NFL Daily with Gregg Rosenthal - Surprise Episode: Marc's QB Index Haikus

Episode Date: October 19, 2022

Marc Sessler and Gregg Rosenthal bring you a surprise bonus episode of the Around the NFL Podcast checking in on Marc's latest QB Index, where he wrote a haiku for every starting quarterback. Marc and Gregg talk through the rankings and Marc gives dramatic readings of his best haikus.NFL Daily YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/nflpodcastsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. The Around the NFL podcast. That's a great point. Mark. Surprise. Welcome to the Around the NFL podcast. I'm Greg Rosenthal, alongside QB Index guru, Mark Sessler. And yeah, this is a surprise drop. This is your favorite musical artist, just releasing an album.

like a mixtape on a Friday, and you're just happy to get the extra content. Hopefully, Mark. Hopefully they will be. Yeah, we hinted at it on our Tuesday show, and now we are doing more than hinting at it, and we thought that we would just take a breeze through, a trip through the QB Index, where we stand. Of course, I'm doing this with the creator of the QB Index. So it's sort of like there's an interesting dynamic there.

Well, I do miss it. I have to admit I do miss watching the quarterbacks extra close and then ranking them. And that's why this week we thought it'd be fun. Just give a little extra episode, try something different, largely because Mark's concept for this week's article, which I implore everyone to check out at NFL.com slash QB Index

is amazing. You wrote haikus for all 32 players. So we're going to go through a good chunk of them. We're going to hear your haikus. Sure. And I'm also going to maybe push around about these rankings and see what we're going to do. How have you enjoyed it? You're now six, seven weeks in.

It's a lot of work. The thing I love about it is we are already taking game notes and trying to watch everything for our Thursday preview show and just overall gaining ideas of who these teams are. And it marries right away on Monday, writing it with a project that's due essentially Tuesday. That's fair. That's fair. Now, Hansis is looking for us. He was like, oh, Mark and Greg show. That could be spicy.

He wants us to have confrontation. Right. I think that Dan often silently, not even maybe intentionally, creates the environment where you and I get into the conflict. I feel like we're pretty polite with each other. But we'll try to get into it in this format. I think your ranking of Tuatugavilo is terrible, Mark. No.

Let's start near somewhere. near the top. Let's start with Justin Herbert. I don't know why. Just because I find him interesting right now. You have him number five. The top five right now. Josh Allen moved up to one. Patrick Mahomes is at two. I feel like those have to be the top two in some order. You could argue either way. You got Hertz and Lamar three and four. I don't have any argument there, although it's interesting that Lamar struggled the last few weeks and yet there's not anyone logical to pass them. And then Herbert here at 5. Go for your haiku.

My haiku for Justin Herbert. Human tornado trapped inside hyper milk toast bolts offensive scheme. And I would point to Monday Night Football as a kind of case in point. I just, because I, so Herbert is... Wait, I want to sit with that haiku a little more. So I, there's a certain amount of syllables each time.

Yes, it's got to be a 575. I would say like the reading of the haiku is important, too. So don't rush through it. Okay. That's all I'm saying, because that was great. Trapped inside hyper milk toast bolts. I mean, I was in the newsroom, like, counting on my fingers one through five and then one through five and seven. And there were various, like, television executives looking at me like I would just done a bag of cocaine. So, you know, slightly problematic.

At least you're off the psilocybin. It feels like, yeah, Joe Lombardi could use some psilocybin maybe to liven up this offense. Get the mind going. Yes. It's very vanilla. It's weird. It's almost like they've got this stallion of a horse here, but they're just, they're just, you know, letting kids ride him for birthday parties

instead of taking him out into the field. I was trying to really finish that analogy. I love what you said, though, you and Gravedigger on the Monday night recap that he's sort of a deodorant for the rest of that operation on some level. And it's like they're not using him even, I mean, they already had unlocked him in years prior,

and it's like we're getting a less, version of him now, a safer version. The whole offense doesn't seem to be equipped with any daring due. I know we hit Brady hard on the Tuesday show, so we can keep it quick, but I just love the haiku so much that I want you to go. Well, this haiku has been asked to, this is an Easter egg because this hycoup will not be appearing in print. But it is two Celsius at the wedding of Robert Kraft and people freaking out.

I love that we're giving an exclusive haiku to our podcast listeners because you guys deserve it, like too hot for NFL. I guess. I hope that doesn't make you uncomfortable. But yeah, I have a hard time feeling that him going out on Friday night had much to do with so. I think that's why I pointed to it because I feel like everything around the Tom Brady experience this season because we can tell he's a little unsettled emotionally. I mean, he was just going off on his lineman in the Steelers' loss.

And it's like, oh, what can we blame it on? His personal life, the fact that he went to a wedding, which he's like, these guys do all sorts of things all the time. I mean, I just didn't find that to be a factor in his play. He's throwing the ball really well. I think it's gotten underrated. He had three or four great throws in that game. The problem is everything in between.

Yeah, he's had a few more misses, I would say, than normal. But I think it's more he's just getting rid of the ball quickly because he doesn't trust what's going. going to happen, and it makes them a little boring to watch, too, but he's still got that arm. All of these haikus are so good, Mark, that I actually feel like we're losing, I'm losing something by not having all of them. Like, I didn't even want to discuss Jail-Len nerds, but I just want you, I do want to hear the haiku because it's so good.

They built a statue for Foles, four months away from a Jalen carving? That would be great. That's the Super Bowl pick, too. They, that is. It was your Super Bowl runner-up pick, so we could bowl. both be feeling great during Super Bowl week, and then you just root for the other team. And then you would be right. It grows complex, but I will root for the Eagles, and I will be right.

They've set a precedent here. Like if they win the Super Bowl, Siriani and Hertz have to have one next year. They have to. They have to also run a Philly special in that game if they get there. You have to. He's very steady. He's not going to kill you from the pocket all the time, but I think his improvement as a passer has been notable. Like, he makes some really nice throws

where he buys time in the pocket to throw instead of running. It's certainly not all RPO stuff. And he's a good decision maker. Like, how many times this year I've been like, oh, why did you do that, Jalen Hertz? No, I mean, it's on a handful like the bad throws he's made, too.

And, like, I feel like I can't find another quarterback on this list that made a bigger leap from where we ended with him last year and what that offense was to what it can do now. And, I mean, he's at three, and I guess in another season, maybe he wouldn't be at three. But it's been a tough year to be like,

oh, this guy's coming from the wilderness and sweeping up the list. There aren't a lot of guys doing that right now. It's a great point. Justin Graver, who's here with us. Hey. Justin? How many times have we?

That's how you doing. I thought I could get away with it without Dan. No, I mean, I like this. I like the whole bit. And, you know, feel free to do drops in here. all of your normal stuff great. You just looked like a man who had something to say. Well, I was going to bring it up,

and Mark just mentioned it, the leap that Jalen Hertz has made. I feel like it's underrated and often not talked about. Like, everyone talks about Josh Allen being this guy who improved so much and that it's so rare to see someone do that. But Jalen Hertz, I mean, his last year at Alabama, before he went to Oklahoma, he was a terrible passer of the football,

and he's just improved so much. And I think people kind of mocked Nick Siriani for some press conference things that he's seen. said when he first got hired, but he deserves a lot of credit for bringing along the radar as a coach. I feel like there should be more like Nick Siriani think pieces out there. It's a good point. I mean, people have just sort of accepted them as a superpower awfully quick. And you're right. Like what I did, you know, not to pat my own back here, but I did a sandwich prop. He's going to make the Pro Bowl team, Jalen Hertz, as like the first time in a pretty

loaded NFC for quarterbacks that he would be one of the top three. And I, and everyone at least took the sandwich on that. It's been really impressive. I remember Move the Sticks, our friend Daniel Jeremiah, who I'm excited to announce is going to start a podcast. Is that right?

Daniel, yeah. Oh, good. Well, it's about time. Yeah, like talk about the draft, have read Bucky Brits. I think it's going to be good. He's got a lot of knowledge. I remember during the draft process,

him wrestling with Jalen Hertz because he said he clearly isn't there as a passer, but we're seeing these sort of athletes, do well at quarterback, and there's something that everyone who's ever met Jalen Hertz says is so special about him that I just have to put him in my top 50, which was higher than most people had him. I just have to put him there just because even if it doesn't make sense, he hasn't shown it

on tape, he's just like such an amazing individual and wants it so bad that he thinks like he could get there someday. I mean, there's locker room clips of him weekly talking to the team. That's sort of been the unanimous thing. You know, we're a year removed from it's like this whole thing. Hurts is simply on a tryout to see if the Eagles can't find something better. Now it's like, that tryout worked. Right. And also, can we hold off on the like Jalen Hertz contract extension talk?

Let's just enjoy the season. Just let this season play out and then we can get to that. The football is more interesting. And the rest of this season will greatly inform the contract. You know, so just we don't need to talk about it now. It just is like, you know, just like, enjoy it. There you go, Sean Kelly. Love it.

He's in the back cheering, our resident Eagles fan. We've got so many Eagles fans everywhere. It's a three-day goes. The rest of the top 10, Gino Smith, Joe Burrow, Aaron Rogers at 9 and Tua, who, yeah, it's tough to know what to do with injured guys. I might add him a little lower. It's tough to know what to do with Aaron Rogers. Yeah.

I think you're, I would say you're being generous, but it comes back to what. what we're dealing with in the NFL, which Justin and I talked about on Monday night, too, of like, just offenses are down. Yards per attempt is way down in terms of quarterbacks. And so once you go through the rest of the list, actually, I don't have anyone that, like, screams they have to be ahead of Aaron Rogers.

I personally would have Tanna will hire, but we'll get to... I have a question for Mark. Yes. What does Gino Smith have to do to climb higher than he is? He's seventh. I mean, it's Gino Smith and he's seventh. The guys he's behind, other than Hertz, might all be Hall of Famers. Yeah, I think it's that.

I think it's just like, you're getting closer and closer where it should be based almost entirely on this season. I think you're there. After four or five weeks, I would say go there. But I also, like, look at the last game he had. It's like, he's been good. He's been great. I mean, I guess I could go put him at three or four, but I, and I see that, you know, also, like, I'll go check, like, PFF or something after I do it. And, I mean, all season long, he's been riding a top PFF.

Jeff. He's doing, he's QBR, darling, but it's like, I just don't, I look at the overall person and body of work to some degree still here in week six. And he's, seven is fine for me. He's like, is he a better quarterback than Tom Brady? This season he has been. I guess, but part of it is like Tom Brady's been in a rough environment. But he, but he has been, he, if you didn't know their names, you could, you could make a case for Gino Smith being hired. I think you got to go purely on this year. And I don't think it's crazy to have him. Where would you stick him, though, like above? That's what I mean. I don't think it's crazy to have him at seven purely on this year.

Yes, all the numbers would say higher. They would say, yeah, fourth probably behind Hertz, Mahomes and Allen. I did at least in the high coup for Gino Smith, take a shot at myself. Let's hear it. The author of this column giggled at me in August. Now he's hushed. I mean, I'm taking a huge dirt nap on the Gino front, and I've accepted it. You and many others.

I mean, Rex Ryan. Being on Rex Ryan. Dan. Dan. A lot of Gino doubters, a lot of Jets fans out there. It is outrageous. I weirdly liked last week as a Gino fan because the heights he was reaching were getting a little outrageous. And what I liked was, hey, the defense won them a game.

And that he just had like a normal, mediocre game. Because if that's his baseline of like his lower games, that's good. Yeah, you like the floor. Because he reminds me a little bit of a more athletic. now, Dalton. And I know that's a weird thing to say, but prime Dalton, whereas I just think he makes the right decisions. And I think he's ahead

of the Dalton scale, certainly right now. He's certainly flasher. He makes better throws. I just mean that he kind of gives what the defense, he takes what the defense gives him. And he doesn't make a lot of bad decisions. And maybe he holds the ball a little too long. So that all reminds me, and he's accurate. And that reminds me of Andy Dalton, but like a better version of it. I think it's an incredible case study

because I remember watching football when I was young and it was like, oh, Phil Sims finally turns a corner in his career in year five. Or, like, Joe Thysman had, like, years in a row where he wasn't even a starter. It's like, you didn't just give up on these guys and draft someone new right away. And Gino's a case where, like, I'm not saying,

he created a lot of his own issues. He wasn't excellent on tape when he was playing back in the day. But it's like these careers go through such biarrhythms and, like, giving up on these dudes. It's like, who else is sitting out there? that could be this version of Gino where you've just learned to bathe in the league for long enough. You feel more comfortable and your skill set takes over. I think that's a great point, Mark.

And it reminds me a little bit of Fitzpatrick because people think of Ryan Fitzpatrick in a certain way now. But until he got that chance in Tampa, really, I don't think that anyone would have thought he could have had a late career renaissance like he did. And he just got it through injury. And then you have this three or four years where actually, he played at a higher level for those three or four years than really any other point except for that one Buffalo. This happens to quarterbacks throughout their career. I mean, quarterbacks hit their prime in their 30s. Matt Ryan didn't win his first MVP until he was in that range. Matthew Stafford got so much better at that. Ryan Tannahill, I mean, that was that wasn't, he didn't go into the wilderness for four years, but I mean, he was ridden out of town.

Right. And then comeback player of the year and looking like it. And I think it's for similar reasons to Gino because I think you look at the way Gino wins. and his experience is his most valuable asset right now. I think he's just like a smart... He always showed an ability to go through his reads and stay calm, and that was the thing I liked about him, was like he was a real quarterbacky quarterback,

and that usually means success. But I think the fact that when your mind catches up to your physical skills, and I think that happened with Tannenhill, I think that happened with Ben Rathesberger late in his career, and that's why he got better. And now I'm struggling to find your list again. Give me Rogers' haiku just because, Sorry, I'm just, like, commanding you, like...

No, I like how this is operating. Give me a haiku! Aaron Rogers, agitated, peaved. Wait, is that New York Jets guy wearing a cheesehead? Just the way that game ended, just, you know, so bizarre. Oh, that's amazing. Tua, like you said, is 10th, and that's a tough one. I didn't count...

You can't please anyone, I don't mean you, but anyone with wherever you put Tua. You're going to just get everyone's going off on something. To me, I'd have them a little. slightly lower maybe based off his play, but not because he was hurt. How I thought of it was after about five weeks, it was just like, what is the average start from this guy like? And then whatever that, and then rank it that way.

In my own little head. Good way to do it. Cousin's 11th, you know. You like that! He's been 11th forever. Kyler, 12th, actually higher than I would expect. Do you sort of, we did talk about him a lot Tuesday. I think part of the reason is we put a little more.

on maybe his coach than him. And then Tana Hill 13th. Let's hear Tanna Hills. Ryan Tanna Hills' haiku is, for those thinking he'd be bounced by now from Malik Willis, Tanny lives. I don't know if many people thought he would be by now, but it got kind of dark there

when they drafted him, and it was like he talked about his off-season and how disconnected he felt they trade A.J. Brown away. It was like they were starting over. See, sometimes, though, the line breaks are surprising. And I like that.

And so this is my reading of Brian Tannhill's. For those thinking he'd be bounced by now for Malik, Willis. Tanny lives. See, I think, like, haikus are more of the visual when you read it on page. Okay. That's just my take. I don't know, though. I thought there was, like, a whole subculture of, like, how people read poetry in general.

I don't know if you're trying to, like, hoodwink the listener there by having them not know what. I mean, it does have that element to it. But sometimes you get the musicality. For those thinking Heed, I like that pause. Be bounced by now for Malik. I like that pause. And then Willis. Tanny lives.

I don't know. It's just like erratic and fun. I would have him higher, and I know he doesn't probably rate incredibly high in the advanced metrics. Actually, he has been ranking high in the completion percentage over expectation plus EPA per pass attempt. The Titans just don't throw the ball. I think he was second last time I saw. Wow. The Titans just don't throw the ball.

much. And yeah, in QBR, and I think PFF, he's mediocre this year. And he added, like, a two-year run where they were on top of the world where he would always rank, like, third in PFF, and they'd have to defend it. I just watch him every week. And kind of like Gino, I think he just makes good decisions. Like, he's a guy that you know what you're going to get, and there's a lot to that. And he makes more big throws than people realize. He's one of my favorite quarterbacks to watch. And I felt that way for a couple years, but I think there's a toughness to his game. He's willing to take a shot and fire it downfield. I could see his team. I could see his team. teammates love him for all that business, and, like, that's my kind of dude. Okay, yeah, the raw numbers are weird. Like, he has thrown half as many passes as Joe Burroughs. Yeah, he doesn't miss the game. Yeah, they also had a buy week. But heading into last week when Titans didn't play,

Tannenhill was tied for the league lead in games with a QB rating over 100 for this season with five out of six. They've had, like, they're streaking good halves in a good way. He's been sensational for, like, chunks of time in a row. Here's why I think he deserves to be even higher. I would probably have him eighth or ninth. I just think all the reasons that we give as excuses for all these other quarterbacks, he's got those in spades.

And people don't think of Ryan Tanil as a guy who improves his teammates, like lifts them. But I think he's at that level now. He's no longer close to the Dalton line. To me, his offensive line and the pass protection has been terrible the last two years. And he like makes it work. And his receivers aren't really that. good and he makes it work. I give him a lot of credit. Carr and Stafford are next. Garoppolo, Goff.

Wow, to me, those are all from the same generation of players too. I guess Stafford's a little older. Let's do Stafford at 15. AT&T ads should be fewer. Pick sixes should be fewer too. Oh, that's it. That might be the winner so far. That's a good one.

What about Little Caesar's ads? Little Caesar's ads. Well, you know, when you're dealing with a 5-7-5-syllable count, like, there's limited space to, it's like a less open field tweet. I think he's getting a little bit of credit for what he did a year ago, and the situation's tough because he's struggled. He has not looked good. I think it's with some of these guys, like, the floor is about to fall out if what

we see is what we're going to get. We'll talk about them when they come off the buy, but they were under center a lot more against the Panthers, and it really worked well. The numbers were great for Stafford under center. That was sort of more of the old basic Jared Gough offense. Our friend Maurice Jones-Drew, who does their broadcast, was saying McVeigh's got to stop being stubborn and realize, like, kind of go back to use that trope again.

Simplify. Uh-oh. Go back to the basics. But they were doing that, I think, against the Panthers, and it worked. All right. Jared Goff, Daniel, Joe. Jones, Marriota, and Dalton, 17 to 20. I've really cracked up checking the PFF numbers the last couple weeks

because Andy Dalton is fourth right now among their qualifying quarterbacks. I noticed that. It's funny because I think it's because they grade in such a way that made me like Tannahill and Gino, too, in that they just grade, like, pluses and minuses. And, like, he just has so few minuses that you're just like, oh, he pretty much does the right thing and he doesn't hurt you. It's been a good version of Dalton.

I also, I think that, you know... But he's not a lot of flash. Not a flash. I mean, also, the most exciting performance in the backfield came from Taysam Hill recently. Sort of like, got a sidecar doing stuff he could do and throwing a touchdown in that game. But Dalton's been really clean,

but, like, I do think there's a human element where it's like, I can't put Dalton at number four or five. No, that's preposterous. And there's no way he's even played at that level anyway. So if you wanted to give him some love, You could maybe put him ahead of Daniel Jones. I know he hasn't won many games. I don't know.

I think you've got him in just the right spot. And I was too hard on you last week with your Jimmy G. at 16. He's been steady too. He played pretty well. Well, I had him higher last week because he had had two, I thought, promising performances in a row. But then he came back to Earth a little bit. The start of the show here, though, is your haikus.

Let's go with, you're going to rip him off in a row. We're going to do something different. Three quarterbacks in a row. Jared Gough, Daniel Jones, and Mariotta. Okay, Jared Gough. Offed adequate Gough. Lucky there aren't 30 other Belichicks. Just because Belichick just owns him.

Daniel Jones, operating as a Sequin handoff robot who does just enough. That's maybe a little harsh on Daniel Jones. Sequin handoff robot is just a very poetic image. That's what pops. You want me to do Mariotto? Was that the third one here? Yeah. I flung a TD to Kyle Pitts, time to chill, fantasy Nimrods.

Ooh. Although I think from a real football angle, that was a nice development, too. I mean, it was, but you're right. I am getting, I've gotten annoyed by the whole, like, fantasy community, because I follow enough of them on Twitter, are, like, really mad at the Falcons and the Jets. They're just, like, really mad at Arthur Smith and Mike LaFleur for. running efficient offenses that aren't... They won't flacco back in there.

To throw more passes on everyone, right. It's not resulting in good fantasy numbers for anyone. But get over yourself. They're actually good offenses for what they need to be. Did you see Elijah Moore's tweet after the game on Sunday? I was unfortunate. Yeah. He said like, if I said what I really wanted to say,

it's like, if you say that, you might as well just say it because you've already said it. But he's like, I'm happy we're winning. But yeah, this sucks. You might want to say like That flacco guy We were throwing it for like 360 yards

And like three interceptions The game Is it different offense Can we get some like Music or sound accompaniment To when Mark reads this I'm going to read Andy Dalton's

How about that Andy Dalton Glowing Red Ginger Man Average skills Akey Back Tase him to start

No that was It was a bad reading. I made to change that too because I think we are getting closer to Dalton starting. Yeah, it looks like he's going to start on Thursday night. All right, your next five will say Trevor Lawrence, Russell Wilson, Matt Ryan moving up this week, Carson Wentz moving down. He has that injury, 24. Kenny Pickett's at 25. I got to say, the single most surprising ranking you had to me was Russell Wilson. I thought he would be even lower. Let's hear that sad music for the Russell Wilson haiku.

15 depressing. Yards after halftime is not what Denver paid for. I think that was good because it stripped away the artifice, like the poetry. You know what I mean? Like something needs to be flowery, have that image. In this case, everything is dark. And you just gave us like the simple, plain words of darkness. Yeah, I mean, so you would like to see him,

Well, you mentioned on our other show that you felt he was near the very bottom of the league, Russell Wilson. Who has played worse at quarterback than Russell Wilson this year? I'm going to go through your list. PJ Walker is on the list right now and whoever is the Panthers guy.

Yes. Davis Mills. I think I'd put Mills ahead of him. Cooper Rush, I'd put Cooper Rush ahead of him. I would say Cooper Rush's average game was better. Justin Fields.

We love our quarterback. I don't know about Justin I would put Justin Fields behind him. So that's 30. So that's 2. Bailey Zappy, I got to, Bailey Zappy's definitely ahead of Russell Wilson for me this year. I just want to see a little bit more. But just right now, Bailey Zappi's average game has absolutely been better.

Zach Wilson? I'd put ahead of him, not by a ton. And then, yeah. The way room looks beefy. So yeah, I think I'd have him 30. Wow. I mean, I just, I guess with Russell Will, I mean, he's looked terrible. He's in a terrible offense.

They had negative 13 yards after half time. The whole thing seems so broken that I don't hate what you're saying. I mean, he's going to sink like a stone if this is what he is right now, because I don't know how you go through another offseason. If this is Russell Wilson all season saying we're going to roll this whole thing out again. Now, you know, some of the numbers are closer to you. The EPA completion percentage over expected composite has him 26th out of 33, so a little closer to you.

completion percentage over expected similar. He's ahead of about five or six guys, QBR similar, and just the eye test and PFF, which to me is sometimes kind of similar, has them about, yeah, ahead of five or six guys. So either way, though, it's somewhere between our two rankings. I mean, it's surprising no matter what. I mean... It's great. Can you think of any example, and this is tough

that's putting you on the spot? I couldn't come up with anything in the history at least of the last 20 years when we're covering the NFL, like, has there ever been like something like this a dramatic falloff for a great, you know,

potentially Hall of Fame quarterback this fast? Certainly not while changing teams because that like hasn't really happened. That hasn't happened. I can't come up with anything. I mean, not if you look at Russell Wilson's age because he's not 42.

I would point to like a startling fall off a cliff was Brett Farve in 2010, but not surprising. It just was hard to watch. I mean, maybe. And even then he had kind of, fallen, he had declined pretty hard before that 2009 season

and that was like his resurgence, so it sort of made sense. I mean, I guess like, you know, it was depressing to watch another Bronco Peyton Manning during that Super Bowl season. His exit, like play, you know, be replaced by Brock Oswald. That was like a neck injury, an age too. True, but it was truly

shocking because he had shown no signs. The year before he was still like an all pro type of guy. But that's also I would say that's normal. There was a natural age going on there. Ben Roplessberger is a guy who age was like purely the reason he fell off a cliff. I mean, not surprising.

Right. But Wilson's still young. Like Wilson's not in that group where it's like, he's Daniel's age. Right. Right. He was at the age. Rathlisberger was a guy everyone said would age poorly. And the reality was he didn't.

That didn't happen until he was 38, 39. He was maybe playing the best football of his career at Russell Wilson's age. And they're pretty similar players. I think if you had to come up with the, I know, The size is so different, but in the running ability. But I think in some ways, they're about as similar as anyone I can come up with for Ben. But it's a unique case. And I also think this season especially, like, it's been, if they had been tucked away at 1 p.m. Eastern, six games in row,

a lot less people would be talking about it. But, like, it's been so visual and so island gamey and so in our face. Yeah, I'm not sure what to do with Trevor Lawrence. I think you have them in the exact right spot at 21. I don't know if he's hot and cold so much as just not there yet. And that's fine. Yeah. He's in the second year.

Some progress this year, certainly. I think you've got him in the perfect spot, which would be, it's weird, because he'd be a Dalton right now at 20 is kind of the Dalton scale. Dalton is the Dalton line right now, maybe on this list. And Lawrence, I would say, is like right at it. Right at it. Maybe he's one above it. Maybe he's one below.

You want to do Matt Ryan's haiku? Where are they all sad? Sad Autumn Brighter after Maddie Ice flings an absurd 58 throws. We'll get to it on Thursday, but Maddie Ice showed something. That was a great game.

It was a nice change for them. This just feels like poetry music to me. I don't know. Yeah. Not necessarily sad. I mean, it is sad, but... Yeah. I think you're a little hard on

your guy Jacoby Brissette. I think you're showing some of your some of your feelings there. 26. It's like you're harder on him. I think he played so great until last week.

I know he had some big time misses and that's why big time mistakes and key spots and that's why you couldn't put him in the top 10 where all the advanced stats would have had him before last week. But to me he would have been closer to like 15 going into last week

and so 26. And it was, and it was bad game out of him. There was no question about it. I just kind of think that maybe, like, what we just saw is the, like, more of the Jacoby percent we're going to see. But he also had three killer mistakes that prevented them from winning games. It kind of bothers me, but... Can we get the haiku for him, too? Jacoby passes 45 times. Chubh carries, 12. Pats, A-bomb Browns.

Trying out some new music there. No, I like that. I like that. That fit. You know, I was very basic. I don't know if Dan would have, you know, spiced it up. I just went straight through the list. We're hitting the bottom five.

Zach Wilson, pretty low for Zach. But I guess it makes sense. Hasn't played that much and hasn't done that much. Bailey Zappy, who's gotten better each week, Justin Fields, Cooper Rush, Davis Mills. And then PJ Walker, who I believe only completed one pass past the line of scrimmage, which is... You know, like 60 yards when he was taken out of the game there. That was a tough situation. I think nine of his completions were behind the line of scrimmage.

All right, our final two haikus we're going to do for the day. Let's end strong. Love these two. Cooper Rush at 30 and Davis Mills at 30. All right, here's Cooper Rush. Cooper Rush. time for Jera to leave a suitcase full of green bills in my locker

Davis Mills Mills Mills wondering if Easterby will return his REM CD That's another Easter egg one That's been exclusive to the pod listeners Been asked to be edited

I don't even want to go deeper into that joke I just love that image I just love it a strange team Jack borrowed that reckoning CD he's like yeah they have that

reckoning love that album from Davis Mills who's like very little of an REM fan I would imagine Davis Mills has been like a little disappointing to me this year

he's just not accurate deeper down the field and you just haven't seen the flash plays he's played like a perfectly competent backup at work worst, but he hasn't, he's, I think, shown less than a year ago.

He hasn't been bad. He hasn't been bad, but he's not good. I was expecting him to kind of be a favorite of mine and a nice surprise, and it's not really held true. The ball just doesn't go where he intends it to go, which is, like, the number one thing that bothers me when you're watching them each and every week, because you can never overcome that, unless you're Josh Allen, and then you become the greatest quarterback in the world.

And, yeah, Cooper Rush, who's on the practice squad, and there only means. making a million dollars. Give me a break for all the overpaid cowboys that they have over the year. They better give him, like, an assistant vice president job to, like, you know, charity in the offseason. Yeah, like, I went over the cap to look at where he ranked. And it's like, there are some absurd human beings making more than he is for what he's done this year.

Right. Some of them probably are not playing football. They're out of the league and they have guaranteed money. Yeah, Cooper Rush saved their season. And I think we've saved this podcast. Not that it needed it. I mean the whole around the NFL podcast. Oh, this individual spin-off show or bonus show.

I mean the whole enterprise. We needed an injection of surprise and daring do and haiku. And we've done it. We've done it this Wednesday. We've done it. Thank you, Grave-Digger. We credit you for that. Oh, no, don't do that.

Yes, fabulous idea. We're not really doing it. Fabulous producing and just a little something extra for the listeners. Hope you guys liked it. Let us know. And if you don't like it, don't let us know. That's how I'd like things to work. Don't get into our headspace with complaints. We will be back on Thursday and Friday with our regularly scheduled preview show

and Friday fun show. It was fun, Mark. I had fun. For Mark Sessler, Gravedigger. He'd the call. You know, So, This is an I-heart podcast.