Nip Tuck - Bonus Babes: Boy Math

Episode Date: October 6, 2023

As always, Ashley and Lauren are here to help answer your dilemmas (no matter how weird and wild), like what to do if your fella is secretly stalking models on his insta, what to do if your ex is demanding the kids at Christmas and yet again we hear more updates on the squirting scandal.To sign up for Patreon for more exclusive content and full video episodes, click this link: https://patreon.com/niptuckpodTo get involved with the show, you can send us a DM on Instagram and TikTok, find us @niptuckpod.Or you can email [e-mail] can also send us your beauty questions, dilemma's and Slutty Susan confessionals via WhatsApp! You can text or voice note the girls on [phone] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If it feels scary to jump, that's when you jump. Don't fight with a pig, because you both get dirty. And the pig likes it. And the pig fucking loves it. When it feels scary to jump, that's when you jump. Right. Right, let's go. Do it in a rock style.

I don't know what a rock style accent is, because I don't live there. So I'll do you like... Where's the birth certificate? I'll do you like... Burnley. Burnley. Burnley. I'll do you.

hello i'll do you i'll try and do a bit of a ready steady let's go hello and welcome to nip talk not giving a fuck bonus baby that's a bit like baby baby that's a bit like where i'm from and they say car social like my friend emily's horrific for it and emma by the way um they go like this no i've seen it in the car like that they say car like car and they say no do you know what i mean burnley burnley they're not from burnley i'm actually from rosendale and they'll say rosendale oh my god okay so this is the podcast where we celebrate being positive aspirational women that's i think that's what they talk like anyway this is all about being unapologetically yourself now on nip tuck we want now then now after that weird intro

come see your dad come to your dad in the pub do you remember scampi fries you always talk about scampi i'll never get over them i'm obsessed i've never eaten the way they burn your tongue i love the bacon version the same company does the bacon and cheese is a bacon it's got a bit yeah yeah and the carpet with all sticky floor i love fucking christmas for christmas pubs i love a christmas pub with a fire on the i just love i love the little glasses but the pub's not the pub anymore is it do you know any like the pubs should we go to the pub one day let's get this baby out do you know what was a pub that pub when we don't so oh my god that was a pub that was a you had to be a member to go that when we don't know when we were on axis tower and we did some pictures

outside it we went to the toilet because obviously ashley's pregnant so we went into this random and it felt so dirty being in there we did a knock and we walked in we're like hi can she use the toilet it was like yeah

of course she can she went out and there was these men and it was quiet and they were just drinking pints really slow and it was in the middle of the day

and it was really dark and they had crisps everywhere yeah it was weird one in Manchester it was near oh it was near Axis Tower

yeah I don't know what it was basically girl don't fucking go I don't go there I like a pub I love a Christmas pub it's making me feel

can you guys send in pub recommendations for me and Lauren are going to go on a little sash together on a pub crawl lucas you're invited to um how long after the baby and anyone that wants to join us

three weeks do you think three weeks until you can go obviously not dressed up just like cozy jumper and jeans pub yeah three leggings i reckon after two you'll be ready a week give it i'm feeling do you know what i feel really relieved at the minute because it started to be winter and i don't love winter but i'm just glad that we can all say it is now winter whereas in the summer it was like oh it's summer but it's not whereas now we're like we're all owning it we're now winter the winter style and i can go to bed early you can like me like you okay on nip tuck we want you to get your voice heard give us a whatsapp give us an email head over to our socials and follow us we're on tiktok we're on instagram i don't look at our tiktok we've got a podcast

i'm too scared and i don't ever go on our tiktok i'm scared yeah i don't go on it don't want to are they bad i don't got it either they must be it's one of those like where i've blocked it yeah you know it's there but you just don't want to know what people that hate us definitely read the comments oh my god yeah they'll buzz off them they'll wank over the comments and i keep getting trolled on the room yeah i wonder why like you sometimes it's me though like whatever it's just people that can't keep everyone happy you're not everyone's cup of tea lauren no and i'm definitely not no so it's a good job i like coffee anyway you can send shit into us that's how hello at nittookpod.com basically we don't give a fuck boy matt right so lauren's not as on social as i

because she's been away with five million children and she has a normal job so i don't have time to scrolling but luckily but luckily one of us this is why we work because i can tell you like you know you can relate realize and ashley can sit and scroll all day and bring us the stuff that i don't have time to do exactly and boy have i got time go on so there's this thing going around at the minute called boy math and it's like memes and it's just quick witty one-liners because boys were taking the piss out of girls going girl math is spending eight grand on a handbag and then and then saying oh well it was in sale i'll save 200 boring the girls have chosen violence as always are you ready yeah okay boy math is how five foot ten measures six foot

so true so true boy math is thinking the answer to did you come is yes if you have to ask the Question, it's a no. Boymath is them wanting a prenup and they make 45k. Boymath is being afraid of gold diggers when you only have three pairs of socks. It's the funniest is when people say, I'm wondering if she's attracted to my money.

Oh, ew. Boymath is calling girls weird for doing astrology when you pretend to play football on a spreadsheet. This is something. Fantasy football? what is that i'll tell you what as well anyone that plays video games any gamers weird a lot do a lot do odd boy math is hiding baldness with a cap and criticizing girls of wearing too much makeup absolutely that is so true that is so true boy math is thinking five

inches is eight that is boy math boy math is saying they have 50 50 custody and only have their kids every other weekend wow that's boy math and the last one boy math is having a 70 inch tv and no dining table 100 boy if you've got any other funny boy maths tell us we're we're here for it or tag us in the memes we love that right lauren we've got a message you're doing a of banging isn't she little bit bangy bang bang trust me i'm not right who's doing it you okay hi girls you read out my email earlier in the year about the young swingers oh the fit ones ashley hit us up once you've had the baby oh be there with my c-section scar ready to go and my hashtag postpartum body with your big pants on love you both so much and the pod thank you i've

just listened to this week's bonus episode and a lady had written in about squirting really big hot topic this can i just say i think everyone can do it and this lady knows a lot and she's done a lot of shagging by the sound i need to show you that book yes i went through life until i was about 28 believing that i couldn't do it how wrong was i i just hadn't been stimulated in the right way so this is what i love about the swinging lifestyle you discover so much about your body and your sexuality yeah i love that yeah always why not i went to my first sex club back in 2018 and my husband and i met with a group of hot couples we've been chatting to via the app it's called swing hub if anyone's interested the one that i'm on is called x x there you go she did

it for research by the way i don't know how to delete she doesn't have to get off it so now when she does the school run everyone i'm in the area things heated up quite quickly and we all went through to one of the playrooms in the club one of the guys started using his hands on me and it was amazing amazing I wasn't quite sure what he was doing sometimes James does that and I think what are you doing something's going on and it felt different but good he asked me to squat down in front of him and he got rougher and rougher see I don't enjoy that bit though and I suddenly had this really intense feeling a bit like I was about to cum then I just squirted everywhere it was the most amazing feeling although slightly embarrassing as i didn't realize i could even do

that and i immediately thought i'd piss myself it turns out my friend is just really good with his hands no harm done the beds in that sex club are rubber anyway imagine them with a blue light on from cheetahs anyway since then my husband has learned how to summon the genie and it is now his party piece all my swinger friends love him and his chat isn't that great so it's not i love this girl anyway you're right straight men really do need to learn the ropes it's easy when you know how but how is that like guys is there like a guide for squirting so i've got this book la la la la let me explain la la la let me explain patreon as you can see here it's called block delete move on and it's not really a dating guide as such i'm not going to say too much because

honestly please download it on audible and start listening in your car it's about toxic masculinity and how it impacts us every single day so is it when we say toxic masculinity that would be somebody like andrew tate yes he's like the epitome epitome yeah yeah but she calls the guys in it gary it's like why men love bitches but fucking 10 million times better right okay and she's she has like different scenarios in it and stuff like that but also she talks about um how we have just made it acceptable to have mediocre sex with men that think it's amazing and it's fucking we let them think it's amazing yeah it's true and we've all ruined it for ourselves i agreed there have been times where i have slept with somebody and because of almost the embarrassment

because i don't and they think they're fucking it and they've not even made you come i didn't want them to say we didn't have good sex so because i felt that would then impact on me so i've been like oh my god it was amazing oh my god so that they then tell their mates it was great because yeah do you know what i mean so yeah i agree so she's got this chapter about sex and she tells you about squirting and it's called we can't consent to this i love that honestly like i i'm obsessed i've finished the book i'm obsessed read it guys and also i love the cover i love like the aesthetic of it i think that looks lovely in a living room you'll love her right okay she's very we need to speak to her love it okay right very and she's got a podcast as well um okay

thrush embarrassment oh here i am again my thrush is gone is it gone yeah i've been consistent with must improve i've not been putting much in my bath i thought you're gonna say in your vagina i've not been in my vagina have you had sex during pregnancy not really you don't do you you're not a pregnant sexer no not really for me um i was listening to your podcast driving to rochdale you were talking about thrush during pregnancy when i was pregnant i got thrush all the time and the doctor prescribed a pessary i was in a rush once i got my prescription home so i took it right away i looked in the box and went pale oh my god she swallowed the pessary

instead of putting up a fanny yeah i had to ring 111 to tell them what i'd done luckily it was fine but remember ladies if it's if there's an applicator it's not for oral consumption yeah don't put a pessary in your mouth you put it up your front or back passage um yeah right what's this one can't tell what this is gonna be hi girls love you in the podcast replying to the dilemma about the girl that found out her best mate had been cheated on that was so if you've not heard it we had a dilemma where a girl had been looking through a fella's phone which she shouldn't have done what she did we do and she finds that he's been fine but his friend had been cheating various times um on her friend so she was like what do i do with this piece of information

do i tell the friend what do i do and i it's a tough one so this is what she said i think you make a fake insta account and you send her all the videos and pictures and just let her know e.g specifics of the guy i agree i've done this i'll tell you in a minute but when making the new account don't use your mobile phone number or your real email as they can find out whether someone is connected to an account by inputting their mobile number you press forgot password telling her directly causes too much hassle for your life and relationship but not telling her is going to weigh too much on your conscience so i think you should aim for a balance in between so i once i think i'll have said this before on the pod but not everyone's listening from the

beginning i was once connected i had one of his old phones and it was still connected to his instagram so through our relationship towards the end he was horrific i could watch everything on his insta so he would go on a night out and insta is where he does the me where he does the things so i insta i would go on his phone and i could see him chatting to girls while i was sat home in real time in real time it was awful and i'd have to wait for the message to come through and him to read it before i could then read it and i had it like that for ages i could read everything hey lauren and well it's a good job he was vile he was one of the most vile people i've ever been out with um everyone will know who it was probably um by what they thought at the time when they saw

the pictures so i went on one night and it was four in the morning because i didn't sleep when i went on and he'd sent a message to a madam saying hi i need some girls numbers prostitutes so i was lying in bed knowing that where he was he was sniffed up as well probably and he was trying to get prostitutes so i was like what do i do with this i know this so i made a fake account i messaged him on the fake account she got i put my detective hat on my hat on i put on my trench coat and i got my magnifying glass and i went downstairs and i had five cigarettes in a row lauren and then and i sold my dial-up the dial-up phone hello there

i put my feet up on the desk hello anyway so drinking drink whiskey and i um i sent him a message from a fake account saying does your girlfriend know that you're looking for prostitutes at 4 a.m listen what i did which i think is really clever i not only sent it to him i sent it to me do you know your boyfriend's looking for prostitutes at 4 a.m then i screenshot it to him babe i've just got this message and i knew that he was never gonna admit to it but it was just and he was like what the fuck i'm fucking done nothing i don't fucking don't know and it was just i enjoyed thinking i know and then let me tell you how i got caught out i took the did you not just leave him oh no he bullied me for a lot longer um let me tell you

what i did i've told you this before you'll remember but in case anyone hasn't it's a good one i went to firefly um and i took said phone in handbag with me because he was out that night too so i had my phone and his phone his old phone in my handbag and i wanted to see what he was up to while he was out and we got there and it had no it was an old phone so it had no um 3g it had no contract i connected to the wi-fi in firefly went out all night got in woke up in the morning shit my phone it sent me about five screenshots have you got my old fucking phone because i've just had a notification on instagram to say i signed in firefly in manchester where you were

last night you embarrassing bitch that was a stinger I couldn't lie yeah I had anyway we always get caught

me and you doing yeah I know we're doing stupid shit he was doing he was vile Lucas he was horrific wow that man finished me because he said

I wasn't good looking enough have you seen him yeah anyway you all know who that was if you want to send him shit on insta you can right okay that'll really hurt him right anyway where were we listeners and beauty trick go ash you go with the next bit i've digressed hi you lovely girls and equally lovely

lucas lucas lucas very very lucas very very true please keep me or not don't worry guys don't worry okay right so i am the kind of person who cheers up and bakes up other ladies as i want to bring my kids up to both boy and girl champion everyone including the underdog love that that is what we need to be teaching our children 100 100 no jealousy around here however as good as i am cheering and supporting others in whatever they need i can't do it with myself i'm now in my early forties and still after 20 plus years of trying to get into the best shape, I'm at this point of a roundabout rollercoaster that I'm unsure if it can now happen at my age in inverted commas. What would your advice be to a woman in her forties still trying this whole diet,

body, work, life balance for over 20 years? And he was bringing kids up at the same time. where do i start i keep joining slimming cubs doing shakes spending a fortune on pts well this is i passed it no love you all keep being you that's your superpower right right you you silly cow enough of that we don't talk about ourselves like that do we actually right first of all you've done an amazing job your kids are fucked off and you're doing an amazing job you've just said that your kids are smashing life right let's move them to you've done your job go mom bye-bye it's about you now you've done the kids you've done really well this sounds to me like you were on a roller coaster of bullshit she's saying here slimming club slimming shakes you ain't gonna do anything

doing this crap oh my god no first of all they're expensive and they don't work first of all i'm gonna give you some home truths now i might get shit for this but you might be doing the slimming clubs you might be in the shakes but whatever you're doing you're not doing it properly because you're still not getting to the place that you want to be so this isn't about you finding a new diet pill a new diet injection this is about some willpower hon and putting some ownership onto yourself not making excuses i don't have time because of the kids i don't i'm past it now no you need to crack on and do what you need to be doing so devinia taylor's book what's it called ashley something about diet yeah she how old's devinia she's in her 40s have you seen her um

hormones come into play massively massively and devinia talks about that in the book as well um i'm only saying her because i listen listen to the book and i just think i think she was fantastic it's called it's not a diet um she is fantastic follow her on instagram no excuses your 40s you're not in your 70s 80s you're in your 40s you're in your fucking prime i feel like you are falling into poor me i'm gonna be honest what do you think i think she's falling into poor me i'm in my 40s i think as well like the hormones have a massive impact on you mentally and from an energy perspective so once you've got your mental and your energy and your focus sorted everything will fall into place then because it's all good and well doing these

shakes and blah blah blah but they're gonna make you feel like ass and your hormones especially when we start entering perimenopausal stage which is going to be in your 40s you will suffer with mind fog you will suffer with low self-esteem low energy you hold water um i would go and see i'm going to be working with this brand soon actually who specialize in the hormone stuff because i'm on hacking i've had so many questions about hormones and i'm going to start doing hormone because we don't as well we kind of just think of hormones you need to take it into your own hands this is men that have done this oh girls she's on a bloody period oh she's going no it's massive it's not to be pushed yeah it's not to be shoved to the side as a bit of hormones

it because they can't like you know what it's like when you do want you want to go to the fucking gym in winter you want to stay in bed and eat chocolate and crisps and have a hot water bottle but once you've like realized like right i'm gonna feel like this for the next few days that means cut out coffee so i think hormones let me look into that a bit more because i'm going on this course thing so i'm going to find out more about them but that book is an amazing place to start yeah um personally i don't think shakes and stuff like that work the only shake that i ever use is the supernova one all right have you had that no um it's good it's for when you want to know that you've got all of your nutrients in um and it's not i put peanut butter powder protein

powder in with it as well it tastes like shit but it's very very good for you and you can tell a difference in your skin and stuff and it's when i do like not a lot of meat and stuff like that that's the only one that i would use but i've never used a shake as a meal you know what i think if i'm going to be brutally honest i think slimming shakes slimming this slimming that are for people that can't be asked can't be asked and want a quick easy fix and think well the shake and then they blame the shakes the shakes didn't work no this is how it is if your calories in versus calories out are in a negative and you are burning more calories the right kind the right kind but even let's really it's really scientifically if you're in a calorie deficit you're going to lose

weight there is no it's science there's no two ways about it so i think what you need to do is give yourself a kick up the ass we're going to give you some tough love here just because you're in your 40s never mind that start looking into the hormones start looking into the hormone hacking read Davinia Taylor's book make small changes and now it's about you there's no excuses anymore your kids you've done an amazing job with by the sound of it and you can now take a bit of time back for you yeah and stop saying I'm a woman in her 40s mate women are fit in their 40s like they know what and you will be too and you will be so less feeling sorry let's yeah get on with this yeah definitely so we're gonna have a little break um and we will be back with dilemmas but first

are you a loyal listener of nip tuck do you absolutely adore us do we help you through life do we make you laugh do you just really like us do we take your mind off shit if so please tell your nearest and dearest we are getting so many more listeners at the minute and we've got you to thank for that please keep going keep sharing keep putting it on your Instagram. Share this link on your WhatsApp. It makes us get loads more traction. Appreciate it. Carry on, guys. Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back. Right. We've got dilemmas. I've not sang it for a while dilemma of the week dilemma of the week every now and again i'll sing it for you okay go on ashley right here i've been having sex with this guy for a year now we've been friends

with benefits but i don't know if he's actually sexually attracted to my body type i see where he follows a lot of models on social media and a certain type of model this is why i'd like to ask him if he's sexually attracted to women with my body type or if he's only attracted to skinny models well who's he shagging hun who's he shagging for a year do you know what it does fuck with your head that i have a friend and she met this guy and went on a date with him it went really well and i was like don't do it don't do it don't do it don't do it she checked his following on instagram and it was all big booty bitches and she's not like she is not a big booty bitch like but not just like she was sending me like like big booty bitches and she was like

this is really like opposite she was like i can't unsee it now so so guys if this is a thing my friend um was she's actually got her children with him now and everything but his type was not her race at all and he said it himself like absolutely not my type but they've got together they've got two children together and i think you have to remember that it's more than just what your type is yeah you might you might like looking at these supermodel types of course i agree with that but who's the guy who's who's he shagging don't ever say it to him you can't she can't ever say but You follow lovely models. No, exactly, because also the whole aura is your confidence,

your worth, you are a boss bitch. Yes. Like, if you say to him, I've looked at who you're following. And I'm not as good as them. No. And what you have to remember is, he's with you, like you've just said, Ashley, for your aura.

There is something about you that is better than the skinny supermodels. Whatever he's looking at, there is something about you that is much more attractive and he's putting his dick in you so he is into you why is it that men like follow pages and pages of girls girls don't fucking do that do you know i don't follow no and even when i was single in fact to me model men are like not for me if you take a picture of yourself with your top off i'm going to be a picture of yourself full in a mirror full stop i'm going to be sick we're not if you have instagram that you use to be honest yeah unless it's family stuff it's not gonna be sick if you take a picture in the mirror

and flex your biceps for gay guys it's totally different isn't it lucas or is it do you feel the same like so we're just saying that if a guy took a picture on his grid and he's there and he's top top off it's the biggest biggest hiccup in the world of men that almost daily post pictures of themselves honest that's what we're saying active but as well as that i would never date one because they clearly love themselves they need the attention and who else are you speaking to if you if you're putting these pictures on out and they want to fuck someone i think they just would yeah and they need they are the kind of validation validation that need valid and there has been times in my life that i have absolutely needed validation you can tell by the insta because i

was posting bikini bikini titties bikini and i needed the validation at that point and i also needed some it was like i was peacocking i was looking for a man first trap first trap but if your man's doing that or if you might it's just for me it's really icky yeah i'm gonna be so i'm gonna help you soon and if you if i ever start posting pictures of myself topless i want you to slap me i know but listen at the same time if you have worked your ass off and your body and what you do is you go on holiday with your mates yeah get a picture with your mates that's fine or i would do maybe one before and after i like transformation pictures yeah and i'm okay with girls doing transformation pictures yeah i love that because you're proud of yourself and

what you've done so we're not saying we're not saying that don't show your body off but i'm sorry we're judging men over women they just shouldn't be allowed to say we are we're judging sorry sorry just one thing quickly can i get your opinion i hate it lucas can they hear you come on guys right yes put your mic on where guys post a picture at the gym and they have a finger on their shorts pulling down to show their calvins everyone wears calvins they're like they're not they're from tk maxx home we can all get them and they pull them down but they're also showing that muscle that goes that's very sexy other bit that goes down to the penis it's like the pathway to heaven yeah but like come on everyone yeah calvins are not no i agree like yeah i agree i

No, I totally agree. I just think a man that takes a picture in the gym mirror in general should be castrated. The best... The worst ones. Let's do the worst male poses. Male Instagram poses. Okay, so in the mirror, like Lucas just said,

with the thumb pulling down at the gym, showing the Calvins that are a tenner and no one's interested anymore in Calvin Klein. The... Watch. Like, what are you doing? Yeah, are you messing with your cufflinks? Is your wrist uncomfortable?

But they do it now even when there's nothing there. Yeah, yeah, they... Or the... Yeah, no, it's one finger. With the mates, and they do this to the mates. This is my worst one. Worst one ever. They sit back.

And they lose the neck. Yeah! Like, with their legs open. They're the male boss, and they go like this. And the... Or worse, if you are a man and you've had a picture, it's okay for women, that's fine. We can do what we want.

If you're a man and you've had a picture taken looking away like this, then you are a twat. Can we say twat? I look away from the camera because... No, but not like this, Lucas. Not like this. A meal.

Holding the drink up. No. You are a twat. I look away because I think one of the most uncomfortable things because i'm not very confident yeah like no that's different no i'm talking right to your missus take my picture you get your wine glass and then they go right i'm gonna look away take a picture and then the man's like this oh imagine them sat uploading it uploading the picture going to the gym and when they turn like this to different no no no no no or when they no no no

they do this one with the arm looking muscly with the arm whereas when I yeah whereas when I'm taking an arm picture

I think it's not what I'm doing I'm doing this I'm getting those angles I'm literally holding my drink the men Lauren

yes that's girls so yeah and we've got no literally there's nothing we can't that's not fair

but we are what we are it is what it is baby it is what it is okay let's go hi girls and Lucas I've been following Ashley on Instagram for absolutely ages

from before you had Saskia and Lauren from when you were pregnant with Thea. Christ, that's six years, honey. And I religiously used to read Lauren's blog.

Oh, Lauren's blog. I'm going to do it. I keep saying I'm going to do it. I might do a wedding one. I love, yeah, because I mean, I know wedding planning can be excessive for some people.

And it's a niche place. I might have a separate space for those people. For people like me that think it's really embarrassing. That think it's disgusting. Yeah, I'm going to let someone else, let those people off.

I love the part when I listen when I'm in the car or cleaning the house. Anyway, i remember ashley once went to claridge's for christmas and i'm wondering if you could share the details about your experience there as i'm eager to spend christmas at a hotel at some point moving on to my second question right let's do first question what did you think of it it was excessively expensive wasn't it yeah and i got i actually enjoyed it that much that i got a quote

for going again and it was something like 20 something thousand pounds and i was like yeah i'm good like it was not do you know what i honestly think staying in a hotel at christmas is nice but if you do you need to make sure you get a certain type of room that you can have your sofa with the tv yeah it needs to be big enough because otherwise it's just a bet like you're in a box like it's really expensive and then i kind of thought well i'd rather go to the supermarket and buy a nice 500 pound shop of really nice wine snacky stuff and i've got um a lady called charlotte who delivers like canapes and i'd rather say to her charlotte here's like 150 quid can you do some christmas morning bits like i agree stuff like that in your own home a night a nice white

company winter candle i think maybe not an actual christmas what would be lovely is to do it a few days before in the run-up or in that weird middle bit where it's all weird yeah i mean it was amazing so and i guess if you it depends on you all i think all these things depend on your income and where you want to spend your money if you've got income that you can just spend it on i i agree but if that's what you want to do a lot of my friends do you do buy at christmas and that just doesn't appeal doesn't appeal to me moving on to my second question i have a three-year-old daughter her dad and i have been split for 18 months and this year he's saying he wants to have her over the night on christmas eve oh mate we've just had all this we've just had this conversation

and do christmas morning with her i had a last christmas eve and day until five i can't cope with the thought of my daughter not being with me on christmas eve and not waking up with her on christmas i get it that makes me feel so emotional i've told him no but he says it's only fair it is really i don't know if i'm being selfish wanting to have her but i can't help feel that she should be in her own room and her own house on christmas morning not in his mum's house it's also our first christmas in our new house and i wanted to be really special now the thought of her not being here makes me just want to get drunk and sleep the day away well that's the other option if she's not there sorry which isn't a bad option what would you do if you're

in my position how do you co-parent over christmas also what are your christmas plans if you don't mind me sharing right okay this is tough what is the situation throughout the year because like if it's 50 50 then it's gonna have to be one year your year one year his year and i think the good thing about this is if he has her this year it's not going to be that much of a christmasy christmas because she's still still right yeah next year you'll get what she's doing yeah i have to say so with james um he we will we rotate it one christmas eve the mums that's yeah and it's fair because through the year he pulls his weight so fair enough i'm sorry i totally understand what you're saying i would hate it too it is what it is however with me yeah

ain't no chance you getting my kid on christmas eve no because you have a 90 i have her all the time and you ain't getting the good bits because i put the fucking hard work in through the year so she's mine and i would fight that to the death but it's hard but it's hard because at the same time let's be fair if he's a good dad he deserves half that time he does if he's a good father he should get that perk as well and i think it's something that we don't know if he financially helps does he help is he a good father does he help throughout the year therefore deserves that time um and i think you need to sit with him and if through the year he's shite and doesn't have that much i think you're quite within your rights to say you don't get i do the hard bit yeah i get

the perks yeah if he's good throughout the year i think unfortunately this is something that you were going to have to do however when she gets a bit older she might want to stay with mom and she might be able to say dad i want to stay but even then i think the dads don't care and they still take them lauren i don't know i'm not i'm in a lucky position in the sense that yeah i get a when i want well the thing is like this year sasky is going to have yeah what are you doing this year sasky's gonna have her brother and sister at home she wants to be with them and she's fully said to me like i want to wake up with my brother and sister fair enough and i think she's said that to her dad as well so maybe and to be fair he is reasonable and will listen to her so

what she wants so i think he has listened and i think that's what we're doing and then will you get well i'm very flexible like he can have a christmas with her on boxing day that's what we do um so will he get for a few hours will you have do you think you'll probably have her all day christmas day or is it not confirmed oh 100 so you'll probably have a christmas i will have just had a c-section as well okay and i think that's it's too much for them as well they get emotional yeah so with me every year i have a christmas eve i have a christmas day there is no listen that's the thing if you're doing 90 like i do most of the work he has a four nights a month so yeah i'm doing a lot yeah and then he she goes there i saw a lot of stuff

so yeah boxing day she will go there but as i say with james's children because he's more involved it is 50 50 and it's tough and you'll have to get used to it but if it means getting drunk so then you look at your alternative i've got friends who are the same single moms and they'll have a boozy christmas one year with all the other single moms and couples and then the next year they'll be with the kids and it's actually it's quite a nice so make the most of it remember it's only one day you can recreate christmas again at home i agree i think we put so much pressure on christmas it is a night and a day at the end it is special christmas eve i used to love going to the pub christmas eve with my mates getting pissed make yourself an alternative and

just remember it's one night and one day and then it's yours next year but i get it don't get in your head about it be quite matter of fact this is how it's going to be and i'm going to get through it okay i'm going to get through it the best i possibly can i think when something has been decided for you in life and that's what's going to happen that's what pisses you off then that's what you yeah you've got to now think this is what's happening and there's no point me wasting any more time crying over this because it is what it is i'll make the most of it right guys i hope you enjoyed that i feel quite christmasy after those christmasy questions do you jingle bells jingle bells your funny smells remember guys on nip tuck you can get in touch it's all about you

we want to hear off you guys send us your confessions your questions your dilemmas your beauty hacks your bargains your tips your tricks send us a mouthful we've got an instagram we've got a tiktok and if you head over to this episode's description you can see all the different ways that you can get in touch we'd absolutely love it as well if you left us a review and don't troll ashley don't troll me anymore please it really hurts my feelings um you can screenshot this as well show us where you're listening and we see it all and we love you thank you guys guys love you bye