Nip Tuck - Rat Man & Brad Skip!

Episode Date: July 15, 2025

Hear the hilarious reason Ashley went viral last week. And Lauren tells her Rat Man story!We also read out some of your friendship fallouts! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

guys hello and welcome to nip tuck not giving up this is your wednesday haven and we have got a lot of stuff to talk about now first we need to caveat this something's going on with apple subscription right over to you christina you just looked at me then um right i don't know if it's going to be resolved by the time that this comes out so maybe we'll record a separate thing as well but we are switching over our apple subscription so it's causing us a right load of bother so if you are subscribed to apple subscription where you get the bonus episodes you may have to re-subscribe to it again not repay yes just re-subscribe to it but all of our bonus episodes are on patreon yeah if you want to use that instead not gonna lie patreon's a little bit

it is you get to talk to us yeah it's like only fans without the nipples although although i feel like there are nipples yeah but no listen wherever you listen to it is absolutely fine but if there's something wrong with it we're really sorry and we are working on it and you won't have to pay anymore but you might have to like resubscribe or you might have to do nothing and this is bollocks because it might be fixed yeah so basically patreon's just where it's at yeah because you'll get the bonuses you get the chat feature you get all of our different group chats the blogs all of the discounts you're gonna say dick then all the dick pics um yeah so that's that anyway i'm not interested in that what i'm interested in is builder gate ashley went viral

guys ashley went viral can you tell us okay so start so if you don't know ashley recorded a video of a fit builder it went viral and tell us from the beginning so i'd been recording here and then i went to meet my mum for a salad in the garden in hayle i hate salad and it had gnocchi in it fried gnocchi it was so nice i hate salad so we went to the garden in hayle and we saw our friend you know hayley fletcher yes yes so we me and her and mum were stood talking and out of the corner of my eye i saw a topless man and i went girls girls look and everyone was like whoa wow not seen anything like that for a while you know we're all there like thirsty women yeah like i'm there in my 30s hayley's there in her 40s mum's there in her 60s and we're all like

wow you know we were yeah we were just it doesn't matter how old you are you can appreciate appreciating that was it yeah so then me and mum go and get in my car to drive home and we get stuck behind a bin truck like you know one of those ones that stops outside restaurants and takes all the bottles and stuff like that. It's bin men. A bin man. And then the man, the sexy builder man, was on top of the skip.

And my mum has got, you know, one of those phones with the old lady cases. Oh, the unflippable. And my mum was going, Ashley, pretend that I'm taking a picture of you. So it was mum's fault. So I'm there like, and then he goes,

oh, are you taking pictures? so i wound the window down mate do you mind if we do a tiktok bear in mind we're on full on hail high street but we are stuck behind this bin man and this bin is that what you're allowed to say bin man or they call waste disposal man yeah and he was like taking his time and he was like just not so the car was still and there was no danger so then i was like do you mind if i do a tiktok so i was like oh so you asked him first of course i would not do that without consent no oh so then i was like oh my god that's how it opens so it does look really bad and then it was like right i've got a lot of single girls on here yeah i was doing it for the galleys and the guys and i said

um drop your insta handle yeah and he did and he said are you single i said no i'm his face i'm married his face fell um i can imagine your mom in the background yeah she was like giggling um and then i put it on tiktok didn't really think too much of it well put it on patreon as well and then yeah it's got over seven million views now but the comments of the men are horrendous they're like look do this is what is wrong with society today this is a married woman and then they're all like and you know you're saying it

I'm married imagine if the roles were reversed to be fair yeah but I asked him yeah to be fair if it was the other way around we say this all the time

don't we we actually don't care yeah but it's how angry the men are getting yeah I thought they were a bit like not arsed they're clearly

sensitive Sally's aren't they and then they're like saying all like mean things where they're kind of like he skipped like day and I'm like

oh fuck off you wish you looked like that Barry at home with his beer belly someone called him Brad Skip anyway so when i first did this um video of ollie s7 um he's hungry for it yeah so he had like and don't blame him yeah yeah um he had like 800 followers on instagram now he's got yeah let's

have a look let's have a look we'll have a look we'll have a look um loads of pages have now he's 21 000 right can i just say something i am slogging my guts off day after day to improve my following for my job and ollie with his top off gets 20 000 in a few days like come on what do i have to do ollie made my tiktok following go up i've now got 33 000 on tiktok i don't try on there but lately i really have um what do we have to do to get an influx like that i will get in a skip i will take my top off and get in a skip we need to follow his journey we need him to do a brand deal and then ashley needs to be part of the percentage yeah we could get him on the pod it got me thinking like if people because i thought right okay so this worked for ollie

maybe i need to follow james round every day and be like what you're wearing today build a boy and just take videos of him because maybe that will work for tips so if anyone sees any fit workmen obviously with permission then film them and let's start this being a thing over summer because do you know what there are a lot of fit workmen around and that's what mum did say oh laura needs to do this of james i might start turning up so start tagging us guys yeah let's get some fit workmen i wouldn't i was thinking about the bin men they couldn't really take their top off because that's unhygienic well also they're um they work for the council don't they so i'm not so they're not self-employed yeah they could it would need to be a self-employed person

but honestly it was so funny me and mum were sat in the car and it was like at school finish time so there was all these mums like crossing road with the kids and you could see the mums were looking at him and then they were looking at us like you're crossing the road they've let the kids cross the road on their own the pram's gone down the high street it's so funny it's like the diet coke man though that's honestly some of the comments are like i wonder if her husband and like has seen this as we know at tiktok comments i never do and i actually looked because i do i bite back and i can't help it i actually looked at one the other day and it must have come up on my page i don't know how i ended up looking i didn't go on our page and it was when i'm talking

about having sex with james and somebody had commented like oh great but you can't wait for your daughter to see you talking about shagging i was like oh this is why i don't look tiktok's like the wild west with comments do you think it's because it's not as like regulated who the accounts are whereas insta it's kind of you know who it is it's just two totally different vibes two totally i feel like you can be a bit more open though on tiktok and silly and but yet the comments don't allow that do you know what i mean it's weird whereas insta we don't get i've got two totally different personalities on tiktok and insta yeah yeah i'm i have done a bit and i am going to do more because what we really need to talk about on there god this is really bothering

me these pants um i need to tell you the rat man story right everyone settle down for the rat so i am gonna make this into a tiktok um probably next year no when i've got time i'm gonna i am no i am i'm gonna do it today right let me sit down and let me tell you the rat man story so my mom had a wasp's nest in her i've got one as well there's wasps and there's flying ants everywhere were in her um some eves i think what's an eve i don't know but it's in her eves one of her neighbors told her so she went online she went a comparison website an eve yeah i don't know what that is maybe it wasn't an eve and she went on a comparison website and found this local place i think they're in hyde i feel like so they came out and she rang me and she's like oh lauren they

were absolutely lovely these two lads they were so nice because she's 70 she's on her own let's not pretend she's frail you've all heard her on here but she is on her own she's got no man in the house so they came and did it they charged her and then they were like they had to go into the i think they went to check in the attic for wasps and they came down and they were like wasps are fine you've not got any wasps but you have got a rat infestation and she's like your mum lives in a bungalow as well she does she wants she actually wanted a pet rat i was like maybe they could keep one yeah i said but you don't now anyway so she's like oh my god you're Jo can obviously imagine.

I can imagine Liz like, oh, no. Rats. Rats. She was like, what? And they were like, yeah. She said, how do you know? Have you seen them?

And she was like, he said, well, we've seen rat droppings. There is evidence of things being gnawed. So listen to this fact, right? This will knock you sick. I keep thinking about it when I'm doing night feeds. Rats' teeth continue to grow

and never, they never stop growing. So they just grow and grow and grow and grow and grow. Like your nose and your clit. Yeah, just like your clit. And your ears. right it's true so what we do is they know on things to shave their teeth down because they

would grow so don't rub so maybe we need to rub our clits on stuff and isn't there something like another fact of like in the uk there is a rat always within like a certain thought of you so they told her about this rat infestation and they were really really nice because she you know like she's nice when you get nice people she was like oh thank you so much like what what can i do when can you fit me in she's like ugh so they rang the manager and put him on speaker

and he was like look you're fully booked mate you're full but Tuesday is your day off and he went do you know what love

I'll come in on Tuesday how nice I can't have you worrying about it so she went to bed that night and she said she was lying there

like and she could hear the rat she could hear like so she was all flustered about the whole thing and she rang us and she said it's going to cost

two to three grand and James was like two to three grand get a whole new body into it and they had to pull out her entire loft get rid of the rats blah blah blah so james was like get a second opinion liz two to three grand sounds like a lot of money and she was like no they're really nice i just don't think we're like he's coming in on tuesday on his day off quick we need

to decide quick right now yeah so she i said please mum get a second opinion get these rats gone get these rats out of there last thing we need not when my tommy's there no not my tommy the bloody rats in the house you fine Liz fine James not Tommy not Tommy no but you do need to have him next week so I mean if he's there I'm sure I'll be fine because I am busy so she gets the second man round now I was having the day of like the day I had some of my days I just think how is this real like we always laugh at me because there's a Katie Price meme where she's she's saying and then this happened and then my dog died and that's me every day on the voice note to the girls and I was having one of those fucking days everything it was the Apple subs day

I couldn't saw the apple subs the baby's crying I've shit myself it was just a wild day then my mum rings me I've got a thrush I've got a thrush

the baby's got a thrush in his mouth I've got him in my fanny so anyway oh god there's that as well was it the tongue tie day so then I go down and Tommy Bruce

asked to have his tongue tie cut and it was wild then my mum rings me oh you're not gonna believe this I said what she said the second rat man's been there's no rats there is no rat infestation

those bastards i'm gonna say i fight you i'm gonna say it there is there is a rat here i've been waiting to say this there are rats and it's you so so i'm trying to speed this up so there's no rats there is no rats at all they made it up they made the whole conversation up they made the day off up to swindle my 70 year old mother this man came down and he was like there are no rats there is no feces there is no chewing they don't exist you've been absolutely had off so i was raging so i rang them because i thought i'm going to be clever about this you know like when we say about you find a man cheating don't spill your your beans yeah hold off yeah like get get your documents yeah get your file your receipts

so i rang him and i thought i'm gonna film this so i set it up rang him put him on speaker spoke to him and i just said look my mum's 70 she's really nervous about everything i just wanted to lay down i laid it on thick she's a vulnerable woman on her own she goes to the gym twice a day but i didn't mention that she's a vulnerable 70 year old woman on her own she's a widow she's a widow so i said i just want to check what you found and i said so you found droppings yep we did we found i basically got him to when you get a man to cheat you go so you never went to that place no i never went you never heard of that girl never heard of her and you get the lies yeah so i got the light and i'm on speaker i'm going oh like this at the phone oh yeah

is that right and i said so just let me check is there any point in you coming back out and just triple checking before we pay this money i've been doing this job 20 years i said so you're a hundred percent there are rats in that house i'm a hundred percent and i'm going like this at the phone yeah you're fucking liar so i got all the information so the man has written a report saying there is no evidence categorically categorically no rats he's made um he's told my not one piece of poo at all there is no rats up there and this guy's going oh yeah they go up and down the drain pipe and your neighbor's garden's not looking good they'll of course those rats so my mum's fuming at a fucking neighbor she rings up it's them that have caused them rats there's

no rats why like left bins yeah it's the neighbors it's a long grass my mum said i knew they should have cut that grass so she's practically gone around and banged on the door and accused them because of their untidiness of causing these rats so anyway no there's no rats so what it was tommy it was tommy so what i'm gonna do next and when i get a minute it's been very frantic i am now gonna ring the owner of the company we've companied housed him we found his name and i'm gonna ring him and i'm gonna tell him my findings and i'm gonna tell him it's going on social media and if he's got a problem i'm gonna suggest that he comes to my mum's house again and takes me in the loft i will go up there never mind james because i'm worse than james i'm a pitbull when it comes to

my mom no you're a pug i'm a pug and you can take me into that loft and you can show me the rats so yeah that's where we're at um and i'm going to fit i filmed it all i just need to edit it when i've got time and i'm gonna ring him today so basically be careful this is like what was that called rogue traders do you remember that that was fucking now what i was going to do so i rang ashley i'd talk me and christine were already speaking that day about the fucking apple subs and i was like and there's a rat as well anyway rang ashley's a seller and she was like let's film them when they come but i couldn't because you have to pay 50 up from otherwise i would have got them back in the house yeah see that rogue traders that used to make me so angry and

you remember that man used to present it and it was like they'd come around like knocking on doors of pensioners and stuff like that and like do you want a new driveway and you need new windows you've got mould on them and it was all lies and then he'd chase them down the road and then people would be hiding the face and he'd be going how do you feel about ripping pensioners off I don't think you'd be allowed to do that now there's something must have happened

I don't think you could and I would have done it myself James was like I'll wait there when they get there I'll stand there and I thought you've not even got time to pick Tommy up so I think it was on that day I thought let's not go there now got time to go to the gym though haven't you hun anyway so sorry that's a separate issue

how angry do you get with them when you're postpartum and they're going to the gym so do you know what i did last night so james came on in his food james came on pretty early last night um actually we went for a walk which is unusual but in the evening he had hold of tommy and tommy's at a stage now he can't really put him down and james like we just grab him i'm hungry and i went in there and i went i'd love to grab him while you're hungry but unfortunately i've got jujitsu um because he goes to use it after work and then i'm gonna have to come home and have a shower then i'm gonna eat my dinner but then i'll do a 10 minute poo i'll do a 10 minute poo but then i'll definitely grab him for you hon and he just looked at me he didn't even get it he

was really confused i was like i'm being you i'm taking the piss and he was like all right so are you gonna grab him while i get some straight over his head anyway so i will update you on rat man um uh also while i'm at it tommy bruce had a tongue tie he's had it snipped if your child has reflux it is well worth looking at i had to pay privately which is just ridiculous it cost me 260 quid um and he couldn't move it when they looked at him he couldn't move his tongue even left or right it was fully tongue tied so he had really tight really tight so he had it caught wasn't that bad guys if you're thinking of doing it it wasn't pleasant and he cried a bit but it was fine so yeah that's all i really have to say about that in fact i'm bored of talking about

tommy for once so i've had enough chat about his wind and his tongue tie and his poo and he's gagging on his bottle i'm done with infocol and gripe water i'm finished so i feel like i need to just take up some form of hobby to calm me down oh my god no have you seen people adults doing colouring adults doing colouring for me sorry if i find anyone is giving anxiety and depression it's giving mental health am i allowed to say you don't even have time to do anything so that was probably really triggering for you seeing people colouring in like i i honestly needed a poo about nine o'clock yesterday morning i think i had it at 10 p.m because i was that busy i kept forget and then then it'd gone back up again i am not sat doing dot to dots and coloring what is it

what what is that would you ever do coloring in no would you christina i'd feel like a right dick when i do with my niece that's different i don't even do that and i and i feel like i want mine to look so much better than hers and i want her to praise me and she doesn't praise me i want it to be like really impressed are you like but she's not you go to her like look look at mine yes and she's not asked about and you know what annoys me when they go out of the lines like when we're doing what a joint coloring i'm like fuck job it up yeah and they do the wrong colors and yeah like why are you drawing the hair red like green it's not realistic do the hair in a hair color like what the fuck if ever i do stuff with fear i get very frustrated like that where

actually where did you get you because like yesterday she sent this coloring book thing into the group where did that even come from like it was on someone's instagram and you just saw someone and they were sat doing coloring in but why did they have you done the washing like i think this is people without kids it must be i i think the reason that do you know what one of my friends one of my friend's husbands and he's not weird um does jigsaws yeah he's not weird here look it's a grown-up for everyone asking these are the colouring books that i use maybe if you have a kind of cozy friends cute and comforting colouring book so my way of dopamine hit and distraction is temu and

and you know what's great on that it's not ethically all the rest no um temu or like just mindlessly scrolling through tiktok and then i have a one a distraction thing i don't think i have one skincare sometimes can calm me down a little bit i don't think i think i just fill it with more mine's like ticking off lists that makes me feel really really happy like making lists of everything and ticking stuff off but i don't ever i feel like i very rarely disconnect you know way i think when i'm in the car i have no music on nothing so i sit in silence maybe that's like a disconnect but i don't think i have like um a time where i'm not thinking about a million things i don't feel like i ever have a a switch off even if i went to a spa i'd be thinking about what i'm

gonna do when i get out yeah i don't so maybe coloring would stop my mind for a minute but i don't have time to do that because in that hour i've got like stuff to do and lists to tick off yeah maybe we should get it and try it maybe don't knock it some people like journaling journaling is that where you write down your feelings yeah when you were younger did you used to have a diary with a lot oh my god it's saying i'd get i used to write all kinds of shite in there my mum i bet used to piss herself yeah i would read if i found fears i know it's oh my god i would i would absolutely read it i would i used to yeah mum was being cow she said i could have a banana as my and i wanted a packet of crisps yeah we've just been talking about this

haven't we about the snack drawer do you have a snack drawer uh yeah i've got a cupboard and it's at the top so the little bastards can't reach it we have but now they've learned that they can get a stool and i find them both like climbing on each other's shoulders and you hear sasky like teddy teddy come here no shashia mommy said because he's so good mommy said no and she's on his shoulders they're like teddy's favorite thing is a rusk and he calls it a baby biscuit oh that's still very innocent isn't it yeah girls are so much more switched on and conniving them boys like she'd be like eating like tang fast sticks like and wouldn't care just because they were there she would eat them all i sometimes go in and thea's got a more yeah yeah like a

hamster she did it the other day i said you can have something from the snack job but have like one of the more healthy things and i went in she was like and i was literally like have you got the harry bows in your mouth and then she just laughed and i actually caught i'll be the eldest i went in and i saw him really quickly shut the door and run and i was like come here and he had a chewing gum why why are they obsessed with chewing gum one of my most vivid memories i was around at my friend's house and we were playing and i when i was younger and still now actually i'm a rooter do not leave me on my own in your you would root as well i would i would look through someone's medicine cabinet i'd be googling what medicine they have

I would do that. I'd be like, fucking hell, what the fuck? How long have you been suffering with that for? If I find a cyclovir in my house, it's not for my panny, it's for my mouth. Why would you be on herpes? I would be Googling and I wouldn't be able to keep it in what I found in there. Did I tell you when James found my cyclovir? Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

If someone found a cyclovir, then... Not that there's anything at all wrong with... People get genital herpes. But it is for both versions of herpes. but it is for both versions and James antidepressants they cycle a bit

he literally when he was I must have been it was when we first got together I think we've been together like a month and I was going to his

and I had my wash bag and I wasn't hiding nothing to and I'd had lip blush so I'd got some to prevent the cold sores and he had gone to get maybe a tooth

I don't know and he'd seen it and he'd obviously he's such a panic his head had gone he'd googled it and he'd I could tell something

was wrong that night he was just he's a real worrier and i could tell that he just wasn't right and he was just a bit like and we got in bed and then silence i'm on his chest and he went i need to ask you something and i was always found out about that fucking bloke and he was and he was like no it wasn't there was only two of them it wasn't i'm joking and he went i didn't mean i did not mean i did not mean to find it but i saw some medication i was like which are the antidepressant yeah i've got horrific depression and he's like

No, no, the herpes stuff. I found the herpes stuff. Have you got herpes? And he's like, I'm not bothered if you have. I'm not bothered. But I just, you know, I need to know. And I was like, no. And he was like, I found it.

I've checked it. I know it is. And I said, I've just had lip blushes, so I don't get a cold sore. And he was like, oh, I'm not bothered. And there isn't, listen. No, so. But if you're sexually active with someone,

I understand why. He was like, and then I got all, I have it all. We found, me and my friend, And I must have been like six, seven, a condom under her mum and dad's bed. And I can fully remember. My friend found a dildo. And we were like, woo! Yeah.

Dildo. And we were like, woo, what's this? Like, blow it up. And we were like, it smells weird. What is this? What is this? And did she ask her mum? No, we were just playing with it.

Throwing it around. And I think we just left it. And then we found this at one of my other friend's house. A dildo. Yeah, I found dildos. But it was like a vibrator. Not my mum. Right?

In a box. and it was the white bit there was the vibrator that you could switch on and then it had all different heads oh good idea like a theragun like an airwrap one was a spiky one

and we were playing with it and do you know what the funniest thing is and then now looking back I was like I was touching that fucking dildo do you know what the funniest thing is I bet it was going up her dad's arse yeah and I was like what the fuck what do you fancy tonight Peter

spiky bum bum I remember like finding tampons and sanitary towels as well in my mum's and me and my sister

like just stuck them all over the window everywhere yeah I remember and my mum was like for fuck's sake I remember finding tampons

and thinking considering putting it in my vagina because she's just like what should I do with it it used to come with instructions as well I remember reading

the instructions and feeling like I was reading a porno like really naughty like fucking and then when my mum came back it showed a banny

didn't it Yeah, it showed a fan in it and I was like, oh, putting it all away. And I remember thinking, I can't wait one day to use a tampon. Do you know, like, wanting to be so grown up? Yeah. I don't know where we've gone with all this. Speaking of kids being, like, annoying, what are you going to do in the six-week holidays?

Because that is... So, I booked Saskia into Stagecoach. Oh, what a bloody good idea. You know, the performing arts one. oh she will love that um so i've booked her into that and then does nursery stop in the six week holiday no no so it's just school i can't remember you know and then my sister's home for three weeks so i'll do some bits with her then do you know what she's just so easy i find thea quite easy to be fair but it's more when you've got to go to work it's like all of a sudden you think i thought

right i'm good i'm in a routine and then i thought fuck it's the six week holidays so i'm sat there with my diary my dad isn't doing this because it's all on the bloody woman and i'm like right mum can you over that day can you over that day it's so expensive do you know we took them trampolining i mean we have got like a lot of them oxygen i can't remember it was it was literally 150 pounds yeah and i have got a lot of kids and the socks and every time i think i'm keeping them i think i'm keeping them i'm taking them back next time and then like for a slushy it's like whatever yeah it costs a fortune so i'm trying to find like day i don't mind if it's sunny it's all right this weekend somewhere called castaway what's that and do you fuck them up sounds great

water play and it's like push them on a boat to an island and fuck them off no honestly it looked like they had like the best time well the nanny took them so i don't know i think it's like near liverpool maybe and have you seen that slime world it looked oh i might go there yeah we've just got some tickets for something called diva fest which actually that sounds like a bit of me a bit of me it's not a drag thing um why is it called diva fest it's spelled d-e-v-a maybe it's called deva is it deva no that sounds weird diva deva first i need to check that so it's in cheshire it's in some castle and i can't remember the name of it and it's on in august i can't remember the dates i'll check but but i'll check but basically so do you know when you go to these things and

the kids want to go on all the rides and you're like five pound ago and you're like you're taking the piss so basically it's like an adult and a kids festival and you go and the kids have so once you've bought your ticket it's unlimited rides for the kids which to me when you've got four kids and a baby is just ideal so they can go on it again and again and you're not getting angry thinking i need to remortgage at this point there's a silent disco there's like live music Hey, Gloria Gaynor's there. Who's that? I Will Survive.

Oh, my God. Yeah, and there's a lot, like, Cigala's there. It's really good. Hey, hey, guess what? There's a silent disco. So we're going to go. It's the 7th to the 10th of August. I've just checked.

I'll put it on my link because I actually think it's a really good idea. You can go. You don't have to worry about money when you're there. There's drinks, there's bars, there's discos. It's like kids and grown-ups. And kids and grown-ups love it, so that'd be World of Harry Bow. so yeah i'm very bing bong boo today but i'll put it on my link because it looks really good i will put the ticket link so it's diva fest in cheshire i'll see you there guys now after the chat in

patreon we do you know what we get a lot of chat about content friendship fallouts not so many actually about relationship because it that's quite like black and white i think yeah whereas friendship can be a lot more complex especially female friendships yep and very complex i agree i mean men are like hello lad yeah and that's it don't like him so i'm not gonna ring him again yeah like there's no bitching no no i never hear james bitch and um yeah but with girls it's very complex and we get a lot of questions about it so i threw something out there and i put girls what are your biggest friendship x slash why or when have you decided to split up with a friend because these things actually like we talk about relationships but like you say

friendships kind of be like span over like 20 years it can be deep can't it and it can really affect you because if especially if you're single as well they are your lifeline a lot of the time so it is quite it's quite an emotional subject so we've got some in here okay right go on what are