Nip Tuck - Hot Girls Get Hemorrhoids!

Episode Date: July 15, 2026

Poor Ashley's stuck in the vineyard and there's grapes everywhere! Apparently it's a hot topic and there's some interesting methods she's tried to help treat them... The girls share their solutions for healthy hair, chat social media ban for kids and would you buy pics to make someone jealous of your Instagram? Head over to our socials @niptuckpod and click the link in our bio to find our YouTube, where full video episodes will be released every Wednesday at 5pm. If you're a Patreon member, not only will you get the Wednesday main episode the day before at 5pm, you'll now be able to watch the Friday Bonus too!Get in touch with your questions, dilemmas and Slutty Sue's via our Whatsapp or email [e-mail]

oh are they still really bad can i just have a little chat with you guys about hemorrhoids oh everyone loves the hemi chat everyone loves everyone loves the hemi chat i will do this podcast right and i will get thousands desperate messages ashley it's happened it's the desperation please this is the worst thing in the world ashley help me help me yeah he had this grin he was like like you just paid for it you paid for it and you took her for breakfast yeah but His face, he was so pleased with himself. He kept saying to me, like, can you believe me? You never guessed.

And he walked in and he was just like this. And it was almost as if, like, he'd done the whole, he was so happy with himself. I've done all of that, yeah, but then they go away. And you get a lot of water in the bottom then. It comes out with the water. It's me, it's me. So then, then there's all sorts of...

guys hello welcome to nip tuck nippity-tuckity are here and in your ear what was it peter k used to say welcome to bolton fm coming in your ears chorley fm coming welcome welcome to rochdale i lived in chorley once did you or where the listener with the guy that looked like the jack russell you lived in charlie with jack russell boy yeah i moved there for i mean it was a very short time i lived at home as well but i lived in there for like a short amount of time it was terrible away but at that point nothing seemed to make sense anymore anyway so um i was just gonna say you smell what is that what lucas just went to us somebody smells lovely and i was like yeah it won't be me perfume that megan bought me when we went shopping for her world cup you put

a picture of it didn't you on insta what is it i'll get it out of my bag and show you i'll link it smells good megan's suitcase got lost no she went yesterday didn't she the game's today the suitcase is lost fucking hell what's she gonna do all the other girls are rallying around what giving her bits of outfits oh no when you've planned how's that happened right go on what is it thank you lucas he's just gone and got my bag fragrance dubois siren i'm gonna put how much i've used already let me put a bit on so i can see if i want it is it like three four hundred it was expensive yeah they are yeah i really like it it's almost unusual it's like oody but there's a spit of vanilla has it got vanilla in it there is something sweet yeah there's a mix it reminds

to me for like the uae and yes and that's that's what we all want to smell like expensive i think when you go to dubai as soon as you get there it's in the airport smells of money arabic men arabic rich smelly smell nice man just on the case sorry yeah does she not put an air tag in yeah like this is serious still put an air tag in it but it's not got on the plane oh so she knows where it is yeah yeah it's gonna come to a hotel but oh that when you've meticulously outfit makeups and first game first game guys oh shit so what's she gonna like she's just gonna borrow from people but how can she borrow a pickford top i think we might sell it at the store and then she might be able to like knot it or something yeah oh please bear with us guys if

there's stuff that we're talking about now and you're like girls we're over that yeah i guess that's old that's old news like this week we'll fill you in on we'll bring you back a month but like molly may's just won the white dress she lee andrews has just come out of prison right can we talk about that because i've not seen it so what he's he's he out i genuinely don't think he was ever in prison do we have proof that he was don't know i don't know i'm like boring i think it was interesting for a bit so bear with me i messed up my beauty schedule and i had a micro spicule peel at skin address okay don't worry pregnancy safe but then i bought a spray tan that was stupid i thought it would be okay honestly from here and even up close it doesn't look bad it's the neck

oh well we can't because i didn't spray my face but then i spray my chest i think a bit's gone there so guys please bear with me how hard is it to time your beauty stuff nice right really nice what's that i had a vita liberata spray really nice the girl that does my spray tans is amazing and i'm not quite ready to tell you her name because then i won't be able to get in understanding but i might actually just say to her like can i have a regular slot so i think that's really important because when you don't when you have to get so like your nails your lashes your hair you have pre-booked yeah things like spray tans are kind of a whim or you're going somewhere once a week in summer and you go if you go in somewhere you book it in but then they can't get you in and

and really and then you can't be arsed and you forget and then it's too late so really i actually agree if you can have that weekly but it's the you've got to time everything come at half six in the morning oh amazing but it's getting it all off on time like you gotta be dead at six in the morning perfect because i have my bath the night before i take it all off she comes to mine at six in the morning and she does the clear vita dark tan right and so it's clear so i just look like me normal darker throughout the day nice and then you don't nice i much prefer when you've got time to tan in the morning who was it that was talking about barbara the other day again oh barbara's a celebrity she's a she's a you need have you met her oh um daisy that does our

massages came around to mind you need to meet bar she's is she amazing she's just lovely she's absolutely lovely she's so girls on patreon they love her one of them said the other day like how do i go about this i don't want any tan lines because i'm going away and i was like just say to her babs i'm gonna be nude i was like she don't give a fuck and she's got these little cuppy things anyway but i was like if i wanted to be nude i just like this is what i've got tan it tan my clit like fine not us but she's she's sound she's really good tan my flaps bitch mine are that's my mine are that low now i'd get a tan line i'd have to lift them up they're just skinny as fuck what like so you you've got out no no no my app my outer labia

it just has no volume it's just thin now like everywhere don't fanny shame we don't find no arse is what it is i've had two kids i'm 30 like whatever i've got a saggy neck too but it's just like the volume can we just sorry we've really digressed here but my mind is the guy you sent me the gynecologist guy in america what's his name we spoke about him let me because you get it have a look so this guy i mentioned him a few weeks ago on the pod and it's this american gynecologist and he does fanny procedures every single day well obviously he's a gynecologist yeah that's what he does he's a fanny doctor and um he a downstairs doctor love that he seems lovely she sent me his page in the day but the thing that made me laugh is he whole he has like um

a diagram like a 3d thing do you remember east is east when the fanny got chucked on the guy it's like that and he holds it in his area let me just so he's called the cosmetic guy so the cosmetic gyn he's got 40 000 followers and this this is what gets me he holds the label fanny in his area it's just right and he literally the videos he's got his head the lady is sat there having the procedure and he's like popping his hair like today we've removed this and he shows it's mad removed from the lady and you can't see fanny but you can just see him coming out yeah i just think even if you don't want to touch your fanny and you're not bothered and that's fine i just think it's worth having a look and i like how it normalizes fannies as well i just like him

i like him right anyway so back to what we're saying so megan's lost a case what have we been up to because i was just gonna say i spoke to megan and then it led me on to the baby shower yes so my friends planned a surprise baby shower for me so how this happened right so on thursday i was in a mood i've been in a weird place because you've moved house i've been in a discombobulated relationship honestly i'll talk about it another time but i've been odd off like off kilter i can't find your stuff i'm off kilter i'm like i was like am i depressed am i depressed have i got it's not not okay anyway thursday i was in a right mood it was raining Callum rang me I was like Callum ringing me for and I thought oh something Ashley's had

the baby or something I was like oh well hello you know babes what you doing on Sunday and I was like really busy didn't know what it was I just thought I'm not doing it whatever it is and he's like I was like I'm really busy I've got um all sorts of things and he was like right okay because um well you're gonna have to make time I was like why and he was like I'm doing a surprise baby shower for Ashley and I was like well I could move things around because I'd already told him how busy i was i was like i can move some things around i'll have to confirm later i was probably quite rude to him um because i was in a really bad mood i was probably rude to him and i was like right it's fine but what is it is there do i have to get dressed up anyway so then i calmed down

later i was like yeah i'll be i'll be there of course what time and i said he said to me i'll add you to the group chat and i said callum if you add me to a group chat i will tell everyone every secret i know about you and he was like oh fucking hell better not anyway you told half them on the pod anyway i was like yeah but i didn't say your name anyway so from what i can gather him and lola decided that this could potentially but who knows in our fucking life be the last baby yeah and they wanted to do something which is you love i wish i was that friend i'm not that friend what lovely it was an actual surprise so um tell us from your perspective ed was like you need to get out of bed today and i was like no i don't and he was like you really

you do like this isn't okay and he's like opening the curtains like when you're in a deep depression and someone's like no we need some so like like and i was like no just go away yeah and he was like no really and i'd had this peel and i looked like shit i did i looked like shit you didn't know the best version of yourself i was wearing my pajamas yeah and so he took me for breakfast and then um i don't know he's always weird anyway so did you notice he was being weird or no he's always he's always off a bit odd odd guy so like you didn't really notice and we had a little snowy with why is she the cutest she's so cute it's those little teeth she's always like this i know it's the white hair and the white hair she's just like she always looks confused she wants to cuddle

daddy all the time she's lovely she's so so cute so anyway we went for breakfast and then get home and i was like i want a frozen yogurt on the way home so i got a frozen yogurt get home and i was like why is megan's car parked randomly on the road there and i didn't didn't register and then i've got out the car and then jerry comes up behind me and i screamed i was like ah i bet you thought fuck off and she was like i was like what are you doing and she was like all dressed up and she's like i'm here to see megan i was like megan doesn't live next door anymore like what megan doesn't live and then she was like well and then yeah and i was like what the fuck um but it was a really nice day so thank you all of my friends well we so while you were i

got there at like i think like half an hour before you came and we were like doing bits and bobs and stuff was it fun yeah it was really fun i went in and lola was a bit like so we were like doing bits and taking pictures and like me and your dad were filling up oh i had such a lovely chat so oh i just he's such a nice man so it's filling up the thing and your mum was doing a usual and we were like filling up the champagne and stuff um and then ed what i thought was really cute the look on ed's face right as he was that proud of himself as if he had organized this whole thing he had this grin he was like like you just paid for it you paid for it and you took her for breakfast yeah but his face he was so pleased with himself like can you can you believe you

never guessed you didn't get and he walked in and he was just like this and it was almost as if like he'd done the whole he was so happy with himself yeah and but yeah so the theme was real housewives of new york yeah megan came head to toe in pink poochie she got the the pink the pink she absolutely loves any form of like character dress-up theme absolutely loves it yeah but callum had actually said to me we're not dressing up so i wasn't dressed up and then again no one told me that so i was in black like at a funeral um but anyway so we yeah it was really cute there was like i don't know who did the food and stuff ed sister i think really it was really nice so it was like um new yorkie food so it's like bagels with what's it called the pastrami is it yeah

like stuff like that and then there was really cute biscuits and oh my god there was these mini um chocolate eclairs and i was just yeah i was scooby snacking them it was nice and the kids stayed out of the house yeah where were they and christine sarah i saw christine at some point as very confusing i was in my car i'll tell you about that actually i've trialed a defender so i was in that so they were like calum's like you need to move your car off the drive and i was like she won't know it's mine but i moved it anyway because then you'd be like why is there a car on my drive but i thought she's that pregnant she won't i wouldn't you would have just been like get me back to bed yeah we surprised her and she was very you were surprised

i was i had a lovely day i left after like an hour and a bit because i had to go back to defender did you just like carry on eating and yeah yeah just had a nice just had a lovely time catch up with my friends um and yeah and then you were like then i was like i'm going to bed now yeah so you can stay or leave so i'm really pregnant now i will have had the baby by the time talking about this but i'm 36 one so technically right it could come at any point if you weren't having a section yeah because sections are always a bit early in case of natural labor you would have three and a bit more weeks like you would have four you'd have four you'd have a deal with me like this four more weeks it would be hard no you've been fine but it's hard now isn't it you'd

have four weeks left mate like i am throwing suppositories up my ass for fun why can you not poo no or just because you're bored coming out really the hemorrhoids are hanging oh are they still really bad can i just have a little chat with you guys about hemorrhoids oh everyone loves everyone loves everyone loves i will do this podcast right and i will get thousands desperate messages ashley it's happened it's the desperation please this is the worst thing in the world ashley help me help me yeah on patreon ashley why are you all coming to you never mind like skincare advice foundation you know who i went to callum so callum had one that was really bothering oh sorry i did say i would tell you secret this was like years ago and i remember

being like oh like um i've like had them in late pregnancy but never like just normal no do you remember that time i got one and i sent you and christina a picture of it and it was like a bluebird yes right so i remember that well after my facelift it was horrendous so i took too much codeine without taking the laxative stuff as well so when you're on painkillers girls and especially after you've had a c-section or you're constipated whatever make sure you take laxative alongside because it will get to even just like a light one you don't have to go heavy with the laxative just something to like loosen so basically here's my tips for hemorrhoids because i don't want to keep you on this subject for too long zeta west psyllium husk tablets right these are fiber in a capsule

okay okay fucking unreal if i remember to take them you're all right no hemorrhoid no hemorrhoid but then once it happens i'm like oh yeah it's too late then you've already created it so the zeta west psyllium husk tablets other brands do them but i just those ones work for me um pre and probiotics yeah the epitome amazing um these are all like long-term things don't worry i'm gonna save you all for the further we're gonna do the urgent one in a minute the frida mom witch hazel oh in a pump put that on your bot bot suit oh okay then you can also get off amazon witch hazel pads you can put them up your on your knickers one thing that works on some hemorrhoids if they're not too big is sugar white sugar on a cotton wool pad what tiny bit of water like a

tissue of water white sugar hold it on your arsehole right and it will shrink your piles is it because it um the sugar absorbs is it because of that thing that scientific term that i can't remember osmosis that we learn in science where it takes the water from one side to another no honestly i went on sugar uses osmosis to draw out excess fluid temporarily reducing swelling lucas this episode's called osmosis for hemorrhoids we are so clever right so basically i was watching tiktoks one day when i was i was crying my eyes out i used to work at the alexandra hospital and my friend is like the big boss there and she's probably like dealing with all kinds of shit she sees right now yes you try to book in to have it out it was no when you've got one girls that

get it get it like hot girls get i've only ever had it hot girls get hemorrhoids oh that's the episode title there we go so sugar on a pad on the arse lie in bed no disturbance or i used to put it on my arse in the bath because then you can rinse the bath off after um anus all suppositories are the best ones but you need to get the ones with the steroid inside them right so basically like i'm so naughty i went into boots the other day and i was like hello behind the counter suppository anusol hemorrhoid stuff please and the lady was like you know you can't take these when you're pregnant and i was like not for me eyes here yeah not i know i know these are not suitable in pregnancy

my asshole is fine and then waddling out this poor lady was like you can't you know she couldn't be like well you are clearly and you're like pregnant i know and i was just like my husband's got piles they can't prove you're pregnant um then there is another cream that i get off amazon and i'll link it in patreon but basically it is this cream that's got like witch hazel and arnica and stuff inside it so i think because it's got that like menthol-y oh oh you put it on your bum and it gives you the immediate calming and then there's a spray that you can put there's a lot of things for hemorrhoids if honestly you wanted to be rich invent something for hemorrhoids because people will fucking yeah because you don't want that um i even my hemorrhoids were that bad i even

odd oh my god what a butt plug no you fucking didn't so put the hemorrhoid in and keep it in i thought you had like a little metal one with like a little heart yeah no i do i put the butt plug in like the fridge and i thought i'll use it as like a tampon device up my ass to keep them up we do not recommend that oh my god so james when he next gets a bad pile i might say to him okay you're gonna have to put but you can get all kinds so basically butt plugs don't work just walk around the house with your finger up your ass instead um if it stings could you not try the ice trick just pop a few ice cubes up there i've done all of that yeah but then they go away and you also like in the bottom then it comes out with the water

me then there's all these stickers so you can get a stick in the back of your ass. I even ordered them. Fucking every time the office would drive in, it was crazy. Just face. Face. What is this?

And I'm there in my dressing gown. I can't even wear clothes. Fucking 10 million grapes coming out of my ass. Chuckle, true boredom. it's awful it's horrible it is I'm really sorry

but that's why you've got to laugh about the hemorrhoids and like I used to you know when I first suffered I used to keep it

to myself and now now I'm suffering now you will literally tell anyone and everyone if

And did you used to deal with it in silence? I used to deal with it on my own. I've healed. I used to secretly order both places. Oh, my God. Right. Sorry, guys. Just give me a minute because my makeup's literally running.

I'm so sorry you've gone through that. Right. Have you never had one? Never had one. At the end of... Did you get bumped? Yes. You've never been bummed

Maybe the trick is to get bummed Lucas doesn't get bummed that much Lucas doesn't get bummed that much I think they're hereditary I got one At the very end of my pregnancy With Tommy And James put it back in in the bath

Do you remember? He was like He gets them horrendously And I couldn't get my arm round Because of the bump So when we were in the bath I was like And he was like

I will do it so he like pushed it back up and he got a hard on he did yeah told you fucking disgusting he put he put the pile up and he's like oh i was like have you got a that's fucking disgusting he's like sorry um yeah so immediate relief though it did help it did help and then it went after i had the baby it went like i've never had an operation so if anyone wants to collab on a hemorrhoid procedure right so Lucas I'm completely I think we all are

I mean we've gone off that was one of the funniest things we've ever got more off screen I think we need a break let's have a break we're going to be back with a bit more you know organisation right bye guys guys we are back um sorry we needed a minute there after all that frivolity so james back

to like catch up and where we've been at um as i said my mental health has been whoa not good not good um but i'm all right not working um i'm all right today i think isn't it your kid free weekend this weekend coming yeah but james because he's working on the house like he's just outside oh i think do you know what boring right but he won't be working outside because listen to this like honestly it's just one thing after another so he's done his knee in so he is obviously a builder so his job is physical and he's doing the reno on the house and he's done his knee in now i'm too busy to be looking bothering about his knee so i've just like ignored him for a while and he's not he's not a pussy like he and then he rang me for work he was

like it's an eight out of ten in pain like it's and he's still doing full what he's taking pain medication no because he's one of these people that's like no i don't take tablets all right then be in pain you fucking loser like or take a codeine be high as a kite happy as larry and it doesn't hurt as much it's on you so um his knees bad so i was like what do i do what do i do so he's not even like i was like right go to the doctors but he's like well how the nhs system is really hard sometimes it'll take three weeks yeah gp this is the thing so i was like right where do we begin with this situation so i was like right okay i'll book you in the doctors you know i've got private health care oh she's so i have spoken about on the podcast and i've

recommended given you probably got shit for it given you the man she said to me when i told about the knee i was like i don't know what the fuck i'm gonna do because he's gonna have to stop working soon it's really bad like i can't do this and she was like well did you get the private health care that i told you to get and i was like no anyway anyway no never got around to it wish i had so i was like right we ring the doctors it takes two weeks to get in for an appointment then the doctor who's a gp and isn't at whatever goes right i'll refer you losing money every day every day you're taking time off work so i was like what the fuck am i going to do so we know a couple of people at pal mal medical don't we um and i was like hang on a minute so i messaged

and i was like any chance do you have like a scanny device is there anything we can do honestly guys massively massively recommend it they got him in he had a phone call with the gp the scam yeah he had a phone call with the gp it was booked the scan was private gp yeah really quick phone call checking that he wasn't you know whatever a few days later he went in for the scan which was yesterday um and then he said he didn't have much in house yeah he wasn't making it up and just wanted a laugh um day out just wanted a day off so he went for the scan it took 15 minutes and we're just waiting for results so it could be something called a meniscus that's what ed's had twice which is not good not that is surgery no weight bearing no weight bearing i married a

builder so that's not great i married a building for the reno and he can't do the reno like what the fuck and then he got pissed and weight bared on it and then he had to have the whole thing redone again wow that's really not really sorry no but like i'm just affirming no like you have how long six weeks and he had this device that he had to wear all the time on his leg and you have to turn it every day a little bit more so you like so so when you wake up oh my god i think your legs like that and then it has like a thing that you turn are you joking so there's that then there's the acl um so has that gone as well we don't know it could be like normal knee problems are one of the again an operation than meniscus but it's an operation because meniscus they might

have to remove the whole thing the whole leg the remove the meniscus i don't know what a meniscus is it's like um a little bit of muscle fantastic so yeah i mean let's just see guys but honestly if he has we're fucked stem cell injections are really good for it oh are they yeah well maybe that as well so we'll find out i'll let you guys know but i just have to say they were really good so we'll get the results and then i guess we decide what we do next but if it's an operation he's going to be not working for six weeks therefore making any money lauren we've booked in at pall mall um for have you done it the bracket test have you booked it yeah we're going after recording one day in august have you told i'm sure you'll have told me in the chat i forgot

um brilliant right okay so we're doing that as well moral check i'm having the bracket test loads of you messaged me about the bracket test by the way thank you so much yeah with like bits of advice and stuff really helpful someone did say just go and get it done you need to go and get it done but then someone else said don't get it done while you're postpartum because your head up your ass that's a fair point that is a quite a fair point i think i'm gonna decide on the day yeah so we're gonna go there but yeah i don't know how like so if you do like last minute test that kind of thing it just made it so much easier yeah we had to pay yeah it's annoying but the amount of time is available it is but the amount of time that he would have taken off work to do

all the nhs stuff it would have paid for scans so whatever let's say i could be in a deep dark place if he has to be off work for six weeks and can't do the reno for six weeks and i will have to drive all five kids around and pick them up from all the schools in different directions across the northwest or is it in the van he does it in the van they won't fit in my car so i'm gonna have to drive his fucking van as well can i will i'll lose it i won't be back on the pod for weeks i will be i'll lose my head so yeah let's see how that goes um also what would you rather have a hemorrhoid well he'll probably get he'll fucking get hemorrhoids from the operation as well so he'll be moaning about his knee he'll be moaning about his arsehole and i had a section and then

my baby cut out of me and nobody gave a fuck no they don't i said to ed the other day i was like so how long are you having off work he went just two days oh right cool i was like okay they don't give a fuck they don't give a fuck right okay what else have we got to talk about so what about the under 16

social media ban what are your initial thoughts I how does this work right because how are adults still allowed to show pictures of kids on social media

if they've banned it for under 16 so they've banned the usage of it which means that they can't have an account so well then why should someone else

be allowed to post pictures of them then it's not none of it makes sense no but it's not the picture thing what it is is chatting to weirdos it's the the the mental health knock-on effect of snapchat twitter um not i am in full tiktok it's that but then some people have said it's like a government ploy to

get everybody to have a conspiracy theory no but so these are the these are the angles i've looked at the first when i first heard about it i was literally like fucking brilliant great i don't want her to have social media so that is yeah and it's not fair on the parents when they're going like sally has got it such and such has got it it also takes away the culture of social media so i was like great and then i spoke to james about it who gave me different opinions from different people that he'd look because he's really into like different opinions and stuff so he was like well there's different opinions though lauren so one of the things that he said is apparently youtube is comes into that so he was like what about the people the kids who are

really into like teddy with golfing when he gets older and will follow tiktok accounts and will follow like to like education educational to watch people doing what they're really interested in and to learn watch it they just can't have their own account so then they'd have to go but then you'd have to make them your account and then they could just go on it do you know what i mean no they can still watch youtube without an account and tiktok can they yeah so what's the point then of banning it because then they've not got an account to like engage and message people so they can watch it but can't okay so that's right isn't it and then one of the views that i saw online that i i kind of understood they were like why ban it for everyone all you're doing it's just helping lazy parents

that just don't want to put boundaries in themselves no i think you have to ban it for everyone and i kind of understood that as well like mate when i was fucking 14 the shit i used to do on the internet and the i know i agree weirder now i agree on that chat roulette and watch men like yeah not on purpose but the way you'd find it all of a sudden yeah and then like that two girls one cup but yeah i agree so that if they can't access that mom what happened in 2000 well well honey sit down um so it's like i do i do get that two girls one cup but then somebody else said because there's all the different opinions they will still find a way but this time they'll do it secretly and then it's secretive and they won't tell you they're doing it

so you can't say like is everything okay on your social media so there was that as well and then the other big thing is okay so how do we prove that we are not children the way we have to prove it is digital id and a lot of people credit cards and stuff and if you've had the account for a certain amount of years so a lot of people are saying that this is just a way again don't know not my opinion just an opinion it's nanny state and it's in a way of again being like well if you want social media you're gonna need to get the government and it's that kind of thing so there's like all different opinions i at first thought it was a great idea i'd rather she didn't have social media i didn't have it and yes it will be mean i have to parent more but i probably should

anyway you know like i'm like i was like fuck but they sit on me she hasn't got social media that sophie dixon chat i think it's i think i i'm not against it but we will say i don't know when it even comes into play now what it did make you see that diva on the news no sky news were interviewing this yeah and they were like so your screen time this weekend was nine hours now social media's banned what are you gonna do and she went stare at a wall go and cause trouble in the neighborhood yeah that's what i this is the other thing though this is the other issue so when i was 14 i was drinking a bottle of cider on the park and telling my mom i was sleeping out i was drinking i was doing all sorts of weird shit like do you remember

did i'm not saying i did this but did anyone used to get police chases yeah yeah yeah people did all the time egging right so now there's no social media what are they gonna do are they gonna go back to what we used to do look at how we turned out absolutely fine um so yeah i don't know buy fags they can't buy fags either none of our kids will ever be able to smoke a fag in their life why from now if you are under the age of 18 yeah from i think a year ago you will never legally be allowed to buy a cigarette i used to i was 14 when i smoked which is fucking disgusting same i think i had one of my nams when i was like i used to just smoke anything i could find really like weird isn't it but my i don't i feel like the culture's changed

are they going to do that but one thing i did again i heard well actually that's i've got something to say on that because apparently um 90s heroine chic has come back yeah so being skinny and smoking and drinking coffee is like making a comeback and all the people that are just cool it 90s heroine chic kate moss nothing tastes as good as skinny feels yeah a moment and the lips a lifetime on the hips yeah it's all that which is not good it's not a good culture but a lot of people i've seen isn't it weird because everyone's going all pep tidy as well yeah at the same time it's like me inject one thing drink a coffee have a fag like listen balance i think balance yeah people are now saying they're like really fighting against that like stops making fags

yeah and a vape that's not classy not there's in no world is that a cool thing to do like i have tried to stop i'm gonna get one of those i keep saying i'm gonna yeah and i haven't yet um anyway one thing i did think about social media thing if you all have to give id yeah is it going to stop trolling a little bit more because you can now only have a face account no i don't think no because if you have to prove who you are now is that going to stop it won't stop it but will that minimize people all of a sudden deciding to oh my god so these two girls that i follow um i think the bossy mums i think they are two lesbian ladies and they've just had a they had all the drama with the eggs and stuff they were open about it boss mommies and they're lovely

girls absolutely one shorty was out lovely fucking girls anyway they had loads of drama with eggs and i won't go into it but they probably would come on and they're very interesting anyway they're pregnant again and one of them was like oh yeah went to cyprus very early went to cyprus last embryo because they've been fucked over with their embryos and an agreement they'd made yeah very very dodgy dangerous shit so anyway allegedly from their accounts obviously you know we've got to be careful can't come out anything but really lovely girls and she put a post on the other day on her insta and someone had been trolling her like a newish account um you know it says new they make it to troll you then so yeah so she's made it to troll you so she i'm not pushing don't push a

pile up so she went on and it said on it that the account was created five days ago in mauritius so she posted that's very specific so she posted how do you find out where i don't know don't know guys can you tell us and then she posted carly she's called um carly jones i think i'll check her instead and then she posted saying so i know whoever made this account has just been to mauritius on holiday she was like so guys i'm opening the field tell me who's just been to mauritius and she's worked out that somebody has been posted in mauritius uh i don't know and she posted five and she was like yeah we know who it is now so if you're gonna make a fake account fucking be careful if you're gonna stalk your ex be careful where you do it from no i couldn't but

if you're gonna be fucking careful it's a bit like this guy that lives in uh my best friend jack's building he posts pictures of like holidays yeah and we have this game because we found out and they're literally like the promo pictures from the website no he's not going no he doesn't yeah it's like a thing so she pretends he's on holiday and he's not yeah the only time you should ever do that is if you're trying to make a man jealous loads of men do it like so there's this girl that sells pictures for men to buy to make their social media pop so it'll be like she'll be like front row of a fashion show f1 like monaco i beat that on a yacht and they are so obviously you can find out like reverse images but these are legit the real images that's making your profile pop so

like lucas said this guy's faking being on holiday yeah you can easily do that and he does it because he i think he sells like the online trading courses oh yeah i have something can i have two minutes to tell you about something right wow sit sit listening i watched that program on bbc what was it called it's about the only fans thing isn't it it was an only fans program on bbc watch it only fans inside the machine right 45 minutes long you know those guys like hs ticky hockey and stuff like that do you know that that's what they do they manage only fans girls yeah what part of what they do is that he said it in the louis through doc how they it's so bad lauren so basically this isn't by the way just only fans this is we're

talking about all the different websites platforms adult like adult content platforms so say you're a girl and this is like a known thing right so say you're a girl and you're on only fans if you've got like a new profile it'll come up and they've got like these um telegram groups all of these really toxic telegrams quite a thing isn't it and they'll say to the girls like right i'll take you on board my only fans course to make your money from five grand a month into 20 but you have to give me um an agency fee which starts at around 40 but it sounds good if you're only earning so much someone comes along and they're like i'm going to boost your profile you're going to be like oh it's like having a manager yeah okay call them agents and managers and how do they do this

then they blackmail the girls um they well this again not all so they almost own the girls basically yeah um there was one where they like would withdrawing money out of their account because they were logged in um got like changed all the passwords and kicked them out of their own accounts after they'd taken them on there's a guy that we were sat in the sauna with in jack's building and he manages girls and you hear all this why do people now younger generation just have no fucking morals because i would never in a million years no no so when you say the girls like more extreme more extreme videos so how do they when you say manage their page how do they all on this program right so for example how do they make the page bigger say they've got like i don't

know like 30 talent on their roster right there was one guy who came across as like a bit of a better one i think he owned an agency called like rebel or something and he for example rented a house out in cheshire right for a day and they were all allowed to shoot in there right so they okay that then they all get like that i would say that's an agent that's an agent like you're everyone has an agent i'm not against that filmed and stuff like that and they got the house for free and right stuff benefits like that but these other ones are very like oh my god so be careful girls that's really scary isn't it and there was one girl that like they threw bricks through a window they beat her up like and what's the what's the program called again only fans behind the

machine i might watch that that sounds no watch it lauren it's really insightful now here is the section where if you're on a spending ban it's time to put your phone and your credit card away ready forgot about these laura spoken about these for many many many many moons the nutrient skin supplements yeah the vitamin c and the glutathione fucking well expensive do they work yes like the liposome liposomal liposomal which means that they are easy uh to get into your system i've still got some they're brilliant so the vitamin c ones especially for at the end of your pregnancy are really good because they make your skin what was it it's proven they make your skin like 40% more elastic google it so it's altrian a-l-t-r-e-n-t i think google it and have a look at

the website because i can't remember off the top of my head but i remember buying them because maybe good marketing but i remember looking at it and being like no there's got like proven figures here it was like about skin elasticity and the glutathione's for pigment girls glutathione i you can inject that legally all good it's a peptide that's approved you can inject glutathione glutathione is a master antioxidant antioxidant means it takes all the bad shit out your body so it's fantastic for hangovers really good i always do it take one i inject it before and after a night out because it gets the shit out your body but also one of the main things that causes pigmentation it's loads of different things because i'm fucking expert on it is um like

free radicals and what's it called stress of the shit in your body so the glutathione that's what i'm trying yeah glutathione is really good for an internal way to help minimize pigmentation so there you go uh maybelline sky tubes mascara i've got it on today it's unreal which one's that the one that live atwood promotes do you get i keep because my eyelashes are starting to grow a tiny bit at the bottom i keep getting them like i put my mascara on i'll go and do something and i've got all black under my eyes try this prequel body lotion absolutely sensational i've got an oil that i've been using at home but then i put the prequel over the i've not heard of that it's an american brand and i bought it ages ago it comes in a tube about this big fucking huge it's like 20 quid

ceramide we love a ceremony like a ceremony unreal uh the decipher custom foundation drops they're in a pipette dropper and basically if you're going on holiday or if you've got like a travel makeup bag these are the perfect thing to put in there because they're really they're like water they go on like a skin tint they're buildable which is good but they're like that big so do you mix them with something or put them directly on either or so you could mix them with your moisturizer i even have mixed them with my face or with your foundation your fake tan or right okay i think my code is ashley ashley 20 i do work with them um but they're very good the fenty beauty fairy bomb puff that's a lot of things in it it's this big it's a love heart

powder poof and what are you gonna do with it's infused with glittery smelly stuff it's such a you things such a me thing um nala's baby vanilla yes i you told me about yes nala's baby's lovely and from what i can gather okay for sensitive yeah so the vanilla cloud stuff just smells i love a nice smelling baby delicious uh the rock lip volumizer i just reach for it all the time easy it's a treatment it's gorgeous it's cooling my lips have really swollen at the minute it's just lovely um the little people big dreams books heard of them but can't think why so they sell them in selfridges they sell them on amazon as well and basically they're about that big a little book and you can get them for boys or girls and it's like for example like princess diana

yeah that's what i knew i knew i'd seen it but i couldn't think different people and it tells the kids about who they are i like that but they're very aesthetic and they're good for them as well like your learning shit if they ever asks me anything about history that is not my strong point so i wait till they're gonna have school i never know the answer like she'll say to me mom in the world war and i'm like i don't know sorry i don't know remember when you used to get tea bag and stain paper yes i used to like and crinkle it all up yeah when you're doing like an anne frank thing right i got sisters and seekers it's called the tommy vintage rugby shirt it's very me it's very nice it's always out of stock but it's back in i got the fenty skin

butter drop vanilla body i think you've already said that you've had this and i saw a girl that i follow called so stylish soap and i love her and she said it was great so i thought right i'm gonna get it done i got some red capri pants from asos and i just think that's just such a cute look with like black sunglasses black sunglasses and little black shoes um i got myself the rimmel spice lip liner it's the same as my lip blush it doesn't look like i've got that much cappuccino is also yeah i always grab a rimmel one because i just think like they're cheap and if you lose them it's fine i got a tea tree oil soap bar from amazon because james is convinced that it's really good for any fungally skinny things uh the aldi coconut clusters are very nice not as local as i

thought they would be but a lovely little snack they're like all clustery things they're nice um and then everyone's been asking me this on insta some weekday balloon pants they have them in gray in white and in black and they are the perfect i wore them at the baby shower in black perfect trouser with a little you know mesh shoe thing go and get them and i've got them in extra small so what we're gonna do guys is next week we're gonna talk about all things baby unless the baby comes over the weekend then we're fucked and we're not gonna talk about all but we are we're gonna talk about like glow up tips for after the baby we're gonna talk about c-sections natural birth what to pack in your hospital bag what do you really actually use and what you don't

tips of the day i mean i have started buying like my little bits and bats of glow up stuff because i just there's certain do you not think when you get to the end of your pregnancy you've not been able to do anything you feel so different the excitement on the supplements the botox the glow up that you get your books it's it's it's such a feeling like i'm gonna be me again i'm gonna order a case of ghost rosé to put in my wine wrap anyway guys we have yapped this week from hemorrhoids to i've forgotten my head meniscuses right we love you all so so much don't worry lauren's gonna be holding the fort like we said next week is me holding fort a little bit of a baby episode but we're on the bonus we're on the bonus just general chat like all your dilemmas all that kind of good

shit leave us a review don't forget to subscribe and please guys share when you are listening yeah we love it this week we did two pilates classes we did and i did two giveaways on patreon you did two giveaways all that fun is on patreon it really is the best closest yeah it's amazing community so we did two pilates classes at studio 34 and the girlies went and enjoyed that there's all kinds of chit chat going on there so head over to our instagram page at knit up pod if you tap on the link through there all of the links to everything are on there see you later bye