Nip Tuck - Who Hid The Viagra?

Episode Date: July 5, 2023

In today's episode, Ashley tells us about a cool new facebook group she's joined that's got some very generous people on it and Lauren's gone all CSI after a mysterious item turns up hidden away in her house. Plus the girls ask a very important question: What's the weirdest thing you've found in someones bedside drawer?To sign up for Patreon for more exclusive content and full video episodes, click this link: https://patreon.com/niptuckpodTo get involved with the show, you can send us a DM on Instagram and TikTok, find us @niptuckpod.Or you can email [e-mail] can also send us your beauty questions, icks, dilemma's and Slutty Susan confessionals via WhatsApp! You can text or voice note the girls on [phone] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

happy wednesday guys and welcome to nip tuck not giving a fuck this is the podcast where we celebrate being positive aspirational women we are the sexy chosen ones baby girls we are the girls this is about being unapologetically yourself on nip talk we want you to get your voice heard we need you we are nothing without our team you can email us they've not died so ashley's just said that someone's died that hasn't died and we're gonna have to now cut half the beginning out because she's just checked and no they haven't died why did you make that 40 now you make some weird shit up um anyway if you want to get in touch with us you can email us hello at nip tuck pod dot com you can get in touch via whatsapp as well you can voice note us

we want to know everything from you everything that you hear here any input you've got send it over let's all share it yeah so we had a really cool guest on last week claudia lauren she's great friend she was absolutely stunning and she was lovely if you've got any guest ideas by the way guys send them in but we make them realistic because mariah care ain't coming on i mean we We could ask. We could ask her. Yeah. Or what you could do, guys,

is like spam the fuck out of someone. Keep tagging us on the page and then they might be like, who are these girls? We could do that. Who would we like to? I'd like to do Katie Price. Can everyone spam Katie?

I love Katie Price. Can everyone at and DM Katie and be like, listen to this? I'd love to like just meet her in person. Yeah. Can you all send her our clips? Just absolutely spam her. Yeah.

She's just starting a podcast. I'll go on hers. I need to listen. Anyhow. Okay. So we are back in surgery. we are back ladies and gentlemen here we are so welcome back guys let's do a little get straight in there with the life updates what do you think so i have written here a story to remind you

whenever anything happens i always want to tell the gang um so i am still decorating downstairs like it's not even a big house at your house yeah still still um i feel like trades people they never come is that not but isn't James a builder yeah but all girls whose husbands

are builders always say that their house they don't do it everyone goes like how lucky are you going out with a builder because fuck me

he knocked a wall down and then he didn't do anything he took the flooring up and that was it and he's been working away at the minute so he's just left me in what looks like a crack den

oh no I've been living in a crack den is there dust everywhere no no no it's not like that it's fine it's just like the carpet is desperate for replacing

there has been plaster up the wall it's not been painted not aesthetic girly oh god not aesthetic girly like my videos i have to go west well i have to more amy winehouse i have to go to like a different part of the room and stand in the corner where there's the one white wall anyway so um luckily one of my old friends is a painter and decorator so he came and he decorated the living room which was great living room in the kitchen thank god finally anyway luckily i know him and i've known him since about 14 i get this video and he goes hey lauren i'm just up what just painting the top up here on the kitchen i'm up on the worktop so he's painting right down to the back of the cupboards you know your kitchen cupboards so then guess what i found on the top of

the cupboards hey he starts waving a viagra on the packet we don't know must be one of your ex-boyfriends waving the viagra he goes hey we don't know i was fucking and they'd hidden it up yeah so so a lad's come in your house and hidden in viagra i don't know or they might have sold it because apparently a lot of men at work so this is what the guy said to me when i used to sell them at work apparently now before it was like legal over the counter yeah apparently if you can get it in america and you bring it builders and like trace like the older older builders and the older plumbers and all that on site you could do a bit of wheelie dealing and selling the so i don't know i don't know but it was really embarrassing and luckily it was full there

was none out of it so that makes me think i must what are you gonna do with them i think they're still there i'd throw them away he doesn't need them they're still there i think would that not like i don't get the whole viagra thing i think a lot of the time it's when people have been on benders when lads have been on benders but they still want to show and they still want to shag and they can't because they get the penis, it won't work. I think that's when men take them. Maybe older men as well. Or maybe when they want to go all night.

Oh, no, please, no. No, no, no, no, no. So I will definitely put the Vagra in the bin because the last thing I want is shagging all night. Once is 15 minutes is enough. I had this cleaner once and I used to leave my vibrator under my pillow by mistake sometimes and she'd fully make the bed and put the vibrator back into the pillow.

Oh, God, I wouldn't even touch it. Anyway, let's move on. My cleaner's found some really funny things in my house and she never says anything. Bet cleaners find some funny shit. She's sound. Yeah, don't go in my bedside drawers. No, that's where my weird stuff is.

Really weird. Has anyone else got weird stuff in the bedside drawers? I just feel like it's where you go, where shall I put this? I need to bin it. You think, oh, I'd better not bin it. Bedside drawer. Bedside drawer.

And you think it's a bit weird. Bedside drawer. Girls, what's the weirdest shit you've found in a guy's bedside drawers? That's what you need to do. You need to go in a guy's bedside drawer. Yeah. every bitch

goes through a guy's bedside drawer yeah the first thing you do when you're on your own as a girl when you are left in a guy's house

you run run to the bedside table and you see what's in there I agree that is where the that's where the good shit is that's how you can tell

how weird someone is you put your medication everything weird was in there like do you google people's drugs when you go in someone's bathroom cupboards

yes same I take pictures of them and then I google them yeah because you want to know what have you got wrong with you Is it something that you go, I'm going to catch? Is it catching? Is it catching?

Anyway, right. What have I done this week? I went to, I've had like three facials. When you're pregnant, can you have like... Not a lot. No, can you not? More like massage-y ones. Can you have peels and stuff when you're pregnant?

Because I absolutely will. Certain really like, Lauren. It's your fucking skin. I'm sorry. No, you need to be really careful. Really? it's not it's not just because of like the baby it's like your hormones are all over the place so so your skin sensitivity and everything right okay fair enough like even like you get like you're

quite good with like not burning and stuff you burn right okay stuff like that um i went to the new space nk store opening it looked unreal it was while i was at work she texted me at the end she's like you really missed out space okay and i was like thank you i was at work it was it was amazing and i met caroline herons oh my god was that yeah she was really nice um and they've got like every brand in there so there's this brand called cosas beauty have you heard of it yes and their concealer is the best concealer i've ever really the thing is with the cosas beauty i think that space nk liverpool is the only one that actually has it in the store yeah like the manchester and wilmslow one don't have it um and i got to try like all these brands out that i've

never tried before also i've been using the augustina spader rich rich cream have you heard of it i didn't think that was that good did you not i feel like because my skin's not my skin at the minute that's what i mean i put it on and i was like oh nice yeah it's an old lady cream this is what i feel like that yeah to me it's an old lady cream i've got old lady skin right yeah that's why then yeah to me that would not be good on my skin um it's too rich yeah too rich but yeah it's like it's an old lady cream yeah that's what i feel exactly that's exactly a good way to describe it and then other good bits that i got oh god i got so much oh laura mercier coconut and almond have you ever had their range you like the creme brulee one actually don't you they've discontinued

the creme brulee really yeah and they bought out I love anything with almond body oils and it's coconut almond body oil

you need to get it before you go on holiday oh that sounds really nice coconut and oh I love coconut I love almond and I love vanilla

yes it's stunning it tastes like a trifle so they were some of the bits that I got another weird do you want to hear a little weird

and wonderful yeah so you know I spoke about that cup that you used to get pregnant yeah i've had we're not talking to greg's so many messages and we have on the pod page about the

cup anyway on tiktok everyone was sending me this page because these cups now it must just be like my algorithm but i'm seeing them everywhere are you seeing them everywhere okay it's my algorithm then i'm seeing these cups everywhere spunk cups and there's this company and it came up and a few people sent me the tiktok of it and they sell a kit so do you remember i had the dream when i was using the cup yeah the time of conception yeah i had the dream that lauren i made lauren pregnant with james's sperm and a syringe from the syringe like you do and i there was this page and it's a cup a syringe and some sperm so you can buy the full kit to get pregnant by yourself we don't need men anymore we really don't so it said buy the kit and then you go on this face i bet the sperm

would still be annoying you go on this facebook group right okay so you buy and this is no shade because do you know what i fucking get it like there was lesbian there's lesbian couples on this facebook group um what was the quality of sperm like well i'll show you some of them were like like no teeth and stuff oh my god like look hi everyone i'm a sperm donor from london um i don't have any stds i can donate healthy sperm in and around london in and around if you want my healthy sperm send a message my fertility quality is high so wait how much do you pay for the sperm no you don't pay they don't they donate the sperm what why why is he doing that so this company was called inseminmate and there's girls so this the the facebook group is sperm donors uk

okay and you go on sperm donors uk and there's girls on there like hi i am ovulating i am in bristol i'm ovulating in the next three days yeah and then the guys under it comment like here's my number and then what happens this this face do you think they ever think fuck that's just yeah there's 35 000 people on that that to me is much more like hinge hinge with babies involved and like a risky type of hinge like a like a russian roulette hinge like you go so so they the people that comment they may probably meet up and then what would they do give them a give them a cup of the sperm well so that that inseminate kit that i was looking at you ever thought of that fantastic yeah so i was reading i got into a rabbit hole on uk sperm

donors and basically they can either have sex with you some of them are i only have sex because that's what they're getting that's what they're getting out of it fair enough and some of them are they go and tug themselves right in the into the pot how long does it live though is there not a temperature for sperm to live like a body uh i don't know but then on that in seven mate there was another there was a website that can ship you sperm what anywhere in a freezer thing and it was telling you how to defrost the sperm surely that doesn't work no it does there was a girl i was watching then on tiktok whose partner is in prison and you are allowed to send your partner your sperm and she'd got pregnant while he was in prison in the not in the uk it was in america yeah

they do also you could probably use your dad's sperm in america like the fucking weird out there So, I was like, well... But there's women out there just having normal sex when they're ovulating, struggling to get pregnant. Yet, we get people getting pregnant by sperm that has been shipped, DHL, then it's been defrosted, then it's been... And we're still getting...

It's just madness, isn't it? Yeah, wild. So, have a look at that, because that... Sounds real. If you've got nothing to do, have a look at that. Right, okay. Someone this week, Lauren. This is a good question.

Do you know what, girls? i feel like this is a good fucking first date question to get to know someone to get to know someone someone this week has won 55 million pounds in the uk on the euro millions a lot of money isn't it lauren you've just won it and it's now gone transferred into your bank account your debit card's in your hand right now what are you doing i am quitting every job i've got including in the podcast um i am telling everyone that i had to be nice to for money to fuck off i am telling everyone what i really think of a lot of things um i am ringing two people that i was a patient coordinator for at maya that i fucking hated

i am ringing a few old bosses i could do that now though to be fair uh but yeah no i'm quitting every job that i've got now all of them right and where are you driving to what are you doing i've not thought about that i'm going somewhere i'm going on holiday i'm off i'm getting a private jet soon i'm getting a private jet i'm getting home no actually you just go to selfridges and buy a suitcase i'm going home and i'm i'm buying a house i'm looking for a house that's what i'm doing that's one of the first things i'm doing i'm going on right now i'm buying a i'm buying a fucking huge house where would it be um i don't i'm happy where i live i love where i live you want me to london or anything no move country no i'd have a few everywhere i'd buy a huge mansion

here um and then i would also get a private jet and i would get my mates all your friends yeah and we'd all go and stay in like an island like when the kardashians go and stay in like a proper private island would do that um and i'd say to mum what what do you want what do you fancy love yeah it's the house I'm getting that I'm ringing I'm quitting every job

I've got would you not build a house for you I feel like I've not got time I'm just I want the house for now

maybe later with my other millions and millions but with this like 55 million and the way you could invest that you're never gonna

ever it's never gonna go for life you're never gonna run out everyone would you tell anyone you'd won it no

what would you say that like someone died I'd tell like my family and friends I wouldn't they wouldn't answer the question

no one's fucking business I'd tell like my friends and family I wouldn't put it on Instagram or anything like that I'd just crack on Do you remember there was a girl that was like And then if someone asked you I'd tell them The youngest Euro millions winner And she was like 16 or something

And she said it ruined all It was the one that said it didn't do well For like she just spunked the money up the wall I would I don't think I would I think I'm pretty switched on like that What would you do? Buy a house

Have loads of plastic surgery Anything different to what or ashley's thinking one of them already got quite a lot of money so uh but yeah tell loads of people to fucking do what i'm thinking about it there's loads people i could tell now to do one i don't need to win the lottery should we start a list of people we've got this should we write should we tell everyone from the top from the top i can think of loads of people yeah do you know what like that is a life-changing amount of money i feel like i'd want to help other people yeah like like there's a lot of people like i'm always on instagram and stuff

and i see stuff and i'm like oh my god i always used to say um that what i would do is i would get and this is really weird and you are not going to agree with this because it's just not your vibe and you're not interested in this type of thing dogs yeah fuck off i would get a massive massive like um do you know farm thing no you know like a tour bus okay and i would drive around and i would get stray animals into the tour bus and when they get in there's a station where they can get all washed up and fluffed up and cleaned and then they can sit so nice and cozy and be fed things and i would go around the streets getting stray animals getting them in and snuggling them up all warm yeah i would do that with dogs i'd go around different countries and i just

i would steal people's dogs yeah yeah but is there any stray animals really not in the uk i'd have to go somewhere else but i would literally go and i'd be like come on i'd get them in i'd give them a bath i'd clean them up i'd put them wrap them up all warm and i'd say here's a treat are you gonna get a dog when your house is finished you're on holiday too much you're not allowed are we still talking about the million on my real house i don't know that the real house oh no i don't know just because i want to rescue straight doesn't mean i want one in my house saskia was playing with a hamster at the weekend and she came home i killed mine when i was little by mistake everyone's got a traumatic hamster it was traumatic yeah i forgot to put any water in it and it died

i fried my friend's slime while she was in the toilet and then the next week she was like oh gizmo's dead i was like gizmo's been farting sperm but fucking sperm not sperm slime always anyway let's move on no i'm not into pets in my house i haven't got time that's literally the only reason i haven't got fucking and dog who wants to go out in the pacing down rain with the mac on in the fucking wet and then wiping the doggy's paws no i don't want to do that Anyway, we will be back after the break with what's on our tits and slutty Susans. But first, are you a loyal listener of this podcast? Nippity-tuckity.

Do you set an alarm on Wednesday and Friday ready for the new releases? Do you enjoy them? Do you laugh through them? Do we make you happy? If we do, make everyone else happy as well by telling them about us. Spread the news. Spread the podcast. Go on your WhatsApp now.

If you haven't done it already, you really should have. Yeah, share, share, share, baby, share the love. Okay, we're back. Welcome back. Lauren? Yep. Tits, what's been getting on your tits this week? Cyclists.

oh mate they are they are bellends they actually think they own the road there isn't and in a group in a group oh they're like a group of bellends yeah that honestly there are different people in this world there are narcissists there are you know lovely people there are selfish people there are cyclists now number one they're usually men oh yeah they're always too abreast why does that mean means this the cycle two next to each other which is illegal oh is it absolutely is yeah it's illegal do you have a dash cam on your car no it just see me doing really weird shit all day i can't risk that i always have one on my car because i always think cyclists would do it yeah so i the other day was parking up at school and i was

parking it's hard to explain i was kind of parallel parking into somewhere that wasn't a parking bay but i was then going to reverse back right yeah i do that so i was parking to a zigzaggy bit but i was then the car behind me was about straightening up was about to leave and i would then anyway so he thought i was just parking on the zigzag before the crossing and my window was down because it's boiling did he shout at you yeah he went you can't park that and i thought instead of explaining i just put my head out and went well i just have because i thought now i'm gonna let him think i'm staying here so i stopped then because i thought no and then he went you're not allowed and i said fuck off i know um which isn't very kind really and then my mum said that

One did it the other day to her, got next to her and said, you were too close to me, put your window down. And he said to her, you need to read your highway code. And she said, she just went, oh my God, thank you so much. I will spend this evening and tomorrow evening reading the highway code. Thank you. Do you know what I do to people that like that or that get road rage? Do you wave?

Oh, yeah. And smile. I go, oh. I do a wave like this. Yeah. So when they go, are you fucking bugging? I go like this.

Yeah, I know. And they, you can see them getting angry. It's men. It is. And do you know what? Those angry motorway drivers that get right up your arse

and you've got fucking kids in the car and you're like, excuse me. I just find cyclists just an irritating breed. Yeah, they are. I think they're odd.

Why would you want to do that anyway? Nah. Why would you want to go cycling on a road? It's cold. It's dangerous. Do you know what I saw actually the other day?

A lady cycling with probably a three or four-year-old on the back and neither of them had a helmet on. That scares me. That's not okay. I still think baby carriers are weird. What, on the back of them? On the front and the back.

When you're walking, I've never had one with me. I had a sling around the house, but you know when people go on hikes and they have the baby strapped to the front or back? Imagine if it fell off. Imagine you fell. You slipped, you would squash the baby. All my friends have them, but I cannot.

My friend, we went for a walk, and it was like a big walk, and he had the little one strapped to his front. it's really common you know or strapped to the back and they have their little legs dangling

what if he missed and slipped and squashed the baby you put your hands out though don't you or what if he tripped backwards I've just

I've never used one I just think I'm really something about me really scares me and when you see cyclists with that back bit with the kids in imagine if a car

went in like what the actual fuck what the fuck I mean I'm sure I do things that people are dangerous I don't know I can't think what

but like I just feel like that's excess well they say like you're not meant to put your kid in the car seat with a coat on oh my god

I remember when Theo was little I got trolled for that once she's got a coat on oh honestly I hope you've got nothing

to do right we've got to talk can I just say something really quickly what the mortgage rates it's so bad isn't it

wow like honestly on a genuine series not how are people coping because people will really be struggling mine went up by I think 400 pounds

now some people I'm really lucky that yeah it was really annoying but i'll be all right ring fence that actually food shop 100 quid a week yeah what if people genuinely cannot afford that like how that has bothered me this week and how wild that like it's your house as well yeah and all you're paying is more interest i just i just worry i have actually this week my friend came back from holiday and hers had gone up by 600 pounds she had a letter

from 600 a month to 1000 is there anything she can do not really she can fix in might get it a bit lower but i was like some people genuinely like she'll be fine but some people really but is that going to struggle what do we do forever do you know it's going to come down a little bit but it's never going to go back down to what it was because i think our rates were actually unrealistically low we were all living in a very lucky situation um from what i've been told but i just think like it worries me and what how people are surviving and how scary that is if you've got kids and stuff oh yeah i just found it scary so that is absolutely i hope everyone's okay out there also school uniforms so expensive do you know my school for your school is insane

like you don't have to get anything branded if you don't want like because for the people that maybe can't you don't have to get anything branded i bet sasky's is a fucking pain you're ready to hear how much a blazer is go on 130 quid are you joking the whole uniform is probably gonna cost about 600 quid i'll tell you why that is because they think you're rich fuckers because you're all getting taken the piss out of because they think the silly bastards will pay this for every turn how much should I bet they sit there how much should we charge

for a blazer 130 quid and then they go Steve goes should we say 100 and then the head teacher goes fuck it

say 130 they'll definitely do it they've got loads of money fuck it say 150 go on let's charge them bastards 150

you rich bastards what should we say for a skirt 50 quid I bet that's what they do it's bad isn't it and you're all going to pay it because

what were you meant to do they're taking the piss out of you they are taking I know no thing at school you can have whatever so it doesn't have to be branded

as long as it's the right colour it can be whatever you can get it from Tesco if you like if you want or you can obviously have the uniform stuff it's up to you

and there's no like strict rules no they're fantastic like that like really really good and that after school club thing you fucking lucky bitch yeah what

do you not have an after school club no at all you have to go like for a separate one that's weird they said that reception children

will be too tired by three o'clock so they need to go home and I was like yeah but she's I'm tired yeah but I'm tired yeah nursery's longer than that

I don't put her in that often but I do when I need to she's in it today if I have to they love that she loves it yeah

more fun than and they give them they give them a fucking dinner actual dinner no something like you know what

she pretends she hasn't because she wants a second so she'll come out and I'll go did you have something for your tea and she'll go

had a little bit of something and I'll say what's like the worst lie that she's ever told she doesn't lie really no i don't feel like she lies when i was little i told everyone at church that my mum was pregnant with our second with with a little sister told everyone everyone um and she had no idea that i told this lie and then eventually one of our one of the friends said oh congratulations liz i believe you number one like she was like I think she's like 45 so she in her mind hadn't planned anymore at

this point not like Courtney Kaye oh yeah yeah that just sorry to jump jump again but Courtney Kaye right so fucking good for her we were saying a few weeks ago like Lauren was saying she feels a bit pressured into rushing and getting another baby out of the way because of my age we did talk about like eggs and declining and unfortunately it is a fact that is the fact of life but guys like don't just settle like look at that situation she is literally what is it that someone said you can be in the you can be the right destination something anyway yeah she's 44 she's just got married she looks happier than ever and she got pregnant naturally as well did she and she's pregnant like that woman whatever anyone wants to say about whoever whatever had however many years

with scott you know it was really weird everyone wanted them to get back together and i'm thinking why he treated her like shit she had three kids with him we treated her like shit left her to it a lot of the time yeah and everyone was like i miss her with scott what no and she's met travis yes it is a little bit of intense intense but she's happy she's now pregnant at 44 so whatever position you're right now you've got another 10 years in us lauren exactly so whatever position you're in now if you're thinking oh shit let her be the inspiration can i just say life really does begin at 30 do you think yeah i've been yeah yeah it does you feel so much less pressure i'm so much more like i won't put up with any bullshit and i quite actually would have loved

to be child free in my 30s for a few years that'd be fucking fun yeah you got your money you can do your own thing you can do exactly what you want so girls if you are out there living that life just enjoy it because it will come when you're ready what do you think of the submarine? I

I think the British media is very clever don't know if anyone follows Katie Hopkins agree with her or disagree with her I used to think she was a dick and either I've now turned into a dick or I don't know i can't like it now the covid shit she said was funny it was funny and the holly you need to watch

the holly thing she did so she is funny um and it's kind of the kind of thing that she's saying she says sometimes when there's something big going on in the uk it's a distraction it's a deflection they want to and the submarine it's funny how much we've gone on about that at the same time as philip scofield and a few other bits and bats so what what a lot of people are saying is it's the deflection it's everyone now look at the submarine i mean the submarine was fucking wild it took a lot of time in my mind

you were really concerned about that submarine I was obsessed with the submarine she was really like you really got under the skin every day woke from my eyes she'd message in the group

and she'd be like terrible about the submarine isn't it like yeah you said that yesterday no but like that would be the worst way of dying they imploded I believe yeah but

why would you do that one guy like was a crazy bastard and he'd like gone to space and stuff as well so I think he was just like an adventurer

and do you know what if you're an adventurer then you live by the sword you die by the sword you live and die doing what you love but the one where there was a very rich man

and his son and I thought that was sad because do you know what all I thought was the woman that's now not got a son or a husband that's all I thought about

but do you know what really annoyed me that a lot of people because they paid for this trip and because they were rich were kind of like dissing them for that like well

idiots more money than sense I thought oh are you jealous jealous people if people have got too much money nobody likes it do they

they're like nasty to them but 250 grand that trip cost them each each so the man with his son

half a million half a million to implode like that's a lot of money isn't it would you ever go on a submarine no and I'm not even interested in looking

at the Titanic I've watched the film it's like when men want to go on motorbikes I don't understand that I don't get it for what to increase your risk of death

and also like your life insurance wouldn't cover you so you silly fuck you're gonna go and die and then and leave everyone in debt. Yeah.

I do find that weird. I am very sad. Some people died on them. Some people died on a rollercoaster last week as well. On a rollercoaster? Where? In Sweden. But then again,

you can't go your whole life just like not doing anything. Do you remember there was those kids that got their legs off at Alton Towers? Yes. They were hanging there, weren't they? And they just had to have a leg taken off.

No, I think that they smashed into something. and then there was also um oh this is just this is why i'm like i'm off all this stuff do you remember that young girl that was on a school trip and she was in the rapids no a theme park down south and she went under and died imagine your kid going on a school trip well what you meant to do they'll never let them go on a school trip i just it's that's what life is that it's like what are you going to do but we can't talking about the Alton Towers I follow one of the girls Leah um on Instagram who got her leg off on that accident at Alton Towers and she is so inspirational like she just she gets her leg out like she's really open about her experience um I think she's

getting married this year but I would love to get her I wonder if we could get her on just to like ask her what happened ask her like how she's turned around how how she deals with that because that do you know we sit here could happen anytime we sit here and like we were talking with claudia in our um last week about you know that we beat ourselves up over our bodies and this and that but imagine that kind of thing i mean i'm sure she probably thinks like you worry about what like your nose looks like i've not got my leg anymore you know it would give you a lot of perspective someone like that wouldn't it make you really realize how really lucky we all are horrendous i um i worked at a hospital and a guy was at the races with a girl and it was their first date and

he walked out in front of a taxi and got hit and his leg came off and he was staying in the hospital for like a very very long period of time she visited him every single day and i think they ended up getting married that's really cute on the first day and she like helped him there's worse first dates than that she'd like helped him recover

like with his like getting back walking again and stuff like that that's a lovely romantic story if you know who that is

let us know yeah so anyway live life to the full guys because you just don't know but don't go on roller coasters or submarines

no live it to the full bar school trips submarines motorbikes cyclists because then you're just a twat

and what else did we say other drivers you've got to be careful of oh it's not them it's not you I'm worried about

it's the other drivers it's true it's like that's what men say to women look your friend had that car crash the other week she did

god she's lucky to be alive and that again it's other drivers yeah well we're scaring everyone now we're scaring she's probably in the car right now deep and dark anywho

we've got a slutty sue slutty sue slutty sue do you want to read it or shall I I'll do it slutty Susan please keep me anonymous

a few years back i found out my ex was cheating on me could have cried but i thought fuck this go girl and wanted to have the last laugh so i decided to contact my friend for a favor basically i sucked my so-called friend off took a picture and sent it to my then boyfriend followed by a text saying lesson to be learned don't play games with someone who can play them better never heard from him since know your worth girls p.s you're all fucking hilarious and your pod is the best love that so he was already cheating so she sent him a pic of her with a penis in her mouth i know someone who by mistake rang her boyfriend while she was with his friend yeah you got to listen if you're gonna play with

fire we need to toughen up women a little bit we're always the ones that like oh i got cheated on my heart is broken make those boys cry like we need to be a bit more like fuck you right i've got another one here lozza yeah hey girls and lucas congratulations to ashley on your pregnancy oh thank you i heard that lauren's already hoping to be the godmother in words can't wait for the christening love the pod listening to the newest one currently about eating whilst having sex here's a little slow sue for you as expected when i started having sex with my first boyfriend and obviously we went through the honeymoon phase of having it multiple times a day.

It didn't matter where or when. We're going to have to talk about something in a minute. Where or when, etc. And we got into the habit of doing it whilst my family were at home during the day. I was 17 at the time. We were all horny folks. We would have wanked someone off under a blanket

while you're watching TV next to your mum. Yes, we were learning. Faded. We were all at that age, you're just learning, aren't you? And you're like, give it to me. What's this? What can we do? I know, let's try this.

Yeah, you are. You're wild at that time. This one time, my mum knocked on the door and entered without warning. Uh-oh. Whilst we were having sex, offering us donuts. Luckily, we were spooning, so could have easily been disguised as cuddling. but whilst his dick was still inside me my ex accepted the donut and continued to have a conversation with her you wouldn't you just went no thank you oh yes i was mortified please tell

me i'm not the only one the family have walked in mid-sex love you all p.s please keep me anonymous i've been putting the pod on in the background whilst me and my boyfriend do housework so i really don't fancy the awkwardness which could follow and yeah i'm sure like i mean yeah there's been walking ins oh walking ins absolutely it is funny at the beginning when you literally you're at your mom and dad's and you just are getting it where you can get it do all sorts don't you do funny stuff because it's so so new to you and so exciting yeah yeah lucas has just said you can never turn down a glazed ring that's the funniest thing though imagine like you just be like no thank you and let her go but can you imagine if you're like oh yeah i'll have a donut i mean the

sound of that sounds delicious i'd take a donut probably i would right guys get in touch so remember on nip tuck we want you to get your voices heard you can email us at hello at nip tuck hello hello dot com you can also get in touch you can also get in touch via whatsapp so you can send your voice notes your messages your pictures your anecdotes your stories your everything anything anything it's like a group chat send what you want and don't forget we want a five-star review i absolutely love it when you share on instagram what you're doing where you're going where you're watching us where you're listening to us i enjoy that so please do that and it also gets more people on board with us which is amazing so friday we're going to be back

for a bonus episode yeah why are you so weird we will see you on friday guys love you bye Thanks for watching!