Nip Tuck - Christening To Twisted Firestarter

Episode Date: August 26, 2026

This week, Ashley’s deep in christening prep. From outfit dilemmas and godparent duties to the vicar grilling the chosen few before the big day. Meanwhile, Producer Lucas is preparing for quite the change of scenery, going straight from holy water and hymns to seeing The Prodigy live. Christening to Twisted Firestarter… Lauren also shares possibly one of her most unhinged stories yet after a desperate attempt to retrieve her vape ends with her inside a wheelie bin and it only gets worse.Ashley's got the update you've all been asking for on her postpartum piles, there's vagina chat and a debate over the important questions: when a relationship ends, how quickly should you delete your ex from Instagram and is 385 blocked accounts excessive?Things take a more serious turn as the girls have an open conversation about postpartum depression, the pressures women can face after having a baby and the Lindsay Clancy case, as well as the importance of talking honestly about the darker side of motherhood.Trigger warning: This episode includes discussion of postpartum depression, postpartum psychosis, suicide and harm to children.If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this episode, information and support is available at: https://www.samaritans.orgHead over to our socials @niptuckpod and click the link in our bio to find our YouTube, where full video episodes will be released every Wednesday at 5pm. If you're a Patreon member, not only will you get the Wednesday main episode the day before at 5pm, you'll now be able to watch the Friday Bonus too!Get in touch with your questions, dilemmas and Slutty Sue's via our Whatsapp or email [e-mail] sure to subscribe, follow, rate and review!

So we've just found out that nip talk has been shortlisted at the British Podcast Awards for the Listeners Choice Award. And it's all because of you guys. So thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. This has never happened before. So to get this far already, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. But there's a chance we could have win it. We've got a little bit more to ask you though. If we've ever made you laugh, if we've ever cheered you up, entertained you,

helped you during a run, a breakup, helped you with some glow-up tips. please do us a favour back. Go on to Spotify and use your votes to vote for nip-tuk. We would absolutely love you guys to do that. Share this with all of your friends. And again, thank you if you've already voted. Guys, hello and welcome to Wednesday's podcast. Hello.

I got sleep last night. I did not. And who's the one with the seven-week-old? Honestly, 15 months in, we're still going strong. Okay, well, here we are. This is your chance to unwind. It is your Wednesday favourite podcast. And by the way, Lucas, you really did be dirty

on that fucking advert for please vote for us. Oh, my God. Can we right, guys, let's get into it. What have we got coming up today, Lauren? High energy for an hour. Hi energy. Okay, so we are going to talk. about the vicar grilling Ashley's godparents for DeBibbi and christening. We're going to talk about

postpartum and piles and we're also going to have a little debate on when it's acceptable to delete your ex off your socials. And that is what we have got coming up and loads of other stuff as well, because you know we go all over the show. Trigger warning, guys, on today's episode, we are discussing postpartum depression. Ashley, where can people get in touch with us now? Oh, Oh, what? We've got a website. Oh my God. We've got a website.

Because I forgot. I'm sorry, that's so millennial of us. Yeah. To have a website. We've got a website. No, like, as in like a website. Yeah, because we've got one. Nets up pod.

Are you on it, Lucas? Yeah. Does it look good? Why have you not told me this? Because I fucking forgot because someone probably shat in a box somewhere in my house. Our sister. Our sister's done us. Yes.

Grand on me. that she has she smashed it we need her we can't we can't keep up with the workload no and to be fair do you know what we actually are recruiting we are recruiting we are we are team niptuk are expanding or when people say our team is expanding our team is expanding we just need some little bits and bobs but we won't go too into that have what what's the website you put jobs on read I don't know I've never done it never had too hon um right Niptookpod.com. Is that what it is? Yeah.

I've just put my name in for the mailing list. I'm just checking to one. Go on the mailing list. Anyway, we've got that. But how else can people get in touch? Okay. If you head over to our Instagram, I'd say that's the easiest way.

Niptuk pod. There's a link tree. I'm just laughing about those text messages. We've not discussed this. We need to discuss it. We won't go in detail. Fuck me. It's like as if our work phone

has turned into Gossip Girl and we are getting told about affairs of Premier League footballers. Yeah, and I honestly, the worst person so basically for some reason with our, we're not going to say who, what, why,

because that's not appropriate, but for some reason with our WhatsApp, and now and again, the business WhatsApp comes to my phone and I get a text with whatever this has been sent. I don't know why. So I'm just sat there, right?

Minding my own fucking business on a Sunday night. business and I get this text saying, just so you know, such and such, she's having a face. I read it and I was like, I'm not asked. And I just thought of all the people that could get this text who gives a fuck less, it's me. But did they like do it off their number? Must be an anonymous number. They were trying to grasp someone up and I just was like, we're not touching that with a barge pole. Not, not. I was in bed with my hobnobbs like, no. Do we have the work phone? Someone does. Hello. Ah, hello. Did you not see the text? Did you get the message. Not yet.

So clearly we're using it really appropriately. I pretty much just use it for the WhatsApp and... Well, I'd suggest you pass it over to Alex so he can have a little look. Anyway, back to where you can get in touch. But keep those things coming. Yeah, I mean, because

yeah, like... They entertained us. Yeah, and love it. So on there, you can access the links to the Patreon. This elusive thing we keep talking about. Basically, if you're not, on it, get on it. You get early access to episodes. You get links to all kinds of outfits before we release them and bargains and recommendations on our Instagram. You can watch the bonus. You can watch

the bonus. You can DM us. It's got all sorts on there. It's a lovely gang. Also, we're on YouTube. YouTube is piping hot. You can literally watch us. You can see our facial reactions when we were just talking about that. And you might, you know, see a few side eyes on there. Yeah, you might have to work stuff out. So basically, it's all going on here. Yeah. Just get involved, right.

Okay. I've got a story to tell you about what happened to me the other week. And I wrote it down because I thought, this is too embarrassing not to share. And one of my favorite things to do with embarrassing stories is share them and make them less embarrassing. So, as we know, I'm still vaping. I haven't quit the vape.

I can't quit the vaid. I'm sorry. Like, I'm not... It's vial. It's vial. It's vial. I'm not proud of it, but I'm still doing it, right?

So, James knows a vape. It's kind of like, you know, your mum knows you smoke, but you don't be disrespectful and do it in front of them. So James knows a vape. Thea sees it here and they're like, they know, but I'm respectful.

I hide in the different rooms and stuff to make. You never respectful around me. No, because you're not my husband. You're you. So, um, James was working on the house and I went to get my top up for my vape. And I didn't have very long until he was back and I was really desperate for this vape. So they've got rid of those disposable.

Yeah, you buy a top up which is even worse. I'm embarrassed. But I went and got it. It's a full blown. Then I went on to the, I was really desperate for this vape by the way. So I pulled up on the drive and I thought, right, I'll put all the bum for the box and stuff in the wheelie bin.

So it's not in the normal bins. Oh my God. And you're at that point where you're like hiding stuff? I'm just, I just thought I'll pop it in there. So the bins had just been taken out that day So I pulled it and threw one more rubbish in And they'd just been emptied and shut it And then I thought

I've put my fucking vaping it What like the whole vape that I'd clicked on I'd thrown it in the wheelie bin Well I didn't have time So I thought right what we're gonna do So I thought right I can probably get to the bottom of the bin No mate it gets worse You hate like bin

You're not gonna believe this And had your bins clean Because we know you like having I hadn't had my bin is cleaned, right? So the vapes was at the bottom and I'm thinking, I haven't got time to go and buy a new one, I'm going to have to get it out. So I kind of look round and I thought, fuck it.

So I tip, how can I get in? My arms aren't long enough. So I had to tip it lying down, right? My drive, by the way. You had to crawl like hamster. It gets worse. My drive is on a slant. So I think, fuck it.

So you have the CCTV of this. I couldn't. So I started crawling into the bin, right? The bottom of the bin, let me tell you what is in that? The smell. So as I, reached for the vape at the very bottom on all fours, the fucking bin started rolling with me in it.

I'm not lying, I'm not lying, I go halfway down the drive because my drive's on a sign, in the bin, and it starts rolling and I'm in it, right? Then, so I'm all in this bin, managed to get it, and I just kind of climbed out and just, didn't look around, it just kind of went, put it back up. The bin juice on my hands,

I washed my hands all day and I could, you know when you can't stop sniffing it because you know it's bad. I wash my hands several times more than I've ever washed them probably in the last year,

scrubbed my nails and every time I would be like doing something I'd just go and it stunk all day. Now I didn't have the bollocks to go and ask for the ring doorbell but I literally rolled down

the drive inside of it. So it exists. So it exists. I haven't got it, but my next-door neighbour might. Right. Please. Do you know something else James has done? He's stuck.

This is so childish he is. He has, do not message him now. Me and James message each other, you know. Do you? Yeah. About you. We send it to the meme. Oh, you fucking bitches.

He knows about this story, yeah? No. Say, can you obtain? I don't want him to know that I climbed in a wheelie to get the vap I'm trying to hide from everyone so no. I've got a message him, I've got to. So it was after recording last week.

No, no, it wasn't. It wasn't. It was ages ago. No, I swear I'm alive. It wasn't. It was when you were off and I wrote it down to remember to tell you guys. How long ago? Be honest. Probably three weeks. Yeah, I think it saves for 30 days. It's not working anyway. But do you know what James has just done? What? He has stuck a pound coin

on the floor outside our house so that he can watch delivery people trying to pick it up. I'd try and pick it up. How, like, who has time for that shit? When I was younger, we used to have a fiver on like a thing and pull it around. It's still there. So when you step out of my front door, there's a pound coin, just gorilla glue to the drive. That's hilarious.

And it's really funny because people come and they go, oh yeah, and I'm like. Have you ever what we used to do to my dad when we knew like, especially like he was in a vandal. mood is stick cling film over the toilet seat oh i've seen people do that that's just thing is so now i have to clean the house it's not fun anymore it's funny when you're not the one cleaning the toilet but then after that not so funny right yeah so that's what happened now christening yeah um we've got to wear a week out we are in 10 days is it in 10 days i've ordered a dress from meshki i don't like ordering from there because when it comes if it doesn't fit it's a ball eight to send back you have to pay tax on it as well

show me the dress that you've ordered it's the black and white one the hard black and the lock if it doesn't work i'm a bit fucked you can borrow something off me thank you well no my pre-baby size your pre the previous year so tell us about the christian which is coming up very soon so i've ordered this balman dress but it's black and white and um oh we'll co-a-ord it was still very expensive even though it was half price Okay. Um, but I feel like I've seen Doreet wearing it before.

Oh, well then, great. Yeah, so it's like got like a big white collar, a bit booby, and then it turns black and then it's got gold buttons. Because don't you think some of the stuff's really short at the minute? It's either really short or really long. So I was texting Ashley the other day and I was like, right, what is the vibe on this?

Because I didn't know, like, is it a people going glam glam, glam? That's nice. That's really nice. That's £1,000. that's a lot I know I can't well do what you want so I was like

is it out there out there she's the cutest one so far I think at this age can you say that yeah at this age yeah you can they're all like

they're all cute now but at that age I think she's the cutest so I was like is it gonna be really out there and do I have to be conservative and also Lucy was messaging me saying can you wear white to a christening or is the same rule

I don't care there's no rules. No rules. But as she said that people are going quite all out, Megan's dresses very out.

Because I didn't want to be underdress, I didn't want to be overdressed, do I do floor length, do I need to do more summary. So the one I've ordered is long. It's half black, I think,

and half white. Me and you all look the same. Yeah, we'll colour colour. Right, Theresa. So we need to talk about the godparents situation. What happened with the vicar?

So who the godparent? We also need to talk about the fact that I'm not and why. No, no, no, it's my fault. That's the best. black one. I like that. I prefer the first one.

Really? Yeah, I do. Should I order the first one to try as well? I think it's more summary. Well, I said, do you want to be a godparent? You said, no, I can't be asked, and now she's really jealous.

Like, I can tell. That's not what happened. I will tell you what, I'll tell you from my point of view what happens. So when you're a godmother, right, you do have a responsibility, yeah? I'm the kind of woman that rolls down the hill in a wheelie bin looking for a vape.

And this has happened to me before where someone said like, oh, would you like to talk about them? And it's not that I don't want to be, of course I do, but can I fulfill that role? Will I forget the child's birthday every single year? Yes. Will I wouldn't be great. Whereas you've got Amy.

It's the best. She's the best. She comes around. She helps. Like, I'm not going to do that. She literally like house the kids in an emergency. Yeah. And so it wasn't that.

Megan is the same. Exactly. And they live close to you. And it wasn't that I don't want to be a god parent. What I didn't want to be is a god parent that is shit. So, and I, I, think you get to a certain age where you know your strengths and weaknesses. And a god parent, I struggle to look after my own children.

So to be a god parent. And I don't want to do. Mine are literally the people that I would ring if like, like, yeah, I'll do it to be like, oh, God parent. And then not be a good one. So I think that's quite mature from my side. I'm a bit jealous now. Because I don't get to stand at the front with everyone.

So Steph's planning it. Right. Steph says that everything's sorted. I trust her. numerous times. I trust Steph. It's only barbecue food. So who are the,

who are the godparents? We've got Callum, Megan, Megan, Frankie and Amy. Love that. And they're good, they're good, solid people. They're good godparents and they will do a good job. But yeah, I still don't have an outfit because I wanted to wait until I was a bit smaller

to try things on. But at the same time, I know that I will be able to go to the Trafford Centre and find something in a couple of hours. Right, so it's not the end of the world. And to be fair, if I do a revolve order tonight, when will it come? Depends where it's from. If it's coming from Italy, then it takes longer. So it just depends if it's UK or Italy.

Should I just get home tonight and do a revolve? I do an order. You can always send it back, can't you? Yeah. Say that I've not, I'm hoping. If that dress doesn't look right. I sent it back and they've not refunded me. Girls, just be careful on this. I had some gift vouchers.

Yeah. So I did, I had quite a few because what happens with them, sometimes they'll give me like a gift voucher, you know, to use against stuff. So I'd clocked them up and I bought a load of stuff. I always buy and return for ASOS all the time. And I bought a lot of stuff and returned it. And then I only noticed because I knew my gift amount should be higher. Yeah.

They'd not refunded it. No, I've had it twice recently. And it hadn't gone on my gift card. When I went on, like la la la la la, la, they put it on. But if that had been on my card. Did you have the tracking for it and stuff? No, they've got it. They'd got it.

They just hadn't processed it. So I never got the return. And if I hadn't noticed just because it was a gift card, I might not have noticed. Because I do a lot of back and forth. I need to add that to my to-do list. So christening, we've got the church. Then we're going to yours.

Yeah. So I did want to book somewhere, but everywhere was booked because of when it is. The thing is, I didn't want to start, like, fully inviting people and organising it until the baby was born safe. I know that sounds really weird. But she's only going to be, like,

two months old when we have this christening. but I wanted to do both of them together and I wanted to do it in summer so obviously August Frank holiday. Doesn't matter how old she is? No, I know but I couldn't start properly and writing. Okay.

Until she was here. Because I was heavily pregnant and I was stressed and I had all those health issues and so I waited until she was here. So everywhere was full by that point. So we're having it at my house but a party at my house is fun. Yeah.

Anyway, so we've got a bar with staff. Love that. We've got Lauren will be helping. Yeah. I can do, no, I can do that. You can't get a babysitter. So me and James have done absolutely

fuck all for ourselves for ages. We just don't do anything together. So I was like, brilliant. We're going to go to... I was actually even going to sleep at Ashleys. I was like, I'm going to sleep at Ashley's. We're going to really get involved for once. Instead of me, I was nipping and nip out.

I'm going to get involved. I'm going to get pissed. It's going to be really fun. And then James's mom and dad, the cheeky fuckers are actually out that night and they're actually not available and I just thought they would be and my mum can have him

but it's a lot it's a lot and because she'd have to have him from like 11am till the next day because I'm not coming home pissed and getting him an Uber though I would get an Uber both of you

well one of us can drink I think that's how we're going to do it yeah but yeah so I'm going to have to bring him which has made it but that's just like taking a turn to the whole you know like I was like

I'm still excited but it'll look after him yeah and I mean it'll be fine but it just changes it a bit the dynamic doesn't I was thinking we can have some type, like, I was going to get fucking pissed, pissed.

I was like, I'm going mad. He can't hate your eyes. You can't, he runs everywhere. So anyway, he's coming, but here's another question. What do, what do kids wear to Christmas? If it was a girl, I'd put him in a dress. What the fuck does a little boy wear? Go on H&O and there's some really nice.

She's got a little linen, like a linen number. Because what the fuck do kids? I said to Ed, he has to sort of teddy. Yeah, boys, like girls, you get a little dress. Reese's got some nice bits. Right, I'll have a look. And they do, like, dad and some matching. Is that gross or cute?

The Reese stuff is cute. No, the dad and son matching. Is that ble? Or is it cute? I think that's cute. I'll have a look. Women, yeah, men. I don't know. I might actually go and look in Reese for my dress.

I was going to get some white trousers from Reese the other day, but it's sold out. I like Reese for like your staple pieces. Yeah. So yeah, you've got barbecue. Barbecue, bouncy castle. Great, I'll put him on there. We'll lose him for ages. Bye.

Bye. See you. There's kids entertainment. Oh, it'll be fine then. Didn't get a DJ in the end. Did you not get one? No, because I feel like everyone at my house is either inside or outside. Right.

Aren't they? Yeah. So I'm just going to have two speakers. You know what Ed's like about his music. So we'll have the music there. And the more pissed he gets the more. Yeah, Lucas can be the outside DJ. Absolutely.

What are you wearing? Have you got the loot? What's it called? The block of ice with the drinking thing again. Oh, no. I've not got the ice. That was too traumatic after last time. And if I told you how expensive that ice was.

To be fair, we had the ice at Teddy's, Teddy's christening. We had a teddy bear and you poured shots through it. Was that the one? We'll find a picture of it. It's the one where me and Ed and Teddy wear that wore the fendi outfits and it went in the sun. Yes. I think I've seen that picture. I remember that one.

That's the one where we had the cake, the cake. We had the cake in the face and stuff. What is it? They call me. haulage air. Hallage air. Well, I'm a building, a builder air. Yeah.

Right. So, christening or getting sorted. We'll update. But we had to meet the vicar. That's what we were going to talk about. Reverend Karen is who we've got guys. Okay. So we're going to the church that I got married in.

Yes, I thought it would be there. Which is absolutely beautiful. I have heard that Molly Mays looked at it potentially for her wedding. Well, you got there first. So, well, mine won't look as good as. hers but I actually did look gorgeous. I just got married in the tiny bit at the front with just the nice flowers yeah I'm sorry but um everyone now is going to be having small weddings it's very on trend is it a thing now well after the Ronaldo thing as

well what Ronaldo thing they got married in their kitchen oh that's cute isn't it I tried to get married in my kitchen but couldn't my kitchen no I just didn't want anyone there I couldn't be asked no effort yeah so what happened when they grilled the godparent So Reverend Karen had to come around and just basically check that everyone was already baptized because we learned that if you're not, you get baptized on the day. Did you know that, Louvre? Yeah, so for you to be a godparent, you have to have been baptized, right? Or christened, is that the same thing?

Yes. So anyone thinking of lying about it and just warning you. Did you lie? I've got two godchildren. In the house of God. Anyway, you can't be baptized because you're gay. Hey, what about Callum? Good luck with that.

Oh shit, yeah. No, Callum was a full choir boy. He was showing bitches to them. That explains a lot. That explains a lot. I can imagine him like, here's my portfolio. Like this at the front, like, when she came in, we were like,

Garth of Wine coffee. Megan wasn't there because she was in Turkey. Right. But Megan is... Godly. Yeah. She's godly. Yeah, she is.

She's actually Catholic. Oh, is she? I don't know what all these differences are. But I am a Christian, I think. Same. But we don't talk about religion or politics too much on the podcast. Anyway, basically, if you've not been christen, what they do is they dunk your head in just before they do the baby.

But that's annoying because it's about the baby and then you're there getting dumped. And what if you've had a full MUA in your head when you're getting dunked? Exactly. No, I would go and get dunked today like a week before. you'd have to you'd have to you couldn't Reverend Karen was actually saying I'd keep laughing at that

like Reverend Karen was actually saying that they now are like baptising a lot of adults People are finding faith Sunday So basically Snowy and Sweetie

Both together They're heads Dunked Not dunked Lauren Like splashed I didn't know they still do that Because weirdly at the last one I went to And it is holy water.

Yeah, but the last one I went to, it was almost like a lipstick. It was like a little gold stick and it was wax. And they just did. Yeah, there is wax and oil or something in that bit. And then they do the water. Because I remember Saskia and I was like, why is she all like oily? Sticky. Oh, mine haven't been christened. Would you do them together maybe?

I'm not doing them. Only because I'm not particularly religious. My mum is, but I'm not really. So I just think why. Did I tell you what I did with my one? What? I must have told you this. So it was like the wax and they asked, would anyone like to do it?

And my mate, who's the dad, was looking at me like, don't do it, don't do it. And I got the wax and I don't know if you remember the scene from the Lion King at the start. Oh, yeah. And I just put my thumb across the forward and shouted, Simba! I bet that went down well. My mate was, my parents were in the audience and they were furious. Ruining the whole thing. Yeah, but the baby will have fun.

I mean, I hope they don't scream the whole time that'll be true. Well, I think I would love, well, I will be because I'll be there, but I think a lot of people would love to be a fly on the wall in that church because it's going to be a lot of things going on. And a lot of outfits and a lot of potentially inappropriate for church outfits, I think. Because I did cross my mind. Sam Kenney sent me a picture of her outfit and I said, Sam, if you're wearing that, you're going to have to meet us after church.

Really? Was it quite? Because it was Scouse, pruny, corset and knickers. No. No, no. And there's a level. she will burn yeah

I mean there's a lot of people that will I'm looking forward to it anyway so that will be very very good so yeah and then I'm obviously going to come yeah I need to think about the outfit

because obviously I'm going to look like a fool I just wear a shirt and trousers I won't be able to stay if there's an evening thing because I am at the prodigy what I've got tickets to the prodigy as in twisted fire starter yes wouldn't have had you done for that

from christening to Did I? Same thing, really. Right, okay. So, anyway. You've booked a holiday. I've booked a holiday. I have ummed and ard about this fucking holiday.

And I have booked it. I've done it. I'm done it. Umdenard because really, is there anything restful? I mean, your last one wasn't. So yeah, going on holiday with loads of kids isn't the most, you know, whatever. But we're taking James' mom and dad and my mom.

So we have got help. And I just think Theo was desperate to go on a family holiday with James' mum and dad. and everyone loves it so we're going to do it wasn't as expensive as I thought because we're going in October and yeah yeah we've booked a holiday let's see uh we're going to the titanic deluxe golf black it's listen listen it's not the cullinan it's not the regs it's the one it's not regnum the crown it's the one that is like Disneyland no that's land of legends I'm sorry I'm not that bad as in like it's too kiddie for me that I'd die oh

so so it's not the regina i'll tell you why do you know how much the cullin and the regum the crown were for all of us you wouldn't fit in there like i'm not being 20 it was 25 000 i think it was that's just absolutely stupid i'd rather have a mummy makeover and i'm not paying that so i didn't i thought we'd have to go like really low low the cullinin since i went has gone so much more it's really expensive i'd go if there was a few of us but like that many people it's just too expensive. So we've met in the middle. We're not going as low low start. Do you not get a collab?

I couldn't be ass sorting it out. Alex. Turkey holiday for me, please. But no, so we're going there. We booked it. I think it's nice. I don't think it's not top-top end, because I can't do that with all those kids. When they're older, I'll go there. It's not bottom, bottom

end. It's middle ground. Seems fine. It'll be nice. The kids will have a good time. Right. More serious note. I can't pronounce a surname. Hayden Panette. Yeah, so I actually spoke about this on the podcast a few months ago. I listened to her Jay Shetty podcast and I was absolutely blown away by it. Lucas, just check if they've still kept it on.

It was very long from what I kind of remember and I do tend to ad lib. Exaggerate. I think it was about an hour and 20 minutes. Yeah, I reckon it probably could. Yeah. And she spoke about how her, like, start of her mental health, you know, deterioration was when Neutrogena dropped her. So she was the face of Neutriena. Back when Neutriena was like, every, like, every girl had Neutrigena or proactive or, like, simple, all of that. And they used to have this clear skin foundation. I remember her off the advert for that.

She was on bringing it on as well, wasn't she? Just beautiful. Same age as us. The episode's like, it's on YouTube, for example. How long is it? It's two hours, four minutes and ten hours. Okay, I wasn't. Two hour episodes.

So she had a lot to one. And I listened to the whole thing and I have, I've got actual goosebumps talking about it now, but she was, oh my gosh. It was, she got, Catherine Ryan spoke about it on her podcast. And that is how I find a lot of stuff via when Catherine. Catherine's talking about something. And Catherine was saying, you know, she's getting a lot of shit because she spoke about giving up her child.

Her child. And a child moved to Ukraine with the dad. With the dad. And she just said, like, you know, sometimes you have to say, like, I love my child that much to know that they're not safe with me right now. Yeah.

Oh my God. Imagine having to think that. Like, wow. So where it all started was basically, she made some comments about postpartial. and it was so natural the conversation. And from the bits I've read, there wasn't anything shocking.

It was very fair. It wasn't any, it was all very real stuff that happens. But you know what, though? We cut something out of the podcast a few weeks ago. We did. That's just coming to my head. Yeah, we did. And it's something that she actually said

when I said, I've thought about throwing the baby out of the window. No, you didn't say you thought about it, actually doing it. What you said is, sometimes it can be so stressful with an newborn, you feel like you want to. throw them out the window. You didn't say I have considered actually doing it. But we were basically, we were talking about how you can be in the absolute pits of where you think I'm going to chuck this thing. And we cut it. And the reason we cut it is because probably Lucas, you're not

cutting it this time, is probably because we thought, shit, how's that going to get, how's that going to get taken? And actually probably how it would be taken is loads of mum's saying same, same, same. All my mum friends would understand, but we were a bit worried about it and she was very brave and to really honestly say, I was at a place where I couldn't give my child a great life at that moment in time. So I let her dad take away. She'd be happier and she spoke about her issues with postpartum addiction, how it made a feel, the depression. But like I say, nothing was particularly shocking. The giving the child, that was quite, the child moving to Ukraine, that was quite shocking to me. No, but the Neutra Jena thing was just that she said she struggled postpartum.

part of life. She hadn't hit the point of addiction yet. Right. It was just that. It was basically, she made these comments where she was like, you know, you have thoughts of you want to kill yourself, you might want to kill that kind of thing. And they dropped her. And they, yeah, and then that's when she got dropped from that and she was like, well, what, like, what do I do? Because this is what we were talking about. It's really hard being like a big, big celebrity because people want honesty from you and they expect you to be honest. And actually it helps loads of people when you are honest. But those people that you help aren't the ones

necessarily paying your bills so you'll help all these people which is great and what we want to see but then you've got the brands that are like you're not on brand for us anymore so you do yourself a disservice

or you get trolled because you buy a percentage because you've been honest but then there's all these women there's all these women that'd be really helping other women She's clearly having a mental breakdown when she shaved her head

and everyone like took the piss it was just like mental so what we were talking about with her is again that same thing of when you're famous and even not when you're famous even when you're kind of like us just like a you know Zed list or whatever podcasters

you're damned if you do and you damned if you don't because if we like we took about surgery yeah like we took that bit of the episode out that would have probably made some mums that were in the throws of postpart and really struggling that probably would have made them feel loads better however you have to protect yourself as well of what negativity can be taken from it

and it was really weird because Megan did a video the night before yeah and it was about because Megan she won't mind me saying this like she really struggles postpartum and not in that way more like herself yeah yeah um

which I'd say I'm more like that like yeah you do you have like I'm I know when like to I think you know yourself and do you know what like every mum is totally different I personally would go mental

being at home with the baby yeah I couldn't do that And you've learned that. Yes, I would like that. You know, to a degree it is hard. I like to get out a bit. But I'm more upset. Don't let this thing go.

I get more obsessive the other way, which actually isn't healthy either. I'm so, like, looking back from when I had Saskia and I was literally just me and her in the house, no help, like on my own. The mental health. To now me, like, getting out and about and then I get like the couple of hours of the quality time and.

You're better. Way better. Yeah. And you've got to know what, what your, fingers and now you're on number four you've probably learned this is how I can be the most sane version of me for the four children and this is what works for me and it's the same way that it might not work it's the sleep yeah it's to sleep yeah yeah and everyone's different I'm probably more

and again it's still not particularly healthy to the degree of a bit of a yeah I had well yeah I don't want them I'm like obsessively um feel guilty and an obsessive that I can't leave them so either way not that healthy. If you can find a middle ground, that's the best way. Yeah, because my postpartum might happen in five years time.

You just don't, and this is the worrying thing. Yeah, because you've shoved it. So this is the thing, I think the main thing that the point here is people talking about it more.

It is so normal. Not judging. Not judging, talking. If you feel like shit postpartum, it's really normal. Patreon's really good for that because there's a mum chat on there. Oh, it's great.

And I go through that and quite often. Very proud of that. Yeah, quite often people will post because they know it's a safe space, they'll be like, I don't think I like my baby or whatever it might be like, listen, just I hate my husband or whatever.

And it's really normal. So have those conversations, but it is really sad. The Lindsay Clancy thing as well going on at the set. I feel like people are talking about it. Wait, what do you think, guys, this is totally our...

We're just talking about it. We don't know anything. So Lindsay Clancy, guys, you probably all have watched the case on Patreon. They're all talking about it. But basically, Lindsay Clancy... There's a few podcasts. Yeah, there's some podcasts about it as well.

She suffered with postpartum, I think almost to the point of psychosis where literally her head had gone. She was hearing voices, this, that the other. And a lot of... She was a midwife, how crazy. And a lot of the problem was that she was let down by medical, and this is part of the argument.

She was let down by the medical team. She went again and again and again and again, and was like, I'm not okay. But she actually said, I've considered harming my children, I've considered harming me. And they just kept giving her more medication. She'd go back, they'd give her another one,

another one. She was on 13 apparently at one point. 13 medications. Yeah, and they just kept giving her. She was like, that's not working. I've gone nuts now and they were giving her more. So she wasn't looked after properly, first of all. And she's not someone that was hiding it.

She was crying out. She was saying, I'm not, okay, I've lost the fucking plot. And they weren't listening and they weren't looking after her. So that was part of it. The second part of it, her husband. It's already remarried and had a baby. There's a lot of opinion about the husband. So the husband, I mean, who are we to judge?

But he's remarried. He was with a new partner, moved in with them four months, after the, that happened. So what she did, her husband came home, he sent, she sent him out to do some errands. When he came home,

he found her outside, on the floor, having jumped from a window, kind of, you know, not okay. And he said to him, where are the kids?

This is what he says. Then he, she said they're in the basement. Yeah. Now, the emergency services says she couldn't speak. So there's a bit of her.

She went to the, he went to the basement and she had killed all three children with a, what they called, neck thing. exercise bans. There was a baby

and then I think the one was six, one was four. So the point of this matter is there's now a huge case because she's pleading insanity because she's saying that wasn't, she's now paralyzed, she survived,

but she's paralyzed. I don't know yet. We've not listened to the whole thing, but there are conspiracy theories that he had something to do with it. One of the things I saw was there were some searches made from her laptop.

And it was things like, which, because she'd also cut, cut some of parts of a body like a wrist and stuff. Which vein would kill me if I cut it. She was a midwife. Yeah. She knew which vein.

She's medically fucking trained. She don't need to Google which fucking vein in your wrist is going to kill you. So that was part of it. Then they found out that when these Google searches were done, she was at the doctors with one of her kids. She didn't do those Google searches. And that's fully legit, Lauren. It was on TikTok.

As in, no, no, no, no. The piece of the court case, the footage. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. So there's a lot of conspiracy theories whether he had more involvement, whether he helped her, whether he pushed it. Who fucking knows? But I think the main thing here is no woman in their right mind wants to kill their children, right?

So if they're doing that, she's got a life sentence forever now anyway. She'll live with that forever. So it's whether they accept that she wasn't in a right mind. And it's very sad and very interesting. So if you're not following it, go on the podcast. I think it's something that, you know, we need to. perhaps look at more and like be able to I Catherine Ryan said the best place to ring is the Samaritans oh okay what she had a look into like four different places that could support you

postpartum right there should be more the opening hours were not good of some of the others it's in the night that your head goes yeah and she said the best place to ring is the Samaritan so if you're feeling there you need to ring the Samaritans they're open 24 hours because another conversation we were having is about like a lot of the girlies that listen are in the beauty industry they're self-employed like that pressure that you've got where you might want to just like be a recluse and stay at home for a year with your baby and breastfeed and whatever you want to do nest that is totally that's very normal but then you've got to go back to work after two months because you do aesthetics or nails and you self-employed in whatever way or

content creator, like whatever, and then you're battling this whole thing in your head. Like being a woman now is not what, naturally, we were meant to be in. That's why your hormones. This is the issue. When I lost the plot in like January, February, and I did, I fucking lost the plot.

And it was because I felt like my role was so confusing. Yeah. Because all my body and my like urges were to look, after my baby. That's all I wanted to do. Nothing else. That was my overwhelming urge to take care of this baby, right? But at the same time, I've got a job that doesn't allow for me to do that for very long. So I had to also be thinking about doing videos on Instagram, doing this, doing that, pod, whatever. So I felt so torn because there was still a financial pressure on me, which back in the day, when you were the mum, you didn't have the financial pressure, really. The man had more of the financial

pressure so you could be mum. Lots of things have changed for good, in good ways around that. But I felt like I wanted to be a mum, but I was also a provider financially for the family as well. It's not just James. It would be both provide. And me to not provide would have caused a fucking big problem as well. So I felt like I was so pulled in different directions and I couldn't be what I do,

I wasn't being good at any of it. And I think that's really, really common unless you're on that leaf. But even then, you're not getting paid a lot. So there's still the financial pressure. that enters a whole other like chat of I know a lot of like fast fashion and like companies like that like should really try and take more responsibility when looking after female staff members especially if they've got an extra high turnover and they are female focused businesses but that's another debate we're getting too too much today so let's have a break and lighten it up should you have a break? My arse. And then let's talk about your ass. Yeah.

We're going to have a break, guys, and then we're going to talk about Ashley's ass and a lot of your vaginas as well, actually as it happens. We will be back in a minute. Here is the update that everyone has been asking for. How is my bum? It's actually, guys, like it's fine. Everyone thought that they were getting the update on your Insta stuff,

and actually, you just given an update about your... I was like, yeah, yeah, we've been waiting, we've waited. My bum. My backside. It's honestly, like, it's great. Has everything gone back up? Everything's gone back up. Like, we've recovered.

Do you have any skin tags, anything? You'll have to look at my only fans for that. So the piles have gone back up the book? Yeah, they've gone. Like, so anyone out there now who is nine months pregnant with grapes hanging out your ass, like... It could go back. But I need a collab.

you do we have really you actually have pioneered you have pioneered I'm a pioneer pioneer is that the episode piles and I think what you have done for the UK is you know so I would say almost like a what's that award that people get pride of Britain what's it called like a Prince Charles of course not a Pride of Britain award could we put a forward for that I'm sorry, but did you know that half of adults suffer with nails? And she's made people feel better. So I think either Pride of Britain or a knighthood. Yeah, I think so.

Because it was really brave of me. And like I said, there was times when I was struggling. The Piles of Britain Award. The Piles of Britain. Yeah. So what I just want to say is, like, you know, we've just spoken about like being open about postpartum and da-da-da-da-da. We're here waving the flag for the girlies. It's not just girls that get piles.

though. Is that what you and James talk about really? Yes or me. Often. Our post that we did the clip about Piles, tips for Piles, okay, do you know how many likes it?

It got like 600 likes. Do you know how many people shared it? In the thousands. Yeah, because people don't want to admit it. They don't want to like it. They don't admit it. They'll share it to them mate, but they won't admit it.

Do you know what else has gone absolutely wild? What? when we spoke about fanny biotics. Yes. So we see this is the thing we're here to talk about this shit that everyone's embarrassed about

so I have got a friend Yeah, I've got a friend who kept getting recurrent BV she did everything Couldn't work it out I gave her some of my Better bits Yes, the intimate probiotic

Yeah She hasn't had it since Now I'm not making claims that it's going to get rid of it forever But she said something has changed I feel like summer as well Like you're in and out of the pool bikini, bikini weather is thrush, yeah, it's shavings, like swimming pool water, you're using

hotel shower gels. Also being sat in the, on the plane for a long time, squished like that with your labia squished together. Oh my God. I feel, no, honestly, I feel like, in jeans, I've done it. and then you saw, and I just think summer is such a fanny issue time, isn't it? Maybe we shagging more. Yeah, you shag more on holiday. I think so. Not kids holidays. No, no, no. Like, I, on other holidays. I think so. So basically you take two capsules a day. That is it and it just balances thing. You have to think about it. Take it with all your other bits of shit that you're taking a morning. Easy to travel with. Travel with that and you just literally pop them in and it just takes in your god, not your funny. Not your funny. I mean I don't know maybe you could. That's magic.

But it just gives you that piece of mind that you're not just because we take all these supplements and we don't take anything for our vaginas and vaginas need looking after the pH balance. Your other mouth. I'm... Anyway. Your fanny's just as important. It is. It really...

How you know. How annoying when you have BV and Thrush? How much does it take over your day? Do you know what? I totally agree. Or like a smelly fanny. We should get in touch with better bits because they've done such a good job

on the pus probiotics to see if they can make something from my asshole. Good idea. We could even be on the face of the... bottles. Yeah. Piles pills. But yeah, we've got a code nipped up. They do some other good shit on there as well. Yeah, they do. The metabolic ones go, but I do think if your fanny's off, or even if it's not, it's worth looking after it. Yeah, pat the pus. You need to look after your pussy. I am done with talking about nether regions and genitals. I'm over the genital chat. What I do want to

talk about, though, is the Ronaldo thing that you sent in the other day because we had a little debaty, debaty on this. So basically, and I don't know, because guys, guys, there's a lot of AI shite flying around. That's a point. You can't trust anything anymore. You can't trust that anymore. But we'll just assume it's true. It's true.

So someone had gone on his social media. I can't remember if it was Insta or Twitter. And they'd got pictures of him and his ex-girlfriend and resurfaced them like the day after he'd got married that was still left on there. So they were like, they weren't archived. They were still on there. Yeah, they were on the grid.

I think it was Insta. I really need to go back through my grid. Okay, so I'm going to say this. If my ex was a arena shake, I'd keep the pictures on there too. That's a fucking status symbol. Married or not married, like I was with her. That's like, I'm sorry.

So we were talking then about... But then imagine being his new wife and them still being on the grid. That's her problem. But if I was Ronaldo... Yeah. I'd probably want to just let people know that I didn't do that. I don't post men

because in my honest opinion, you should not post men on social media. like you shouldn't post kids. Protect your man. Yeah, I get that. Because as well, what girls need to realize is if you're on social media and you're like, look at how my baby treats me. Look at what he buys me.

Like, look at him. Like, we're giving him a little face up. Like, no, we're not posting him. No one needs to know. Let's keep him as like the B story line. Yeah, he's not the main. Yeah. No, I do get that.

I might. I put James on all the fucking time, don't I? But that's just the difference because I find, I don't know, I like sharing him. I think he's funny, I think he's really fit. And I'm like, look, I mean, please, nobody takes. Ed's not really got the personality. Please nobody take him off me.

But I just think he's so fit. And also, he's such a big part of what I do that I enjoy having him on there. And I might eat my words, but I like having him on there. But my page is very different to yours as well. Like, mine, yours is a lot more, well, it's about you, your business. It's very, like, focus.

yours is more narcissistic No but it's about It's your brand isn't it And you're a founder It's your brand mine's more The family page Do what the fuck you want But I'm just speaking

In your own experience We're married as well girls So don't forget that We're in a different year Like I personally Until you are engaged Down the line I wouldn't be posting you man

And then when people split up When is it okay? to delete the pictures. I, I, oh, you'll do it the second the phone goes down. Like, I, if I fell out with Ed,

you know straight away, I'd be Ashley Hunt again. Like, like, from, like, from, like. It's just giving bothered then. Whereas if I'd split up with someone, I don't want them to think my first thought was,

I don't give a shit because they're gone now, bye. Yeah, I get that. How would you feel if you were dating someone and you scroll down? Because also, don't forget, this is a man,

Men are not like us and they shouldn't be either. If I had a fella, right, or a man whose priority when we split up was to go on Insta and unfollow me and delete my pictures, that's giving such pussy energy in my opinion. It really is like, why are you doing that? Go and have a wang, go to the gym, go and shag another woman. Don't go on Instagram about, I'm unfollowing you, your mum, your sister. And then I'm deleting up.

No, but I'm like that. But you're a woman. Yeah, well, I'd want to like, I'd, So I'd say get me off your page. But we're talking about men. Should that be a priority to scroll back? No, you're right. I just don't think it was.

And then I'd get the ick if you did. So I think for men... Has James got pictures of his axes on his? No. Well, there you go then. But I doubt he did it the next day. Do you know what I mean? Because he's not...

He's probably, about six months later, he probably started shagging me and thought, oh! In fact, I think he did. And then he probably went on and, oh, bugger, go remove remove that's probably what James did and that to me is a norm like that's a normal if he sat there that and deleted yeah i just get the ick but if you're married maybe i don't know

i just think like let's not like give men their time so just don't post them at all no well i'm fucked now i've posted every single one of mine haven't i'm they become the character at the time well we all name my head counts under one hand Oh yeah. Right. Guys, tell us your thoughts on when you should delete them. And yeah, as a woman,

if I put up with someone, I wouldn't go and delete them straight. I wouldn't want them to think I was that arsed about it. And I wouldn't unfold them. And do you know the other thing as well? Sam Kenny posted it the other day and I'm a big believer in this.

You block everyone, right? Yeah, I block. My stance is the total opposite. My stance is, no, no, no, you can watch. You can watch. I've got exes on mine. They can watch. Yeah, no, mine will still watch

off another account, though. That is a fair point. Mine are that jobs. Like I wouldn't, I wouldn't, I've got exes on there and I'm like, no you, you can watch me. I went on my phone the other day because I was trying to do something and are you ready to hear how many people I've got blocked? Go on. 385 people. What?

But why if they're going to go on a burner anyway? I don't give a, because I want them to have to struggle. To get to you. And then realize what a weirdo there they are that they're having to go on the business. it's a search for and then at some point they'll realise it's and I so believe in evil eye that and also like we've been out before and people come over to me and they're like please

unblock me and you don't even remember why you block them probably no elephants never forget and I literally I'm like no I'm not unblocking you like I did what I did I'm wondering what mine is I bet mine is go on settings and blocked

okay let's have a look at mine you'd have to really really really, really. I reckon yours is about 28. Right, let's have a look. Oh, I don't know where it is. You'd have to really, really, really piss me off. Blocked.

This is embarrassing. How? Go on. 200. I'm so embarrassed. But what I will say, when you look at them, they're all fake pounds. They're all burners. So you know what?

I think we used to block people who we knew were trolls. I think it's trolls. Not one of them is a normal name. they're all either fake accounts or that not one is anything. It's not. Like, yeah, anyway, guys, thank you for listening. This has been all over the place. And like we said, if you do, in all seriousness,

if you do need help, then there are different charities that can help. We're going to tag them on the episode description. If you're struggling postpartum, talk about it. Right, guys, if you can't get enough of us, let me tell you what's going on on the bonus. So we are talking about something. It's quite a genital heavy one again. We're talking about labia pads that you can buy to hydalabia.

And we're also talking about something we found, which is five ways to get your butthole ready for fun. So go over there if you want to listen to that. We'll also have dilemmas. If we've got time. If we've got time, we'll do some dilemmas as well. Right. Thank you so much, guys. Thank you.

I'm looking at a block list. Bye, guys.