Nip Tuck - Beauty & The Lisp

Episode Date: September 21, 2022

Why do us girls always take it too far when on our holidays? Lauren had a scary pool party in Ibiza and the girls have been getting love from trolls online.Plus, so many of you keep asking how best to find the right place to get some cosmetic work done, so we share our top tips for finding the best.To get involved with the show, you can send us a DM. We’re on Instagram and TikTok, find us @niptuckpod.Or you can email [e-mail] GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hi guys happy wednesday and welcome to nip tuck and not giving a fuck oh gosh feel so naughty saying that this is the podcast where we celebrate being positive aspirational women this is all about being unapologetically yourself i'm fucking joking you started i was eating crisps in the corner well that serves you right for being a fat bitch i looked at lucas then i was like oh my she started she's like hello I was like do you stink

you bought the crisps so it's my fault why are you acting like I've just had some fucking Seabrooks prawn cocktail I've had some like little tiny

shitty expensive crisps you're making it sound like I've had some fucking scampi fries Jesus mate what makes your breath smell the most being on a diet

I think when you're on a diet your breath fucking hums but isn't that when you're on keto your breath stinks isn't it

yeah so when I used smoke and diet and cry and drink black coffee i bet my breath fucking stunk i'm so shout out to anyone who snogged me during that time everyone in the office was like she's coming she's coming good morning guys how was your morning it's like when the teacher leans across the back with your coffee breath yeah well that was me and have i told you i've stopped smoking fully only when i've had a drink when you went to ibiza did you smoke uh yeah the whole time no no no not one not one we're vaping yeah i was i stole someone's vape which vape um one called an elf bar and it made me like laugh thinking like elf as in health is it meant to be that your elf

bar as in like where's my health bar because for ages he kept saying where's my elf bar and i thought he was saying my health bar like like a granola i was like i've not seen any granolas anywhere and he meant his fucking elf bar so then eventually where's my elf bar and i was like looking around like uh has he got a protein nutmeg i don't know i'm looking for something anyway yeah i smoked them but no i've stopped smoking so now i just smell of and i've certainly certainly not not eating so now it's just kind of coffee and olive crisps right lauren now shut you up um listen it's a podcast you meant to speak if she shut me up then it'd be shit okay so on nip tuck we want to get your voice heard you can send us a dm we're on instagram

and tiktok oh my god stop no it's in the life updates yeah like just hold your horses i'm overexcited okay so like i said you can send us a dm we're on instagram and tiktok find us at nip tuck pod or you can email hello at nip tuck pod.com we want to know what's been getting on your tits what's giving you the ick and any other bits embarrassing stories please my favorite go on then talk about right i don't even know where to begin this is traumatic like it's not funny it's traumatic okay so i've just been to ibiza for my friend's 30th yeah there's five couples we all stayed in a villa why would you stay in a villa in ibiza no guys like if you're listening can i just say especially as groups of girls it's actually not safe and it was boys as

No but I mean I know what you mean It's not safe Who is carrying the key For the front door When you're all Getting in at different times People get robbed out there

A lot There in Marbella I've heard And I'm always drunk Really bad It's just not very safe There's no clean towels Don't

This is what So I will not do that again There's ants in the kitchen There was Yeah So the only time That I would ever do that again Villa wise

Probably is if I stayed With the kids And like a family maybe Because it's easy For the kids Hotel is just always better But like the fact the washing up

I didn't go on holiday not that I did any but to fucking wash up so it's just not my bag really but anyway unless I went somewhere with a butler and a chef and all the rest of it

which we didn't so do you know what I mean when people go to the Caribbean and they stay in one with like a it's the clean towel situation for me but I think it depends

on the level and I think whose bum hole has been on this but what do you think happens at a fucking hotel you don't get a fresh one every time that's got pure arsehole on it

oh my god I'm never wiping my face again with a hotel towel it's got pure arsehole on it so I went sorry to interject you i went on a hen do to ibiza and i think there was about 25 of us and you should see the bed that i was on it was a camp bed and it was like a red like sofa cushion as my pillow

and i'm sure you can imagine the tantrum that i had and i called it casadel fritz and um everyone got really upset with me about yeah i bet they did because i bet they were like Listen, we're all having to deal with it. Shut up. So we get to the villa and on the first day we're all drinking around the pool. We've done the supermarket shop again.

The supermarket shop. No, not a vibe. So we did all that and we're all having a drink and all day we're pushing each other in the pool. The bodies are bombing in, back flipping in. Obviously I'm with the boys.

Sorry, Lauren. Never push people in the pool either. Why? I've got two friends that have lost all the front teeth. Oh, Ashley, you're such a boring bastard. Okay, fine. Anyway, well, I'll tell you the story.

So we're all jumping in. Everyone's just like having a laugh and it's all great. all day the bodies are being silly stuff like that i was doing stuff as well jumping him and then one of the boys um thought that he needed there's quite a lot of like bugs he was cleaning out the pool with um you know those long filler sounds good long stick with um what's it called a net a really long one so he's there and he's cleaning the pool one of the guys pushes him in kind of like jokey jokey he's got the net in his hand yeah but it wasn't he was just like where

you're in next there was no like honestly we were all pushing each other all day so he falls in and we're all like yay we finally got him he's a big guy he's not a little guy we're like yay we've got him finally and then he surfaces and he's like like this and i was like what and i swear i looked at him and the pool's starting to fill with blood right i'm not even lying i looked at him and i can see him constantly in my head he's got his arm up the pool the stick from the pool cleaner blunt and by the way not sharp is inside his armpit

by about this much he's there going like this and it's coming out of his armpit and there's blood starting to come in the pool and we were like

we're all obviously pissed we've been drinking all day so someone runs in gets him pulls it out no shouldn't they have left it in no no no

he had to get it out he said fuck me it was like this long he couldn't have got out of the pool he had to get out dragged him out he was like get a towel ring an ambulance

so I'm like ring an ambulance my friend's ringing an ambulance Lauren was just and i was just like no i was really good i got a towel he was like phone and he's a big guy so you kind of know that he's not he's not a pussy and he was like ringing ambulance now ringing he was like it's pulsing so we're thinking fuck it's not like it's pulsing it's like i can feel it pumping the blood's pumping so we lay him down the the the scar i'm gonna say two inches by five this sort of big i can see the flesh hanging out of his arm he's got his arm

up and he's like going kind of going in and out of consciousness my friend's on did you put pack it up yeah yeah so we got a towel packed it up got i think tied it really tight around him and he's there and guess what he said get me my elf bar swear so he's sucking on this elf bar um where all like little ants running around his girlfriends in the kitchen losing a fucking head he says is it bad how do you even ring an ambulance and i didn't know so that's why i thought were you googling no i thought i'm not having that job i was like i'm gonna sort this out somebody ring an ambulance because I thought

I don't know who you ring so my friend's on the phone to the ambulance anyway yeah but what do you does anyone know if anyone needs to know it's 112

if anyone ever needs to know so it's 112 and the ambulance were amazing but they took about half an hour to come and we're thinking he's gonna fucking die

like honest to god it was so so frightening where was the villa far out far out 20 minutes out that's the other thing as well exactly it was so

it's a mood killer isn't it a mood fucking killer we'd only just got there woo we beat the baby we'd only just got there and this happened and we're all, like, drip-wired.

Everyone sobers up. Anyway, ambulance comes, takes him away. He had to have an operation. They said it was three... What, put to sleep? Yeah. He'd been drinking as well. They said it was three millimetres from his artery.

He would have died. Was he in hospital the whole trip? No, just overnight. Came back like a fucking soldier. But then he had his arm in a sling the whole time, bruising everywhere. So, yeah. Woo!

But apart from that, was it okay? Yeah, great. Well, I'm going to. bet you you're not doing it how i did it are you do you know what can i just tell you something everyone as we were walking into recording today ashley was talking to me about a b3 and she's like do you know i think i'm gonna do like we're gonna get a driver and security because it's just so much it makes sense doesn't it as if it was like a totally normal thing that an average person she just has no yeah but you've got no fucking idea did you all hear the ed watch story but you've

got no idea of the real world she was like so i think we're gonna get security um we're just going to get security and a driver check the cost of that and just imagine that's not a normal thing to do yeah but it's safe yeah if you can afford it absolutely why not but it's just the way you don't have any fucking clue that that isn't a normal attainable thing for somebody i know but it's actually it is shit and scary now that you do have to think things like that no i agree so you will i've done it before where there's been security they actually take you to the toilet it's really good i can wait for you outside i agree so don't get me wrong i'm saying it's a great idea um only you would do that meanwhile i'm getting people are getting fucking speared in

my pool like and you and you're getting your security have you seen that watch crime london instagram oh my god that guy nearly got his wrist cut off his watch actually terror like every day they're uploading like this just happened outside sexy fish this just happened here and it's literally it's like the wild west isn't it it's so fucked up it's scary it really is it's scary and the thing is a lot of people like oh wear a fake watch instead doesn't matter because they don't know it's fake they see you looking like you've got money and you've got an expensive watch on you're fucking do you remember when we went south africa and they were like don't even wear fake diamond earrings and stuff they were like literally just like not even cubic zirconia

they were literally like don't wear anything so do you know when me and ashley went to south africa we came home in the boot of a taxi once didn't we yes that was awful yeah because there wasn't space and they didn't give a fuck so me and ashley got in the boot and it was like around the mountain yeah and we were just rolling around in the boot do you remember awful right so life updates hey tell me i've told you mine my frightening story yes yes yes that's what i wanted to say so we've gone viral on tiktok um i don't know what do you what what like do you call viral i would say viral is over 500 000 views i don't know would that be viral what's viral like no no i don't think it is really because i think we're small fry we've gone baby viral i think big viral

is like millions and millions we've gone baby viral um but it is it is nice and what it is what's really funny is i was on holiday also this is such a dickhead move ashley texted me while i was on holiday saying whatever you do don't read the comments on tiktok i didn't even know anything about the fucking comments on tiktok i didn't even know that it was on that i didn't even know We didn't even know we had a TikTok until the other fucking day. She's like, whatever you do, do not. They will really upset you.

It's bad. So obviously, straight away, I'm like, what comments? And I go on there. Levin, why would you read them? Why would you text me telling me not to? I didn't, I was blissfully, I was busy waiting for the ambulance. I had no idea.

So anyway, one of the comments that really, really made me laugh that was put on that TikTok is, poor fucking girl. She's had that much filler in her lips. She's got a lisp. no she had the lisp I've had the lisp forever

I've got the filler I agree so I was reading it out to my friends and they were crying they were like you've had a lisp since the day I've met you

and someone was like yeah poor girl that much filler she can't even speak properly and I was like oh that's fad that's really that's really

that's really it's fad me because I've always I've always had a lisp like and somebody messaged me saying in a laughing way that I sound like Donna

from two pints of lager and a packet of crisps that packet of what? two pints of lager and a packet of crisps did nobody did nobody fucking hear me there? I was seeing someone

once whose name started with an S the first and the end how bad but yeah that was one of the funny things but everyone went mental why do you think

they all had so much to say Ash on that particular video what was the video like tell us it was very people were being sexist towards us

someone's comment the worst one that was bad for me was someone put single mums are the root of all evil no the guy

who left the woman in the shit is the root of all evil what the fuck oh women that are raising a child, you evil bitches. Without being married.

How dare you raise a child with love and affection and care, you silly bastard. Do you know what I mean? Like, what? Are you, these fucking people. But,

TikTok, you get trolled on a lot more. Do you know what? I didn't, I wasn't bothered. You get trolled a lot more. I still stick by what I was saying, but what,

some of the things that were annoying me were, some little bastard wrote, how about, this is the problem, these women just have kids with anyone nowadays, won't even let them

put a ring on it first. so I commented back like I was married stop commenting I can't help it because I was married first like I just think

oh you're disgusting I was married and then obviously but they don't listen to the pod so they don't understand the context no and that's fair enough but TikTok is shocking

at how much unsolicited opinions and advice comes out of there you just have to we're just gonna have to like let it roll someone said that I look like Pete Burns

do you remember when someone trolled me and they were like oi it's on the tell of a star she wants her face back i was like oh i've not done anything i'm just drinking my just drinking my little latte i haven't done anything wrong like why are people so adverse to like looking like looking after yourself and also who gives a fuck if i get work done when i look in the mirror i'm happy i'm nice to people i'm kind

yeah like doesn't really matter about anything else but yeah tiktok yeah that was a new place for us a new place um we're still learning i think i can handle people being nasty but if they start like saying nasty things about appearance i'll die i can't handle people saying nasty things about parents but if they say things about my life then that i'm the other way around i can handle the live stuff like whatever the appearance i will literally like podcast what's the worst trolling you've ever had uh oh god i do you know what i don't get it in the dms too bad really it's just on that website yeah i've not looked at when like ages ago um it hurts a bit when they were like um poor fear what a shit mom that's oh no i'm never with my kids yeah that was

quite painful because i'm like poor fear like a poor little theater of a mom like that that yeah yeah not really and also right can can can i just okay i've been reading this book it's called why men don't love women like you and there's a it's written by a man and there is a massive massive section on it about how deep-rooted sexism is in the world and it's a massive massive problem so men are always brought up and taught if you don't like something fuck it off if you don't want to do something don't do it yeah you go for it son like you're incredible you can do whatever you want if you and basically men's route is just to find happiness and they go after that whereas women girls are brought up initially from be a quiet little girl get on with things

be nice to everybody yes make a nice home get a husband look after a male husband get a male husband look after them and your worth is judged on how well you look after your husband then they might not leave you yeah and then you're lucky if they don't yeah and if they do leave you then you're fucked yeah so this book honestly all the stuff it was saying in there and it was written by a man it was written by a man and he said women are in such bad competition with each other oh my god which is so so deep rooted so it's very rare to find another woman that will go she looks amazing she's doing really well

for herself thank god she left that wanker instead it'll be how much work has she had done oh she got split up

with now she's a fucking single mum not so clever now is she oh she's on holiday again leaving her children what a fucking man

ever get questioned about how many kids he's got with who where he's going on fucking holiday where he is even during the day

how much he drinks at the weekend it's alright for a guy to have a pint with his Sunday dinner but if a woman's having a drink of wine then she's always

drinking around the kids so the moral of what I'm saying is guys read that book it's really really really I know I'll send you the section

so you can just read that just screenshot this but also if you're bringing up girls if you're a girl like it's not just about like being single getting into a relationship

this is a whole like lifestyle change and we all need to start putting these measures in place yeah it might be nice to have a little bitch every now and then

about someone never with a kid right no because by you saying that you're generationally adding on to that and then moaning about equal rights well mate, a minute ago

you were slagging Lucy down the street off for going on holiday with her mates and leaving her children and now you're saying you should be paid the same as men it's all connected and you're moaning about your maternity leave's not long enough yeah, it's all connected you can't moan about one thing but I do agree, it is hard

but you can't moan about one thing and then look at it in a bigger picture and I do agree in the fact that women tear each other women tear each other women down and we all want

to be successful as females or whatever but then we don't want each other to be successful no so how men don't fucking do that

when men have you ever seen a man trolling another man's picture never and when men see a man doing well and I'm talking in general they think

oh what's he got I want to get that how can I work harder to get that I am jealous in a way nice car nice watch

how can I get that what business are you into and then they go home and think I want that fucking car how do I get the car they clap when they win yeah

whereas women clap when they fail yeah look at another woman and think nice handbag nice life whatever

and instead of thinking prostitute prostitute yeah it must be from a man married to someone rich married to someone rich because god forbid

she did it herself and do you know why that is because they don't want to sit there and look at their own sad little life yeah they'd rather get on the computer

and they would rather find an excuse as to how a woman is successful rather than she's just successful because then they look at themselves

and think i'm not successful so they make excuses as to why other women do well yeah and if other women are doing well instead of thinking how have you done that can i get that they think that's shit because they it's all they don't understand and it's like very passive aggressive all built it's all about themselves it's how they feel yeah and i think that is people project on to other people yeah anyway wow we just got really far too philosophical for you guys but i i enjoyed that did you i'm out of breath i've gone busy um and so we had the tiktok my nanny has been on holiday there was a week where i had no day or night so did you have an idea of what real people have to do

yeah and it's fucking hard so hard this morning um i oh my god i've not said yet this morning my boyfriend didn't bring my makeup home from his i left it there my entire makeup collection that you'd left it there no he was meant to bring it his fault so I had to do my makeup this morning

with about four pieces of five year old makeup that was my mum's like collection 2000 you look great and Ash had an MUA and I replied like fuck off blah blah

and she said bitch we've all got the same hours in the day this is the woman who normally has a nanny then this morning she sent me a voice note and she was like

I'm so tired I've been up all night with the kids how's it been without a nanny um hard two is hard i can imagine i can imagine and also one that is at the coloring on the walls stage while the other you you know might die if you leave it in a room by itself so then it's not just like it's like they're cleaning up after them blah blah blah blah so i don't have my night

nanny anymore have you not got her at all well the baby is four and a half months old now does it sleep through no no no so i don't have her um and i would actually have another baby right now just to get her back really yes yes yes yes you need your sleep don't you makes it how often does he wake up now uh i just put him in bed for meals yeah i used to do that so does he wake up like here and there and like or is it just a constant yeah he wakes up yeah like a little cat it's not like full grown I wish he was still like toffee

so it's like a full night thing and then like Saskia last night fell out of her own bed isn't that fucking funny he's like mommy

around and it must really shock them why every time they do this I laugh how have they not learned

how do you fall out the fucking bed how have they not learned they're tiny the bed's massive how did they they slept on my floor last night

aww because she wanted to be near you yeah so she came in from her own room and then we do a thing now called floor bed because I'm trying to

not let her in my bed so she sleeps on my floor like a little dog and then I'm just stopping her constantly getting in my bed she must really love you to sleep on the floor

she does imagine I fell out under her Saskia's actually good now she sleeps like all night in her own bed yeah you did it quite early

didn't you yes I did but she's still got a dummy How old is she? Three and a half. I think Thea was three and a half when I did it. Because their teeth start getting fucked. They start getting those goofy dinosaur teeth.

They get dummy teeth. They're horrible. Have you ever seen a kid and it's like... It's the dummy teeth. Dummy teeth are awful. And Thea started getting them and I looked at her and I thought, ooh, I took it off her. Well, this is why I don't show my kids on Instagram.

That's why she doesn't. Because a child's got rabbit teeth. How are you going to take it off her? She's good. She only has it at night time. Okay. So, like, when I say something, like, blah, blah, blah's coming around later, she's got a little drawer that she hides them in.

Like, because she's ashamed of it. She knows she shouldn't have it. They used to get it and go like this. But do they go through that phase where they won't let you put the clothes that they need to wear on? That's never, that's it now. That isn't a phase. That's having a female child.

That's a girl. That never, ever changes. It's like, I want to wear this piece of shit today. and then you match it with this piece of turd and then to finish it off I want a flowery hat and some shitty boots

and then I'm going to finish it with a little smear of your makeup. And I'm going to put some cliffhanger earrings in. Polyester Disney shit. Yeah. 24-7.

Don't buy it then, they can't. Yeah, I'm going to have to throw it all away. And then they can at least make a bad outfit choice but with decent stuff.

Yeah, but I always look at your Instagram and I think how have you made it look so nice? Like mine, it literally is still in party dress phase.

Just don't have any of that in the house. that's the way to do it she's just told me now that she doesn't like tracky bottoms honestly my life was fucking over

and when I pull things out of the wardrobe she goes eh disgusting how does she how do I go right you can choose between this or this

disgusting disgusting that's really funny so what do you do I'm like babe it's Gucci I say things to her I'm like well you can if you want

you can wear that but you look ridiculous oh she wouldn't give a fuck and no Thea does so she'll be like yeah I'm not bothered and then she'll be like I'm gonna change into this

I'll say to her well you can if you want we look stupid I wasn't going to laugh at you that's like you're a child the funny thing is with Thea she's so switched on she's like my best mate

so like I do my mum sometimes says Lauren she's four because I'll be like well I did tell you and like we'll have these like little arguments

and disagreements sisters yeah we're like sisters where I'll say to her like yeah well if you'd have thought of that and we have these little things so yeah

she's hard fucking work but they're worth it now what do you edit your pictures yeah yeah same not like

I don't edit them to the point of like who the fuck's that but so for example we all know someone who does it and then she'll put no makeup today

and you're like absolutely no shade we all do it no shade and I hate people that call people out and everyone says even if you put

a Paris on it you're editing your picture I mean I do like a little tiny sprinkle of face app I used to do Facetune but now I just use

face app so I don't i'm the opposite so i use face i only use face app if it's a beautiful picture and everything's perfect and my face is like i don't do face up very often and mainly we'll go on face and i'll smooth like my skin a little bit and that's honestly pretty much it unless it's like a terrible picture and i need a bit of something else right but whatever but anyway everyone can do it i'm not asked and also i got left behind when everyone started doing it and i was like what yes you were like oh my god such and such is looking really well yeah yeah profilo yeah

is this what profilo does what are these people having done they look amazing yeah so yeah kim k has been called out for again face tuning her shoulders why what was wrong with them um she diarrhea on them lauren um like let me show you one sec so basically i feel really sorry for kim k though because do you know what her head must be fucked she gets like criticized ridiculed every day so at the same time can we really blame her for editing her shoulder on instagram because if she didn't then everyone would be like kim k has butcher shoulders yeah like straight away kim k grows new shoulder it would show like she would be slated immediately right let me show you this picture before after right if anything i've preferred a shoulder before weird isn't it she's

literally just pulled it up a little bit so it doesn't dip i much prefer it before but yeah kim k whatever no shade like just she got you don't like your shoulders just get rid of them okay guys so we're gonna take a quick break we're gonna tell you all about our competition and we also have some beauty tips coming up next so guys welcome back now i'm sure you've seen on our instagram we have got a really cool competition that you are going to want to enter so if you guys head over to at nick tuck pod you can get the chance of winning some selfridges vouchers some laser hair removal some skincare hair some pajamas a stunning necklace there is loads more on there go over to the post to check

it out those prizes all together lauren do you know what they're worth no i can't add up but i reckon between one and two thousand pounds absolutely so decent that isn't it just for one it's amazing entries close on the 18th of september at midnight all you have to do to enter is tag a friend on the post and make sure you both follow at knit tuck pod plus the instagram pages of the brands who are giving away these absolutely incredible prizes okay so loads of you want advice from us and i can completely understand why um from me especially so a lot of it the time is to do your live boyfriends whatever but a lot of it is image related product related surgery related which to be honest is where nip tuck name came from so i think we need to remember to do

more of that we start like from scratch of our relation to cosmetic surgery do you want to do that right now and tell everyone if they don't already know yeah because people might know what the fuck's this nip tucky thing okay ash do you want to tell us a brief i can't do brief you can't right okay why we know much so much about cosmetic surgery the industry surgeons that type of thing and why the name nip tuck began yes so about 10 years ago actually was when me and lauren met and we worked at a cosmetic surgery group together one of the biggest ones worked there together for about five years and we were working as patient coordinators so that role entailed looking after the surgeons looking after the patients from start to finish we would sit in

on consultations with them we'd try implants we'd liaise with the hospital with the nurses it was a hard job if our patient had a problem afterwards they would ring us at six in the fucking morning sometimes thank you sarah smith um i'm in pain you've just had your tits done go back to sleep um but yeah that kind of thing and it would go on literally if they had a problem afterwards to the to the fucking death i had people at 10 years like oh you were a patient coordinator 10 years ago it went on that far because we was we were so good we were good at it so that's how really good at it yeah so we worked um there together at one of the biggest ones then i moved over to a competitor and left lauren and i stayed there for another five years i

continue to drag the company on my shoulders for another 10 years while making them copious amounts of money I went on to another one and then I actually went on to being a manager of a private hospital doing all kinds of surgery you did you did everything there so I've worked in medical and cosmetic stuff for years and then you've done I went back again to work um privately with a surgeon chaperoning so I was there in all the consultations and stuff like that so we've seen it all we've just seen it all haven't we literally i feel like the knowledge the bad the ugly they were ugly and they're not ugly anymore the smelly i once had um i had to help a surgeon it was 10 o'clock at night this is a kind of shit no this is the kind of shit that happened right

when i work we work for that company there's so much stuff we could say and then they it was like 10 o'clock at night a patient coming like an emergency one they needed a seroma draining so that's where you get a buildup of fluid in in an area because the tummy tuck it's common so what they do is they put a little hole in it they put um a uh what i'm trying to say syringe in and then they suck out of an empty syringe and fluid comes out so i was assisting him i shouldn't have been probably but i was there and i was helping him i was stood next to him helping him like there was no one else there it was 10 o'clock at night it was my patient and it was disgusting but i just pretended it was fine and as he turned he knocked um the bowl of fluid all over me so i was stood

there covered i forgotten what the point of this was but we were there we've seen it all we've seen it all so and we've had it all done we've had it all done we've seen it all and i did used to give quite open honest advice that's how my instagram built up isn't it um i've changed my opinion on that and your approach have you having seen i've never done that that's never been my thing it's always been yours but having seen how it worked for you and also in all honesty having seen how things can change so you can give an opinion on something and think it's amazing and you do all your research me and you and you say i love this product or i love this surgeon and then a few years later things can change new products come out better products come out better treatments

come out but you've already said how good something was now when it comes to products we expect that don't we time evolves love it love it fine you can like one and then be like i'm not that keen anymore yeah whereas when it comes to surgery you recommend a surgeon and then you've from from your genuine experience you've had no problems with them you've seen amazing results and then one day it turns out that they do something wrong somewhere you're responsible you're responsible then and this is a problem that we had when we worked at that company you're then responsible for advising this person to operate on a load of people and it's just not why would you you're not getting paid for it why would you put that on your shoulders and also people need

to make their own decision because you can't blame anyone else if it's not what you wanted hours in the day but we haven't though we haven't so here is our question would love to hear on the podcast more about surgery as to how to start looking for a surgeon how to know where's good to go as i have absolutely no clue where to even start looking very common i know that ashley said a few weeks ago she's recently had the brow lift and upper blephs i would love to hear more about that or about other surgeries what do you think was worth it what you wouldn't do again can I just say something really quick here one thing that really annoys me um people used to come into that old company and I use this as kind of an example and they say have you got a price list

right obviously we didn't so that to me is somebody that isn't going in there with a specific problem that has bothered them for years they just want to see what can I have done oh yeah go on I love that then that and so this question I know that's not what this question is when it kind of says Or it was this, Lauren, what do I need done? What do I need done? Like, no. And this question where it says, like, what do you think was worth it, wouldn't do again, absolutely agree and we'll talk about all that.

But I think you just have to be really careful that you are going to look for surgery that because you look in the mirror and you see something that really bothers you, not like, ooh, I could have that. Ooh, yeah, we'll have that. Ooh, she said that was good, so I'll have that done. It has to be something that you yourself have wanted for a long time. And also, can I just say, for example, it looks so easy to go in and say a breast augmentation boob jobs are for life not just for valentine's day right i swear

like the amount of people used to come in and get their girlfriend tits for valentine's day it's fucking wrong do you remember and i had to wrap an implant for someone um right okay so boob jobs one boob job has never lasted someone a lifetime no absolutely never you're gonna have to have at least four or five throughout your life a minimum i reckon you can drag it to three i have a three already but that's what i mean anyone telling you a boob job last 10 years is lying no i think you you've got more chance some people can get longer than others but it's not gonna last you your life no way so there's a little example now when you start researching a surgeon guys the worst place to go is google okay google for example i don't know best washing

machine whoever throws the most cash at it comes up first so if you google boob job manchester the groups are going to come up first because they can throw the most cash at it everything you see on google is marketing so don't do that facebook is actually the best place google could be a place to start and get your first list yeah so you go on google you write down 10 names then you begin your research because obviously the better they are the bigger the marketing budget yeah um so go on there but from what i've heard of patients and i've had a lot there is another website that you can look for cosmetic surgery on and it's also an app it's almost like a forum isn't it it's the same thing as google yeah the surgeons can get reviews off there they can add

reviews on there they can promote their listing they can manipulate the whole thing i think it probably started quite a genuine thing did and then they started making money money money money and then surgeons started paying to have things on, off, higher and now I think it's just been advertised. How fucked up is that? It is fucked up, isn't it? It's not like buying a lipstick. No, it's surgery.

So if you find a website that appears to be like a forum discussing different surgeons in a really open way, pinch of salt. Why is that website there? Yes. Pinch of salt. Yeah, exactly. So I have heard that Facebook is a good, safe space to have a look.

Okay. and you can speak to real patients on there as well um so would you just search for the surgeon in the top bar well the way so for example my eyebrow lift and blephs that i've just had done last last month the way in which i found out about that surgeon was when i was working doing aesthetics a lot of my clients had been to him yeah and it was literally could see them word of mouth then not everyone has got that opportunity but then even when you get the word of mouth go on every review platform there's a really scary thing whereby you can take down google and yell reviews did you know that and there is a section that you can see how many were taken down

so i went after i was like right okay i've seen three of these they look quite good and then um i googled it and i was like right okay yeah so that's my little bit of advice and also just mark some time out like three hours at least to sit and do it before you make any decisions and And maybe split that time up a little bit because your head can get fucked. So maybe do an hour, then another hour. I always, and I do this, totally not the same, but with holidays, when I'm doing hotels and stuff,

I know, I know, that's my thing. It's what I'm good at. I start with a big list. I whittle down, down, down, and then pros and cons of the last two. And that's how I work it out. And I think that's another way of doing it. Start with a list of people, whittle it down,

and then always have two to three consultations. Red flags. You can get in really quickly with them. yes if you can get straight in there with them then why why second red flag pushy sales pushy if you ever get a phone call and trust me i know because i used to do this fucking job yeah we did you get a phone call that says there's been a cancellation or a discount pounds off red flag yeah because there's a reason for this sometimes it's genuine but still disorganization before you've actually even given the new money yeah red flag absolutely bad patient care before you've

even been seen yeah no which i've experienced from time to time in my job and not always agreed with no red flag definitely so um yes tell us about your experience with turkey okay so i went to turkey reason being i had my boobs done for the first time i think we've kind of spoke about this before but we'll do it again because a lot of people yeah don't know everything so i got my boobs done when i was 19 um they were pretty saggy don't know why from weight loss weight like i had stretch marks and they were a bit tubular so i had like puffy nips they were don't fucking laugh mate um tubular have you seen your nipples recently she my nipples are back to normal look oh they weren't in the picture you sent oh yeah okay it was a bad picture um so yeah i they were

just i just had shit tits and i don't know why so i had them done i had an uplift with an implant by the way no one's tits are shit she just didn't like hers okay well you know what I mean sores but mine were just

not what I wanted they were all functional breasts oh my god so for example I showed my mum she went

oh god yes that's what okay so that's what will work at 19 I was like I need them she's like

don't be silly I took my bra off and and I broke my toes so my mum was like oh yeah okay so I got them done toffee

let's fuck off wait till my mum knows I've spoken about toffee so i got them done and and they were bigger and still pretty saggy left them for a few years thought these are not good got them done again um then they were all right my nipples were like this big though and then i had um i had fear and they sagged a bit more they began to get rippled i don't know if anyone's seen rippling oh my god my nipples are getting erect can you see because

i'm touching them um where a novel of lauren's boob jobs by lauren wow anyway anyway so they were at a point where i'd have to they were quite shit and i needed someone really fucking they were quite shit they were quite shit i need someone really good to fix them now having worked with surgeons in the uk for however many years and seen loads of them and I'll say this out loud and I'll say it proud I think uplifts in the UK

aren't that good an uplift is a big deal it's a big your incision on each breast is like that long round the nipple down underneath

round down underneath and I don't in my experience and through my research I haven't seen many uplifts in the UK that I think they look like they've been

with a knife and fork Edward Scissorhands so I would say I don't think they're that great I don't think they go that high I think they still look saggy

yours look brilliant look at mine I've got no bra do you know what i mean like so can i throw a glass of water at you oh you might as well so um wet t-shirt con so i went to turkey the reason i went to turkey was not because it was cheaper in fact i would rather have been in the uk it was a fucking ball yes it was and i can't remember how much it was four and a half grand maybe that's really cheap so like that'd be like 12 and a half here probably yeah because i had to have my implants out new implants in full

reconstruction it was a big job and i had fat transfer to my breasts as well so we took some fat probably like a teaspoon i don't even know where from i couldn't tell you to this day where from like a teaspoon amount did you not ask i don't know i don't know um and then turkey great for surgery and he put it over my implants so that i've got rippling yeah so he stopped that but the reason i went to him was word of mouth i've got an insta friend you know we have these insta friends so this man had done daniel lloyd's breasts which she's openly put on there so i'm happy to say a couple of tv programs saying that she had really big problems with them she went to a uk she had huge problems yeah yeah so she went there and i thought well if they can fix someone

who's had these problems then he can probably fix mine it was the encapsulation so i did my research and i thought you know what his uplifts are better than any i've seen in the uk and i don't want to keep doing this and not it's not the technique he uses i also don't know the answer to that it must be it must honestly so i went over there i must say it was a ball ache um because child care child care and all that i had to leave the air for like eight days because it was covered as well i had to go two days before for the covid test but the actual experience in all honesty was good the pa was fucking incredible um whatsapp there yeah she was so helpful so good um absolutely amazing um when i got there the hospital was nicer than any of the hospitals that i've stayed in for

surgery in the uk it was like a hotel it was clean it was marble could they talk english only issue was this the nurses they were lovely but didn't speak great english so my mum was on google translate so she was like talking into the phone and saying she is in pain and then it was saying it in turkish to them and they were like oh okay so that bit was a bit difficult then i went back to a hotel but had drains so i had these drains going going into carrier bags they hurt so much and they hurt and i had to go back to the hotel with these drains and then i had to stay in the hotel room i would say it was quite traumatic because i was in pain and i wasn't at home i wanted to be at home you want to be on your own loo you want to have your home comforts you want

of fall asleep and know that a maid's not coming in yes that bit was traumatic the journey home your maid the journey home was quite traumatic as well um because i was in pain it hurt how many days after did you go home that's not okay so that kind of thing so who took the stitches out um a nurse in in england we i know a nurse thank god i know loads of nurses don't ask so she did it in a clinical environment to me sounds really okay so listen the issue i have with turkey is this and this only not the surgeons if you do your research any country you go to you get your bad you get your good and it's just like the uk you do your research there are shit surgeons in turkey as well that will fuck you up so you find kill you yeah but they could kill you in the uk as well

yeah but you do hear more about that true do your research no matter what country you're in surgeons are surgeons that's good and bad mine was a very fucking good surgeon being put to sleep secondly my only other issue the care i found fantastic the hospitals were so much more up to date than in england however the issue i had was the aftercare so when you fly back home who's changing your dressings you are prime for infection afterwards who's changing your dressings who's checking you've not got an infection who's doing your wound care who's looking after you if you've had lipo who's doing your massages who's all these things you're not near your surgeon you can't ring them and be like listen my tits exploded can i pop in for a minute there's none of that that's

however i do think that there are now companies that are starting which i think is a fucking good idea yeah and i wish i'd thought of this aftercare so you get the package you come back and they liaise with your surgeon and they do your aftercare i reckon you could fly home because you're still like off your head a little bit so that's my main issue with turkey it's the after one of my friends went to turkey recently um for some body sculpting and um she had some other bits done they left blue stitches in her which are meant to come out on day five to seven she got a really bad infection ended up in the nhs and they were she was messaging them and they said to her eat salad and drink water so like let's see this is what i mean you can't judge

one person's experience or something yeah do you know what i'm really happy with my eyebrow lift i've had my nose done i've had my boobs done twice i've had lipo twice you've been happy with everything pretty much no you've had no botched jobs no thank god and i am happy that i went to turkey because my tits are so good and i've picked a good surgeon but you can't go off someone else all i would say is you need a good surgeon and good aftercare and i think that's tick tick tick right so she's asked here what we would and wouldn't do again what we felt was worth it and not okay so i would have my blephs done again i thought that was amazing so happy i got those done i wouldn't have j plasma again which is a skin tightening treatment where they put it's

almost like lipo but they don't take the fat they put a cannula inside the radio frequency to tighten your skin it did absolutely fuck all it absolutely killed um i did it when i got my boobs done it was horrible don't do that crap ashley what would you have done again and what wouldn't you bother with blephs yeah i honestly really rate that teeth a great like i have spent a lot of money on my teeth and i can warrant every single piece what wouldn't you do what did you think was a waste of your money i know what you're gonna say the first one you say it fat injections i thought you were gonna say when you had lipo for the first time oh yeah when i had lipo the first time i had body jet lipo and it was absolutely crap shite shite a week off work so painful when i went back

for my review I was like how much did you get out then half a can of coke yeah do you remember laser lipo and stuff like that

that was all that doesn't work if you're going to do it and go through the pain cool sculpting stop getting it done stop thinking that you want I'm going to go less invasive

because just don't do it at all it costs the same and it's not good anyway enough enough but we will continue

on another episode of this do you like hearing that guys I think they yeah I think they like that do you like it tell us you like it huh huh

can I get a hi yeah okay guys so remember on nip tuck we want you to get your voices heard you can send us a dm you can send us a tick can you send a message on tiktok you could troll us on tiktok like everyone else if you want you could send us a troll um yeah you can dm us you can email us on hello at nip tuck pod.com uh at loads of ways we're thinking about getting a phone so you can actually just get in touch with us like that with voice notes because we love them but leave it with us now we'll be back with a bonus episode of nip tuck this friday and it is all about your ics and dilemmas so if you send something in now you might get it featured on friday's episode

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