NO FOMO - 55. Fan Sub City

Episode Date: August 26, 2023

🔔 Subscribe & Follow: ⁠https://linktr.ee/nofomopod⁠ 🎽 Merch: ⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/no-fomo/⁠ Welcome Back Fomosapiens. It's Fan Sub City. Let's Evolve Together, NO FOMO. Support the Podcast: Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code NOFOMO at MANSCAPED.com!

Ladies and gentlemen welcome back, back, back to the Mocs fucking FOMO show. Now it's FOMO. What's up bitches? And gentlemen? Here we go. We're back with Grindelwald. We're back with the Skeletor. Alright, you fucking dick.

And Jezebel. The Hobbit's fine. Behelzebub. Hey. Simmer. Simmer? Simmer. Dude, I'm not simmering down, dude.

I'm on heat. Hype him up. This is the fucking dance down, dude. I'm on heat. Hype them up. This is the fucking dance episode, dude. I'm on broil. I'm on heat because it's fucking 90 degrees in here already. Dude, it's fine. I'm on full broil. Today's episode is a unique one because we're going to be saying a bunch of absurd bullshit.

Which makes it so unique. Yeah. Sponsored by you guys. Sponsored by. This is a fully, not funded. You guys don't give us any money or anything. Subsidized. Some people do.

Useless, but we appreciate you. Yeah. But we're doing all fan subs because we have a giveaway. And we're just ripping tough. Subsidized by. So technically the whole episode is sponsored by Manscaped because we're doing a Manscaped giveaway. Yes.

Oh, yeah. I forgot we're doing the giveaway. Yeah. So best question gets Garrett's used Manscaped underwear. Used Manscaped underwear with shit stain included. Did that guy who said the question ever hit us up about that? What? Wasn't there someone who was going to buy underwear from us?

Oh, yeah. Oh, no. It was in the last note. I could clip it so he sees it. Yeah, clip it. Okay. Just hit him up and say, hey, we're down. If he asks that, hopefully he's a listener.

Yeah. Wait, what was it? A hundred bucks for underwear worn by all three of us? Is that what he said? Well, he said how much for Garrett's underwear, I think. Yeah, that's what it was. No, we said how much would you do? That's what we were.

No, he asked how much Garrett's were. Yeah. Okay. And then we said we will do a trio package for 100 bucks. Yeah. Which still has so much legs for me. Yeah. I'm still all in. I might even drop that. If he hasn't hit us up yet, 50 bucks. Yeah, which is I still has so much legs for me. Yeah, I'm still all in I might even drop that if he hasn't hit us up yet 50 bucks. Yeah, I could find him

Yeah, just go through the DM track him down. I was a DM sir a discord sub might have been multiple people Okay, I thought we agreed you weren't gonna put the laptop on your lap anymore, bud Well, I need I need a fresh view at the questions fresh view fresh. We got it We got it. You can't do it. He can't turn like this. You want my computers got it that no we're good. All right. Well that's all neck doesn't turn. It doesn't have a thumbnail Are you ready for the fucking hype up game? Oh, I forgot you had a hype. Oh, yeah, hype us up. All right I can't wait to hear what this is gonna. This is the homo sapien Appreciation fucking hide the fuck up hide me out for the record. I brought the cocktails for a hype up my was my One where we have to participate with the ooze. Yeah, okay, okay? So you do another these yeah, but this is for the fans, okay?

It's ones for the fans you're doing another one of these okay. I'm just who are you dude? I'm just saying so remember it's ah and then yeah, okay wait. No. I don't remember I'm not even joking first thing is ah what I say statement You go ah then I say another one spot. We're supposed to be a natural reaction like we just and then we go like yeah Like yeah, yeah, okay? Okay, it's the fans episode oh that's so we're supposed to be hyped for that no okay let me fucking cook are you guys fucking dyslexic dude over dyslexic christ no i just like you guys get how to do it now oh we like it yeah yeah but that one felt wrong to be yeah, let me cook up all right All right Morgan hates you guys for the record fuck it. No

It's the fan sub so no FOMO fans are death 60% male fan base 40% women Study show no FOMO fans score lower on IQ test. Oh, we're not fucking nerds 40% women. Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Alright, here we go. What's the most masculine way to kiss another man not on the lips? Not on the lips? So like a cheek kiss? What's the most masculine way to do it? Okay. Suck their neck.

Like behind them? No, that's not it. A rear cheek kiss? Did you guys ever wish you were part of families that did the cheek kiss? All the time. When you were growing up? Yeah. I always wished I was part of it.

Like, oh, how the fuck you doing? One of my good friends' families growing up, they were so Italian. They did that? Like the grandparents. Is that an Italian thing? Is it only Italian? It's very European.

I know a lot of... It's like a Spanish thing. I know South Americans do it. Love languages. Yep, love languages yep love languages yeah um that's what's kind of tough dude i don't know if there's a masculine way to kiss him i would say on the lips is the most masculine way right well that's why we got it we had to get rid of it oh okay okay okay i think like uh because that's dominant no i think a power like

behind the neck grab and just like plant it on the cheek or like a side like from the side i mean i feel like we do that you're like fuck i love you brother and we usually do it on the lips because we're actual men but yeah you like you would give someone a kiss on the cheek maybe like a power i could go for like a forehead too no that's like a just a double head grab and just a powerful yes yeah you gotta be grabbing head yeah there's if you gotta it's gotta be like a there has to be like a bro shake element to it yeah There has to be a grab in it. Mm hmm. OK.

I really always wish that I could do that. Like I thought about at one point in high school starting doing that, like just being like, hey, how you doing? Nice to meet you. I can't get away with it. No. I've seen the video of I forget what soccer player was. He plays for Barcelona or something, but it's like him and his girlfriend sitting next to each other. And it's like me as soon as I get a girlfriend.

And he has this line of like 30 girls like all coming to kiss him. and his like girlfriend saying next to each other and it's like me as soon as I get a girlfriend he has this line of like 30 girls like all coming to kiss him and he has to do that to each one it's so funny it's so drawn out it's like like eight minutes of him just I bet you there I bet you there are white girls who like complain about that if they get like a European boyfriend who does that oh if they do that to other girls like why are you fucking kissing them because it's a white girl complain if you talk to other girls. Are you kidding me?

That's what I'm saying. If you have a friend who's a girl, you're in trouble. Yeah. Like the cheat kiss is just like a weird way to meet someone, I feel like. Well, but it's normal for them. Still weird. But you know someone's gotten a girlfriend and they've done that. I don't think it's how you meet people.

It's how you embrace people that you are familiar with. You wouldn't just go up to someone and do it. No, I've seen them. No, yeah, they do it. They do it on TV shows and shit. Well, it's a european handshake yeah all right we should see what they do to the people they love yeah all right that one was from connor right connor right all right for your support okay here we go um fight what's something you don't understand and also don't want to learn? Women. That's a good one. Like Wi-Fi and shit doesn't matter to me.

Or Bluetooth. That's fair. Couldn't care less. Dude, how does that shit even really work, though? I don't care. I don't know. I don't care. Dude, because, you know, when they did...

Satellites are some shit. Speaking of the moon landing thing, you know how they did the call to the moon while they were doing the moon landing? Satellite shit. How the fuck does that work? It's satellite communication, bro. It's something with satellites. And there's 5Gs in the air. They're just shooting 5G out.

Yeah. There's just 5G. Like, I will just blindly buy an extender. I don't need to know why it doesn't work. Yeah. I don't... There's some... There's a lot, actually.

Yeah. Chinese. I don't there's some there's a lot actually yeah yeah uh I had someone I had someone asking me like how like uh it was like a simple one it's like how fucking rain works or some shit and it's like I was like about to go through like try and explain like the event I was like it just does it dude no I honestly think the like the one thing that fucks me up the most that is so difficult to perceive is like a speaker how does like especially if you're on the phone with someone, how does a tiny little thing recreate someone's voice exactly in your ear in an instant? It's just a vibrating little fucking thing.

How does it digitally make noise? Like how do we have copies of how the noises are supposed to come out correctly? Like a CD or like a record makes sense. Records makes no sense. No, a record makes sense. A vinyl doesn't make any sense. make vinyl makes it. It's just

fucking the things. It's just the thing I mean low key of vinyl almost makes more sense than like a fucking CD. Yeah, it does make sense because it's just literally a needle like bouncing off of the actual grooves of the song. Yeah, but they're like that makes more it still doesn't make sense, but

more the fact that we can go that far back and still not understand a single fucking thing is so wait does any electronic make any sense at all no does anything at all make any sense no not really right even when someone kind of explains that to me it doesn't no it makes less sense yeah well yeah wait so what's a vinyl supposed to be doing there's a little needle that just is that needle is connecting to the groove. There's grooves. They have the actual like audio grooves of the song, like digital, like basically like the, like the waveform, like you'd see on like a digital screen, but it's like the waveform is micro. No.

Okay. But no, I don't know if it works like that. Okay. So what you're explaining made sense for a second, but then think about how does it differentiate between a drum beat and a, like a horn on that? It's just a full audio file no it's not a waveform though no well it's not in the way you perceive it in a digital way it's it's the same it's the same thing but in a vinyl form like it's someone's gonna have to get back to us

i don't fucking know yeah we don't and i don't care yeah yeah don't care yeah that's someone's i mean there's you name name something you don't know how it works and i'll tell you if i care about it chinese Chinese. Nope. The language or the people? The language. No, I want to know what John was thinking. What? You don't care about the language?

Either way, I'm fine. Ooh, I was trying to give you an out there. Sorry to our Chinese fans. I care about you. I care about people. I just don't care about China. You care about people? I don't. That's a good quote.

You care about, like, three people. So if we're going to break it down, things i care about is so minimal to where you know them already yeah i've got three of them yeah you don't understand me but i like you that was sweet yeah so most things for that one i feel like if i don't understand it i don't care to learn about it if it works and i think unless my answer to it is oh yeah okay like if it's not like very obvious i wouldn't go out of way my way to learn but youtube youtube like random shit that pops up i'm down to dig in sometimes like i was watching a video documentary of that line they're building in the line city they're building in saudi arabia that was i was literally just laying in bed and i just saw that

pop up and I was like oh I'm watching the fuck out of this it is insane. That's just crazy. What is it like a trillion dollars or some shit? I think it's multi trillion. Yeah, wait do we know won't be done for like 70 years or something Oh really? It's like miles and miles fucking like it's like it's across hundred miles long. Yeah, apparently the 300 so like I don't know what you call them like the King at the Sheik of Saudi Arabia? The investment fund. The main guy.

The Saudi investment fund is what's funding him. No, but you know the main dude. The good-looking young guy. The king. He thinks he's the king. But he was saying apparently the reason that they're doing it is the infrastructure in Saudi Arabia is going to be capped out by 2030. So they don't have room for any more people in literally seven years.

Oh, really? Yeah. So they're like, we had to do something drastic. Oh, I thought the thing, the reason they were doing all these, because they have like seven different things that are ridiculous that they're building that are like trillions of dollars each. Yeah. I thought the reason they were doing it is because they realized

that the oil money is going to run out. So they were starting to put that money into other shit like a tangible asset no he said literally the infrastructure is on pace to max out in the country of saudi arabia in literally seven years so they had to do something quick to like in like the city areas that they're at or what well they either expand the city right well because we've got to be maxed out right no are we not maxed out? No. In what?

This country? In the U.S. Have you ever flown in a plane before? That's fair. There's so much. There's almost nothing going on out there. There's so many places. I'm just thinking about here.

Yeah. But I guess, so they were obviously talking about a massive expansion of the existing infrastructure of the city. And then they're like, well, this isn't sustainable. Like, this isn't how, like, there's got to be. So obviously. Yeah.

Take the third world. So with the insane amount of money they have they have this team of architects from all over the world there's like a couple american guys british guys everywhere indian guys and they're like trying to think of like what a like future sustainable city looks like and it the main thing is that it's not car centric so most of like the livable area we live in is covered by fucking roads and shit. It's kind of ass that way. There's no cars or anything. Well, so that's a big push just in stuff like in general

is they're trying to make it not with cars. But that thing, the line is supposedly supposed to have everything you would need because it's 100 miles long, but every mile has everything you would need. Oh, no, even less than that. So you would never have to go to the other end. It's even less than that, yeah. They said everything you do, your space will all be in the it's modular So like your actual like pod thing can like move up and down or can move so your pod your unit your unit

Movie pod so like imagine like instead of going to call an elevator your actual unit just moves down and you get out But but you don't do it that often your actual unit just moves down and you get out. But you don't do it that often. It's crazy. No, but like if you wanted to move like a mile. You just switch pods with somebody, like switch spots. You wouldn't have to move your shit. Yeah, it's like Legos.

Your house moves. It's like Legos, yeah. Well, no, I think. It's exactly like Legos. It's exactly like Legos. It's just we're always moving towards Legos. It's a Lego city. Yes.

But you know what I was thinking about? Congrats on the Legos, Soddy. You know what I was thinking about for cars on the legos soddy you know what i was thinking about for cars they should just we should just take away all ownership and then like when you need one you just go down there but i think that's exactly what's happening yeah because it's so stupid like well that's why uber ordered like an massive fleet of fucking self-driving cars because you won't need to and the and the price of calling it uber will become immensely cheaper because there's no drivers because like i use my car like three hours a week.

It's so stupid. Well, you're also a fucking... You're also a fucking... Absolute caveman. I'm a wizard, dude. Sorry. You're a hobbit. Okay. I leave my house one second.

What was the question? What was the question again? Who was that one from? How to kiss a boy or something? That one could win. Head of JP? What was the actual question from the record? Pinocchio?

Was it the... You don't want to learn? Yeah it the you don't want to learn? Yeah, stuff you don't want to learn. That one could win. We went on a rant. That was pretty good. All right, this one's good. You know how in Mean Girls when she knows when it's about to rain from her tits?

What would be the guy equivalent to that? Oh, okay. So it doesn't have to be rain. I think guy equivalent would be like a more severe natural disaster. Like you know a volcano is about to erupt. You're about to come. You're about to bust and you're like, holy shit. I know when Morgan gets home and my anus starts tickling.

Okay. Okay, that's a good one too, yeah. Or like if I shit my pants, it's going to be a shitty day. Ooh. Oh, but in what way shitty? It's got to be like natural kind of thing. Oh, it's got to be a natural disaster. It can't just be like like because then you're getting into like astrology kind of thing like retrograde sort of shit Yeah, it's got to be like the UV is gonna be 10 today. I woke up with eczema

You kind of know that I start getting sunburned indoors when the Sun's out yeah Yeah, you're like, it's daytime. It's daytime now. My skin's burning. It must be daytime. Yeah, that's fair. I mean, we can go. It's got to be something with a boner. Yeah, obviously a boner.

It has to be boner related. I think. Think of the reasons you get a boner. Oh, okay. Like your favorite team's game started and your cock starts getting hurt. Oh, yeah. Oh, fuck. We got to get home.

Oh, we're up at halftime. I've got to fucking drop. I've got blue balls. You get a pulse every time your team scores a 10? Yeah, what is it called? A kegel? Yeah, like a kegel flex. Kegel flex?

Or you have blue balls. I'm definitely not getting laid today. Yeah. Oh, it's like, oh, I know this. I know that the fucking Patriots. Oh, you get pre-blue. Like, you're going on a hinge date, and you get pre-blue balls. You're like, fuck, I'm not even going to go.

That would be good. That's it. Or it could be something. It's like, oh, I've got a I've got a half Chubb it's like I know the Patriots Eagles over is gonna hit like it's a guarantee Like a lot. I know oh, this is a lock dude. Yeah, that's sense for lock. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's gotta be it's gotta It is hot as fuck in here though. Should we turn it on? No, I'm fine. I'm fine now. Yeah, you're fine I'm literally completely fine. You're gonna

Know that one from from the guy who forced us to turn it off has two cocktails fucking sweating boy Yeah, yeah, but that's my bed. Not these nuts not these nuts. That's a good one nuts. I like that. That was a good There's some creativity in that there is yes Okay, if you could apply dog time 7x speed to anything. What would it be and why oh? Laundry. Ooh, that's a good one. Laundry. I hate laundry more than anything. Fucking hate laundry.

Traffic. Foreplay. Munchin' box. Put me in. No, I want reverse dog speed for that. Yeah, I have a sick love for that. What's reverse dog speed? I have a sick love for that. One-seventh speed?

Yeah. No, I'll do that all day. You want crocodile speed for that? Ooh, night... No. Nighttime? Time to sleep? I was going to say reverse.

I wish nighttime was drastically longer than daytime. Time to sleep? Oh, yeah, reverse. No, date. Just life. You want to be faster? Fuck it, dude. No, I can click.

7X. He just fast-forwards through all the bullshit? Yeah. Yeah. I don't want to be faster? Fuck it, dude. No, like in Click. 7X. He just fast forwards through all the bullshit. Yeah. Yeah. I don't want to watch my kid grow up. Time to shit? Yeah. No, shit's a good time.

I relish those moments. Yeah, that's opposite again. I can't think of anything I would for sure. Cooking. It's kind of shit. Cooking, like waiting for the food to be done. Yeah. If it's anything that.

Yeah, anything like traffic. Oh, yeah, just cooking in general. Being on hold. You can still make good meal. It'll just go way quicker Yeah, or tummy aches tummy aches. Oh, yeah Mmm Gaps between getting laid That's the one that's your life You just fucking you just fast forward to being dead You just press the button fast forward to the next time I get late Holy shit Your childhood is just quick as fuck Like I could have sworn it would have happened sooner than that

Holy shit That's good That one's got legs too who was that one from That was good Not Deez Nuts again Oh that was not dude that guy's a fucking That guy's on the yeah guys I might have it yeah that's wrong I guess grilling

hibachi okay how fucked up do you guys get before a show and how much are you drinking while playing I guess it kind of goes for you too yeah oh yeah well I mean while playing John gets fucking lost half the time. Well, he's probably just bored. So before we started doing extracurriculars more often, it used to be a classic cycle of get vodka Red Bulls, and then as soon as the Red Bull wears off completely, the vodka kicks in. That's all we would ever drink at shows, I feel like. It was like when I was newly 21,

that was a drink that I knew that I wouldn't get made fun of for ordering. Yeah. Because I didn't really like any cocktail or didn't know enough about any to like find one I liked. I didn't know that it was okay to order just shit. I would just get nervous every time I go to the bar. I'd just be like vodka Red Bull. That's the only thing I know. The most John has done though is we did the 30 rack in a day and he fell asleep at the club.

Oh my God. Well, so we did the 30 rack in a day and he fell asleep at the club oh my god well so we did the 30 rack in a day i went that for explain what that is oh 30 rack 30 beers in 30 beers no like every single person drinks their own individual 30 yeah yeah so i i think i was at like 20 i was at like 20 or something and someone invited me to the horse races and i went to the horse races because we did 20 together i think oh yeah something like that you did 20 the day of you did 30 the day of a show I think right yeah I mean I know this is true but I'm just like baffled yeah so then I went to that and I morgue picked me up or something from my house and we got to the show do you remember that I definitely didn't do it if I picked you up no you I don't think you did the 30 rack with me but when we

got that you parked your car like fucking six blocks away and you got we got out and you were like oh i have this fifth of vodka and we slammed i think i slammed like five shots before we went in yeah and then would you like call a girl and then fell asleep outside of her house or something how did that work oh that no that was a different was it you were a tool who fell asleep on the couch behind us that was me yeah that was me yeah that was a different night, though. Because that night was the night, I don't think you actually had a show. I think we were just going there. And I got kicked out for being too drunk.

That was like the third or fourth time. They had to have us stop playing there because of you guys. No, he wasn't even playing. Me and Morgan just went. No, I'm saying, but obviously they recognize you. But I got kicked out for being too drunk. And then I had a moment of just crystal clear fucking idea in my head. But I got kicked out for being too drunk. And then I had a moment of like just crystal clear fucking idea in my head. And I got kicked out the back and I went up to the front and I was like, hey, I just walked

a girl to her Uber. Can you let me back in? And they let me back in. And I showed back up and Morgz in the place by himself. And he's like, what the fuck? But when we when we first started doing shows, I feel like we used to get way more hammered. Oh, yeah. I do like eight drinksed. Oh, yeah. I'd do like eight drinks during.

Well, yeah. So we would definitely get heavily buzzed going there. And then most of the time when we were starting out, we were playing three-hour sets. So we would literally have, I would have like 10 drinks probably. There's been nights where we would have to close and I don't remember closing the show. Well, because the three-hour shows went rough. Yeah, that was gnarly. Starting when no one's at the club,

there's a level of anxiety about that. Oh, you have to get fucked up to even go into it. And then we have an unlimited bar tab, so it's like, all right. But I say lately it's like a nice pregame, and then I probably only have like one drink during the set. I'd say you guys drink less during now. Yeah.

Well, because it's also only like an hour usually. God. You just fart on cam? You're sick into your arms. You just fucking fart cam? You just blew yourself up. None of us would have even noticed. I fucking gassed it out.

I hope the mic got all that. Oh, it definitely got that. It picked that up. But yeah, we've gotten better about not getting completely shit-faced, but usually it's only an hour set, so that's fine. Okay. Yeah. After we get...

So it was before, during, and after? How okay yeah after we get so it was before during and after um how how fucked up did we get before a show i'd say i do like a two shot morgan does two shot and a couple drink regiment but morgan does his classic six in a row yeah morgan morgan's morgan's a monster well i need to figure out ways to just speed up the process because like you're trying to dog speed it yeah i'm trying to dog speed getting drunk that's what you do it for yeah that's actually a really good one how do we not think of that yeah i mean getting drunk and getting to perfect drunkness well you just the thing about you is you don't even wait for the first four shots kick and you just keep taking them yeah so it just compounds because they're so quick yeah well it it wears off too quick if i

don't do a lot no i think i think you are actually dog speeding it to where you're like, I'll just make sure I take eight and then I'll for sure be drunk. And I also don't want to spend the time to drink eight drinks. I mean, there's obviously a time factor involved. Eight drinks over an hour versus eight drinks in... Oh, you're wasted, yeah. Yeah. Speaking of eight drinks.

Oh, what? I gave it to the ape. No, yeah we need drink both need one more dude passion fruit dude you don't even care about me i didn't look i didn't even look and actually that one's good so don't fucking bitch my second favorite one and then the follow-up to that was what's the most fucked up you've ever been for the podcast? Oh, me and Mark's solo podcast. Oh, yeah, you guys. Where was I? Yeah, I don't know where you were.

I was gone for an episode, and then you guys tried to record one. Oh, yes. Have we ever talked about this? Yeah, we talked about it. We definitely talked about it. Yeah, we talked about it. But, yeah, so. That video is un-fucking-believable.

Why have we not posted that? When you said, where'd the girls go? Please tell the story. I don't care if you love it. Okay, I got this one, yeah. So, me and Morg finished a fifth before we started doing it. This was 12 noon on a Wednesday. We had pre-decided this was going to be a blackout.

A bottle and a bag. Yeah, a bottle and a bag. And we tried to do, okay, we got blacked out doing a tiktok live before so then we're doing the podcast and we were saying absolutely nonsense to each other for probably 20 minutes straight and morg looks at me just he goes where'd the girls go and we well yeah this is noon on a wednesday and it had only been us in the house the whole time dude i went through like some blacked out episode. Did you guys take shrooms that day too? No.

We really thought you did. But he was sitting there looking at me, arguing with me that there were girls. No, he's like, no, dude, there were girls. Yeah. He sent me that video. There were girls here. I watched the whole thing. It's fucking unbelievable.

Yeah, we might have to do something with it. I think we should post that. Yeah, we should just post it. Fuck it. It's so bad though. But we'll just post it with another one. No, but it's so bad that it's so fucking good.

It's so bad. No, it's incredible. Yeah, we'll have to privately link that I'd say 80% of it is me and Morgan looking at each other and be like,

what? What the fuck? Well, because we had all these like heavy debate questions. Yeah, we had a bunch of stuff. Like you have to think. You were the most lost

I've ever seen you in existence. Yeah, that was really bad. But had to do it for the people. You got to do it. Yeah. So in existence. Yeah, that was really bad. But I had to do it for the people. You got to do it. Yeah. So that was. Yeah, that's it easy. We've got a couple of hungover mornings where we'll just crush a 30 rack.

When we first started doing it, we'd do Sunday morning hungovers. Yeah, there was one time you guys had a party at your house. We had the keg, the President's Day one. Yeah, the President's Day keg. And then we did it right then. And we were just smashing whatever was left over. We stayed up all night. And then you came back in the morning. We're like, we're doing it right then and we were just smashing. I don't think we slept whatever was left over We stayed up all night, and then you came back in the morning. We're like we're doing it right now Yeah, I think I and I left at like 5 a.m. You came back at like 8

We just said we got to do it now. We're gonna be dead today Miss those but I don't die don't honestly Speaking of which all right. What's the next one? Yeah? Who is that? shit, this episode will be the drunkest we've been in a long time for this. D Jacobson, at D Jacobson. Lame name. Lame name. No surprise for you D Jakes. Good question, but lame name.

Yeah, change your name. I like it. I think you have a good name. All right, let's see. Oh, this one threw me for a loop just reading it, but I had to stop thinking about it. Okay. What would a hot dog pizza sandwich... Oh, no.

How would a hot dog pizza sandwich work? A hot dog pizza sandwich. All right. Yeah. I think you just roll... It's like a hot dog in the middle of like a calzone. Yeah, I was thinking you got to wrap the dog in the pizza. You have to wrap the dog in the pizza? I don't think dog in the i think that's that hard like a like does that do it like a hot dog what's it called a pigs in a blanket but pizza version yeah and then you like a dodger dog with

like a small pizza so you got wang hanging out both ends yeah is that a hot dog pizza sandwich if just a pizza then you obviously you throw a couple slices on the end of that okay i mean oh no no no no wait two full pizzas pizza slices are the sandwich bread yeah if you just put a hot dog in a pizza in a pizza yeah is that a hot dog pizza sandwich yeah it's a hot dog what the fuck else are you gonna call it that might be is that a cheat code well i think they're trying to throw us off because they're like oh it's hot dog sandwich well bitch we just made it one i think we debated that too it is it's a sandwich but does that incorporate a sandwich to if it's yeah cuz the pizza is the bread of the sandwich it's a hot dog pizza sandwich it's a hot it's a HHP s valiant effort but that we tackled

that with yes who is that one that little Rob getting another submission again they're gonna like these they're gonna like this they he knew all right it's manscape season and let me tell you something i've only gotten compliments from my other guy friends about my bush recently or lack thereof and and they've been saying the same thing about morgues and garretts they've just been coming up to me people on the street recently have just said hey love the guys love you guys bush it's all right podcast sick bush bro sick bush less sick podcast but sick bush shitty pod and the reason for that is because of manscaped manscaped they got this lawnmower 4.0 this thing rips this thing just goes right across all the delicate areas like just it feels kind of like morg's mom just fondling like if you're

in the amazon you need a machete if you're a man you need manscape yeah it's like uh it is the three ply toilet paper of the trimming grooming world okay so you can use it for uh i think garrett was saying use your pubes one for your face and your face one for your yeah i alternate yeah i kind of got them mixed up like day one he had them labeled at the start but he mixes them up now and you can do the same thing honestly you only need one that's what i use i use a butthole the whole thing ass face ass face groom. Ass face, groom. So make sure you go to Manscaped and use the code NOFOMO for 20% off and free shipping. And what does free shipping mean? I mean, free shipping is free as it gets.

Free 99. You ever ship something and it costs you money? This isn't that. This is not the same. I mean, I just bought a whole bunch of stuff from Adam and Eve and that has not free shipping. Well, you didn't spend over $250. Yeah, they have a crazy high cap on there well it's pretty easy it's way too high and you'd think if me being a manscaped member they'd keep it lower but like i said that's 20 off and free shipping with code no fomo at manscaped

rip it and dip it and dip it and clip it okay um is it worse to be logan paul or adam the plug which one's who's adam oh adam the plug is the guy who just got his girlfriend raped. Oh, is his name Adam the Plug and his girlfriend's name is- Lena the Plug. Yeah. Okay. It's worse to be him. No, his name's Adam 22. Oh, no, because I forgot about all the stuff with Logan Paul's girl.

His name's not Adam the Plug. It's Adam 22. Oh, well, his podcast is called- No, her name's just Lena the Plug. Yeah. But he's a cuck. Adam the Plug is-'s just leah the plug yeah but he's a adam the plug his name's adam the plug now because he's a cuck bitch okay regardless um uh the logan paul stuff recently is oh this is this based on the recent thing yeah it has to be okay yeah that's i like the i like the recency do you know about the recent stuff with logan paul yeah that's what

the question is okay yeah wait that's how i know you wrote this one why because that's way too recent for this has been submitted last week these have been submitted on Tuesday No, but these were supposed to be the questions from the week before these are I just ranked them as good they were Okay, well you did it wrong all right. Well. I was fucking with you. I would say I would say it's actually Started at the beginning. It's a way tighter race What's up my wife? It's a way tighter race than I thought now that I'm thinking of it. Oh, yeah. No, honestly Here okay. I've got I've got a I've got a take. Yeah, go ahead. Go ahead I mean your girlfriend is gets is a porn star. Yes

Not you allowed her to get railed on camera. Yes, it backfired quite a bit Yeah in the public eye, but I think there was a scenario He could have figured out that this could have happened. Logan Paul. He definitely knew it was going to happen. I also think that they played into it. I think they played into it.

They definitely knew how it was going to go. The Logan Paul thing is just like, my chick's been ran through by like- 75 dicks? But not just dicks. Some of the biggest ballers 36 feet of day in it Is that around that? Like could you imagine if you found out one of those like celebrities fucked your girl?

Imagine like the whole roster is just fucking riffraff that one is fucked. That's rough. Yeah, and she wasn't even getting paid Yeah, no yeah the other one. She, she was getting paid. Just differently. No, but like. Well, also they weren't dating, though. They weren't dating. But like. Still smash. Riff Raff smash your chick, dude?

Well, here's the real thing with Logan Paul, or whichever Paul it is. Yeah. That sucks the most is he didn't know about this and thought that she was just like this. Like he had this idea. Yeah. Well, I think. And then you find out that she's actually just trying to like fuck every other person in the world no I don't think that's the case she's just she's dated she's been in like this

elite circle for like a decade but riffy raffi yeah that's pretty fucked dude fucking spider-man which one Toby I hope he's in there and what's the your line Harry Potter no see Harry's the... Harry Potter. No, see... Harry Potter's on his bitch? Harry Potter's on that bitch. Okay, here's the thing, though. I think it's gotten a little blown out of proportion because there's huge celebrities she's dated and stuff.

I don't think every guy she has a picture with, we can just assume that they hit it. I will. I can. I don't know. For my reasoning. Regardless, I would still be just like, holy fuck. This is tough.

Well, it's tough for him because he literally thought, this is why we have the rule. I like to think he knew. This is why we have the rule that you have to meet your friend's girl

a few times before you're dating because he didn't know this stuff and then you introduce him. Why do you think that he didn't know that? Because there's a podcast of him and her and some other guy

and they're like, newly dating at the time and he's like made him wait he's like asking her questions or both of them questions and he was like he says something like oh yeah i just this is why i was scared of this because like i don't really know her that well or something you think she was keeping that under wraps bro no bro there's pictures of she's dated like some of the biggest celebrities in the world like who she dated leonardo dicaprio that was very public he dated her for like multiple years that's a pro no i think that one's that one counts as a pro until she turned 25 yeah i'm sure i guarantee it yeah that was like that was like a long time ago so

she was definitely younger but like there's a lot of people that is widely known she dated so obviously she had sex with them i don't think it was like a nuke that she's hooked up with a bunch of celebrities but i think she admitted to like 50 of them the number's large she the numbers the numbers 50 counts 50 counts the number is definitely big look also with her she's relatively attractive like she's a supermodel. She's a supermodel. I would say she's got a high body count. I would say she's got a high body count. She's up there in the number scale.

Yeah. Okay. Would you rather it be like a roster of fucking celebrities or just no name people? I think I'd rather. No, no, no. Here's the real question. Would you rather it be a roster of celebrities or publicly fucked by another dude that's true oh fuck there's a video of her enjoying sex more with another guy my only thing is there's

no and you're married to her and you're married to her there's no there's no like actual proof that she had sex with like 80 of these people i'd prove it like there's just like the guy just literally posted a picture like Like she's with, obviously she's with all these celebrities. Yeah. You don't know that. Do we know why this guy went out of his way to do this? Dylan Danis? Cause he's a fucking killer.

Is he just like, they're fighting. They're fighting each other. Oh, they are? Yeah. Yeah. They're boxing each other.

Oh, okay. So it could just be a bunch of mumbo jumbo hype. No, I like it. I think it's true. I'm sure she's gotten ran through. Best pre-fight shit talking ever. Yeah. Yeah. That wins it. Like the, oh, I'm going to, I'm going to murder your family. I'm honestly I'm sure she's gotten right pre fight shit talking ever. Yeah, yeah that wins it

Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm gonna murder your family. I'm gonna fuck you up any of that Thank you real fuck 75. I'm just gonna post pictures of your girl with fucking celebrities and say that I'm pretty sure He's fucked her too though Has he almost almost positive everyone's fucked her dude. No I'm not Dr. I'm Photoshop pictures of us yeah oh that would have been good I'm not even kidding

I'm almost positive it's confirmed that he has fucked her good we gotta start that trend yeah just everybody post

pictures with her that's what he should have done yeah we'll do it let's do it cap cut template yeah

you just fucking put your face in the I fucked her too oh that's actually good yeah we'll do that

we'll do those those are coming out next week I hope he gets his fucking ass whooped though Dylan or Logan we've been hoping that word months. Yeah years now. Yeah years LPS fucking week, dude He's way bigger than Dylan Danis. Oh, isn't he? I don't know who Dylan Danis is. Yeah, I think that he's an actual fighter yeah, he used to be used to be McGregor's trainer or or

He's not a boxer. He's done MMA. I mean, it was like Bellator not UFC. What's Bellator boxer he's done mma but he does like bellator not ufc what's bellator it's like weaker ufc oh okay he used to be either he was in i want to say he was in mcgregor's not an octagon guy yeah he's like one of his in that whole thing one of his trainers i don't know if he trained him no i'm almost positive he's part of his crew yeah i don't think active fighters but he is a big yeah they do he is a big fucking shit talker well that's good i like that yeah death to paul but um i'd say it's a toss up there yeah i got it that's a that's a 50 50 yeah to be honest i don't love either one i'd rather be gay than either of those scenarios happen to me i'll say that well i think at least in the logan paul one he's just like dating her

it's an easy out no they're engaged recently engaged they got engaged like a month ago bro yeah this is how much i dive into those kind of things yeah but um yeah they both suck i wonder if he'll break it off who is that one from um that was for me you're not allowed to do this dude come on openly admit it dude it's a good question yeah i'm a fan this episode's not about you okay my bad you can ask that question my bad my bad fake fake fake okay you took up like 10 minutes of someone else's time all right my bad best highlighter color all right follow it up with that all right no this is real no i'm saying next i want your questions best highlighter best highlighter i'm dead ass serious next. Not yellow. Light blue?

Yeah, no, fuck this one. Who wrote this one? Kiana James. Kiana, get out. Okay. I'm sorry. You wrote that one down? That's on you more than her.

That's one you just skipped. That's more on you than her. I'm sorry. You said you ranked these in order of game. Look at him, he's sweating. He's wiping his face. He put that one after his question so it sounded so good. No, I really didn't. I'm sorry, Kiana. Kiana, we're sorry, but please. I'm sorry, Kiana. Please have a more intense question. these in order of sweating he put that one after his question so it sounded so good no i really

didn't i'm sorry we're sorry but please i'm sorry please have a more intense do better do better we love you though i'll send you dirty underwear all right um how many dicks could be lined up and you could still pick out which one is yours like two which one's mine yeah hard or soft if they're all the same if they're all the same color i don't know how good i'd do at this if they're all the same If they're all the same color I don't know how good I do at this if they're all the same color dude your dick is fucking rat, dude What do you mean? I could pick that out We have a very white dick. I have an immaculate penis. My dick is the tannest part of my body Which it doesn't say a lot. That's true

I'm not super confident. I think like maybe five harder soft Because there's a vein that I would be able to see one way I think five dicks five dicks before it gets complicated are they all the same size do I get to taste them do I get to taste them do you get to taste test them yeah and I don't even know what mine tastes like

I think... I would almost say unlimited. I think... Do I get to touch them? Well, the bulge would give yours away. Do I get to touch them? The bump on the top of yours would give it away. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

You could only touch them with your mouth. My teeth marks on yours would probably give it away. Bite marks? At the base? We can't be drinking during these things. Yeah, we can. Oh, why? It's too electric?

No, I'm going to drink another one. Are you kidding me? But I'd say a dozen or more. Baker's does. A baker's dozen. Yeah, I'm in on that. What do you think? I think like five, it would start to get complicated.

Well, I'm saying this like i can continue to reference mine if mine disappeared off my body and then into a lineup of dicks but you don't just get to look like it's like like it's like a ball pit of dicks and you have to find yours that's what i'm saying like you don't just it's gonna be tough you don't get to like oh the other question is do you get balls in there too because that makes it oh oh then i just know that it's the one with the small lefty yeah i do i know a lot of people have small left. Do they? Yeah. You guys have small left?

I have small left. No, I'm heavy left. I have an ill-descending left. Ill-decenter? Yeah, I have that too. Yeah. Okay, game. You have ill-decenter left?

Yeah. But it's smaller? I have a high-rise left. It hangs lower. No, I have a low-hang left. Higher. Higher, yeah. It hangs higher.

I have low-hang middle left. That's what's wrong with you. That's why we don't like you. No. Oh, it's something else Now maybe I could I could maybe do 25 here It depends on where I'm checking them out like picture by picture I could maybe do it, but if it's like a ball pit of dicks no, it's a dick lineup

Yeah 20 20 I'm going sub 10. Okay, hit me Like I see my dick all the time but like i don't know is there smell i don't really study it it's a picture yeah so yeah it smells like john's ass i know which one it's a scratch and sniff dick which everyone smells like garrett's cock all right okay that one was good that was from uh Fremont Music, our boy. Fremont. He actually hits pretty different in the questions. Yeah, he rips.

If you had to have a kink, which one would you choose? If you had to have a kink? That's assuming I don't. So one that I don't already have? Yeah, a different one. What does that leave us? Feet is like the only one. Yeah, feet might be one I don't fuck with.

I'm down for anything. Yeah, maybe I just hit the bingo on the board. Is there anyone that a girl would say to you and you'd be like, I'm not down to try that? I've said the only one that doesn't work for me. What? I think I've said it a few times. Slap the shit out of you? The breeding kink. Oh, the breeding one.

Like actually say like get me pregnant? Yeah. No. Well, while I was hooking up with her, she was saying like, what are you? I can't wait to see its little toes. Oh the breeding one. Yeah, I actually say like get me pregnant Yeah, no well while I was hooking up with her she was saying like what do you I can't wait to see its little toes Oh, okay that oh No, oh fuck no yeah, oh god. That's tough. That's okay. Not that one. Yeah, what are we gonna name it? What I Don't know if I had to have one, hooking up with chicks would be a cool kink. Liking vagina would be sick. Yeah, being into girls would be a fun kink.

I've always dreamt of liking that. That'd be wild. I've always pretended. If I had to have one, I feel like a super muscular chick or something. That'd be... Oh, yeah. Oh, like the Joe Red a chick that can armpit hair

Yeah, like sort of jack like she's kind of dangerous with it trannies would be kind of sick. I've already checked that box, so But it hasn't become a kink it was a one-off yeah So that's how you're committing to that one kinks what you don't need to do kinks all the time I mean it didn't feel it's like a birthday ice cream sort of deal you don't get it in every meal um you don't get them kind of happy happy birthday okay if i had to have one i don't know about it's a tough one because i'm i'm down like grandma's would be funny like that'd be a funny one to have that's not really a kink that's like a preference you know like a kink would be like a kink i think not a lot of people are fucking great no yeah a kink is like something you could like do with any person not like a it wouldn't be like a piss kink yeah yeah

oh yeah i maybe that yeah pissing on a girl i was saying pissing on me either way yeah pissing in general pissing yeah i'd be down for that. Piss kink? Done. Piss. I'd take that. Because I was thinking like bondage shit. I was like, I couldn't tie up a girl like super aggressively. Couldn't you? I'm talking like bondage.

Like I'm not like handcuffed and... What are we going to do with this? We got tied up in your room. That's not happening. She'll be fine. Yeah. I threw her a cheese. Do you need anything? I threw her a cheese earlier.

Ties me up. I could be into. That's what I'm saying. I don't think I would be into that. If I couldn't get out? I'd be more into getting pissed on than get tied up. You'd be more into getting pissed on? I am more. Yeah, I could.

Am more into. I've never had it either, but I would let either. You ever been pissed on? Grow up. Squirt, but not piss. That's the same thing. No, but I'm talking like stand above you and piss on you Oh, yeah, that's way better. Yeah, I mean I mean Didn't you have to do any work and she's squirting everywhere. That's mctribble mctribble. Yeah, shut up

Shut up big ups big ups bruv All right Big ups. Big ups, bruv. All right. God, these people are so sexual, dude. Hit it. Don't pick them.

Just read them. Just go them all? I'm trying to switch up the content here. You can just read them. We have to get through them all. Okay, how much is too much for a bag and how much is too little for a bag? I think anything over 100 is pretty aggressive. Anything over 100 is pretty aggressive, but too little for a bag? I think anything over $100 is pretty aggressive. Anything over $100 is pretty aggressive,

but too little is a weird one because free is cool. Free is good. If someone says $5 or $10, I don't like that. Yeah, it's somewhere between free and $50 for sure. Is too little? Yeah. No, no, above free, though, because free is fine. All right, if it's a full bag and it's less than 40.

Yeah, that's weird. And it's not like my absolute boy. Yeah. If it's a random bag guy and he says 40 bucks, I say fuck no. If someone said free, I'm fine with it though, no matter who. 100%. Well, because that happens. But if they said, oh, Venmo me 20.

Yeah. I got you for 20. I'd be. I think anything under 50 is suspect me 20. Yeah. I got you for 20. I'd be. I think anything under 50 is suspect as shit. Yeah. Honestly, in this market, 50 is suspect. I'm honestly not doing 50. Unless it's like the homie.

I'm not doing 50. If someone says. If it doesn't look immaculate at $50. No, I'm not doing 50. If someone says anything less than 70 in today's economy. They say less than 70 in today's economy. I'm like whoa bro yeah what's the deal you're asking them about it you're getting details you're like oh do you

are you like do you get this in bulk you're either like the direct plug yeah do you get this you're bumped into the guy who buys the kilos or or you accidentally gonna die or you're gonna die i don't know if there's too much though no there's a two there's more than i'm willing to pay i wouldn't pay more it depends on the scenario. Well, okay, there's times when I'll pay way more. If we're just talking like, hey, I'm gonna go pick up a bag, well, I'm not drunk yet. Anything over a hundred.

I would scoff at anything over a hundred. Even say desperation hours. I would scoff. Even desperation hours, like 5 a.m. you text someone and they're willing to deliver. $300. And they say $500. You're like, no. Oh, You text someone and they're willing to deliver 300 and they say they say 500 bucks You're like if we're splitting it up Wait could you show us what your scoff would be like?

120 Go fuck yourself. I like that you take cash or VIMO Go fuck yourself. I like that. You take cash or Venmo? Wait don't leave Let me think let me try to let you know that you're out of time bumpers Yeah, I want to let you know that you're outrageously out of pocket But if they could sell it really well if they're like dude trust me Yeah, if you tell me some bullshit like your whole you're gonna feel like you don't any teeth in your mouth after this Yeah, yeah, I've done the upper upper mouth numbingbing but he goes this whole you're not gonna do your bottom jaw

you're gonna think your lower jaw is missing like that's a good question what's the best selling point for a bag free i don't i don't think there needs to be one yeah but like he was saying best selling point did you have a beer already no like you were saying though like you can't feel you you have oh if you had to like really push your lower jaw Like if there was a bunch of them. Yeah, you might want to join the homeless after that Yeah, no, yeah, it's not good, but okay who's Alan Jordan Meeks Jordan Meeks wait I know that name do you I don't know sounds like a homie though, though. Jordan Meeseeks. Jordan Meeseeks. Claps cheeks, dude. Beaks and weeks. Guys, I've been absolutely bombing myself this one. You don't have to say that.

It's for the people at home. Okay, would you rather have to object at every wedding or take a selfie at every funeral? Like with an open casket type of joint? Like take a selfie with a dead person? Yeah. This is a you one No, I sort of got okay Objecting every wedding you'll you you get uninvited after about two I'd say yeah, you just wouldn't go to a lot of weddings

You wouldn't get to a lot of funerals, would you? You're taking selfies with Grammy fucking deceased. They're both so fucked up. Yeah You can sneak a selfie you can if you're quick with it You can get away fucked up. You could sneak a selfie. Yeah, if you're quick with it, you could get away with it. You could sneak a selfie, you can't sneak an objection. You can't sneak an objection, yeah. Now, there might be an argument for the selfie, too, like one last one. Well, how far do you have to... Yeah, you could make it...

That's what I'm saying. You could make it... You could either sneak it or if someone caught you, you're just like... Yeah. Like, you could almost... Don't forget. You could cry. You could be crying in it.

You could gaslight someone out of being offended against... I could do that either way. Yeah. Against the funeral selfie, you funeral selfie. You can be like what dude's my fucking grandma. Yeah Yeah, sorry how far do you have to go if it's your family member you take a selfie? No one's gonna say fuck okay? I'm saying like if I go to your grandma's funeral, and I take a selfie people like That is different How far do you have to go with the objection because it could be cut become kind of a bit where it's like okay you know at some point garrett's gonna stand up go i object yeah you can make it you can play it off funny yeah but if you have to like actually like try to stop the wedding that's a little bit on it wait hold on a second how do objections work

at weddings you just stand up and start yelling do you have to plead your case though or do you just say i object uh like is anyone like why if they really do happen yelling. Do you have to plead your case, though, or do you just say, I object? Like, is anyone like, why? If they really do happen, I feel like you got to go up there and say it. Also, like, you would have to explain it, right? Also, like, the last couple of weddings I've been to. You should have objected. Like, isn't there usually a sentence where they say, like, if anyone objects? I think they might have taken that out.

Yeah, they might have. Or is that just only in, like, super religious weddings? Maybe that they might have taken that out. Yeah, they might have taken that out. Or is that just only in like super religious weddings? Maybe that's just like a movie thing, like it doesn't actually happen. I think it's only in like a very like classic like Catholic or Christian wedding. Yeah, wait, why would that even be in a wedding? Well, because if it's bad, like this is the perfect time to wait to do it. Maybe hash this out.

Wait, I fucked her. Hash this out before the altar maybe? Yeah. Yeah. Honestly, if I was, if it was my wedding and you had a good reason to object like my wife to be like i fucked her like yeah you fucked her or someone fucked her and you waited until the wedding to do it i'd be like yo what the fuck dog yeah that's pretty outlandish yeah that is pretty tough like you wait till now you couldn't wait until you couldn't

have said it a week earlier when i didn't pay for all this shit that's tough yeah that's kind of a fucked up thing to do yeah it's honestly worse like if anyone thinks they have the grounds to object you think they have do you think they have to explain it after well it doesn't stop the wedding well because okay so do you think so let me pitch you this scenario then it's your wedding someone says stands up and says i object and then just sits back i'm gonna have snipers that's bad and then just sits back down. I'm going to have snipers. That's badass. And then just sits back. They're just like, I object. Sits back down, doesn't say anything. That's badass.

And then they're like, okay, so do you, Garrett Beaupre, take it? Yeah, just proceed? Yeah, you're like, no, hold on a second. Go back to him. Wait, hold the fuck. No, I just don't like it. Pastor, shut the fuck up for a minute. Let this guy. Hold on, don't speed through this fucker. Let's see what he's got to say for a second. No, I don't know when that ever was a thing or if it even really was. It might be like, you know,

like the old gladiator thing where they do that in the movie, but that's not real. Yeah. Funeral selfies are kind of badass. I'm going funeral selfie. The wedding thing is too precious. The object now, I just want to know-

If I ever cared enough to object, I would probably let them know the second they proposed I'd shoot him a mad text right unless you have to do this Unless you have to have to Because not saying that has to be real is saying yeah, I just have to like fuck with people Yeah, I'm going funeral selfie. Yeah funeral selfies bad. Yeah That's a good one. That's at

Also, the thing is like at you know like you're there's gonna be weddings. We're gonna want to go to there's never a funeral I'm gonna want to go to you. Oh you No Like there's gonna be weddings We're gonna wanna go to There's never a funeral I'm gonna wanna go to Uh no there's a couple No I feel like there's gonna be Way more weddings You wanna go to than funerals I've never been to a funeral though

You've never been to a funeral No They're sick They're hell They absolutely rip dude It's really uncomfortable That one was from Arby's But is that how you spell A-R-B- spell a RBE s no Arby's is with a Y

So that's a better Arby's a good one. It's a better one that one's got legs. Yeah, that one's pretty good Alright, John shit. We're back. All right is John a dad if not I'm trying to make him one What guys name is that one from? That's from LDGK69. There's no L girl names, is there? Lorraine. Lorraine. Lauren. Lisa.

Lady. He's not, but you can make him one. Lamp. I could be. Technically. There's a chance. There's a chance. There's a shot No Go with no also. Yeah, you have to who's that one from?

LDG case is that a is that a not not an Instagram one? My I don't know if it's in Instagram or discord, you know hit me up Yeah, well figured out I don't know if it's Instagram or Discord. Hit me up. We'll figure it out. I'll run through. I'll send you my ancestry DNA. Part one answers no. Part two is hit my line. We'll see.

If you could perform any immoral experiment, what would you do? Immoral experiment? Yeah. Release a variant of the flu into the U.S. So COVID? Yeah.

That was the bit. Jesus Christ. That was the bit, you fucking Jesus, dude. Okay, my bad. You're an ape. See? I would wrangle up all the Jews. Oh, my god.

There he is, folks. Garrett. What? I was going off the obviously something that's already happened before thing. Okay, the keeping people up as long as you could would be kind of fun to watch for a little bit. I'm genuinely out on this question. I'm not sick of it.

There's nothing I would... I think it's a funny... There's not even something funny I could think of that is just like no I don't think like that. I guess I would have to work it backwards to see like what's the Like what's the outcome of it like what am I trying to solve like oh? It's a cure for cancer and all I have to do is like Punch little kids or something for the experiment interesting yeah, okay? Like it's tough to think of something that I got I got one one we can all- Or like crossbreeding humans with animals.

I got one we can all agree on. A definite- like a genuine test of how far you can kick a baby. That's a good one. Now, we already did that last week. That's why I did it. This is the test, you fuck. God, he's bad. God, you're an idiot. Turn your mic off. Do you understand how jokes work? No, I'm trying to figure it out. He's like autistic. Worse than even when he doesn't drink. Jesus Christ. Dude, that's what the Tulsa show is about, dude, I'm trying to figure it out. He's like autistic It worse than even when he doesn't drink. Yeah, you're cut off. That's what the talk shows about dude

I'm trying to figure it out. I mean that wasn't even a word that you said in the second guys I've done too much reading here. Okay. Yeah, that's the problem You know bum no, I don't need a bump why not Fancy a bump fancy Fancy a bump. Bye Okay, hey bruv What you got imp? Chimp, how do you ask a girl to leave after a quickie? Um I never have I never have

You want to know how not to do it This is the one I did um okay so after quickie pretended like i was really really drunk and felt sick and then asked my friend to drive her home that's a good poo that's a good play wait what was the first word did you say i don't know i was gonna say i said move and play at the same time so that's a good Good I think a fair play is yeah Just well like tell you have to make more come quickies tough because the morning play any a ways to get out of it the Morning plays easy, but if you're talking about like it right after yeah morning

Oh, I got it. I got a I have work shit to do or something I have to study how to make you just get in the shower Just immediately wake up and get in the shower and it's like okay Yeah, the morning ones easy, but if you're talking about like they come over Say 10 p.m.. Little Netflix and chill then you're like trying to get him out by like 1 a.m. Yeah, this isn't like a quickie. This is like how do you get rid of them after you you've sealed the deal? Yeah, it's more the question well. That's what a quickie is just like you're just trying to pound and get them out Well, I guess I feel like I associate quickie with like someone that i'm like well you do a quickie like you like you you agree on it like hey you down for a quickie oh no if you're in like a relationship like a

quickie it's like hey we're about to we gotta we gotta go to this but you're talking about like a quick hookup just like a like they come over there's no good way well it's not about good ways what's the best way the best way? The best way? I think you... Text a friend, fake a phone call about something horrible happening. No, it's how do you ask her to leave? It's how do you do it? Oh, how do you do it? Well, you just start working in the convo, like, stuff you gotta do.

Say you have an early morning. It's right here. It's like, oh. Oh, sh... Fucking goddammit. No, you just start. You wait for them to ask. You're just like oh oh i fucking god damn it no you just start you wait for them to ask you just you're just like oh damn it and they're like what and they're like you just start saying oh damn it i fucking i gotta what about while you're still fucking i forgot just so you know you have to leave after right you get with the rest right as you're like oh you gotta go you gotta get your fingers here that might be the best way

dude oh dude or you just start doing or just leave that dude i think i think you could just leave i think you literally come and you roll over you go holy fuck what have i done i have a wife and kids like what am i doing you could fake a whole relationship freak out just have like a full-blown panic attack like you gotta go you could fake call another girl you pretend like you gotta you have to you're like should i leave like you could just call myself an uber Yeah out of your own house. Yeah. Yeah, you could just leave. Yeah. No, you're just like I'm sorry I got you like ooh Then I don't want to I don't want to tell this on the record. I have a good story

Yeah, you don't have to I don't think I should don. Don't. Or you could just start working. Like, just make it like a... Well, okay, I just, like, I hid in... I hid... When we were in college, I just, like, hid in another person's bedroom for, like, multiple hours until, like, hoping... Oh, a little fresh. I had to leave. I had people go check to see if they were gone yet.

Is Garrett in here? No. Oh. Who's that one from? Okay, there you go. That one's from Stoned Effie. That sounds right. What else should

have a super size option super size besides it like a drive-thru um bags yes that's that's easy yes that's good well if it's to scale right okay because remember you could just be like oh you want to supersize it for two dollars yeah yeah Would I like to supersize my bag for $2? Yeah. Yeah. It's only, we're going to round up. Like 50 cents more, you get a large. Yeah, it's got to be to scale.

If it's like, oh, you want to supersize the bag, it's double? Yeah, double. Yeah, so it has to be like a cheaper amount. Well, how big is the supersize? Yeah, what's the deal? If it comes in a McDonald's cup? Yeah, absolutely.

What's the deal is what we're asking. Supersize, things that should be supersized. Girls' butts constantly, no matter what. No matter how big? Yep, double it. Don't even ask me. Does anyone remember the OG supersize? What was the difference?

McDonald's? That's just like extra, extra. It was large fries, large drink. It's just one burger and you get a- Yeah, so it was your meal. Supersize the fries and the drink. How big was a supersize cup? Because I swear the large these days is...

I think it was like 64 ounces. You're different. That's like what you buy a jug of lemonade in. Oh, no. It was disgusting. No, I'm not even kidding. It's almost a gallon. Why did you get rid of that?

A Simply Lemonade... Because people were abusing it because it's too good. A Simply... It was too big of a steal. A Simply Lemonade is 64 ounces. Like a jug that you got from the grocery store. It's a half gallon, right? 64 ounces?

I think it's a full quart. Three pints. Two pints in a quart? Yeah. No, no. Four pints in a quart. It's at least a half gallon. Yeah.

It's about a half gallon. A half gal? Dude, that shit was so good that people were just getting fatter and shit. Did that fix anything? No. Because you just get two well no also also they just made the large the same size i swear to god yeah oh yeah it is 64 is exactly a half gallon yeah you googled that that's is it 128 ounces of the gallon let's go that's what i thought

i don't know what else should have this super size option a half gallon of fucking pepsi are you fucking dude that's a lot of fucking if you order that if you order that honestly you deserve to die dude how could you do anything after that we took away natural selection dude when we got jack in the box i couldn't sleep for like hours after drinking that fucking lemonade and we got lemonade and we got a large we didn't get an extra large yeah what what could you actually do after 64 ounces of Pepsi? Just piss. Be more.

Okay, you have to piss eight times. What's the most socially unacceptable hobby you could think of? Biking. Biking is up there. Sewing. Off topic, slightly. There's one that I want to get into. It's uh, grubbing is what it's called. Grubbing?

Yeah, so you get these two sticks. There's a one stick that's got like ribs on it and the other one you rub on that and it makes this noise and worms come to it for some reason. Really? I saw it on TikTok. I wanted to, I want to try it. Yeah. That sounds incredible. Yeah. Dude, the video of it is unreal. This guy's just like rubbing the stick and there's like 20 worms just come up.

No way. Wait, you rub a pole and worms come to it? So you have a wood stick. One of them's got like ribs on it and the other one you rub on that and then these worms just come out of nowhere. That sounds kind of incredible, honestly. And it's called what? Grubbing. Grubbing? Yeah, a main on grubbing. That sounds kind of incredible. And it's called what? Grubbing. Grubbing. Yeah, my non-grubbing.

That's kind of fucked up. That is not on my list of things that will be bad. That's awesome. I'm looking it up. It looks sick. For some reason, I... Are you looking it up? Worm grubbing? Did it come up?

No. Do I have the right name? Type in worm with it. Worm calling. Worm wrangling. Worm swooning. Worm grunting. Grunting?

Oh, maybe it's grunting. Yep. Hmm. Watch how many worms come up. And they come to the stick. No, this is a real thing. According to a modern farmer, worm grunting works because of vibrations created by the metal And wood sound to worms like the sounds of a hungry mole

They have to like get out of the ground. Oh, so they're running away from the mole. Yeah Okay That that sounds lit. Yeah, pretty good. Could you imagine going outside and just be like watch this and just fucking Worms get a call that I would literally Bow down to someone if they did that. That would be witchcraft dude. I could see you doing that right? Yeah, no, that's up your alley Yeah, that would be right up my that's what I'm trying to get into it. Heal-ying worm grubbing. Heal-ying. Heal-ying. I really do have something against running as well Like just as something you do every day. It's I don't hate fine if you do this exercise is weird if you enjoy it

Like if you start telling me like oh, I just get like a runner's high people who are runners like yeah You don't get a high you're probably like lack of oxygen. You're probably high as fuck that's what you're doing Yeah, lack of oxygen your brain is fucking pissed. Cause it's I mean okay if you're doing it on the street It's kind of better because like you're trying to not get hit by cars and shit, but What like down here it's kind of fun cuz there's homeless dodging Oh, no, it's an event down here. Yeah, there's like something to do, but just running shit I don't think I don't think that even that doesn't touch biking Yeah, like the other day fucking I was driving outside and fucking there's a homeless lady

Just walking with a knife out front like this how is that our girl, huh? I think she was a different one different girl with a thick as shit though. Okay. Did you clap? So that's probably why she's like she knows what's about to happen. Yeah, cuz yeah, he's trying to fight off all the dicks Yeah, she can't be walking around with that ass on a fucking Wednesday, but running in and of itself It's pretty boring Vikings way gayer. It's more the day you do it for me on the running like Saturday Sunday eat shit Saturday morning runner. Yeah, like when you're driving home or in an uber and you see someone jogging you're like Yeah, you know, but oh, but if you saw someone biking you wouldn't want to hit them No biking is up there, too

Well, I've said this a hundred times if you ever see me biking hit me with your car I just think it's the outfits and the helmet like Yeah, the tight fit Like runner you could you could be running in anything But it does bug me when you see someone running and they can't run correctly Oh being bad at running like really poor form running poor form didn't we say that's part of the checklist for? Girlfriends I think we might add that running form running running forms, but that's an egg if you have to running Yeah, I can see Macy running a little off- kilter. No, she's got wrists down for sure.

She's hands down. No, she's athletic as fuck. Hopefully. Hopefully you can't prove it. You're still thinking of an intuition. Starting any combat sport after 30, I feel like. No, way sooner than that. If you start wrestling at 30, that's just...

Yeah, that's a rough one. I don't hate if people get into, like, jiu-jitsu or something cool later in life to exercise. Jiu-jitsu is one that's kind of, like, almost, like, self-defense-y. It's tapping you out. I could be fine with that. Yeah. But, like... Well, I don't think anyone does wrestling after high school.

Maybe karate. Karate. Karate's bad. Karate doesn't work, first of all. It's not real. No. I don't even know how they... Yeah.

How did they fucking get onto that uh it doesn't work ancient martial art i think but it's still a thing i bet you someone who is a black belt in karate could beat the fuck i bet the fuck not i'll kick their chest in swear to god all right good no okay but should we mention like not getting this on the loan do you want to you can just did huh well yes i mean some of them just got a little repetitive so we didn't want to do cock and balls the whole time but yeah we do appreciate i just think uh our fan base is very like-minded so a lot of the questions they know what we like yeah you nailed them but like we just couldn't answer the same question 10 times yeah not that you would

know that the question was even asked so it's not not your fault. Yeah, and we'll decide the... How do we want to decide the winner? We'll go back and we'll... When we're editing, we'll rewatch all of them. Okay. All right, folks. See you guys next week. Peace.