn't happen. Unless it was fake. And I guess his parents weren't rich after all. They weren't that rich.

I guess they were in a little bit of debt. Okay, daddy bought her a fake pearl. Let's jump in again. So in the present day, Bruce Wayne, Ben Affleck, arrives in Metropolis in the midst of the battle between Superman, Henry Cavill, who's hot, and the Kryptonians. He tries to proceed to Wayne Tower, giving the order for people to evacuate. As he drives his way to the building, he... And this was crazy.

He's driving there. I didn't understand. In a Jeep. I was wondering where he'd get his Jeep from. He's like, oh, can't go that way. Everything's falling that way. Can't go that way. I was like, you're not doing this right.

As he drives his way to the building, he narrowly avoids the debris from the crashing fortress of solitude with superman and zod michael shannon inside so this is from the first movie this is the the big the third act of the previous superman movie oh that's what's happening that's what's happening is is superman comes down to earth he's trying to hide himself from the world and then suddenly these other Kryptonians, Zod and everyone come down and they're going to enslave all of Earth. And they have this battle which just decimates cities all over the world.

And thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of people die. Oh my God. And then Superman is going to kill Zod. And at the last minute, it doesn't or something like that. But it was very, it's unlike any other Superman movie because just the destruction level. And yeah, it's realistic. But who wants to see that? I don't know.

No, it was, it's honestly very scary. And Superman in general, Zod begin to fight. Zod throws Superman into Wayne Tower and Zod's uncontrollable heat vision causes the building to collapse. Bruce makes his way through the debris looking for survivors finding Wallace Keefe, Scoot McNary trapped under some rubble. That whole scene I was like this is a little silly. I feel like everybody

being upset, there was something weird about it. I don't know. There was just something weird about the whole thing. Weird about people being upset that this was happening? He was like, I can't feel my legs. I was like, I don't feel. I, I just didn't, there was just something weird about the whole thing. Weird about, about people being upset that this was happening? Cause he was like, I can't feel my legs. And I was like,

I don't feel like you really can't. Like, I don't know. Like there was something. What? Wait, you thought the actor really couldn't? It wasn't even acting.

It wasn't like I was blaming the acting. It's like, I'm just going like, there's something about the tone that there's not a level of severity that feels real. Yeah. Everything's falling. He was just like, my legs. Oh no, my legs. I was like, you would be

screaming in pain. There would be other people screaming. But I wanted more I wanted more like screaming terror. It didn't really feel, I feel like even the kids walking through were like, oh no. I mean, there was a lady that was like, hold hands.

And I was like, what? What do you mean hold hands it was like building just fell down if you were leading those children you would be running for your life like bye kids like you guys hold hands figure it out and then he okay he helps rescue him and then he saves the little girl whose mother has perished and while consoling her he angrily watches zod and superman fly down from the sky now i literally thought superman was carrying um what's his name batman's boss or no his employee batman is a boss you know who he calls on the phone he's like get out of there and then that guy doesn't leave for some fucking crazy reason why was he just alone and he was like may god help me i thought superman was flying holding that businessman i was like like, why did he save him? Who cares?

I think that's like the head of Wayne Enterprises or whatever and he's stayed behind to make sure everyone's gotten out. It's not a good idea. Someone tells you

to leave the building. Oh yeah, I'd be first. I'd be like elbowing everyone out of the way. He said we gotta go and you're already five floors down.

Did you hear me? Okay, whatever. But also, it's what in this book William Goldman wrote, he calls hero shit or like hero business.

If you are writing for the hero of the movie in a realistic situation, Ben Affleck doesn't have to drive to the thing in order to make a phone call. This guy doesn't have to be last

but everyone every actor wants to look like they're doing something heroic so it's like why in king kong that adrian brody like drives around trying to chase king kong in a car for the entire third act it's like if you have a hero you want to see them doing something heroic even though it doesn't make sense that's true i mean it's more exciting than seeing him call from his house. Yeah. Yeah. Collect. But I just didn't get why. 1-800-COLLECT May I get Wayne Enterprises please?

So 18 months later two divers in the Indian Ocean When Mike joined later in watching I was like and then 18 years later 18 years? So a long time later they discover a large rock that looks similar to the Kryptonian ships at the site of the destroyed

world engine upon taking it back to the surface they split the rock revealing a glowing green crystal I was like who the fuck are these people I know I was kind of interested in their story I was like can we watch the movie where these guys just like fish in the Indian Ocean? It seems really interesting. Did you guys know what the Green Rock was when you saw it? I did know

that it was Kryptonite. Okay. I figured that's what it was. Okay. Lois Lane. Didn't get that that was her name until a little bit later. Nope. Amy Adams. Like literally she goes to her mailbox and says, Lane. I go, thank you. I was like, oh, that's you. Lane Bryant.

Travels to war-torn nai romi seeking an interview with the african warlord in a raging civil war lois is accompanied by jimmy olsen michael cassidy a photographer who's revealed to be a cia operative some people are by the way very upset that zach snyder uh introduces j introduces Jimmy Olsen and then immediately kills him. Oh. Because Jimmy Olsen's like a big famous part of the case. He's like number four on the call sheet in Superman movies. And he wasn't in the first Superman movie. And then they introduce him and we're like, oh, Jimmy Olsen finally.

And then he's dead. But don't people always kind of like that? Like when something's like surprising, surprising, like it's like, oh, it's the famous person. That's one of the things that you can say about these movies is they're making weird choices that you've never seen in a Superman movie to its detriment, I think, but it's always interesting. Yeah, it's fun.

I didn't know what was going to happen the entire time. Yeah, I didn't know who Jimmy Olsen was. And you didn't know what was happening the entire time. And I never knew when it was done. Sure you didn't. The camera he was carrying has a tracking device hidden inside and is discovered by a bodyguard

Anatoli Kinozev. Kalen Mulvey? Before being shot, Jimmy's, I mean, these are names I'm trying to say. Why do you even bother?

I don't even know. You're doing great. You could have not even. Well, I tried. Okay. And I think that's something. You did. It was great.

It was better than what I do. I like it. Jimmy states that Lois knew nothing of either device or his identity. The warlord then takes Lois as a hostage. Superman soon arrives, saves Lois, and returns her home. What did you think of Superman saving Lois in the way he just pulverizes that guy? I did like that, where she was like, she's holding on because she's about to be killed.

And she then, they kind of have a little nod between them. She lets go and then he just runs really fast into that guy. And just, if he did do that, he, yeah, the body parts would go flying everywhere. And she's fine. She had no like speed problem. Like it didn't matter that he hit that guy and she was just standing there. Like if someone was like sort of holding on to you. Yeah.

And a big thing. Train hit them. Yeah big train hit them, you'd be injured. You might move a little. Just a little. She was ready for it. Here's the thing. But it's romantic, right? Why did this scene happen? I guess what we're getting-

What we're getting to is everyone's going to- The world is sort of on Superman's side at the end of the first Superman movie because he saved everyone. But there was all this destruction. We're getting to the world turning against Superman. So there Superman is being framed for all these people dying in this scene. It's good that you interrupted me because I was going to say something wrong. What were you going to say? I was like, I think what we're getting to is like showing their relationships so that we can see that they're a couple.

And she's like really she's a really good reporter. That as well. That is also something we got from that. But not the big point. Okay, so a U.S. Senate committee headed by Senator Finch, Holly Hunter. I love her.

I love her. I love how she talks. I love it. It's so great. Pig fish. Literally Superman. Superman. I love how she talks. I love it. It's so great. It's all about the pig fish. Literally, Superman should be seen by the public. Superman, I'm going to make some choices about him. I love it. Her voice is so great. Here is evidence about Superman saving the life of Lois Lane in Africa.

Concerned at how Superman may be seen by the public due to his constant acts of vigilantism, she sends a public announcement to Superman, inviting him to speak in a committee to defend his actions at the U.S. Capitol in Washington, D.C. This whole storyline I felt was boring. Yes. I did not need this at all. I don't care about the political issues regarding Superman. I do believe in the original version, they cut it down.

But then things just happen like scoot mcnary blowing up and stuff where you're like what is happening i don't understand what's going on this this at least i can follow but you're right it is very boring yeah it felt it felt just like you you don't need any of that stuff because at the end of the first movie there's all this destruction you can like start this movie with everyone going like, yeah, Superman, he saved us, but... Not all of us. But everyone died. Is he really good?

And we're already there. Wait, sorry if this was said. Who's attacking the aliens? Zod. Attacking what? The city. At the beginning? Yeah.

Yeah, it's these other Kryptonians who find Earth. Okay, they are aliens. Okay. At the beginning? Yeah. Yeah, it's these other Kryptonians who find Earth. Okay. They're as powerful as Superman, and their whole mission is like, we're going to enslave Earth. They weren't raised by the nice American Midwesterners with American values who raised Superman to be a good guy.

And why does he look like an attractive human species? Yeah, why is he so hot? And then they all look like aliens. It's very crazy. Like, if you watch the Christopher Reeve Superman movies, he does such a good job

because he's not incredibly built. He worked out. He's got muscles. But he does such a... He's such a good actor. He does such a good job in slouching

and playing Clark Kent like a dweeb. Oh. This guy... The whole time I'm going the glasses are not... All he does is he puts on glasses and he's still the most handsome man you've ever seen. Yeah, you can tell who he is. And he's actually hotter

with the glasses, I know. I think so. At the end when it's like Superman's dead and then they turn to page six and it's like Clark Kent also died. I couldn't believe it. I thought it would be so funny to have those next to each other and it's just one picture of Superman without the glasses and one picture of Clark Kent with the glasses. Two guys died. I thought it would be so funny to have those next to each other. And it's just one picture of Superman without the glasses and one picture of Clark Kent with the glasses. Two guys died.

That's crazy. Two separate guys. And doesn't he take off his glasses to go to sleep? Well, I guess Lois knows. Lois knows. In the first movie, she figures it out immediately. Okay, good. We need her to be smart. So returning home to his and Lois' apartment, the hot things happen. She's naked. She's naked in the tub. Clark and Lois' apartment, the hot things happen. Yeah, she's naked.

She's naked in the tub. Clark sees Lois in the bathtub and says he wanted to surprise her by cooking up something. And when the subject shifts to the controversy surrounding his actions in Nairobi, Clark makes it clear that he is unconcerned as Lois could have been killed. Also adding that he didn't murder anyone. When Lois questions whether or not it's possible for him to love her and be Superman, he responds by getting in the tub with her, despite being fully clothed, kissing her passionately

before his glasses come off, and then Clark then proceeds to take off his shirt. I like that the wiki put in... That's a lot of detail for 20 seconds. That's the best part. And then he took off his shirt and then they fucked. They fuck in the tub and they had a nice time.

They definitely did, but they didn't let us see it. She just put the glasses back on. Wasn't it cute when he got it in his clothes? It's so fun. It's like rom-com. It's like, I want more. I want more. More rom-com. Less death and destruction.

Meanwhile, in Gotham, the vigilante Batman rescues a group of young Asian women from sex trafficker Cesar Santos, Sebastian Sozi, by subduing him, then ruthlessly branding him. I was like, wait a minute. What the fuck? I was like, why did Batman brand him? Why are we doing this?

Then I was like, did he really do that? Here's what they're doing. And it's very subtle. And if you don't know what is like the comic books it's based on, you'll miss it. But they need a reason for Batman and Superman to fight. They need a reason for Superman to be mad at Batman as well as Batman. So they've already established why Batman's mad at Superman. They need a reason for Superman to be mad at Batman.

And so what they have set up is this is a Batman who's in his 50s in kind of the future where the Joker has killed Robin. OK, so there are little clues to that in the movie, but that happens in the comics. That happened actually in the comics was the Joker killed one of the Robins. that happened actually in the comics was uh the joker killed one of the robins um and so that has sent batman down a dark path where he's just brutal and he's no longer the good guy batman who's saving people he's like branding criminals and he's turning into a fascist who uh is is what you know the power fantasy of it all is is like beating poor people what, you know, the power fantasy of it all is like beating poor people into submission, you know, which is what Batman, the two different takes on Batman are,

I have all these powers and I'm super rich and I'm going to use all that to help the less fortunate. Or I'm super rich and crime has scarred me so much, I'm going to beat the shit out of poor people. And I think that's where he's veering into in this. It's just so crazy because i'm like we like the character for the fact that he doesn't harm he i mean he harms people but he doesn't he doesn't he doesn't try to kill them yeah and yes so they're they're that's where they want to get

to in the next movie yeah is batman's back to being the batman we like okay but they need a reason for superman to be back uh to be bad at batman so he'll punch him so that's what they're doing is they're setting up this fascist batman who is has gone too far with his means of justice all right i'll let them do it this time second time is a spanking i'm gonna get you um yeah uh yeah so one of Gotham's police department rookies tries to shoot him but he leaves and then leaving Santos with a bat brand on his chest

on the morning news while cooking Clark hears an Iromian Kahina Ziri being interviewed regarding Superman and she states that she that had Superman been in her presence she would ask him how he decides which lives count and which do not, leaving Clark visibly disturbed. I mean, it is a good question because,

you know, if Superman did exist, people always go, well, how do you decide who to save? And there have been comics that sort of deal with that where Superman can kind of go crazy going like, I can't even sleep because I know some people are going to die while I sleep and I have the power to save them. I don't think comics are meant to get that realistic necessarily when you're dealing with Superman and Batman who are just like, we just want to see these guys saving lives and doing it in interesting ways, you know? But they've already set up this first Superman movie where so many people died. That's where they're getting to is like the public turning against him of like, why didn't you save all those people why are why are why is anyone dead yeah that well that's a big question

yeah you would never rest but it's the same thing with god you know and they talk about luther talks about it of uh you know oh we gotta get to that guy yeah that guy yeah boy oh boy that guy that guy with that hair. The hair. Boy, oh boy. I couldn't wait to talk about the wig. That wig was wild. The wig was crazy bad. I didn't understand why it was so bad.

I was like, it's not that hard. It's not. It really isn't. That one just was like super fake looking. I don't know why. Okay, so later that day, Clarkson signed by Perry White, Lawrence Fishburne, and traveled to Gotham City to cover the Metropolis vs. Gotham football game, given the headline Underdog Dreams dashed 10 yards between Gotham and Glory.

When the news reports on Wallace Keefe vandalizing the Superman statue by spray painting the words False God in red on his chest before he's arrested, Clark is visibly saddened by this hate crime. Is that a hate crime? It's not a hate crime. Hey, that's a hate crime about me. It's just a mean crime. It's not a hate crime. Hey, that's a hate crime about me. It's just a mean crime. Unless you view aliens as like a protected class of people.

We can't get into that. In Metropolis, billionaire business mogul Lex Luthor, which Batman once said Lex Luthor. He said it so weird. I don't know why. He did. Jesse Eisenberg meets with Senator Finch and her subordinate to discuss the radioactive mineral discovered in the Indian Ocean, wishing to manufacture the mineral into a deterrent against Superman and other possible known metahumans. Finch leaves considering this idea while Luther gains access to the Kryptonian scout ship and the body of General Zod from her subordinate.

Luther later tries to persuade Senator June Finch to allow him to import the mineral, but she declines, claiming to see through his facade of good intentions. Luther warns Finch of potential consequences before she leaves. This is like an hour into the movie, and I'm like, why are we just seeing him? Also, is this where he feeds a Jolly Rancher to somebody? Yeah, forcibly. That was very, very weird to me. Can we talk about his character?

Let's talk about him, i'm i'm interested in what you guys thought of him because a lot of people are love him or hate him uh because when he was cast people were a little like he's young that doesn't oh who's typically like what so the the lex luthers we've seen are gene hackman oh wow who who would not shave his head for the role what so they had so they had to he goes through the whole movie with hair and they have to justify Who would not shave his head for the role. What? Is he bald? So they had to, he goes through the whole movie with hair and they have to justify it by putting a bald cap on him occasionally and saying that hair is a wig and seeing him put on hair. Oh, that's very silly. It's crazy.

Okay, so maybe they were supposed to believe that Lex Luthor's hair is a wig, but then he shaves it off. So we've seen Gene Hackman and then we saw Kevin Spacey. Wow. Oh. A. Oh. A total Sigma. That's a Sigma. Never mind. Kevin Spacey who shaved his head for the role. So those – traditionally Lex Luthor is an older businessman or at least he's Superman's age.

And so they cast Jesse Eisenberg coming off of the social network. And he is doing, I think, an Elon Musk impression. Yeah. And this is before anyone knew how annoying Elon Musk was. And when people still thought like, oh, he's a good guy or whatever. Yeah. I think Jesse Eisenberg saw the Elon Musk type of person who is a super rich person who's just been handed everything. Yeah.

And is doing a really very annoying character purposefully. I thought he was doing a very good job. I also thought this is the type of person who is going to try to date me. In real life? Yeah. He's like a freedom fan like that's really funny the type of person who wants to date i was like this guy won't leave me alone at a party i can just feel this i can feel his energy oh no um i was worried about him and but he was i thought

he did a very good job i thought the actor was really good I thought I thought he made it really interesting and like I think he's very interesting I I think but some people were just not on board it didn't really bother me but I was I was thinking about Jim Carey doing the Riddler it somehow is connected to that a little bit for me there were like points where he's being a little like maniacal and I was like some people say like he's acting too much like the Joker okay you know of like you know it is kind of like that but it's like too much like the Joker. Okay. You know, of like, ha ha. It is kind of like that, but it's kind of like, why is he like, yeah, those parts I didn't love. All right. Well, just back.

Yeah, all the political stuff is so fucking boring. It is. And you don't need any of it because you're getting to this congressional thing, interrogation of Superman, where suddenly everyone blows up and you don't need any of it, I think. Yeah, that was honestly very wild. And then when they were recovering bodies, I was like, so none of them have blood on them and they're all in one piece? Then they blow up?

Yeah. That is kind of like, I guess, the feeling during that first scene where I was like, the destruction didn't feel... But, you know, what do I really want to watch? I don't know. You should just go watch World Trade Center. Yeah, I don't want to be... If you want some laughs like that. I don't want to see really want to watch? I don't know. You should just go watch World Trade Center. I don't want to see

that, really. So, I don't know. But that was, I don't know, kind of a weird choice. I think the whole thing is a weird choice. Like, why are these Superman movies filled with so many hundreds and thousands of people dying? I couldn't believe it. It's not necessary.

And I thought, like, the whole the whole, because as it's starting, I'm like the whole idea is that they protect people that's from happening. They should be killing off all these alien spaceships and stuff. Meanwhile,

they're just slicing and dicing. Wait, was it only Zod who comes or did other Kryptonians come? I'm pretty, it's usually a trio. It's usually Zod, Ursula, and then the big dumb one.

I can't remember in the first Superman movie if it's three of them, but I think it is. And why are they leaving Krypton to come here? So Krypton blew up. That's a big part of Superman's origin. blew up that's a big part of superman's origin is and it when i when i was growing up i thought it was the the most unrealistic part of superman's origin is that krypton was a planet that was that was uh uh krypt uh superman's father was a scientist and figured out that the things they were doing on earth were going to make the planet blow up and everyone was like shut up scientist we don't care and then it made the planet blow up and i was always like people will

pay attention to scientists right no they won't so it's so the planet blows up they had been uh superman's dad had been building this experimental rocket that they could all leave on, but it was only in a prototype that was small. It only had room for Superman as a baby. So they send it off. He built it so small that only a baby could fit? Yeah. So he was like, we don't have to.

He realized at the end, it's like when you're making something out of clay, and then you're like, oh, the middle is really small. This is for one flower. So he sent Superman to Earth, but then these three were convicts that had been off-world in the jail, essentially, the Phantom Zone or whatever, and they figure out how to get to Earth.

And so it's like three Supermen who want to, they're convicts and they want to do bad shit. So that's what these villains are always about. Okay. Back in Gotham, Bruce has been searching for someone known as the White Portuguese, who he tells Alfred is bringing a dirty bomb to Gotham. Bruce learns that a Russian man named Anatoly Kinyazev, which I already pronounced, may have information on this.

Bruce attends an underground fight club where he meets Kinyazev, which I already pronounced, may have information on this. Bruce attends an underground fight club where he meets Kinyazev. He and Bruce had a brief conversation during which Bruce successfully cloned Kinyazev's phone and discovered that Kinyazev, okay, stop putting it in every other word, works for Lex Luthor. They're just, like, they're taunting you. Bruce then expresses his intention to break into Luthor's house as Batman, but Alfred's quick to point out that would be unnecessary as Luthor has... Not a Luthor, but Luthor. A point out that would be unnecessary as Luther has already invited Bruce to attend an upcoming fundraiser.

None of this is necessary at all. Okay, I'd love to not talk about it. Great, okay. At Lex Luthor's fundraiser event, Clark is representing the Daily Planet while Bruce aims to infiltrate information regarding the white portuguese and its occupant among the event is what oh antique stealer diana prince galgado suspicious about

bruce clark approaches him claims he wants to interview him uh then they discuss batman's brutal activities in gotham and different perceptions of superman and the nature of the world clark condemns bruce's alter ego and bruce's unapologetic in saying Superman's a threat to humanity. Bruce later leaves to retrieve his data collected from the main frame of Lex's house. It's just so exhausting. It is. So was it exciting to see Gal Gadot?

No, I've never seen Wonder Woman. Okay. But I was going, oh, is she supposed to be Wonder Woman? This is the first time you've ever seen her. Okay, so that's the first time she's doing the Wonder Woman stuff. I mean, she's a fun actress.

So it's bad enough this plot is already so complicated, but now they're adding, hey, we got to introduce Wonder Woman and the rest of the Justice League as well in order to set up the next movie. It felt late. It's way too late. It's shoehorned into these scenes when you should be focusing on the Batman-Superman conflict. Yeah, and then I was like, are they going to date? What's happening here? And then it was like, are they going to date? What's happening here? And then it was like, no, I don't know.

But this is the first time you've ever seen her, and yeah. Yeah. So the rest of the world is busy debating whether Superman has been a positive

or negative addition to planet Earth, and Clark returns home to Smallville, based on the show, to visit his mother, Martha. It's very interesting because in this movie,

the town Smallville is based on that show. It is, yeah. They're like, we made this town. It's kind of like this this movie the town Smallville is based on that show it is yeah they're like we made this town it's kind of like this show from the WB his mom is Diane Lane

who I think is fantastic she's great she's just delightful but I was like why why are we now in Smallville we're now

eight hours into this movie what are we doing and then the whole they're both their moms are named Martha which comes out later. Batman and Superman. Oh my god. Why did you say Martha? Why did you say Martha? And I was like oh my god.

Ben get a grip. So stupid. It's the part everyone makes fun of about this movie. I remember seeing it and everyone just like laughing during it. Did everyone did they already name the mom Marthatha in the comics so both of these comics were introduced in the 30s and back then if you had to make an older woman

character they were always named martha martha oh it's like a george and martha what is that i don't know what i'm talking about who's afraid of virginia yeah that's something yeah thank you you're welcome but there are old lady names traditionally in comics and that's so they just kind of go like if you're old you're martha yeah you're a martha and then they're like why are you saying martha it's like everyone's martha why do you think it's just about you don't you know what's going on oh so bruce and diana meet again and diana explains that she borrowed the data because she believes lex luther has a photo of her which she was unable to acquire due to the drive being protected by a military

grade encryption. And then when they were like the data decrypting Yeah, they were like data decryption happening So that's the picture of her in like World War II or whatever that she wanted back? So this is the first time we're ever seeing Wonder Woman and they know they're making

a Wonder Woman movie set in World War I Oh So they're making a wonder woman movie set in world war one oh so so they're they're they're trying to figure out how to introduce all the members of the justice league they do it really awkwardly and inelegantly and why would she want i mean yeah okay yeah it's great to have a picture of you with your lost love this is chris pine is her boyfriend who's like gone now right he dies in the first wonder woman movie am i crazy i don't feel like we need to have everyone appear in a movie first before i can watch a movie about them i'm like just make a movie about wonder woman and they were trying to do you guys did the marvel universe where everyone like had their own movie before they teamed up in

the in yes in the avengers they were trying to leapfrog over that. They're like reverse engineering. They're like, no one's going to want to watch a Flash movie. No one's going to want to watch, you know, like we need to introduce them in this thing that people are already going to, because everyone's hyped for Batman versus Superman. We need to introduce the Justice League in this one so then we can make a Justice League movie next. Okay.

I understand the thought process. Oh, yeah, but it doesn't work at all. It doesn't make sense. Now, this part I really hated. While decrypting the drive, Bruce falls asleep and has a nightmare of a post-apocalyptic world where Superman leads a regime over the world and Batman leads an insurgency to stop him. Batman arrives at a meeting point where a truck supposedly carrying kryptonite arrives.

However, Batman is betrayed and a battle ensues. Batman is eventually captured. Superman arrives and kills others tied up with him. Superman unmasks Batman and states that she was my world and you took her from me and then crushes Batman's chest. As Bruce wakes up, a time traveler, Ezra Miller from the future arrives,

tells Bruce Lois Lane's the key. The time traveler quickly realizes he came too soon and pivots, bruce that he's always been right about superman and should fear him and then bruce is like what where are my description done i was like i didn't like how it was a dream right so i didn't realize it was a dream till he woke up and i was like what the fuck it's so confusing and it's it's what it's doing is setting up not the next movie but the movie after that whoa they're thinking too far ahead and yeah i i think it's again it's just zack snyder going like what would be cool to film um yeah it was like a whole different world it's i think it's based on a video game the the batman

with his trench coat so it's like a look that he wanted to film like some of those batman looks in this movie yeah he had so many weird looks well He looked dumb. We'll talk about the one during the fight. When he had really thick stuff on. Yes, the fight. Yeah. He was wearing like monster boots. That's based on Dark Knight.

I didn't like that. That's a real Frank Miller look. I didn't like it either. He doesn't need this level of protection. He always lives. The other thing is, why is he working out so much?

It's like Superman is so much stronger. Yeah. But so the the whole thing that they're setting up in this scene is the the the second justice league movie that he wants to make which is lois lane dies it drives superman so crazy that he succumbs to dark side who is the villain in the justice league movie he succumbs to his anti-life equation, which is this thing that turns people into zombies, right? And so then Batman leads a ragtag group of the DC heroes and the Joker to fight Superman.

The Joker being Jared Leto, by the way. Yeah. It's so crazy to slip that in the middle of this movie, but at the same time, something exciting is happening. But this movie should be a two-hour movie

if you stripped out everything that you don't need and got to the fight between... Yeah, that would have been nice. Oh, it's just an insane movie if you stripped out everything that you don't need and got to the fight between oh it's it's just an insane movie where it's like

everything that Zack Snyder wants to film and then just how do we justify all of this stuff happening and they barely do I have to say I like that Superman

is like monogamous and loves Lois so much it makes him sick whenever he can't be with her and something's fucked up with her because if you had a super dick it is nice if you had a super dick... It is nice. If I had a super dick, I could fuck everyone.

But I just want to fucking nourish the town. And they wouldn't even know it. That's the other thing. Yeah, yeah. They wouldn't even know because I look like a guy. But my dick's super... No, he'd just be fast about it. Why? Oh, he's so fast that they don't even know they had sex with him. He's like, that was awesome for me. Ugh.

Okay, so blah, blah, blah. Superman has a responsibility to let his partner have an orgasm as well. They need to come first. He can't be so fast in the bedroom. Plus, I don't think he is based on that tub scene. Again, I think he takes his time. I think he takes it nice and slow. I think that Superman, that's the other thing, is he has impervious skin.

Oh. But in order to have feeling in his penis, I think his penis is even more sensitive than... You do think about this. Yes. I know. Like, well,

due to my calculations, his dick is sensitive. There was a Mr. Show sketch I was trying to pitch where Superman had super skin, you know, that was bulletproof other than his balls and lex luther figured out the way to the way to defeat him was kicking him in the ball that's it

that's funny that's it that's the thing that takes superman down not my super kick the fuck uh we can zip zip exactly there's so much we gotta skip along and you guys haven't even gotten to the fight or even worse the last half hour no no no there's there's truly too many there's so much okay so zod batman intercepts the kryptonite package in his batmobile but before you get the kryptonite superman shows up and tell Batman that his idea is dead and he should bury it. Batman ends up letting, or no, Superman lets Batman go.

Batman asks if he, if he can bleed after Superman flies away. Yeah. This is in the, when I was watching it in the, in the theater, this is where it goes off the rails to me because this is where nothing makes sense anymore after this.

Um, because Batman saying like, do you bleed? You will. And Superman being so like, hey bro, you gotta stop being Batman. None of it is justified at this point.

I feel like it went off the rails for me as soon as it began. Yeah. From the jump, I was like, who are, what is happening? What's going on?

So then Batman returns to the Batcave where he learns from a tracking device that he implanted on a truck that Kryptonite has been taking to LexCorp Research Park. I mean, I gotta jump a little bit because it's just too many details. Okay, so in Washington, D.C., Superman meets Lois at her hotel suite

and laments on his failures to stop the bombing and his role as Superman. Lois tries to convince him because there's a bomb with the hole. Yeah, Lex Luthor has set up a—he's recruited Scoot McNary to testify before Congress and gives him a wheelchair to do it. No one knows that there's a bomb in the wheelchair because it's lead-lined with—Superman cannot see through lead. That's why he would— That's a key detail. That's a key detail. That's a key detail why he was not able to stop the bomb. So he feels bad about that.

Lead is so random. I think back when Superman was first introduced in the 30s, lead was like a- Very special. Very special thing that you would like line things with lead, or you'd put something behind lead. It's like why everyone's poisoned. Yeah.

Lois tries to convince him that he must remain a symbol of hope. And then he flies away. And then Lex uses the fingerprints of Zod to enter the Genesis Chamber. This is important. The Genesis Chamber of the Fortress of Solitude in Heroes Park. And he learns information on hundreds of thousands of recorded worlds.

So he goes into this bucket of baked beans. Right? This is when this happens. He walks straight into beans. This is the ship that you saw from the first Superman movie of Zod that everyone was trying to kill each other. He figures out how to access all the information that they brought from Krypton, and he gets the DNA from this Kryptonian and cuts himself and mixes it with his own blood, which is

what creates the monster at the end. Yeah, which was really gross. Yeah, I didn't like that monster. Just the fact that his blood created it and then the way that it looked. Yeah, it was weird. Bruce begins physical training in the Batcave to prepare for his fight against Superman while simultaneously converting the Kryptonite into three gas grenades and a kryptonite-tipped spear.

He's making little weapons. He discovers data folders of Lex's on metahumans, and one contains surveillance on Diana and she's Wonder Woman, and he figures that out. Meanwhile, Lex brings the corpse of General Zod to the Genesis Chamber. This is so weird. And Keillor warns him of

the ban of genetic modification by the Kryptonian Law Council. Who's Keillor? I don't know. Was that the Norse talking to him? This is all Kryptonian shit that they brought over from Krypton. So this is when he mixes his blood and he makes the goo guy. Yeah. And he doesn't care that it's illegal because he's

rich and tough. Yeah. Also, I think they're trying to set up like, hey, don't do this because we've had failures with it in the past. So they're trying to set up like hey don't do this because we've had failures with it in the past so they're trying to set up that he shouldn't be doing it because it turns this thing into a monster yeah at the end yeah which it did so then clark he goes to a snowy mountaintop and his dad is there it's kevin costner his dad who died in the first superman movie by the way okay oh okay so he is dead yeah um kent recalls his childhood particularly one bad rainy season blah blah blah blah blah in smallville martha's kidnapped uh batman shines the bat signal into

his stormy sky as lex watches from lex corp tower across the bay yeah superman saves uh lois lane before confronting lex luther building yeah yeah which was pretty rude um and then lex shows superman photographs of his kidnapped mother and offers an ultimatum if he doesn't kill batman within 30 minutes then martha kent will die by fire he uses a little kitchen timer that's like plastic i was he's like time's running out and he's being a little jokery about he's like time is running out also the the photographs i don't know that why they why do we want to see superman's mother like gagged and like they're they're almost like snuff film photographs i don't i don't get the aesthetic here like why it's turning zack snyder on to to like humiliate superman's mother like this i don don't know. It's a weird choice to me.

It's very strange. So this part I thought was kind of corny a little bit. So at Heroes Park, the Fortress of Solitude begins to emit electric discharges to the surrounding buildings. Elsewhere, Diana receives an email from Bruce showing a photograph of her from 1918. Okay, so then this just slows everything down

where Diana then like clicks on all these links and views. from 1918. Okay, so then this just slows everything down where they, Diana then like clicks on all these links and views. So she's seeing surveillance footage of, of the Flash. The Flash.

Jason Momoa being like kind of floating towards the screen. And like sticking a spear. It was like so weird. I'm like, what is this POV? So stupid.

And then, and then Cyborg's, Silas Stone. Yeah, the other superhero is Cyborg's... Who's Silas Stone? Yeah, the other superhero is Cyborg, and you see his origin story. And she's just sitting there watching this on a computer, and we're like, aren't Batman and Superman going to fight here in a second? Aren't you Wonder Woman? Why are you on your phone like me? Stop looking at this bullshit and go to wherever you're supposed to be.

Then Lois returns to the Daily Planet. She rides a helicopter. Okay. And then in Gotham, Superman meets Batman in his armored bat suit and tries to explain the situation. Batman does not bother to listen as he activates sonar cannons and machine gun turrets against Superman to no visible effect. And you don't need anything before that because Batman already has a reason to fight Superman. His employees died in in that building right that's enough and then they fight batman fires two kryptonite gas grenades at

him and gains the upper hand batman grabs the weekend superman and drags him over to his kryptonite weekend superman he's only superman on the weekend who we should know it's the weekend version of the singer um and drags him over to his kryptonite spear. As Batman's about to kill Superman, Superman pleads with Batman to save Martha. They go off about whose Martha matters more because they're both- So this is why you see Martha being killed at the beginning.

So we care. So that he's like, Martha, how can I save Martha? Because Batman was unable to save his own Martha. He then wants to save this Martha. And so he thinks he's being taunted by him. Superman and Lois explain the situation to Batman. No, his mom's Martha too.

And I was like, how did Lois appear there? It was lucky that she was translating for them. It was just luck, yeah. And she even says it at one point. Lucky thing I walked in here. He promises to rescue Martha Kent while Superman investigates the electric discharges. Lois grabs the spear, throws it into a pool of water to dispose of it. That was a little silly tale.

She's like, uh. That was very silly. It's like, now we're good. And he gets up. He's like, I'm fine now. It's far enough away. Yeah. Batman kind of looks like he's dressed for a rave.

Like with his big stompers moon boots they're almost like uggs yeah they kind of are like it makes it makes it such a waste that ben athlod got so fit for the role too because you're like he's so bundled up he looks like a kid going to school in a snowstorm no it's it's that it is the frank mill aesthetic. Frank Miller, who wrote and drew The Dark Knight that this is all based on, is very into like shoes and boots. Like all of his characters have big ass boots on and you see the treads of the boots all the time. So that's like his artistic style. And so they're trying to recreate that. But it looks kind of silly.

It looks random, I feel. Maybe if other people had something something it would have been better but what they're trying to do is like when you saw the marvel movies the the hulk buster iron man the the giant iron man uh armor that fights the hulk that it's all sort of based on this of like batman's trying to get big and buff and armored up in order to put him and superman on an even even playing field it looks cooler as iron man yeah and more i agree uh so let's see okay martha's safe then lex executes his backup plan by the way martha's safe that it doesn't make to me it doesn't make any sense that batman is now totally Superman's side here just because he heard the name Martha. Right.

Because now he goes and saves- But he wants to save a mom. Yes, but he goes and saves Martha. Someone's mommy. And they have a line where he captures Diane Lane and he goes, hi, I'm a friend of your son's. That's so lame. It's so dumb. They're friends now?

We're pals. They're best buddies. Batman and Superman this is it doesn't make any sense but they have to get there in order for the next movie to make sense yeah so Martha's okay Lex unleashes

an ancient Kryptonian deformity known as Doomsday designed to kill Superman I didn't catch his name as the monster awakens I didn't catch his name either this is the problem with the movie okay so the whole movie is like we want to see batman and superman fight and when they announced this at comic-con years before it came out and zach snyder said the next superman movie no one had any idea batman was in it he says the the sequel to superman is

and they show the poster batman versus superman and it's based on the fight in the Dark Knight. Everyone goes crazy, right? That's what we want to see. But you can't set up the next movie with having them fight and have a resolution of a fight. So they're like, how do we end this movie? This is a totally separate comic book. We don't need Doomsday.

The death of Superman was years later where bring the death of superman like was years later where a big kryptonian monster named doomsday kills superman it was a big media event it's just shoehorned in here as the last half hour of this movie like we already have a conflict i don't really need this guy so it's yeah suddenly there's a big monster for the last half hour of the movie that we don't give a shit about. It doesn't make any sense. No, and it's so gross. Yeah, he's a big problem with it.

It's gross. Wonder Woman like lassos him and stuff. Wonder Woman comes. She's like, hey, boys, let's team up and be the Justice League. She's really strong. I liked that. And then they're fighting this. It would have been funny if she was really weak.

She's like, oh, that hurt. Ew. Oh, my God. My nail nail broke so they're fighting him together and then superman is floating in space extremely weak this made me laugh when he was all like he looked like a like a raisin floating in space after they send a rocket he looked like one of the he looked like one of the california raisins like the one who has the sunglasses and the saxophone. He looked just like that. Yeah. And he sang the same song. Rendered thin, he's undead in appearance.

Soon he's exposed to radiation from the yellow sun, reinvigorating Superman's cells. It returns him to full power. He proceeds to fly towards doomsday, sending the monster flying into a gas tank. Superman, Wonder Woman, and Batman, they get in formation. They battle the monster. And they cut off his hand. And then something grows

back in the place of it. And meanwhile, Lois is in Gotham trying to retrieve the spear from underwater. She's like, oh, remember that spear I threw away? This was a stressful scene to me. What if I got it back? It's so poorly done. Like, I've never seen a movie like this where one of the heroes This was a stressful scene to me. What if I got it back? It's so poorly done. I've never seen a movie like this where one of the heroes throws something away and then goes, oh shit, I gotta go back and get it. Yeah, that's really silly.

She literally did it to herself. Oopsies. She didn't throw that away. Superman can hear her drowning. He flies to rescue her. He retrieves the spear. Wonder Woman temporarily restrains Doomsday with lasso. And Superman sees the only way to stop Doomsday with lasso and Superman sees the

only way to stop Doomsday is to risk his own life. He says goodbye to Lois with a kiss, takes the spear. But I couldn't believe how much time they took. They took so much time for him to be with Lois Lane and I was like, there is a literal goopy, nasty monster out there. We gotta kill that thing.

He exposes himself to the substance of kryptonite in the process of flying. Are you a scientist now, Lauren? Yeah, I added kryptonite. So yeah, he exposed himself and that was a risk he was willing to take. But then it like weakens him, but then he could fly into him just fine.

I know. I was like, what is the logic here? He stabs him in the chest. Okay, then Superman is mortally wounded. No, I didn't think he was going to pass on. Yeah, he's got a fucking hole in his chest. He gets buried in a casket with an S on it. And I thought, how many people tried to get that casket for themselves after they saw this?

Oh, the ultimate collectors. Is it a cool casket to have? It's just an option in the catalog. Yeah, it kind of should be. After the Barbie movie they probably had some barbie caskets too oh my god oh i bet you're right um so they have a funeral for him in smallville wait but first i'm like who's in the superman casket they bring that up they say that it's oh they did. What? They say, isn't it crazy that everyone is mourning an empty casket in the official funeral

for Superman while Clark Kent, the real dead Superman, is here in Smallville. Wow. This was when I was fighting for my life. I had toothpicks

holding my eyes open and I was like, what? The casket did pique my interest enough, but I feel like Anytime you? The casket did pique my interest enough, but I feel like Anytime you see a casket. I actually feel like

there was still a lot of the movie left at this point because I switched rooms after the casket. You switched rooms. Because I was like, I'm going to wash my face

because I was getting I got to watch this in two separate locations. I was getting really tired so I went, I got to wash my face, get ready for bed and then I'm going to finish it

because otherwise it's going to be, you know, and then it went on for much longer yet there's only two sentences here i don't remember it going on much longer well there's no there's the lex luther stuff yeah they had to do the whole fight we didn't get no no no the the in jail oh right right where he shaved his head but anyway so so lois puts dirt on the on the on the grave and then it starts to float which gives us the impression that maybe he's gonna be okay after all is being buried alive that's sad i know but lex luther shaves his head he goes to jail he goes

to jail batman visits him and is like you can see him about to brand him like he branded all the other criminals but he doesn't he pulls back uh he brands the wall he brands the wall and he also has a conversation with wonder woman where he's like we got to get everyone together to as a group to be the justice league we got to find all these people who are like us he's just a rich guy by the way i don't know why he's like including himself in this like us kind of thing but we gotta we gotta band together because something's coming he just has a feeling something's coming and he goes i failed him in life i won't fail him in death like this the just 180 that he makes on superman does yeah is not justified at all where now he's like i'm a friend oh he's the the best guy in the world i gotta live up to his ideals but i think what they're

trying to say is like okay i'm no longer the crazy fascist batman yeah i'm like back to protecting people batman all right i'll accept um i accept should we jump into the awards and reception of this film of course of course we should lauren so it earned 166 million in the U.S. and Canada on its opening weekend. It became the eighth highest grossing film of all time. But was also a disappointment. People were personally sad, but they went to view it.

No, no. It did not make as much money as they wanted it to. Oh, okay. Well, in its second weekend, Batman v. Superman Dawn of Justice Ultimate Edition experienced a historic box office drop with an 81.2% decline on Friday that was one of the biggest Friday to Friday drops

any blockbuster has ever seen and an overall 68.4% drop for the weekend despite not facing any big competition at the box office. People hated it. Wow. And they told everyone, don't go yes don't go the film holds 29 on rotten tomatoes and it was overall panned by wow this is one of the first times where we're like matching up i feel like with what yes this movie was hot trash yeah okay no way let's read

some trivia in a vulture article where celebrities were asked who would win in a fight batman or superman michael shannon who played zod answered i'm so utterly unconcerned with the outcome of that fight. So profoundly, utterly unconcerned. I can't even come up with a fake answer. Michael Shannon. He's so awesome. He gives like awesome interviews. This is great.

I guess I have to root for Superman because he killed me. So I would hope that he would continue his killing spree and become like a serial killer Superman. That's a new take on Superman. We'd all be in a heap of trouble if Superman was a serial killer. He could just wipe us all out, but then he'd be lonely. That's a great answer. That is the plot of Mark Waid's Irredeemable, by the way. Wow. So

someone took that idea? No, but I mean, it already existed. Well, they took it in the past. Yep. He's a time traveler. Composer Hans Zimmer said this will be the last superhero movie for which

he will compose music for this movie broke Hans Zimmer I don't I actually noticed the music this time more than ever

and I liked it well there are two themes the Wonder Woman theme is introduced here yeah I noticed that which is very big which is fun

yeah but also the Lex Luthor theme the the bong, bang, bong, bang. Oh, yeah. That is used in Justice League a little bit, too. Everyone had a little theme. It was kind of cute. But I think Hans Zimmer, the issue for him was he was trying not to replicate what he did in The Dark Knight. Whenever Batman came on screen, he's just like, this is too confusing now.

Oh, okay. This is a weird fact. Gal Gadot had 16 lines in the film. She's given one or two more lines in the extended cut. I'm like, yeah, she didn't have any lines. Why is that a fact? Yeah. Yeah, she barely was in the movie.

But they're just throwing her in there to introduce Wonder Woman. I mean, 16 lines. It is fewer than I thought, I guess. Okay, let's take a quick break and we'll be back with more Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice

Ultimate Edition after this. We're back. This segment's called Holy Batman. Batman in this new segment will rate Ben Affleck on the definitive

newcomer's Batman scale. We're going to use our phones to rank him on five unique characteristics. Preparedness. How prepared is this Batman? Does he get to use his little gadgets and tools? Detective ability. Does this Batman get to be a little detective? Is he good at mystery solving? Voice gravelliness. How gravelly is this Batman's voice? Sadness. How lonely, brooding, emo is this Batman?

And finally, hotness slash horniness. How hot and how horny is this Batman's voice? Sadness. How lonely, brooding emo is this Batman? And finally, hotness slash horniness. How hot and how horny is this Batman? Oh, this is cool. So you do this and then you fill out this little form and then we'll see what our average is for what we thought of this Batman. Okay, I did it. Okay, great. Is everyone locked in? I'm locked in. I have all my answers locked it. Okay, great. Is everyone locked in? I'm locked in.

I have all my answers locked in. Okay. So for preparedness, we gave this Batman a 56%. I feel like he wasn't really particularly... Well, he made the kryptonite aerosol spray. Yeah. That's pretty prepared. He was prepared.

I think. He made the big spear with the tip where he said, just the tip, Superman. He did. Yeah. Yeah. He was like, just the tip. Don't touch the tip, though. Just the tip.

Yeah. I guess he was sort of doing some stuff, but it just felt like he was kind of like, he wasn't listening to Alfred. He wasn't. No. I feel like he didn't care. He was just like doing his own thing and he was like, whatever. I just hate Superman.

Yeah. Okay. Detective ability we gave him. Can you make it a little bigger? I gave him a zero, because I thought he was kind of stupid the entire time. We gave him 26%. Yeah, I agree.

I think I gave him a little bit of leeway here, but I don't know why. You have a Batman movie coming up that I think he's even worse in as a detective. Oh, no. Oh, great. What movie is that on the batman the oh voice gravelliness a hundred percent he was completely modulated now i was wondering because i was so strange i was gonna go 100 or i was gonna go zero

because it's all fake but he's technically because he uses the voice modulator he's more gravelly than any other batman he's the most gravelly we've seen um i felt it was so fake that i was like that's a that's almost weird like i just like i wanted to hear his real voice more i think but it's okay they did a lot of that with christian bale too didn't they they made it or didn't they modify it yeah sadness 34.3 percent he's more angry the whole time okay i thought he was pretty sad just because he seemed pathetic to me i've seen sadder batmans i feel yeah yeah he wasn't sad because this one wasn't too sad he was mad he was sad about his mom but he didn't seem to have the sadness that we have that like michael keaton was more of a brooding like my life is so tragic um hotness hoarding this 41.3 i gave him 100 because of this scene that i might have imagined where he's in the shower because i don't remember

that i don't remember it either we're gonna need i remember that i feel like you're both on your phone the entire movie that's not true it's not true. I truly tried to watch this movie. I tried so hard. It was so hard. It's tough. To get to the butt, which is like the dessert. Why didn't you text me that there was a butt?

I would have paid more attention. I feel like I'm going to look this up. We're going to find out. Should I just put in Batman's butt and see what pops up? Yeah, put in Batman's butt. Put it in Batman's butt. Darian Killam's news segment we have to jump to.

How did the score score? So do we like the score by Hans Zimmer? We kind of touched on this already, but I liked it. I thought it was cool. I think there's some pretty iconic moments in it. And now, did Junkie XL also do part of the score? And I noticed that, yes. It did say Junkie XL at the beginning with Hans Zimmer.

And then it was a little more amped up. And I was like, that's the Junkie XL coming into play, I think. Yeah, I think... Not knowing who that is at all. I think the iconic Wonder Woman... Yeah, who's Junkie XL? I don't know, but I was on board instantly. He's like a DJ who did the Wonder Woman score. I think the iconic Wonder Woman thing is actually Junkie XL's

edition, but I could be wrong. What a fun name. It is fun. How did Junkie XL pick that name? I know. Just a little messy and fat he also did uh the mad max score i believe okay here's a picture of the butt dang i missed that it's a good butt if you google it you'll find it yeah um five kapows even even lighter they've lightened okay maybe I do remember this. I don't know. He farts out of that.

Well, sure, but it's cool. But it's still nice. Time for reviews. Once again, we are going to be reading reviews from Letterboxd, and then we'll each give a one-sentence review ourselves and a star rating. So if you don't know, Letterboxd is a social platform where people can write reviews of films. Are you on Letterboxd,

personally? Maybe. Okay. Privately under a fake name. You can follow the show on Letterboxd at Newcomers. Here's one. Two stars from Garden of Eden. Fell asleep watching this in the theater.

Hey, my friend. But the Martha, Martha part was funny. See? And three stars from Sinky Pinky. Blah, blah, blah. Just kiss already. Fair enough. Okay. Nicole, do you have thoughts stars sure um i'm gonna give it half a star and my one sentence review is woof i hated it top to bottom snack what's his name zach snyder no i think i'm snack cider which i think is better. Snack Cider. Snack Cider.

Snack Cider has rules. You're bad. I didn't like it. That's funny. I'm going to give it one star. I don't think I've gone as low as a half. I feel like there's still room for it to go lower. But my review is more bathtub scene.

Less kryptonite, baby. I guess I, this is out of five stars. Yeah. I'm going to probably give it one and a half, but because I feel like it's all very watchable. I have very mixed feelings about it because I know you guys aren't going to watch the Justice League. Right. Or we're not watching. Justice League, the theatrical cut, is even worse.

It's one of the worst things I've ever seen. But Zack Snyder's version, the four-hour version. That's the quote-unquote Zack Snyder cut that everyone was talking about? Is actually good. And it's a fascinating, if you're a filmmaker, it is one of the most fascinating things to watch. To watch the Zack Snyder version, then go back to watch the zack snyder version then go back and watch the joss whedon version to see what they changed it it gives you such an interesting

glimpse into how a movie can be changed and and all that kind of stuff but the zack snyder justice league i don't agree with his point of view about superheroes at all i and what he wants to do with superhero movies but it is legitimately so much better than the theatrical version and he takes big big swings yeah and he films things beautifully so i can't just say like it's trash even though he makes bad choices in my opinion and it's boring great so you gave it one and a half which is that nice. But four hours, that's honestly unhinged. You know, Kulop did not go to Justice League with me because of this movie. It was so boring.

And I went and I came back and I said, Justice League is so fucking bad. And we watched during pandemic, we watched the Justice League and an hour into it, we looked at each other and we're like, is this actually really good? And we thought it was. It's very weird. But again, I don't agree with anything he's plotting or making the superheroes do. But it's interesting. Somehow it works. Yeah.

Well, okay. And then, as always, we love to read reviews of our own program. This one is five stars from Meg Smith. A blast. Thank you for watching these movies so i don't have to how is your theme music always so good dancing to it now does it change every week yeah every week it's a new song well it's different with each um theme that we're talking with each season um so we encourage you

to please out there please go write a review on apple podcast you only read the good ones yeah we only the good ones there's no such thing as you have to give five stars the thing doesn't work unless you put five and we pick one to read on the next episode and you can also rate on spotify which is simply just clicking five stars and moving on with your day just click it yeah you love it click it or ticket do you click it or ticket scott do you have anything that you want to plug yeah i have a new podcast with adam scott uh called you spring and springsteen on my bean which is right off the tongue adam and i uh go through the entire bruce springsteen discography it's very confusing because you can't find it by that title.

You have to, it's under the subheading of you talking you too to me, which is the main, our main show. You did a YouTube podcast together. We did a YouTube podcast and we didn't want to make it a different feed for each person. Well, because yeah, then you're going to,

you want the listeners to keep following you. So it's you talking you too to me, colon, you springing Springsteen on my bean. I love it. But yeah, it's been very fun. And then we also went to see U2 at the Sphere in Vegas recently. And we have a new U2 episode as well.

I saw that. So people can. Oh, that's fun. That looked fun. How's that sphere? I know. Was it fun? It's wild.

Did the sphere come out of nowhere? I feel like I just suddenly knew about a sphere. It was not there the day before. It was. It just dropped down. It's a lot like Zod and his Kryptonian ship. I love references like that. See, Zod, that's the thing. If he had dropped down and just made a concert venue

out of all that stuff, he could have made billions. And then all the people would have had fun and been happy instead of dying. Exactly. By the way, this is not the last you'll be seeing of Zod. What? I don't care. Oh, no.

More Zod. Dang. There is more Zod in your future. But you know what? But didn't he float away in the baked beans? Oh, yes, he did. Well, the next movie we're watching, I think we're going to like this one. We're watching the Lego Batman movie.

That seems fun. Okay. That seems like a nice time. we're watching i think we're gonna like this one we're watching the lego batman movie that seems fun okay that seems like a nice time that just seems like a relaxing moment for both of us i think we i think we deserved something like this we need a little silly time yes um we'll be back next batman in this one will arnett right yeah yeah i think zach is the joker who galifianakis oh awesome our colleague oh what a dream my dear friend that's amazing I think he's one of the only Joker people who's ever played the Joker who hasn't won an Academy Award

there's still time they can do it later yeah there's still time he's got a whole career he had to play Joker again yeah well we can't wait to watch that film we're so excited thank you for talking about Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice Ultimate Edition, Scott. We really appreciate that.

This was a blast. Yes, thank you. And we'll see you next week. Bye. Bye. We did it. Bye. Newcomers is a production of HeadGum Studios. Our producer is Ali Khan.

Our executive producer is Anya Kanivskaya. The show is edited, mixed, and mastered by Faris Manchi, who also composed our theme song. Follow us on Letterboxd at Newcomers and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. We might just read it on the next show. Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.

Bye! That was a Hiddem Original.