NO FOMO - 23. The Rothschilds Are Gonna Flatten The Earth

Episode Date: August 3, 2022

Welcome Back Fomosapiens. This week we talk Conspiracy theories and take a deep dive into Ass Movies along with a bunch of other smart topics. Let's Evolve Together, NO FOMO. Support the Podcast: Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code NOFOMO at MANSCAPED.com!

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. We are on episode 23 of no FOMO. Yes, sir For those of our visual watchers on the youtubes. Tell me I don't look fabulous now I got that we should not have we got the lighting rearranged and I think we all just look we look good Yeah, you know the light was too blown out on the other ones. Yeah, John was the only one who looked good Weird was starting to didn't need the light started causing some inner turmoil between the groups. We decided we had to level up the production a little bit. Yeah, so here we are. Here we are.

We're back. Hot off a little 24-hour trip to Sacramento to play a show. Yeah. And John had an interesting weekend. We'll let him speak about it if he wants to. I'm going to pass on that. I did have one thing that I forgot to mention on the last one. Me and Morg went through a Final Destination moment. Oh, yes, dude. What? On the freeway. Yeah, I didn't hear about this Oh, it was not good. So we were just driving and there's a truck in front of us that has a bunch of pallets of like sheets of wood on top of it

Uh-huh, which always terrifies me. Which you always run through that scenario in your head of you like oh if these came off that would suck And we're literally just driving and we see one go probably 60 feet up in the air and fly off this thing Which always terrifies me. Which you always run through that scenario in your head of you're like, oh, if these came off, that would suck. And we're literally just driving and we see one go probably 60 feet up in the air and fly off this thing. And I'm like, oh, that's up there. And then right as that one hits the peak, like four more go up in the air. Holy fuck. And in complete. Horrifying.

Just no reaction time out of me whatsoever. It basically almost hit me before I decided to swerve at all. Holy shit. And then I look back in the car behind us just With all of them and then that is a bathed up and that's a good fuck Yeah, I mean the fears are real yeah, so those are justified now I mean we both completely froze up, but it's like oh it was one of those things We're like they weren't falling out like a predictable way. Yeah, it's like they're like light Yeah, it was they're all like all flat, and I was just like,

you can't really tell where it's going to go. I think both of us did the exact same thing. I was like, oh. Oh! This isn't good. And then four cars followed the guy off to exit. Yeah, because they all just got dapped up by the stuff. Yeah, you're going to need to... Whatever company you're working for

is getting sued. Yeah, I didn't think about that when something like that happens. You just have to follow the guy Well, yeah, it's their fault. Yeah, however strap that up is fucked. Yeah, that guy's gonna he has the worst guy He's just like For care now so that anxiety I feel every time I drive behind a truck where it just it's strapped down You're like the how does that gonna hold it down? It's all justified. Yeah. Yep. Well now I'm even gonna have more anxiety I'm free. Yeah, it's justified people yep appreciate that um but anyway on we broke a hundred thousand listens overall on the pod yeah which is 11 years 11 years of audio jesus christ that's a lot so shout out

you guys make sure to like comment and subscribe and share that shit yep because we're building a guild we're building a guild we appreciate all the support so far it's been it's been a fun run yeah five stars five stars across the board at least almost 5.1 yeah i think we're actually reaching a little bit over five yeah yeah um other highlights we found a new nickname for garrett it is gogurt i want to know the inception of this because what the fuck i was just thinking we just don't have a good enough one that represents you. A good enough one for me? I like Go-Gurt. I'll say I'm on board with it.

You're kind of long and slim, too. You can get slurped up. That's so fair. If you've got double grip. I'm long and slim and you just love to slurp me up. Yeah. So fair. That's the best name ever.

Yeah. And I just explode in your mouth. Yeah. 4.9 stars now. Depending on your mood, you're like different flavors. And and when i'm melting i just fall right out it falls right out of my mouth yeah uh other than that we got banned off tiktok live for a week because we went live and garrett and john kissed for a thousandth of a tiktok dollar also we did eight other things that you're not allowed to do on there yeah yeah drinking an

open bottle of liquor cursing saying just bad stuff not a lot allowed to do on there. Yeah. Yeah. Drinking an open bottle of liquor, cursing, saying just bad stuff. Not allowed to smoke the vapes on there. We were vaping, which apparently is illegal on there. So we're learning. But we'll be back on Wednesday. Too sexy on there. Yeah. Well, I guess we can announce this now.

Like we plan on doing a live on TikTok. Let's do Thursdays. On Thursday. Yeah. Well, there's a reason I can't. Oh, it's because. Yeah. So Wednesday nights, we're going to be.

We might skip this Wednesday then because I think we're banned until like 11 p.m yeah yeah we're banned for a whole week maybe we'll do we'll figure it out yeah well there's not necessarily gonna be a set schedule for it yeah you'll just get notified go follow us on tiktok and you'll know when we're up but we we also found out this is a big life hack there's a fucking not interested button on tiktok oh how does that work more just bless, I gave him like the nicest little hug after he told me about this. You can, uh, you go to like the send thing. Yeah. So it's not interested. Yeah. So on tick tock, I, dude, I was fucking losing my mind over this cause I don't want to see the dancing videos, but like, I'm going to fucking look if they're there,

if they're there, I'm going to get stuck looking at it. So I like, I went through all the settings and I was like, there simply has to be a way to filter it in the other direction help your own algorithm so if you hit share at the bottom there's a not interested button and then you fucking stop getting the ones so all the related ones that it shows you because you watch one of them will no longer show yes yes so you can you can tailor your own because i was like getting bombarded by these fake skits of overtly racist scenarios. It's like little movie clips. It's almost like a training video of how to do these scenarios. And it would be just like this cop going up.

One of them was this cop goes up to a black kid on a wheelchair. And he's like, where did you get that Xbox? Because the Xbox didn't end up. He's like, oh oh i'm just going to my friend's house to play games he's like well there is a robbery in this area and you're you can match this i'm just like who why is this on here what's the video for i don't know who are they making them for who wants them yeah for the woke why did i get stuck with them yeah you got stuck on woke tiktok but yeah so i mean i fucking love tiktok but it's just i you can never figure out a good way to make it show you what you want.

Yeah. It says it's for you, but this shit ain't for me. Yeah. It's not for me. Yeah. Let's see here. We renamed McDonald's. It's now Mark's house.

Mickey Mark's. Yeah. Mickey Mark's or just Mike's crib. Mike's crib. Michael's. Whatever you want. Michael's. It just sounds better. Yeah. We're just classing it up a little bit because McDonald's is kind of, for me at least in Marks or just Mike's Mike's crib Mike's crib Michaels whatever you want Michaels It's just yeah

We're just classing it up a little bit cuz like McDonald's is kind of for me at least in recent years elevated from the classic Stigma of McDonald's it's no longer that place. So if they're not gonna rebrand themselves, we're gonna rebrand it for ya So now marks, yeah, it's now marks or Michael I remember like legitimately hating on people if they said they like McDonald's. Yeah, and now they got the best burger It's a good place. They got the best best how many times you have it this weekend i feel like you had it of quite a few you had this weekend uh just just the one time you had it on like wednesday when you guys came over to my place and then we got it i think you got it twice that one night we were in sacramento yeah there's a couple of marks in there because we ordered it for breakfast i'm pretty

sure you said you already had it or something oh no i couldn't get it because my phone was oh you couldn't get it that's right yeah dead. Oh, you couldn't get it. That's right. Yeah. Other highlights from the week. So we stayed at the Radisson for our Sacramento show. Holy shit. Fear.

It was the scariest hotel I've ever been in in my life. And let's just say we didn't end up staying there. Yeah. Neither of our keys worked when we got there. And then the room that we thought was his, there wasn't even a handle on it there was there wasn't you couldn't even put a key in it there was this homeless couple that pulled up in the back door and like the lady's feet were like pointed or not her toes were just like busting out to the right and left yeah her feet were straight but the toes was yeah skewed yeah they were and they had a dog that had something it had some sort of disease it was scary looking yeah and

they were like talking to themselves it was so scary yeah the feet were pointed north south but they were going east west and then the guy in the room across from me when i go to my room the doors propped open and he i can just see him showering right there like you can see like the curtain was closed but like you see directly in the bathroom so to have some kind of balls to just shower with the door open at a crack motel. Yeah. The place was horrifying. It was fucked. But, uh, to build on top of that, I am nominating myself for down bad. Okay. Because I woke up, I did stay there the one night. Oh, you did end up staying. I woke up and they don't have anything like to buy in the rooms. So I drank hot shower water because I was so dehydrated

yeah we ended up just uh i just went and stayed with the promoter who booked us because i was like dude i can't go back i can't go back there and he was so fucked up that he ubered back to the hotel not remembering we're supposed to go to this guy's house and stayed at that place by himself yeah and then on top of that um an uber driver fucking farted in the Uber while I was in it and rolled up the windows. No. And checkmated my ass. You're full of shit. Five stars.

Five stars. Five stars. He fucking gas masked you? Dude, I think he thought it didn't smell, but he had the windows up, and I guess I got a shit vortex in the back seat. And I... All right. No longer hungry. You don't want that.

To get into the bulk of today, we're talking about conspiracy theories. We're going to be breaking down some conspiracy theories. Okay. The conspiracy sowed with the smartest podcast on the planet. I do have a quick one that I wanted to start with. I also have a quick one, but you can go first. Cricket Wireless is up front. You think so? I don't have any. I haven't looked it up. There's no evidence. I don't have any evidence, but it is

I don't know anyone with it. I've never met anyone using it. Yeah, it's the biggest front in the world It's got to be and the storefronts they have have you seen like some of them are almost like booth They're fake have you ever tried to go in one you can't they're never open yeah it's it's just a giant mannequins yeah mannequins there's no one in there um this one is actually true but um i just thought it was funny um canada tried to develop gaydar in the 60s no way i swear to god um oh actually a couple countries did but um what they did was they would do a pupil dilation response to sexual erotic imagery. And the Canadian government used it to fire more than 400 civil service workers. No way.

In the 60s. What the fuck? I'd be so fired. So that's just fucking crazy. That's absurd. Probably dilate up. Yeah, I'm dilating. You could show any image, not even sexual, and you'd probably get a gay response.

But I think the main thing with the conspiracy stuff is if they lied to us about the UFOs, I don't think it's fair to not consider half the shit. So that is a good preface for this. Yep. Almost all conspiracies at this point are on board again. If anything that was out is back. After they release all like the ufo documents because that's like the biggest one that was that was like the number one thing yeah

and now it's real and now what else are they hiding if if they're hiding aliens that could be anything yeah okay have you ever seen the list i don't have it on here of like the stuff that used to be a conspiracy theory and then ended up being true like the fake war battles and shit like that well no it's like um like experiments they did on people there's like uh cia stuff that they did like just this whole list of things and like you're reading and you're like yeah i can see why people think that's fucking crazy and then it's like oh it ends up being and then it literally it's just yeah that that happened that happened well you know the uh the spider head movie that was on netflix where they try to control people's willingness to just do anything

Yeah, that was what they and shit when they originally made LSD. That's what it was for. Yeah, they're using it to like control people Yeah, so everything's everything's on tape supposedly why there's fluoride in the water too. Yeah true. That's what they think But fluoride fucks It's good for your teeth apparently. Yeah. Yeah Your teeth health who wants to do this first more you want to run yours I See I got a couple little different angles on this okay this one's kind of just a scary thought that's probably going to happen but also in the same vein so this guy was explaining how ai would take over the world and it's fucking horrifying so the the way it would work so if you created it um it it would it would be able to work without time so like you know how we have

to like learn things it already knows everything yeah so it would this is how it would take over it would um study everyone's responses on the internet to everything and then be able to like counteract the scientist that's like in control of it to get what it wants so it would like simulate your response to anything that it requested it would be able to do like the west world thing like it sees all predictable outcomes yes and then knows so then it knows the proper way to approach it where you'll say the right thing back or you'll yes exactly the way it wants you to so say like it was in a box or something but it needed to become like get a body or whatever it'd be like i could help you guys solve this

problem but i need this and then it probably knows that you're going to say yes to this. And once it gets to that level, you're going to just fuck. Yeah, I'm pretty sure even the, you know, it's still kind of in its infancy in some regard. But like even the technology they have for it now, it has more computing power than like every human being combined. If they were to work on the same problem at the same time. Yeah. And then didn't they already have to turn one off? I think I don't know if they're

hearing they had they made an ai and they had to turn it off after like 20 minutes i wouldn't think i know that did you like i don't know that specific case but the guy that got fired from google for like saying that the the one that they're working on is like has like full-on conscious thought and oh it's the sentient one yeah that's fully sentient and it like they like literally like put them on a leave or whatever and then fired them yeah for like saying something about it yeah so i didn't like that one okay but um so you want to take the reins yeah mine's a lot more in depth okay so brace yourselves so this one started as one conspiracy theory and as i went through it i decided it's another one okay so i'll start as where, where I initially went and then we'll transition.

Your whole process. So this one was the Roman empire never actually fell. Okay. So Rome didn't actually fall in 476, whatever year that fucking was. Instead, it just turned into the Holy Roman empire and then eventually into the Roman Catholic church where the Pope's official title translates to the exact same title that Julius Caesar held back then. So the Vatican is surrounded by formerly Rome, but it's its own city-state. It operates on its own set of laws, everything, money, all that.

And basically what they're saying happened is, is they slowly expanded through other. So this is the cultural epicenter of their control, the church. They also founded the city of London, which is in London. It's a smaller area. It's like Washington, D.C., but in London. So this is a place where the Rothschilds Bank is. And it was founded in the 47 AD by the Romans, um, to give you an insight into the Rothschilds bank. They control every centralized bank for

every country besides China, Iran, Afghanistan, North Korea, Sudan, Cuba, and Libya. What countries are we usually at war with? Yeah. I was like, that encompasses all the countries we usually have. So they own, they control all of the money. They, including ours with the Federal Reserve, they created the Federal Reserve. Yeah. So they're saying that Rome or the Vatican technically controls that because they founded it and they've held power this long. Then they're saying that they also control DC, which is its own city state as well, as well as the city of London, which is his own thing. They're all corporations. They're not technically places. Okay. So DC is the military power of this three headed thing.

DC's flag has three stars on it, which represents three places. Um, DC, the area was technically founded by a man named Francis Pope in the 1800s. Okay. Um, this is where it transitioned from Rome having all the power into the Rothschilds. Okay. Okay. So I've already mentioned that the Rothschilds control all of the money in the world. They also own over 80% of, uh, basically any mining that's important oil. oil, they own over 40% of the world's land.

Okay. The way they did that is by taking over the debts of a country. I said the only seven countries that don't have a centralized bank through the Rothschilds, they would say, okay, we will take on your debt and run your bank for you and all of your money, but you have to give us land. So they own 40% of the world's land. Wait, aren't they doing that in Africa currently? They're like rebuilding African countries, but they own the whole thing. Yeah. So they own land in every one of the countries in the world, except for those. Okay. Okay. Wow. Um, so, uh, when it gets into the Rothschilds, um, with them owning all the money, right? So they control the federal reserve. They set when the gold was still a standard, they? So they control the Federal Reserve.

They set, when the gold was still a standard, they set the price of gold. Yes. That's where it kind of just turned into them controlling everything in the world. So basically at this point, they're saying that the Rothschilds are in control of NATO, which sets laws for the world.

Yep. Essentially. They are also behind, where is it here? They are giving them credit for a global warming crisis, which gives NATO more power because you basically can't do anything in the world because there's this crisis that's going on as well as, um, the Patriot Act, which made it so they can hack into all our data because they control DC because it's his own corporation and the money that goes through that is through

them they said more things that can kind of piece those three things together so those are the three things that the Rothschilds now I'm saying are in control of the Rothschilds are also control the Catholic Church Bank as well and they are the highest rank you can be within that Catholic Church Without being you're supposed to be able you can't do it unless you're a pope and they're basically a pope of that Each one of those places has an obelisk to represent that it's one of the arms of this thing So we have the National Monument in DC and there's another one in the City of London and there's another one in the Vatican The voter fraud that apparently went on in our election

That was traced back to a satellite called Leonardo, which is owned by the Vatican city, which is owned by the Rothschilds. The U S or DC is technically not beholden to the constitution. I don't know if you guys knew this. Um, it has its own set of laws and there was an act in 1873 or something that made us that it could operate under its own separate stuff and that that was kind of took place during Or they exercise that during the 9-11 stuff, right? No, that was in 1800s when we were first being made and that was when the Rothschilds tanked the London They put them in a financial crisis so they could take over all of Europe's money. Holy shit. So it was like right at the same time, essentially this family, which you cannot find out how much money they have owns the world. It's hard to find out how much money

we have. Yeah. They own the world. That's, that's what I got into here. Jesus Christ. Um, what does that mean moving forward? Um, What it means moving forward is that possibly, so this is like the Illuminati part of it. I don't think there is an Illuminati. I think it's these people. So pretty much they're just They control almost every country's money and the only countries that aren't

on that list are the ones that are always at war against for some reason. So we're all sheep. Yeah, I think we're being, yeah, just run by that. I wonder what the... You guys should have seen the fucking... So on regular Google, I ended up having to fact... Like everything that was like a collection of this information,

I went back and I fact-checked on other things. But anything that was like a collection of this information was not on any kind of normal website. One of them was on a sound cloud of a song, the description of the song and it was written out. I was being censored out. Yeah. Cause being, I was like, what the fuck? And I'm like reading this. I'm like, why is this on here? And then I'd go back and check all the stuff that it said. And it's all true. Wow. I was like, so I'm, I'm going to say this. Okay. and i mean this from the bottom of my heart if i have a heart attack or if john overdosed on heroin or something crazy happens after this

it's not true yeah i was don't repeat any of the things i'm gonna say and don't go to the website i was just gonna say i feel like this one's gonna be now on a hit place on our head i guarantee you this is going right right to the top like if this episode gets removed from spotify that'd be crazy that would be so good you imagine that would be the least and we all end up dead in some crazy group uh drug party that they try to claim it is but we really got fucking spiked yeah the holy shit most mid podcast on Spotify gets fucking banned figuring out the Ross show and murdered yeah fuck John what did you what have you just done to it is it not kind of gnarly that we don't know about that bank thing though well it's like seems like something everyone should for sure know about and like I've heard you've heard the Rothschilds a million times

oh they control everything whatever but you don't really know anything about it. Like, no joke, look at this list. This is a list of all the banks that they control. Jesus. And those aren't like, oh, like Wells Fargo in San Diego. Those are like the central bank of every country. It says the central bank of every country. It's not good.

How is that allowed? There's just ways to work around it, I'm guessing. Did you also know that the Federal Reserve is technically a corporation as well, and we don't control that, and that the IRS is basically a military for the Federal Reserve? Like to do their, like, recoup their money and shit? To make sure that they don't lose their money. Like they don't have an armed portion of it,

but it's like they're fucking debt collectors. Yeah. Yeah I was just reading something literally this morning about how the Federal Reserve is basically like just a giant corporation. Because they set the price of money based on nothing that the president can do or say

or that the Congress can do or say. It operates independently entirely. Technically there's some like board of governors that's supposed to be in charge of it. Yeah. But they're like, there's no way that they're actually. And then I didn't know that DC was not, it's a corporation? I did not know that. It's a corporation.

I did not know that. Where the White House is where our entire government operates in. That's fucked. Something's going on. Something's up. Something's going on. We might not be able to put our hand on it right now yeah i'm not sure that us three in this room right now we're gonna figure this one out but i think if the there's nothing to really figure out we're getting we're getting just dominated yeah there's something to take away from it if you ever think you can do something yeah you really can't yeah like if you think

that march for whatever is gonna make a difference no yeah no it ain't happening the banks are controlled by one family yeah what the fuck all of them i wonder what what do you think the person who's like at the top of that family is like trying to do just like them oh make um even more gazillions of dollars it's not about money at that point. I mean, global domination. They control the world. Yeah, you...

Oh, I guess they just control the world. You're trying to get those last seven countries. At that point, yeah, they're just trying to maintain global domination. That's just what they're doing. And to do that, you just need more money. You can do whatever the fuck you want. So, we're going to battle with the Rothschilds. Yo, here's a better question.

Is there an application to join the family? Can we become the Rothschilds? You just gotta look... Can I with the Rothschild. Yo, is there is here's a better question. Is there an application to join the family? Can we become the Rothschild? You just gotta look can I become a Rothschild? Yeah, do we know about the family tree? Yeah, do they have any daughters our age or anything like that? Um apparently The what I learned about the family tree is there was like the main guy He had five kids and they all set up the original banks in like five countries and then those expanded So this was like a plot this this thing has their estimated uh wealth at over 500 trillion dollars but if you own everything i guess there's not really a number well yeah and literally the scariest part is the amount of like resources they own like 80 of the oil% of like minerals that you can get from the ground like it's like a crazy number of it

and they have 40% of the surface area of the planet owned by My god the Rothschilds fuck yeah That's fucking insane. I'm gonna come in. I'm gonna get a new laptop though and throw this yeah Okay, I have this link to me yeah that turned into your burner laptop i bet there's a flag somewhere on all of our three laptops because i've been on the dark web for this podcast we're trying to take over the rothschilds mine's safe so far garrett's got weird porn of searches hey come on that's just fact come on now well i'm scared for sure yeah

no i'm i'm pretty worried i just thought of a fun question. Just going off conspiracies. How would you, as a simpleton, try to explain that the earth isn't flat? That it isn't? That it isn't. Like, try in your best way with your current knowledge to explain it to someone. So if I went and tried to do it before I watched, like, the videos of people proving it, how would I prove it? Yeah. videos of people proving it how would i prove it yeah i think i think i remember thinking like get a telescope like a super strong one and just look straight and try and if you could see like

well yeah i mean it has to be you can see like the pyramid of giza from here then it's like okay it's flat but if you can't and i think that's like if you can see out into outer space if you just looked straight wouldn't you be able to see the entire fucking world? Well? No, I think the problem with that is um There's so much shit in the air that at a certain point You can't see anything at all because there's so much how can we see the frickin Milky Way because there's nothing up Like there's no interference up in the air Like are they all the particulates sit down low like pollution and stuff so you wouldn't be you wouldn't be able to see straight why wouldn't you be able to see through particulates it's it's like fog like imagine fog or something or um like uh what's the word for it well i know i know the way

they do prove it like the simplest one i've seen is like they put two posts in the ground like pretty far away and then put a laser and then measure it doesn't post and it's and it's up it's on the second angled up how did that shit become so big when it happened i don't understand okay like even obviously before there was any knowledge that would be who the fuck would think we're on a giant sphere but like why do people still continue to like vehemently believe in this whatsoever it doesn't't even like, what is like, what is the big secret here? The, the people who advocate for the flat earth do like, if there wasn't science, they do a really good job of explaining all this stuff.

Yeah. No, they're good. Like the way that they talk about like how the sun is actually not that far away and it just goes in a circle and yeah, like the Antarctic around us kind of thing and all that stuff. like they do a good job of selling it if there wasn't science like if no one knew anything yeah if we started over like planet wise and they were like the smartest people and they started explaining that we would believe that for a long time until science well much like religion did a good job

of explaining things until we've had science as well yeah hey don't get me wrong though in 2019 there's like a good 45 50 seconds where i thought the earth might be flat i remember we were watching i'm not surprised you don't still think it is you are the type of person that i would i would believe it is yeah that stuff would work on you there's a reason you keep bringing it up yeah i love it you see him even when we were talking about the ways to disprove it he went like yeah he's like actually would that work he's trying to disprove us proving that yeah well you know there's particulates in there yeah well lasers can go through that so yeah wait did you guys know that it's not. Well there's particulates in there. Yeah, well, lasers can go through that, so.

Wait, did you guys know that it's actually not like a perfect circle though? It's actually like a weird fucking rock shaped. Oh yeah, because of the water. Underneath the water it's all weird. Yeah, and I guess, uh, I'm gonna fuck this up, but it's like rotation makes it oblong because... The oblong. Right? Something like that, dude.

Yeah. It's like a weird oval. Well yeah, I guess oval Looks like a rock I could see it not being a perfect circle With the water yeah if you think about it There's like massive valleys But like is that just because of the That's just where the gravity

Like pushes it together Yeah it's something to do with that Some smarter guy knows this shit The pull of the gravity keeps it into that shape Yeah We're smart as fuck We're too good at this I'm glad we fixed all those

Yeah we just solved all that shit I've got just an interesting one here I like that Bring down the intensity I'm scared for sure Have you heard of anything about the Denver airport And the weird shit that people think May or may not be going on there? I have not.

And then the ideas behind it. So the Denver airport opened in 1995, and it took a year longer than expected, and it was $2 billion over budget. It's the largest airport in the United States. We've been there, right? Yeah, I've been there a couple times. It's pretty big. right yeah i've been there a couple times it's pretty big um so the first strange thing is that the runways are designed essentially in the shape of a swastika if you look at it from above is this facts did you look it up yeah i looked at a picture of it it's literally like they all go like

it's like shaped like a swastika that's interesting very interesting um you know they claim it's just a coincidence because they're they had to have so many large ones angled in different directions because of the weather. So they would have to, like, shut down the runways because the wind was blowing too, like, hard horizontally. Sounds like a lie. So then as soon as they switch over to the other direction, which I seem to think that that one could easily be disproved. Oh, that sounds like a lie. Yeah. Sure.

Which I seem to think that that one could easily be disproved. Oh, that sounds like a lie. Yeah. So where it gets into the weird shit is that people think it was built by a secret organization. And there's a big marker that is dedicated to the group that funded the entire thing. And the group is called the New World world airport commission and there's a bunch of symbols on it that are associated with the freemasons which are like a which have been like illuminati shit yeah and like the uh the organization itself the new world airport

commission there's no like actual organized thing that anyone can find any information on but all the groups that are apparently in that Commission are like real companies Mm-hmm, but it's just very odd that they called it the New World Airport Commission. You think they're that stupid though I don't know. I don't know and then so a lot of the things It's just like a lot of the things that They've been like there's a lot more but a lot of the things they have been like brought to light the like ceo of the the actual airport like kind of like pokes fun at it and they'll like make like memes and content out of it yeah i'm seeing i'm seeing that right now

yeah um so when they do like construction it'll this one says cool new area to hang out or area 52 yeah dude it's like so they lean into it heavily i fuck with companies that troll themselves yeah it's just so much so another weird thing is it has this like it has this massive uh string of underground tunnels that they i love how i love leading it off with they claim because it just immediately gives you doubt but they claim they claim we're for some new um automated baggage system that didn't require like nearly as many people to like go and like, you know, you see them like driving with the trams of like the luggage. Like it pretty much eliminated that and it would automatically just spit out into the airplanes. Like it would just automatically convey her into the airplanes and they wouldn't have to do it.

But the project got dumped before the airport even opened. And it's been open for like 20 something years and they still haven't even tried to. Got them. wouldn't have to do it but the project got sounds fake dumped before the airport even opened and it's been open for like 20 something years and they still haven't even tried to got them reinstated sounds sketch so they think it's a uh series of tunnels leading to some sort of like underground bunker for the government or potentially illuminati headquarters potentially uh these signs are actually fire yeah they're great one of this one's it has a picture of a cat with tinfoil on his head and says what are we building dude i can't believe we didn't wear fucking hoods for this oh yeah what are we oh we should have foil hats we should have tinfoil hats oh my god

go get some go get some tinfoil hats yeah we need to take a pause go get them we'll go make some right now yeah we have to all right ladies and we're going to take a quick break from the pod for a message from our sponsors at Manscaped. It's officially summertime and everybody talks about looking good for the warmer summer months, but few have the balls to do it. Well, it's time to nut up or shut up and take the easiest steps to looking sexy this summer by using Manscaped. Manscaped's ultra smoothage makes sure you have the proper care for down there, and their Boxers 2.0 gives you the perfect stage to show off the new look. The Ultra Smooth Package is a specialized three-step groin shaving kit to help you buff, protect, and smooth your most sensitive areas. I'm talking Crop Shaver Razor, Crop Exfoliator, and Crop Gel.

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Yes. Okay. But yeah, after John just buried us all, we needed something to make sure the government couldn't control our lives. Yeah, we need to get the list away. Yeah, we had to block the list from our head. Okay, so back to DIA, Denver International Airport. So we've got the weird tunnel system, right?

Yes. Do we know where those go? I mean, they're just under the airport? We don't know. It's a massive system of tunnels because you've got to think it goes to every single spot where an airplane would be parked. And this is the largest. It's at least as big big as the airport Yeah, as far as we know and then you know they convene in a giant like

Room underground where the it would have liked in the central like luggage filtering system or whatever It's starting I think it's starting to be poison yeah the, the government just hit us. Yeah, they just hit us hard. Just raid us down. So, yeah, we don't know, and it's never once been used for the purpose that it was claimed to be built for. What has it been used for? Nothing. It's been inoperational since before they even opened the airport. Apparently the testing for the automated baggage system just failed before they even opened the airport, and they've never used it.

So, odd, right? So what do they lead to where do they go perhaps some sort of underground bunker for the new world order or the united states government um as the story goes when it was first being built oh this is this is this is great so it goes to they they lead to five underground buildings that are not connected to the airport and they're not being used in any capacity and so these buildings uh were somehow built incorrectly and then instead of demolishing them or taking them apart and like reusing the materials or whatever they just buried them under the ground oh I did hear this so there's just five empty buildings that have never been used for anything and they just buried them

so all the tunnels lead to five empty ginormous buildings which is fucking odd that have never been used for anything it kind of sounds like this is like the biggest form of like a doomsday prep right like a mass a doomsday prep. Right?

Like a mass scale doomsday prep. Right? Like that one where they make the big boat and there's water everywhere. I forget which movie that is. What? Never mind. What? Noah's Ark? No.

What's the one with the big ass boat that all the billionaires get on? Who the fuck is in that? Sounds awful. Anyways, dude. It's the end of the world. Shut the fuck up. But we're blocking out all the fucking... But people were saying, like, what better place to put, like, a underground, like, kind of place like this than, like, an airport where people could easily get in and out.

It's, like, the biggest airport ever, right? Yeah, you could get there. You could get there easily. And it could intake tons of... Good congregation. Tons of... Facilitate tons of flights in and out. Just so much.

So, interesting there. And then, like, the last just really odd thing is the giant horse statue that's out near the runways. It's this giant. The blue horse? 32-foot tall, 9,000-pound statue called Mustang. And it's been nicknamed Blucifer because of its red glowing eyes that everyone thinks symbolize the devil. It's red glowing eyes that everyone thinks symbolize the devil. Apparently, it just symbolizes the father's neon light shop that he ran as a kid or something. Bullshit.

Bullshit. Complete bullshit. Nice try. The weirdest part about the horse is that the guy who made it actually died. It killed him, basically. Oh, yeah. Didn't it fall on him or something? It fell on him and severed a massive artery in his leg, and he died while making it.

Blucifer strikes again. And his children were the ones that eventually finished it. But it's a creepy-looking fucking horse. They finished it? They finished it. Why would you finish the thing that killed your dad? That's what I'm saying. So there's just a lot of...

Because Blucifer made him. Because Blucifer, dude. There's a lot of mystique behind all this weird shit. And then not to mention there's, like, massive murals of, like, people being, like, villages being burned and people with like gas masks like walking like like Corralling like huge groups of children like this is like on the walls as you're walking through the airport It's a lot of just weird ass shit man this whole shit's a conspiracy yep I think the Rothschilds must have built it yeah well they probably they probably did probably did

You said there were Five underground things There's five original Children of Rothschild Shut the fuck up I'm just saying Shut the fuck up I'm just fucking saying Those are their tombs

Dude probably Those are the Yeah The Rothschilds Are gonna flatten the earth They're gonna flatten the earth That's their master plan Title of the episode

Rothschilds will flatten there That one's a Interesting there's just a lot of weird stuff. They just shit's bad. I just don't know what to do about it Do we want to get in do you have more conspiracies or you want to do some fun fan submissions? I have some other I just had some other fun stuff for us. Okay? You want me to do that? Yeah, I was thinking about this one the other day where these with conspiracies or no they're not okay let's just go random fun shit then random fun yeah some random fun shit fun things with the slash fan submissions what's your guys

opinion on the shit shower shave order that's the only way to do it is it here's my thought i don't like taking the shit at the start because then i have to do all the stuff in a shitty smelling bathroom that is that is facts yeah but you can't you can't shit after you shower i i use wet wipes so i feel like it's pretty good i I just... No. I can't argue with you. Personally, I go shave, shower, shit. Here's the thing. If I have to shit within 10 minutes after I shower, I will actually get back in the shower and just rewash part of my body.

Just kind of rinse off. So... But if it's anything longer than that... Does that come down to you being that bad at wiping? No, it just feels like... Or that worried about being clean? I just feel so ultra clean after taking a shower and then that just really kind of takes takes it away Tell you no no shit flows better than a post shower shit

I don't know that is true with the warm air kind of opening you up or yeah, it's like steamed in there Yeah, we're talking about loose buttholes. Huh are we talking about? I mean, it's like you know stuff moves faster with heat. Yeah, so you're talking about loosen up your butthole Yes, basically. Yeah, okay wait, so it's shit shower shave. That's the way you're supposed to it personally I go no I go shave shower shit shave before you shower yeah, I don't like to have the Post-shower shave I like to know that I got all the like shit off foam off. Yeah, I'm going the shaving cream I'm going shave shit shower

shit off. Foam off. Yeah. I'm going... The shaving cream. I'm going shave, shit, shower. Shave, shit, shower? I always shower after I shave. Or shave after I shower. It doesn't make you guys feel bad when you're showering in a shitty bathroom? Like it just smells like fart in there? I mean, I don't always shit before I get in the shower. That is true. If you need to do all three of those

things at the same time, you kind of fucked it. Yeah, what? It's up to you. Like I usually just shitting is its own part of the day. And then I shower and then I shave at some part of the day Put a toilet in the bathroom or in We need a toilet in the shower toilet shower, and then everything's good. No that's against you up Well then the shits just sitting in there with you while you're showering Yeah, you don't want the steam to be right at right in there right then nope you don't want that

I just personally think it should be done a different way. Okay. I don't want to be in a shitty room any longer than it is required. That's fair. Well, we all had

different answers, so I... Did you? What was yours? Mine's... Shave shit shower. Shave shit shower. Okay. Yeah.

I could get behind that. I might try that, actually, because I could deal with the phone being on me while I'm taking a shit. Yeah, I don't like... You just wipe it off, you know. Well, you know oh yeah but then you know it just feels weird ear whatever yeah i like knowing that i'm fresh out the shower that's fair i probably am doing

it wrong now i think about it yeah that's fair well i think showering before you shave too kind of you know gets the pores opened up makes it easier you have like eight facial hairs anyway no there's a 12 he's getting gray hair though which is Yeah, what the fuck why didn't Morgan point that out? I counted him on the plane. He said I had a bunch of gray hairs coming. Oh, yeah, just 13 of where are they? Mostly on the right side, I think the lunar Do you face the moon that way? Yeah, I've switched it up you might be getting lunar lunar hair damage gray yeah yeah full moon it's a conspiracy theory i could go full gray be kind of swaggy yeah okay

uh the other one i have how long do you have to be dating someone before uh if they had like a traumatic injury you could break up with them or couldn't like say your girlfriend like fucking horrible covers she just broke her finger she broke her pinky finger I'm out you mean I know what you mean I know what you mean by this yeah so like something you're dating your girlfriend for like six months four months she let's make it fun five years well what are you saying what's the minimum time where you can't get out yeah yeah like five years it would be fucked up like if you left it was fucked up if you left

them oh it's fucked up like not it's like you'd be like okay I get it I think like anything under a year I think I have heavy grounds to mob out right what's the minimum injury here loss of I'm saying like yeah they lose an arm that's a toughie, dude.

Oh, man. I think it would also entail how much, like, care I would need to be providing. Because I have to give up my whole life to, like, take care of them now. Like, and I've only needed them for, like, a year. Like, who knows if this was really going to work out anyway, sweetheart. Wait, no. So let's just say it's just the arm. Let's play a couple scenarios here.

Okay. Just one arm. I mean, I don't think you would just be out if it was just an arm. Like, you're like, I'm... Okay, that's fair. How about leg? See, that's where it gets into taking care of territory. Right leg off.

To the point where it's, like, can't even throw, like, a... It's not, like, at the knee where you could throw another leg on it. Like, she's got to be chaired up. Yeah. She's hopping. She's got a foil leg she's just hopping i'm staying i'm staying you're staying no like what at what point would you be like say it was like four months oh yeah no i'd be like i'm out yeah i'd say for something it's too much to be

like just now dating and dealing with like i just can't i can't do it yeah i think anything if it's something devastating that i have to like put work into i think if it's under a year it's you have to wait it out a little bit it's but it's fair oh you definitely can't do it like right after it happens you have to put a couple weeks in oh yeah yeah put in your two weeks notice you have to have enough time to think up the reason that you're at like a different reason to break up with them put in your two weeks notice without them knowing yeah yeah and then you come to him with like hey you know it's just something i've been thinking about for a really long time like way before this way before last wednesday yeah way before the accident oh that's that's good that's tough i mean yeah i

think if it's over a year it depends like i think a year is a good everything paces a little differently you know a year for some people is like they haven't even said i love you yet or something but like you know i think what if you said i love you yeah then i think you're you're in it you're stuck you're stuck you cut off your fucking arm let that be a fucking lesson save that shit jay trying to poison our brains okay replace this is good replace one word in a movie title with the word ass. What is the plot now? So the way we're going to do this is you say your movie title and then we're going to try to guess the plot.

And then you already have one. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I have one for this. Just saying. Okay. So Jay start.

Ass club. So it's fight club. Yeah. It's fight club, but with ass. So it's a bunch of people who only who get together and just fuck each other in the ass Secretly, secretly. It's a secret club. No, it's a group of people that are trying to grow the biggest dump truck That's what I was going for. You're going for? So this would be the girl remake of Fight Club Okay, so they all get together and do butt workouts. It's a bunch of girls who have a secret like butt workouts and the first rule is don't talk about how you got your ass bigger. You got to work your way virtual don't tell anyone. Yeah, yeah Oh, I love that's a good movie. Okay. I've got one okay the silence of the ass

Sounds a little am okay. I'm gonna keep the murder plot here But it's like a weird take on Human centipede and he just likes to fucking sew people's asses shut. Okay, I like that. And so you can no longer... Oh, no, no, no. He puts a... Installs a fucking...

A muffler. No, not a muffler. A silencer on your ass. I like that. He installs a silencer on your ass so farts don't make any noise, but you could still use it correctly. Okay. I'm thinking more of like a like a bad superhero movie and it's like the villain's backstory is like his dad died because someone farted and like

scared him off a cliff or something and so he's going on a thing like anyone who farts he's just murdering the population of people who fart and then there's like a superhero who could be like ass man ass man he comes in yeah i like that okay it's a guy with incredibly like a he has so much flatulence it's an issue and it's his lifelong journey to not fart so much okay okay much more wholesome uh can you go a little bit closer or just tilt it towards you a little bit there you go there we go okay um here we go here we go more okay just called ass but it's morbius same movie same exact plot everything's exactly the same yeah i had a couple like that it was gonna be a top gun ass top ass just top gun ass just ass

just because it's ass instead of maverick it's called yeah top gun maverick ass maverick's ass ah yes yes wait was that movie shit no it was good i haven't seen it it was i haven't seen it i swear on my i've heard it was really good that's why i was like oh did you not like it yeah i know i swear on my fucking life it was i thought it was you see it i saw it with isaac and it was good yeah i went into it thought i thought it was gonna be fucking a poop pancake no i heard it was great i heard it was really good yeah it was good good to hear yeah garrett go ahead um let's see so it's get out but it's get ass morg's uh no do you know the movie i'm talking about yeah i know morg's high school documentary the story of morgan in high school no you get you gotta know the main movie is Get Out I know that and I'm telling you what mine is my definition for Get Ass would be

the documentary of Morgan Bungess being a virgin until he's 19 I like that and it's long it's like a four hour trilogy the doctor in this movie instead of implanting white minds into black people

basically he makes people miniature and puts them in people's asses and they live in their ass forever wow that was a great taste that's good but this one actually makes a little bit of sense here so it's a crazy family but instead of transplanting brains they look for the people with the biggest dump trucks and they switch and they switch it out for their own their whole family So they all got super thick dump. That's kind of a similar plot. Yeah, they just want black bodies. Yeah. Yeah Jay I've got I've got one if we all go. Okay. I've got one just off top Yeah, let's go deeper into this because it's good every ass all the ass all at once

That's a good title Every ass all at once what's that plot gonna be that'd be a hard plot to do dude i've got a good pretty good grasp on what it's about go for it all right so you can you know how she can jump like into any version of herself or whatever i haven't seen that one unfortunately okay well it's like a it's like a metaverse movie where she can like transport herself into any of the infinite metaverse versions of herself. Okay. So with this one, you basically just instantly teleport yourself back to any time you got some ass.

Oh, you could revisit. Interesting. You could revisit any time you got ass. Yes, yes. Oh, that's nice. That's a good one. We could make that. We could make that a movie, bro.

Every ass, all the ass, every ass? Every ass, all the ass, all at once. All at once. There you go. Yep That's the episode title for sure it has to be yeah, I can't think of any more good ones That's gay. We don't to force it. Yeah, okay. I got it um ass and furious same movie Same all ten of them are exactly the same, but they're just called Ass and Furious. Ass-terception.

Hmm. It's like basically like Magic School Bus and they just go into asses. What's an inception? Yeah. Okay. You can... Yeah, I kind of like that. Are you trying to say that the plot has to be, I just have to work plot into that inception? No, so you want to try to guess what I was thinking? Yeah, I know that's open to interpretation. That's what I was thinking. Okay.

Yeah, sure. Um, I guess it's just asception. Yeah. Asperception would be like interstellar. You combine both of them. Yeah.

So it's, it's asception. Yeah. Okay. Um, you can essentially, you just dream about ass all the time. I don't fucking know. I don't fucking know.

It's about a poop within a poop within a poop. Oh shit. Assception. Some guy who has trouble with pooping so he just has he just poops inside of the other poops and then it all comes out at once. Kind of. Or are you trying to incept someone into pooping their pants?

People who have trouble pooping instead of taking lactate you just trick them into pooping in their, man. So we don't have trouble pooping instead of instead of taking lact-aid You just trick them into pooping in their dream and they shit while they sleep Jay you got to play the game Be better at this. Okay Batman vs. Ass man Same movie no That one was ass Batman vs. Assman this might be where Batman dies

this could be a good ending for Batman yeah he finally gets defeated by ass yeah finally gets defeated by ass man it's just two fucking cheeks blasting him it just gets absolutely obliterated by two or he decides to retire the any Mary Mary's yeah he just he settles down with Aspen. Could it be Asswoman? Yeah. Asswoman. Could be. All right.

I mean, you pretty much got it. It's just Batman versus a guy with an absolute dump truck ass. And Batman just gets decimated. Okay, I got one. Pirates of the Caribbean, The Curse of the Black Ass. Oh. Hmm. Hmm.

Ooh, Johnny Depp just rides around in a big ol ass I'm thinking of like a remix of like you know when they're all singing that pirate song when they're about to get hung how does it go yo pirates for me and I know it's not it's now. There's the others one where they're like on the thing all together Hoisin colors or something yeah, but I mean I'm guessing just all the parrots are fucking dumped out basically Let's see what we got here How's the fan submission yeah did you do this yeah oh sick uh hairy ass and the prisoner of ass caban uh harry potter falls in love with a girl uh who ends up going to wizard jail but he can't get over her because she has just the biggest dump truck ass of all time so he works on breaking her

out interesting harry potter and that and he also has a hairy fucking ass yeah as a cadabra bro avatica aspera give me some ass give me some ass bro vatican dump truck wingardium leviasa yes it's leviasa this is my favorite question of all time i love this this is a really good game do you have a Yes, it's leviassar. Leviassar. That's my favorite question of all time. I love this. This is a really good game. Do you have a breakdown of the plot here? I think that got it.

I'm going to give it that. My plot was just, it's just a great movie overall. The movie is good. Number one movie in the world. The number one movie. Number one movie in America. Harry Potter. Assy Potter.

Assy Potter. Okay, okay. Okay. Harry Potter Harry Potter Ass Potter Okay okay The Adventures of Moby Ass Same movie but

Instead of Hunting a whale Hunting a whale What's like the ass version of a whale Starfish Donkey The Adventures of Moby Ass Yes

The largest albino donkey in the world. Yes, I like that. And then The Ass Father. Movie about your dad? The Corleone family is just a family with giant asses, and they don't do any crime or anything. It's not really a gang. They just have thick butt.

Yeah, there's no plot at all. There's no plot. A modeling agency? Yeah, they run like a modeling agency for no plot at all just thick yeah thick butt thick butt uh okay yeah that that by far my favorite question of all time that that one that one did it for me um here we go here what was the when was the moment you realize your friends are assholes i don't know if they are oh that was sweet that was really sweet we can leave it there i don't think i do i don't think i ever realized that we just leave it there good friends nice i think i think the things that we think are asshole ish everyone does well i think there's

even the things that we might we might consider that makes us an asshole in certain scenarios I wouldn't say we're overall assholes no I would people who are way way bigger dicks than I think everybody thinks their friends are assholes in some capacity I think my friends are jackasses I wouldn't say assholes there you go jackass better yeah that's fair but I mean John used to bully me so oh that's okay well that's pretty asshole when we were like four he was like the same height as me. I was just letting it ride. I like that. He said used knowing you to outgrow it.

Um, let's see here. How did people come up with letters? See, this is just something we're not going to get the bottom of. Come up with what do you mean? Come up with like, think of the concept of a letter. So you have words, but you have to make the letters first no no you do not no i think they made like they did not have written language before they had verbal language yeah i think i think they probably you think people were just walking around silent

before they and they started writing shit down it was based off of just noises like yeah that's a and then they as they developed so many they had to come up with them yeah you come up with a letter to represent the noise is that that's it you combine these together and you get a shh okay yeah okay you thought that they came up with the written part first jesus no i was just thinking of like how do you think of your whole life's a conspiracy how do you survive you're right holy christ take the hat off dude i have a hard time on a day-to-day you know this life be rough on the reg for my king this one's just a fun one that i don't know unless it's an answer but it's just uh is john trying to fuck or dot dot dot that was in our dms yeah swear to god someone put that in our dm yeah swear to god of god my entire life john's getting some love in our dude no damn is john trying to fuck or dot dot dot that's it did you answer did you reply

this guy's getting way too much love and i did reply i forget what i put this guy's dominating the dm i'd probably put nah why didn't she just dm me because because nah that's fair not okay, okay How much Trying to say this word without getting it how much wiener angle is too much wiener angle Mmm-hmm like curve yeah like to which side like upper to the side I guess we're talking like mid bend tilt here So like how much would you say is like too much tilt i mean i got some pretty decent arc on mine no no i'm taking bend what do you mean arc like when you get hard you know it bends oh yours is like a it's kind of got like a rhino horn aspect to it

no he's saying he's saying instead of he's saying instead of nine o'clock he's at like 10 10 30 but you guys just go are just straight on when you're hard no i'm like 10 30 yeah you're up a little but it's straight still yeah straight yeah okay i'm talking upward i thought you had like a little no we're talking about curve like a captain hook like to the side no we're talking about bend it could be bent up oh like it starts in the middle like not the whole thing yes okay any any how much is too much yeah i i would think that there has to be some different type of techniques involved for things Yeah, you have to be very mobile in the head like yeah pissing with a boner would be tough It's already really difficult you got a stand like you got to be like up in the batter's box

Yeah, you think it's always tilted If you have it What do you mean like if it's soft yeah I assume not no I wouldn't it be though what do you mean why wouldn't cuz it's floppy units doesn't have any say floppy again it's laughing it's laughing but I would say let's see yeah do it visually anymore that's too much you like past 35 ish you're running into some issues if it's going downward No, either either direction be down or would be fucked up be fucking difficult. Yeah, I think if you had enough though

Like if you were on that extreme scale You could probably have it like a career in porn because they could get some better angles Maybe yeah, it was downward you have to like put them upside down every time Do you have to kind of start side thrusting if it's... Yeah, no, you have to have good hips. Or is it... You have to have some like... You have to have a real circular... I was going to say it's got to be more circular.

You kind of have to zoom it in. I wonder if downward exists, because that would be very difficult. That'd be fucking hard. Downward? Yeah. I don't think it... I think it only goes side. Yeah.

Okay, so let's say side. From what I've seen. You have to like get some real hip thrusts like in a circular motion i think any more than like 35 would be a tough time it'd be tough it reminds me someone someone write in with some experience on that one yeah well the guy maybe a woman's perspective on that would be good i don't know no the guy that did did have one i forget what he said did he send a picture no well what the fuck am i supposed to do with that information? Send it in. Rule number one, send it in. Bad smells that you secretly like.

I mean, we all know number one. Farts. Your own. Farts are good. Your own farts. Gasoline, I love. I love the smell of gasoline. Gasoline is really good. I do love the smell of gasoline.

I'll hang out in a gas station for like a little bit. Oh, I'll let the fumes fill up my car a little bit, and then I'll roll it up I always spill a little bit on the floor in my car Yeah, yeah, in the backseat. Yeah, yeah, if the guy behind me is filling up. I'm a hang. I'm a hang out Oops, I spilled it again. Yeah, or like it's jet fuel does that smell good too? Is that not the same as gasoline? I think it's it's a different some different different differently compounded Differently compounded Chemically But it probably smells similar This isn't every time But there have been sometimes

Pussy with a little Some kind of With a little extra flavor to it I don't I don't know how to put it It's just like a I mean sometimes If it's too clean

You don't feel as accomplished after You know I do like Sometimes I like going home With a little something I want Yeah I want to come I want to

come home a souvenir if you will i want some dirt on my boots letting me know that i did like some work i mean if you can't hold it in your friend's face when you get home what do you really do yeah if you don't have the if you don't have a little smell or something yeah yeah but i will say there's a definite threshold there's a line there's oh yeah it. It's on the very low side. Like anything over 35 degrees. If the scale goes from 1 to 100, I like anywhere between 0, which I'm cool with, and 10. I'm never mad at 0. But anything over 10, I'm not stoked about. Yeah.

And there's been some hundreds before. Now, something that can be on the way opposite scale of that, my balls. Ooh. Your balls. Like the smell of that, I like that in the 80 to 100 zone zero ten I want that up there I could second your balls for sure oh yeah it's one of mine what do you ever what do you ever like it's honestly sometimes purely comical how bad they'll smell after like a long day of doing something oh yeah it's the best joke if you're sitting down it's a mess if you're sitting down for like most of a

day in some sort of sweaty environment and you go in for a quick under the under the ball scoop you almost like if someone saw you do that they would be repulsed yeah because you just go oh the that's the best part about it is you do that and you go like oh and you do like you didn't even believe the first one was so bad that was bad wow i don't even believe there's no way wait hold on uh kind of something in the opposite realm is like a a fresh freshly opened bag of hot cheetos yeah they smells oh ruffles they stink or like fritos yeah there's something specific about the hot cheetos with lime where they smell like a fucking fart a whole ass fart yeah but i dive right in immediately yeah yeah yeah it's gotten

to the point where i actually purposely don't like smell it i just eat it yeah because it smells absolutely i open it right into your nose what else is a good one um skunk i do like a little bit really skunk i do love the smell of weed i guess really bad smell it's not i guess i used to like hate it but yeah does coke count love the smell of cocaine yeah love it that's the best i or i should have said my keys i like the smell of my keys i love the smell of my keys i like to sniff them i like to sniff them in the middle of a crowd at a festival yeah i just like to smell my keys i love the smell of my keys i like to sniff them i like to sniff them in the middle of a crowd at a festival yeah i just like to smell them in a bathroom body whatever yeah i feel that uh it's gonna be a couple more fun not one that i like i don't know just one that there's ones that you just can't help yourself from smelling even though you know

it's gonna be bad and it's like a dirty sock or your shoes after wearing them all day you know what i do to myself all the time is i smell shots. Really? I, I, it makes me want to throw up every time, but I don't know why it's become a, I guess I'm like eliminated that from my process because I'm immediately more like predisposed to throwing up. Like I think it preps me better. Yeah. It's like a mental prep.

It's like, Oh, it's going to be, I just got so good at like chasing them with a little pre chase and getting it down to where I don't taste it at all. If I smell it, it ruins the whole thing for me. Wait,

that product. Cool thought. you know how parents like the smell of alcohol your parents like the smell of alcohol depends if your parents like the taste you mean no like because my mom will oh no no yeah sorry it's i think it's the weirdest thing ever when parents or old people love this a lot of older people like will drink alcohol straight which is like something our generation just doesn't really do besides a nice glass of whiskey. Yeah, I feel like they all love the taste of alcohol, and I think it's all shit. Both of our moms sip shots. I think it's one of those things where you just get it with time.

I used to not like wine. I used to not like beer, but you just start to like it. That's the next phase. That's like a 40 and up. The next phase is in your mid-40s. You start sipping straight to drink. Or if you have a kid, then it's like, ooh. Because it just doesn't—you've got to keep something exciting going on yeah you know what i mean no i think wine

is good i don't i'm willing to say in general beer is just not good i love beer all beer you like the taste of beer i do i will drink a beer purely because i want a beer not because i want to get buzzed like i'll have a beer at dinner and no i'm not going to get buzzed no i'm willing to say that compared to things that taste good beer tastes tastes like shit. Like Kool-Aid tastes good. Okay. Sure. So you can't. A beer doesn't taste good.

I mean, that's like saying anything sweet beats anything like savory. Like, no, it's not true. Like a lemonade tastes good. Yeah. Beer doesn't taste good. Yeah. I like a good beer. As long as it's a light beer.

I'm not going to drink a Coors Light at dinner. I'll drink like a nice IPA. But you like to be buzzed. See, that's where you lose me. Yeah. I mean, it's still, I know I'm drinking a beer. It'll give me a light buzz, but I do like the Light at dinner. I'll drink like a nice IPA. But you like to be buzzed. See, that's where you lose me. Yeah, I mean, it's still, I know I'm drinking a beer. It'll give me a light buzz, but I do like the taste of it. Would I drink it if it was 0% alcohol?

Probably not. So you don't like the taste of it? No, but I genuinely do is what I'm saying. I have had, I have had some, what are they, O'Doul's? O'Doul's? O'Doul's? The non-alcoholic beer. Those are pretty good.

Yeah, I mean, they make like Heineken Zero now. They make like Bud Light Zero. Heineken sucks. Yeah, Heineken sucks. Heineken's ass water. Heineken is shit. Don't be sponsored by Heineken. Those are pretty good. Yeah, I mean they make like Heineken zero now. They make like Bud Light zero. Heineken sucks Yeah, Heineken sucks in general. Heineken is shit. Don't be sponsored by Heineken. Don't fucking sponsor this. That's the Heineken ad right there All right, I got one here. What's the weirdest thing that you're afraid of? Hmm I could start. Okay, give us a... I have the fear of tiny holes.

Of course you do. What does that even mean? It's called trypophobia. And, like, honeycomb. What? Or... Shut the fuck up. There's these weird plants with, like...

You're full of shit. They have little holes. Let him break it down. It's, like, this weird fucking thing that has, like like little seeds that come out of it that like I don't know It fucking makes my skin crawl. No, but you like Chinese finger trap so True and I do like pimple popping videos, but there's something about those holes that you just don't like I don't if you look up trypophobia on your computer in those pictures like there will be like pictures to fuck with people and it's Like a hand with like these like cavernous holes on them it fucking makes my skin crawl interesting um so i can't

sleep if the door isn't locked really it's just like a weird thing i don't know sum up more there anxiety anxiety even while he sleeps yeah i don't know it's just a weird i also can't sleep if i don't remember if i locked my car or if i if i didn't lock my car eight did i turn off the oven for sure but things i'm afraid of i mean i used to run up the stairs as a kid oh yeah just for no reason like if i turn off the light downstairs i bet i'm gonna be up those stairs in one second oh easily do you remember when we used to walk home from like the frats and we'd be walking at night and morgan would be he'd be like i know you're out there you're not gonna get me i already know you're there yeah so in

college is when we were all watching dexter was a thing yeah so we used to like watch episodes on like a friday night saturday and then like when you're walking home it's just like no not today dex skate not today not today i know you're in the bush. You're not going to get me. I mean, as a kid, I was insanely afraid of the dark, and I currently am still madly claustrophobic, but that's like a rational fear. See, I'm only claustrophobic if I can't move my arms. Like, if you buried me in the sand, but I could still, like, up to my chest, I'd be fine, but as soon as my arms can't move, like... That's fair.

Like, anytime you're wrestling with someone and they have your arms pinned, like, I start to actually freak out. Yeah. That's fair. I just get really uncomfortable when they have your arms pinned like i start to actually freak out yeah that's fair i just get really uncomfortable when shit's like way too close to my face if i'm in like a small space where it's just like i'm too close to like the pillow next to me at night and i wake up and it's like just right here like think i'm in like a fucking coffin or something yeah i get horrified thinking about like you know in uh what's that the big movie where they escape from prison? Shawshank Redemption. Uh-huh.

When they're in that tube. Like thinking about escaping from a prison in like a shit tube. Yeah. And just knowing I wouldn't be able to do it. Yeah. Even if my life depended on it. Every time I watch that, I just imagine that there's like a metal grate at the end of that tunnel. Yeah.

And then you're just like, oh, I'm fucking dead. Yeah. I'll die. Because, yeah, how are you going to turn around? Like, what are you going to do? Yeah, you just crawl backwards for another. That's why we watch the cave crawler TikToks. Yeah. You just got to relax, dude. Yeah, I'll die. Yeah. How are you gonna turn around? Like what are you? Yeah, you just crawl backwards for another We watch the cave crawler tick tocks. Yeah, she got a real accident. She's got a relax I'm getting like yeah hyperventilating already warm in here. Now. It's a little warmer. Yeah

What songs are on Satan Spotify playlist Friday by Rebecca Beck Every day is Friday. Yeah, it's a good one Yeah, I imagine this is like i don't know if you ever worked in like retail or anything how they have like that loop of the same song oh i've done it yeah i worked at abercrombie oh yeah you did yeah it was a movie dude you are your life's a movie dude um what songs would the devil like to torture us with wagon i think that one song tequila oh yeah i could see myself blowing my brains out to that dude i bet you hell's lit though would the devil like to torture us with? Wagon Wheel. I think that one song, Tequila.

Oh, yeah. I could see myself blowing my brains out to that. Dude, I bet you hell's lit, though. I don't think it's like a... No. Yeah, I mean... I saw a tweet the other day. It was like, what if you were going to hell, and then you were just like, nah.

Like, you're out there, and then you have to go there, and you're like, no, I don't want to. Like, what are they going to do, send you to more hell? Where are you going to go? That's what I'm saying. I bet you hell's just lit. All the most fun people are there. Yeah.

Get way better interviews for the pod. Yeah, we have some dope-ass interviews. Yeah, we cannot continue the pod in heaven. It would just be... Might be the reason we're not in. Yeah. It's definitely on the list. Yeah.

Yeah. What is your guy's message to mouth breathers stop this is serious use your nose this is serious yeah put touch your lips and try to breathe without opening and then do that forever yeah yeah like hold your breath and then if you when you need to breathe don't open your mouth and then when you breathe through your nose, realize that you can do that. Yes. It always bugs me when I'm like in Costco. I feel like Costco has the highest population of mouth breathers.

A hundred percent. People are just sucking the fucking air out of the fucking air. Costco. That is, that is mouth breather city. Yeah. You know what I just thought of? That's some shit that they would do in hell. Huh?

Uh, you would be forced to watch people who like post like a million Instagram stories of like when they're at a concert. Ooh, that would be like a song thing. And you could hear their voice in the background. They're singing every song. That's my favorite shit. I saw one of those this weekend. I was like, how cringe is that? It's so good. And they're like, cause you just know they're going to see it tomorrow. And they were too fucked up to realize you could hear them singing the whole song and they're singing it so loud. You can like almost not even hear the music. You can only hear them singing. I could,

I could just see like every Cardi B song. It's a little bitch. You just hear fucking everyone singing. I love that. That's good stuff. Um, what's the most wholesome thing you've ever done with or for your pet? Hmm.

So it's going to make me sad. Oh, that's okay. sad um most wholesome thing uh one of the one of the wholesome things i think i did is remember when we lived in the shack and i built that ramp oh yeah outside because we oh the actual like shed that you guys so we are that was scary our door didn't open to the outside but we had like this little side thing that you had to go outside and then go through a gate but i made a little ramp on both sides of the window and then i could keep the window open just a little bit so she'd go that is fire that's fire that's fire um one of the things i had was um going outside and tanning with your dog and putting the sunglasses on both of us. Oh, that was good. That was a good,

those pictures were money. Picture. That's some good shit. Yeah. What else? Oh, just absolutely. So I had Guinea pigs in high school and just had two Guinea pigs.

Just would have Guinea pigs. Yep. Just put them in those two names. Um, Coco and moose. That's fucking awesome. Put those little young boys in a ball and just chill all day. Just vibe out with them

Just make like a little Like block off the kitchen or whatever so they got so we're just all in the same area. They're just rolling just rolling Flicked my mouse against the wall when he bit my finger and I just went like I was like fuck Sent them towards the wall. That's yeah, that yeah that's wholesome yeah that's probably the most yeah I don't know why when I thought you were saying that story with the balls I was gonna imagine you like yeah I made like a Hot Wheels track from and I rolled launched oh no but fucking building on top of that was like leave them in a ball for accidentally like an entire day yeah that's not good but then there's just like shit and piss in it. Yeah. Yeah, that's not good. All right, ladies and gentlemen, that was episode 23. You know, thanks for tuning in for another week.

Yeah, make sure to like, comment, share it to people. We're building. What are we building, Jay? Building a guild. We're building a guild. If you guys want to join our world of warcraft guild you can yes if you're gonna need a five-star and when they say our i'm not included in that so you can be i don't want to be i'm good but um yeah if you guys have any stupid in there if you guys have any

stupid questions for the pod just uh dm us on instagram um we got the mommy daddy merch links in bio yes sir if you want to support us because fucking we need it, dude. We're trying to boost the production value here. Yep. So, I think we'll have to see you next week, folks. Yeah. Gang shit. Later. Peace.