Nip Tuck - F*** me, I'm 30

Episode Date: April 19, 2022

Money, relationships, careers, babies and treatments..... The 'big 3 0' can cause a bit of a wobble.BUT there's no need to worry if you're getting in a twist because it can be the perfect turning point to make the changes you need!Ashley and Lauren share their advice on saving, houses, climbing the career ladder, dealing with freezing your eggs or responding to 'are you having babies' probes.Plus a special guest appearance from Ashley's husband....Remember it's @ntngaf on instagram and use NTNGAF20 for 20% off at weareskinfluential.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hi guys i'm ashley and i'm lauren welcome to this week's episode of nip tuck and not giving hey fuck ashley's eating a donut yeah i'm just one big round fuck she's sat eating a donut in her right hand whilst talking by the time this goes out i'll be the size of a whale you're gonna be so fat whatever you're pregnant enjoy it's fine so lauren what are we talking about today okay this week okay okay this week um so first of all fuck off eat your donut you fat cow so first of all i'm gonna tell you what's really i mean i've eaten mine what's really getting on my enhanced tits okay right there's a certain page i don't want to slate anyone in particular they're not the only page doing it but i'm losing my shit now over this and i'm so close to like

why have the police not stopped me like something but i had this rage but it was about three months ago and you've only just caught on no i'm i've still seen it but like recently it's really bothered me okay so it's um practitioners that do fillers non-surgical botox face apping their pictures how in god's name can you think this is okay okay so the reason let's talk about face app we love it right let me tell you what face up is so i use it but not like i use it very sparingly okay so let's let me tell you what face up is if you don't know if you've been hiding under a rock if you're hiding under ugly and if your pictures are ugly this is why basically every bitch does it so if you're not doing it then then like i just thought i was bad at makeup and then i realized

everyone was using face up okay so you have face tune face tune is where you can like edit bodies a little um smooth faces a little just like if if you've taken a really amazing picture but something on it is pissing you the fuck off now this is what magazines think perfect yeah then you can still use that yeah and if um the thing that's pissing you off is your face then you use if you want a new head so then you've got face app and it basically i can't i don't even know what it does but it makes you look insane it's definitely what the kardashians have been yes absolutely so you i only use that actually that's my last resort if i've got a gorgeous picture the background's gorgeous everything's amazing but my lighting's shut on my face or like i'm just

ugly or it's lighting it basically highlights your face as if someone stood there with a bright light there are people that use it to get a new head yeah so there's different filters on it and one of them is like a magazine front cover with a full smoky eye and it's shocking glamour shot yeah i've never used that one of them just sorts you out movie oh one of them just sorts you out of it so men can do it too yeah and they look so fucking stupid um oh my god once listen to this a girl posted a picture and she's hugging a friend a guy and it's half face up half his face and hers it's really funny anyway that's what it is blackout that's what it is so get it if you've not got it i'm not saying it's gross you should but whatever everyone's on it everyone has it

everyone has it like these perfect pictures are not natural using it on this page no so this page is she's have you heard her right she's got a mouthful of donuts she's like smacking her hands around she's such an angry fat pregnant thing so she's actually not fat at all you know she's got a bump and that's it but i just i just oh my god her back is fat the camel the camel humps are weird um but yeah so this page and i've seen a few that do it are doing people's fillers and these disgusting thread lifts thread lifts and then the after his face apps and it's like a 50 year old woman that now looks 30 it's disgusting how you are doing this and selling this and now also if you're buying this you're fucking stupid as well if you're watching this

i'm gonna go there because i'm gonna look like that then you're stupid it's the pages that are like we're so about patient safety no and then you've just put a face up picture you're selling the dream legit if if you are having injectables your skin's actually gonna look worse after the appointment you're not gonna come out and also you're not gonna come out with a set of strip lashes on after having a mill in your lip doesn't happen your eye the white skin texture isn't gonna be flawless exactly like stop if you if you're buying that and think you're gonna look like that you're stupid also the people doing it stupid can we start calling it out can we message them and be like i have messaged them have you what a bitch i messaged two and they ignored me

so do your research and don't just don't fall into this fucking trap of thinking that if you have this stuff done you are going to look a million dollars immediately it doesn't work like that and it is absolutely unfair i would like to think most people look at it guys can we just admit we all fucking use it what face up yeah oh do you remember listen to this so um was it the one that i sent to you and you did it for me or did i send it to one of my other friends so i got a right so i got really good picture everything was really good except my face it just was off the lighting was shitting it was just ruining it so i had sunglasses on and you couldn't see my face anyway but you just needed some brighter light so i sent it to my

friend because i didn't have face up so i sent it to her and she did it and when she did it she forgot and i didn't look at it close enough because i didn't care i uploaded it and you could see an eye in my sunglasses and someone commented like you've got an eye in your um i know and do you know what they put why don't you be honest about things and use don't use face like ashley doesn't and i was like shut the fuck up now lauren i'm gonna do a rant about this as well when we're in a setting with certain basic bitches then they always like when you're like oh do you know blah blah and me and you guaranteed are like she's fucking stunning yeah how does she look like that tell me what you've had i'm having it guaranteed they will go check and it's

all her pictures yes she's had so much work done oh if you're saying that stop yeah like stop now you sound so jealous like yeah we all edit our pictures i mean if you don't fucking good on you and also like if you've not had work done then great but most people that look amazing unfortunately half yeah so can we stop saying she's a catfish she edits her pictures whatever what i'm looking at she looks great she looks good to me yeah is it bothering you no it's like when you say she's gorgeous but she's had loads of work done and she still looks gorgeous what did that change tip for you girls guys fucking hate it when you slag other girls off or look jealous yeah they hate it i'm the first to say oh my god she's beautiful or like even the rexes yeah you're like oh my god

look at that girl over there like they fucking love that whereas if you're like who does she think she is in that poly dress like whatever no fucking it doesn't make you any fitter yeah so stop i think the thing is as well there's enough pressure on us as women without judging each other so one of the things i wanted to talk about and that i've noticed a lot is the 30 bracket i feel like the pressure on women and i can't tell you if it happens in your 40s because i've not hit it however i can tell you that in your 30s there is so much pressure why is that why are your 30s like did anyone else go under pants when you're a real grown-up i freaked the fuck out my birthday was in lockdown i was i can't explain something about me wasn't happy

i'm 32 now yeah i'm nearly 32 why why are we why is the 30s i don't know but you know what i'm i'm like really open about my age now i know we've got friends who lie about their age yeah i've never done that but i've never been old enough to need to lie maybe i'm gonna even by like a few years like well well on holiday i think i'd rather be 29 now like when we were like what like two years ago whatever and we went away i think we did say we were like 28 but why i don't know let's talk about why i don't know the answer but i do think that there's loads of pressure after 30s been my best years though everyone says that and i'll be honest my beginning of my 30s because of my situation wasn't however now i'm done with that i agree you feel i'm so much more comfortable

yes no so we're sat here talking about my hairy pubes you shitting yourself all these things i would never i would never be so confident no way we would have been like yeah and now like i don't give a fuck like if you don't like me then don't fine yeah and if men don't like me then fine because i know i'm a catch so whatever exactly yeah yeah a vibrator anyway exactly so the thing there is some changes when you hit your 30s like let's not lie okay there is well a lot of people not everyone but people in their life where they might have had children therefore the bodies have changed quite a bit not everyone has you yours is changing right in front of my eyes but also as you eat the donut but also there are a few things so let's talk about the changes when you

hit your 30s we're gonna make you feel better girls we're not gonna make you feel worse like You might be a bit wobblier and heavier. But you're confident? Yeah. No, that's not going to help anyone. We're going to make you feel better about this, okay? Because it isn't that big a deal. I'm going to tell you some stats that are going to make you feel better.

But also, like, keep looking hot. Just keep looking. Don't be like, I'm getting older now, I'm giving up. No, now is when you step up. You'll be fighting me in the grave. No wrinkles! This is when you step up. Because you've been riding on a wave of youth.

Now you've got to put the fucking effort in. you don't want to like think like i'm going to look 25 forever but you know what looks good on older people in general someone that looks after themselves yeah it makes the most out of themselves so there is something to be said for when you hit your 30s there are some changes okay so your skin you heard our last episode about skin um hopefully you learned a lot there but your cell turnover at our age when you hit your 30s is every 28 to 35 days okay as a child it was 14 it's doubled in shitness so you need as we mentioned in your last episode to keep exfoliating to help your skin to turn over you need to have regular peels and use the products containing

aha which we discussed last time as we also said last time bad habits from your youth are going to come out now so if all of a sudden you're like i turned 30 and everything changed it might have done and when you hit your 30s anything that you've late night late nights smoking crack anything going in the sun um smoking drinking all that in your 30s it is now going to show age gang bangs your vagina is now going to be loose it's all going to come out now my fanny thing what that i've had done that you're getting done yeah let's talk about that so if you've got a fanny a new one

a new one no so yeah there is a fanny thing that I've not done but Ash has what's it called fem 360

ultra fem 360 go on tell and it's internal and external vaginal tightening I've seen Ash's before and afters yeah

it wasn't bad before no no no no it's just less of a beef curtain though less of a ham sandwich less of a wizard's sleeve but we move but you're

well the baby's coming out of the stomach so you should stay okay but i don't think it matters where the baby comes out when you're pregnant it opens yeah well i've not got a prolapse but basically when you're pregnant basically even if you've not like just go and get a fanny tie why not basically basically why wouldn't you want a tighter fanny for eight minutes she puts this probe in and out of my vagina shall i do it and you can film it it'll be so katie that does it is so gorgeous as well have you ever seen it i've spoken to her because i was gonna have it done and then something happened can't remember stunning let's do it and then let's film it for everyone i go you go in

and you open your legs and then she sticks this rod in your legs in your legs in your bed well she does the outside first so she goes round your lips does it feel good no it just feels hot okay and then she goes in and out she's doing the actions here by the way and then um you have three sessions and from feedback it's worked did you get so was the feedback internally it's good Wait, just listen to this. I've seen her before and afters, so I can confirm to you that her actual outsides are good. We're going to ring Eddie and we're going to ask if it's worked.

I'll please answer. He will ring us back. We'll go on to it in a second. Oh, come on. He'll ring us back if not, won't he? You wouldn't know he's not shagged you in that long. Right, carry on. He'll ring back.

Okay, we're going to find out whether it's worked. But yeah, that is something to consider. i am seriously gonna do it let's film the top end it'll be it works okay so we've got solutions so every problem don't worry we're gonna help you fix them you got a bad skit you've got age spots spf loose fanny we've got your solutions girls yeah okay one of the things um that can happen though is your fertility dip and i do think this is one of the nothing you can do nothing you can do guys so let's just fucking get over it but one of the i think this is one of the big worries when you hit your 30s if you've not had children oh god because i think you start i would have really

you've gone under yeah i think you start to panic and you do know that your fertility is going down it is there's just no doubt about that you feel like time's running out because you've got to meet somebody you're like i've got to meet someone i've got to be with them so yeah and then you start doing these calculate i think i started doing that from 25 you start panicking no yeah right i didn't at all and i'm glad i've got fear because i feel like the pressure's off however and i do you're gonna freeze your ex i'm gonna think about that in about a year um i think you should i think i will in about a year yeah so basically mine after this baby you've got a husband don't talk to me about freezing your eggs okay um i'm the one that's single so

basically i think i'm not going to sit here and be like women don't be silly you don't need to feel like that i'm just going to be honest and be like i get why some women feel like that and i probably would as well start thinking about your kids do you want children if you do do it on your fucking own do you not have any more people so let me tell you this my mum the other day we basically do yeah well yeah exactly my mum was like um lauren i wouldn't mind you having another baby and would you have one i was like well yeah i would if i met the right person however haven't and i'm not doing it on my own she was like you wouldn't be on your own you've got me and i thought no no i was like whoa are you suggesting that she's the dad that she no mate are you suggesting

that i get a sperm donor and she went well women do it oh no i need to tell you no she's being serious yeah no i need to tell you about this so i've got a podcast that um if you want like a more serious like chat about this have a listen it's rather than lauren's mum wanting to be her own baby her own daughter's baby dad where the fuck do i start is what it's called yeah that is so good you've not even fucking i haven't listened to it i listened to 20 minutes and then thought i've got a kid i don't want another you know our friend beep yeah who has had her eggs frozen well she got a really good number of eggs she got 11 that is good really good number and she went into um the clinic one day

eggie knickers sorry so she went into the clinic one day and um for like one of her fertility appointments and she said that

it was sperm donor day so did she see who was there and she saw them and she said that one of the men didn't even have a phone when they were like

what's your phone number he was like I don't have a phone and she was like I could she honestly she has now said those eggs will not be used

after what I witnessed because she cannot make children with these she was like they were just there may not have been anything wrong with them on paper but you just wouldn't want that to be by the way i'm only telling you what i've heard from someone yes that doesn't mean it's true accurate we've all got different opinions yeah could you not just go out on that you get pregnant yeah yeah so i said to my mom i was like mom if i am gonna have another baby i won't get a sperm donor i'll pick someone and shag them no i won't I watched that programme about that man

that goes around in a van on Facebook and donates his sperm to women. And he's had like over... Like the ice cream man. Yeah, basically. He puts on the jingle and everyone runs out. Women on Facebook that are ready for a baby. Right.

They know when they're ovulating. He comes round. This has got to be America. No, it's here. What? I will find... We need to watch it. When is he coming to my house?

So, you put on Facebook when you're ovulating. He comes round. I haven't even got Facebook. He can have sex with you. or he will turkey baster and there was women who had multiple children with him okay i feel like he's not involved in any way in the child's life like he signs do you want to know something that's crossed my mind going back to baby daddy one no no no not to have sex to have ivf and take the sperm again no listen to me listen hear me out she's gorgeous it would

be a sibling i already got an agreement with how it works it'd just be one more kid i know what i'm getting because i'm in here where you start i know where i stand yeah and it'd be stunningly beautiful and genuinely it is something he's single at the minute as well so steal the sperm get the sperm now it's it i would it's something that and i'm really being serious it has crossed my mind but i don't want another kid right now because i'm living my best life so i don't want to say that you need to have kids would you have a surrogate no because i don't have a problem with the pregnancy it's the man no i mean like but like if money was not a thing no i'd have my own oh well you know my answer on that i know but i like the kicking in the tummy and i like the

it's your baby no no you don't like the kicking yeah but i'm only you know like how many more can i give yeah you've done two that's enough yeah but like it's your baby like and i no no i love that anyway i have got a mumsy side to me haven't i actually got a really kind of mumsy side in all in all of this but i do think kids is a pressure and one thing i want to discuss anyone listening stop asking women when they are having children oh my god i hate that stop that don't ask a woman when she's having a child i had my miscarriage how many and we'd obviously we just got married how many people like so when are you having kids and some days i literally felt like saying well actually yeah you should have done you should have been like well i've just lost

like stop it and also when you're in early pregnancy i literally just hid in the house because so many people go oh you're not drinking because you're pregnant well excuse me you cheeky bastard you cheeky fuck no don't ask people that and also some people don't want kids so this is the other thing um there's a stigma around not wanting children i think in your 30s and when you're in your 20s and people mention kids you're still figuring things out so nobody puts the pressure yeah when you hit your 30s and you genuinely don't want children yeah everyone starts to notice now yeah because you're not in your 20s anymore they're like she's not had kids if you're in a relationship you know what you should be having them now is she not does she

not want kids i won't hold it against like your nan what does your nan not she say stuff like that i don't have one right no but you know what i mean like old people are always yeah they're a little bit backwards aren't they and a little bit old school but i just think like now in your 30s if you're in a relationship and you haven't had children now is when you're going to get started to people that's going to start saying well they're in the 30s if you're just not having them right you don't want kids i agree fine okay don't have them that um program is called four men 175 babies 176 when i get hold of him the other things people start worrying about is the fact that their career might not be where they wanted yeah ash what would your advice be

if someone's in the 30s and they feel like the career i think you do think about things in your 30s because you start thinking like i need to make a choice here piss off the pot circumstantially if you're 30 and you're single and you've got no ties and commitments as in kids like an ill family member or anything like that i honestly would go and do a year in london or dubai or another city i agree don't you think i agree one thing i wish i'd shake you up and then you'll have to like fend for yourself and learn a lot from yourself i think we can get complacent and we can stick to an easy route easy ride and just what we used to get up in the morning we have one life like if you've not got children yeah just go somewhere i've still got in me that i still feel

in me that i am not it i can imagine you do i'm not meant to be in england i know i'm not and i believe that i can give there a better life not yet not whatever do you know do you believe that like i just want to say career wise at 30 you have absolutely every right to sit there and think am i earning what i thought i would be at 30 as women we need to be very careful of this because of the gender pay gap and it's still a fucking thing and it shouldn't be have a look at mother pucker's page she's got loads of stats on there and she could really good advice on hr stuff have a look at her and a white house i think her name is anyway career wise instead of kind of looking at it as a negative like my career look at it as a positive you're in your 30s you're confident you

know where your life's at now is the time if you're not happy to make a fucking change or this career that you're not happy with you're not going to be happy in your 40s either so right now while you're at a good age to do so what i was going to say is go into your boss's office and be like i'm 30 now mate i've got a mortgage use it to your advantage this 30 thing do you still want like word it as like is there progression not like that they'll be like Is there progression and am I able to increase my salary? How can I? What can I do?

And then you know where you stand and if the answer's no, but you're happy in your job. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hi. Hi, Di, you all right? Lauren's thinking of getting that fanny tightening thing. Did you think it worked? Yeah, it definitely worked.

Really? Did you feel like you could tell when you would do, like, internally? Yeah. Oh, really? It was really tight. Brilliant. Okay, thank you, Ed. Thanks, hon.

No worries. Bye, love. He's so... He was so serious. He was so serious. Oh, bless him. He was so serious. Do you think we put that on?

Yes, that goes on. That has to absolutely go on. Oh, my God. Eddie, my heart. Just the way he was like, yeah, definitely. Yeah, so serious. thank you eddie um i guess i'm gonna have to get it done then where were we before he ran back i don't know can't remember anymore yeah right so guys you go to work to do what earn money to live

life if you're not earning what you want like i was having a conversation with a friend the other day and she was like i'm on 24 grand a year and i was like okay and how many hours are you working she's 30 and she went well that's just my industry unless you're happy with that like this is the thing but how could you be we all need to be earning way more yeah and we all want more money

but what I'm saying is you need to look at what you want to live the life you want and how you can achieve that write it down use your 30s instead of

it's like I'm 30 I'm not where I thought I'd be well get your finger out your arsehole yeah and make it where you want it to be so that when you get

to your 40s you can chill okay so that's another thing houses don't rely on men yeah no no like we've got friends

who are like it's fine I'll just meet a rich man no do you know how hard that is babe no no no no but like even like would you want a life like that no no because what if they fuck you off they would they would they would use you like you're you know but ash i'm gonna say

something now that people are gonna be thinking and i'm gonna let you answer it actually you've done that you've married a millionaire yeah but i still work yes so here i'm just saying because i know what people will say i'm on maternity leave and there's a difference there's a big difference here because you have grafted you work hard you have your own thing you've got your own savings you've got your own shit so i know people are going to say that ash so i'm like preempting i honestly what they might think about you they have to compliment your life like i agree but don't you need to live without them if you have to that someone's going to save you because they're not you are the only person that can save yourself i fully agree with that and i've experienced and

lived that houses people often worry that they haven't bought a house in the 30s i don't have my own house i've got two honey yeah i know i'm really proud of you thank you and people don't know that actually um so i think the thing is with this you'd be surprised to know that the average age of a first time buyer is 34 years old so let's put this into context so that friend i was saying before she's 30 and she's on 24 grand a year you carry on and i'll work out what she's taking home a month okay as a single so yeah 34 is the average age so if you're thinking i haven't got a house yet it isn't the be all and end all you know not everybody has got one yet it's something again you can sit down and focus on do you even want one people put so much stigma and

like around renting or not you do what feels right for you the cost of living has gone up so to save now is so so much more don't beat yourself up loads of people are in the same situation an average salary is the 24 000 okay so what's that kind of coming out with like just under two grand a month no 1654 okay so then you've got your rent rent is so expensive if you're renting so that i i reckon that's a grant like takes you down let's say like bills and rent probably a grand yeah so you've got 650 quid like petrol yeah car insurance phone food so how are you meant to save up to buy a house like no one lots of people are in this position please don't feel down about yourself if you've not when we release this will be long gone but this is what everyone was talking about

this week because kirsty alsop that woman yeah um what what home of the hammer is it or something like that you'll know who i mean the one with dark hair yeah basically she said location location location that's it she said if you cut out your netflix your holidays and your daily coffee and you and you live under a rock then you can afford to buy a house right so in this case why would you want to why would you want to not have a happy life imagine you without holidays exactly not happening mate i'd rather live like homeless but like how are you meant to save if if that's it honestly you're left with 600 quid a month what so average house price is about 200 it's 230 actually right average house price throughout the country you need a 20 deposit

more actually now more sometimes yeah after covid how much would that be about 50 grand say yeah you're gonna need a lot of money it's not easy how the fuck can you save 50 grand with 600 quid at the end of the month so don't feel rubbish if this is you now i just said before i've got two houses let me just that wasn't let me just explain how so again if you're listening and you're some of our younger listeners take my advice here i we earned a lot of money in our old job yeah we did and people often on the awful website yeah we did work hard it was my life on the awful website how she got this how she got that i will tell you now how i did that because i kept my fucking head down i didn't i lived with my mom i saved up i got enough money to buy a house then another one

yeah we bought and that's how it happened doesn't just happen overnight you have to start this young age don't be fucking stupid and i had like every month when i would get paid literally straight out that morning same i would log on to my online bank and i would move it out of the bank account because it wasn't needed i didn't see it as my money the same as soon as it came in it would go and i could watch it clocking up and then i bought a house and then and that's how you do it my mom and dad said to me like you don't have to pay rent while you're here same but you have to promise me that you are saving exactly amount a month exactly i did and um while you've got the if you've got the opportunity to do it and the worrying thing is not everyone has because

ash the money we used to make we could also do that but not everyone can 30 as well you've already run yourself into like you've got a certain car you've got a certain apartment yeah you've got this this and this and your life costs this and your outgoings how do you save as your income is but you know what is it really the worst thing in the world having to rent forever no because you can move wherever you want you can do what you want you're not tied down to anything you're not having to sort out a burst water pipe exactly exactly i've just had a phone call that one of my one of the houses had a burst water pipe so that now at the end of the day like i do feel like in this country we've got this stigma attached to like having you have to buy a house

you have to have a kid fuck that if you don't have a house but you can still afford your rent on your own place yes fucking smashing and if you're enjoying going for lunch with your mates and not worrying about money instead of you could die tomorrow exactly one thing and like you have a child and then your life's over anyway so one of the things that we've just been saying is you live once and one thing i've learned and if anyone said what do you want in the next five years what's your goal it's to be happy it sounds so cliche but honestly it is and i don't know what happy might look like but whatever it is as long as i'm happy if you are happy i agree then it doesn't matter just live this moment i agree and that's what we're saying about like the whole don't think

that someone's gonna save you because like what how would that look yeah would it look happy yeah it wouldn't so being happy i do honestly though think that the freezing of the eggs i've spoken about it before i think that makes sense and i think that if it means that you are going to put your head on your pillow at night and think i'm not worried anymore yeah i think that's i think it's worth it and also they've got some really good finance packages that you can take out if it is something you want to do that and i just think that as well in relationships say you were 35 plus you'd be going into them thinking we're not on a clock here yeah yeah that's true we've got time and that's the thing i think why people do start to panic about the 30s you feel like the

clock is ticking and girls it is it is in the fertile sense but you can put a spin on that take control so many of my friends in their late 30s have met people who yeah have already had a life and have kids and stuff but they've got like the best relationships yeah this is one of the things i think you need to think about let's take away the positives from being in your 30s so you are much wiser you have learned so many lessons so when i think about how i am now like you guys know most of the lessons i've learned like we've laughed at them same as me and you've learned made lessons because you've made mistakes so one of the things is you are much stronger and you've got advice to give to people you've got a good like you're wise i think we have i think we have

yeah we don't know it all no but you know a lot more but we will friendships so in your 30s the majority of your friends are life friends so in your 20s i think people come and go you meet different people within work but not genuine friendship no new friends yeah they're not genuine friends i'm constantly making you friends though this age you have to be careful because like most people that want to seek you out and be friends with you like they've got a reason yeah and i think in your 20s they come and go but in your 30s you have a more solid base that you can rely on these friends they are your ride and die at work like the ones that are still in there in your life now are the serious ones that we met at like 21 or whatever you're still around there's

people that come in and out have to be no not at all we totally change paths so exactly and i think the people that you've got they've got your back in the ride or die that is very important and that's nice that's nice to have i think as well in your 30s you know what you want from someone you've had the fuckboys i mean if you're still enjoying the fuckboy phase fine it's up to you mate enjoy if you're still into a little toxic fuckboy go for it but i think you know what the set yeah this is sex is way better when you're in your 30s this is something that i am really enjoying at the minute i feel like women not the sex no this is what i feel like is really good and i don't know if it's my age therefore the women i'm around at this age or if it's like a movement

in society but i feel like sex as women is becoming more okay there's no sluts the slut shaming's going down it's still slut oh there is still there i think that's because we surround ourselves with people who like to empower other women whereas there's probably other girls out there they're like she's shagging everyone what i'm what i don't know if it's this i'm older therefore the people around me are a bit more liberal i think in your 30s you're more liberal like we've just said the stuff we share on here we never would have shared before so my friends like if someone's like i'm gonna go and have a one-night stand like go on girl get on it and i love that and i don't know as long as it's safe and i don't know that you're not going under the

next day yeah and the next day we're like fuck it you're a woman you want to use protection yeah you're just you're sensible and i don't know if it's the age i don't know if it's society in general i think it's what do you think charlie you're younger than us do you feel like slut shaming is going down a bit and women are being a bit more like i wanted a shag so i went and got one do you think it's because we're older i was gonna say i think it's more like what ash was saying is that i don't really surround myself we don't surround ourselves with judgy bitches okay so you feel like the people around you are maybe that's what it is then the people around me are good but i just think in your 30s women are like go get it girl same with the same mentality yeah

but i think in your 30s you've you've got rid of the fuckers and you've got the people there and i think we can be more liberal about our bodies as well yeah that's what i mean like now nothing to be ashamed exactly and i feel like that from my 30s that has come out much more i never hear people saying she shags everyone because nobody cares feeling very confident and you're feeling a bit shit and you're feeling a bit worried stop worrying worrying isn't going to solve anything sit down and make a list yes great get the thoughts out of your head put them on paper but worrying and being negative it negativity breeds i agree so stop doing that sit down one night with a glass of wine write down all the things that are worrying you and

then you know glance at that from time to time make some notes take some bits off but girls get out there and have fun just have fun body confidence i think your body confidence goes a bit higher because you are what you are almost you've accepted it yeah you're not the spring chicken and trying to be all these things you might have a saggy bit here or there but i do feel like you're kind of like it's me and also like if no one likes it then you know what go fuck yourself yeah exactly so i think in your 30s you can choose which way this goes the narcissists that are going to put you down exactly you can choose which way you're going to go with these 30s so you're either going to go under about it and sit there and be like i'm not what i thought

i'd be at family parties i'm single everyone's married and having so you can do that way more pros about being single than in the wrong relationship if you want to do that girls in your 30s do that or you can be like i'm fucking 30 i'm looking good i'm feeling good i am strong now i've learned so much from my 20s yeah i'm so confident i'm going to give advice to my younger make sure you're enjoying day to day enjoy yeah every day enjoy it and if you're not now is the time to change it and readdress it's a good time to look at it work thinking great i'm going to accomplished listen not everyone loves work i get that but if you're going and thinking i'm earning money for my next holiday i've got to get it done exactly then that's fine do it if there's anything

anyone around you anything you want to change get it done now in your 30s while you're strong and you've got a good head on your shoulders yeah and that make it positive as well the fact that at work you are taken more seriously that is true so did you know 80 of male business owners said that they would take a woman more seriously now more likely to give her a job in the 30s than in the 20s yeah and i do think when i meet people i'm taken seriously by everyone you're not intimidated i also think when you've had a child sometimes that's the case if you say i've got a child i don't know why because i ain't got a fucking clue well unfortunately it is like the it's the biggest responsibility in the world exactly so yeah in your 30s you're going to be taken more seriously

so do something about that guy cougar oh i love being a cougar are you one i don't think that like i'd say um 10 years plus is a cougar yeah i don't what's that so that what would make the guy i'm 31 oh my god i'd be 19 no no no no no could you shag a 21 year old i wanted to yeah they don't look 21 they don't god the facial hair on these young boys nowadays what are they putting like just for men like growing just for me i don't know what they're doing right but they're doing something because they don't look 21 their jaw lines have you noticed the young men's i think that we just fancy young men now do you think that means i've hit a certain bracket like the the shoulders are so strong yeah and their skin the skin's so soft and veiny have you

seen the veins on their arms and i think it's because we fancy young men is it and that must be how old men look at young girls i've noticed that yeah that must be like us looking at the young boys because i've never but it is a thing and i think if you're in our age now you think like i'd just like to look at you yeah yeah i could oh i could give you a good yeah that's what i mean like uh yeah and i don't know what that is but in your 30s you can be a bit of a cougar and I think that's good because you get the confidence as well. These young boys, we keep speaking about young boys, don't we? We like young boys.

I don't know why. But yeah, that's what we're on at the minute. So if you're in your 30s, you can be a cougar. So we hope you've enjoyed that ramble about being 30. And basically, our conclusion is it's not the end of the world. The clock is ticking. Even now, you've just wasted an hour of your life listening to us. so just be positive and have fun and give zero fucks there you go don't care and if you are

coming into your 30s and you're in your 20s enjoy transition enjoy and transition well i transition with a glass of a cocoon i transitioned with a glass of prosecco in my garden in lockdown it wasn't prosecco actually it was lpr um in my garden that's how i transitioned so well i reckon that i'm probably still 30 because i lost two years to covid can we start making that a thing yeah 30 plus two you're 29 you didn't actually turn 30 oh my god i've never turned 30 nope okay brilliant okay dilemma of the week dilemma of the week dilemma of the week okay so i've been seeing this guy now for six months and the sex isn't great so basically what she's saying is that they've been intimate like on numerous occasions but he splooges like straight away

yeah and she said what have you made that word no it's a thing oh okay um she said the first time that she noticed it she was literally doing an otp assessment okay and over the what's that so right sorry to digress but when you're getting with a guy to make sure that it's worth the head count you have to do an otp assessment she's stroking my leg so she stroked over his cock and he splooged and then she said that it's continued and literally like the maximum he's got is three pumps and a squirt yeah she's tried condoms and he is embarrassed about it hey he needs to go to the doctor is it a doctor thing i don't think it is i don't think it is okay here's my idea it's a psychiatrist i think it's a psychiatrist thing or maybe a few wanks first maybe you're

just too sexy you hot yeah maybe you're too yeah no i don't think that the wanking thing i thought if you had a few because you don't remember young lads used to wank before you went round yeah i remember and they'd get it out and then they could last longer yeah freshly wanked freshly won't be like that at our age would they um so do you think do you think he needs to see a psychologist rather than a doctor i think they need to go and see someone because he must be really embarrassed and she said she really likes him and the other thing is there are way listen if he keeps doing this there's ways around it they would have to do loads of foreplay and she'd need to do what she wanted to do dildos even i know it's not ideal

mate you're laughing but if he's if she loves him and it's it's a thing they're gonna have to work around it different things right no what should we just say like go go see someone because we can't help with i don't think we can help this is beyond our like have you ever had this happen um an early splooge yeah but when i was younger i don't know if i maybe i'm not sexy you know someone i know uh an otp splooge yeah i know about that so how can how can guys so you rub them down and if it's not feeling big you don't bother no unless you obviously really like them anyway you were gonna anyway but that would terrify me do you know when you start seeing someone new do all these thoughts not cross your mind do you know like that's why it's good to do

it really early on my thoughts that cross my mind are like what if he's got a micro penis like a piece of chewing gum in a wig that's why sometimes it's good to get it out the way early door as you know that's what the otp assessment's there for just to check the size yeah but what if it's just bad there has to be the chemistry there and guys if you're listening and also i get anxiety that they're gonna have a dirty or a shit car and that the house is going to be a shithole because once i went around to this guy's house and there was washing up in the sink you must have been really young to him again you must have been young when this happened ash i don't believe you'd go to anyone's house like

that now yeah but you don't know where they live oh yeah do you see what i'm saying yeah there's these concerns that's why when you're on like when you get pictures off guys or you're on dating apps yeah you check the fixtures and what would what would concern you more bad sex or um a scruffy house scruffy i couldn't live with it and like house dirty hygiene like because also men hard enough to live with anyway so why the fuck would you want to live with a messy one i think the thing is with the sex thing like it's so hard because sometimes there's nothing wrong with the willy size they're just not good in bed and i don't know how you they're like puppies though you have to teach them train them and teach them yeah like always my good doggy bad weed on the

floor if guys have been single for a really long time they're always horrific in bed because they're like a jurysal bunny like yeah and you're like you've been watching too much porn and shagging too many like one night stands after a night out yeah and and you're just like whoa hold your horses can i tell you what can i tell you a comment that gives me the fear if a guy says i can go all night please don't please don't please don't go all night god please no like can't wait to fuck you all night like what i need to sleep i've got three jobs in a baby not all night i can probably do it once and maybe in the morning that's it like please no you'd be i wouldn't i'd be happy with this then i could go to sleep anyway oh god

okay guys thank you for listening again tune back in next wednesday please share wherever possible i know we say this every single week but we mean it we mean it and we appreciate it and if you guys want to listen to us chat shit every week we need all the fucking shares all the shares okay so follow us on instagram at n-t-n-g-a-f at lauren elizabeth underscore xx and at the cosmetic console we'll see you next week see you next week bye