Nip Tuck - Lauren's Birth Story

Episode Date: July 1, 2025

Lauren is officially back on the podcast - and we have baby Tommy in the studio with us.Lauren goes through her full birth story with us - and remember guys WE ARE NOT DOCTORS - so please always seek your own medical advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

guys she is back i'm back bitches she looks amazing the baby's here with us so you might hear a few so tell us about the birth okay hello guys i've missed you um it's really weird because we've just been saying like i left the studio with a big belly and i've just come back in with a baby like what the fuck how are they even in there what is that what is life like i just look at him and think how james keeps going you've made a bone in your body weird your belly has made a bone what weird how incredible women are incredible so shall i do my birth shall i tell you because i haven't kind of gone into detail yet about the birth and i think tell us everything babe so a lot of people that are thinking of sections that have had sections kind of wonder

how it all goes so i shall tell you the story sit down get a cup of tea a wine a wine if you're not interested in babies fast forward so the section day we had booked about two weeks before um and it was really weird like the morning off i didn't sleep the night before i don't know how anybody ever can sleep knowing that the next morning they're getting up and a baby's coming out of them i don't know how anyone would sleep i did not sleep three o'clock four o'clock so every hour james whole night um so we literally got up we were the admission time was seven in the morning so we were like the first ones and we went i did do a little video for you for the patreon girls of the day um and basically we just sat around for quite a while and we were in like a little bay

and they would you know what i went to burnley hospital and i have to say they were fantastic the anaesthetist came around introduced himself it was very calm very chilled and we were just sat there i was in a gown and we were like right so and then we got taken down to outside of the theater um and we just sat outside there for 10 minutes and literally the theater doors were next to us and we could hear a baby cry from the one before so we were like sat there with this big bump looking down at it like it's coming out in a minute and we heard this yeah because they say from when you go in and sit down on the table the baby will be born like 10 minutes 10 minutes it's it's just what i have to say is having experienced labor and then a section was it totally different

totally different um i would say in a way it was more of a mental fuck than going into labor is because when you go into labor all of a sudden it's systems go you're in fucking pain it's it's very you don't have time to think that a baby's coming because all you're thinking is this is fucking awful this hurts what the fuck and it's very like check her where's she up to it's very dramatic so you don't have time to think about it whereas with a section you are sat there yeah like your mind your mind is thinking i'm having a baby in a minute 10 minutes i'm having a baby and in 10 minutes they're gonna cut me open and that's quite scary as well like in 10 minutes it's like which james amazing just just tell us i'll just go i'll just go i'll just rant

so sorry if we need to fast forward but i'll get it all out so we were waiting outside this room um and we could hear this other baby crying and we're looking at each other and we're like fuck like our baby's coming any minute now um i was texting my friends like waiting waiting um and james took over my phone and there was there's midwives in there so with regards to pictures i believe they're not allowed to take videos um obviously it's a surgical procedure there's probably legalities around it and maybe the surgeons don't want that and i get that but what i did that was quite clever is i put the pictures on live mode so every picture that the midwife took and i just said to her keep taking them keep taking them everything you can every

picture she took i could then watch a few seconds on live video live photos it felt like a video and if she took loads in a row it almost made a little video sorry he's crying um so we went in and that's when the nerves hit me and i started feeling like a bit weird i took my own little bluetooth stereo in sometimes they have them but i took my own and i'd made a playlist of just like chilled songs our favorite songs our wedding songs that kind of thing um sorry he's crying this is going to happen throughout the episode i won't be bringing him again the weird thing is he's not cried he's just slept for the whole month and now today he's awake um christina's got him she's bobbing him around very well so yeah we go in and i sit on the bed and i'm like bent over

and that's when i thought this is actually quite scary it was very calm but it was just a weird feeling there was so many people in the room so many people there to get this baby out which was amazing and that's one of the reasons i chose a section it's so calm it's so planned there's no variables really you know with natural birth you worry are they gonna is the heart rate gonna drop are they gonna have the cord are they gonna poo and eat their own poo all this stuff there wasn't any of that it was so controlled and everyone was there to do their job there must have been six people seven people in the room did it hurt like getting the no no no so i had the spinal um they put some local in first which was a bit of a sting kind of botoxy and then it was numbed there's a

bit of pressure at the bottom of my spine but honestly i wasn't i wasn't in any pain at all it was more just weird and i was just looking at james and he was looking at me and we were like it was just it was fine but it was odd it was an odd feeling absolutely like my brain was a bit like i don't think i could catch up with what was going on quick enough so it was a bit of a shock like when you're in labor you have hours i was 14 hours with fear and by the time they come out you give no fucks you just want it out it's so different you have time to think and it's it's very daunting to know it's coming um and you're not on any like painkillers which kind of make you a bit woo woo you're just very much fully compos mentis which is weird yeah like you said the thing about knowing

it's coming in 10 minutes is weird knowing they're going to cut you open is weird whereas normally you're in labor and you're in agony and you don't give a shit yeah i think i that would scare me i get why people it wasn't scary it was very calm but it was mentally quite hard to get your head around what's it feel like when they pull him out so they laid me down and james was sat like near my head and we'd already said we wanted the screen thing down so you can have it up or down if it's up you can just see like a blue screen if it's down i was flat on my back so i couldn't really see but James could see everything which is what we wanted he's not squeamish he wanted to look and I wanted him to look um and then I started feeling a little bit dizzy and

they gave me the meds to numb me and they were like right can you feel this can you feel that and they spray a water on you cold water to see if you can feel it and I couldn't I was like no I'm numb I'm numb and then I started feeling a little bit sick and a little bit dizzy so and I was a bit like oh this is a lot and I just said to the guy I feel a bit dizzy and he was like it's your blood pressure not a problem we'll put something else in your drip we'll sort that out now but it was quite good feeling dizzy because it kind of took away that it's quite good to not be in the room completely and then she was the the surgeon was fantastic she was like right we're going to begin um you're not going to feel anything you're going to feel some pressure

your baby's going to be with you less than 10 minutes maybe seven minutes and i was just lying there and we had this music on and it was playing like our favorite people which is like oh my god some people would absolutely hate it it's like a smooth fm we had like lighthouse family we had james arthur who's our absolute favorite in the world we had like babylon by david like that's my kind of music a bit cringe so we had that on um and james was kind of like sweating a bit and he was just stroking my head and i was like what's going on he's like they started now they've started and i was like just stroking my head then i started feeling quite a lot of pressure and then there was like a pop and they were like right your waters we've broken your waters we're

nearly in there now um and i was just lying there and then i started feeling the tugging and the tugging is the weirdest feeling ever it's like a dishwasher in your tummy um and i could feel like getting pulled around a bit and james's eyes were so wide open he was watching it he was like oh my god lauren oh my god then sorry guys i've now we have to stop for a second i've now got tommy on my chest so if there's any gurgling noises i do apologize like i say he's not made a noise for a month and then today he's woken up so yeah we had the music on and james was just like stroking my face and he's like it's fine it's fine and then i could feel a lot of tugging like no pain whatsoever just tugging and then the weirdest thing is because i was i made this playlist and

obviously i didn't know at what point in the playlist he was going to be born and i was quite excited that i was like what song is it going to be and it was james arthur heartbeat you're obsessed with james i'm obsessed i know his girlfriend actually fiance um randomly randomly got introduced and realized then that she was uh james arthur's partner and she's absolutely lovely i'm obsessed with him i'm obsessed with his music james's he was our wedding songs and that's the song that came on that heartbeat and it's such a like it's about his child it's like about his child it was really random that it came on so then i started getting a bit emotional and i was like a little bit teary james was a little bit teary and then he must have pulled his head

out and he was like oh my god lauren he's got loads of hair and it's the weirdest thing because you're just lying there you can't move you're looking at the ceiling you are flat you've not got any inks you can't even look over you are flat looking at the ceiling you don't know what's going on did you know the sex i had an idea of the sex i'm gonna say no more yeah well there was a time when how do i say it it wasn't on purpose i've had an inkling of the sex yeah um but not through a scan potentially yeah on purpose um uh i had an there was yeah i had an idea so um then they pulled his head out and james was like he's got so much hair and i was like has he has he and i couldn't see anything and then they pull then they were like pulling so much that my body came off the bed

my body came james was like i was looking thinking what the fuck he said and i was watching and they were they weren't doing anything wrong this is what they have to do and they were pulling him out that much and james was like i was looking at his skin thinking how is her skin not ripping how is it not ripping um and they were put and my body came off the bed i can't believe james watched all of that was it a lady or a man a lady and she was actually um because what they told me is that normally with the nhs with planned sections you have a not a junior i don't want i'm not going to say the word right but someone that isn't as experienced because they're so easy and so straightforward but i actually end up with a consultant like someone high up which was you

know i'm sure they were the same but it was nice she was absolutely lovely and she was like he's got a load of hair anyway then they start proper tugging and she was like oh my god he's massive and they were like we were pulling him out she was like you're gonna feel some real tugging now because he's much bigger than we anticipated you you didn't look like they were going where have you been hiding this and it was like almost like they kept pulling he still wasn't done he's got really long legs and then they pulled him up pulled him out and james was crying and i he was like crying um and then they like held him up in the air and then he lying king and he pissed right straight away so he was like weeing in the air and they were like there he is and they were going

he's gorgeous obviously and then they were like he definitely couldn't be a girl he's a boy he's got such a boy's face and then they like put him up in the air and i was like laughing smiling crying i was like happy crying um but i must admit it was a really surreal feeling and it was a very i don't know when i had fear i don't know the difference i don't know what but i was i don't know if it's because i was in labor first but i felt more of an immediate rush of like love whereas with this one um with this one i felt it was a bit of a longer thing for the connection it was like i was still really in shock like they held him up and i was like that's my baby that's my child with fear i don't know what the difference is but it it just took me a

bit longer and i was literally looking at him and it was shock i was like that's my boy that's my baby do you think it's because it was your second as well and because of the circumstances because you it was quick and you knew you were having him and you were a little bit nervous i'd say the last we saw you two days before you gave birth and i'd say you were like i was really i was really anxious about it and i don't know i don't know what the difference was but i i just i loved it i don't know i can't explain it i was just really a bit shocked by the whole experience which i think it's quite common some people say you have them and you instantly some people like i was in a bit of shock yeah i think i would say i was in a bit of shock and what i also did i didn't i don't

know why i did this i think it was just because i wanted him checked out first so one thing that they said to me is do you want him putting straight on your chest immediately or do you want him taken away and checking first i think fear went straight on my chest but i said check him first and it was only because i just wanted to check he was okay but that took a bit too long and they weigh them don't they and wrap them in and i didn't quite realize that so if i was to do it again which i'm not then i would have said on the chest immediately because they kind of took him away checked him over and i was like lying there couldn't move my head looking at the ceiling is he okay and you feel a bit off your head i felt a bit weird and a bit like oh and then james was

holding him which i did want i wanted him to if you can hear a smacking guys i'm just tapping his bum that's what he likes um i could see james holding him and james i was like what's he look like what's he and i don't know it was just weird and then they gave him me and that was absolutely lovely um and then they took me into like a recovery room i would say it took 15 20 minutes to then sew me up um and then i went into like a recovery room and i was that's quite a long time yeah um i was a bit woo woo in that room i was lying there and i was like huh did you lose a lot of blood i lost more than 500 something so i had to have the warfarin injections apparently so if you lose over 500 still doing them at home i did them for 10 days and by the way actually you really

do have to take them apparently they're really important so make sure you do um and then they took me to the ward i was talking to james last night about this it's the funniest thing so you give birth right and then you put on this trolley you cannot feel your legs at some point i believe they put something up my arse um which yes they do a pain killer yeah i was because it's like a slow release pessary so then they go like so we're just gonna pop something up your bum now well the weird thing is i knew they were gonna feel it i knew they were gonna because they did it with fear and after they'd done it with there i was like i didn't know you'd done that and they didn't tell me again but i know at some point they did so i don't know when they slipped it off i

must be loose because i didn't and they must just very slow lip it up and then the other funny thing is when they're shifting you from bed to bed you feel like one of those american overweight people do you know that the those tv programs where where they go and they have to get them out too stuck in your house and they had to put them on the thing and they have to like slide them onto the bed that's what i felt like i was just lying there yeah and they went like slid me onto the next bed one two three up and i'm slid across i was just like and then the man like is pushing you into walls yeah yeah on the way back to your room yeah and the weird thing is so then next thing you're on this bed and you're still a bit like huh yeah and you've got this baby in your arms

and they're pulling you backwards yeah so you're not even going forward you're going backwards and you're like you've got and then you go in a lift you go in a lift and you're in this lift in the in the normal hospital at this point so people are going coming past you going congratulations as they go past you and you're just they're like and you can't move anything you've got this baby on your chest and you've got this smile on this fake smile like and you like and you can't and you're just holding this baby that you don't really know yet and you're just like and everyone's going congratulations you go thank you and they're pulling you backwards not forwards so you don't know where you're going you're banging into the corridor and you're just like the fuck has just

happened then they took me into this they have that weird adrenaline weird adrenaline thing and then by the evening the adrenaline's gone and you have a crash yeah so then we get put in this like side room amazing lucky girl not side room that's a lie sorry ward we did go in a side room i'm on this ward and it's and then everything was oh normal again it was just and james like i'm starving i was like we'll go and get some lunch and then i was there like right then with this baby and he'd gone to get lunch and it was all finished and it was it was weird um what i did do though i did stem cell banking which company did you use it was future health biobank right so i've spoken about a bit on my stories but stem cell banking is something that you did it did

you i've done it twice yes so and another friend of mine did it i didn't know much about it but it's basically there is so much stem cells and goodness in their umbilical cord and there's different ones there's blood and then you can do blood and you can do stem cells do you know what a stem cell is no it's a blank cell right so basically if it's very good if someone in the family had cancer so 25 match for siblings yes and it's a blank cell so it's it's like highly likely that it will be able to help do what it needs to do so basically what it is is they take the goodness out of the stem cell but the lady has to be there the yeah what's it called phlebotomist phlebotomist so about a week before we got um a chat made with this lady she was so nice she was

lovely she's like right guys this is my number if you go into labor you text me i've got the whole day free for you do not worry let update me when you get to the hospital it was dead easy i just sent her a quick text going in at 11 she was there for 10 i filled out some forms she she was chatting to the hospital they did it all it didn't affect me in any way shape or form she had like there's like they have these like little rooms that she was in um and when he was born the they already knew when you've cut the cord you take it to this lady she did what she needed to do i didn't even notice i didn't notice any of it yeah and then she put it in a box that we yeah the clear box yeah we've been given a box to go to the hospital with she put it in there gave it the

midwife and when i was back in my room the midwife came with a box and said it's done i didn't see her again really it was so straightforward she was lovely and then there's a number that you text james texted the number on the box saying we're ready someone came and met him at the at the entrance with the box gone then what they do is they take it and they will um store it for you so god forbid anything would to happen where your baby needed stem cells there's lots of cancers there's 80 different things it can treat blood cancers that type of thing and they will store it and if in future you i don't know about you actually the kids the baby needs it it's stored there and they also can do clinical trials with it if you allow them which i said yeah because i

was like you can use it for certain things if we don't use it yeah we don't use it yeah yeah absolutely i kind of wanted to like can i micro needle it into my face so yeah i wanted them to