Nip Tuck - Petrol, Poo & Pensioners

Episode Date: September 30, 2026

Ashley’s arguing with pensioners in Knutsford, James has put petrol in a diesel car with FOUR kids in tow, and we need to talk about the Hyrox poo situation. The girls also get into the latest drama surrounding the infamous “facelift lady”, Ashley reveals the nightmare of having her Instagram repeatedly taken down (and why you should NEVER pay a hacker to get it back), plus there’s Gemma Collins, Alo Yoga controversy and a savage dilemma involving a ghosted girl who messaged his MUM. And, of course, What We Bought This Week and a brand-new, very eligible Man of the Week…Head over to our socials @niptuckpod and click the link in our bio to find our YouTube, where full video episodes will be released every Wednesday at 5pm. If you're a Patreon member, not only will you get the Wednesday main episode the day before at 5pm, you'll now be able to watch the Friday Bonus too!Get in touch with your questions, dilemmas and Slutty Sue's via our Whatsapp or email [e-mail] sure to subscribe, follow, rate and review!

Hey guys, welcome to Niptuk. Not giving a fuck. Not giving a fuck. So, this is the podcast that celebrates being positive. Aspirational. We haven't done that phrase. How many Moscow mules have we had? Two.

Non-mate. We've had spicy margreens. Oh, I've had too many then. Okay, then I like a spicy mug. Right, guys, what we've got coming up this week. We're going to talk a lot. little bit very quickly about the high rocks poo story because there has been a development now we're going to talk about it the sydney swiney ad we need to chat about that and we're

going to talk about remember the blef lady she's still going and she's back in the press right let's begin first of all ashley where can they find us now as always we are releasing our main episode every single wednesday plus our exclusive bonus on patreon on a friday however you can now watch with your own eyes. Full episodes of me and Lauren. You can see all the side eyes, all the knitted, the little things that you don't hear. Head over to YouTube where everyone can watch on Wednesday episode.

Or if you really want to be in with the gang, then you sign up to Patreon. And that basically means you're our best friend. Yeah, you're in the gang then. Because you have a direct access to us. You can DM us. chat to the other nip-tuk girlies, you'll get discount codes,

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Exactly. Right. First of all, I believe an old lady got angry with you, love. Oh, yeah. So basically, I was walking down Nutsford High Street. Is Nutsford got a high street? Yeah, it definitely does. What do you call it? It's got top and bottom street, Lucas.

All else. Which one do you think I'm driving down? No, that's what they're actually called. Top and Bottom Street. Lucas is a top street, I think. Right, anyway. God, I'm so impressed with myself that I know all the gay language, I just can't get over it.

Right, so whenever I go to Nutsford High Street, which is very rare, I wouldn't, it doesn't feel like a high street. It feels very like a cobbly confusion. The historic town of Nutsford. It's cobbly and confusing, I find. Yeah. It's very, ugh. Yeah, like, you wouldn't be good with a pram. No.

Thank goodness I don't push a pram. Exactly. I bet you bike down that road, though, don't you? What are you going to admit? I've never pushed the baby in a pram yet and she's three months old. You have. Have you not? No.

I was going to say it's been winter, but it hasn't. I'm wearing the carrier thing. You're not a walk of the while, are you anyway? I don't really use my legs much. No, no. We said that before. Oh, we would just seen. No, I ran on the podcast.

Right. Anyway, back to this. Do you know Victoria Beckham never was seen with a buggy? Well, then that's fine. She always carried the babies, but she always wore really high heels and she used to get really slacked off for it. I'd say that's rather dangerous,

but I mean, it's not my kid, so fall off. So on you. Do you know what I mean? I mean, they're all turned out. All the kids are fine. Brooklyn, we're not sure what happened there, are we? Anyway, go on, right. We digress.

Sorry, he's just not that sound, is he though? Like, he's not that sound. Well, is he that? We don't know. We don't know. From that story of the podcast. He's the fittest one. No, he's not.

Cruise is the fittest. Are you all right? Cruise, no, Romeo. Sorry, not, Cruz's about. 10. Don't quote all that. Romeo is at that there's something in there. There is some... No.

No, no, no, no. I think your personality is overjudged. He wears those clothes. Like, not for you. Like high-waisted pants. Like a Harry Styles-esque. Yeah. Some people are into that though. His wife obviously is. Can you imagine like, sorry hon, I'm just going to take my collots down and remove my boots. I'd be like, oh. I'm just going to take my penis out of my collots.

Like, ew! Right. Right, back to the story. So, I was walking down the road and I was voice noting. I think you or someone and this old lady literally was coming towards me

and she went like this. You need to be watching YouTube to see this. And I was like... What? And she was like... What? With a hand?

Yeah, like as if like, get off your phone. And you were just minding your own... Like... I'm an old... Well, but I'm not... not like... And what was she annoyed you are? Like as if you're not allowed on the

historic cobbles of Nutsford with a mobile telephone. Maybe you don't realise but maybe because you were walking and talking you did... I'm very aware of my surroundings. I wonder what a problem was. Am I not one of the most polite people

when it comes to like manners of like hello holding a door open? Yeah but no I just thought maybe like he went in a way by mistake because I can't... Why would she do that? That's what people in Cheshire are like. Are they? Yeah.

I think sometimes older people just want the reason. But then when you go back on them and you're like, you what? And they think, oh. And then they think I shouldn't. Oh, shit I messed with the wrong one. They don't want the argument. About, I think it was about a year ago I had a bad bust up with the lady in Sainsbury's Archingham Carpark.

Yeah, you did. But sometimes they need telling. I give it. I don't forget, I'm from Withinshaw. Like, no, no, no. What happened? Oh, she just, I was like reversing into a parent and child space, but there was a lady doing something that she couldn't see and she was going,

move your big stupid car. And I just, I had the kids in the car as well and I went, slow down. Yeah, just calm down. And then she was going like, move. And I just stopped the car and I went, move when you get out and come and speak to me over here. And she couldn't cope with it and she got really, This is the problem and I think this is what I have learned and listen I'm not agreeing with confrontation

however if somebody gives it the blah blah I tend to then think no no no we're not just going to have a shouting match in the car I'm going to get out now and then they kind of a bit like oh and they recoil and I just think well you shouldn't have started it then because you don't know I'm from I'm from Rojdale but you don't know what I had one name the other day

where somebody was giving me a bit. And do you not think the kids encourage it though in the car because they love the fucking drama, don't they? The apps, oh, well, mind you anyway. They absolutely love the drama. And then when they get home, they're like, Daddy, Mom, I had a fight with someone. Yeah, yeah.

Right, so High Rocks, let's talk about this. So we're a little bit behind because you know we record sometimes a bit behind. Ashley didn't want to talk about this because she said it was boring. Boring. I just think High Rocks is such a co-th thing to do as well. Like, you're already, in my opinion,

a co- if you're doing High Rock. A bit of a cult It's a cult No I would not It's fine You're severely narcissistic To do high rocks

Do you know I just think it's like It is like everybody Come and watch me on your weekend And cheer me on And then I'm gonna take a picture on the stage To my time And everyone recording me on social media

This is going to turn into the breastfeeding issue Which we're going to talk about later by the way Be careful Be careful Do you not think he's people It's my own back Do you not think, though, that it's like people that just... I mean, I get what you're saying, and it's not for me.

But also, maybe they just want to do fitness and they found some mates that'll do it with them. I guess just go for a run then? I don't know. Anyway, she shouted at. You pay to enter it. You have to go to different cities. It's like a big effort.

So say, like, blah blah is doing high rocks in Brazil next week. And we're all flying out to watch them. and hey. And then it's like they lay their outfit out on the bed the night before. And they all... It's quite deep. They wear like stickers and yeah.

I mean, some people are into it, but the point here is... I'm only jealous because I can't walk more than three steps. She was out of breath in the park earlier, so she's just jealous, ignore her. Right, so the lady shatterself. Now, you didn't think it was shit. Someone said, basically,

they were allowed these rehydration gels. Alex is what? No, it is a shit. It is a shit. She did shit herself. But someone did say that they thought at first it was a jow. So basically, you will know, but if you're not on social media, which some of you are on, basically there was a really big, like, high rocks thing to the point of, like, the winner of the world high rocks, I don't know.

And as she was doing it, she shot herself. She still won, though, you know. Is she not come second? Yeah, no, she got disqualified. Let me get to it. So she pooed, and the poo was literally down her legs. It was like dry as well. It was all dribbling down her legs.

and she didn't stop, she continued to the next round. Obviously, there was gym equipment there, there was other people working there, and the poo, like, there's millions of pictures, and the poo is just all down the back of her legs. Anyway, she went on to win. So there was this big uproar about, first of all, number one, if you are in a, and I guess this is kind of out,

this is, it's the staff's fault. No, but this is actually almost agreeing with what you've just said. So she thought that the high rocks was that important, that the fact that she had soiled herself didn't matter because she had to fucking win. And I think a lot of the argument was she'd clearly pooped her pants, she knew, but she wanted to win that badly

that it didn't matter. However, a part of me kind of, I appreciate the hustle. She pooed, it'd already been done, the poo had happened, everyone had seen it, at least win rather than be, you could be a poo winner than a poo loser. Loads of athletes have done this in like marathes.

Yeah, like Paula Radcliffe shut herself. that's in my brain Did she? It's different for high rock so Gary Lineker shot himself What? Yeah like footballers marathon runners

Right so then this is where it gets And then this is another thing right If she'd had a period leak I don't think everyone would be going as mad about this No they wouldn't even Women's rights It wouldn't be a thing in it It'd be like good for her

She was on a period We must not say a word Because a period But a bit of period It's still a bodily It's still a bodily thing That you may have not had any control over and it's a bodily fluid.

So all I'm saying is just remember that society, if it was a period, everyone would be clapping her and doing videos like, this is a real woman, period is fine. But who's not? Do you get what I'm saying? I feel like social media just chooses. I don't agree with it. I think that the staff should have intervened. Health and safety, surely, for the other people.

But I think that they didn't know, like what to do. Oh, they did. No, like what to do in that situation. Because if you took someone off. Are you then going to get in trouble? Yeah. Like, do you know what I mean? Yeah.

I just chat. Do you think she had a Frappuccino? Well, it happens to the best of us. Yeah, like, I am not against, like, it can happen. And if you're exerting yourself, so she'd been disqualified, did you say, Alex? Yeah, she got disqualified after the event. Because, I mean, the...

Was it like a rule? They had to rip up the whole mats, like, clean all the equipment, like, everything. It's not like a marathon where you're not having to pick anything up or touch anything. She's actually having to touch equipment and then put it down for someone else to then use it next.

So like a marathon, you just run. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that it's just... So you're impacting people. It's gone everywhere. Was there any videos of like other people are around than using her machine? Like, I'd say they deserve like a medal for carrying on

when someone had pooed. Never mind her. She, when I saw an interview with her, she wasn't asked, was she? She was not asked. She's done, she did a tweet and then deleted her. She put an Instagram on it. It was like apologising for everything that's happened. And then got disqualified.

But listen. It's not a big fucking deal. It is. If you're that much of a knob to go to do a high rocks, then I don't give a fuck. You deserve to be pooed on. You also don't need to be there or be doing it. Okay.

Just like the lady that shot herself. Like, do you know what I mean? Like no one's forcing you to do the high rocks, whether or not it's got shit on it. But imagine you were there and then she ruined your whole thing by pooping. She should have just got off. She should have been like, oh dear, this is awful and got off. Like, she shouldn't have carried it.

on with poo down her legs, I don't think. But any other opinions are always welcome, girls. If you've seen a different angle to this that we've missed, do let us know. And if you sound, but you still do high rocks, then sorry. Then she's sorry. She's really sorry she said that. Right. Don't make me say this.

Don't make me be the one that says this word. The Sydney-Sweeney advert. So basically, it's this really sexual marketing powerhouse. of an advert for a gambling prediction site. Right. And it's just her like basically naked while sport is on playing. Right.

And I don't see anything wrong with it. Do you? Not really, no. No. It's got people talking. It's got everyone talking. She actually owns shares in the business. She's not being fucking like...

She chose to do it. She wanted to do it. Exploited. Yeah, she's benefiting for it. If I had a body like that, I'd probably be doing that as well. Well, you did your cosmetic console. No, you could. Yeah.

Because, you know what I mean? It's your business. If she wants to do it, I don't think it's that big a deal. I don't know. Maybe we're looking at it from slightly wrong. I don't see it being that big a deal. I think... A lot of people are enraged about it.

If she's okay with it, then I think we're... Absolutely. I think she's going to be okay. Then I think we're. However, her boyfriend is scooter brawns. That does make me question her slightly. Oh, really? I wonder what he thought of it. Would Ed mind you do something like that?

No. No, I don't think James would, in the slightest. I don't think you'd be asked one bit. We've missed a chunk of what we've been up to and what we did this weekend. Okay, so... I've just realised, sorry guys, we've missed a big bloody chunk about where we're up to

and what we did. You went to a kid's party. Two kids parties. Did you double drop? No, one was on Friday, one was on Sunday. Were they fun ones though? Yeah. With other moms that were all right.

Yeah. When it's like that, it's not too bad. I've not got any school mum friends really. No. I just have a couple. Yeah, but they were already my friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Does that make sense?

Because, like, me and Lauren have had this discussion before. and I think it was when Thea started getting invited to kids' parties and I was like, I don't take mine, I just don't. Yeah, just can't be honest. No, it's too much. Yeah, it is a lot. And obviously, I only have Saskia every other weekend. So I want to do what I want to do.

Like, yeah, I get that. Like, when you've got them, you don't want to be at a party when you could be doing something else with them. And a lot of them, I don't mean to be a twat, but they're really shit. Yeah. So it's not like, you could do more, you're thinking, Like, you could do more fun things with that. No, like, shit in my opinion.

Yeah. Like, the kids probably absolutely love it and that's what a kids party is for. Yeah, right, get you, go, get you. But, you know, I'm a huge, like, narcissist. So you want to enjoy it as well. Exactly. I did not enjoy my weekend.

So I had two kids party years and then, what did I do? On Saturday, me and Ed went for some food together. Oh, where did you go? The stolen lamb in the historic town of Nutsford. The stolen lamb. Greek. Well, I don't feel like that's a very Greek name.

That sounds to me like a pub. Yeah, it is because of the Greek lamb thing. Lamb, cofter and stuff. Lamb, yeah. And all the food is lamb, basically. Would it not be called just something like a Greek word? I feel like the stolen lamb sounds like a pub to me. It's really nice.

What did you eat? Had like this stew thing and then some rice and then some halumi. It was lovely. And you enjoyed. Yeah. And just honestly, at the weekend now, I just chill. I think I prefer doing that, especially when it gets to winter,

just having like a full on. Nothing planned. Well, we had pure fucking drama because James put, wait, let me get this right, he put petrol in his diesel van. That's really bad at that. Yeah.

How did he manage that? To be fair to him, our brains are up here at the minute. Like all the kids, all the two in and throwing, all the drama, the house. Was it a new van? No, I've had it for a long time.

So basically in the morning he was like, right, I need to go and do some bits. I'm going to take the kids with me because I needed to tidy up and clean up and do loads of shit at home. So he was like, right, I'm going to take the majority of them. I think one might have been in bed. I'm going to take them for hot chocolate.

We're going to go and buy some door frames and do some jobs. Yeah, that's all we do. Mate, our weekends are so horrible. This weekend was fucking shit. Anyway, so he's like, I'm going to go and do that. I'll take the kids. And then we'll go to B&M and I'll let them

a shit ton of crap. So they were doing that and I was clearing up. So I was like just boring, tidying up, cleaning up fucking all I do all day. And I get this phone call and he was like, hi yeah. So I've put petrol in my diesel van.

When did he realise as he was doing it? No, like five minutes down the road when he broke down. Well isn't that like you meant to like, if girls, this is a tip, Ed told me this. All right. If you do put the wrong fuel in your car, like vice versa, don't start the engine.

Yeah, because then it starts circulating. Because then it gets in everything. So he said to me, you need to, because I did it once. It needs to be taken out straight away. Yeah, like you stay there until someone, like, comes and does it. Well, he said that he was driving down the road

with four kids in the car and all of a sudden the car started, like, losing, and then it just clicked. You need a whole new engine? No, it wasn't that. So he rang me and he was just like, yeah, I've put, I was literally, I honestly should have seen the state of me. Because of my baby hairs at the minute,

they were like sticking out frizzy. I had my glasses on, I had yesterday's outfit on that I'd slept it. Honestly, it's horrific at the minute. And I honest, I look really, not just a, I looked really bad. I had all stains down me. And I was clearing up and cleaning. He was just like, no, I mean really, probably the worst of,

sometimes at the moment I look that bad that I cried the other day right. So I cried the... Have you got no mirrors in the house? No. So I cried the other day, right? I think it was... My house is covered in the things.

I think it was Sunday. And James was like, you're all right? Anyway, I started crying. And one of the things on my list... One of the things in my list for crying about was, um, the state that I leave the house in nowadays.

It shows that something's wrong. That is literally what I said. Because I don't care anymore. And he left the house looking like this. And he just rang me. He's like, yeah, I've put... And I just went... Okay, no worries I'll be there in a minute.

You know, when you get to the point where the chaos is that horrific that I just, I didn't even have a go at him because it could. I just went, yeah, all right, no worries, I'll be there in a minute. Off I trunched in my glasses. Went and picked him up. Put you in your charmers? They were the treats, but it did look like jammas. Let's not admit they were treats.

We wouldn't want to tarnish the brand. And they were so stained, they were so stained. So I went and got him. But when you've got a baby, everything gets like marked. It's just got bits of. all over it. So I got in the car, drove down the road and there they were in the, and it was pouring down and I mean pouring down on this particular day. The house is like a mud fort. I can't use my front door anymore. Gone. Can't walk out the front door anymore. There's

nothing to step on to except a mud hut. She'd have to go out the back door. This must do something to your mental health. Oh, it's not good. Megan, when she came round, she was like, I don't know how, she was like, you're a true, I'd, wow. She was like, wow, how are you doing this? I was like, I'm not doing well. Have you got there? Long time. So went and got him, went down the road and I saw this van, white van, pulled over, four kids in it, hazards on. I thought, there's my husband. Was Tommy Bruce in there? Tommy Bruce was fine. He was singing and playing. So then they all got in my car and the day continued. But basically, no, he rang somebody and someone came out and fixed it

within about an hour. It wasn't as big a deal. How much did it cost? I didn't ask because then I would have been annoyed. Yeah. I didn't ask. But yeah, so that happened. What else happened? Theo was throwing up on Sunday morning. I woke up to the sound of my child vomiting next me. Yeah, and really just a joyful weekend, like really positive. I've got a lot of positivity in me right now. So the Gemma Collins documentary, we need to talk about that as well. Yes. So I've only just started watching it, but do you know what? Like Gemma Collins, she's an enigma. And have you met her before? Never. We have. She was at that event. We met her together. With that Steph did years ago. Bior.

repeal event. Yeah. And, oh, back then I thought that would, like, I was like, Joel is his own way there as well. No, Gemma Collins is one of the most famous people. I don't think I spoke to her. I did. Because do you remember I was getting my hair curled?

And then she was like, oh, after you finish having your hair curled, I won't mind on. Okay. And I was like, yeah, okay, I don't know. But she was lovely to me. I don't really remember. But. Is she that famous? Are you joking?

It's Gemma Collins, like, a surgeon that I know. she went to do some filming with him. He said they had to close the whole road because people were mobbing her that bad. Really? Yes. Have you seen the clip? What's it?

What's up? Where she had a row with someone. She's like, you're right. And he goes, not really. He's like, what's up? You will. She's fucking hilarious. No, to be fair.

She's a gay icon, isn't she? Yeah. She's a gay icon. Like the memes and stuff. Her memes go back. Yeah. Me? Did you see fucking.

Cheryl Cole and Kelly Roll and in the gay village on last Tuesday night. At Via? They just turned up. They must have been doing something. And they were singing with all the gays in the club. Yeah.

First of all, how are they even friends? I don't click any links. How are they even friends? They must be filming like X Factor or something. And they were at the gay village. Last Tuesday. Yeah. Cheryl calls a vibe.

So yeah, Gemma Collins. I knew she was famous, but I didn't think she was, I didn't know she was that. Famous. So tell me about a documentary because I have not watched it, but I will. So, listen, we're all in the girlie's group chat here, even though thousands of people listen to this.

Probably will judge me, but I'm going to give you what I thought. Well, you might as well carry on as you have been. I'm just unsure of her partner for her. What's he called? Remy. Rami. Is he still with that one? And she's such a good stepmom to the little boy.

I just don't know but then they have been together for such a long time and she is like me she's probably a very difficult partner to deal with you know what I mean but based on public like what I've seen

I can imagine she would not be an easy partner exactly so maybe they were made for each other ramming that's split up didn't they and then they got back together again and do you know the story of like how they met and everything tell where did they

me like on a train was it or something? Oh like totally random? I think I've listened to her book. I used to listen to her podcast. Right. It got stopped though. She's really into psychic medium stuff. Right.

But I'm only into the first episode and her mum's not very well. And a mum used to be such a character and it's so sad seeing a mum like a shell of herself in a home. It's really sad. I like Gemma. I don't feel like I know enough about her. I think you'd like her. Do you think? I don't really have an opinion.

ever thought. Yeah, I like that. I do. I'll always remember the candy line. What was it? Something about this candy. If you don't want this candy. Yeah, to be fair.

She's quite like on. He messed her around. He did. He broke a heart, didn't he? Right, guys, we're going to go for a break, and then we are coming back. With more shitty chat. With more shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty bottoms.

Right, guys, we are back. Right, this one is a good one. So, we need to talk about this. The BLEF lady. As you know, brought her to everyone's attention and we started this thing. I'm sorry I'm taking that. We did. We did. Then we went viral with that. And then everyone was like, yeah, well, whatever I got mind on it's 600 quid, but they were all saying that kind of thing. People were kind of almost

slagging us off because they were saying, well, some people can't afford it. Mine were great, mine were great. Then there was the girls. I've seen some that are great. Yeah. But then there was the girls doing the TikToks that were like taking the pace up and like rage baiting. rage baiting. Anyway, anyway, she's in the shit big time now. She's back.

But there's nothing they can do. She's big time in the shit now. I read this article at the weekend that Daily Mail had done and an under cover... I think it was higher brow than Daily Mail. It was Daily Mail. Was it?

Yeah, okay. An undercover reporter went to get a procedure like last week and she's still operating in Manchester and what they say is we will text you the postcode tomorrow

so the night before they text the postcode bring £650 cash for your upper blefts and they say park your car here and we will walk out of the apartment to meet you and so

someone walks out to meet them to take them into a random other apartment to have the procedure and they saw loads of people coming out having just had the op. But the main thing that I was like more shocked about was there was a bit more information about people that have been disfigured by a year.

Like there were some pictures on there. There were people saying that they couldn't close their eyelids. Now listen, that might be two in 2000, but that's still too. It's still not good. Like it was frightening. You're not, you're not backed by any kind of like governing body to support you.

This is what they were saying. They were saying there's nothing. that anyone can do, but it seems like the horror stories really are coming through. Well, they're going to literally like maim themselves. They're saying, yeah, I'll lie here while you do that to me. The facelift one, I saw a picture and it was so bad. Well, she said, the facelift lady, it's all on this article. We'll pop it in Patreon.

A facelift lady said she spent ages doing my left side, and then when she moved on to my right side, She only spent about 20 minutes in comparison to like an hour and a half. And it was like... Do you think it's because she just pulled it so much to one? No, I think that they must have been like, your next person's here. Because we have been in situations like in clinic with that,

not procedures. It's just scary. Because they get really into stuff. They'll be like sat having a chat with someone for ages. Because how do you say to someone? Sorry, you've asked enough questions now, bye. Yeah, you can't really. We couldn't do that.

And that's why we would... run behind for hours. Yeah, because someone would be like, and another thing, and you'd be thinking, oh, hurry up. Yeah. But there's nothing you can do.

But she's actually, I saw a couple of bits that she's working with a clinic that have been quite open about chatting about it. The Real McCoy. Did you see that bit? No. So they'd made all of these chat GP surgery priceless.

And at the top, it looked like some kind of doctor's symbol. It put Miss Cindy, the real McCoy. Oh, God. Yeah, apparently. Apparently the clinic owner, not to go too much, it's in the article, but has been very brazen. Brazen about it. And I just think if you're in that industry, let's protect, let's not try and get a quick book. Let's fucking protect people.

Because if it goes tits up, no one's got any insurance. Well, I worked recently with the professional standards agency. And they've actually got a really, really useful tool. I'll pop the link to that on Patreon because it just means that you can see. search for like fully certified and insured providers on there because for me that would be an important thing. I think the insurance is quite important isn't it because if things go wrong and they can even with the most experience of injectors. You can. But who's going to help you if they're not insured like how are you going to who's going to pay for the surgery? Who's going to pay for you to go to? No one. You are. I don't know. I know we've spoken right before. I know someone recently who has come back from having surgery abroad and like no one will help.

Really? Yeah. When I got my boobs done in Turkey and came back, I had an infection and I have to say they were great, the nurses were really good. They were really helpful, they dressed it for me, like they were really, really good, but maybe they're just getting fucking sick of it now or maybe this was six years ago. I think from an insurance perspective, you were like, you. once another plastic surgeon touches you,

don't quote me on this, but from what I know from when I work doing it, so say I do your procedure and I'm in another country and you come back and you go to Lucas to fix it. As soon as Lucas has touched you, you're his patient. So not that we would advise that for anyone.

So yes, that is. Just be extra, extra careful girls. I know we're going on about it again, but we just have to be careful. Allo yoga This is fucking mental Alex, did you watch that video? Is it fully true?

It's fully true Right, tell us Did you watch it either? Go on Right, so basically from what I saw of it Allo Yoga And guys

Allegedly Also everyone's going in on them At the minute aren't they IMO Quality shite Customer Service horrendous I've never got anything from there I had the track suits when they first came out

because I think I was pregnant so it was a really good hiding thing oh my God awful bobbled then and me and a few of the girls on Patreon did you see we're chatting about it and I was like girls I'm not a complainer but this is a 300 quid

track suit like I've worn it three times also with a track suit I want to be able to throw it in the wash absolutely it's easy wear Like the treats and the maybe ones wash really well. Anyway, emailed them, you just don't get a response. Really? Yeah, they don't know. Why then?

Why are people so obsessed with it? I've never had anything from there. I don't think it's as cool to wear it as it once was. I think it's a bit more of a Liverpool thing as well now. Yeah, okay. I think a lot of the boys in Liverpool wear aloe. Yeah, it's huge in Liverpool. It's huge in Liverpool.

Allo's big in Liverpool, yeah. I wonder why. And Monterex? Yes. Don't start me on that. The day that Tommy wants to wear clothes like that. Teddy does. He only wears under armour.

I will pass him to James and I will say, I've done my bit, darling. That's yours. Because right now I can dress him how I want to dress him. No, Lauren, there's no escaping. The second that he says, I would love a polyester track suit. I will put time in a bow.

I will hand him to James. I'll say, job here is done, I'm going to go and have a little girl. I'm going to get pregnant again and I'm going to have a girl. Because those clothing, honestly, the boys, wherever we go, I know they like it, it's not, wherever we go, I just look at them and think, you look so fucking scruffy.

And it's not scruffy, it's new, it's fresh, it's not, and I just look at them and think, oh, the sports wear. And James wears it. They love it. They love it. They love it. So, Allo. Allo, allegedly, allegedly, there's all these TikToks flying around. Again, I'll post it in Patreon. I think I already have, but a lot of people,

people responded and also were like, I've seen other people say this. Something along the lines, and don't quote me, but they are removing people's Instagram posts and pages for them wearing their own clothes. So this particular girl. Under a copyright infringement. She was on TikTok.

She built a following. I think she said, it's 80,000. And she regularly goes into store and does aloe holes, which is what TikTok's for. It's what Instagram's for. She does the hole, she buys them. We do holes.

Yeah, she buys the item, she keeps the item, she does like... She was one of their top customers. Yeah, so she said that she'd even got like a VIP thing in the store because she spends that much money there. She wears it, she films it, she shares it. She wasn't a scouser washer. No. No, she wasn't.

But she in Manchester? She wasn't a scouser. Anyway, so she did her usual of getting ready, and she was actually doing a makeup tutorial, I think she said, and she had her aloe set on. And then she found later on that her TikTok had been removed. And when she looked into it... I thought it was Instagram.

No, it was TikTok. Was it? Yeah, so she'd made any TikTok. When she looked into it, they'd removed it because Allo had said that she shouldn't be filming in their stores doing a haul, even though she'd paid for it. She shouldn't be wearing their items,

yeah, on a video without getting permission and copyright. But you're promoting that brand for free? It's not as if she's saying anything do rogettree. Because if that's the case, then why isn't Zara? Listen, Instagram and social media is full of halls. Every fucking thing you go on,

someone is doing a haul, or I'm saying, this bras from Amazon, this pants are from ASOS. That's the point of social media. So if we can't do that anymore... No sense. What's the...

I can't work out how this... If that's a thing, unless it's a genuine thing, but a lot of brands choose not to take up that, I don't know. It doesn't make sense. Also, do you know, so... I just had a thought,

you know, they're getting a lot of shit at the minute, because of what things are made out of and the factories. Do you think that it's just that they've done like a full sweep whether like anyone mentioning aloe that isn't involved with those? No, she said not. No, she said not. But back to social media.

So something that happened to me, which I still get messages every week about. And it's okay because I would be desperate to you. But guys, remember, if you followed me for a while, it was about three years ago. and my Instagram kept getting removed. Alex, this is your worst nightmare as my agent. There was nothing.

My agent at the time, Megan, blessed her. She was so patient with me. And actually the brands that I worked with, who a lot of them I still work with, were so patient with me. Well, because there's nothing you can do. And basically, I would log into my Instagram or just open the app and it would be a black screen

and it would go, your account has been removed or deleted, literally deleted. It happened to you once, didn't it? So they came for me and we know who it is. I don't remember who it was. Yeah. We'll discuss later.

Yeah. I've clearly erased that from my brain. Well, we have our suspicions. Basically, what they kept doing was you can pay a hacker or a tech person, the cyber criminal where they will put

box against someone's account and they will keep reporting the account and because Instagram's like oh holy fuck yeah there's a lot of reports there's random girl in Manchester and what they kept reporting me as was impersonating someone which they must have

set up a new page like Ashley Stobart and they must have been like she's impersonating me. They sent all the bots, blah, blah, blah. Kept pulling me down. Kept pulling me down. It went on for about two months. It was hell.

It was actual hell. And I really struggled to speak to anyone at Meta because, you know, in that book that I'm reading at the minute, it says they make it almost impossible to speak to a person, an actual person at Meta. but yeah it was just it was so bad and then I ended up trying to pay a hacker to get it back and they blackmailed me

that's so common we used to work together yeah don't do that like don't do that go the hackers and then the hackers and then the hacker had my passwords for everything so then they blackmailed me it was honestly and Ed had paid yet in Bitcoin so that's non-traceable they knew what they were doing

I just wanted my account back Like it was my work. A lot of them, what they do is they themselves have hacked you, hack you, and then contact you and be like, someone said that you've been hacked, I can help? Because you all do your post, like, can anyone help me? And then they're like, I can help you. Yeah.

I remember once getting an email and I got quite a few being like, we've got a, we've got videos. Oh, we all got that. And they knew your password as well. So mine were like, oh, we've got you wanking. We've got you wanking with your camera from your. laptop and I was like well joke's on you

because I treat this like this is my work laptop so I don't watch my phone on that I do nothing apart from the occasionally the weird things you guys ask me to Google when we all got told off

for having that video and you were like you've bollocked us we sent you a video and we were laughing about it and it was I don't remember this I have no idea what she's talking about

I'll tell us after I'll tell you after anyway back to his story So basically, if your account gets hacked, then you need to just contact the normal channels. And I know this is awful, but basically what happened with me was by chance. It was the last World Cup.

How often is the World Cup on every four years? So that was when it happened four years ago. And Megan was on, it was when all of the wags had to stay on that horrible boat. To remember that was hilarious. So it was in Qatar, was it? Or somewhere? Yeah, it was Qatar.

And basically they had this rule where the girls and the families could, it was like allowed alcohol, like, because it was on, offshore. If you're a certain amount of distance away in the sea, it's international water so you can drink and do what you want. Yeah, which is so clever,

but the girls are some of the videos. Like the show, it was bless them. Anyway, so because they were on this boat, they were bumping into, like, all the people all the time that were working for the team and did it. And one night she ended up sat next to the man who ran, like, all the Instagram for England. Mate, one email, sorted. My account had got, like, this mad protection on it. Like, just by chance. Just chance.

Where this story is leading to is, poor Danny Doll Beauty. As hers gone. The doll beauty account and the makeup account. This has been going on for months and XWag of Cheshire. As hers gone? Gone. So I was having my nails done at this new salon in Nutsford. Can we go together?

Don't say the name because, you know, we don't want everyone going. Well, that's what went wrong with lavish, which has gone very downhill. Molly went to this one. That's where I got it from. Right, go on. we can sit next to each other and have our hands and feet done at the same time. At the same time.

So I was in there, an ex-wag of Cheshire was there. I don't know your real name, sorry darling. But she came over and she was like, Ashley, and I was like, hi. And I think she listens to her pod. Because she was like, I know your account got taken down. Can you help me?

Because I'm being like targeted and da-da-da-da-da. And I was just like, I'm so sorry I can't. But what I would advise is don't pay someone to get it back because I think it's all a load of shit. So at this time, I remember you going on at me about being verified on Instagram. And at the time, I was like, I don't give a flying toss,

whether I've got a blue tick or not. Then I realized that if you do have a blue tick, you do have a little bit more protection. And I have to say, my experience was really different. When I got hacked, I'd already paid for a blue tick for some protection after it happened to you.

And I got through to someone on the phone straight away. Danny's not had any of your time. And it wasn't that difficult, but there's a friend, a girl, you know, who does like private detectivey stuff. Do you know what I mean? Do you remember from years ago? And I'm still in contact with her. And when I told her what happened, she knew someone as well at Meta. And she got it back for you.

And she helped me to get it back. Yes, it was only gone for a few days. But yeah, girls, just be careful. Any Insta stories like that, you tell us. Anyway. Right, we've got a break. And then we're going to do what we bought this week. And have we got a little dilemma, perhaps, a little bad, and a man of the week.

So stay tuned. Right, we are back. Ashley, tell us, my love, what you bought this week. Right, okay, we're going to be quick with this, baby. The Shark Spot Carpet Cleaner. Okay. Fuck me. Wow.

Recommendation off Luana, the podcast, right? It's a handheld carpet cleaner. Oh, lovely. Me, because usually the carpet cleaners plug into the wall instead annoying. No, no, no. It's like a thin, slim. You go over to the problem. Sort of.

Yeah. Dose beauty, collagen cans, absolutely obsessed with them. I like the berry and pomegranate. They also do lime and lemon and lime, I think it is. And basically,

one of the girls said, I think that would be nice with vodka in it. And I am not going to disagree on a collagen cocktail. Top shop jacket with the shoulder pads in, the bomber that I've got. How nice is that? I've never received so many messages about that.

The Ivy and, in Chester. It's a must visit. Had a lovely time there with Sophia. Refile, lash, sculpt, mascara, you told me to start using that ages ago. I'm using their, I've got their brow jill. Very good.

Very fucking good. White Company Winter Candle is back and you can order it on Look Fantastic with my code Ashley S-LF. Oh my God, they've got a big silver one at the minute. Oh, no. So the silver

doesn't have the standard white company written on it. It's like a big silver votive. I mean, I think I'd like it to say it. No, no, no, no. The smell of the white company winter that is nothing else like it. Stunning. Seen underwear, C-E-A-N.

I saw you post that. Manual lymphatic drainage knickers. Oh, how? Is there some fucking rollers in the knickers? Like, what? There's like wavy pattern bits and it's, and it put, put pressure on different.

That's like the stretch mark ones. The leg ones are meant to be amazing. Yeah, I've seen that. So I just think that's so clever. Obviously I've taken my Epitome tablets, but like we could all do with a bit of help in the bloat department. Maxi nourish meal prep. Alex is a bit of you.

Lucas might be a bit of you as well, Ava. Grass fed organic beef only. Right. And vegetable. all organic. So you know you're not getting the shite? Yeah, meal prep dropped off at your door. Oh, good.

Is that like local? Is it throughout the... Yeah, only in Liverpool and Manchester at the minute. But all you do is put a tiny bit of olive oil on, heat it all. Stunning. Stunning. And one of our favourites that we haven't spoken about for a long time, actually, I feel like we've got it.

The Gold Bond Body Moistreiser. I put that on. this morning. Fabulous. I like the, there's two, isn't there? The retinaw one and the crepe one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I guess that a lot actually, mushroom and I don't think that. What's cottage, strawberry and mint? Oh, it's really nice. What is it? It's on your lungs. So basically, it's a French shower gel.

Right. Cottage, strawberry and mint shower gel. I type that in on Amazon. So Harriet Westmoreland, you know, pretty manicurist. She is in like Monaco and stuff like that a lot and she buys a lot for the French pharmacy products.

Everyone loves the French pharmacy. And she always poach, like she washes your hands. Oh my God, no, it's like six quid. Yeah. Smells like a strawberry explosion. Oh, right. Well, there you go. And then you've got a, what's that?

Ooh, briosh. Guys, the memory, briosh candle. Oh, I like the sound of briosh. No, but you feel. like starving when it's lit. It smells like you are baking fresh bryosh in your house. It's warm, it's cozy, it's gorgeous, it's aesthetically pleasing.

Taylor Blue, well done you. I love her, she's a nice girl. Lip Q, licorice bar. All right. It's cold sauce season. Yeah? This is a Patreon recommendation. By the way, another recommendation, Patreon.

If you're not on there, get on there because oh god you find it all sorts on there all sorts any drama going on on Instagram like the Chloe Ferry thing which we'll probably talk about later you pop it in there and everyone knows shit the Louisa Zussman thing as well yeah you put it in everyone's like oh well I know

and someone's on me there and you're like oh really yeah oh you put in like I've got like there's no nasty this no I've got an itchy eye and everyone's like babes bang bang bang bang bang so so we always talk about like cold sores all of that stuff baby bum rash all sorts and one of the girls recommended lip cue licorice bar. I think it's a tenor off Amazon and got rid of my cold sore so quick. Right. Well,

that's a big one then. Right. Love that list. Very, very nice. But we're going to move to a dilemma now, my darling. Okay, let's see what we think of this. Me and this lad grew up together, and he always said that he was going to marry me when we got older. I gave him a random chance after being single for 16 years. I've only ever been in one relationship. I gave him a chance, three wonderful months and then something changed I'm thinking he's got back with his ex but the family being lovely to me

and saying I'm better off without him he ghosted me after being at mine for three months every single day I messaged his mum telling her how much I like him that was a mistake and I hope he's okay then the mum blocks me

I need your girl's opinions right how savage are we going to be what are you messaging his mum for he's fucked you off I know that's not the question but he's fucked you off, right? After three months have been together, he's done a runner, and then you've decided to message his mother.

Yeah, but that's something that you would have done when you were like 18. Oh, yeah, yeah. I would have done. If I'm not getting an answer, I'm like, I've got nothing to lose. No. Integrity.

Even if Ed now ghosted me, I wouldn't even, like, I wouldn't even message his mom. And I'm saying this from a place of listen. Really? I'm saying this from a place of, of being like, I've been there. Just get a solicitor. Just enjoy the money.

Where's a granny? I've probably got more at the minute though. I'm saying this from a place of literally, I've been there and I've been that girl. I once stayed friends with someone's mom. Oh my. And kept contact with her just in case. And then he could be like,

if they're at a family dinner, his mum would be like, oh, she's lovely. That's like, oh, it's so fucking embarrassing like that. I'd make you mom to that. No, because I know some girls that are like that and they stay friends with the mum, like go around for secret brews with the mum and stuff like that. If you actually had a friendship, then I'm not asked,

but I know that mine was purely because I hope that one day she would say, she was lovely that Lauren. Oh, what a gimp. It's so embarrassing. Anyway, you should never have messaged his mom and said how much you like him that you hope he's okay. Like, that's really bad. Read the book, why men love bitches.

It's really bad. And then the mum blocks you. So I think you... We don't tell anyone this story. We don't tell anybody about this. We move on. So what you're looking for here is close. from the situation

and you're not going to get it. Do you remember that thing we said the other week, delete the paragraph? Yeah. It's that you're never going to know. Maybe you did get back with the ex. Maybe he realised, and this is going to hurt a little bit,

but it's happened to me. Maybe you just realise that I just, you're not the one for me. Like you sound, I like her, but I'm not obsessed with her. She's not the one for me. I'm still shagging such and such. I don't feel about it.

And it's not nice and it's rejection, but you won't care in like a year anyway. I remember, I split up with someone and he kept, and I just got together with Ed actually and he kept ringing the house phone and I don't think you could block numbers on the house phone and the worst one that he did was I remember

I was like hung over to fuck on New Year's Day one year and I was sat with Ed and my dad rang me and I picked up and he was like tell that boy to stop ringing a fucking house phone he was drunk as a scum and he was saying how much he loves you and all this and I was like on speaker phone in front of my head like ah I'm sorry I have tried to tell him I'm trying to tell him but yeah that's the thing listen you've done it now it's fine

how are you see is it by the way to block someone fucking love that for us in 2026 like you know we're evolving I think that's the point of the matter is brilliant the point of the matter is you're never going to know why it didn't work but for some reason it didn't you have got to move on do not fucking contact him or his family ever again yeah and I don't know why but don't ever do that again. Right, man of the week you ready for this. I'm nominating one of my boyfriend's best mate's Todd

he's 37 Todd Todd. It's not an odd name isn't it? You don't hear that very much. John Cranes! You don't hear that. Todd Crane! You don't hear that anymore. Todd Cranes!

From Brighton because we've decided it's about time someone snapped him up. Todd runs his own VIP hospitality business creating incredible experiences across music and sport so his life involves a fair amount of travel

racing golfs gigs nice restaurants and getting people into places that the rest of us can't get into give me his fucking number but despite that description he's most definitely not a fuck boy he's funny he's handsome he's sociable he loves the dance

he's very much into golf and he's happy as surrounded by his mates having a laugh he's a really really silly side. He's family, fuck, you know, flamly orientated and great with kids. He needs a girl who can do both sides of life. Someone who can get dressed up and slot straight in at the races, but is equally happy

spending a Friday night down the local pub with everybody. Social and confident. No kid yet, but he's 100% daddy and husband material. He's built his business, has a great social life, but he's missing the right girl to share it with. Fuck, you know. Guys, I give you Todd. So basically, if you can go from a dress to

heels and ask on Saturday to a day down the beach pub then go for him. Toddy McCann I'm going to have

a look because he sounds fucking perfect here is a picture for YouTube his profile private but we'll put his

his have we fully vatted him I'm going to check him now so his name is Todi T O

D-D-Y McCann as in Maddle No I can say a Madlin McCann if I

want it's my podcast Toddy McCam is he related to them looks attractive bloke. Like, no bother. All good. I've got one person in common. I'm not going to say

it is just in case. Yeah, look, decent. Nice. Yeah. Guy, girls, he's, I'd say he's a pretty good one. Go and get on Todd. Right, guys, we are calling it a day, but we're moving things over to the bonus. Either you're listening on Apple Subs or Patreon if you want to watch it as well, but we're moving over there. We're talking about something we touched on earlier, Chloe Ferry, the drums with her post. We're talking a little bit of 90s nostalgia as well. We're going to talk about review my face, a little bit about aesthetics providers and how to pick them and what to look for. And then we're going to do a little segment about what we wish we knew about men.

So the bonus is actually really going off. So we will see you over that. Love you. Bye.